Original subtitles

Where do you want these?

Anywhere, Luke.

Don't bother with the old -fashioned look. I'm not your employee anymore, and

I'm probably not your friend after the way you conned me out of the sandwich

bar.

I saved you money, I saved you grief.

Get off.

You just didn't like the idea that I might be able to go into business for

myself.

Look, if it's not duty and it's not friendship, why are you helping me move

today? I just want you out from under my bloody feet.

Oh, yes.

Very nice.

And what do you plan to use for money?

Go on, then.

Have a guess. How much?

200 a week.

Three? One.

What's the catch?

No catch.

All right. What's the fiddle?

Max, catches and fiddles are part of the pre -recession economy.

Hard bargaining, that's the secret today.

Lethal negotiating skills.

Nimble brain. Think or think.

That's the motto for the 90s. Oh, sure.

There'll be a catching it somewhere.

Are you off?

That's right. I was hoping you'd have my sound system up for me. Amp yourself.

Yeah, I'm in.

Great.

Come on over.

Well, I'll bring your luggage with you.

Go to Heathrow straight from here, eh?

Closer, anyway.

Yeah.

Champagne's on, eh?

It will be.

Yeah.

I'll do something in the kitchen. I'll bring a gloaty cheeks.

No, something else.

Okay.

All right.

Hurry up.

Love you.

Bye.

Good.

Tony Tolopopov says they're making terrific progress.

Four shafts.

Three of the little vending trucks on the road.

Volume of sales rising steadily.

I've read it.

You know, inside a year we should have four businesses instead of one.

It's been a good investment for us.

Is it viable?

Well, it's one of the reasons we're going there, isn't it? Find that out.

At least it owns a good idea.

Fast food in Russia is a novelty, isn't it?

Pizzas for the proletariat.

Karl Marx should have thought of it. Saved everybody a lot of buggering

These are really good.

You know what's missing?

What?

What? Extra toppings.

I don't know.

Yes, yes, I know, Peter. I've read the report.

No.

No, I haven't read the summary of the... Well, of course I will.

Yes, before the next governor's meeting, I promise.

There's too much milk in this cereal.

What? You made it, Soggy.

Oh, sorry, Peter. No, no, I was talking to... Sure.

Well, sure, of course I will. I'll make time.

OK. Bye.

Mrs. Bloom will be here in five minutes.

It's nutritious and you get a free dinosaur. Don't complain.

I can't eat it.

Hello, Rabbi Wartburg.

Oh. Yes, hello, Mrs. Fisher.

Yes, I... Well,

of course.

Of course he's entitled to kosher food.

Well... No, no, I know he's not.

Look, as soon as they call me back, I'll let you know, okay?

Yes, yes, it is distressing, I agree.

Yeah.

Um, look, Mrs Fisher, can I call you back?

Okay. Bye.

Rabbi Warburg, can you hold...

Yes, Rabbi Warburg.

Oh, hello, Simon.

The weekend?

Oh, I don't know. I haven't given it a thought.

Hey, Milton.

Now, look, I live upstairs.

It's not her, it's not me. Who the hell is it?

You don't know?

No, I don't know. I wouldn't ask if I knew, would I?

This, uh, what's his name, isn't he? Pop star.

Always in the papers for something or other. Press are always round.

What's his name, uh... Is he in residence?

On his way back from America with someone else's wife.

Always on duty to press.

No one wants to live there.

People who let them flats. Always on the lookout for a mug.

Now, what's his name? Uh, not Michael Jackson, the other one.

Certainly know how to close a deal. Shut up.

Hell of a bargain.

Shut up.

Terminal two.

Of course I'll see Andrew.

But the question is, will Andrew see me? He might talk to you.

He won't to me.

Nor to his father.

Will you see them?

I'm sorry.

You probably think I'm worrying about nothing.

Well, you say Andrew's taking drugs. That's not nothing.

If you're right.

I am.

What signs have you seen?

What makes you so sure?

He will see you.

You said he will.

He wants to come on his own.

Not with me.

All right, tell him I'll see him at half past six this evening, OK?

OK.

$1 ,000, $1 ,000, $1 ,000. Doesn't anybody want rubles in this country?

Only in multiples of a thousand.

Did you manage to get hold of him around the time it popped up?

The phone's still out, but I've written him before we left London.

Anatoly Popov.

Tessa Biggert.

Frank Carver.

I'm sorry you see the place like this.

What happened?

Someone doesn't like you.

Yes, mafiosnics.

Five or six, I think.

They smash things, they put oil into pizza dough.

You see, this is the mafia way.

You pay them, they stop.

Don't pay.

A little worse each time.

Extortion? What do you call it?

Detection. Of course.

You wouldn't pay.

Yes, I try not to. You see, they don't do enough to put us out of business.

Just to make life awkward.

And terrifying.

Yes, that's true.

What's their price?

Enough that it hurts.

But not so much that we must close down and then payment the top.

Everyone at Baumblatt read your report. It's clear that the cooperative is doing

tremendously well.

It could be a showcase for the foundation.

Showcase?

Not at the moment, I think.

You've got a problem.

We've got a problem.

Oh, come on.

Let's go. It's too depressing to be here.

I'll finish up later.

Come on.

Surely foreign investment's good for the bloody Mafia, isn't it? Rich economy,

rich crooks.

They know you are coming here.

And they want to show that they will be a problem for you.

They knew we were coming?

Sure, they know much.

It is good business to know, Frank.

Are you sure?

Oh, yes.

Annette! I have to go in five minutes.

Oh!

Teenage werewolf chainsaw massacre, no?

Wonderful world of nature, yes.

Where did they get them from?

School? Kids rent them.

Quit a night.

I'll get money prices.

Mortally?

Nothing.

She thinks I'm taking drugs.

That's right, she does.

She likes to have something to worry about.

Likes to? You know, mothers.

She sees all that stuff on television.

She says you're morose, you stay in your room, you don't talk to her, you play

loud music, you go out without saying where you'll be, you get back late,

say who your friends are.

So I'm normal.

Are you taking drugs?

I sometimes think she'd be happy if I did.

Feeling bad makes her feel good.

Andrew, you're a bright boy.

Toast falls on the butter side, the sun sets in the west, mother's worry.

Try and let her into your life.

Just a little bit.

Okay?

I must go.

I'm hospital visiting.

Would you like me to drop you off?

Great, thanks.

No.

Go away! No!

No!

This will probably seem ridiculously melodramatic.

But you'd think we'd be impolite.

Good morning, Miss Spigot.

Good morning, Mr. Carver.

Well, shall we go now?

Go where?

It is not far.

Please come.

Who exactly are you?

Quite soon now.

Please, please.

I don't wish.

Whisk, uncle, whatever you say.

Please, we'll just be a moment. It is to your advantage.

We only want the help.

Why are you separating?

Where are they taking Cesar?

You nearly ready for off?

Go and collect your thing.

All right. Hello, darling.

Hi.

Haven't changed your mind?

No, no, of course not.

They should spend time with you.

Right, well, I'll have them back tomorrow sometime. They're time for tea.

Great. It'll give me an extra hour to solve the problems of the world.

Busy, are you?

Well, I've got notes to write up on the Children's Act. I've got a prisoner on

hunger strike because he can't get kosher food. The prison governor thinks

Jews are famous vegetarians.

I'm giving instruction for eight bar mitzvahs. I'm chef, waiter and

And Mrs. Posner is distraught because Andrew's taking drugs, she thinks.

Is he?

Oh, I don't know. I don't think so.

Well, don't worry. They'll be fine.

Yes, I'm sure they will.

Ah! Oh, my God!

Lily!

Let me guess.

This is a tourist department, Mr. Turner.

Who is to say, Mr. Carver?

Where are you taking Tessa?

Miss Piggott?

No, no, no. They're just behind us.

I think we'll have to stop.

Reduce main speed.

Out. Out.

You okay?

You there?

Can I talk?

Don't call.

They're fine.

Don't call.

Don't be neurotic.

I wonder if they're all right.

Wouldn't Simon let me know if there was a problem? Of course he would, so don't

call.

Hello, Simon, it's me.

Hi, I knew you'd call.

What do you mean you knew I'd call?

Oh, I'm sorry.

Okay, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have called. I'm sorry. I understand.

Diane, I understand. I really do. I worry about them, too, and they're away

me most of the time.

No, I didn't mean that.

Yeah, they had a nice time. They really enjoyed themselves. I think they did.

Um...

Well, we went to the kids' theatre and then they had tea in a cafe and we

Monopoly.

Alex won, of course.

And now they're in bed.

In bed where?

In my bed.

All three of them? It's a big bed.

Yes, it is, and that's none of your business anymore.

Oh, don't be.

I never have time to take them out or play a game with them or anything.

Are you praising me or blaming me?

Neither.

Listen.

Forget it.

Give them my love.

Time for introductions, perhaps.

My name is Grigoriev.

This gentleman is Mr. Ivanov.

Now, I'll tell you our names freely, since we are well known to the police.

Some of them are... Hey, hey!

Now, listen.

I'm not talking to you, and I'm not talking to him. I want to know where

Piggott is.

Well, you can't talk to him, since he doesn't speak English. This is why I'm

here.

But you should talk to me.

Because there are one or two things that must be discussed between us.

Between all of us.

A negotiation.

Now, you're a businessman, Mr. Carver. You understand.

I don't.

I don't understand why I'm here. I don't understand why Miss Pigger isn't here.

I don't understand what you lot want.

Come, Mr. Carver.

We will talk.

We will find a middle way.

This is the essence of business.

Nothing disagreeable will happen to you. I'll ask you a question, mate.

Where is Miss Piggott?

Now,

let's

start with the bomb blood foundation.

Listen, you bastard.

You have been interrogating...

Are you okay? Yes, yes.

Yes, I'm fine, I'm fine. Are you sure?

Yes, they didn't touch me, really.

Carver it down.

There you see, Mr. Carver.

Why, I think they're worse, all is well.

What do they want?

I have been telling Mr. Carver a negotiation.

This is Mr. Ivanov.

He has a business interest in a little corporate adventure you visited

yesterday. Extortion and violence.

Oh, business.

And since you have become, as it were, the new owners...

Our negotiation must be with you. This is why you're here.

We're not the owners.

Control at the... Why you split the hair?

You have the money, and it is money that we're speaking about.

Shove it.

We're not making any deals with you.

He's not as patient as I am, not as tolerant.

I think you should talk to each other. A little conference here on...

Try to reach a sensible conclusion. This is quite serious, you know. Come on,

let's get out of here. This guy's full of piss and wind.

Are you okay?

At least we're in this together.

To be honest, I'd sooner it was just you.

Chance of a daring escape by leaping from window to porch, porch to hay bale,

hay bale to car with a key still in the ignition, is there?

How are you, Mum?

I thought not.

What's your master plan?

What's yours?

Pay them.

Oh, it's an old treatment. It sometimes works.

Yeah, when you didn't turn up.

When they didn't bring you here.

I was so scared.

I thought of all the things I couldn't afford to lose.

I don't think I've been so scared in all my life.

Good.

Crossed in love on one trip, kidnapped on another. Russia's not a very lucky

place for you, is it?

I love you.

Do you still love me?

Yes.

There you go.

Russia's getting lucky all the time.

Oh my God.

What do you think? Might they kill us?

Don't be daft, of course not.

What you doing?

Making a will.

You already got a will.

Yes, but it leaves everything to you.

Look, they're not going to kill us.

They want something from us.

Which we've refused to give.

So far.

But we're going to have to make a deal.

Don't necessarily have to honour it, but we're going to have to make it to get

out of here.

There's something I want you to know.

What?

I'm so frightened I can hardly move.

Hey, come on.

Don't worry, we'll be okay.

Don't get brave, okay?

Okay? Yes.

I don't want to lose you.

Tomorrow night I'm going to take you out to a slap -up meal, celebrate our

freedom, okay?

A slap -up meal?

Well, somewhere we're through it anyway.

I'm glad I'm here with you.

I mean, I'm not glad I'm here. I'm glad... Yeah, I know what you mean.

You have been thinking

things over, I imagine.

Well, we also.

Now, it occurs to us, well, it occurs mostly to Mr. Ivanov, that you could

a double source of income.

Number one, we ransom you.

Number two, we ask a fee to allow the corporates to function without problems.

Now, you are from the UK.

High profile.

You want to invest in this business or that?

Okay. So you must take business risk.

Is being kidnapped a business risk?

Here now?

Yes, it is.

The Russian economy is most delicate.

At one time, we had no chance for enterprise.

But now?

We are all free.

Free to be bloody crooks.

This is correct.

Freedom and power, we have both.

Let me tell you something.

To stop us, the mafia squad, the police, they have 20 men and a leather car.

The car has no gasoline.

So, we do as we please.

Look, you smarmy bum.

Miss Piggott, you were about to say something.

Yeah, I'd like to bloody say something. Thank.

You want a solution to us and a payoff from the cooperative?

Yes. Okay, ransom us. In fact, we'll organize the ransom.

And we'll pay you whatever sum of money you would expect to take from the

cooperative in a year.

Why? You get what you want, we go free, and the cooperative isn't bled to death.

It's a business deal.

We make things simple.

You give us $25 ,000 or we kill you.

You can't just do that.

We've got government connections.

You can't just murder us. So you think to kill is difficult?

No, it's easy.

No big international incident, no embassy, television, scandal, all this

rubbish. No.

You're drunk and you fall into river Niva. What?

Easy. And if we pay, you'll leave the cooperative alone?

No.

Okay, for now.

So, what's $25 ,000 in sterling?

$14 ,706.

Call it 14 grand, eh?

Let's call it 15.

Oh, you couldn't speak English.

Come on, let's go.

No, no, no, Mr.

Cowan, no. I'm afraid that's not going to be the way.

We must stay here until we get money in our pockets.

Cash, of course.

What? You're crazy.

We'd have to route the payment through God knows what channels.

It's foundation money.

We can't just phone someone and say, send a ransom, we've been kidnapped.

There really will be an international incident.

You must find someone who will bring the money, don't you?

Someone who will do as he's told.

Yeah.

What do you want?

You've got 15 grand, right?

Yes. A deposit on the sandwich bar.

15 grand.

What time is it?

Pick up the 15 grand. You change it to dollars.

Get yourself a visa, get to Heathrow, and get on the first flight to St.

Petersburg. Someone will meet you.

Wind up.

Max? Hello?

Hello?

Your Russian phone system's not up to much, is it?

Hello, Frank.

What time is it?

Oh, yeah, hang on a minute.

Yeah, I'll get him.

Max, now listen.

Listen!

We've been kidnapped by the Russian mafia, Tessa and me.

The 15 grand is for the ransom, Max.

I've got a bloody gun pointing at me.

Bollocks.

No, at my head, actually.

No, Max, no, no, no, don't hang up, Max. No, don't hang up! Don't hang... Max,

it's me.

He's telling the truth.

Listen, you'll get your money back from Bamblap, but we can't go that route now.

The last thing we want is contact with anyone from the Foundation. Any kind of

panic. We just foul things up.

Yes, yes, I'm fine.

I'm a bit scared.

Look, they've given us instructions about what you must do. Frank's going to

fill you in on that, OK?

OK, Max?

I don't believe this.

All right, put him on.

Go where?

Okay.

Of course I can remember that.

Yeah, I'll do it.

Yes!

I don't believe I'm going to do it, but I'll do it.

If it was just Carver, I'd make them an offer they couldn't accept.

What did she take?

Everything. Well, we don't know yet. We've washed him out to be on the safe

side. But it could have been crack.

It could have been ecstasy, uppers, downers. We'll have to ask him later.

Look, I have to go.

He's okay.

All right.

He came to you, but he couldn't come to me.

I should have spent more time with him.

I didn't give him enough time.

I gave him 15 years of my life. He still couldn't come to me.

It's all right, Rabbi. I'll stay. You can go now. Oh, no, it's all right. I

stay. You can go now.

Can I have your ID, please?

Let's go inside.

Do you

want to see your

friends, Max?

Where are they?

I take you.

Get dressed, Mark.

Don't be long.

We must wait here for a while.

Make me know you know me, okay?

Voyo.

Take your mask off.

Hello?

I thought they were going to kill us anyway.

Did you? I did.

Didn't you?

Hey,

hey.

We're in the right place. Come on, let's celebrate.

Let's get married.

I'm proposing.

Max, thank God you found us.

What the hell is going on?

Oh, everything, Max. Are you all right? Yes, I'm fine. Well, I am now.

Where's Frank?

Up here to be doing some sort of deal with you or Mikey.

Through an intermediary, of course.

Beater fiddles, tax fiddles.

Everything's a fiddle here.

Oi! I've had enough of you for one day.

We're getting married.

You're going to be best man. Eh?

When?

Tomorrow afternoon.

What happened?

Are you all right?

It's a sprain. It doesn't hurt.

What happened? Is he okay?

Yeah, of course.

But he's bandaged.

Diane, it's nothing. He fell in the park. It's a sprain. It's nothing.

Oh, I'm sorry. I've had a lousy weekend.

He promised me a slap -up meal.

Do you know how much this stuff would cost back in England?

Another romantic touch.

To us.

To what?

To you.

This is the weirdest bloody stag party I've ever been on.

Well,

they're in bed, but they're not asleep.

No, I've got a two -hour drive, thanks. Oh, it's just a drop. Hardly half a

glass. Oh, right.

I'm sorry.

Well, you had a rough time.

They really enjoyed it, didn't they?

Seemed to, yeah.

Weekend after next?

Yeah, that'll be fine.

and Son, and Holy Spirit.

Amen.