Original subtitles

Good time, anytime you need a payment. Good time, anytime you need a break.

Good time, anytime you're up and under.

Not getting hassled, not getting hustled. Keeping your head up for water.

Making a way when you can.

Temporary layoffs. Good time.

Okay.

Stand still, Michael.

There, thank you. Oh.

Hey, Thoma, ain't breakfast ready yet?

Relax, popsicle stick.

Can't you see it's being made?

Boy, things sure get done a lot faster when mom...

Boy, sending you in for Mars like sending in Tiny Tim for Stevie Wonder.

J .J., why don't you stop picking on Thelma?

Thanks, Michael.

You're welcome. But I agree with J .J.

I'm so hungry I can eat a horse.

And whatever she cooks is going to taste like one anyway.

Will you stop picking on me?

Uh, Thelma, the coffee's boiling over.

We enjoy watching you in your misery.

If you enjoy misery, stand in front of a mirror.

You got some nerve, you old Frankenstein. All right, that's enough.

knock it off. You see your sister's having a hard time.

My shirt ready yet, baby girl? Yeah, daddy, I just finished it.

Ma went to a funeral in Cleveland. We got the stiff right here.

Why'd you like a stiff lip with no starch in it?

Thelma. Michael, leave me alone. I'm having enough trouble.

Daddy, can you tell Thelma that the oatmeal... No, Michael, you heard your

sister. Leave her alone, son.

All right. I just wanted to tell her that the oatmeal is burning.

Oh, no!

Thelma, are you sure you didn't do the special effects for Towering Inferno?

Junie, how'd you like me to press your face?

girl. I mean, everything considered, you're doing a great job.

Your mother would be real proud of you.

Now, come on, y 'all. Let's sit down and eat this delicious breakfast I made for

us.

Yeah, go ahead on, Michael.

Listen, your mother wants to say hello to all of you, but make it quick now

because it's long distance.

Hi, Mama. I'm fine.

Hi, Mom. I'm fine, too.

Hello,

Mother dear.

This is your eldest son here.

Let me give you a long list of all the disasters going on.

Junior's just jiving, baby.

Everything here is fine. Just relax and enjoy the funeral.

Oh, she's the one that died.

Yeah, in that case, have a nice time with your folks, baby.

Yeah, Floyd, I know it's a sad occasion, but your aunt did live a nice long

life.

Huh?

Oh, baby, my job at Brady's going fine. Couldn't be better. And I'm doing great

at my movie usher -in job.

Huh? Look, Floyd, everything here is under control. Ain't no sense you

back. Yeah, but I wish you'd get here by dinner time.

baby, just doing your fat mouthing as usual.

Yeah, well, we all miss you.

We love you.

Especially me.

All right. Bye, baby. Bye.

Your membership in this family is hanging by a very slender thread.

I'm about to put your birth certificate in escrow.

Boy, this looks delicious.

Not too bad.

Oh, baby girl.

Not at all.

Can't hardly wait to eat it, can you, Junior?

Looks delicious.

Uh -uh. Well, I've been setting your fat mouth with you kids so much like I made

myself late for work.

What about the breakfast?

Well, good as it looks. Now, Mama, I have to skip it. I got to get dressed.

But you don't need it all up here. Help you grow up big and strong.

Oh, yeah.

I don't want to forget that.

It'll be all right once I hammer down these sleeves.

to be picky, but there's one thing that I hate, and that's an unfluffed pillow.

Well, a pillow between your ears ain't fluffed too tough, either.

You got some nerve talking about pillow ain't fluffed. Look, J .J., I'm tired of

you criticizing me. You're doing a terrible job.

All right, all right. Please stop it. If there's ever a time I wasn't in the

mood for halfling, it's right now.

Oh, Dad, you're home.

No, I ain't home, fool. I'm sunning on the beach at Acapulco.

early, Junior. So what?

Something wrong, Daddy?

No, ain't nothing wrong.

Except you heard the latest unemployment figure's 8 .3.

Well, you can add me to the statistics.

I just got laid off. Not you, Daddy. You're a system foreman. Yeah, and the

foreman's gonna be standing in front of me at the unemployment office.

Seems like things slowed down at the plant, so Brady put a bunch of us on

they call temporary layoff.

Well, Daddy, that's not so bad. It's just temporary.

Baby girl, if there's one thing I've come to find out in life that's

it's a temporary layoff.

The president said that the economy's going to turn around.

Yeah, I'd like to turn it around, bend it over, and give it a swift kick.

Hey, one of y 'all answer that, please. If it's your mother, I don't know how

I'm going to tell her about this.

I'll handle this.

Hello.

Evans House of Happiness.

Mr. Carter?

Yeah, sure, I'll come in early today.

No, no problem at all.

Okay, bye.

Well, Dad, you look like a black cloud.

So I'm here to bring you the silver lining.

That was my boss from the movie theater. He wants me to come in early today.

So what?

So I'll be taking up the financial slack in the family.

Junior, what are you talking about?

Well, Dad, like I told you, I've been doing great at my movie ushering job.

And the reason he wants me to come in early today has got to be to give me a

promotion. Wants to make me the head ush.

What makes you so sure?

Because whenever there's a delicate situation, he always calls on me to

it. Like last week, we had this little problem up in the balcony.

You know, this couple was getting too cozy, hugging and stuff like that. But I

handled it diplomatically.

Well, what'd you do?

I threw both those guys out.

candy concession. That means a raise in all the Milky Ways I can eat.

With those teeth, you can cost them a fortune.

Now, wait a minute.

There's probably something even more bigger than that.

Mr. Carter's probably going to retire.

Probably wants to make me the manager.

Imagine me, Brother J .J., manager of the Lakeshore

Theater.

I've been your cashier for 18 years, Mr. Carter. I didn't think the Lakeshore

Theater would ever close.

Neither did I, Edna, neither did I. But why?

Why? Because the last ten pictures we showed had more people in the cast than

had in the audience.

My mother told me not to go into show business.

Hey, Edna, don't cry.

take over as boss, I'll be a great boss.

Well, Mr. Carter, all set for our big conference?

Should I cut off the phones?

It's already been taken care of.

Good thinking, Mr. Carter, good thinking.

Mr. Carter, you know, I appreciate this confidence you have in me, and rest

assured, whatever it is you want me to do, I'm willing to go all...

You certainly will.

I like you, J .J. And I like you, too.

Now, listen, J .J.

Starting today, there'll be a new sign on the marquee.

Closed permanently.

Oh, new disaster film?

Who's in it? You.

Try to cheer up, Daddy.

Yeah, and I can earn my lunch money by picking up empty deposit bottles.

Now, listen, both of you, I appreciate what you kids are trying to do, but

there's one thing I want you to remember.

I'm the breadwinner in this family. If there's going to be anybody slicing the

loaf, it's going to be me here.

Hey, gang.

Well, just as I promised y 'all, the financial hole in this family has been

plugged. You got a raise?

No, I got fired.

Well,

I got something better. Our money problems are over.

Junior, you ain't making no sense.

I am making sense.

Family, are y 'all ready for this?

I, James Evans, Jr., have enlisted in the United States Army.

You did

what? I enlisted in the Army, Dad.

Junior, I ain't in the mood for none of your jokes now.

I ain't joking, Dad. I'm all signed up and everything.

Daddy, he's serious.

Junior, are you crazy?

Boy, what you gonna do in the Army? You scared of your own shadow?

What little there is of it.

JJ, what outfit they gonna put you in? The lean beret?

Go ahead, make fun, little sister, but I have you know I'm a natural soldier,

born with a military mind.

Yeah, you got a military mind, all right. Them Nats is marching in close

here.

You ain't nothing but a kid.

But, Dad, the Army builds men.

Yeah, but first you got to bring them all the parts.

Dad, the Army will snap me right up, especially when they hear about my

record. What combat record?

I'll have you know I've seen every John Wayne war movie ever made.

Going in as a hero, huh?

No, I'm willing to work my way up. I'll start off as G .I .J .J. P .F .C.

M .O .U.

This army stuff ain't no game, boy. This is serious business.

You ain't ready for it yet.

But, Dad, you went into the army at my age.

Yeah, well, see, I got an invitation to the Korean War.

In them days, Uncle Sam wasn't taking no for an answer.

J .J., you've never been away from home before.

That's the good part.

I get a chance to see the world for free.

Chicks in every country will stay up all night just to get a touch of kid

dynamite.

They let you choose where you want to go.

Yeah, and you know what your choice is going to be? Death Valley or Iceland?

Well, I hear that Iceland's kind of nice in the spring.

Yeah, if you're a snowball, which you ain't.

But, Junior, you ain't going in the Army, and that's all there is to it. I

you couldn't even make it through basic training. Boy, you ain't never had it

that tough.

Couldn't be any tougher than living in this neighborhood.

No? But when's the last time you went on a 10 -mile hike?

The last time the elevator broke down.

with live ammunition flying over your head. Do it every Wednesday.

Only way to get home to school after the warlords and the Satanites get down.

Junior, how about not seeing a girl for 12 whole weeks, huh?

Oh, no!

Oh, dear.

That's truly an inhumane punishment.

But I guess the chicks will just have to make the sacrifice.

She might as well forget that.

Wait a minute now, Dad.

I've never disobeyed you.

But the Army says I'm old enough.

I don't need your permission.

Now, wait a minute, son. Hold it.

Your mother ain't here, Junior. How are you going to make a decision like that

without her being here?

Well, it's a good thing that she's not. She probably would try to stop me.

Then why are you doing it, son?

Well, Dad, somebody's got to do something. I mean, things are tough.

In the Army, I'll be making $344 a month, plus room and board.

I could send that home, and I'd be one less mouth for you to feed.

I just stopped by to let you all know what I was doing, tell you all the good

news.

Well, I'm going down to take my physical.

Junior! I'm sorry, Dad.

He's joining up because I lost my job.

Daddy, he didn't say that.

He ain't got the baby, girl. I mean, I know the truth.

Oh, Daddy, you know we love you. Yeah, Daddy, it's not your fault.

It happens to people all over.

You said yourself the unemployment figure was 8 .3.

Well, I bet among black men, it's over 20%. For black men in this house, it's

100%. Oh, the economy's got me jammed in the middle. It's causing my family to

break up, and there ain't a damn thing I can do about it. Come on, Daddy, stop

worrying. Let me fix you something to eat.

Please, Thelma.

answer. Probably just some more bad news.

Hello?

Yes, just a minute.

Daddy, it's for you. It's Brady's.

Brady's. Them jive time rascals. Probably want their paycheck back from

week.

Yeah?

What?

Oh, man, you jiving.

Well, all right!

Got my job back. I'm working again.

Yeah, it seemed like the personnel manager made a mistake.

Lord, I want to thank you for helping me out.

Now, don't you all tell your mother I said that. She'd be wanting to drag me

church every Sunday.

Oh, Lord, I got to stop Junior before he'd take that physical.

Daddy, how can you? It's too late.

No, it ain't. Not if he didn't get sworn in yet. See, you ain't in the army

until you raise your right hand and take that oath. I'll see you all.

Hey, wait a minute. What induction center did he say he was going to?

Um, uh, he didn't say.

Oh, I'll find it. I got to find it.

talk this over?

a chest x -ray.

Well, I know that can't hurt.

Now face the wall, Evans.

I

can't

find your chest.

Just relax, Evans.

Who's that for?

I have to take some blood.

From who?

Well, I'd like to have it from you.

I'd like to have a second opinion.

Uh, couldn't we wait till I cut myself shaving?

fast as you can until I tell you to stop.

I've been to three induction centers looking for my kid. I gotta stop him

he takes the oath.

Please, I can't have this man's heart.

That's because it stopped beating.

I got my job back. I'm working again. You ain't got to join up.

Would you mind repeating that? I said I got my job back, son. I'm working again.

Everything's going to be fine. You ain't got to join the army.

Honest? Honest!

Now...

Good times is recorded on tape before a live audience.

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