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1
00:00:01,600 --> 00:00:02,633
MR WADE: Are you
in love with her?
2
00:00:02,767 --> 00:00:05,733
RUDY: Whoa, no.
Shut up, Dad.
3
00:00:05,867 --> 00:00:09,000
-What?
-No, I either go as me
or I'm not going at all.
4
00:00:09,133 --> 00:00:11,167
No! Fuck off! Moron.
5
00:00:11,300 --> 00:00:13,367
You can't... You can't deny
me forever, you know.
6
00:00:13,500 --> 00:00:15,433
Well, denied, mate!
7
00:00:16,700 --> 00:00:18,533
Since the lung transplant,
I've got the power
8
00:00:18,667 --> 00:00:21,000
to fuck powers out of people.
9
00:00:21,133 --> 00:00:22,933
(SCREAMING)
10
00:00:27,900 --> 00:00:30,700
Whoa! I need to talk to you.
11
00:00:32,300 --> 00:00:33,800
It's about a jumper!
12
00:00:48,567 --> 00:00:49,567
(GRUNTING)
13
00:00:54,700 --> 00:00:55,733
Morning, Finlay!
14
00:01:07,533 --> 00:01:08,867
Oh, come on!
15
00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:14,567
That's... That's fucking it.
16
00:01:17,533 --> 00:01:19,300
RUDY ONE: He's fucked off.
He's left me.
17
00:01:20,433 --> 00:01:22,567
Rudy Two's buggered off
and left me.
18
00:01:22,700 --> 00:01:24,200
-Where's he gone?
-Shit, I don't know.
19
00:01:24,333 --> 00:01:25,500
He's been gone
a couple of days now.
20
00:01:25,633 --> 00:01:27,200
I thought maybe
he'd come back in the night
21
00:01:27,333 --> 00:01:29,133
but he's not done it.
He's never been out
of me this long before.
22
00:01:29,267 --> 00:01:31,100
Are they my trousers?
23
00:01:31,233 --> 00:01:33,133
Yeah, shit, I'm sorry,
I was going to ask if
I could borrow some clothes
24
00:01:33,267 --> 00:01:34,833
because I've run out!
25
00:01:34,967 --> 00:01:37,300
-What are you going to do?
-Fuck, I'm not gonna
do nothing.
26
00:01:37,433 --> 00:01:40,600
If he wants go off
and do his own thing,
that's his decision.
27
00:01:40,733 --> 00:01:43,933
Good riddance, that's what
I say. Friggin' free at last.
28
00:01:44,067 --> 00:01:47,100
-Thank fuck almighty,
I'm free at last.
-Don't...
29
00:01:47,233 --> 00:01:48,800
-(GROANING)
-Stop it!
30
00:01:48,933 --> 00:01:50,367
(THEME SONG PLAYING)
31
00:02:02,133 --> 00:02:05,667
# The city breathing
The people churning
32
00:02:05,800 --> 00:02:09,067
# The conversating
The price is what?
33
00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:27,133
# The conversating
This place is heaven
34
00:02:27,267 --> 00:02:29,067
# And if you see them
They're saying what? #
35
00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:33,600
David Simmonds, right? Now,
he was a kid at our school,
he had a tail.
36
00:02:33,733 --> 00:02:37,100
It was like a useless flap
of skin at the base
of his spine.
37
00:02:37,233 --> 00:02:40,967
And one day he had
the bloody tail removed.
38
00:02:41,100 --> 00:02:42,633
And now I know
how he feels.
39
00:02:42,767 --> 00:02:44,467
To losing your tail, guys,
let's get them in there.
40
00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:46,167
But he was part of the gang.
41
00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:49,333
-For fuck's sake!
-He was Scrappy-Doo
to your Scooby.
42
00:02:49,467 --> 00:02:51,433
You're Shaggy. Obviously.
43
00:02:51,567 --> 00:02:53,100
Um, which one am I?
44
00:02:53,233 --> 00:02:54,233
Velma.
45
00:02:54,367 --> 00:02:55,500
-Velma?
-Mmm-hmm.
46
00:02:55,633 --> 00:02:57,900
With the glasses? Fuck off.
47
00:02:58,067 --> 00:03:02,067
-What if he's killed himself?
-Why the fuck would he have
killed himself, then?
48
00:03:02,133 --> 00:03:05,533
He didn't mean to.
Satsuma in the mouth,
dog collar on.
49
00:03:05,667 --> 00:03:07,500
Bit tighter,
bit tighter...
50
00:03:07,633 --> 00:03:09,200
For fuck's sake!
51
00:03:09,333 --> 00:03:12,367
I'll piss off
and I'll friggin' celebrate
by meself, shall I?
52
00:03:13,067 --> 00:03:14,067
Fuck you!
53
00:03:15,333 --> 00:03:16,433
Fuck you!
54
00:03:17,167 --> 00:03:18,167
Fuck you.
55
00:03:19,367 --> 00:03:20,667
Have a nice evening.
56
00:03:32,433 --> 00:03:34,433
That is a really pale ass.
57
00:03:38,400 --> 00:03:39,500
(ALL GROANING)
58
00:03:40,300 --> 00:03:42,533
What the fuck, guys?
59
00:03:44,500 --> 00:03:45,733
Ow.
60
00:03:45,867 --> 00:03:48,100
For Christ sake,
why am I not in bed?
61
00:03:49,367 --> 00:03:51,833
-Morning.
-Morning!
(CLEARS THROAT)
62
00:03:51,967 --> 00:03:53,767
This is Rudy Two's fault.
63
00:03:53,900 --> 00:03:56,967
I cannot be expected
to look after meself.
64
00:03:57,100 --> 00:04:00,767
I've only just worked out
those screw top lids
on them Aspirin bottles.
65
00:04:00,900 --> 00:04:03,667
How about you just put
some pants on first and
then we'll talk about it?
66
00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:06,967
Man, running out of bog-roll
is one fucking thing.
67
00:04:07,100 --> 00:04:09,333
This is bang out of order.
68
00:04:15,133 --> 00:04:16,867
It makes my blood boil.
69
00:04:17,067 --> 00:04:20,433
I mean, there's a municipal
recycling facility two minutes
down the road.
70
00:04:21,467 --> 00:04:23,067
It's just scum.
71
00:04:23,167 --> 00:04:25,233
Sick, inhuman scum.
72
00:04:25,367 --> 00:04:26,467
We kill people.
73
00:04:28,367 --> 00:04:29,367
Frequently.
74
00:04:30,700 --> 00:04:31,867
Yeah.
75
00:04:32,067 --> 00:04:33,900
Well, there's honour
in killing people.
76
00:04:34,067 --> 00:04:35,667
There's no honour
in fly-tipping, is there?
77
00:04:50,600 --> 00:04:51,567
Hey!
78
00:04:52,700 --> 00:04:53,700
Check this guy out.
79
00:04:57,733 --> 00:04:59,400
RUDY: Is he all right?
80
00:04:59,533 --> 00:05:01,267
You all right, mate?
How you doing?
81
00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:03,300
Oh, he looks
friendly, doesn't he?
82
00:05:03,433 --> 00:05:04,733
How you doing?
You all right, mate?
83
00:05:04,867 --> 00:05:06,767
Oh, shit, he's a bit huggy.
84
00:05:06,900 --> 00:05:09,067
Two sugars.
Milk and two sugars.
85
00:05:09,200 --> 00:05:12,867
Milk and two sugars,
get the man a cup of tea
immediately, before...
86
00:05:16,333 --> 00:05:18,567
Oh, my fucking God!
87
00:05:20,133 --> 00:05:22,333
It's him! It's Rudy Two!
88
00:05:25,300 --> 00:05:28,133
Where have you been you?
Who's done this to you?
89
00:05:31,100 --> 00:05:32,867
Are we absolutely sure
that it's him?
90
00:05:33,067 --> 00:05:35,133
Dude, are you fucking
kidding me, man? Look!
91
00:05:38,267 --> 00:05:40,300
He's got to be about 80.
Maybe even more.
92
00:05:43,133 --> 00:05:45,533
Do you remember
what happened to you?
93
00:05:46,633 --> 00:05:47,633
Oh!
94
00:05:48,833 --> 00:05:50,500
-It's you.
-Yeah.
95
00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:52,667
I always liked you.
96
00:05:55,100 --> 00:05:56,667
It's raining.
97
00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:58,267
Your hair's so pretty
98
00:05:59,233 --> 00:06:00,567
when it's wet.
99
00:06:02,100 --> 00:06:05,267
Jesus Christ. The man's
a fucking vegetable.
100
00:06:05,400 --> 00:06:06,467
I tell you what's
happened here.
101
00:06:07,433 --> 00:06:08,433
The storm.
102
00:06:09,833 --> 00:06:12,667
This will be something
to do with the storm.
103
00:06:12,800 --> 00:06:14,367
-Really?
-Yeah.
104
00:06:14,500 --> 00:06:15,833
ALEX: You think so?
FINN: Mmm-hmm.
105
00:06:15,967 --> 00:06:18,767
Well, thanks for
the heads-up, Miss Marple.
106
00:06:18,900 --> 00:06:22,833
Maybe it's something to do
with that superpower support
group he's been going to.
107
00:06:25,567 --> 00:06:27,700
RUDY ONE: So what does
he need with
a support group anyway?
108
00:06:27,833 --> 00:06:30,067
Talking about your feelings,
that's the first
sign of weakness.
109
00:06:30,167 --> 00:06:31,600
You want to bottle that
stuff up inside you,
110
00:06:31,733 --> 00:06:33,767
until it becomes one solid
mass of anger and resentment.
111
00:06:33,900 --> 00:06:35,167
That's what me
uncle Peter did.
112
00:06:35,300 --> 00:06:37,067
(MOBILE RINGING)
113
00:06:37,167 --> 00:06:39,833
Admittedly, he drank himself
to death, but that's
not the point.
114
00:06:39,967 --> 00:06:42,233
-Hello?
-He's hungry.
115
00:06:42,367 --> 00:06:46,067
Gammon and an egg
and fish and...
116
00:06:47,400 --> 00:06:49,067
He wants gammon.
117
00:06:49,133 --> 00:06:51,300
Well, I don't know,
get him some from
a vending machine.
118
00:06:51,433 --> 00:06:54,067
Okay, hurry up.
You need to be the one
dealing with this, not me.
119
00:06:55,067 --> 00:06:56,300
Ugh.
120
00:06:56,433 --> 00:06:58,967
-Guys, this is it.
-Right.
121
00:06:59,100 --> 00:07:00,267
What's the plan?
122
00:07:00,400 --> 00:07:04,667
The plan is we go in
there and we ask them
123
00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:08,767
which one turned Rudy Two
into an old man.
124
00:07:08,900 --> 00:07:10,633
-Shit plan.
-Is it?
125
00:07:10,767 --> 00:07:13,433
If Rudy Two's a regular at
this group, they're going
to think you're him.
126
00:07:14,067 --> 00:07:15,833
Go undercover.
127
00:07:15,967 --> 00:07:18,167
Pretend to be him
and whoever did it'll
be surprised to see you,
128
00:07:18,300 --> 00:07:19,700
they'll give themselves away.
129
00:07:19,833 --> 00:07:21,333
That is genius.
130
00:07:21,467 --> 00:07:24,067
Here's what I need, right?
I need a beard,
I need some glasses.
131
00:07:24,200 --> 00:07:27,267
I need a pipe, I want a cloak
and give me a staff
of some kind...
132
00:07:27,400 --> 00:07:28,667
You need to look like
Rudy Two,
133
00:07:28,800 --> 00:07:30,667
otherwise they're not
gonna think you're him.
134
00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:34,133
This guy, eight GCSEs.
135
00:07:35,300 --> 00:07:36,567
Let's go undercover.
136
00:07:59,567 --> 00:08:02,100
Rudy Two. How are you doing?
137
00:08:02,233 --> 00:08:05,667
I would imagine you're quite
138
00:08:05,800 --> 00:08:08,233
surprised to see me, guy.
139
00:08:08,367 --> 00:08:10,967
Not really. Um...
You always come on a Tuesday.
140
00:08:11,100 --> 00:08:14,133
Let's just say that
"old" habits die hard?
141
00:08:15,367 --> 00:08:18,467
"Old habits."
142
00:08:18,600 --> 00:08:21,200
-I'm Finn.
-Nice to meet you, hi.
143
00:08:21,333 --> 00:08:23,567
Don't worry about me,
I'm just here
for the biscuits.
144
00:08:23,967 --> 00:08:24,933
She is.
145
00:08:26,100 --> 00:08:27,100
So what's your power?
146
00:08:27,233 --> 00:08:29,067
-Telekinesis.
-Milky nipples.
147
00:08:29,167 --> 00:08:31,167
-Hmm?
-Milky nipples.
148
00:08:31,300 --> 00:08:33,800
'Cause every time he tells
a lie, he just expresses
milk from his nipples.
149
00:08:33,933 --> 00:08:35,767
It's ridiculous, he's very
embarrassed about it.
150
00:08:35,900 --> 00:08:37,133
Now you're going
to have to excuse us
151
00:08:37,267 --> 00:08:38,533
'cause we do have other people
we need to speak to.
152
00:08:39,333 --> 00:08:40,400
Finlay.
153
00:08:43,133 --> 00:08:45,767
What was all that with
the fucking milky nipples?
154
00:08:45,900 --> 00:08:48,633
What was the plan, then?
Can you remember it?
155
00:08:48,767 --> 00:08:53,833
The plan was we don't tell
anyone what our real
powers are.
156
00:08:53,967 --> 00:08:56,333
That was nothing to do
with the plan.
157
00:08:57,767 --> 00:08:59,500
-Was it not?
-No!
158
00:08:59,633 --> 00:09:01,933
Listen to me, dude, seriously,
someone here knows something
about Rudy Two.
159
00:09:02,067 --> 00:09:03,167
I suggest we
just split up.
160
00:09:03,300 --> 00:09:05,167
Yeah, I think we should...
Fuck off!
161
00:09:10,567 --> 00:09:12,167
Why is there a turtle
by the biscuits?
162
00:09:14,933 --> 00:09:17,800
He turns up every week.
It's someone with a power.
163
00:09:21,500 --> 00:09:23,067
There's someone
inside of there?
164
00:09:23,900 --> 00:09:26,100
Yeah. His name's Mark.
165
00:09:30,733 --> 00:09:31,867
All right, mate?
166
00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:35,700
You don't have to
be embarrassed.
167
00:09:38,533 --> 00:09:40,933
About your, um, your power.
168
00:09:42,867 --> 00:09:44,633
How about you?
What's your power?
169
00:09:44,767 --> 00:09:46,100
Me? Ah.
170
00:09:47,300 --> 00:09:49,567
It's, uh, complicated.
171
00:09:49,700 --> 00:09:51,133
I don't really like
to talk about it.
172
00:09:52,733 --> 00:09:54,200
It's all right.
You don't have to
if you don't want to.
173
00:09:54,333 --> 00:09:58,067
The thing is other people
make certain
174
00:09:58,133 --> 00:10:02,833
assumptions about my
(CLEARS THROAT)
sexuality, and...
175
00:10:02,967 --> 00:10:05,300
What, they think you're gay?
176
00:10:07,767 --> 00:10:09,300
Yeah, yeah, I guess they do.
177
00:10:12,600 --> 00:10:13,600
And...
178
00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:15,600
Are you gay?
179
00:10:16,767 --> 00:10:17,733
No!
180
00:10:22,100 --> 00:10:23,100
(SIGHS)
181
00:10:29,167 --> 00:10:30,267
Now you know.
182
00:10:31,267 --> 00:10:32,667
Fuck off!
183
00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:36,133
You're... You're literally
trapped in the closet?
184
00:10:36,267 --> 00:10:37,800
(CHUCKLES) How funny is that?
185
00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:42,333
And also very serious
186
00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:45,367
and quietly poignant.
187
00:10:46,833 --> 00:10:47,833
Yeah.
188
00:10:50,733 --> 00:10:54,700
Actually, I've got a
friend who can take powers.
189
00:10:54,833 --> 00:10:57,267
How does he take powers?
How does it work?
190
00:10:57,400 --> 00:11:00,533
I'll let him fill you
in on the details.
191
00:11:00,667 --> 00:11:02,267
Oh, you're gonna love him.
192
00:11:02,400 --> 00:11:05,567
-His name's Alex.
He's on community service.
-Great.
193
00:11:07,133 --> 00:11:09,067
"Miss Marple"? Prick.
194
00:11:10,733 --> 00:11:12,067
-Hey!
-Oh, fucking hell.
195
00:11:17,467 --> 00:11:21,333
That's her. She's old,
he's old. I'm going
undercover, man, this is it.
196
00:11:21,467 --> 00:11:22,567
FINN: (WHISPERING)
Okay, wait.
197
00:11:22,700 --> 00:11:25,267
Okay, everyone's here.
Let's make a start.
198
00:11:25,400 --> 00:11:26,967
FINN: (WHISPERING)
Wait!
199
00:11:27,100 --> 00:11:28,700
-Hi, Rudy Two.
-Yeah.
200
00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:30,700
All right, you.
201
00:11:32,633 --> 00:11:37,200
Um... (SIGHS) Rudy Two.
Last time you were telling us
about Rudy One.
202
00:11:39,067 --> 00:11:40,733
Was I?
203
00:11:40,867 --> 00:11:44,433
(STAMMERING)
I don't...
I don't remember.
204
00:11:44,567 --> 00:11:48,367
Okay, you were telling us
you were embarrassed
by his behaviour.
205
00:11:48,500 --> 00:11:51,600
You feel betrayed that
he hasn't introduced you
to your parents.
206
00:11:51,733 --> 00:11:54,467
Just... Let's just let
someone else have a turn,
shall we, then?
207
00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:55,800
What about him over there?
208
00:11:55,933 --> 00:11:58,233
He looks like he's got
issues, doesn't he?
209
00:11:58,367 --> 00:12:00,167
Um... (CHUCKLES)
210
00:12:00,300 --> 00:12:02,967
You were saying that at times
you're ashamed of him.
211
00:12:03,100 --> 00:12:04,267
That he makes you
feel ashamed.
212
00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:07,733
Just fuckin' move on!
For fuck's sake, man!
213
00:12:22,267 --> 00:12:23,267
(SIGHS)
214
00:12:24,267 --> 00:12:25,800
(LAUGHING)
215
00:12:26,833 --> 00:12:29,067
It melted all over the seats.
216
00:12:30,067 --> 00:12:31,067
Sorry, what did?
217
00:12:32,133 --> 00:12:36,200
Me dad's car
with the leather seats.
218
00:12:36,333 --> 00:12:40,267
We were going to the seaside
and chocolate melted
all over the seats.
219
00:12:41,333 --> 00:12:42,967
But he wasn't angry.
220
00:12:43,100 --> 00:12:45,200
He just bought me another one.
221
00:12:45,333 --> 00:12:48,800
Fuck! What the fuck are you
doing, talking shit about me
behind my fucking back?
222
00:12:48,933 --> 00:12:50,967
You're ashamed?
You're fucking ashamed?
223
00:12:51,100 --> 00:12:53,833
-You fucking shambles.
-What the... Get off him!
224
00:12:53,967 --> 00:12:55,133
-Fucking mug.
-Get off!
225
00:12:56,967 --> 00:12:57,933
(WHISPERING)
For fuck's sake.
226
00:12:58,067 --> 00:13:00,567
You're all right. You're okay.
227
00:13:06,100 --> 00:13:08,067
Come on, dude. This way.
228
00:13:09,500 --> 00:13:10,500
(EXASPERATED SIGH)
229
00:13:11,267 --> 00:13:12,767
What is he wearing?
230
00:13:12,900 --> 00:13:14,967
-What? They're nice
shorts, them.
-JESS: Trainers?
231
00:13:15,100 --> 00:13:16,800
What, is he going
for a kick-about
in the park, is he?
232
00:13:16,933 --> 00:13:19,500
I don't care what he does.
He can do what he wants!
233
00:13:19,633 --> 00:13:22,267
Guys, there's someone
that I'd like you to meet.
234
00:13:25,467 --> 00:13:27,300
(ALL GASPING)
235
00:13:27,433 --> 00:13:28,967
I found him at
the group last night.
236
00:13:30,067 --> 00:13:31,833
There's a person in there.
237
00:13:31,967 --> 00:13:35,100
Sorry, hang on.
You found a turtle
238
00:13:35,233 --> 00:13:37,733
and you just thought that
you'd pick him up
and take him home?
239
00:13:39,067 --> 00:13:41,100
You abducted a turtle.
240
00:13:41,233 --> 00:13:43,167
Well, technically
it's a tortoise.
241
00:13:43,300 --> 00:13:45,067
(FINN CLEARS HIS THROAT)
242
00:13:47,100 --> 00:13:49,900
Guess who followed
the evil old woman home
from the support group
243
00:13:50,067 --> 00:13:51,433
and got her address?
244
00:13:51,567 --> 00:13:53,067
This guy did!
245
00:13:53,200 --> 00:13:56,133
Genius!
The lad's a friggin'...
Eight GCSEs.
246
00:13:56,267 --> 00:13:59,667
English, Maths and French.
247
00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:03,833
-Where's he gone, then?
-Who?
248
00:14:05,067 --> 00:14:06,067
-Shit!
-Oh!
249
00:14:07,067 --> 00:14:09,100
Hey, what were you doing?
250
00:14:09,233 --> 00:14:12,100
Idiot, where you going?
It's this way, you moron.
Oh, Christ.
251
00:14:12,233 --> 00:14:14,133
Who the fuck might this be?
252
00:14:15,300 --> 00:14:17,667
What's the matter?
Cat got your tongue.
253
00:14:18,567 --> 00:14:21,200
(SCREECHING AND GROANING)
254
00:14:24,567 --> 00:14:26,267
Aren't you going
to introduce us?
255
00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:29,067
Shit, I don't know who he is.
He's nothing to do with me.
(SCOFFS)
256
00:14:30,100 --> 00:14:31,367
He's my granddad.
257
00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:37,200
Men like this fought in wars.
Cheek by jowl.
258
00:14:37,333 --> 00:14:40,933
Belly-down, crawling
through the mud, the blood
and the fear and for what?
259
00:14:42,667 --> 00:14:45,700
Boys with hair straighteners.
260
00:14:45,833 --> 00:14:49,267
Girls in jeggings with their
flabby arses hanging out!
261
00:14:52,567 --> 00:14:55,067
It was my very real privilege
to have met you, sir.
262
00:15:02,833 --> 00:15:05,133
You need to step up.
He is your responsibility.
263
00:15:05,267 --> 00:15:08,733
Fine. Fine.
I'll sort it.
264
00:15:09,867 --> 00:15:12,533
Fuck!
265
00:15:12,667 --> 00:15:16,067
All right. Let's just get you
in here. Perfect!
Look at this place.
266
00:15:20,100 --> 00:15:22,833
Let's just get you
sat down there,
there we go.
267
00:15:22,967 --> 00:15:25,867
And what do we have in here?
268
00:15:26,067 --> 00:15:29,533
Look at that.
What a lucky fella.
There you go.
269
00:15:29,667 --> 00:15:30,800
Cornetto, chair.
270
00:15:30,933 --> 00:15:32,433
It's like the frigging
Ritz, in here.
271
00:15:32,567 --> 00:15:34,800
Have fun.
Don't eat it all at once.
272
00:15:34,933 --> 00:15:36,167
See you in a bit.
273
00:15:49,867 --> 00:15:50,900
Are you Alex?
274
00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:55,367
-Your mate said
you'd take my power.
-What mate?
275
00:15:55,500 --> 00:15:59,067
-The mate with
the milky nipples.
-What? Sorry?
276
00:15:59,167 --> 00:16:01,167
-He was short.
-Oh, Finn!
277
00:16:01,300 --> 00:16:03,233
You monkey-faced fuck.
278
00:16:03,367 --> 00:16:05,867
Uh, look. No offence mate,
but I don't really do blokes.
279
00:16:07,233 --> 00:16:08,700
What's that supposed to mean?
280
00:16:08,833 --> 00:16:10,700
It means I'm not into
having sex with men.
281
00:16:10,833 --> 00:16:13,433
-What, you think I'm gay?
-I don't really care
what you are.
282
00:16:13,567 --> 00:16:14,900
I'm not gay!
283
00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:21,833
This is it.
Her name's Maggie.
284
00:16:23,067 --> 00:16:24,933
All right, Maggie.
285
00:16:25,067 --> 00:16:27,067
It's time to pay
the fucking piper, biatch.
286
00:16:28,067 --> 00:16:29,533
Bosh!
287
00:16:29,667 --> 00:16:31,400
What are you doing?
288
00:16:31,533 --> 00:16:33,067
Well, I thought that was
part of the plan.
289
00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:34,800
We could've just knocked.
290
00:16:34,933 --> 00:16:38,167
It's too late to friggin'
knock now, Finlay,
for crying out loud.
291
00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:41,600
Is it too late, to knock?
292
00:16:44,467 --> 00:16:46,300
Shit, I'm just gonna knock,
man, see what she says.
293
00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:49,200
Yoo-hoo?
294
00:16:50,633 --> 00:16:52,067
Here she comes.
What do I say?
295
00:16:52,500 --> 00:16:53,600
Say sorry.
296
00:16:56,067 --> 00:16:57,600
All right, love?
297
00:16:57,733 --> 00:16:59,467
Why did you break my door?
298
00:16:59,600 --> 00:17:00,633
Because I...
299
00:17:02,700 --> 00:17:05,067
I thought you'd fallen over
300
00:17:06,567 --> 00:17:07,667
and broken your hip.
301
00:17:09,700 --> 00:17:12,700
Well, you can fix that lock
when you've helped
me with my jigsaw.
302
00:17:17,367 --> 00:17:18,933
Oh, God.
303
00:17:19,800 --> 00:17:20,900
I have a cat.
304
00:17:22,167 --> 00:17:24,300
She may try to drink
from your nipples.
305
00:17:31,667 --> 00:17:33,600
-FINN: What are you doing?
-Fuck, it won't fit.
306
00:17:33,733 --> 00:17:36,467
We need to find the edges
first and work
from the outside in.
307
00:17:38,400 --> 00:17:41,767
-Basic puzzling.
-It's just a jigsaw, man.
308
00:17:44,600 --> 00:17:46,567
I'm going undercover.
309
00:17:46,700 --> 00:17:48,833
-I'm gonna see
what she knows, yeah?
-Yes.
310
00:17:56,067 --> 00:17:58,800
(SIGHS) So, "Maggie,"
311
00:18:00,867 --> 00:18:06,833
I suppose you're quite
surprised to see me,
aren't you?
312
00:18:06,967 --> 00:18:10,233
It's Wednesday. You always
come Wednesday. Hands.
313
00:18:13,933 --> 00:18:15,533
(EXASPERATED SIGH)
314
00:18:16,633 --> 00:18:19,267
So, how's that awful
Rudy One treating you?
315
00:18:19,400 --> 00:18:21,467
He's not awful, he's just...
316
00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:23,067
He's a bit misunderstood,
that's all.
317
00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:25,567
You should leave him.
I'm sick of telling you.
318
00:18:25,700 --> 00:18:27,267
Maybe he needs me.
319
00:18:27,400 --> 00:18:29,767
Perhaps it's time he learnt
to look after himself.
320
00:18:29,900 --> 00:18:33,133
Well, with all due respect,
perhaps it's time you minded
321
00:18:33,267 --> 00:18:35,833
your own fucking
beeswax, Margaret.
322
00:18:37,433 --> 00:18:40,333
I don't think I care
for your tone today, Rudy Two.
323
00:18:41,533 --> 00:18:44,233
I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have sworn.
324
00:18:44,367 --> 00:18:47,567
Bedroom.
There's a ball of pale pink.
325
00:18:49,067 --> 00:18:50,167
Well, go on.
326
00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:57,133
Yes! All four corners!
327
00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:20,400
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
328
00:19:24,467 --> 00:19:26,800
They all mean something.
329
00:19:26,933 --> 00:19:30,067
Who knows what?
They'll find out eventually.
330
00:19:31,300 --> 00:19:32,733
Who will?
331
00:19:32,867 --> 00:19:34,433
The people on the jumpers.
332
00:19:35,233 --> 00:19:37,733
It's their future.
333
00:19:37,867 --> 00:19:42,367
You'd better be going.
Don't you usually meet up
with Tim on a Wednesday?
334
00:19:42,500 --> 00:19:46,900
Oh, Tim. Of course I do!
Tim, "Tim waits for no
man!" As it t'were.
335
00:19:47,067 --> 00:19:48,233
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
336
00:19:48,367 --> 00:19:51,333
Seriously though,
I've mislaid me old Filofax.
337
00:19:51,467 --> 00:19:53,567
Can't remember.
Where exactly do I meet Tim?
338
00:19:53,700 --> 00:19:55,467
FINN: She knits the future?
339
00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:58,667
It's not exactly your classic
super-power, is it?
340
00:20:02,567 --> 00:20:04,633
I need to talk to you.
341
00:20:04,767 --> 00:20:07,233
Oh.
(CLEARS THROAT)
So.
342
00:20:08,933 --> 00:20:13,800
Tim? I suppose you're quite
surprised to see me.
343
00:20:15,067 --> 00:20:16,067
Give us a minute.
344
00:20:18,667 --> 00:20:21,067
Stay... Where you going?
Stay.
345
00:20:25,467 --> 00:20:27,933
-It happened again.
-Hmm?
346
00:20:28,067 --> 00:20:30,100
I woke up this morning
and I found this.
347
00:20:33,333 --> 00:20:36,000
Oh, for fuck's sake!
(STAMMERING) A fucking gun?
348
00:20:36,133 --> 00:20:39,167
I don't know where it came
from, but it can't be good.
349
00:20:39,300 --> 00:20:40,300
(SIGHS)
350
00:20:40,433 --> 00:20:41,633
Help me.
351
00:20:41,767 --> 00:20:43,833
Just please,
tell me what to do.
352
00:20:47,733 --> 00:20:51,367
All right, instead of me
telling you what I think
you should do,
353
00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:55,633
maybe you should
tell me what you think
you should do, Tim.
354
00:20:58,533 --> 00:20:59,833
I need to snap the band.
355
00:21:04,300 --> 00:21:06,167
Remind myself
that this is real.
356
00:21:08,333 --> 00:21:09,767
That it's not a game.
357
00:21:09,900 --> 00:21:12,633
Cool, when then just snap it.
You snap the band,
358
00:21:12,767 --> 00:21:16,833
remind yourself it's real
and I'll be...
What, then? What, then?
359
00:21:19,367 --> 00:21:21,367
What's the matter, dude?
You're getting
a little bit twitchy.
360
00:21:21,500 --> 00:21:23,867
Let's not get that out,
for fuck's sake.
Put it away.
361
00:21:24,067 --> 00:21:25,400
They'll ring
the fucking police.
362
00:21:25,533 --> 00:21:27,500
No, no, no. Fuck, fuck them.
363
00:21:27,633 --> 00:21:29,933
Don't! Snap the band, dude!
Put it away.
364
00:21:30,067 --> 00:21:32,533
Fucking snap the band.
Snap the fucking band!
365
00:21:32,667 --> 00:21:33,967
Snap the fucking band!
366
00:21:35,700 --> 00:21:38,733
Put the fucking gun
in the bag.
367
00:21:38,867 --> 00:21:42,133
Dude, put the fucking
gun in the bag.
For Christ's sake, Tim, shit!
368
00:21:44,900 --> 00:21:45,867
Thanks.
369
00:21:47,200 --> 00:21:48,267
You're welcome.
370
00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:49,967
You're a good friend.
371
00:21:50,100 --> 00:21:53,600
You're not so bad yourself.
Finlay, dude,
drink that shit up.
372
00:21:53,733 --> 00:21:56,067
Why the fuck does he
help these people
373
00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:58,533
and he doesn't even
go on about it,
he doesn't tell anyone?
374
00:21:58,667 --> 00:22:01,567
Hell, I gave 20 P
to cancer research,
I'm still going on about it.
375
00:22:10,333 --> 00:22:12,367
Are you all right?
376
00:22:12,500 --> 00:22:15,433
-There's something I need
to do. I'll call you later.
-Okay.
377
00:22:19,567 --> 00:22:22,300
Here he is.
The silver fox, where...
378
00:22:23,433 --> 00:22:24,500
Shit.
379
00:22:24,633 --> 00:22:26,900
You locked him
in a fucking cupboard.
380
00:22:27,067 --> 00:22:30,733
Well, technically, that's not
a cupboard, that's the bloody
storeroom, isn't it?
381
00:22:30,867 --> 00:22:32,967
No, this isn't a fucking joke.
382
00:22:33,100 --> 00:22:36,400
It was only five minutes
whilst I was out taking
care of everything. So...
383
00:22:36,533 --> 00:22:38,633
I don't care if it's
for five minutes
while you go for a piss.
384
00:22:38,767 --> 00:22:40,833
All right. Jesus Christ,
I'm fucking sorry, like.
385
00:22:40,967 --> 00:22:41,967
Look at him!
386
00:22:42,933 --> 00:22:44,167
Look at him!
387
00:22:44,300 --> 00:22:46,467
This is not a joke.
388
00:22:46,600 --> 00:22:50,333
This is not some minor
inconvenience to your day.
389
00:22:50,467 --> 00:22:54,467
It's not some random
old man, he's Rudy Two
and he's a part of you.
390
00:22:58,400 --> 00:22:59,400
All right.
391
00:23:01,467 --> 00:23:02,467
Shit.
392
00:23:03,600 --> 00:23:06,267
I'm sorry, man.
I'm shit, I'm sorry.
393
00:23:07,533 --> 00:23:11,167
Oh, it's all right.
Don't be sad.
394
00:23:13,467 --> 00:23:15,167
Oh, I'm tired.
395
00:23:15,300 --> 00:23:17,767
Go and get some bloody
shut-eye. I'll go and get
our dinner.
396
00:23:17,900 --> 00:23:19,433
We'll watch it in
front of the TV, yeah?
397
00:24:15,633 --> 00:24:18,067
It's me. Mr Johnson.
398
00:24:18,167 --> 00:24:21,633
You. You came back.
399
00:24:23,700 --> 00:24:25,400
Look at you.
400
00:24:30,300 --> 00:24:31,800
I didn't mean for it
to happen like this.
401
00:24:34,833 --> 00:24:36,067
I love her.
402
00:24:37,467 --> 00:24:40,067
I've waited my whole
life to feel this way
403
00:24:41,600 --> 00:24:42,700
and now I've got her.
404
00:24:44,200 --> 00:24:46,067
I can't just let her go again.
405
00:24:49,900 --> 00:24:51,067
I'm so sorry.
406
00:24:53,867 --> 00:24:57,067
-Goodbye, Rudy Two.
-Help me. Help me!
407
00:24:57,167 --> 00:25:00,233
Help me! Help me! He's here!
408
00:25:00,367 --> 00:25:01,533
Help me!
409
00:25:01,667 --> 00:25:03,833
Help me!
410
00:25:03,967 --> 00:25:06,500
-Are you all right, mate?
-He was here. He was here.
411
00:25:06,633 --> 00:25:08,733
-He was here! He was here!
-Who was here? Who? Calm down.
412
00:25:08,867 --> 00:25:12,967
-He was here!
-Shh, calm down. Calm down.
Who was in here?
413
00:25:15,333 --> 00:25:19,100
-Me tea. I wanted me tea.
-Oh, Christ.
414
00:25:19,233 --> 00:25:20,400
It's all right, mate,
I'm here now.
415
00:25:29,800 --> 00:25:34,467
Now then, until I can
figure out how to get him
back to normal
416
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:39,533
we're all gonna take turns
helping, so I've drawn out
a simple rota system
417
00:25:39,667 --> 00:25:43,533
-that's colour-coded
and handwritten.
-Laminated. Nice touch.
418
00:25:43,667 --> 00:25:49,233
Thank you.
In here, we have boiled
sweets, they're for you, dude.
419
00:25:49,367 --> 00:25:54,067
TV guide. You'll note
I've ringed all
the relevant programmes.
420
00:25:54,133 --> 00:25:58,133
Diagnosis Murder, snooker,
Cash in the Attic
and Bargain Hunt.
421
00:25:58,267 --> 00:26:03,300
This fine figure of a man
has looked after me more times
than I care to remember.
422
00:26:03,433 --> 00:26:07,067
And I tell you something
else, he'd have done the same
for each and every one of you,
423
00:26:07,167 --> 00:26:08,833
because he's a bloody
good bloke.
424
00:26:10,567 --> 00:26:12,633
Now, we've got a lot to do,
425
00:26:12,767 --> 00:26:15,833
so I think we should
get on it. Let's do this.
Come on, guys.
426
00:26:17,200 --> 00:26:18,633
(MELLOW SKA MUSIC PLAYING)
427
00:26:39,600 --> 00:26:40,600
(SNAPPING)
428
00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:07,067
Um, Alex, will you do me
a quick favour?
429
00:27:09,400 --> 00:27:10,833
Will you fuck my tortoise?
430
00:27:10,967 --> 00:27:14,700
Um, just give me a minute
to think about that.
431
00:27:16,667 --> 00:27:19,533
Actually, I don't need the
full minute. It's a no.
432
00:27:19,667 --> 00:27:22,867
It's a man
and his name's Mark.
433
00:27:23,067 --> 00:27:26,733
-He's trapped in here
and he can't get out.
-That is really tragic.
434
00:27:28,067 --> 00:27:30,533
But I'm still not fucking
your tortoise.
435
00:27:30,667 --> 00:27:32,767
You have no idea, do you?
436
00:27:32,900 --> 00:27:35,067
I found out what my power is
and it's totally useless.
437
00:27:35,167 --> 00:27:37,833
There's nothing I can do
to help anyone.
438
00:27:37,967 --> 00:27:41,067
But you. You can make
a difference.
439
00:27:41,167 --> 00:27:44,633
You're the only one out of us
who can actually change
people's lives.
440
00:27:45,700 --> 00:27:46,800
And what are you
doing about it?
441
00:27:47,633 --> 00:27:49,100
Nothing.
442
00:27:49,233 --> 00:27:51,100
It's just sat there,
in your pants.
443
00:27:52,167 --> 00:27:53,900
Use your power, Alex.
444
00:27:54,767 --> 00:27:55,900
Help people.
445
00:27:57,200 --> 00:27:58,500
Be a superhero.
446
00:28:01,233 --> 00:28:03,600
Fuck the tortoise, Alex.
447
00:28:06,933 --> 00:28:08,633
RUDY: Right!
448
00:28:08,767 --> 00:28:10,367
Here we go, love,
clean clothes.
449
00:28:10,500 --> 00:28:12,567
You're gonna be
beating them off
with a shit stick, you are.
450
00:28:12,700 --> 00:28:14,133
There you go.
All right, let's...
451
00:28:15,367 --> 00:28:16,567
What the friggin' hell
are you wearing?
452
00:28:17,833 --> 00:28:21,533
Me jumper.
Maggie made it for me.
453
00:28:21,667 --> 00:28:23,300
He was cold.
I found it under the sofa.
454
00:28:23,433 --> 00:28:26,700
That's fucking me, that's me!
And I'm fucking flying, look!
455
00:28:26,833 --> 00:28:28,367
-What are you talking about?
-It's the future.
456
00:28:28,500 --> 00:28:30,533
That is me, that,
I fucking knew it.
457
00:28:30,667 --> 00:28:34,800
-Oh, it's just a jumper.
-This woman, she knits
the future. That is us, look.
458
00:28:34,933 --> 00:28:36,867
All right. How come there's
only four of us?
459
00:28:37,067 --> 00:28:38,500
Well, she's had to miss
Finn out, obviously.
460
00:28:38,633 --> 00:28:40,533
No one can knit
that fucking small, can they?
461
00:28:40,667 --> 00:28:41,800
(LAUGHING)
462
00:28:44,533 --> 00:28:47,533
Let's get him... Let's get
him ready for bed.
Hands in the air.
463
00:28:47,667 --> 00:28:48,733
Whoo-hoo.
464
00:28:48,867 --> 00:28:50,867
I'm gonna just sort
your collar out.
465
00:28:51,067 --> 00:28:53,767
Right, let's get this off.
Are you ready?
466
00:28:53,900 --> 00:28:57,667
Where's he gone?
Oh, my God, where's he gone?
There he is.
467
00:28:58,667 --> 00:29:01,067
Oh, tell him about
the chocolate.
468
00:29:01,133 --> 00:29:04,967
-What chocolate?
-The leather seats.
You were going to the seaside.
469
00:29:05,100 --> 00:29:09,300
Chocolate all over seats.
Dad's car with
the leather seats.
470
00:29:09,433 --> 00:29:11,367
Oh, shut up, man,
no one wants to hear
about that, that's boring.
471
00:29:11,500 --> 00:29:13,633
No. I like it.
472
00:29:13,767 --> 00:29:17,067
It was a Curly Wurly.
473
00:29:17,167 --> 00:29:22,067
And I'd put it in me back
pocket of me shorts.
474
00:29:22,133 --> 00:29:25,067
And I sat on it
all the way from home
until the motorway.
475
00:29:25,200 --> 00:29:27,200
That were a bloody
brilliant holiday.
476
00:29:27,333 --> 00:29:29,433
I can't... D'you know,
I forgot about?
477
00:29:30,500 --> 00:29:35,167
Ah... I buried me tank
on beach.
478
00:29:35,300 --> 00:29:39,300
The tank, I loved that
tank. I got it for my
birthday, didn't I?
479
00:29:39,433 --> 00:29:44,700
Then me mum and dad,
they dug up the whole beach,
but they couldn't find it.
480
00:29:47,900 --> 00:29:50,467
Fifteen years later they
went back, didn't they,
to the same beach.
481
00:29:52,167 --> 00:29:54,300
They were eating
their sandwiches.
482
00:29:56,133 --> 00:29:57,567
And there was a boy.
483
00:29:58,933 --> 00:30:00,200
He was making a hole.
484
00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:03,933
They found me tank.
I got me bloody tank back.
485
00:30:10,667 --> 00:30:12,133
Do you want to watch TV?
486
00:30:12,267 --> 00:30:13,733
-Uh, yeah.
-Yeah?
487
00:30:13,867 --> 00:30:15,167
-Yeah. All right.
-Good.
488
00:30:15,300 --> 00:30:18,433
I'll get crisps, shall I?
All right?
489
00:30:26,267 --> 00:30:29,633
The irony is that for me
to take your power
490
00:30:29,767 --> 00:30:32,400
and for you to stop being
trapped in closets,
491
00:30:32,533 --> 00:30:33,667
we need to
have anal sex.
492
00:30:33,800 --> 00:30:35,033
(CHOKES)
493
00:30:35,167 --> 00:30:36,167
Mmm-hmm.
494
00:30:37,767 --> 00:30:39,967
Just so we're clear,
495
00:30:40,100 --> 00:30:43,000
am I fucking you because
you're not gay
496
00:30:43,133 --> 00:30:45,333
and you're just sick
of having your power?
497
00:30:45,467 --> 00:30:48,333
Or am I fucking you
because you are gay
498
00:30:48,467 --> 00:30:50,767
and you just don't want
anyone to know about it?
499
00:30:53,467 --> 00:30:54,667
That's a head-scratcher.
500
00:30:56,867 --> 00:30:57,867
It's my dad.
501
00:31:00,967 --> 00:31:03,400
-He won't accept me.
-Well, then he's a dick.
502
00:31:05,200 --> 00:31:06,833
He's the one who needs
helping, not you.
503
00:31:11,533 --> 00:31:12,500
I should go.
504
00:31:22,300 --> 00:31:23,933
I don't suppose you'd
fancy a drink sometime.
505
00:31:25,100 --> 00:31:26,100
(CHUCKLING)
506
00:31:31,833 --> 00:31:34,633
NARRATOR: (ON TELEVISION)
Although their mating
is now over,
507
00:31:34,767 --> 00:31:38,067
the male will often
begin to review
his amorous affections.
508
00:31:38,200 --> 00:31:39,967
Ah! What are you doing?
509
00:31:40,100 --> 00:31:43,433
Nothing. Shit. Sorry,
I thought it was his neck.
510
00:31:43,967 --> 00:31:44,967
Oh.
511
00:31:50,067 --> 00:31:52,267
Right, come on you,
bugalugs, drink up.
512
00:31:52,400 --> 00:31:55,400
Homes Under the Hammer's
about to start. Let's have it.
513
00:31:55,533 --> 00:31:58,100
Come on, and we don't want
to miss that, do we?
514
00:31:59,467 --> 00:32:00,733
-What are you doing, man?
-(GROANING)
515
00:32:00,867 --> 00:32:02,067
I think he's having
a heart attack.
516
00:32:02,133 --> 00:32:04,533
RUDY: What do we do?
Good lord.
517
00:32:04,667 --> 00:32:06,733
Somebody help!
518
00:32:06,867 --> 00:32:08,567
-Somebody help!
-Breathe!
519
00:32:08,700 --> 00:32:11,967
-Jesus fucking Christ,
what do we do?
-Stand back.
520
00:32:12,100 --> 00:32:14,500
-Are you a doctor?
-I'm an electrician.
521
00:32:14,633 --> 00:32:16,067
He's not fucking breathing.
522
00:32:19,533 --> 00:32:20,867
Clear.
523
00:32:21,067 --> 00:32:24,067
Oh, shit.
You all right, mate?
524
00:32:24,133 --> 00:32:25,233
JESS: You all right?
525
00:32:34,633 --> 00:32:39,167
-Are you all right?
-It's all right, I'm here now.
It's all right.
526
00:32:39,300 --> 00:32:42,333
Thanks, thank you. Get him up.
527
00:33:02,833 --> 00:33:05,067
Finn's with him.
He's gone off to sleep.
528
00:33:09,133 --> 00:33:10,733
He's gonna die, isn't he?
529
00:33:13,867 --> 00:33:16,233
Not... Not now.
530
00:33:18,067 --> 00:33:19,067
Soon.
531
00:33:22,067 --> 00:33:23,967
And I'm going to be
all on me own.
532
00:33:25,667 --> 00:33:28,433
Who's going to look after me
when I get like that?
533
00:33:28,567 --> 00:33:32,767
Maybe you'll meet someone,
settle down, have kids.
Like a normal person.
534
00:33:32,900 --> 00:33:35,900
Who'd want to settle down
with me? Hmm?
535
00:33:41,100 --> 00:33:44,367
When my granddad got old,
we found him a home.
536
00:33:46,067 --> 00:33:47,200
He was happy there.
537
00:33:50,167 --> 00:33:53,800
Maybe it's the best thing
for him, for everyone.
538
00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:57,833
They'll look after him
and you can visit him
when you like.
539
00:34:02,067 --> 00:34:03,067
Yeah.
540
00:34:05,800 --> 00:34:07,100
Will you come with us?
541
00:34:10,867 --> 00:34:12,500
JESS: Of course I will.
542
00:34:26,900 --> 00:34:29,967
All we need do is get you
a bloody TV,
a couple of posters.
543
00:34:30,100 --> 00:34:32,433
It's a fucking bachelor pad,
that's what this...
Look at this.
544
00:34:32,567 --> 00:34:34,300
En suite, cheeky wee
in the sink.
545
00:34:34,433 --> 00:34:37,533
And if you fancy ham
and avocado sandwich
at 4:00 in the morning,
546
00:34:37,667 --> 00:34:39,667
you got your room service
there, cheeky tug.
547
00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:44,767
-He came.
He came to see me.
-Oi, listen to me.
548
00:34:44,900 --> 00:34:46,667
I'll come and see you.
549
00:34:46,800 --> 00:34:49,500
I'm gonna be here so
often you're gonna be sick
of the friggin' sight of me.
550
00:34:51,100 --> 00:34:53,067
I'll see you soon. Yeah?
551
00:35:06,633 --> 00:35:07,633
All right?
552
00:35:22,633 --> 00:35:25,067
Let's just get away,
go somewhere.
553
00:35:25,200 --> 00:35:28,567
-Start again.
-(LAUGHING) Where?
554
00:35:28,700 --> 00:35:31,067
I don't know. Anywhere.
555
00:35:32,833 --> 00:35:34,667
There's too many
memories for me here.
556
00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:36,400
Or,
557
00:35:37,533 --> 00:35:41,400
how about we don't
go anywhere
558
00:35:42,733 --> 00:35:46,200
and we just go
for a drink instead?
559
00:35:50,833 --> 00:35:51,833
(CHUCKLES)
560
00:36:09,400 --> 00:36:12,267
I went back to your group.
No one knows anything.
561
00:36:12,400 --> 00:36:14,200
Shit, I'm sorry, man.
I tried, you know.
562
00:36:15,633 --> 00:36:19,400
But then I went
to mum and dad's house
563
00:36:19,533 --> 00:36:21,233
and I got you a present.
564
00:36:24,300 --> 00:36:25,300
Eh?
565
00:36:27,700 --> 00:36:28,933
Oh, yes.
566
00:36:30,100 --> 00:36:31,533
They dug up the whole beach.
567
00:36:33,200 --> 00:36:35,767
They were having
their sandwiches.
568
00:36:35,900 --> 00:36:39,600
They did. I want you
to have it, yeah?
569
00:36:40,600 --> 00:36:43,633
You? I wasn't expecting
to see you.
570
00:36:45,567 --> 00:36:48,233
Really? Why?
Sorry, why might that be?
571
00:36:48,367 --> 00:36:50,567
Mr Johnson's not here
any more. He's gone.
572
00:36:53,767 --> 00:36:56,267
I'm sorry, I just, I seem to
have mislaid the old Filofax,
573
00:36:56,400 --> 00:36:57,800
which Mr Johnson do you mean,
574
00:36:57,933 --> 00:37:00,267
'cause I help a few
on a regular basis,
that's all, so?
575
00:37:00,400 --> 00:37:01,767
Len Johnson.
576
00:37:02,667 --> 00:37:04,067
I'm really worried about him.
577
00:37:05,567 --> 00:37:09,167
We've tried all the hospitals,
but there's no sign of him.
578
00:37:10,400 --> 00:37:11,433
Thanks.
579
00:38:29,067 --> 00:38:30,067
It's okay.
580
00:38:31,067 --> 00:38:32,167
There's no need to panic.
581
00:38:38,567 --> 00:38:40,200
We're going to be together.
582
00:38:42,900 --> 00:38:44,100
Me and Naomi.
583
00:38:47,900 --> 00:38:49,300
I know you'd be happy for us.
584
00:38:53,233 --> 00:38:55,200
But I can't risk you
ruining everything.
585
00:39:03,633 --> 00:39:05,167
(MUFFLED YELLING)
586
00:39:15,067 --> 00:39:16,700
(YELLING CONTINUES)
587
00:39:22,533 --> 00:39:24,900
What the fuck are you
doing to him, man?
588
00:39:27,233 --> 00:39:29,067
He's my friend.
589
00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:32,133
My power. I can swap
ages with people.
590
00:39:32,267 --> 00:39:34,667
Rudy Two used to let me
switch with him
for an hour a week
591
00:39:34,800 --> 00:39:36,833
just to give me a break
from being an old man.
592
00:39:46,933 --> 00:39:48,933
I loved her
from the minute I saw her.
593
00:39:50,767 --> 00:39:51,767
Naomi.
594
00:39:53,800 --> 00:39:55,067
She was my nurse.
595
00:39:55,933 --> 00:39:57,233
I never got married.
596
00:39:58,967 --> 00:40:00,400
I never found my true love.
597
00:40:00,967 --> 00:40:02,133
Until now.
598
00:40:02,267 --> 00:40:03,933
What if I was to tell her
what you've been doing?
599
00:40:05,567 --> 00:40:08,667
What if I showed her
the photo of you?
600
00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:11,067
'Cause then she'd see you
for what you really are.
601
00:40:12,633 --> 00:40:13,800
Please don't tell her.
602
00:40:16,500 --> 00:40:18,133
-You all right?
-(COUGHING)
603
00:40:18,267 --> 00:40:19,667
It's all right, mate.
604
00:40:26,133 --> 00:40:27,600
It's all right.
It's all right.
605
00:40:28,500 --> 00:40:29,500
Do it!
606
00:40:30,667 --> 00:40:32,433
Do it or I'll tell
her everything.
607
00:40:34,400 --> 00:40:35,800
Take his hand, it's all right.
608
00:40:36,967 --> 00:40:37,967
Come on.
609
00:41:07,400 --> 00:41:09,067
RUDY TWO: All right, pal.
610
00:41:14,433 --> 00:41:15,433
Here you are, mate.
611
00:41:16,733 --> 00:41:18,167
Now then,
612
00:41:18,300 --> 00:41:21,667
I believe a "thanks" is
in order, innit, young man?
613
00:41:21,800 --> 00:41:22,867
(CHUCKLING)
614
00:41:23,067 --> 00:41:24,267
You locked me in a cupboard.
615
00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:26,467
No, it wasn't a cupboard,
it was a store room.
616
00:41:26,600 --> 00:41:29,067
And I wiped your arse
and I gave you butterscotch
617
00:41:29,200 --> 00:41:30,900
and I let you watch
the friggin' snooker.
618
00:41:31,067 --> 00:41:34,533
-I don't like the snooker.
-You ungrateful fucker.
619
00:41:34,667 --> 00:41:37,367
Nah, I'm only kidding,
you did great.
620
00:41:37,500 --> 00:41:40,233
I'm going now, mate.
See you on Friday.
621
00:41:42,200 --> 00:41:43,667
Come on, give over,
you soft shite.
622
00:41:43,800 --> 00:41:46,067
Come here, come on,
welcome home.
623
00:41:53,600 --> 00:41:57,067
So, about that gay guy
that you hooked me up with.
624
00:41:59,367 --> 00:42:01,067
-Oh.
-Oh, yeah!
625
00:42:02,333 --> 00:42:03,733
I just wanted to say thanks.
626
00:42:05,400 --> 00:42:07,967
It felt good
helping somebody.
627
00:42:08,100 --> 00:42:11,200
You know, I think this is
what I'm supposed to do
with my power.
628
00:42:11,333 --> 00:42:14,667
You know,
be like a proper hero.
629
00:42:16,200 --> 00:42:20,233
-And all thanks to you, eh?
-Yeah, pleasure.
630
00:42:20,367 --> 00:42:23,200
So, hang on. Now you're
into helping people,
would you...
631
00:42:23,333 --> 00:42:24,900
No! I won't shag
your tortoise.
632
00:42:29,767 --> 00:42:30,733
Morning Mark.
633
00:42:31,467 --> 00:42:32,633
Did you sleep well?
634
00:42:45,467 --> 00:42:46,600
(QUIETLY) See ya later.
635
00:42:56,600 --> 00:42:57,967
-You all right?
-Yeah.
636
00:43:00,433 --> 00:43:01,467
(SIGHING)
637
00:43:03,400 --> 00:43:05,100
Is it weird that I miss him?
638
00:43:06,833 --> 00:43:08,800
It was nice having
someone to look after.
639
00:43:12,667 --> 00:43:14,200
No, I don't think it's weird.
640
00:43:19,400 --> 00:43:22,200
Do you know what?
If I wasn't such
a total fuck-up,
641
00:43:22,333 --> 00:43:26,733
I'd probably ask
you out for a drink
and you'd say yeah, because,
642
00:43:26,867 --> 00:43:29,267
well, I wouldn't be
the mess that stands
before you now,
643
00:43:29,400 --> 00:43:31,500
I'd be someone different,
you know, someone...
644
00:43:33,667 --> 00:43:36,133
You know, someone good.
645
00:43:36,267 --> 00:43:40,667
And we'd end up having
this really amazing
time together and...
646
00:43:40,800 --> 00:43:43,700
I dunno, we might even end up
as boyfriend and girlfriend.
(CHUCKLES)
647
00:43:46,500 --> 00:43:50,200
And it wouldn't end up with me
just fucking it up
all the time
648
00:43:50,333 --> 00:43:53,800
and you thinking I'm a total
cunt. It wouldn't be like that
at all, it'd be nice.
649
00:43:56,567 --> 00:43:58,600
And we'd be happy
650
00:43:58,733 --> 00:44:03,300
together and I don't know,
fucking hell, one day we might
even get a dog or something.
651
00:44:03,433 --> 00:44:04,967
(CHUCKLING)
652
00:44:11,500 --> 00:44:12,500
All right, then.
653
00:44:15,733 --> 00:44:16,867
"All right, then," what?
654
00:44:19,567 --> 00:44:22,300
You just asked me out
for a drink and I said yes.
655
00:44:30,367 --> 00:44:31,400
(CHUCKLES)
656
00:44:34,133 --> 00:44:37,567
Sam! Sam.
I wanna show you something.
657
00:44:46,700 --> 00:44:48,167
Is that me?
658
00:44:48,300 --> 00:44:51,533
Yeah, I think so. (CHUCKLES)
659
00:44:51,667 --> 00:44:54,233
And this girl down here
with the lightning bolt,
I had a heart attack,
660
00:44:54,367 --> 00:44:55,367
she saved my life.
661
00:44:57,067 --> 00:44:58,533
Who's that on top
of the building?
662
00:44:59,667 --> 00:45:02,067
-I don't know.
-Maybe it's you.
663
00:45:05,067 --> 00:45:07,233
What if we all
become superheroes?
664
00:45:07,367 --> 00:45:08,333
(CHUCKLES)
665
00:45:09,867 --> 00:45:13,867
I mean, like, you know,
proper superheroes.
666
00:45:18,167 --> 00:45:19,767
Maybe it's our destiny.
667
00:46:13,067 --> 00:46:14,167
WOMAN: I think it was
me friend, Leah.
668
00:46:14,300 --> 00:46:15,367
Leah?
669
00:46:15,500 --> 00:46:16,667
I think she did
something to me.
670
00:46:18,867 --> 00:46:20,567
-What you do?
-Probation worker.
671
00:46:20,700 --> 00:46:21,867
(SPITS)
672
00:46:23,133 --> 00:46:24,933
Oh, my God.
673
00:46:25,067 --> 00:46:27,867
Just don't talk to me.
I'm a twat.
674
00:46:28,933 --> 00:46:30,167
I'm Leah.
675
00:46:30,300 --> 00:46:31,367
It was you, wasn't it?
676
00:46:33,500 --> 00:46:36,200
Can I just...
Let me just say,
let me just say in me defence.
677
00:46:36,333 --> 00:46:38,500
-(SHRIEKS)
-(GROANS)
678
00:46:38,633 --> 00:46:41,233
ABBY: It's her.
She's downloaded into Alex.
679
00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:43,800
RUDY: Go, go,
go, go, go, girls!
680
00:46:47,567 --> 00:46:48,767
I think he's gone.
51171
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