Original subtitles

Anything, however small, will set off the recordings.

Oh, God, are you two still trying to find times of paranormal activity in the

house? I thought you'd given up on that by now.

Anyone mind if I have the last of the Rice Krispies? No, don't do that!

Why? The noise they make when I set off the recordings.

Oh, God.

I've just spent the entire night and a sleeping bag on a concrete floor for

this. It was a complete waste of time.

Oh, I wouldn't say that.

Why? It's the best night's sleep I've had in ages. Never mind.

There's plenty of time. We didn't expect to find anything on the first go.

Did we?

No. Sometimes it takes years.

You didn't tell me that.

You didn't ask.

Breakfast ready.

I'm going upstairs.

I need at least another five hours more sleep.

But I've made all this stuff.

I'll have some.

It's not. until this equipment is cleared up.

Can't we leave it there? No.

Do it in a minute.

Hi, Rona.

What's all this?

We were filming what happens during the night.

Oh, that never comes out very well, does it?

I mean, um, oh, how interesting.

You got my message, then?

Yeah.

Tony said you thought we'd better meet up first thing.

The estate agent rang yesterday evening.

Unless we make a firm offer for the warehouse by the end of today, we'll

it. A property company are after it as well, but he's delaying them.

Oh, no.

So I thought we'd better run through the details together again and somehow try

to decide if it's what we want.

Rona? Mm?

I thought we'd better not put off the decision any longer.

Yeah.

After all, it's the right size at the fair price. It ought to be the one we

want.

What are you looking at?

Just the postman.

He's early today.

Oh, why don't we look at those plans we made ages ago about the kind of layout

inside we'll need?

Good idea.

What do we do with that?

Down in the cellar, isn't it? Somewhere. I won't be a minute.

Oh! Oh, sorry. Sorry, did I startle you? I was just over here visiting.

Shall I give these to you, then? Yes, I'll give them to Bill.

Were you going over to my place now?

Yes, I would be. Do you want them now?

There's one for you, I think, and some circulars. It's not mine I'm so worried

about. Is there anything for Mrs E. Harris?

She's waiting for a new rent book, I think. No, nothing today. Only this one

you from the council.

Oh, all right. If you could put the others through my door as usual.

Right, right. How is your mother? Oh, she's much the same.

We don't see much of her these days, do we?

That's because she... Can't get about like she could. Oh, well, comes to us

Bye. Bye. Give her my best. Oh, well.

Can't get about like she could. Well, that's true.

She's been dead for 11 years, Rona.

Well, there you are, then.

Why is she still getting letters?

She doesn't get many.

And why do you have to get hold of them before Tony sees them?

Because I haven't had time to do anything about it, and he might not

What?

The council thinks she's still alive.

I've been meaning to tell them, but my house is in her name.

Why don't you just tell them you've taken over the tenancy? I'm sure they

mind. After all, you've lived in that house since you were a girl.

I suppose you're right.

Where are you going?

I told Laura I'd go to the garden centre with her. You've only had a piece of

toast. That's all I want.

What is the point of me putting all this stuff out?

David will eat it. David would eat Malcolm Rifkin if I put him between two

slices of bread. That's not the point. You must eat properly. I am eating

properly. I'm just not hungry today.

And where's that plate you took upstairs?

I'll get it later.

No, get it now.

You didn't make David put all this stuff away.

I'm not talking about this stuff. I'm talking about the plate. It's just one

plate, not a room full of junk. Well, for God's sake, I'm being thrown out of

house and you're both going on about a plate.

What?

Here, eat for yourself.

must have told them.

They can't just tell you to get out like this.

They have.

My place is being sold off to raise money for new housing.

Don't worry, I'm sure you can appeal or something.

Read the bottom bit, they've had the appeal.

In that house since I was six.

What sort of vindictive lowlife would drop me into this?

Can I come in?

I think I'll go and get my plate.

Tony?

the house when a letter came to my mother yeah uh it was from the council

i just wrote deceased on the envelope and posted the whole thing back in the

we don't want to end up with a council tax demand for a dead person do we

do we

If that was a Toyota MR2, he'd never catch up with her.

Is that all you've got to say at a moment like this? Like what?

Rona's getting chucked out of her house.

Oh, no, that's terrible.

I know.

I was hoping we'd decide about the warehouse today.

They won't really make a move out, will they?

This looks pretty final to me.

It wouldn't be the same without her.

Oh, not so much better now.

Slept for hours, went out like a light.

Lots of results.

What's the tea?

Yet?

Ben, it's quarter to ten.

Already?

Doesn't it stay light for a long time at this time of the year?

It's like first thing in the morning.

It is first thing in the morning.

You mean I slept right through?

Oh, no, they've delivered yesterday's paper.

than ten minutes.

Oh, well, at least I won't have missed much then.

It's going to pour down in a minute.

What's she doing at that place?

Well, she's probably had to wait. You know, it's like down the council

I just can't believe I did something so stupid with that letter to her mother.

I would have done the same thing.

So would I. You see, everyone agreed.

It was a perfectly reasonable assumption.

Lord knows why he didn't open that letter to Enoch.

I'd have done like a shot, wouldn't you?

Honestly. Yes, I would. So would I. Oh, typical of men.

They have no sense of healthy curiosity.

I'm sure if his wife hadn't made him, Columbus would never have gone looking

America.

He just stayed at home and done some grouting.

I bet they're sitting in that room now without a care in the world.

Oh, I don't know.

I just don't know what we're going to do.

We let my place go six months ago. All my stuff is here.

Might never happen.

Yeah, sorry.

I just can't seem to get it out of my mind, whatever I do.

I know, I know.

I'm ashamed.

What about that penalty last night, 30 seconds to go, do you see? Oh, what? He

must have been blind to do that.

He floats from a train at Redstone and goes down mental hospitals.

What are they talking about?

Football. I knew it. Come a crisis, all they know how to do is to waste time

with a lot of nonsensical chit -chat.

At times like this, you need concentration.

My God, that jar is hideous.

Xenas, you know.

We all lived in terror of inheriting it in her will.

Oh, I don't know. It's probably quite rare now.

What was he like, Rona's mother?

Ena? A large woman.

And she also always swore she never ate anything.

You'd never think we were sisters.

I've only got to pop a peanut in my mouth and I burn off more calories than

will be nuclear power station.

There you are.

A delegation?

Well, what happened?

Don't worry.

Eventually I got to see the right person before the office closed for the

weekend and I explained the whole thing.

And? It's all right.

Because I'm the daughter of the previous tenant, I get precedence.

Well done.

All I've got to do is go in first thing Monday morning with my birth certificate

and they'll transfer the tenancy there and then.

Oh, thank God.

This calls for a drop of vicar's ruin.

I'm sorry about your plate. I panicked. Oh, it's all right. It was only an old

one. You don't have any old ones. I do now.

It's ready!

Thanks for coming over, Auntie.

I may have needed you.

It's a pleasure.

Not that one. It's mine.

All right.

Take those to your dad and Tony. What about David? Oh, he will want one.

I did do seven.

Oh, maybe Tony will drink another. Will he, Rona?

Rona?

Not here.

What isn't?

My birth certificate. It should be here amongst the guarantees and spare

batteries. Oh, no.

That's my TV light that I'm thinking of.

My birth certificate is... Here.

In the old tea tin.

No, I filled that up again with tea. My birth certificate is... In the sewing

box? No.

Beside the tea tray? No.

Road walk by the drifters.

We are trying to help Rona remember where her birth certificate is. Don't

me.

In the... Navy, by the British people.

Now look what you've started.

No, I remember, I remember. Mum always used to keep important documents.

Yes?

Somewhere. Yes, but where?

of the shelf just now.

I can't remember.

Was it?

Look out!

It's all right. Now I'm done.

Just got to put a bit too close to the end of the shelf.

I think you're right, Bill.

It's usually in the middle, isn't it?

Well, you must have moved it.

I haven't touched it for years. It was Mother's.

Oh, now it's started.

The old cookie jar.

It was one of her...

No, nothing.

Well, it must be somewhere.

Yes, but where?

Well, there's plenty of us. I'm sure if we all look, we'll find it in no time.

How's it going?

How are you getting on?

Nothing. Find anything upstairs?

Yeah, lots of things, but nothing I could show the council.

Do they really have to see your birth certificate? Why don't they just trust

you? I kept my mother's death from them for 11 years. You can't blame them for

insisting on the rules.

Can't we get a copy of it from Sunnister House or wherever it is these days? I

rang them. There's a backlog of seven weeks.

Never stop, Miss Marple.

Definitely not in any of the kitchen cupboards or drawers.

I'm going to do.

I have to have it by Monday morning.

We'll think of something.

For what?

Just look at this place.

We couldn't have turned it over more thoroughly if we hid a bottle of gin and

let in Princess Margaret.

Well, we'll just have to look everywhere all over again.

But it's almost 11 o 'clock.

Let's face it, I'm out of my year.

Are you sure we've looked everywhere your mum might have put something?

I don't know. I can't remember.

Lots of these old things were hers. Lots of them are thrown away. Oh, no, what

have I thrown it away?

Do you think she might possibly have kept it in an old mangle?

No, I certainly don't think so.

What's that?

Are you all right? What happened?

That tin fell off the wall unit.

You should be more careful, Auntie.

I didn't touch it.

Coronation biscuit tin.

I'd forgotten all about it. It was another of Mum's places. Where did you

was? Out there?

Oh, please, let it be in here. I'll never put it in again.

An old ten -shilling note.

How did it fall off of there without anyone touching it?

Unless... What?

Telephonic phenomena.

It's possible.

Oh, no, don't start all that again. You said it yourself.

The cookie jar was on a different place in the shelf before. Now this has fallen

off without anyone touching it.

Obviously, Rona's mother is somehow still here.

It's obvious.

She's trying to tell us what the birth certificate is.

Will

someone

help me with this motion sensor on the stairs?

I'll have a go.

Are you sure you want to go on with this ridiculous raga?

We haven't really got much choice, have we, auntie?

Where's the salad plate?

I'll bring it.

Oh, dear, oh, dear.

Ben? Oh, you set off the relay. Now I'm going to have to reset it all again.

Just disconnect it for a minute.

What?

Ben, I don't want the kids to be here for this seance.

Why not?

You know, me and David did exactly the same thing last night. Oh, that was

different. How?

That was a waste of time.

Ah. So you do think there's something in this?

No.

Well, I don't know. There might be. And if there is, it could be dangerous.

Very dangerous.

You've been watching my video of The Devil Rides Out again, haven't you?

No.

Haven't you?

Yes.

I told you last time, it's just a midget in a goat suit. It's not the real

devil. I know, I'm not stupid.

They had very low budgets in them days.

Didn't you notice that the terrifying angel of death was just a plastic

on a horse?

A real horse?

It was just a story based on sensationalism and ignorance.

This is a serious scientific examination.

Where did you get all this stuff?

Tandy.

I'm just worried that something might happen.

Look, if there is anything in all this, rationally, it's very likely it's just

caused by some aspect of the human mind, right?

I suppose so.

So if we do this and Rona starts thinking about her mother, the most that

happen is she might remember where she put the birth certificate.

I suppose so. All right, then.

If Satan materialises, it's just a bonus.

Ready?

As ready as I'll ever be.

Will you please get this over with?

You're asking me? It's a complete waste of time.

Aren't you going to switch the lights off?

You don't really have to switch the lights off. I thought you usually did.

No, she moved the cookie jar in the tin with the lights on.

Yeah, but they were the wrong things. Perhaps you can find things better in

dark. Why?

I don't know. I'm not a ghost.

I don't mind having the lights off if it helps.

We won't be able to see anything if it happens then.

We could use that candle.

Alright then. Alright.

We wait.

What for?

For Rona's mum to show if she's present.

How will we know? It will switch on all the machines.

You did remember... Yes, I remembered to plug it in.

Do we say is there anybody there or something?

That's what they do in film.

We can't just sit here waiting. We ought to do something.

You can play it if you want.

Right.

All right.

Is there... I can't.

Why? Well, it's silly. It's what they say in film.

Well, what would you rather say?

Can you hear me, Mother?

That was Sandy Fowle's catchphrase in the war. You can't say that.

You might get him instead.

I don't want a dead comedian in the kitchen.

He didn't make me laugh, even when he was alive.

Well, what should I say, then?

Well, how about something like, Hello, Mum, are you there?

That's good.

Right, then.

Hello, Mum, are you there?

I'm sorry to bother you.

I know you deserve your rest right now, but we need your help to

find something.

I've gone and got myself into a bit of a mess again. I know, I know, I promised

I'd take care, but you know me, rushing off questions later.

I should have trusted Tony enough to tell him what I'd done, but...

I was scared of what he'd say.

I suppose I should have told the council that you'd died straight away, but... I

suppose I was frightened to be on my own to start with.

Without you for the first time.

I know we were never very close.

Not like other mothers and daughters.

Even though you were distant, you were always there.

I know Auntie Pearl does her best, but...

Sometimes I just really need my mother.

For a moment.

You there?

Sorry about that. I couldn't wait.

Did I miss anything at all? Oh, auntie!

For a moment then I... Never mind.

Now let's try again.

No!

It's a waste of time. Aunty Pearl knows it is.

No, I'm sure she doesn't think that, do you?

Well, I... Let's just try one more time.

Well, what should I say this time?

Well, just talk to her like you were doing before, as if she was here with

She obviously isn't, is she? That's the whole point. We don't know that.

Yes, we do. If she was really here in the room with us, she'd give us some

of sign.

He obviously wants it out. No, Ben, that's rubbish. It was just a storm.

Well, you wanted to carry on. Only because Rona might remember something.

is just a coincidence, like the...

You're in a right mess now, aren't you?

What's that?

It's got to switch to play somehow when I reset it.

This can't go on any longer.

Humpty, is that your voice?

Sure, later. She's bound to find out.

And then where will you be?

When did it record that?

Must be when you triggered off the relay earlier.

You'll be up barking creep without a dog, that's where.

Humpty? And what are you going to do if someone saw you move?

the cookie jar, Pearl.

You moved the cookie jar?

Yes.

Why?

The same reason I moved the biscuit tin.

You moved the biscuit tin?

Yeah, when it fell down earlier. I was looking inside.

I don't understand. Why did you move them and not tell us?

I was looking for this.

I didn't want you to find it.

moment then I really thought my mother was here.

She is.

I'm your mother.

It was 1957.

I wasn't married. It was still quite a disgrace in those days.

Ina and your father couldn't have children so We thought it was best all

if you thought they were your parents.

Looking back, we were as wrong as wrong could be.

Look what a wonderful daughter you've turned out to be for me.

Can you forgive me?

It's stopped raining.

The stars have come out.

How are they?

Well, it was a terrible shock.

Rona was really angry at first. Then there were floods of tears.

I went back in a moment ago and they were arguing about whether Flash was as

good as it used to be before they sold it in assorted colours.

So I think things are getting back to normal.

What about Dad?

Oh, so much better now. Went out like a light, slippery hour. Lottery results

been on yet?

Why are we in Rona's?

Still, at least we've got the birth certificate.

Oh, no.

What?

This is no good at all.

What do you mean? Of course it is.

What this shows is that Rona is Pearl's daughter, not Enid's.

So she won't get the tenancy automatically signed over to her at all.

Oh, my God.

What's going to happen to the house?

Yeah, yeah, don't worry.

I think that's the last of it all.

You know, I never really believed they'd actually sell it.

Well, they did.

Come on, we'll be here all day.

Where are all my washing up things?

Thanks for lending me the deposit money.

I promise I'll pay you back everything.

You'd better. We need it to rent the warehouse if we're ever going to get the

business going again.

I think it's a bit much for a picnic, all this.

Oh, I don't know.

Sometimes in this life, I think you never know what's going to happen.

All clear now.

At last we can relax.

The house is all mine forever.