Original subtitles

Oh, baby, you are great.

Oh, that's fantastic.

Oh, I'm glad you like it.

Oh, you just really love to please, don't you? Yes, I do.

Oh, God, yeah.

I hope this is feeling good.

Oh, yes, it is. Oh, yeah.

Oh, you're slaying me, baby. You're slaying me.

Oh, that's so good.

Oh, good morning there.

How are you doing?

I don't know.

I know. I'm pretty good.

How are you?

Great.

Oh, she's good. This woman, you have gifted hands.

Thank you.

Gifted hands.

Listen,

honey, why don't we...

Finish this up upstairs, okay?

I'll see you in a little room, all right? Okay.

All right, thank you.

Oh, God.

You know, I've made a lot of investments in my life.

That's the best investment I ever made. Mail order, bride.

God, quite amazing.

You know, you've got to get yourself one of them.

Have you had sex?

You need to have some experience.

If you have sex and marry the first woman that you have sex with and nobody

else, that woman will lead you by the nose for the rest of your life.

When was the last time you saw a vagina?

When you were being born?

Come on, Dad.

Oh, come on. Don't feel funny about me talking to you like this.

Fathers and sons are supposed to talk about sex.

Okay?

Yeah. You know what?

I'm going to have to give you a handjob.

Come on, Dad. Yeah.

Stop. Come on.

She's a mail -order bride. It's not like your real mother. It's not like

ancestor or anything.

You know, she wants to keep the family happy. She wants to stay here.

That's the beauty about these mail -order brides. They come over. They have

with you. They clean up the house. It's perfect.

All right?

I don't know.

I'll think about it. We'll think about it. All right. Think about it a lot.

There's no way that boy came out of my loins.

Honey? Oh, hi.

How are you? Good. You are always busy doing something here now.

Oh, yes. I am a very lucky man, you know that?

Well, thank you.

I wanted you to do me a little favor.

Kind of a delicate kind of situation. You know my son, right? He's a good

-looking kid, isn't he? Yeah.

You know he doesn't have any experience at all with a lady?

Really? You know experience?

Yeah, he doesn't.

Now, I know you want to keep me happy and keep the family happy.

If he doesn't get any experience, he's just going to marry the first broad that

just had sex with him and ruin him, okay?

So we want to... make sure that he gets a little experience. So I thought maybe

give him a little hand job or something, you know. He's very, very shy.

He needs a guiding hand, and you have perfect hands for guiding.

Could you do that for me?

Yeah?

Okay, for you.

Yeah?

Did I tell you I love you?

Yes, I did.

I'm going to buy you a nice coat or something. Okay, or a card. Do you want

new card? I'll buy you a new card. All right.

I'll give you up there somewhere, okay?

Okay. Thank you, honey.

Oh, yeah.

Hey. Hey, what's up?

I'm good.

Oh, okay.

Oh, you seem a little tense.

Yeah.

What's going on?

Oh, it's okay.

Let me get you to relax a little.

There you go.

It's all right.

Just relax.

Why don't you come over here?

Oh wow.

Yeah.

Whoa.

Oh, yes.

Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh.

Thank you.

Hmm.

Woo -hoo!