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1
00:00:14,413 --> 00:00:16,447
Congratulations, one and all,
2
00:00:16,448 --> 00:00:19,447
and welcome to Twisted Metal.
3
00:00:19,448 --> 00:00:20,757
There are rules here.
4
00:00:20,758 --> 00:00:22,930
No killing outside of an official round.
5
00:00:23,931 --> 00:00:25,033
But there are also perks.
6
00:00:25,034 --> 00:00:27,723
I provided delightful
accommodations for you.
7
00:00:27,724 --> 00:00:29,241
Great. High school.
8
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It's bringing back, like,
so many memories.
9
00:00:31,103 --> 00:00:32,274
It's crazy.
10
00:00:32,275 --> 00:00:33,412
I've seen the way
you're acting with Mike,
11
00:00:33,413 --> 00:00:35,550
and I don't like it.
12
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I friggin' love it.
13
00:00:37,206 --> 00:00:38,550
The last driver behind the wheel
14
00:00:38,551 --> 00:00:40,067
gets their wish granted.
15
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One wish per car.
16
00:00:42,241 --> 00:00:44,240
I wish for all the walls to come down
17
00:00:44,241 --> 00:00:46,067
in every city, everywhere.
18
00:00:48,068 --> 00:00:49,344
The mask.
19
00:00:49,689 --> 00:00:51,896
I wish to bring Krista back to life.
20
00:00:53,103 --> 00:00:54,826
I did something behind Quiet's back.
21
00:00:54,827 --> 00:00:55,895
I don't know what
I'm gonna do about it, man.
22
00:00:55,896 --> 00:00:57,067
I never lied to her before.
23
00:00:59,655 --> 00:01:00,964
We can't afford another day like this.
24
00:01:00,965 --> 00:01:02,688
John! This is life and death.
25
00:01:02,689 --> 00:01:03,999
I've never seen you like this.
26
00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:06,309
- What's going on?
- I lied to you, Quiet.
27
00:01:06,310 --> 00:01:08,137
I made my own wish.
28
00:01:44,827 --> 00:01:46,136
Morning.
29
00:01:46,137 --> 00:01:47,344
What can I get you?
30
00:01:48,034 --> 00:01:50,378
I need an anniversary cake
31
00:01:50,379 --> 00:01:52,068
that feeds eight.
32
00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:54,379
Express delivery.
33
00:01:57,206 --> 00:01:58,655
That's a big-ass cake.
34
00:01:59,551 --> 00:02:01,034
It's a special occasion.
35
00:02:04,896 --> 00:02:06,172
Put it on my tab.
36
00:02:08,103 --> 00:02:09,103
You got it.
37
00:02:39,655 --> 00:02:41,655
What the fuck?
38
00:03:45,482 --> 00:03:46,482
Hey.
39
00:03:48,241 --> 00:03:50,172
Looks like someone had a wet dream.
40
00:03:51,103 --> 00:03:52,309
The fuck?
41
00:03:52,310 --> 00:03:53,310
Goodnight kiss?
42
00:03:56,172 --> 00:03:57,309
Fuck my life.
43
00:04:07,655 --> 00:04:08,964
I'm not being selfish!
44
00:04:08,965 --> 00:04:11,033
You made your own wish
and didn't tell me.
45
00:04:11,034 --> 00:04:13,826
You put our lives, the mission,
all of us in danger!
46
00:04:13,827 --> 00:04:15,516
And this is why I didn't
want to tell you!
47
00:04:15,517 --> 00:04:17,172
And that's pretty fucking selfish.
48
00:04:27,379 --> 00:04:28,757
What the hell are you looking at?
49
00:04:28,758 --> 00:04:30,309
A lonely soul.
50
00:04:30,310 --> 00:04:32,343
But you can always join us.
51
00:04:32,344 --> 00:04:34,034
Fuck off, Grimm job!
52
00:04:36,172 --> 00:04:38,516
Hmm, looks like
53
00:04:38,517 --> 00:04:40,965
that hot potato is back on the market.
54
00:04:41,379 --> 00:04:44,516
Really? No more John?
55
00:04:44,517 --> 00:04:45,999
Good.
56
00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:47,999
Makes 'em easier to pick off
if they're weak.
57
00:04:48,000 --> 00:04:49,654
Like little fishies.
58
00:05:03,068 --> 00:05:06,171
Seriously, John,
you are being so small minded!
59
00:05:06,172 --> 00:05:08,378
You don't think I wanted to wish
for a million fucking things?
60
00:05:08,379 --> 00:05:09,964
But this is bigger than us,
61
00:05:09,965 --> 00:05:11,792
and you are being an asshole
for not getting that.
62
00:05:11,793 --> 00:05:13,895
Fuck! I can't even
look at you right now.
63
00:05:13,896 --> 00:05:15,412
No problem!
64
00:05:15,413 --> 00:05:16,448
I'm leaving.
65
00:05:23,793 --> 00:05:25,000
Oh!
66
00:05:25,413 --> 00:05:27,585
Trying to wash the odor of betrayal
67
00:05:27,586 --> 00:05:29,034
off your hot little body?
68
00:05:29,379 --> 00:05:30,895
That's right, Stinky titties,
69
00:05:30,896 --> 00:05:32,413
everyone in here knows what happened
70
00:05:32,620 --> 00:05:35,275
because the walls are paper thin.
71
00:05:37,034 --> 00:05:38,723
I didn't betray anybody.
72
00:05:38,724 --> 00:05:40,171
Oh, okay.
73
00:05:40,172 --> 00:05:41,931
Keep telling yourself that, tough guy.
74
00:05:43,620 --> 00:05:47,068
♪ Vermin knows the truth
75
00:05:52,448 --> 00:05:53,482
I actually have to go this way.
76
00:06:03,206 --> 00:06:05,034
Somebody's got to fix these lights.
77
00:06:14,172 --> 00:06:16,136
When I took the Hippocratic oath,
78
00:06:16,137 --> 00:06:17,826
I swore that I would uphold
79
00:06:17,827 --> 00:06:20,826
the best interests of all my patients.
80
00:06:20,827 --> 00:06:22,757
I appreciate the concern, doc.
81
00:06:22,758 --> 00:06:24,826
I'm in the best shape of my life.
82
00:06:24,827 --> 00:06:27,654
Um, actually, that's why
I wanted to speak with you.
83
00:06:27,655 --> 00:06:30,964
I received the results
of your physical exam,
84
00:06:30,965 --> 00:06:34,171
and, well, there's no easy
way to say this,
85
00:06:34,172 --> 00:06:35,620
but I found something.
86
00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:38,137
Wait. Are you serious, doc?
87
00:06:38,862 --> 00:06:39,896
Yes.
88
00:06:42,137 --> 00:06:43,379
I thought I'd have more time.
89
00:06:44,172 --> 00:06:47,344
Life is so incredibly
precious, isn't it?
90
00:06:48,310 --> 00:06:49,654
All right.
91
00:06:49,655 --> 00:06:51,240
Don't sugarcoat it. Hit me straight.
92
00:06:51,241 --> 00:06:52,310
I can take it.
93
00:06:55,379 --> 00:06:56,586
You're sterile.
94
00:06:57,827 --> 00:07:00,550
Oh. Well, that explains the weird rash.
95
00:07:00,551 --> 00:07:03,274
No, no. Th-that's psoriasis.
96
00:07:03,275 --> 00:07:05,550
Being sterile means
that you can't have children.
97
00:07:05,551 --> 00:07:07,620
Hey, I can have as many
children as I want.
98
00:07:08,758 --> 00:07:10,586
I mean, duh, kidnapping.
99
00:07:11,620 --> 00:07:13,344
I-I mean, biologically.
100
00:07:15,724 --> 00:07:17,172
Let me explain.
101
00:07:20,275 --> 00:07:23,240
You see the testicles?
They make the sperm.
102
00:07:23,241 --> 00:07:25,930
I got plenty of testicles.
What seems to be the problem?
103
00:07:25,931 --> 00:07:27,895
Actually, you have too many testicles.
104
00:07:27,896 --> 00:07:30,102
And unfortunately, none of them work.
105
00:07:30,103 --> 00:07:32,343
Yours can't make sperm.
106
00:07:32,344 --> 00:07:34,758
- Do-do you understand?
- Yes.
107
00:07:37,275 --> 00:07:38,862
No, no, I do not.
108
00:07:49,310 --> 00:07:51,309
I can tell by your grunting,
109
00:07:51,310 --> 00:07:54,067
you and the chatty man are at war.
110
00:07:54,068 --> 00:07:55,517
Unfortunate.
111
00:07:56,000 --> 00:07:58,379
A good cock is
a terrible thing to waste.
112
00:07:58,965 --> 00:08:02,343
If you no longer have use,
shall I have him?
113
00:08:02,344 --> 00:08:04,964
You don't need to ask me.
John does what he wants.
114
00:08:04,965 --> 00:08:07,136
He can fuck you, make his own wish,
115
00:08:07,137 --> 00:08:08,550
jump off a fucking building.
116
00:08:08,551 --> 00:08:11,481
- I don't care anymore.
- Excellent.
117
00:08:11,482 --> 00:08:13,136
I'm glad you approve.
118
00:08:13,137 --> 00:08:16,447
For even in the Arctic
wasteland I call home,
119
00:08:16,448 --> 00:08:18,619
to violate the girl code
would be something...
120
00:08:24,137 --> 00:08:26,136
Good evening, my drivers.
121
00:08:26,137 --> 00:08:28,136
Excellent showing in the last round.
122
00:08:28,137 --> 00:08:30,205
You did so well,
123
00:08:30,206 --> 00:08:33,274
I planned a little bonus round.
124
00:08:34,827 --> 00:08:37,274
I trust you're all ready to fight.
125
00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:41,309
Oh, shit, shit. Shit!
126
00:08:41,310 --> 00:08:42,861
I've invited some new friends
127
00:08:42,862 --> 00:08:46,999
to join the fray, the Apocalypse Nine.
128
00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:51,102
They feel nothing
and are very hard to kill.
129
00:08:51,103 --> 00:08:53,619
They are the ultimate hunters of man,
130
00:08:53,620 --> 00:08:55,343
and they are on your scent.
131
00:08:55,344 --> 00:08:58,309
It's a shame you won't
have your weapons,
132
00:08:58,310 --> 00:09:01,068
but I've always found artillery
to be a crutch.
133
00:09:01,413 --> 00:09:03,688
You'll just have to use brains, brawn,
134
00:09:03,689 --> 00:09:05,516
and good old American gumption.
135
00:09:07,482 --> 00:09:09,826
The rules are simple.
136
00:09:09,827 --> 00:09:12,378
All of you versus all of them.
137
00:09:12,379 --> 00:09:13,481
Quiet.
138
00:09:13,482 --> 00:09:14,550
Whoever's left standing
139
00:09:14,551 --> 00:09:17,240
when the sun rises will move on.
140
00:09:17,241 --> 00:09:18,550
Good luck.
141
00:09:20,896 --> 00:09:23,103
There.
142
00:09:23,344 --> 00:09:24,482
Now nobody can get in.
143
00:09:38,586 --> 00:09:40,137
I can't get my gas.
144
00:09:40,965 --> 00:09:42,241
We're all gonna die.
145
00:10:15,413 --> 00:10:19,481
It burns. It burns!
146
00:10:57,586 --> 00:10:59,275
That was a waste of a shower.
147
00:11:00,275 --> 00:11:02,309
You saved me.
148
00:11:02,310 --> 00:11:03,930
For now.
149
00:11:03,931 --> 00:11:06,136
I plan on eviscerating you
in the next round.
150
00:11:06,137 --> 00:11:08,172
But first, we need to
take care of these fuckers.
151
00:11:12,655 --> 00:11:13,724
Get your ass up.
152
00:11:57,551 --> 00:11:58,861
Man, what the hell are you doing?
153
00:11:58,862 --> 00:12:00,723
I don't know. I thought you were, like,
154
00:12:00,724 --> 00:12:03,205
an evil basketball dude or something.
155
00:12:03,206 --> 00:12:05,171
Evil basketball dude?
What the fuck is that?
156
00:12:05,172 --> 00:12:07,895
We've been living with
the abominable snow tits
157
00:12:07,896 --> 00:12:10,137
and a bug fucker.
How am I the asshole here?
158
00:12:14,137 --> 00:12:15,758
What... where are you going?
159
00:12:16,172 --> 00:12:18,378
To find Quiet.
I have to make sure she's okay.
160
00:12:18,379 --> 00:12:20,724
Yikes. You sure you want to do that?
161
00:12:21,137 --> 00:12:22,550
You don't know the full story.
162
00:12:22,551 --> 00:12:24,309
I know you screwed up.
163
00:12:24,310 --> 00:12:26,343
Relationships are built on trust, John.
164
00:12:26,344 --> 00:12:27,826
These are complicated emotions,
165
00:12:27,827 --> 00:12:28,895
and you wouldn't understand.
166
00:12:28,896 --> 00:12:30,378
Oh, I wouldn't?
167
00:12:30,379 --> 00:12:31,723
I'm a divorcee.
168
00:12:42,724 --> 00:12:44,067
Oh, shit!
169
00:12:46,724 --> 00:12:48,689
Is that fucking Freddy Krueger?
170
00:13:20,724 --> 00:13:22,274
Did he say we're going to die?
171
00:13:22,275 --> 00:13:23,447
Because if the dude
with metal arms is scared,
172
00:13:23,448 --> 00:13:24,551
we're fucked.
173
00:13:25,068 --> 00:13:27,758
Hey, there, Gilbert Grape,
174
00:13:28,965 --> 00:13:30,274
what's eating ya?
175
00:13:30,275 --> 00:13:32,447
I can't fight without gas, man.
176
00:13:32,448 --> 00:13:33,792
I can't fight, I can't kill,
177
00:13:33,793 --> 00:13:34,930
we're all fucking dead.
178
00:13:34,931 --> 00:13:37,067
I need it, man. I need the gas.
179
00:13:37,068 --> 00:13:39,309
- I need that shit!
- Hey, man, it's cool.
180
00:13:39,310 --> 00:13:40,826
Nobody has their wheels this round.
181
00:13:40,827 --> 00:13:43,309
I don't need it for my wheels, dumbass.
182
00:13:43,310 --> 00:13:45,827
I need it for me. I drink it.
183
00:13:46,137 --> 00:13:48,930
I'm a killing machine powered
by pure premium unleaded.
184
00:13:48,931 --> 00:13:50,241
Fuck!
185
00:13:50,965 --> 00:13:52,619
Oh, okay.
186
00:13:52,620 --> 00:13:54,413
That's very different.
187
00:13:54,793 --> 00:13:57,792
Let's leave the opinions
outside, Stuart.
188
00:13:57,793 --> 00:13:59,654
It's a judgment free zone up in he-ah.
189
00:13:59,655 --> 00:14:01,793
He said he drinks the gas up in he-ah.
190
00:14:03,724 --> 00:14:05,826
Are you saying you need the gas in here?
191
00:14:05,827 --> 00:14:08,205
Is it what you need in here?
192
00:14:08,206 --> 00:14:09,481
What the fuck?
193
00:14:09,482 --> 00:14:11,206
Hey, Dave, Dave, Dave.
194
00:14:11,689 --> 00:14:14,724
I think we both know what time it is.
195
00:14:15,655 --> 00:14:17,517
Oh, I'm picking up what
you're putting down, Michael.
196
00:14:18,724 --> 00:14:20,826
- Grab some chairs.
- You got it, bud.
197
00:14:20,827 --> 00:14:22,999
Uh, what time is it?
198
00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:24,688
It's time for Dave
to turn this shit around.
199
00:14:24,689 --> 00:14:26,033
That's what time it is.
200
00:14:26,034 --> 00:14:27,516
Didn't you hear Calypso?
201
00:14:27,517 --> 00:14:28,826
There's a group of psychos
trying to kill us.
202
00:14:28,827 --> 00:14:30,033
If Axel's our best fighter,
203
00:14:30,034 --> 00:14:31,343
let's just get him the gas.
204
00:14:31,344 --> 00:14:33,689
Axel's most important fight
205
00:14:34,000 --> 00:14:35,068
is the one from within.
206
00:14:35,862 --> 00:14:37,379
Gentlemen,
207
00:14:38,620 --> 00:14:40,205
we're having an intervention.
208
00:14:40,206 --> 00:14:41,586
What?
209
00:14:43,413 --> 00:14:44,551
You're gonna love it.
210
00:14:58,068 --> 00:15:00,343
Any idea who these bottom feeders are?
211
00:15:00,344 --> 00:15:02,827
The Apocalypse Nine.
They're fucking nuts.
212
00:15:03,068 --> 00:15:04,585
You know why their skin is yellow?
213
00:15:04,586 --> 00:15:06,482
They burn their nerve endings
so they don't feel shit.
214
00:15:06,965 --> 00:15:08,447
So where's John?
215
00:15:08,448 --> 00:15:10,447
I thought you assholes
couldn't go anywhere alone.
216
00:15:10,448 --> 00:15:12,585
- That's none of your business.
- Oh, fuck.
217
00:15:12,586 --> 00:15:15,551
So it's true then.
He made a different wish.
218
00:15:15,758 --> 00:15:17,724
Please, you don't think these
gossipy bitches talk?
219
00:15:18,551 --> 00:15:19,930
I'm up here thinking about
220
00:15:19,931 --> 00:15:21,136
the greater good of all humanity.
221
00:15:21,137 --> 00:15:22,274
He's potentially fucking it all up
222
00:15:22,275 --> 00:15:23,447
just thinking about himself.
223
00:15:23,448 --> 00:15:25,551
So what did he wish for?
224
00:15:25,793 --> 00:15:27,103
To bring his sister back to life.
225
00:15:27,413 --> 00:15:29,274
Oh, interesting.
226
00:15:29,275 --> 00:15:30,895
What is that supposed to mean?
227
00:15:30,896 --> 00:15:32,792
I don't know. He seems like
the type of guy
228
00:15:32,793 --> 00:15:34,102
to wish for an elephant sized dong
229
00:15:34,103 --> 00:15:35,757
or a house made of candy.
230
00:15:59,517 --> 00:16:02,481
What kind of psychopath
would do something like this?
231
00:16:02,482 --> 00:16:05,343
Well, well, well...
232
00:16:05,344 --> 00:16:07,964
If it isn't the popular girls.
233
00:16:07,965 --> 00:16:10,619
God, I almost shit my fucking shorts.
234
00:16:10,620 --> 00:16:11,964
Surprised?
235
00:16:11,965 --> 00:16:14,481
I guess I'm not as prim and proper
236
00:16:14,482 --> 00:16:15,724
as you thought I was.
237
00:16:18,206 --> 00:16:19,723
Well, it looks like
you got this covered.
238
00:16:19,724 --> 00:16:20,964
Yeah. we're going to go snuff out
239
00:16:20,965 --> 00:16:22,033
the rest of these fuckers.
240
00:16:22,034 --> 00:16:23,551
Uh, w-w-wait. I...
241
00:16:25,517 --> 00:16:27,034
Oh, I just was gonna say...
242
00:16:27,689 --> 00:16:28,965
...good luck...
243
00:16:29,172 --> 00:16:30,896
...with wherever you're going.
244
00:16:31,310 --> 00:16:32,964
I'll just...
245
00:16:32,965 --> 00:16:34,655
I'll just be here.
246
00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:37,448
By myself.
247
00:16:38,655 --> 00:16:40,550
Well, not by myself.
248
00:16:40,551 --> 00:16:43,000
With you, of course, but...
249
00:16:48,482 --> 00:16:50,310
Do you want to come with us?
250
00:16:51,896 --> 00:16:53,481
Looks like these worker ants
251
00:16:53,482 --> 00:16:55,448
just became a colony.
252
00:16:56,827 --> 00:17:00,481
Girls night!
253
00:17:00,482 --> 00:17:02,240
Oh, we can braid each other's hair.
254
00:17:02,241 --> 00:17:03,550
We can have a slumber party. We can...
255
00:17:03,551 --> 00:17:05,688
Shh!
256
00:17:09,586 --> 00:17:12,102
We need weapons.
257
00:17:12,103 --> 00:17:13,999
Shit, Looks like someone
took all the good stuff.
258
00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:15,550
Well, no duh.
259
00:17:15,551 --> 00:17:17,033
Well, no duh.
260
00:17:17,034 --> 00:17:18,378
Quit playing around.
261
00:17:18,379 --> 00:17:19,516
I'm trying to figure out
a way out of this.
262
00:17:19,517 --> 00:17:21,033
Don't hurt yourself.
263
00:17:21,034 --> 00:17:23,240
I've been surviving out here
since I was a kid.
264
00:17:23,241 --> 00:17:24,412
I know what I'm doing.
265
00:17:24,413 --> 00:17:25,999
Oh, yeah? How old were you?
266
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:27,965
- Twelve.
- Seven.
267
00:17:29,137 --> 00:17:31,378
Well, it was the start
of the apocalypse,
268
00:17:31,379 --> 00:17:33,067
when shit was really hard.
269
00:17:33,068 --> 00:17:35,585
Oh, yeah, I bet it was so hard
270
00:17:35,586 --> 00:17:37,999
to have tons of supplies
and food to loot.
271
00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:39,240
Everything was picked over
272
00:17:39,241 --> 00:17:40,413
by the time my generation got to them.
273
00:17:40,758 --> 00:17:42,619
So you want everything handed to you?
274
00:17:42,620 --> 00:17:45,757
When I was a kid, you had
to get a car and go find it.
275
00:17:45,758 --> 00:17:48,171
A car? What car? None of them were left
276
00:17:48,172 --> 00:17:50,723
after the old timers like you
took them all.
277
00:17:50,724 --> 00:17:53,033
God, I bet back in your day
you could just trip, fall,
278
00:17:53,034 --> 00:17:54,379
and smack your head into a car.
279
00:17:55,931 --> 00:17:57,723
No. Yeah, well,
280
00:17:57,724 --> 00:17:59,068
you should have joined
a group or something.
281
00:18:01,310 --> 00:18:02,309
Well, no duh.
282
00:18:02,310 --> 00:18:04,343
You don't think that I tried?
283
00:18:04,344 --> 00:18:06,102
Everyone that I found out there
284
00:18:06,103 --> 00:18:08,067
was a weirdo sex pest or a lunatic.
285
00:18:08,068 --> 00:18:10,931
I never found people
who wanted me around...
286
00:18:11,827 --> 00:18:12,827
...who actually got me.
287
00:18:15,793 --> 00:18:17,000
Yeah, I know that feeling.
288
00:18:19,482 --> 00:18:20,723
All right, come on.
289
00:18:20,724 --> 00:18:22,000
What happened between you guys?
290
00:18:24,310 --> 00:18:26,310
We got in a fight, a big one.
291
00:18:28,344 --> 00:18:29,550
She told me...
292
00:18:29,551 --> 00:18:31,792
...she couldn't stand the sight of me.
293
00:18:31,793 --> 00:18:33,068
So?
294
00:18:34,310 --> 00:18:36,068
So I left.
295
00:18:36,379 --> 00:18:38,550
So you took the easy way out.
296
00:18:38,551 --> 00:18:39,896
Classic bitch move.
297
00:18:44,517 --> 00:18:48,000
So, do you have any ideas?
298
00:18:49,068 --> 00:18:50,241
One.
299
00:18:55,413 --> 00:18:57,309
Good haul today.
300
00:18:57,310 --> 00:18:58,619
Save me the heads.
301
00:18:58,620 --> 00:19:00,379
I like to suck the eyes.
302
00:19:03,551 --> 00:19:05,516
What the hell?
303
00:19:05,517 --> 00:19:06,861
Let me try.
304
00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:11,550
It's locked!
305
00:19:11,551 --> 00:19:14,171
We noticed.
306
00:19:14,172 --> 00:19:16,000
Where the hell did they come from?
307
00:19:17,931 --> 00:19:19,550
Hello?
308
00:19:19,551 --> 00:19:23,999
Holy shit, these guys are fast!
309
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:26,000
Where the fuck is everybody?
310
00:19:26,827 --> 00:19:28,861
Look, man, I know
311
00:19:28,862 --> 00:19:30,689
that talking about the past isn't easy,
312
00:19:31,689 --> 00:19:33,033
but we don't judge.
313
00:19:33,034 --> 00:19:34,412
This is a safe space.
314
00:19:36,413 --> 00:19:39,481
Uh, I feel like this is
actually a dangerous space.
315
00:19:39,482 --> 00:19:40,930
Do we really have time for this?
316
00:19:40,931 --> 00:19:42,654
One of those vents
probably leads to the garage
317
00:19:42,655 --> 00:19:44,965
- where the gas is.
- Hey, Stu,
318
00:19:45,206 --> 00:19:47,551
trust the process.
319
00:19:49,827 --> 00:19:51,378
- Yeah.
- Go ahead, Axel.
320
00:19:54,517 --> 00:19:56,827
My life started out fine enough.
321
00:19:58,241 --> 00:19:59,861
But things got hard after my daddy left.
322
00:19:59,862 --> 00:20:01,551
- Yeah. That's tough.
- It's okay.
323
00:20:01,896 --> 00:20:03,723
If I'm being honest,
losing my wife was harder.
324
00:20:03,724 --> 00:20:05,033
Goddamn.
325
00:20:05,034 --> 00:20:06,826
She cheated on me with my dad.
326
00:20:06,827 --> 00:20:10,034
- Wow. Wow.
- Well, I'm sure...
327
00:20:10,344 --> 00:20:12,654
Karma came for those two.
328
00:20:12,655 --> 00:20:13,862
It didn't.
329
00:20:14,689 --> 00:20:17,171
They got married and moved to Napa.
330
00:20:17,172 --> 00:20:19,724
Me? I stayed in Louisiana.
331
00:20:20,137 --> 00:20:21,965
Work was hard to come by.
332
00:20:22,655 --> 00:20:25,343
I took on a lot of debt
from the wrong people.
333
00:20:25,344 --> 00:20:26,826
So you start drinking gas?
334
00:20:26,827 --> 00:20:29,826
No. I had to work off what I owed.
335
00:20:29,827 --> 00:20:32,586
- Oh.
- By killing.
336
00:20:33,034 --> 00:20:34,034
Oh.
337
00:20:34,379 --> 00:20:36,792
And one day I got a job.
338
00:20:36,793 --> 00:20:37,861
It's the usual assignment.
339
00:20:37,862 --> 00:20:39,551
Eliminate everyone.
340
00:20:42,793 --> 00:20:44,896
But they forgot to mention one thing.
341
00:20:46,689 --> 00:20:47,758
A baby.
342
00:20:50,344 --> 00:20:51,895
So you're haunted by killing a baby?
343
00:20:51,896 --> 00:20:53,482
Bitch, I didn't kill no baby.
344
00:20:53,931 --> 00:20:56,206
- I'd never kill a kid.
- Of course not.
345
00:20:56,586 --> 00:20:58,412
I got the child out of there,
346
00:20:58,413 --> 00:21:00,171
and we went on the run.
347
00:21:00,172 --> 00:21:01,654
For a long time
348
00:21:01,655 --> 00:21:03,517
it was just the two of us on the road.
349
00:21:07,655 --> 00:21:09,241
Those were good days.
350
00:21:11,137 --> 00:21:13,412
Some of the best in my life.
351
00:21:13,413 --> 00:21:16,413
Dude, I mean, you did
save the kid, right?
352
00:21:16,655 --> 00:21:18,965
You should be proud
of yourself, brother.
353
00:21:19,620 --> 00:21:20,965
One day...
354
00:21:23,137 --> 00:21:25,274
...vultures raided my camp.
355
00:21:25,275 --> 00:21:28,103
I fought as hard as I could,
but they knocked me out.
356
00:21:30,689 --> 00:21:34,309
The last thing I remember
is that baby screaming.
357
00:21:38,793 --> 00:21:40,793
When I came to, the kid was gone.
358
00:21:45,724 --> 00:21:47,655
So I went looking for her.
359
00:21:48,758 --> 00:21:51,172
Then I met this scientist, Zemu.
360
00:21:54,482 --> 00:21:56,241
He said he'd help me find her.
361
00:21:56,758 --> 00:22:00,861
Instead, he trapped me, tortured me,
362
00:22:00,862 --> 00:22:02,344
did experiments.
363
00:22:05,068 --> 00:22:06,620
He took away my hands.
364
00:22:09,241 --> 00:22:10,551
Put me in the wheels.
365
00:22:13,068 --> 00:22:14,896
And that's when the gas came in.
366
00:22:15,586 --> 00:22:17,550
That's when you started
drinking the gas.
367
00:22:17,551 --> 00:22:20,033
All I had were my wheels
and that gas can,
368
00:22:20,034 --> 00:22:21,343
so if we get it,
369
00:22:21,344 --> 00:22:23,000
I have to try to take it
straight to the dome.
370
00:22:23,310 --> 00:22:25,792
Look, guys, I know what's going on here.
371
00:22:25,793 --> 00:22:29,067
You think the gas controls you.
372
00:22:29,068 --> 00:22:31,481
Right, but you were murdering people
373
00:22:31,482 --> 00:22:33,205
before the gas.
374
00:22:33,206 --> 00:22:36,171
Look, man, on the real,
I used to eat human flesh.
375
00:22:36,172 --> 00:22:37,688
It's fucking gross,
376
00:22:37,689 --> 00:22:39,688
and it turned me
into a different person.
377
00:22:39,689 --> 00:22:42,033
But eventually,
I learned to forgive myself
378
00:22:42,034 --> 00:22:43,862
and I moved the fuck on
379
00:22:44,206 --> 00:22:46,517
with a little help from a friend.
380
00:22:49,965 --> 00:22:51,999
It's easy for you to say.
381
00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:54,000
It's just me and my wheels.
382
00:22:59,931 --> 00:23:02,585
Then lean on us.
You're not alone anymore.
383
00:23:02,586 --> 00:23:05,309
We believe in you
even if you don't right now.
384
00:23:05,310 --> 00:23:07,205
We know that you could murder anyone
385
00:23:07,206 --> 00:23:08,619
if you put your mind to murdering,
386
00:23:08,620 --> 00:23:10,447
stone-cold sobes.
387
00:23:10,448 --> 00:23:11,723
I couldn't have said it better.
388
00:23:11,724 --> 00:23:13,516
Beautiful stuff, Stu.
389
00:23:13,517 --> 00:23:15,448
Oh, shit!
390
00:23:24,137 --> 00:23:26,033
You want Axel?
391
00:23:26,034 --> 00:23:28,310
Here I am, motherfuckers!
392
00:23:33,379 --> 00:23:36,964
Axel! Axel!
393
00:23:36,965 --> 00:23:40,792
Axel! Axel! Axel! Axel!
394
00:23:40,793 --> 00:23:42,310
Axel! Axel!
395
00:23:49,275 --> 00:23:51,102
So he wished for
his sister to come back?
396
00:23:51,103 --> 00:23:52,826
How is that selfish, exactly?
397
00:23:52,827 --> 00:23:54,481
Yeah. It's not like he wished for, like,
398
00:23:54,482 --> 00:23:55,895
a bug body or beetle wings,
399
00:23:55,896 --> 00:23:57,447
or, like, a bigger dick or something.
400
00:23:57,448 --> 00:23:59,136
Fine. What he wished for
401
00:23:59,137 --> 00:24:00,895
wasn't exactly selfish,
402
00:24:00,896 --> 00:24:02,205
but he still risked the mission.
403
00:24:02,206 --> 00:24:04,033
He risked your mission.
404
00:24:04,034 --> 00:24:06,102
Guess he thought saving
one person was more important.
405
00:24:06,103 --> 00:24:08,171
- I agree.
- That doesn't change the fact
406
00:24:08,172 --> 00:24:09,895
that he kept it a secret from me.
407
00:24:09,896 --> 00:24:11,343
We're supposed
to have each other's backs.
408
00:24:11,344 --> 00:24:13,757
Are you really that fucking dense?
409
00:24:13,758 --> 00:24:15,205
Do you know how many times John tried
410
00:24:15,206 --> 00:24:17,343
to escape my city to get back to you?
411
00:24:17,344 --> 00:24:18,896
Fifteen times!
412
00:24:19,241 --> 00:24:21,516
The dumb ass even cracked his head open
413
00:24:21,517 --> 00:24:23,655
falling from a hang glider
made of pizza boxes.
414
00:24:24,034 --> 00:24:25,689
He's not a thinker.
415
00:24:25,896 --> 00:24:27,827
God, you two morons
are made for each other.
416
00:24:32,206 --> 00:24:34,723
Excuse me. Here comes the boot!
417
00:24:38,793 --> 00:24:40,964
Did I ever tell you girlies
about Ronald?
418
00:24:40,965 --> 00:24:43,447
Ronald Hinkley.
He was the love of my life...
419
00:24:43,448 --> 00:24:44,688
No.
420
00:24:44,689 --> 00:24:46,516
He had a shiny little ponytail,
421
00:24:46,517 --> 00:24:49,550
and he was a soprano
in the ninth grade choir.
422
00:24:49,551 --> 00:24:53,309
Oh, yeah. I used to get such
a snail trail when he'd sing.
423
00:24:53,310 --> 00:24:56,343
♪ Ave Maria
424
00:24:56,344 --> 00:24:57,517
No one cares!
425
00:25:01,034 --> 00:25:03,274
One summer, he was at Camp Finch,
426
00:25:03,275 --> 00:25:05,723
and I was all the way
427
00:25:05,724 --> 00:25:07,688
a mile away
428
00:25:07,689 --> 00:25:09,724
at Camp Schodack.
429
00:25:10,620 --> 00:25:12,241
So you know what we did?
430
00:25:13,620 --> 00:25:15,895
We snuck out at night
431
00:25:15,896 --> 00:25:17,482
so that we could see each other.
432
00:25:20,310 --> 00:25:22,033
We made it work.
433
00:25:22,034 --> 00:25:23,379
You know why?
434
00:25:23,689 --> 00:25:25,827
Because despite our differences,
435
00:25:27,275 --> 00:25:28,586
we were in love.
436
00:25:31,758 --> 00:25:33,067
What happened to Ronald?
437
00:25:33,068 --> 00:25:35,241
Oh, I dumped his ass
when he wouldn't put out.
438
00:25:35,551 --> 00:25:37,930
You girls know what
I'm talking about, huh?
439
00:25:37,931 --> 00:25:39,447
There's only so much
second base you can do
440
00:25:39,448 --> 00:25:42,000
before you need to slide into home.
441
00:25:42,724 --> 00:25:44,586
Shit.
442
00:25:44,965 --> 00:25:46,482
Do you guys think that was John?
443
00:25:48,275 --> 00:25:49,757
I mean, it might have been Stu.
444
00:25:49,758 --> 00:25:51,102
I don't know. Should we go check?
445
00:25:51,103 --> 00:25:52,136
Ugh.
446
00:25:52,137 --> 00:25:54,240
"Should we go check?"
447
00:25:54,241 --> 00:25:56,655
Maybe we should go check. Let's go.
448
00:26:36,482 --> 00:26:37,586
Surprise, motherfucker!
449
00:26:49,206 --> 00:26:50,447
Oh, no, no, no!
450
00:26:59,655 --> 00:27:01,068
Mayhem, now!
451
00:27:13,827 --> 00:27:16,379
Damn it.
452
00:27:16,896 --> 00:27:18,033
I think he pissed his pants.
453
00:27:18,034 --> 00:27:19,516
- You good?
- Yeah.
454
00:27:19,517 --> 00:27:21,275
Yeah, why? Did I get some on me?
455
00:27:24,931 --> 00:27:26,412
Holy shit, that was crazy.
456
00:27:26,413 --> 00:27:27,585
How did you come up with that?
457
00:27:27,586 --> 00:27:29,343
I hid out in a Blockbuster for a month,
458
00:27:29,344 --> 00:27:31,378
survived off nothing but
stale candy and horror movies.
459
00:27:31,379 --> 00:27:32,723
Horror movies?
460
00:27:32,724 --> 00:27:34,343
Hell, no. That's too scary.
461
00:27:34,344 --> 00:27:35,895
Oh, pussy.
462
00:27:35,896 --> 00:27:37,240
Come on. Horror movies are great.
463
00:27:37,241 --> 00:27:39,412
Although I refuse to watch
Deep Blue Sea.
464
00:27:39,413 --> 00:27:41,067
I do not fuck with the ocean
465
00:27:41,068 --> 00:27:42,205
or the shit that lives in it.
466
00:27:42,206 --> 00:27:43,723
Way too scary.
467
00:27:43,724 --> 00:27:45,688
Finally, someone understands
that the ocean sucks!
468
00:27:47,862 --> 00:27:49,586
Oh, shit.
469
00:27:51,931 --> 00:27:53,033
Don't worry about it.
470
00:27:53,034 --> 00:27:54,516
The way we took that guy down,
471
00:27:54,517 --> 00:27:56,448
if we stick together, we can...
472
00:27:57,172 --> 00:27:58,344
Shit!
473
00:28:01,827 --> 00:28:03,412
- John!
- Quiet.
474
00:28:03,413 --> 00:28:05,067
Thank God you're alive.
475
00:28:05,068 --> 00:28:06,482
Well, I mean, don't jinx it.
476
00:28:16,655 --> 00:28:18,964
Out of my way!
477
00:28:18,965 --> 00:28:20,103
I got this.
478
00:28:30,137 --> 00:28:34,895
♪ Once there was This kid who ♪
479
00:28:34,896 --> 00:28:39,792
♪ Got into an accident
And couldn't come to school ♪
480
00:28:39,793 --> 00:28:45,619
♪ But when He finally came back ♪
481
00:28:45,620 --> 00:28:51,654
♪ His hair had turned from
Black into bright white ♪
482
00:28:54,413 --> 00:28:56,758
♪ He said that It was from when ♪
483
00:28:57,000 --> 00:29:03,205
♪ The cars had smashed So hard ♪
484
00:29:03,206 --> 00:29:08,724
♪ Mmm mmm mmm mmm Mmm mmm mmm mmm ♪
485
00:29:13,551 --> 00:29:18,654
♪ Mmm mmm mmm mmm Mmm mmm mmm mmm ♪
486
00:29:18,655 --> 00:29:20,757
Thank god he's on our side.
487
00:29:20,758 --> 00:29:21,826
Yeah, for now.
488
00:29:21,827 --> 00:29:23,205
I did it.
489
00:29:23,206 --> 00:29:25,033
I killed without the gas.
490
00:29:25,034 --> 00:29:26,274
You did so good, bro.
491
00:29:26,275 --> 00:29:28,861
Hey, you slaughtered those twelve steps.
492
00:29:28,862 --> 00:29:31,241
Awesome. Awesome stuff, Axel.
493
00:29:32,724 --> 00:29:33,826
Uh, real talk,
494
00:29:33,827 --> 00:29:36,481
I don't know if taking away
this guy's one weakness
495
00:29:36,482 --> 00:29:37,999
was the best idea.
496
00:29:38,000 --> 00:29:40,999
Stu! Oh, there you are.
497
00:29:41,000 --> 00:29:43,654
I don't know about you,
but I have had quite the day.
498
00:29:43,655 --> 00:29:45,067
Long story short,
499
00:29:45,068 --> 00:29:46,999
the doctor said my nuts are broken,
500
00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:49,205
so I won't be shitting out
a baby anytime soon.
501
00:29:49,206 --> 00:29:51,861
And it made me think
and reevaluate my life,
502
00:29:51,862 --> 00:29:53,344
what I want.
503
00:29:54,103 --> 00:29:56,517
I'm adopting you, son.
504
00:29:57,000 --> 00:29:59,826
Oh, wow. Uh, what?
505
00:29:59,827 --> 00:30:02,310
All right, squirt.
506
00:30:03,034 --> 00:30:06,034
Not too old to play catch
with your old man, are you?
507
00:30:06,482 --> 00:30:08,378
- Ugh.
- Come on, champ.
508
00:30:08,379 --> 00:30:10,033
Got to keep your eye on the head.
509
00:30:12,344 --> 00:30:13,723
Congratulations,
510
00:30:13,724 --> 00:30:16,999
my friends, to those who survived.
511
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:19,689
The Apocalypse Nine have been defeated.
512
00:30:19,896 --> 00:30:22,034
You work well as a team.
513
00:30:22,379 --> 00:30:24,792
Too bad, because next round
514
00:30:24,793 --> 00:30:26,724
is every man for himself.
515
00:30:44,206 --> 00:30:45,206
Can we talk?
516
00:30:47,689 --> 00:30:48,793
Yeah.
517
00:30:49,724 --> 00:30:51,034
Quiet,
518
00:30:52,034 --> 00:30:53,620
I'm sorry.
519
00:30:55,275 --> 00:30:57,068
I messed up real bad.
520
00:30:59,137 --> 00:31:00,861
You did.
521
00:31:00,862 --> 00:31:03,758
I made a snap decision, and I regret it.
522
00:31:14,379 --> 00:31:15,274
When Krista died,
523
00:31:15,275 --> 00:31:18,482
we didn't really have time
to process it.
524
00:31:21,275 --> 00:31:22,758
I'm sorry for that.
525
00:31:27,103 --> 00:31:28,827
It just happened so fast.
526
00:31:32,241 --> 00:31:34,103
If you ever want to talk about her,
527
00:31:35,413 --> 00:31:36,413
just ask.
528
00:31:40,965 --> 00:31:42,448
I think you should have it.
529
00:31:49,137 --> 00:31:50,137
Thanks.
530
00:31:56,103 --> 00:31:58,102
Come on.
531
00:31:58,103 --> 00:31:59,275
We can fix this.
532
00:32:16,206 --> 00:32:17,310
What the hell?
36660
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