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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,960 Ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, Ba-ba-ba-ba 2 00:00:03,960 --> 00:00:06,320 Ba-ba-ba-ba 3 00:00:06,320 --> 00:00:08,960 When the world In which you're living 4 00:00:08,960 --> 00:00:12,160 Gets a bit too much to bear 5 00:00:12,160 --> 00:00:17,960 And you need someone to lean on When you look there's no-one there 6 00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:23,960 You're gonna find me Out in the country 7 00:00:23,960 --> 00:00:29,480 You're gonna find me Way out in the country. 8 00:00:38,068 --> 00:00:40,428 Yes! Got my driving licence back. Good. 9 00:00:40,428 --> 00:00:42,388 Try and keep it a bit longer this time. 10 00:00:42,388 --> 00:00:45,388 It's a known fact those speed cameras can be wrongly calibrated. 11 00:00:45,388 --> 00:00:47,388 And you had the bad luck to find four of them. 12 00:00:47,388 --> 00:00:48,388 Must have been a duff batch. 13 00:00:48,388 --> 00:00:52,388 Well, then, the whole of Leeds would have got 12 points on their licence, 14 00:00:52,388 --> 00:00:54,388 whereas it was just you. You're worse than the magistrate. 15 00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:56,388 Still blaming her, are you? She had it in for me. 16 00:00:56,388 --> 00:00:58,388 Obviously with hindsight, 17 00:00:58,388 --> 00:01:01,068 I wouldn't have been so rude about caravan owners. 18 00:01:01,068 --> 00:01:02,388 How was I to know she had one? 19 00:01:02,592 --> 00:01:05,592 Anyway, from now on, I am sticking to the speed limit. 20 00:01:05,592 --> 00:01:07,992 Which is, on a country road...? 21 00:01:08,529 --> 00:01:11,529 It varies. It certainly does when you're driving. 22 00:01:11,529 --> 00:01:13,569 You're like a changed man when you get behind the wheel. 23 00:01:13,943 --> 00:01:15,903 You're an addict. I'm not. 24 00:01:16,184 --> 00:01:20,184 I'm not! So, anyway, do we need anything from the shop? No. 25 00:01:20,184 --> 00:01:22,184 I think we've got everything we need. 26 00:01:22,184 --> 00:01:24,184 Except a roof, but I don't think they sell those. 27 00:01:24,677 --> 00:01:27,677 I know, why don't we drive over and see your dad? 28 00:01:27,677 --> 00:01:30,277 My dad? You want to go and see my dad? 29 00:01:30,364 --> 00:01:31,364 Yeah, I do. 30 00:01:31,872 --> 00:01:34,872 Well, luckily, he's coming over here later. 31 00:01:34,872 --> 00:01:36,262 Apparently, he's got some good news. 32 00:01:36,294 --> 00:01:37,694 Oh, yeah? How long's he got? 33 00:01:37,708 --> 00:01:39,708 Oi! He is my dad. 34 00:01:43,523 --> 00:01:45,883 You are looking at the new president 35 00:01:45,883 --> 00:01:48,523 of the Garthdale and District Bowls Club. 36 00:01:48,523 --> 00:01:50,883 Well done, Dad. Congratulations, Ken. 37 00:01:50,883 --> 00:01:52,523 43 votes to 7. 38 00:01:52,523 --> 00:01:55,523 Third biggest margin in the history of the club, apparently. 39 00:01:55,523 --> 00:01:57,043 That's amazing. 40 00:01:57,994 --> 00:01:59,494 I mean, expected, but amazing. 41 00:02:00,548 --> 00:02:04,148 Seven votes. Poor old Ralph Norris. 42 00:02:04,189 --> 00:02:08,249 I don't think the committee was ready for a transgender president. 43 00:02:08,330 --> 00:02:10,210 Is Ralph Norris transgender? 44 00:02:10,244 --> 00:02:11,404 No, of course not. 45 00:02:11,404 --> 00:02:15,004 But that's the rumour that someoneput about. Dad, that's terrible. 46 00:02:15,052 --> 00:02:18,052 He had it coming. Ever since he spiked the tea at the whist drive. 47 00:02:18,052 --> 00:02:20,052 28 quid I lost. 48 00:02:20,052 --> 00:02:23,052 Dennis Brigstock was sick into his hat on the bus home. 49 00:02:23,052 --> 00:02:25,352 Nice. So is there gonna be a party? 50 00:02:25,490 --> 00:02:28,530 A party? There's an official inauguration ceremony, 51 00:02:28,530 --> 00:02:30,010 this Saturday. 52 00:02:30,010 --> 00:02:31,490 Brass band, photographer, the lot. 53 00:02:31,787 --> 00:02:36,787 On which subject, how would you like a bit of gardening work? 54 00:02:36,787 --> 00:02:37,787 What, at the Bowls Club? 55 00:02:37,787 --> 00:02:41,307 No, Kew Gardens (!) Where do you think I mean?That'd be great, Dad. 56 00:02:41,307 --> 00:02:43,787 I mean, I haven't got any experience of bowling greens... 57 00:02:43,787 --> 00:02:45,787 No, I don't mean the green. That's the groundsman's job. 58 00:02:45,787 --> 00:02:48,387 Yeah, come on, Nicky. Sacred turf! 59 00:02:48,419 --> 00:02:50,119 It's like the centre court at Wimbledon (!) 60 00:02:50,138 --> 00:02:51,478 It's more sacred than that. 61 00:02:51,771 --> 00:02:54,171 We wouldn't let Andy Murray slide around on our green. 62 00:02:54,212 --> 00:02:55,372 He'd be out on his ear. 63 00:02:55,372 --> 00:02:58,212 Him and his mother! What have you got against Judy? 64 00:02:58,212 --> 00:02:59,892 No, I'm just saying. 65 00:02:59,892 --> 00:03:02,372 The bowling green is a specialist job. 66 00:03:02,372 --> 00:03:04,372 Now, do you want this work or not? 67 00:03:07,028 --> 00:03:09,028 You don't have to give me a lift. It's no trouble. 68 00:03:09,028 --> 00:03:10,868 I'll just drop you off and I'll go to the shop. 69 00:03:11,059 --> 00:03:13,419 We don't need anything. We do, I remembered. 70 00:03:13,419 --> 00:03:16,219 I've run out of envelopes. A4 envelopes. 71 00:03:16,219 --> 00:03:17,219 Have you (?) Yes. 72 00:03:17,219 --> 00:03:19,219 I know you. As soon as you're on your own, 73 00:03:19,219 --> 00:03:21,259 you will be racing round the lanes at 80 mph. 74 00:03:21,259 --> 00:03:23,219 I will not. 75 00:03:23,219 --> 00:03:26,519 Anyway, I don't think this could do 80. Well, let's not find out. 76 00:03:26,521 --> 00:03:28,521 ALL: Coo-ee! Oh! 77 00:03:28,521 --> 00:03:30,521 Glad we caught you. We were just wondering... 78 00:03:30,521 --> 00:03:33,021 Would you mind if we picked some of those nettles?Please do. 79 00:03:33,052 --> 00:03:35,052 I was gonna spray them with weedkiller. 80 00:03:35,052 --> 00:03:37,052 We don't like weedkiller. Neither do nettles. 81 00:03:37,052 --> 00:03:39,052 That's why I was gonna spray it on them. 82 00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:40,572 Hm. That's a pity, Steve. 83 00:03:40,572 --> 00:03:42,052 Nettles are a really good food source. 84 00:03:42,052 --> 00:03:46,052 Meena's been given this amazing recipe book.Ta-da! 85 00:03:46,268 --> 00:03:49,768 "101 Things To Do With Nettles." Look at that, Steve. 86 00:03:49,823 --> 00:03:51,823 You can make nettle tea. Nettle soup. 87 00:03:51,823 --> 00:03:53,423 Nettle quiche. Nettle smoothies. 88 00:03:53,454 --> 00:03:55,374 Nettle risotto. Nettle loaf. 89 00:03:55,408 --> 00:03:57,888 BOTH: Nettle porridge. Nettle scones. 90 00:03:58,384 --> 00:04:01,684 Yeah, like it says, 101 things.So, do you mind if we help ourselves? 91 00:04:02,150 --> 00:04:04,150 Pick as many as you like. 92 00:04:04,150 --> 00:04:07,150 CHEERING Nettles are our friends! 93 00:04:07,150 --> 00:04:09,150 Well, you go and play with them, then. 94 00:04:10,583 --> 00:04:14,583 Yum, nettle porridge (!) The fun never stops at their house. 95 00:04:14,583 --> 00:04:15,583 I can think of another recipe. 96 00:04:15,583 --> 00:04:18,083 Take one bunch of stinging nettles and shove them up Matt's... 97 00:04:18,098 --> 00:04:19,898 HORN TOOTS Yeah, all right. 98 00:04:19,919 --> 00:04:21,439 TOOTING CONTINUES 99 00:04:21,439 --> 00:04:22,919 I'm not having this. Steve... 100 00:04:22,919 --> 00:04:24,919 Oh, come off it. I can't let him get away with that. 101 00:04:24,919 --> 00:04:27,519 INSISTENT TOOTING 102 00:04:27,591 --> 00:04:29,591 Just stick to the speed limit. 103 00:04:29,591 --> 00:04:31,591 Really (?) 104 00:04:31,591 --> 00:04:33,591 Just pull over and let him go past. 105 00:04:37,257 --> 00:04:38,457 Oh. 106 00:04:38,457 --> 00:04:40,257 Steve, Nicky. All right, Grizzo. 107 00:04:40,257 --> 00:04:41,257 Oh, it's you. 108 00:04:41,257 --> 00:04:43,257 Didn't you hear me? I've been going like this: 109 00:04:43,257 --> 00:04:44,257 HORN TOOTS 110 00:04:44,257 --> 00:04:47,597 You kept speeding up. I thought, "Hello, he wants a race." 111 00:04:47,660 --> 00:04:49,920 No, he doesn't want a race. 112 00:04:49,980 --> 00:04:52,980 No. That is a lovely car, though. 113 00:04:52,980 --> 00:04:55,660 This? Yeah, bit of a weird one. 114 00:04:55,660 --> 00:04:58,980 I was in Turin, plugging a new album, and they just give me it. 115 00:04:58,980 --> 00:05:00,980 I had to drive it all the way home. 116 00:05:00,980 --> 00:05:04,380 It didn't take long, to be fair. You should borrow it some time. 117 00:05:10,043 --> 00:05:14,363 Steve?I know. Mirror, signal, manoeuvre. Hm. 118 00:05:23,310 --> 00:05:25,110 I'll pick you up at five. 119 00:05:25,152 --> 00:05:26,652 You sure you don't want anything from the shop? 120 00:05:26,613 --> 00:05:29,613 See if you can get a smile out of Shannon.She's not that bad. 121 00:05:29,613 --> 00:05:31,613 I think a lot of it might be your attitude. 122 00:05:31,613 --> 00:05:34,133 MY attitude? 123 00:05:43,277 --> 00:05:44,277 Hiya, how's it going? 124 00:05:44,996 --> 00:05:47,996 Oh! I'm good, thanks. How are you, Shannon? 125 00:05:47,996 --> 00:05:50,836 Do you mind? I'm on t'phone to me sister. 126 00:05:50,836 --> 00:05:53,996 I'll take you off speakerphone. Right. 127 00:05:53,996 --> 00:05:55,996 Sorry about that, Caz. 128 00:05:55,996 --> 00:05:57,996 Customer came in and started talking at me. 129 00:05:58,694 --> 00:06:01,654 No, the new ones. What bought house in the Dip. 130 00:06:03,177 --> 00:06:07,677 I know. LAUGHS 131 00:06:18,474 --> 00:06:20,174 Look at that. 132 00:06:20,161 --> 00:06:22,801 Never mind bowls, we could play billiards on that. 133 00:06:22,801 --> 00:06:24,961 Do you want me to dig some holes in the corners, then? 134 00:06:24,961 --> 00:06:28,161 Don't you set foot on it. Anyway, you've got your work cut out. 135 00:06:28,161 --> 00:06:30,961 These hedges want doing, the tubs need sorting. 136 00:06:30,961 --> 00:06:33,961 I want it looking top-notch in time for my inauguration. 137 00:06:33,961 --> 00:06:37,601 Well, best crack on, then. So why did the last gardener leave? 138 00:06:37,670 --> 00:06:39,830 Have you met our club secretary? 139 00:06:39,830 --> 00:06:42,670 Terry, this is my daughter, Nicky. 140 00:06:42,670 --> 00:06:44,830 Pleased to meet you. Do you bowl? 141 00:06:44,830 --> 00:06:47,430 No, I don't. That's a shame. 142 00:06:47,478 --> 00:06:49,478 We did have a father and daughter team 143 00:06:49,478 --> 00:06:51,318 who were runners-up in the mixed pairs. 144 00:06:51,318 --> 00:06:53,478 That was in the Eldritch Cup in 1986. 145 00:06:53,478 --> 00:06:56,678 And then the following year, they played separately. 146 00:06:56,678 --> 00:06:57,998 Bob was in the men's pairs, 147 00:06:57,998 --> 00:07:02,158 Liz was in the ladies pairs. And guess what? 148 00:07:02,158 --> 00:07:04,478 They both came runners-up. Again! 149 00:07:04,478 --> 00:07:06,478 ALL LAUGH Really? 150 00:07:06,478 --> 00:07:08,478 Right, well, I'll leave you to it, then. 151 00:07:08,478 --> 00:07:10,978 Good luck. 152 00:07:11,056 --> 00:07:14,056 So, you don't bowl at all? 153 00:07:20,509 --> 00:07:24,509 No, it were an infected toenail. I did. 154 00:07:24,939 --> 00:07:27,939 He gave me some tablets, but I came out in a rash. 155 00:07:27,939 --> 00:07:30,939 I thought I'd leave it alone for a few days.All right? 156 00:07:30,939 --> 00:07:31,939 Hi, Bronson. 157 00:07:31,939 --> 00:07:34,939 Erm, you don't happen to know if you've... 158 00:07:36,939 --> 00:07:39,939 Oh. Breakfast? Yeah. 159 00:07:41,779 --> 00:07:44,939 What - that just goes back on the shelf, does it? Huh. 160 00:07:44,939 --> 00:07:47,939 You don't happen to know if you've got any of those, erm... 161 00:07:51,415 --> 00:07:52,415 ..A4 envelopes? 162 00:07:56,197 --> 00:07:58,197 I don't know. Ask me mum. 163 00:07:59,251 --> 00:08:01,251 Thanks for your help, anyway. 164 00:08:01,251 --> 00:08:04,251 The nail popped off like a bottle top. Yeah. 165 00:08:04,251 --> 00:08:06,251 The sock had fused with the scab. 166 00:08:12,771 --> 00:08:16,451 Now, he also had a Honda Civic, but it was a 1.6 litre 167 00:08:16,451 --> 00:08:19,251 and he couldn't get used to the clutch on it. 168 00:08:19,251 --> 00:08:22,251 He lived on a road with quite a steep gradient. 169 00:08:22,251 --> 00:08:23,251 Did he? 170 00:08:23,251 --> 00:08:27,451 Eventually, he traded it in for a Ford Mondeo Estate. 171 00:08:27,451 --> 00:08:29,251 Terry, I really must get on. 172 00:08:29,251 --> 00:08:32,251 Shouldn't you be cutting that back a bit further? 173 00:08:34,251 --> 00:08:36,251 Yeah. Right. 174 00:08:39,775 --> 00:08:42,775 Bye. Sorry to bother you... Bye, then. 175 00:08:44,775 --> 00:08:46,775 Do you have any A4 envelopes? 176 00:08:46,775 --> 00:08:48,455 Don't stock 'em. 177 00:08:48,455 --> 00:08:50,775 Is there a reason for that? 178 00:08:50,775 --> 00:08:52,815 Gareth! 179 00:08:52,815 --> 00:08:56,775 Is there a reason we don't stock A4 envelopes? 180 00:08:56,775 --> 00:08:59,275 GARETH: No! 181 00:08:59,353 --> 00:09:02,353 Someone wants A4 envelopes! 182 00:09:02,353 --> 00:09:04,353 Why don't we stock 'em? 183 00:09:04,353 --> 00:09:06,353 There's no demand! 184 00:09:06,353 --> 00:09:09,353 There's no demand. Well... 185 00:09:09,353 --> 00:09:12,193 You could try the superstore over at Redborough. 186 00:09:12,193 --> 00:09:14,713 It's a bit of a drive, but they've got everything there.Ah. 187 00:09:14,908 --> 00:09:18,548 That's a good idea. Thank you, Alice. See? 188 00:09:18,548 --> 00:09:20,228 You've lost yourself a customer. 189 00:09:20,228 --> 00:09:22,548 You're only a customer if you buy something. 190 00:09:22,548 --> 00:09:25,548 Yeah, and the reason I didn't buy something is... 191 00:09:25,548 --> 00:09:28,548 Anyway, I'm gonna drive to the superstore. 192 00:09:28,548 --> 00:09:31,548 In that case, could I come with you? There's a couple of things I need. 193 00:09:39,102 --> 00:09:41,102 It's further than I remember. 194 00:09:43,622 --> 00:09:46,622 Can't you go any faster? Yes, I could, 195 00:09:46,622 --> 00:09:49,102 but the speed limit's there for a reason. 196 00:09:53,102 --> 00:09:55,102 Oh, would you mind turning round? 197 00:09:55,102 --> 00:09:56,622 Sorry? 198 00:09:56,622 --> 00:09:58,102 I forgot me carrier bags. 199 00:09:58,102 --> 00:10:00,102 It's all right, I've got plenty in the boot. 200 00:10:00,102 --> 00:10:03,102 They charge you for them these days. 201 00:10:03,102 --> 00:10:06,102 Yeah, I know. But like I say... 202 00:10:10,102 --> 00:10:12,102 I'm going to need quite a few. 203 00:10:12,102 --> 00:10:14,302 I've got a boot load of them. 204 00:10:16,673 --> 00:10:18,673 Are you sure you've got enough? 205 00:10:18,673 --> 00:10:20,673 Alice, I promise you 206 00:10:20,673 --> 00:10:22,673 I've got more carrier bags than a dolphin's stomach. 207 00:10:26,673 --> 00:10:28,673 It's further than I remember. 208 00:10:28,673 --> 00:10:31,713 It certainly feels like it. 209 00:10:35,193 --> 00:10:37,673 INAUDIBLE CHATTING 210 00:11:00,673 --> 00:11:03,673 I'm just checking I've got everything on my list. 211 00:11:03,673 --> 00:11:06,673 I really think you have, Alice. I'm stocking up for the winter. 212 00:11:06,673 --> 00:11:09,673 Who are you expecting, the Russian Army? 213 00:11:09,673 --> 00:11:11,673 Oh! Gravy granules. 214 00:11:11,673 --> 00:11:13,673 Er, no... 215 00:11:14,673 --> 00:11:17,673 Got them. So, shall we get in the car? 216 00:11:17,673 --> 00:11:20,673 Those are beef. I wanted chicken as well. 217 00:11:20,673 --> 00:11:22,673 Beef gravy goes really nicely with chicken. 218 00:11:22,673 --> 00:11:24,673 It's not the same. 219 00:11:26,478 --> 00:11:28,118 If you wouldn't mind... 220 00:11:28,462 --> 00:11:29,462 Right. 221 00:11:43,462 --> 00:11:46,162 Sorry, sorry. Where have you been? 222 00:11:46,298 --> 00:11:47,498 I've been sat here 45 minutes! 223 00:11:47,498 --> 00:11:50,298 I had to go to the superstore in Redborough. 224 00:11:50,298 --> 00:11:51,498 What? Oh, I see. 225 00:11:51,498 --> 00:11:53,298 The one that's a nice long drive away, 226 00:11:53,298 --> 00:11:55,658 over the moors on the empty road. 227 00:11:55,658 --> 00:11:57,298 How did it go, Stig? 228 00:11:57,298 --> 00:12:00,098 I got roped into taking Alice. She was in there for hours. 229 00:12:00,134 --> 00:12:02,174 Ended up with eight tons of tinned goods in the back of the car. 230 00:12:02,174 --> 00:12:05,334 It was like working for the Red Cross. Didn't you get my text? 231 00:12:05,334 --> 00:12:07,434 I did, but I couldn't read it cos I was driving. 232 00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:09,012 At the correct speed. 233 00:12:09,028 --> 00:12:11,986 Go and ask Alice. She might invite you in for a cup of gravy. 234 00:12:11,986 --> 00:12:15,337 All right, I believe you.I told you, my speeding days are over. 235 00:12:15,337 --> 00:12:17,654 HORN BLARES 236 00:12:18,310 --> 00:12:19,790 Steve! Nicky! 237 00:12:20,115 --> 00:12:21,115 Hi, Grizzo. 238 00:12:21,115 --> 00:12:24,315 Steve, when are you gonna take this for a spin, then? 239 00:12:24,349 --> 00:12:28,029 Very kind of you. I'd better not. Thanks, anyway. 240 00:12:28,029 --> 00:12:30,349 All right. Well, if you change your mind... 241 00:12:31,214 --> 00:12:33,214 You know you want to. 242 00:12:37,589 --> 00:12:39,429 REVS ENGINE 243 00:12:42,105 --> 00:12:45,105 Ba, ba-ba-ba-ba... 244 00:12:45,412 --> 00:12:48,912 Ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, Ba-ba-ba-ba... 245 00:12:52,412 --> 00:12:55,252 Salad, Ken? Thanks. 246 00:12:56,412 --> 00:12:59,772 We'd offer you some nettles, only Matt and Meena have eaten them all. 247 00:13:00,924 --> 00:13:03,619 So, how did you get on at the club? 248 00:13:03,619 --> 00:13:04,779 Yeah, nearly done. 249 00:13:04,779 --> 00:13:07,463 I'd have finished today if it wasn't for your club secretary. 250 00:13:07,463 --> 00:13:11,019 Ah, yes. Tedious Terry. Sorry about him. 251 00:13:11,019 --> 00:13:14,238 Did he tell you about his barometer collection? He did. 252 00:13:14,238 --> 00:13:16,238 And his bloody snuff boxes. 253 00:13:16,621 --> 00:13:19,621 Whatever you do, don't mention Commonwealth stamps. 254 00:13:19,621 --> 00:13:21,058 Or you'll be there till Christmas. 255 00:13:21,058 --> 00:13:23,035 What time is the inauguration ceremony? 256 00:13:23,035 --> 00:13:25,191 Six thirty. Should be a good night. 257 00:13:25,191 --> 00:13:28,371 There's gonna be a barbecue and a disco later. 258 00:13:28,371 --> 00:13:30,371 No doubt a few pints will be had! 259 00:13:30,371 --> 00:13:33,255 Let's just say I've ordered a cab. 260 00:13:33,255 --> 00:13:37,455 Actually, I was thinking, Ken, I've got my driving licence back... 261 00:13:37,794 --> 00:13:40,594 Oh, dear. Nigel Mansell's back at the wheel, is he? 262 00:13:40,594 --> 00:13:41,594 Lock up your pheasants! 263 00:13:41,594 --> 00:13:43,594 To be fair, he has stuck to the speed limit. 264 00:13:43,594 --> 00:13:46,366 He's a reformed character. That's what they said about Bronson. 265 00:13:46,366 --> 00:13:49,366 The day before he set fire to the mobile library. 266 00:13:49,889 --> 00:13:52,889 Anyway, I was gonna offer you a lift. 267 00:13:52,889 --> 00:13:54,702 A lift? 268 00:13:54,702 --> 00:13:58,225 It'll save you the cost of a cab and I don't mind not drinking. 269 00:13:58,225 --> 00:13:59,952 Well, if you're sure. 270 00:13:59,952 --> 00:14:02,647 There you go, Dad. It's your big night. 271 00:14:02,647 --> 00:14:04,123 It's the least I can do. 272 00:14:04,123 --> 00:14:06,963 ENGINE REVVING 273 00:14:10,601 --> 00:14:12,601 You ready, Nicky? Yeah, I'm coming. 274 00:14:12,601 --> 00:14:14,601 You having fun? 275 00:14:14,601 --> 00:14:16,601 We're wearing magic gloves. 276 00:14:16,601 --> 00:14:19,121 Aren't those just ordinary washing-up gloves? 277 00:14:21,416 --> 00:14:23,216 I was just saying to Meena, 278 00:14:23,216 --> 00:14:25,216 I can't believe you haven't picked these nettles yourselves. 279 00:14:25,216 --> 00:14:27,237 I made some soup with the first batch. 280 00:14:27,237 --> 00:14:29,397 Gonna treat ourselves to a nice hot bowl when we get home. 281 00:14:29,397 --> 00:14:31,397 Mm, yummy... WHISPERING 282 00:14:31,397 --> 00:14:33,397 Is he all right? 283 00:14:33,397 --> 00:14:36,077 Silas was wondering if Steve is going to keep the engine on 284 00:14:36,077 --> 00:14:37,237 while we're talking. 285 00:14:37,237 --> 00:14:39,397 It's bad for the planet. And for little lungs. 286 00:14:39,397 --> 00:14:43,087 Eh, Pips? COUGHS 287 00:14:43,087 --> 00:14:46,087 You're all right. We're going anyway or I'll be late for work. 288 00:14:47,165 --> 00:14:49,165 Mind you don't sting yourselves. 289 00:14:56,767 --> 00:14:59,767 Now, the interesting thing about Fiji 290 00:14:59,767 --> 00:15:05,978 is they left the Commonwealth in 1987 and rejoined in 1997. 291 00:15:05,978 --> 00:15:08,458 Did they? Now, if you don't mind... 292 00:15:08,458 --> 00:15:11,978 So, should I collect the stamps issued in the interim period 293 00:15:11,978 --> 00:15:13,458 or should I not? 294 00:15:20,137 --> 00:15:23,137 RIFF FROM SMOKE ON THE WATER PLAYS 295 00:15:29,029 --> 00:15:30,989 Hey, Steve! I like the door chime. 296 00:15:30,989 --> 00:15:33,989 It's good, innit? Did you see the effects? 297 00:15:33,989 --> 00:15:35,989 What? Press it again. 298 00:15:35,989 --> 00:15:37,989 RIFF PLAYS AGAIN 299 00:15:37,989 --> 00:15:39,509 Look behind you. 300 00:15:44,536 --> 00:15:47,536 Smoke On The Water. Get it? Yeah. With the music and the... 301 00:15:47,536 --> 00:15:49,536 It's very clever. 302 00:15:49,536 --> 00:15:50,736 I was gonna do Purple Rain. 303 00:15:50,736 --> 00:15:53,536 Press the doorbell and you get sprayed with Ribena. 304 00:15:53,536 --> 00:15:55,536 But thought it might get a bit messy. 305 00:15:55,536 --> 00:15:57,536 You wouldn't want the Osmonds turning up, would you? 306 00:15:57,536 --> 00:15:59,536 Eh? 307 00:15:59,536 --> 00:16:01,376 Didn't they use to wear white suits? 308 00:16:01,376 --> 00:16:03,536 I don't know what you're talking about, Steve. 309 00:16:03,536 --> 00:16:05,536 No, fair enough. I've got a favour to ask. 310 00:16:05,536 --> 00:16:07,536 Yeah, come in. 311 00:16:10,950 --> 00:16:17,106 Whereas Australia didn't issue its first postage stamp until 1913. 312 00:16:17,106 --> 00:16:19,106 Terry, I really must get this finished. 313 00:16:19,106 --> 00:16:21,106 Those shears look a bit blunt to me. 314 00:16:21,106 --> 00:16:24,106 I'll go and get you the sharpening stone. 315 00:16:24,106 --> 00:16:26,106 Honestly... It's no trouble. 316 00:16:26,106 --> 00:16:30,106 Now, Canada's first stamp was the first stamp 317 00:16:30,106 --> 00:16:35,106 anywhere in the world to feature an animal rather than a monarch, 318 00:16:35,106 --> 00:16:37,106 and can you guess what that animal was? 319 00:16:42,106 --> 00:16:44,106 Hello? KNOCKING ON DOOR 320 00:16:51,106 --> 00:16:55,306 And then maybe we can make some nettle scones.Yay! 321 00:16:55,306 --> 00:16:58,106 Stand back, everyone. Gas guzzler approaching. 322 00:17:05,106 --> 00:17:07,106 COUGHING 323 00:17:09,942 --> 00:17:12,942 Yep, that's not too shabby. Not bad at all. 324 00:17:12,942 --> 00:17:13,942 Thanks, Dad. 325 00:17:13,942 --> 00:17:14,825 KNOCKING AT DOOR 326 00:17:14,825 --> 00:17:16,345 What's that banging noise? Banging? 327 00:17:16,345 --> 00:17:18,825 Coming from in here. 328 00:17:20,825 --> 00:17:22,865 Hello, Terry. What are you doing in there? 329 00:17:22,865 --> 00:17:25,825 I wondered where you'd got to. Did you not hear me? 330 00:17:25,825 --> 00:17:28,345 No, sorry. I had these on. 331 00:17:28,345 --> 00:17:32,825 I was talking to you when I went in. Then the door just slammed shut. 332 00:17:32,825 --> 00:17:34,825 Oh, strange. I wonder how that happened? 333 00:17:34,825 --> 00:17:36,825 It's a complete mystery. 334 00:17:37,825 --> 00:17:39,825 It was a beaver. What? 335 00:17:39,825 --> 00:17:43,164 The animal on the Canadian stamp. A beaver. 336 00:17:45,139 --> 00:17:48,561 "Not too shabby." Pretty good, coming from your dad. 337 00:17:48,561 --> 00:17:51,201 That's a five-star review from him. 338 00:17:51,201 --> 00:17:54,201 So what time did we say we'd pick him up? About 6 o'clock. 339 00:17:54,201 --> 00:17:56,787 What's Grizzo doing here? Ah, now... 340 00:17:56,787 --> 00:17:58,373 Hang on, where's our car? 341 00:17:58,373 --> 00:18:01,144 I was gonna talk to you about all that. 342 00:18:01,144 --> 00:18:03,184 Were you? 343 00:18:06,089 --> 00:18:08,089 TOOTS HORN 344 00:18:18,089 --> 00:18:21,089 Very nice. Italian. 345 00:18:21,089 --> 00:18:23,089 This certainly beats Garthdale Minicabs. 346 00:18:23,089 --> 00:18:29,089 Nobody's thrown up in the ashtray, for a start. Was this your idea? 347 00:18:29,089 --> 00:18:30,609 No. It was all Steve's. 348 00:18:30,609 --> 00:18:34,089 Hey, I bet this can shift. Oh, yes. 349 00:18:34,089 --> 00:18:37,089 Twin turbo, nought to 60 in four seconds. 350 00:18:37,089 --> 00:18:38,089 Top speed of 190. 351 00:18:38,089 --> 00:18:42,129 Not that I feel the need to prove it. Those days are behind me. 352 00:18:42,129 --> 00:18:45,276 Just wait till Ralph Norris sees me pull up in this. 353 00:18:45,276 --> 00:18:47,089 He'll never live it down. 354 00:18:51,824 --> 00:18:53,824 He's two minutes late, Ralph. 355 00:18:55,864 --> 00:18:58,824 APPLAUSE 356 00:19:05,344 --> 00:19:07,504 Thanks for this, Steve. 357 00:19:07,504 --> 00:19:09,504 You're welcome, Ken. 358 00:19:13,504 --> 00:19:16,504 BRASS BAND STARTS PLAYING 359 00:19:16,504 --> 00:19:18,504 MUSIC: 'For He's A Jolly Good Fellow' 360 00:19:22,270 --> 00:19:24,270 Afternoon, Ralph. 361 00:19:28,020 --> 00:19:30,020 Thank you. 362 00:19:30,020 --> 00:19:32,020 LAUGHTER AND CHATTING 363 00:19:32,801 --> 00:19:36,160 I must say, Ken, the grounds are in great shape. 364 00:19:36,160 --> 00:19:38,629 Well, that's how it's gonna be on my watch, Terry. 365 00:19:38,629 --> 00:19:42,629 In fact, it's the best it's looked since 1994, 366 00:19:42,629 --> 00:19:46,032 when Bob Patterson was president. Now, interestingly... 367 00:19:46,032 --> 00:19:47,032 EVERYONE GROANS 368 00:19:47,032 --> 00:19:49,055 Give it a rest, or you'll get locked up in that shed again. 369 00:19:49,055 --> 00:19:51,055 LAUGHTER 370 00:19:51,055 --> 00:19:54,055 Nettle scone, anyone? They're gluten free. 371 00:19:54,055 --> 00:19:56,055 Have you got any that are nettle free? 372 00:19:56,055 --> 00:19:58,055 LAUGHTER 373 00:19:58,415 --> 00:20:00,149 Hey, Meena. Where's Matt? 374 00:20:00,149 --> 00:20:01,415 Daddy's not well. 375 00:20:01,415 --> 00:20:03,415 Oh, no. Poor Matt. What's up with him? 376 00:20:03,415 --> 00:20:05,415 It was the nettle soup. We all had some. 377 00:20:05,415 --> 00:20:07,415 It was lovely, wasn't it? 378 00:20:07,415 --> 00:20:09,415 But it turns out Matt's allergic to nettles. 379 00:20:09,415 --> 00:20:12,415 Oh. Allergic to nettles? That is bad luck. 380 00:20:12,415 --> 00:20:15,107 I know. He's being very brave about it. 381 00:20:21,740 --> 00:20:23,740 Stupid bloody nettles! 382 00:20:28,154 --> 00:20:31,154 ENGINE STARTS 383 00:20:37,506 --> 00:20:41,346 MUSIC: 'Smoke On The Water' by Deep Purple 384 00:20:47,842 --> 00:20:49,842 MUSIC STOPS 385 00:20:55,959 --> 00:20:57,919 TYRES SCREECH 386 00:21:41,059 --> 00:21:43,059 Sorry about that. 387 00:21:44,817 --> 00:21:48,833 I think you can still use that bit over there. You know, for... 388 00:21:51,817 --> 00:21:55,017 Ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, Ba-ba-ba-ba 389 00:21:55,017 --> 00:21:57,497 Ba-ba-ba-ba 390 00:21:57,497 --> 00:21:59,817 When the world in Which you're living 391 00:21:59,817 --> 00:22:02,817 Gets a bit too much to bear 392 00:22:02,817 --> 00:22:06,497 And you need someone to lean on 393 00:22:06,497 --> 00:22:08,817 When you look there's no-one there 394 00:22:08,817 --> 00:22:14,817 You're gonna find me Out in the country 395 00:22:14,817 --> 00:22:17,817 You're gonna find me 396 00:22:17,817 --> 00:22:20,817 Way out in the country. 397 00:22:20,817 --> 00:22:21,817 Subtitles by TVT 398 00:22:21,867 --> 00:22:26,417 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 30390

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