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I'll come right in here.
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All right,
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let's go over some preliminaries. First,
your name is Jessica.
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And you are how old?
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I'm 27.
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And you're probably about 107 pounds.
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What's your background?
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Eh, doesn't matter.
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Okay. Now, you said that you were here
because you were in a car accident,
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right? Ugh, yes.
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It was such a freaking ordeal.
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I was slightly distracted, but there was
nobody on the road, so it didn't
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matter. And this woman comes speeding
like a fucking bat out of hell.
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And I didn't see her. She came out of
nowhere, and I hit her. But, I mean, it
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was her fault for speeding anyway.
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Oh, of course, yeah.
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So... But you were on the phone.
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You're like texting, right?
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Well, of course.
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Okay. So that's against the law.
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Duh. Depends on where you're at. Okay.
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Just like it's noon somewhere else. So
do you have any, like, you hurt here?
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You hurt there?
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No, I'm just super stressed out.
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There, there, there. No.
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No, I was just, I just needed to be
stressed after that. I mean.
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So your insurance is going to pay for
this therapy.
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Then you're going to collect a large sum
of money, and then you're going to go,
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I don't know.
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It's like an ice cream sundae.
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Like a vacation.
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Mm -hmm.
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Okay,
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well, I'll tell you what. I'm going to
do my best part to help you out with the
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situation.
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So what I'm going to do is I'm going to
give you a towel, and I'm going to leave
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you privacy. You can take your clothes
off, put the towel over you. I'm going
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go in the other room.
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When you're ready, holler for me, and
I'll come back in.
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All right. Thank you.
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You're ready.
42
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Okay.
43
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So, we'll start with the back,
obviously.
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That's going to be the, probably the
problem area where your tension is going
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be. Yeah. And then, you work on your
front.
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So, let's get this towel off of there.
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Excuse me. That's okay.
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I've seen plenty of butt in my life.
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Okay.
50
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Let's move this hair out of the way.
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I just want you to relax. Close your
eyes.
52
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Pretend you're on the beach in Maui.
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And you've got some big Hawaiian guy
giving you a massage.
54
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I don't know if that's the imagery you
want to put out there.
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Alright, how does that feel?
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It feels good.
57
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It's a little crazy.
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That's a little crazy?
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I'll slow it down.
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How long have you been doing massage
for?
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Sorry? How long have you been doing
massage for?
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Oh, about 7 -8 years.
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How long have you been getting massages?
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Since I was a kid, of course. All right.
65
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Hmm.
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Very good at what I do.
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Lots of happy customers.
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Okay.
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00:05:12,760 --> 00:05:13,760
Excuse me.
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00:05:13,960 --> 00:05:14,960
Yes?
71
00:05:15,280 --> 00:05:16,280
Did you fart?
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No, but let it go.
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Huh?
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Oh, this is all part of the massage.
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I know.
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I know in our Puritan society.
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You know, the butts and the breasts are
considered sexual parts, but they're
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actually just part of the body itself.
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00:05:34,150 --> 00:05:36,430
I mean, these are your gluteus maximus.
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These are actually muscles.
81
00:05:39,570 --> 00:05:42,890
Well, it's your gluteus maximus and then
your hamstring here.
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00:05:43,770 --> 00:05:46,090
Then you have your ITB tendon here.
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It runs from your hip down to the
outside of your thigh.
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And then you have your sphincter.
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Excuse me, no.
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No what?
87
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Are you not happy with my massage?
88
00:05:59,810 --> 00:06:00,649
No.
89
00:06:00,650 --> 00:06:03,790
You've officially gone beyond creeper
status.
90
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What the fuck? This is not a massage.
91
00:06:06,890 --> 00:06:08,550
I'm not here for a happy ending.
92
00:06:08,990 --> 00:06:15,170
Okay, listen. I can't do my job unless
you trust me 100%. Well, right now, I'm
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going to say I don't trust you 100 %
given the fact that you just offered a
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sphincter massage.
95
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No, I didn't offer it.
96
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No. I didn't offer it. No. I didn't
offer it. Listen.
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If you want to get... All the insurance
that you can, and you want your
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00:06:29,780 --> 00:06:32,100
insurance to pay for this massage?
99
00:06:32,360 --> 00:06:37,100
Uh -huh. You're going to have to let me,
who I'm praying, tell you what. You're
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00:06:37,100 --> 00:06:40,520
going to get the money from the
insurance company. Your insurance is
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cover all your therapy and all your
massages.
102
00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:48,200
Because that's what I do. I'm a
misogynist. I'm a professional massage
103
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I'm pretty sure you did not use that
word correctly. I did, because it's on
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certificate on my wall.
105
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What school did you go to?
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St. Paul's. St. Paul's? Yes.
107
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That's your invisible certificate?
108
00:07:03,430 --> 00:07:06,470
It's in the other room. Don't get smart
with me. You know what? I don't have
109
00:07:06,470 --> 00:07:11,970
time for this. I have a plethora of
clients that have traveled many miles to
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come for these magic hands.
111
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Okay? So you're on your own. Good luck
with the insurance, buddy. Wait. Wait.
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Come back.
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My dad says I talk way too fucking much,
and I think I just did.
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What can I do for you so you don't say
anything?
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I don't know.
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I don't know.
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I think we're at an impasse here.
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What can I do for you so that you get
paid and I get massages?
119
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You can start off with being less bitchy
and just let me do my job.
120
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Well, you might want to ask the girl
before you spread her cheeks and offer a
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center massage. That's not standard.
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I still didn't offer you a sphincter
massage.
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No, you did.
124
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Just like you said that you were a
massage therapist instead of a massage
125
00:08:01,410 --> 00:08:02,910
therapist, I think you're a little
confused.
126
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I'm not confused. I've had plenty of
coffee this morning. I am sharp as a
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That's why you're staring down at one
spot and not looking at me at all while
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you're talking.
129
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All right, listen, you know what? I'm
trying to do my job here, okay? I'm a...
130
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Trained misogynist, okay?
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This is what I do.
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And you're not letting me do, and so
you're just going to have to, you know
133
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what? Good luck with your insurance
claim, you know? It's actually fraud.
134
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And your dad's going to have to handle
not only an insurance claim, but a fraud
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00:08:31,620 --> 00:08:34,919
case because you're going to be in jail.
And I'm done with this. Wait, wait,
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wait.
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What?
138
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What can I do?
139
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So this goes away and we're both happy.
140
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Okay, you can start by not being such a
prude. I've seen this before.
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Secondly, you know what?
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I've just had it with your mouth. Your
dad is right. So you're just going to
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have to grin and bear it.
144
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So I can do this massage and file the
paperwork and be done with it. Land your
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belly.
146
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Okay.
147
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Can I have the towel back, please?
148
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Thank you.
149
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Close your eyes.
150
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You know,
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I could go to jail by helping you assist
in this insurance fraud. You know, I'm
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certified here by the state. I have to,
like, file a claim every quarter for
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anybody that comes in and says that
they're doing, you know, illegal stuff
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they're doing stuff that, you know,
insurance is paying for, but they're not
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really hurt.
156
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Illegal stuff?
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Yeah, people suck. That's the man
grabbing my pit.
158
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What are you talking about?
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You know what? You're a criminal.
160
00:09:50,490 --> 00:09:52,070
You get to grab criminal's tits.
161
00:09:53,890 --> 00:09:56,470
I'm pretty sure that's not how things
work. That's how things work.
162
00:09:56,970 --> 00:09:59,350
You know what? That's how it works.
That's how it works in jail.
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Jail?
164
00:10:02,230 --> 00:10:03,790
Who's talking about jail?
165
00:10:04,170 --> 00:10:08,110
Alright, you know what? Go call your
dad. Let him file all your insurance
166
00:10:08,630 --> 00:10:10,430
What the hell are you talking about?
167
00:10:10,960 --> 00:10:15,600
You're committing a crime and you're
making me a part of it. I can't be a
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00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:16,239
of that.
169
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I own this place. I have people that
rely on me to give them work.
170
00:10:21,620 --> 00:10:23,620
You're asking me to do something
illegal.
171
00:10:24,500 --> 00:10:27,180
It's a lose -lose situation for me.
172
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What can I do to make it a win -win?
173
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I... I have a big fucking mouth.
174
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What can I do?
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To make this go away, and so that you
actually do get money, and I get my...
176
00:10:45,370 --> 00:10:48,770
What the fuck are you doing? I'm
listening carefully to your offer.
177
00:10:49,370 --> 00:10:51,590
Why are you listening to the back of my
head? That's a little weird.
178
00:10:52,110 --> 00:10:54,810
I'm waiting for you to turn around and
address my face.
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I would, until you put your head back of
mine.
180
00:10:59,830 --> 00:11:04,230
Okay. I think we're done here. No, no,
no, no, no, no, no. No, no, I'm sorry.
181
00:11:04,370 --> 00:11:05,970
Listen, I...
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00:11:06,640 --> 00:11:10,320
I respect this establishment and that's
why I'm here. Let's just start from
183
00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:13,500
zero. Let's just lay you on your belly.
We'll just start fresh.
184
00:11:13,740 --> 00:11:14,740
Okay?
185
00:11:15,160 --> 00:11:16,160
Sure.
186
00:11:16,460 --> 00:11:17,460
Okay.
187
00:11:19,360 --> 00:11:20,360
That's good.
188
00:11:21,560 --> 00:11:22,580
Perfect plan.
189
00:11:23,460 --> 00:11:26,440
Okay, so just lay down?
190
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Lay down on your belly.
191
00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:29,600
No.
192
00:11:30,020 --> 00:11:33,520
No. You said you wanted to fix it. This
is how we fix it. Lay on your belly.
193
00:11:33,640 --> 00:11:35,880
Okay. Forget about the blanket.
194
00:11:36,740 --> 00:11:37,740
Towel. Just lay down.
195
00:11:38,320 --> 00:11:40,200
Okay. There we go.
196
00:11:40,820 --> 00:11:42,340
You know, you said you had a big mouth.
197
00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:44,140
You said your dad said you have a big
mouth.
198
00:11:44,740 --> 00:11:47,500
I got a way of fixing a big mouth for
you.
199
00:11:47,840 --> 00:11:51,380
Whoa, excuse me. What the fuck are you
doing?
200
00:11:51,740 --> 00:11:56,240
Well, I'm going to put this in that big
mouth that got you into trouble.
201
00:11:56,520 --> 00:11:57,479
Oh, God.
202
00:11:57,480 --> 00:11:58,720
There you go.
203
00:11:59,600 --> 00:12:03,740
Just open up. This is how... Listen, I
can go file with the state, or you can
204
00:12:03,740 --> 00:12:04,740
just put this in your mouth.
205
00:12:04,960 --> 00:12:05,960
You promise?
206
00:12:05,980 --> 00:12:08,640
I promise to put it in your mouth.
207
00:12:09,280 --> 00:12:16,180
And you won't file? I won't file with
the state
208
00:12:16,180 --> 00:12:20,100
of... Okay,
209
00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:22,820
I'll just file. No, no, no.
210
00:12:23,900 --> 00:12:24,900
Okay,
211
00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:27,240
I'll just file. No, no, no, no.
212
00:12:27,840 --> 00:12:28,840
Come back.
213
00:12:33,680 --> 00:12:35,840
Okay, I'll just go. No, no, no. Okay.
214
00:12:38,700 --> 00:12:40,440
It's not that bad.
215
00:12:42,460 --> 00:12:43,460
There we go.
216
00:12:43,820 --> 00:12:45,320
There we go.
217
00:12:46,820 --> 00:12:47,820
Yes.
218
00:12:48,660 --> 00:12:50,000
Smells like hot oil, right?
219
00:12:51,160 --> 00:12:52,240
What the fuck?
220
00:12:52,560 --> 00:12:53,860
I used popcorn oil down there.
221
00:12:54,940 --> 00:12:55,940
Keeps my skin young.
222
00:12:56,220 --> 00:12:57,600
There we go. There we go.
223
00:12:58,260 --> 00:12:59,260
Yes. Good.
224
00:12:59,900 --> 00:13:01,720
Good. Work it. Work it.
225
00:13:02,200 --> 00:13:03,840
Can't just suck it. You've got to get
them excited.
226
00:13:04,700 --> 00:13:05,760
There we go.
227
00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:07,240
There we go.
228
00:13:07,880 --> 00:13:08,880
Yeah.
229
00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:10,280
Yeah.
230
00:13:13,240 --> 00:13:14,240
Yes,
231
00:13:15,560 --> 00:13:17,200
you're choking on it. Yes.
232
00:13:18,480 --> 00:13:20,680
Come a little closer.
233
00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:24,580
Come on. Come on. I'm going to bite you.
234
00:13:36,189 --> 00:13:39,250
I said fucking dick, not fucking face
fucking.
235
00:13:39,450 --> 00:13:40,389
What the fuck?
236
00:13:40,390 --> 00:13:41,770
No, I think I said face fucking.
237
00:13:43,550 --> 00:13:46,850
You are a strange fucking bird.
238
00:13:47,570 --> 00:13:48,570
Come here.
239
00:13:48,830 --> 00:13:51,770
Pretty sure your dick won't spit in my
nose.
240
00:13:54,850 --> 00:13:55,850
That's it.
241
00:13:58,050 --> 00:13:59,050
Oh, yes.
242
00:13:59,590 --> 00:14:01,730
Better relax that throat.
243
00:14:01,970 --> 00:14:04,230
You know, the one that you use to talk
on the phone when you're driving.
244
00:14:14,229 --> 00:14:15,229
See,
245
00:14:17,190 --> 00:14:18,190
crime doesn't pay.
246
00:14:19,550 --> 00:14:21,670
Come on.
247
00:14:23,430 --> 00:14:26,630
You gotta want it.
248
00:14:27,790 --> 00:14:28,930
You gotta want it.
249
00:14:31,010 --> 00:14:32,010
There you go.
250
00:14:34,410 --> 00:14:36,490
I feel like you like it. Come on.
251
00:14:38,630 --> 00:14:39,630
That's it.
252
00:14:46,160 --> 00:14:47,960
Oh, it's so fucking good.
253
00:14:48,840 --> 00:14:51,380
Roll on your back.
254
00:14:52,220 --> 00:14:53,960
I got an easier way to do this.
255
00:14:54,440 --> 00:14:55,840
Roll on your back. It's okay.
256
00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:57,200
It's okay.
257
00:14:57,820 --> 00:14:59,920
There we go.
258
00:15:00,620 --> 00:15:01,620
There we go.
259
00:15:11,470 --> 00:15:12,490
There we go.
260
00:15:14,310 --> 00:15:15,570
There we go.
261
00:15:17,570 --> 00:15:19,430
Now that's what we're doing.
262
00:15:21,390 --> 00:15:22,390
Yes.
263
00:15:26,010 --> 00:15:28,850
Who the fuck has their dick stuck like
this?
264
00:15:30,710 --> 00:15:32,450
Train misogynist.
265
00:15:33,230 --> 00:15:35,350
Oh my god. Oh my god.
266
00:15:38,030 --> 00:15:39,030
Yes.
267
00:15:41,910 --> 00:15:42,910
There you go, just suck on it.
268
00:15:43,190 --> 00:15:44,990
Suck on the tip. There you go. There you
go.
269
00:15:46,330 --> 00:15:47,330
Oh, yeah.
270
00:15:48,330 --> 00:15:49,570
Yeah. Oh,
271
00:15:51,490 --> 00:15:54,010
that's good. How long is it going to
take you to fucking cum?
272
00:15:54,770 --> 00:15:55,810
Oh, you want me to cum now?
273
00:15:56,690 --> 00:15:57,810
It's not in my face.
274
00:15:58,030 --> 00:16:00,010
It's not in your face? Just a little bit
more.
275
00:16:00,470 --> 00:16:02,070
Just a little bit more. There you go.
276
00:16:02,510 --> 00:16:03,870
There we go. There we go.
277
00:16:04,750 --> 00:16:05,750
Oh, mate.
278
00:16:06,590 --> 00:16:07,590
Come here.
279
00:16:13,550 --> 00:16:14,570
You said you wanted me to come.
280
00:16:14,850 --> 00:16:16,190
And I have to come now.
281
00:16:16,510 --> 00:16:18,670
I didn't say fuck me.
282
00:16:18,890 --> 00:16:19,890
No, I did.
283
00:16:19,970 --> 00:16:20,970
That's part of the deal.
284
00:16:21,710 --> 00:16:24,150
Yeah. Either that or I file with the
state.
285
00:16:25,190 --> 00:16:27,530
State, or am I dead considerate of your
pussy?
286
00:16:28,690 --> 00:16:30,590
State, dead considerate of your pussy.
287
00:16:30,890 --> 00:16:31,890
I am fucking.
288
00:16:32,290 --> 00:16:33,290
Alright, cool.
289
00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:17,920
Special circumstances, especially when
it comes to insurance fraud.
290
00:18:19,120 --> 00:18:21,820
They demand special places.
291
00:18:22,240 --> 00:18:23,780
They demand special places?
292
00:18:23,980 --> 00:18:24,980
Yes.
293
00:18:25,500 --> 00:18:29,040
You may not understand the word
misogyny, but you certainly do. I'm glad
294
00:18:29,040 --> 00:18:31,220
cleared up this situation, Jessica.
295
00:18:32,100 --> 00:18:34,200
And I'm sure you learned your lesson.
296
00:18:35,440 --> 00:18:41,700
So, I hope we can continue our little
insurance coup d 'etat.
297
00:18:48,440 --> 00:18:50,540
Yeah. I'll call you when I want a
booking appointment.
298
00:18:50,840 --> 00:18:51,840
Okay, great.
299
00:18:51,900 --> 00:18:56,180
So, you've got to get changed really
quick. Get out of here. My 10 -15 is
300
00:18:56,180 --> 00:18:57,180
coming.
20900
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