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1
00:01:27,221 --> 00:01:29,490
All right, Griff, get your horse
back in the gate.
2
00:01:30,191 --> 00:01:32,893
Is my fly open again?
3
00:01:33,327 --> 00:01:36,931
I'm talking about your shoe horse,
you big Airedale.
4
00:01:37,131 --> 00:01:40,434
The blubber-aerobics class next door
is getting ready to start...
5
00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:42,470
-...in a couple of seconds.
-All right.
6
00:01:42,670 --> 00:01:44,672
So, what we got riding on this one,
big Al?
7
00:01:44,872 --> 00:01:48,242
Loser gets to use the bathroom last.
8
00:01:49,477 --> 00:01:51,912
Stinky seconds?
9
00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:54,482
You bet.
10
00:01:56,317 --> 00:01:58,152
Let's rock.
11
00:02:02,056 --> 00:02:05,326
Three, two, one...
12
00:02:05,860 --> 00:02:08,729
-...and they're off.
-Come on, Seattle Shoe.
13
00:02:08,896 --> 00:02:10,798
-Go, Knockout, go.
-Come on, Seattle Shoe.
14
00:02:10,965 --> 00:02:13,267
-Come on, Knockout.
-Come on, Seattle Shoe.
15
00:02:13,434 --> 00:02:16,504
-Yeah. Come on.
-Papa needs a new pair--
16
00:02:16,971 --> 00:02:19,473
-What happened?
-Well, the hungry hippos over there...
17
00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:22,343
...worked out
for a whole seven seconds.
18
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:25,913
It's probably time for a cheese break.
19
00:02:26,113 --> 00:02:28,516
How are we gonna settle
this race now?
20
00:02:28,716 --> 00:02:30,584
I got an idea.
21
00:02:32,319 --> 00:02:36,090
Free jerk chicken
at the food court, man.
22
00:02:40,294 --> 00:02:43,597
I won! I won!
23
00:02:44,798 --> 00:02:46,734
I win.
24
00:02:49,870 --> 00:02:53,007
I won the Shoetucky Derby.
25
00:02:53,207 --> 00:02:55,276
But I was ahead.
26
00:02:55,476 --> 00:02:56,911
Did you cheat?
27
00:02:57,111 --> 00:02:59,980
Is this the face of a cheater?
28
00:03:00,981 --> 00:03:04,151
Am I gonna have to check
that surveillance camera again?
29
00:03:04,485 --> 00:03:07,988
All right. I cheated.
30
00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:10,524
And I ate your lunch.
31
00:03:12,026 --> 00:03:14,028
Drank your vanilla shake.
32
00:03:14,228 --> 00:03:17,131
Al, that was Kaopectate.
33
00:03:18,499 --> 00:03:20,367
Still the best lunch I've had in years.
34
00:03:22,403 --> 00:03:26,607
Oh, will you look at those karate cows
hoofing it over to self-defense class?
35
00:03:26,807 --> 00:03:30,844
Or, as they call it,
tae kwon doughnut.
36
00:03:32,313 --> 00:03:35,649
Can you believe Gary's charging
250 bucks for that class?
37
00:03:35,849 --> 00:03:38,452
It's still less than a dollar a pound.
38
00:03:39,019 --> 00:03:41,255
What a stupid waste of money.
39
00:03:41,455 --> 00:03:43,624
Hey, speaking of waste of money.
40
00:03:51,966 --> 00:03:55,436
Al, I need $250.
41
00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:58,572
You're not taking
that self-defense class, are you?
42
00:03:59,173 --> 00:04:03,677
No. I'm buying you
a very special gift.
43
00:04:06,347 --> 00:04:08,816
Of course I'm taking
the self-defense class.
44
00:04:09,083 --> 00:04:10,417
Marcie already signed me up.
45
00:04:10,784 --> 00:04:15,990
Peg, I'm not wasting my money
like I wasted my youth, on you.
46
00:04:16,490 --> 00:04:19,193
Self-defense is not a waste of money.
47
00:04:19,393 --> 00:04:20,995
We live in a bad neighborhood.
48
00:04:21,195 --> 00:04:23,764
Peg, you live on the couch.
49
00:04:24,632 --> 00:04:26,100
The only danger you face...
50
00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:29,236
...is getting your head stuck
in a Häagen-Dazs carton.
51
00:04:30,037 --> 00:04:32,940
Peg, let's face it, evolution
has only equipped you women...
52
00:04:33,107 --> 00:04:36,010
...made you strong enough,
to roll out of bed in the morning...
53
00:04:36,176 --> 00:04:38,879
...squeeze yourself into a girdle,
ooze down the stairs...
54
00:04:39,046 --> 00:04:41,515
...and fry your man up a Pop-Tart.
55
00:04:42,650 --> 00:04:46,787
Peg, the truth is
no woman could ever take a man.
56
00:04:46,987 --> 00:04:49,623
You'd back me up on that,
wouldn't you, Hans?
57
00:04:49,823 --> 00:04:51,291
You see, Peg...
58
00:04:51,492 --> 00:04:53,293
...we men are bigger...
59
00:04:53,494 --> 00:04:56,130
...we're stronger, we're tougher...
60
00:04:56,330 --> 00:04:57,898
...we're--
61
00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:01,902
Dead meat.
62
00:05:05,272 --> 00:05:07,675
A FEW WEEKS LATER
63
00:05:09,009 --> 00:05:11,011
Al, guess what?
64
00:05:11,211 --> 00:05:14,214
You got your black belt in nag fu.
65
00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:19,887
Marcie and I have been promoted
to the advanced self-defense class.
66
00:05:20,087 --> 00:05:21,822
Aren't you happy for me?
67
00:05:22,022 --> 00:05:24,358
Do I look like a happy man?
68
00:05:24,892 --> 00:05:27,661
You don't even look like
a happy tree stump.
69
00:05:28,462 --> 00:05:31,098
I'm gonna go outside
and practice my kicks with Marcie.
70
00:05:31,298 --> 00:05:34,535
Look, this self-defense class
of yours is taking up way too much...
71
00:05:34,735 --> 00:05:36,837
...of your time and my paycheck.
72
00:05:37,037 --> 00:05:39,773
I haven't been able to find my left shoe
in three days.
73
00:05:39,973 --> 00:05:44,344
Now, as the breadwinner
and king of my castle, I demand--
74
00:05:45,746 --> 00:05:48,148
To be left alone.
75
00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:51,285
Good. Where's the shoe?
76
00:06:08,502 --> 00:06:12,473
Dad, if you're looking for a place
to stick your head, I suggest the oven.
77
00:06:13,674 --> 00:06:14,942
I'm looking for my shoe.
78
00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:18,178
It's a good thing we have Lucky.
79
00:06:18,345 --> 00:06:20,247
-Maybe he can track it down for you.
-Yeah.
80
00:06:20,414 --> 00:06:22,416
Let me get this old shoe
out of his mouth...
81
00:06:22,583 --> 00:06:24,118
...and he'll be ready for action.
82
00:06:24,318 --> 00:06:26,620
Oh, pumpkin, that's my shoe.
83
00:06:26,987 --> 00:06:30,157
Oh, Lucky, you found it right away.
84
00:06:30,357 --> 00:06:32,526
Good boy.
85
00:06:33,293 --> 00:06:36,730
Now we know he can chew.
Maybe next time he'll go for my throat.
86
00:06:37,131 --> 00:06:39,933
Oh, no, thanks. I don't eat pork.
87
00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:44,938
Dad, you look sad. What is it?
88
00:06:45,139 --> 00:06:47,508
-It's your mother.
-What'd she do?
89
00:06:47,708 --> 00:06:51,612
Well, the trouble started this morning
when I woke up...
90
00:06:51,812 --> 00:06:54,815
...and so did she.
You know how much I hate that.
91
00:06:59,186 --> 00:07:01,255
I think I know what it is, Daddy.
92
00:07:01,522 --> 00:07:02,956
You're just feeling lonely...
93
00:07:03,123 --> 00:07:05,592
...because ever since Mom
started taking her class...
94
00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:07,561
...she hasn't paid you any attention.
95
00:07:07,728 --> 00:07:10,931
Isn't that it, you big galoot?
96
00:07:12,566 --> 00:07:15,903
No, I like that part. I also like the part
she's too tired at night...
97
00:07:16,069 --> 00:07:18,005
...to wanna fool around.
98
00:07:19,573 --> 00:07:22,843
I do kind of miss her
calling me bullet head, though.
99
00:07:23,210 --> 00:07:28,882
Look, Daddy, a little lesson in women:
All Mom wants is just a little tenderness.
100
00:07:33,554 --> 00:07:37,424
If you really want Mom to stop
taking karate, you gotta take her out.
101
00:07:37,624 --> 00:07:41,161
Well, don't you think I would
if I thought I could get away with it?
102
00:07:42,796 --> 00:07:45,632
Dad, I think she means, you know,
take her out on a date...
103
00:07:45,833 --> 00:07:48,001
-Yeah.
-...and show her some affection.
104
00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:51,772
Romantic movies
always work for me.
105
00:07:51,972 --> 00:07:55,809
A Happy Meal and a Hello Kitty pen set
works for you, Kelly.
106
00:08:00,647 --> 00:08:05,452
Look, why don't you take Mom to go
see The Bridges Of Madison County.
107
00:08:05,652 --> 00:08:08,722
Now, I heard there's a new director's cut
with 11 extra minutes...
108
00:08:08,889 --> 00:08:12,259
...of Clint Eastwood
sponge-bathing Meryl Streep.
109
00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:17,397
Is there no other way?
110
00:08:18,265 --> 00:08:21,668
Well, you could make love to her
all night.
111
00:08:25,873 --> 00:08:29,877
Well, either way, I'll be eating
Junior Mints and crying in the dark.
112
00:08:30,878 --> 00:08:33,847
All right.
Bridges of Madison County it is.
113
00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:36,483
Oh, that was so much fun.
114
00:08:45,659 --> 00:08:49,129
Thanks for being
such a good sport, Jefferson.
115
00:08:49,496 --> 00:08:51,365
No problem.
116
00:08:51,865 --> 00:08:53,500
You know, just between you and me...
117
00:08:53,667 --> 00:08:56,937
...these workouts
are starting to turn me on.
118
00:08:59,373 --> 00:09:03,343
-So, what do you say?
-I say I need a flashlight.
119
00:09:03,677 --> 00:09:07,881
I think some of my equipment
rolled under the house.
120
00:09:09,783 --> 00:09:13,253
This is Miranda Veracruz
de la Jolla Cardenal...
121
00:09:15,856 --> 00:09:19,927
...reporting to you live at the premiere
of The Bridges of Madison County...
122
00:09:20,127 --> 00:09:21,862
...The Director's Cut.
123
00:09:22,062 --> 00:09:24,598
As you can see,
the re-release of this movie...
124
00:09:24,798 --> 00:09:27,267
...has generated
unbelievable excitement.
125
00:09:27,467 --> 00:09:30,270
I'm unbelievably excited, you know....
126
00:09:40,180 --> 00:09:42,015
FINAL EXIT
127
00:09:49,623 --> 00:09:52,392
Oh, Al, isn't this romantic?
128
00:09:52,592 --> 00:09:56,029
Finally you're taking me to a movie
that doesn't have the words "Debbie"...
129
00:09:56,196 --> 00:09:58,532
...or "does" in the title.
130
00:09:59,733 --> 00:10:03,971
I just can't figure out why you insisted
on taking me the night of my class.
131
00:10:04,171 --> 00:10:07,341
Pookie, tomorrow I may not be
in the mood to see Meryl and Clint...
132
00:10:07,541 --> 00:10:10,210
...playing Hide the Loofa
in the bathtub.
133
00:10:10,410 --> 00:10:15,015
Oh, my God, I'm in line to watch
Meryl Streep strip.
134
00:10:15,415 --> 00:10:18,118
No bloody way.
135
00:10:22,055 --> 00:10:25,125
Yeah, sure, go ahead,
take the easy way out.
136
00:10:28,395 --> 00:10:30,998
I just hope
I don't fall behind in class.
137
00:10:31,198 --> 00:10:34,134
Today was nunchak-to-the-nads day.
138
00:10:34,434 --> 00:10:35,969
Don't you understand, Peg?
139
00:10:36,136 --> 00:10:38,739
This women's self-defense
is against nature.
140
00:10:38,939 --> 00:10:41,408
Take the mighty wildebeest,
for example.
141
00:10:41,575 --> 00:10:45,345
He hunts while the wildebeests
just stays on her couch...
142
00:10:45,545 --> 00:10:48,248
...watching the Oprah-beestess.
143
00:10:49,216 --> 00:10:52,386
Then there's the ant. She just
sits there all day and lays eggs...
144
00:10:52,552 --> 00:10:55,722
...while the male is off dragging
those heavy Budweiser bottles...
145
00:10:55,889 --> 00:10:57,190
...down that anthill.
146
00:10:57,391 --> 00:11:00,961
-I'll give you another example--
-Hey.
147
00:11:10,037 --> 00:11:13,340
This is the bravest thing
this reporter has seen...
148
00:11:13,507 --> 00:11:17,044
...since Bill said,
"Hillary, I beg to differ."
149
00:11:17,244 --> 00:11:21,548
This courageous woman
cold-cocked this low-life mugger...
150
00:11:21,715 --> 00:11:23,617
...without any help whatsoever...
151
00:11:23,784 --> 00:11:28,889
...from the weasely man
who dares to call himself her husband.
152
00:11:34,461 --> 00:11:35,829
DAILY TRIBUNE
153
00:11:35,996 --> 00:11:38,899
CHOP-SOCKY MAMA SAVES
WUSSY-HUBBY'S WALLET!!
154
00:11:43,236 --> 00:11:46,339
Well, you got to admit, it's pithy.
155
00:11:46,540 --> 00:11:49,643
Jefferson, don't you understand
the problem?
156
00:11:49,943 --> 00:11:54,047
If this gets around town, people
are gonna start thinking I'm a nerd.
157
00:11:54,948 --> 00:11:59,052
Well, technically, Al,
you're not smart enough to be a nerd.
158
00:11:59,820 --> 00:12:02,355
No, no, you're more of a pantywaist...
159
00:12:02,522 --> 00:12:05,725
...or a limp-wristed sissy boy.
160
00:12:09,129 --> 00:12:12,432
Horse feathers, Jefferson.
I could have taken that mugger. I just--
161
00:12:12,632 --> 00:12:14,067
I didn't have time to react.
162
00:12:14,968 --> 00:12:18,038
Hey, I believe you, buddy.
It's the rest of Chicago...
163
00:12:18,238 --> 00:12:21,174
...that thinks Al is short for Alice.
164
00:12:22,642 --> 00:12:25,912
You gotta understand, when I felt
that hairy hand go in my pocket...
165
00:12:26,079 --> 00:12:28,281
...I naturally assumed it was Peg.
166
00:12:29,082 --> 00:12:31,251
Don't worry, Al.
It was just a little mugging.
167
00:12:31,451 --> 00:12:33,854
I mean, how much more press
could it possibly get?
168
00:12:35,455 --> 00:12:37,991
Great news, Al.
169
00:12:41,061 --> 00:12:44,131
Good Morning, Chicago
wants to do an interview.
170
00:12:44,331 --> 00:12:47,367
Fine. I'd like to set the record straight.
I am no wimp.
171
00:12:47,567 --> 00:12:51,204
Could a wimp score four touchdowns
in one game?
172
00:12:54,407 --> 00:12:57,577
Was that Pee Wee football
or Powderpuff?
173
00:12:58,078 --> 00:13:00,881
I'm sorry.
We're here to interview your wife.
174
00:13:01,081 --> 00:13:03,383
Would you be a doll
and brew us up some coffee?
175
00:13:03,583 --> 00:13:06,620
And feel free to make
some herbal tea for yourself.
176
00:13:09,556 --> 00:13:11,224
All right. Come on, Al.
177
00:13:11,424 --> 00:13:14,694
Hey. Hey, I think I know
how to put an end to all of this.
178
00:13:15,395 --> 00:13:19,032
Well, if you've got the tailpipe,
I've got the lips.
179
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:23,803
Let's assume for the sake of argument
that you are stronger than Peggy.
180
00:13:24,004 --> 00:13:26,406
I am stronger, damn it!
181
00:13:26,606 --> 00:13:30,610
Well, you know that
and I'm willing to play along.
182
00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:34,247
-But you have to prove it to the public.
-You want me to fight Peg on TV?
183
00:13:34,414 --> 00:13:36,116
-Love it.
-No.
184
00:13:36,950 --> 00:13:39,186
No. No. You gotta fight someone else.
185
00:13:39,386 --> 00:13:40,987
But can I still fight Peg?
186
00:13:41,188 --> 00:13:45,358
No, Al. Look, we have to stage a fight
even you can win.
187
00:13:47,194 --> 00:13:50,030
Okay. Look.
I have this stuntman friend.
188
00:13:50,230 --> 00:13:53,200
His name is Thunder, okay?
You go to this bar, he comes up.
189
00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:56,236
-He insults Peggy.
-And I buy him a drink?
190
00:13:59,039 --> 00:14:02,809
Later. First, you hit him with your
best shot. He pretends to be hurt.
191
00:14:03,009 --> 00:14:06,446
He falls down. You're out
of the Michael Bolton fan club.
192
00:14:11,084 --> 00:14:12,786
That's a good idea.
193
00:14:12,986 --> 00:14:15,422
That's a good idea.
And I can have Bud come in...
194
00:14:15,589 --> 00:14:17,023
-...and video the thing.
-Yeah.
195
00:14:17,190 --> 00:14:18,858
Then I'll fight Peg.
196
00:14:20,060 --> 00:14:22,696
That will work, but how can I
recognize your buddy?
197
00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:27,901
Oh, well, Thunder has a goatee,
wears a bandana...
198
00:14:28,101 --> 00:14:31,905
...and he reeks of that cologne,
Obsession for Men.
199
00:14:56,196 --> 00:14:57,931
Excuse me.
200
00:15:03,603 --> 00:15:05,272
You may go.
201
00:15:05,872 --> 00:15:09,276
Al, I thought you were taking me out
for a nice, romantic dinner.
202
00:15:09,476 --> 00:15:11,511
We are, Peg. I just wanna...
203
00:15:11,711 --> 00:15:14,614
...soak up the atmosphere here.
204
00:15:18,685 --> 00:15:21,054
Obsession for Men?
205
00:15:21,254 --> 00:15:25,859
Well, I experimented a little in college,
but it was just a phase.
206
00:15:30,897 --> 00:15:34,234
Honey, I wanna go freshen up.
You think the ladies' room is free?
207
00:15:48,848 --> 00:15:50,784
It's free.
208
00:15:53,386 --> 00:15:56,122
Dad, can we get this thing over with?
209
00:15:56,323 --> 00:15:59,893
It's kind of sleazy in here and,
frankly, it's a little scary.
210
00:16:00,093 --> 00:16:02,195
I don't wanna be in here
anymore than you do.
211
00:16:02,362 --> 00:16:06,099
What kind of low-life loser would
voluntarily come in a dump like this?
212
00:16:12,205 --> 00:16:16,209
Oh, this isn't the library.
213
00:16:16,776 --> 00:16:19,479
We must be in the wrong place,
study buddy.
214
00:16:20,880 --> 00:16:24,217
I thought we were gonna get hammered
and do it on the "Pac-Man."
215
00:16:25,151 --> 00:16:27,620
But that book must be checked out.
216
00:16:27,821 --> 00:16:30,223
Why don't we go to the other library
down the street?
217
00:16:30,423 --> 00:16:32,559
The one with the Jell-O shots? Cool.
218
00:16:35,729 --> 00:16:39,532
Well, she's moving on up.
She used to only date senators.
219
00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:42,769
Bud, here comes your mother.
Go hide.
220
00:16:42,969 --> 00:16:44,571
How am I gonna know when to start?
221
00:16:44,771 --> 00:16:49,008
When I say to this guy, Thunder,
"I'll tell you what I'm gonna do."
222
00:16:49,809 --> 00:16:52,746
Hey, Al, how come on the wall
next to the pay phone...
223
00:16:52,946 --> 00:16:56,316
...it says, for a good time,
call our house?
224
00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:58,985
Beats me. I never
had a good time there.
225
00:16:59,819 --> 00:17:01,788
What will you have?
226
00:17:04,424 --> 00:17:09,562
Did you call my wife an ugly, useless,
lazy, Oprah-watching...
227
00:17:09,763 --> 00:17:12,465
...bonbon-eating couch loafer?
228
00:17:12,665 --> 00:17:14,801
No, I said, "What will you have?"
229
00:17:15,201 --> 00:17:18,204
One of your finest beers.
Nothing for the wife.
230
00:17:19,973 --> 00:17:22,275
You're cute.
231
00:17:25,245 --> 00:17:28,081
Wanna ride a hog?
232
00:17:30,016 --> 00:17:34,754
-Well, all right, then.
-No, no, no. Mommy, daddy!
233
00:17:38,792 --> 00:17:41,227
Al, what are you doing?
234
00:17:41,428 --> 00:17:44,998
You take me out at night
and sniff other men?
235
00:17:45,799 --> 00:17:47,634
I'm not sniffing them, Peg.
236
00:17:47,834 --> 00:17:52,005
It's a male thing.
Shows dominance in the territory.
237
00:17:53,039 --> 00:17:56,576
Well, you're not gonna lift
your leg on a chair, are you?
238
00:18:04,818 --> 00:18:07,020
I'm Thunder. Sorry I'm late.
239
00:18:07,220 --> 00:18:08,621
Your wife.
240
00:18:08,822 --> 00:18:13,993
Your wife's a tacky,
chocolate-snarfing, couch-butted...
241
00:18:14,194 --> 00:18:17,597
...beehive-headed parasite.
242
00:18:23,303 --> 00:18:28,141
No one calls my wife a tacky,
chocolate-snarfing, couch-butted...
243
00:18:28,341 --> 00:18:34,147
...beehive-headed parasite
who snores louder than a logging mill.
244
00:18:36,149 --> 00:18:38,818
Al, he didn't say that.
245
00:18:39,018 --> 00:18:41,621
No, but he was gonna say it
if I hadn't stopped him.
246
00:18:41,821 --> 00:18:45,725
-So, what are you gonna do about it?
-What am I gonna do about it?
247
00:18:45,925 --> 00:18:48,261
I'll tell you
what I'm gonna do about it.
248
00:18:49,429 --> 00:18:53,533
Oh, no, please don't.
You're hurting me!
249
00:18:56,536 --> 00:19:00,073
I said, I'll tell you
what I'm gonna do about it, Bud!
250
00:19:05,778 --> 00:19:07,947
-Okay, Dad.
-Now...
251
00:19:08,681 --> 00:19:11,651
...would you mind repeating
what you just said to my wife.
252
00:19:11,851 --> 00:19:13,319
Well, I forgot.
253
00:19:13,520 --> 00:19:17,257
-A chocolate-snarfing--
-Oh, yeah, yeah.
254
00:19:17,457 --> 00:19:20,727
A couch-butted,
beehive-headed parasite.
255
00:19:20,927 --> 00:19:22,495
All right?
256
00:19:23,963 --> 00:19:26,466
You asked for this, pal.
257
00:19:26,866 --> 00:19:28,501
One...
258
00:19:29,002 --> 00:19:30,370
...two--
259
00:19:30,570 --> 00:19:32,338
Three.
260
00:19:36,543 --> 00:19:39,412
I got it. Good night.
261
00:19:45,919 --> 00:19:47,253
DAILY TRIBUNE
262
00:19:47,420 --> 00:19:49,155
WOMAN SAVES
SHOE WEENIE AGAIN
263
00:19:53,293 --> 00:19:57,397
You ever think about
just getting a perm?
264
00:19:58,431 --> 00:20:01,701
And selling Mary Kay cosmetics?
265
00:20:10,910 --> 00:20:13,446
They give you a pink car.
266
00:20:18,184 --> 00:20:23,823
Tell me, Mrs. Bundy, has your husband
always been more Lois than Clark?
267
00:20:24,857 --> 00:20:28,461
Now, look here, Miranda.
268
00:20:31,431 --> 00:20:33,399
If you really want some film at 11...
269
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:35,802
...why don't you follow me
down to the brewery.
270
00:20:35,969 --> 00:20:39,172
I'll tie a bowling ball to my ankle,
dive in a vat of beer.
271
00:20:39,372 --> 00:20:44,043
I'll leave this world the same way
I entered my marriage, dead drunk.
272
00:20:48,181 --> 00:20:51,284
Hey, I thought you said I could have
your bowling ball when you die.
273
00:20:51,451 --> 00:20:54,020
-Don't you push it, Jefferson.
-Hey, come on.
274
00:20:58,057 --> 00:21:01,894
-Daddy?
-You wanna kick me while I'm down?
275
00:21:02,228 --> 00:21:04,697
No, that's Mom's job.
276
00:21:06,199 --> 00:21:10,169
Now, you remember Genghis
from the library, right?
277
00:21:10,637 --> 00:21:13,806
Okay, go ahead Gengie.
278
00:21:15,642 --> 00:21:17,610
Mr. Bundy...
279
00:21:18,711 --> 00:21:23,850
...would you give me your hand
in daughter marriage?
280
00:21:29,856 --> 00:21:33,926
You know, Genghis,
your timing couldn't be better.
281
00:21:34,827 --> 00:21:37,597
You wanna do me a favor, son?
282
00:21:40,066 --> 00:21:43,636
You wanna say what you just said to me
in front of the camera here?
283
00:21:43,836 --> 00:21:45,405
Sure, Dad.
284
00:21:45,605 --> 00:21:48,408
Hey, and better still,
hold my wallet.
285
00:21:48,608 --> 00:21:50,109
Cool.
286
00:21:51,511 --> 00:21:54,113
-Call my wife an idiot.
-Okay.
287
00:21:54,647 --> 00:21:56,115
Mrs. Bundy...
288
00:21:56,282 --> 00:21:58,151
...you're an idiot.
289
00:22:01,120 --> 00:22:02,922
That's good.
23128
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