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1
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That was a lovely meal, Sid.
2
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It was fabulous, Daddy.
3
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Yep, I couldn't eat another thing, Dad.
I'm not surprised.
4
00:00:50,700 --> 00:00:53,879
You've been going at it like a genic.
Well, when you're young, you need to eat
5
00:00:53,880 --> 00:00:57,119
lot of food. I burn up a lot of energy.
Oh, I'll grant you that. Must take a lot
6
00:00:57,120 --> 00:00:58,399
out of you, combing your hair.
7
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You're just jealous, Daddy, because
you're going bald.
8
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I am not going bald. All right,
receding.
9
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It's not receding. I've just got a very
high forehead, that's all.
10
00:01:07,360 --> 00:01:08,920
Well, it gets higher every year.
11
00:01:09,200 --> 00:01:10,460
That's enough, children.
12
00:01:11,460 --> 00:01:12,960
Take no notice, my darling.
13
00:01:13,340 --> 00:01:15,200
I think you're still very attractive.
14
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So do I.
15
00:01:21,060 --> 00:01:22,110
That's it.
16
00:01:24,020 --> 00:01:25,070
What is that?
17
00:01:25,240 --> 00:01:26,290
It's a doggy bag.
18
00:01:26,440 --> 00:01:27,820
We haven't got a doggy.
19
00:01:28,180 --> 00:01:29,940
It's not a doggy bag, it's for Daddy.
20
00:01:30,140 --> 00:01:32,600
Who eats like a garrot?
21
00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:35,390
Are you ready, Mr. Abbott? Not yet, I'll
let you know.
22
00:01:36,280 --> 00:01:37,480
What was all that about?
23
00:01:37,481 --> 00:01:39,779
Nothing. What have you got to let the
pianist know?
24
00:01:39,780 --> 00:01:42,730
Nothing. You're not going to sing, are
you, Dad? No, I'm not.
25
00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:45,870
Very strange going on. What have you
done?
26
00:01:45,871 --> 00:01:47,319
What do you mean, what have I done?
27
00:01:47,320 --> 00:01:49,799
You must have done something. This lot's
going to cost a bomb.
28
00:01:49,800 --> 00:01:52,079
Yeah, he's obviously feeling very guilty
about something.
29
00:01:52,080 --> 00:01:55,140
You must admit, Sid, you don't usually
splash out like this.
30
00:01:55,540 --> 00:01:58,910
I've brought you out tonight to
celebrate a very special occasion.
31
00:01:58,980 --> 00:02:00,060
You've been promoted.
32
00:02:00,380 --> 00:02:01,780
No. You've been slapped.
33
00:02:02,060 --> 00:02:03,110
No.
34
00:02:03,200 --> 00:02:05,120
Come on, Daddy.
35
00:02:05,960 --> 00:02:07,580
All right, I did it. What is today?
36
00:02:07,940 --> 00:02:10,290
Tuesday. Yeah, but it's a very special
Tuesday.
37
00:02:10,320 --> 00:02:12,320
It's not Pancake Tuesday, is it? No.
38
00:02:12,830 --> 00:02:16,650
Twenty -five years ago today, your
mother and I met for the very first
39
00:02:17,250 --> 00:02:18,300
Oh, Sid.
40
00:02:19,050 --> 00:02:20,550
The first you're remembering.
41
00:02:20,850 --> 00:02:24,700
Well, how could I forget? It was just
after the war, wasn't it? War or Crimea?
42
00:02:25,730 --> 00:02:27,150
You've been romantic.
43
00:02:27,370 --> 00:02:28,420
I'm sorry.
44
00:02:28,630 --> 00:02:31,450
I think that's a lovely thought and a
lovely surprise.
45
00:02:32,070 --> 00:02:33,750
I've got another surprise for you.
46
00:02:34,010 --> 00:02:35,060
Oi, oi.
47
00:02:35,290 --> 00:02:36,530
Right, now... Yes, Doctor?
48
00:02:36,970 --> 00:02:38,020
Now, hold...
49
00:02:42,700 --> 00:02:45,660
very special request for Sid and June.
50
00:02:46,680 --> 00:02:47,730
Gene.
51
00:02:47,920 --> 00:02:52,599
Believe me, I can't read my own writing.
Sid and Gene, hoping it will bring them
52
00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:54,520
both happy memories.
53
00:02:54,960 --> 00:02:56,640
I'll have to get my pound back up in.
54
00:02:58,980 --> 00:03:01,320
Don't know where, don't know when.
55
00:03:01,321 --> 00:03:02,239
Come on.
56
00:03:02,240 --> 00:03:03,780
Come on where? On the floor.
57
00:03:04,140 --> 00:03:05,190
You mean to talk?
58
00:03:05,340 --> 00:03:09,720
Oh, don't you abolish it. Come on. Oh,
no. Come on.
59
00:03:28,900 --> 00:03:30,580
There you are. There you are, matey.
60
00:03:31,820 --> 00:03:33,930
There you are. See, we're playing our
song.
61
00:03:33,931 --> 00:03:37,479
Do you remember what we danced to that
at the Hammersmith Palais?
62
00:03:37,480 --> 00:03:39,650
I've never been to the Hammersmith
Palais.
63
00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:42,980
And our song was the White Cliffs of
Dover.
64
00:03:43,280 --> 00:03:44,330
Was it?
65
00:03:44,331 --> 00:03:48,119
I think we'll go now before the
bloodshed starts.
66
00:03:48,120 --> 00:03:50,759
That's all right. I remember the song.
It was just a liberati. They'd never
67
00:03:50,760 --> 00:03:51,419
heard of it.
68
00:03:51,420 --> 00:03:53,319
Hey, listen there. How did you two get
together?
69
00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:55,730
Yes, was it love at first sight? No, not
exactly.
70
00:03:55,740 --> 00:03:59,560
It was more like hate at first sight.
Well, come on. Tell us about it. Well,
71
00:03:59,580 --> 00:04:04,300
when I first met your father, I thought
he was pushing, overbearing, conceited.
72
00:04:04,301 --> 00:04:07,779
Isn't he fantastic, Sal? All these years
and he's never changed.
73
00:04:07,780 --> 00:04:11,180
I can't believe it. 25 years ago, I was
a very good -looking fella.
74
00:04:11,400 --> 00:04:13,020
You see, Mike, daddy has changed.
75
00:04:13,260 --> 00:04:14,980
It's no risk that you can't win.
76
00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:17,610
Well, go on.
77
00:04:18,019 --> 00:04:21,899
Well, it was just after the war and I
was a wren. A what?
78
00:04:22,300 --> 00:04:23,500
A lady sailor.
79
00:04:24,980 --> 00:04:27,270
Corporals' bed warmers, we used to call
them.
80
00:04:27,980 --> 00:04:29,320
I was a corporal.
81
00:04:30,380 --> 00:04:34,419
Anyway, I was on my way home after being
demobbed. Wait a minute. And I was on
82
00:04:34,420 --> 00:04:36,040
my way home after being demobbed.
83
00:04:39,080 --> 00:04:40,130
Bless them all.
84
00:04:40,460 --> 00:04:41,510
Bless them all.
85
00:04:41,980 --> 00:04:45,180
Come on, all ticketed in.
86
00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:49,559
We've all got our ticket. The sergeant
can stick it such here at my leg. Bless
87
00:04:49,560 --> 00:04:50,610
them all.
88
00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:55,560
Here, I've just been... How do you do?
89
00:04:57,400 --> 00:04:58,450
How do you do?
90
00:04:58,640 --> 00:04:59,690
How do you do?
91
00:05:00,280 --> 00:05:01,480
I've just been demobbed.
92
00:05:01,481 --> 00:05:03,079
Congratulations. Thank you.
93
00:05:03,080 --> 00:05:05,550
Want a swallow, Jack? No, thank you. Sit
yourself.
94
00:05:08,180 --> 00:05:09,800
Hold that a minute.
95
00:05:10,380 --> 00:05:11,430
Right,
96
00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:17,850
we did it, didn't we?
97
00:05:18,120 --> 00:05:19,170
I beg your pardon?
98
00:05:19,600 --> 00:05:22,180
That's three between us. We won the war,
didn't we?
99
00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:25,590
We wiped the floor with our lad off,
didn't we?
100
00:05:25,760 --> 00:05:30,619
Well, there were one or two other people
involved, I believe. Yes, we gave them
101
00:05:30,620 --> 00:05:32,540
a right full belt, didn't we, eh, Jack?
102
00:05:32,560 --> 00:05:36,520
Yes, didn't we? Yeah, Fritz won't try it
again in a hurry, will he? Eh, Wings?
103
00:05:37,300 --> 00:05:40,160
No. If he does, mate, I'm not flaming
going.
104
00:05:40,560 --> 00:05:41,610
Very good.
105
00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:45,310
Well, just a minute, mate. I didn't get
these for nothing, you know.
106
00:05:45,740 --> 00:05:47,400
And what do you think this is?
107
00:05:48,020 --> 00:05:49,070
Scrambled egg?
108
00:05:49,071 --> 00:05:52,719
They offered me a commission, you know.
109
00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:53,770
Really? Yeah.
110
00:05:53,771 --> 00:05:57,029
I told them I didn't want to turn it
down. I said, I want to be the lads, I
111
00:05:57,030 --> 00:06:00,280
said. I don't want to fight the war from
behind a desk in Whitehall.
112
00:06:01,290 --> 00:06:02,910
Which desk were you behind then?
113
00:06:03,230 --> 00:06:06,070
I was with Fighter Command at Biggin
Hill.
114
00:06:07,670 --> 00:06:08,720
You?
115
00:06:08,850 --> 00:06:09,900
Russian convoys.
116
00:06:10,750 --> 00:06:12,860
Yeah, well, we all did have it, didn't
we?
117
00:06:14,450 --> 00:06:15,500
Biggin Hill, eh?
118
00:06:15,510 --> 00:06:16,560
That's right.
119
00:06:16,630 --> 00:06:18,860
Wasn't all being a brokering there, was
it?
120
00:06:19,070 --> 00:06:20,120
Hardly.
121
00:06:20,310 --> 00:06:21,750
You did a good job there, mush.
122
00:06:22,030 --> 00:06:24,010
How sweet of him to say so. Not at all.
123
00:06:24,670 --> 00:06:25,930
What was it Winston said?
124
00:06:26,350 --> 00:06:29,110
Never have so many had so little. No.
125
00:06:30,490 --> 00:06:32,690
Never have so few been out.
126
00:06:33,150 --> 00:06:34,200
No.
127
00:06:34,630 --> 00:06:38,489
Now, don't tell me. I'll get it. Never
have so few had so much of it sweating
128
00:06:38,490 --> 00:06:39,570
the beaches. That's it.
129
00:06:41,590 --> 00:06:43,150
He's somebody, that, isn't he?
130
00:06:45,710 --> 00:06:47,110
Russian convoy, is that?
131
00:06:47,450 --> 00:06:49,390
Yes. Big ships, was it?
132
00:06:50,350 --> 00:06:52,620
Frigate. That's nice language, isn't it?
133
00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:58,820
I commanded a frigate. Oh, good. Well
done, Jack.
134
00:06:59,040 --> 00:07:01,380
All together then for Jack. A rule.
135
00:07:02,160 --> 00:07:05,420
Britannia. Britannia. Would you mind
shutting up?
136
00:07:05,700 --> 00:07:07,140
I'm not trying to be cheerful.
137
00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:08,740
And we did win, didn't we?
138
00:07:08,741 --> 00:07:12,679
Eh? I'm entitled to a little bit of
happiness after five years of suffering,
139
00:07:12,680 --> 00:07:13,079
aren't I?
140
00:07:13,080 --> 00:07:17,019
Just as a matter of interest, where were
you during the conflict? On the home
141
00:07:17,020 --> 00:07:18,070
front, I assume.
142
00:07:18,071 --> 00:07:19,839
That's just where you're wrong, matey.
143
00:07:19,840 --> 00:07:21,340
Three solid years abroad I was.
144
00:07:21,341 --> 00:07:23,779
Oh, Tommy, she's rocking about a bit,
isn't she?
145
00:07:23,780 --> 00:07:25,020
Three solid years, mate.
146
00:07:25,340 --> 00:07:29,219
I didn't have it cushy here in Brightly.
Oh, no, not swigging gin and knocking
147
00:07:29,220 --> 00:07:30,379
back rum in the wardrobe.
148
00:07:30,380 --> 00:07:34,339
Oh, no, when you come down to it, mate,
it's the ordinary British Tommy wins the
149
00:07:34,340 --> 00:07:35,390
war.
150
00:07:35,660 --> 00:07:38,190
PBI, mate, the Poor Bleeding Infantry,
that's it.
151
00:07:38,191 --> 00:07:42,439
And that's where I was, right down there
in the front line, where the action
152
00:07:42,440 --> 00:07:44,240
was. And where were you, Montgomery?
153
00:07:44,880 --> 00:07:46,520
Western Desert or Normandy?
154
00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:48,850
Isle of Man.
155
00:07:48,851 --> 00:07:54,289
I thought you said you were where the
action was. Believe me, matey, on a
156
00:07:54,290 --> 00:07:57,360
Saturday night over there, the action
was there all the time.
157
00:07:58,230 --> 00:08:01,370
So you didn't actually go overseas then?
158
00:08:01,650 --> 00:08:03,330
At this will, you're wrong, matey.
159
00:08:03,410 --> 00:08:04,650
I was one of the first.
160
00:08:05,050 --> 00:08:06,230
1939, it was.
161
00:08:06,810 --> 00:08:09,250
Never forget it. Just outside Leon, it
was.
162
00:08:10,570 --> 00:08:12,130
Murdered those first few weeks.
163
00:08:12,490 --> 00:08:13,970
Never seen so much blood.
164
00:08:14,250 --> 00:08:16,230
We weren't fighting the Germans at Leon.
165
00:08:16,630 --> 00:08:18,310
I'm not talking about the Germans.
166
00:08:18,470 --> 00:08:19,970
We were fighting the froggies.
167
00:08:20,830 --> 00:08:22,710
The froggies were on our side.
168
00:08:23,050 --> 00:08:24,270
Not where we were, matey.
169
00:08:25,170 --> 00:08:28,720
Murder's going on there. They didn't
like us missing the bat with their
170
00:08:28,730 --> 00:08:30,070
Oh, those birds.
171
00:08:30,071 --> 00:08:31,249
Oh, jolly.
172
00:08:31,250 --> 00:08:33,070
Oh, go blimey how jolly they were.
173
00:08:33,630 --> 00:08:35,980
They'd do anything for a packet of duty
freeze.
174
00:08:38,169 --> 00:08:40,149
I'll bet you got your share, didn't you?
175
00:08:40,710 --> 00:08:43,530
Did you actually ever see a German?
176
00:08:43,750 --> 00:08:45,630
Of course I actually saw a German.
177
00:08:45,830 --> 00:08:47,030
Here, hold that a minute.
178
00:08:48,510 --> 00:08:49,950
Where do you think I got that?
179
00:08:49,951 --> 00:08:51,199
Good Lord.
180
00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:52,539
Was that the Victoria Cross?
181
00:08:52,540 --> 00:08:53,860
No, the Iron Cross.
182
00:08:53,861 --> 00:08:55,759
Where the hell did you get that?
183
00:08:55,760 --> 00:08:56,840
From a German general.
184
00:08:57,040 --> 00:09:00,050
You were on our side, weren't you? Of
course I was on our side.
185
00:09:01,380 --> 00:09:03,160
I captured his whole section.
186
00:09:03,161 --> 00:09:04,459
You did?
187
00:09:04,460 --> 00:09:06,690
Yeah, with a couple of hundred other
fellas.
188
00:09:06,800 --> 00:09:10,399
And as a mark of respect, he gave me his
Iron Cross, his tin hat and his
189
00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:14,280
binoculars. That was extremely generous
of him. Yeah, well, it was a fair swap.
190
00:09:14,580 --> 00:09:16,320
And what did you give him in return?
191
00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:19,810
Half a bottle of chocolate and a piece
of salt.
192
00:09:23,420 --> 00:09:24,480
Where are we?
193
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:26,480
Where do you want to get off?
194
00:09:26,820 --> 00:09:28,940
Uxbridge. That's where we are.
195
00:09:29,240 --> 00:09:30,380
Oh, that's it. That's me.
196
00:09:31,080 --> 00:09:36,299
Maybe we'll meet again sometime, eh?
When Greg's drummer's here once more,
197
00:09:36,300 --> 00:09:37,440
together then. Goodbye.
198
00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:38,570
Bless them all.
199
00:09:38,760 --> 00:09:39,980
Bless them all.
200
00:09:43,820 --> 00:09:44,870
I say.
201
00:09:44,941 --> 00:09:52,229
According to the sign out there, the
station's called Little Puddington.
202
00:09:52,230 --> 00:09:55,660
Really? Well, you just tell that
soldier, Chappie, it was Uxbridge.
203
00:09:55,870 --> 00:09:59,310
I'd have told him it was Berlin if it
had got rid of him.
204
00:10:07,170 --> 00:10:08,220
Oh, Admiral.
205
00:10:08,450 --> 00:10:09,500
Yes, sir?
206
00:10:09,890 --> 00:10:12,840
That sign out on the platform there says
Little Puddleton.
207
00:10:12,870 --> 00:10:14,790
That's right, and it's in all our seats.
208
00:10:14,791 --> 00:10:17,389
But he's got no right to be. This is
Uxbridge.
209
00:10:17,390 --> 00:10:18,670
Come, come, Tommy Atkins.
210
00:10:18,950 --> 00:10:21,780
There's no need for subterfuge now. The
conflict's over.
211
00:10:22,010 --> 00:10:24,600
Didn't anyone tell you? The Hun's been
vanquished.
212
00:10:24,690 --> 00:10:25,890
Is this Uxbridge?
213
00:10:26,170 --> 00:10:27,610
Well, it wasn't this morning.
214
00:10:29,050 --> 00:10:31,790
This shows how stupid I was to...
Pardon, sir?
215
00:10:31,791 --> 00:10:32,889
Never mind.
216
00:10:32,890 --> 00:10:36,909
Can I get a train from here to Uxbridge?
Oh, yes, indeed, sir. Little Puddington
217
00:10:36,910 --> 00:10:38,889
may be small, but we're fully
functional.
218
00:10:38,890 --> 00:10:41,269
Oh, good. What's the time? What time is
it, then?
219
00:10:41,270 --> 00:10:45,110
Er... 10 .35, sir. No, no, no. The
train, you fool.
220
00:10:45,430 --> 00:10:46,930
Beg your pardon, sir. 10 .15.
221
00:10:47,550 --> 00:10:48,910
Oh, God, I've missed it.
222
00:10:49,690 --> 00:10:53,090
No, no, you've plenty of time, sir. 10
.15 in the morning, sir.
223
00:10:54,830 --> 00:10:55,880
In the morning?
224
00:10:56,010 --> 00:10:58,310
Oh, God, what a shoddy night I'm going
to have.
225
00:10:59,370 --> 00:11:05,410
Excuse me. Yes, sir? Could you tell me
what is the next train to Uxbridge?
226
00:11:05,670 --> 00:11:06,750
10 .15, sir.
227
00:11:07,270 --> 00:11:08,320
Tomorrow.
228
00:11:09,500 --> 00:11:12,690
Yeah, looks like we'll have to keep down
here tonight, darling.
229
00:11:12,860 --> 00:11:13,910
Isn't there a hotel?
230
00:11:13,911 --> 00:11:14,759
Oh, yes.
231
00:11:14,760 --> 00:11:18,550
There's the Oak Lodge Guesthouse. Shall
I give them a ring for you? Thank you.
232
00:11:18,560 --> 00:11:20,910
I'll see if I can put me up as well.
Very good, sir.
233
00:11:22,380 --> 00:11:23,700
So you're in Uxbridge, eh?
234
00:11:24,460 --> 00:11:25,510
Yes, I live there.
235
00:11:26,300 --> 00:11:27,740
I'm going to Uxbridge as well.
236
00:11:28,060 --> 00:11:29,500
It's a small world, isn't it?
237
00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:30,960
It's getting smaller.
238
00:11:33,320 --> 00:11:35,180
Which part of Uxbridge do you live in?
239
00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:37,250
Uxbridge.
240
00:11:37,520 --> 00:11:38,600
You know where I live?
241
00:11:39,040 --> 00:11:40,090
Up a garage walk.
242
00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:42,700
I must be very pleasant for you.
243
00:11:43,460 --> 00:11:44,510
Shocking.
244
00:11:45,340 --> 00:11:49,520
Here. I did a job for a fellow in
Uxbridge. A fellow by the name of
245
00:11:50,440 --> 00:11:53,630
Oh, a shocking old miser he was. The
biggest old twit in Uxbridge.
246
00:11:53,720 --> 00:11:54,770
Really? Yeah.
247
00:11:54,771 --> 00:11:57,519
I don't know how I ever made him a
counsellor. You know him.
248
00:11:57,520 --> 00:11:58,570
He's my father.
249
00:12:00,600 --> 00:12:03,370
You've done some good work, that fellow.
I voted for him.
250
00:12:10,360 --> 00:12:11,740
Was it something I said?
251
00:12:13,140 --> 00:12:14,980
It was everything you said.
252
00:12:21,880 --> 00:12:23,440
You're losing your grip, matey.
253
00:12:23,640 --> 00:12:27,010
I've been out in the guest house, sir.
All they got is one double room.
254
00:12:27,011 --> 00:12:28,019
You sure?
255
00:12:28,020 --> 00:12:31,299
Definitely, sir. I'm afraid you're out
of luck. Shall I tell the officer? Sure,
256
00:12:31,300 --> 00:12:32,860
I'll tell her. Hang on, hang on.
257
00:12:42,670 --> 00:12:46,160
It's quite blooming like a first night
home and there's only one room.
258
00:12:47,770 --> 00:12:48,820
Double room, he said.
259
00:12:50,610 --> 00:12:53,200
Double room can accommodate two people,
can't it?
260
00:12:53,750 --> 00:12:55,190
No, she never agreed to that.
261
00:12:56,850 --> 00:12:58,390
She would if I didn't tell her.
262
00:13:03,730 --> 00:13:05,210
Go away!
263
00:13:06,590 --> 00:13:08,390
She doesn't know what she's missing.
264
00:13:17,011 --> 00:13:19,829
sits at the end of the corridor.
265
00:13:19,830 --> 00:13:20,910
Pull twice to flush.
266
00:13:21,230 --> 00:13:22,970
Thank you, Mrs... Grimshaw.
267
00:13:22,971 --> 00:13:25,849
Mr. Grimshaw will bring you a cup of tea
in the morning.
268
00:13:25,850 --> 00:13:27,900
That's very kind of you. Good night,
then.
269
00:13:27,950 --> 00:13:29,000
Good night.
270
00:13:29,030 --> 00:13:30,080
Come on, Arthur.
271
00:13:34,510 --> 00:13:35,950
Everything all right, then?
272
00:13:36,110 --> 00:13:39,120
Well, it's not exactly the Savoy, but
it'll do for one night.
273
00:13:39,310 --> 00:13:41,110
How's your room? Oh, I can't grumble.
274
00:13:42,790 --> 00:13:43,850
Is it like this one?
275
00:13:44,150 --> 00:13:45,200
It is this one.
276
00:13:45,201 --> 00:13:50,939
Pardon? There isn't another room I
thought we could share.
277
00:13:50,940 --> 00:13:52,640
I wouldn't share with you.
278
00:13:53,320 --> 00:13:55,910
Well, don't knock it till you've tried
it, darling.
279
00:13:56,220 --> 00:13:59,980
Mom to you, Corporal, and stand to
attention when you address an officer.
280
00:14:00,300 --> 00:14:03,370
Oh, God, here we go. Don't call me
Corporal. I've been demobbed.
281
00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:06,050
Demobbed or not, you can find yourself
another room.
282
00:14:06,140 --> 00:14:07,880
Well, Blum, it's only for one night.
283
00:14:08,140 --> 00:14:10,960
I don't care if it's only for one
minute.
284
00:14:10,961 --> 00:14:14,659
Well, you don't have to worry about what
the Grimshaw's think. I don't care what
285
00:14:14,660 --> 00:14:17,610
the Grim... Why shouldn't I worry what
the Grimshaw's think?
286
00:14:17,850 --> 00:14:19,170
I told them we were married.
287
00:14:53,520 --> 00:14:54,570
It's raining.
288
00:14:54,620 --> 00:14:56,980
For the last time, get out.
289
00:14:57,380 --> 00:15:01,219
You can't tell me how it's pouring out
there. I don't care if it's a monsoon.
290
00:15:01,220 --> 00:15:02,420
You're not staying here.
291
00:15:02,860 --> 00:15:05,460
Oh, so this is the land fit for heroes.
292
00:15:05,980 --> 00:15:07,680
How quickly we forget.
293
00:15:08,960 --> 00:15:14,780
Five years in the Malayan jungle, having
the Japs, tsetse fly, malaria, very,
294
00:15:14,860 --> 00:15:19,420
very, just so that you can lie safe and
snug in your little sheets.
295
00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:22,190
Which is more than I would be if you
were here.
296
00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:24,820
All right, then. I respect your wishes.
297
00:15:25,100 --> 00:15:26,360
I'll see you in Luxbridge.
298
00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:29,000
Oh! Oh!
299
00:15:30,160 --> 00:15:31,210
Oh!
300
00:15:33,120 --> 00:15:34,170
Oh!
301
00:15:34,460 --> 00:15:35,520
Are you all right?
302
00:15:35,940 --> 00:15:36,990
It's just my wound.
303
00:15:38,760 --> 00:15:42,440
It always plays up in the rain. I'll be
all right. Don't worry.
304
00:15:44,480 --> 00:15:46,180
Corporal? Yes, madam?
305
00:15:46,181 --> 00:15:50,539
I've been thinking... I was thinking it
is raining rather hard. I was chucking
306
00:15:50,540 --> 00:15:51,590
it down out there.
307
00:15:51,860 --> 00:15:53,360
And you are wounded.
308
00:15:53,600 --> 00:15:55,520
It's all right. I've got my painkillers.
309
00:15:57,940 --> 00:15:59,060
You can stay here.
310
00:15:59,340 --> 00:16:01,330
Great. Which side of the bed do you
want?
311
00:16:01,340 --> 00:16:06,760
I said that you could share the room,
but that doesn't include the bed.
312
00:16:07,280 --> 00:16:08,840
Well, where am I going to sleep?
313
00:16:09,140 --> 00:16:11,000
There's a perfectly good chair there.
314
00:16:12,140 --> 00:16:14,180
We could put the pillow between us.
315
00:16:15,220 --> 00:16:18,850
I wouldn't share the... this bed with
you if we had a brick wall between us.
316
00:16:19,950 --> 00:16:21,000
Oh, all right.
317
00:16:22,430 --> 00:16:23,480
What are you doing?
318
00:16:23,830 --> 00:16:24,880
Getting undressed.
319
00:16:24,881 --> 00:16:26,309
What for?
320
00:16:26,310 --> 00:16:28,900
Well, I usually get undressed to go to
bed, don't I?
321
00:16:29,010 --> 00:16:30,870
I've done that ever since I was a child.
322
00:16:31,690 --> 00:16:33,650
Well, you can't strip off in here.
323
00:16:34,090 --> 00:16:36,500
What do you want me to strip off in the
wardrobe?
324
00:16:36,990 --> 00:16:39,650
Well, you can go outside, get undressed
there.
325
00:16:40,030 --> 00:16:42,380
I'm not stripping off in that drafty
corridor.
326
00:16:43,170 --> 00:16:44,220
Well, wait until...
327
00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:47,400
can come in and get undressed.
328
00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:48,690
Oh, I see.
329
00:16:49,460 --> 00:16:52,110
It's all right for you to have a
butcher's, but not me.
330
00:16:55,780 --> 00:16:57,060
Don't flatter yourself.
331
00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:00,160
I'll pull the clothes over my head.
332
00:17:00,420 --> 00:17:03,610
I don't know what you're so modest
about. I've seen it all before.
333
00:17:05,260 --> 00:17:06,540
Not mine, you haven't.
334
00:17:06,541 --> 00:17:12,318
Well, you know, there's nothing to be
ashamed of in the human body. I mean,
335
00:17:12,319 --> 00:17:13,369
we're only animals.
336
00:17:20,490 --> 00:17:21,540
Wound's better.
337
00:17:21,569 --> 00:17:24,230
Eh? Oh, yeah, well, it comes and goes.
338
00:17:25,089 --> 00:17:31,070
Oh! And it's moved as well. It was in
the other leg before.
339
00:17:31,750 --> 00:17:33,490
Well, it's the other wound, you see.
340
00:17:34,850 --> 00:17:36,710
You've got two war wounds.
341
00:17:37,090 --> 00:17:38,770
As a matter of fact, I've got three.
342
00:17:39,210 --> 00:17:41,500
The other one only hurts when I ride a
bicycle.
343
00:17:55,440 --> 00:17:56,520
something. No, thanks.
344
00:17:57,260 --> 00:17:58,310
Wife all right?
345
00:17:58,311 --> 00:17:59,939
Oh, yeah, she's fine, thank you.
346
00:17:59,940 --> 00:18:01,820
Don't come in yet, I'm not impressed.
347
00:18:03,760 --> 00:18:05,100
She's very shy, you see.
348
00:18:06,240 --> 00:18:07,360
She sounds it.
349
00:18:07,680 --> 00:18:09,790
Yeah, well, we haven't been married
long.
350
00:18:10,320 --> 00:18:11,370
How long?
351
00:18:12,460 --> 00:18:13,510
This morning.
352
00:18:14,640 --> 00:18:16,200
You're on your honeymoon.
353
00:18:17,620 --> 00:18:19,160
I suppose I am.
354
00:18:28,430 --> 00:18:30,720
What is it, love? They're a honeymoon
couple.
355
00:18:31,130 --> 00:18:32,180
Isn't it romantic?
356
00:18:33,210 --> 00:18:34,650
Some fellas have all the luck.
357
00:18:34,870 --> 00:18:39,130
Arthur, you will be careful, won't you?
358
00:18:39,730 --> 00:18:40,950
Pardon? Of the bed.
359
00:18:41,290 --> 00:18:42,340
Oh, yes.
360
00:18:43,910 --> 00:18:46,170
It's like my Arthur passed its best.
361
00:18:46,450 --> 00:18:49,330
Yes. It's all right. You can come in
now. I'm ready.
362
00:18:49,650 --> 00:18:51,050
Excuse me. Get stuck in.
363
00:18:51,410 --> 00:18:52,650
Get stuck in, Zodiac.
364
00:18:53,330 --> 00:18:54,380
Show your boots.
365
00:19:01,500 --> 00:19:02,550
I've come overall.
366
00:19:03,020 --> 00:19:04,070
You know.
367
00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:06,980
Good. We won't need this then.
368
00:19:11,951 --> 00:19:13,439
What
369
00:19:13,440 --> 00:19:21,699
do
370
00:19:21,700 --> 00:19:22,419
you want?
371
00:19:22,420 --> 00:19:24,819
Would you mind coming to the surface for
a minute?
372
00:19:24,820 --> 00:19:25,870
Are you decent?
373
00:19:26,260 --> 00:19:27,310
No.
374
00:19:27,520 --> 00:19:29,870
But I'm fully dressed, if that's what
you mean.
375
00:19:33,580 --> 00:19:35,400
No, I'm cold.
376
00:19:35,940 --> 00:19:39,370
Well, I can't keep in that chair with my
string vest and my long johns.
377
00:19:39,380 --> 00:19:40,430
You're selfish.
378
00:20:08,881 --> 00:20:13,949
disturb you, but I wonder if you could
do me a favour.
379
00:20:13,950 --> 00:20:15,110
I know what it is.
380
00:20:15,710 --> 00:20:16,760
You're nervous.
381
00:20:16,761 --> 00:20:20,309
No, no, no. Would you like a drop of
something? Give you a bit of Dutch
382
00:20:20,310 --> 00:20:22,300
No, no. Look, I know exactly how you
feel.
383
00:20:22,590 --> 00:20:25,710
My Arthur was a bag of nerves on our
first night.
384
00:20:25,711 --> 00:20:29,129
Give it away. Listen, come in and have a
large scotch. It's a good idea, but all
385
00:20:29,130 --> 00:20:30,510
I want is an extra blanket.
386
00:20:31,410 --> 00:20:32,460
An extra blanket?
387
00:20:32,930 --> 00:20:34,130
On your honeymoon?
388
00:20:34,890 --> 00:20:40,130
Well, I'm cold after the jungle, you
know. Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realise.
389
00:20:40,131 --> 00:20:43,139
Look, there's a couple of spare blankets
in that cupboard under the stairs.
390
00:20:43,140 --> 00:20:44,940
Thank you very much. You're very kind.
391
00:20:46,640 --> 00:20:47,740
Are you coming to bed?
392
00:20:49,140 --> 00:20:50,190
Arthur.
393
00:20:50,480 --> 00:20:51,860
Arthur, I've been thinking.
394
00:20:51,861 --> 00:20:53,719
Look, they're on their honeymoon.
395
00:20:53,720 --> 00:20:56,479
Why don't we give them our room? They'll
be much more comfortable.
396
00:20:56,480 --> 00:20:58,279
Well, what about us? Oh, don't be so
selfish.
397
00:20:58,280 --> 00:21:00,939
Oh, all right then. Look, I tell you
what. You go and tell them and I'll go
398
00:21:00,940 --> 00:21:01,659
change the sheets.
399
00:21:01,660 --> 00:21:02,710
Right -o.
400
00:21:11,020 --> 00:21:12,070
Go away!
401
00:21:13,540 --> 00:21:14,590
Excuse me?
402
00:21:14,940 --> 00:21:17,530
It's no use your pleading. You're not
going to get it.
403
00:21:18,011 --> 00:21:23,379
Well, I hope so. I've just emptied the
hot water bottle.
404
00:21:23,380 --> 00:21:26,140
No, just take your clothes off and get
on the chair.
405
00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:30,560
I don't think Doris would like that.
406
00:21:31,700 --> 00:21:32,920
Oh, I'm sorry.
407
00:21:33,840 --> 00:21:36,730
You go with Arthur. We're giving you our
room for the night.
408
00:21:36,920 --> 00:21:39,630
Oh, no, really? No, we insist. It'll be
much more comfy.
409
00:21:39,631 --> 00:21:42,379
Arthur, you go and set the electric
fires on. Yes, love.
410
00:21:42,380 --> 00:21:46,299
Well, it's very kind of you. Oh, no,
it's a pleasure. It's lovely and warm in
411
00:21:46,300 --> 00:21:47,699
there. You'll be comfortable.
412
00:21:47,700 --> 00:21:50,290
It's a pleasure to give it to you. Thank
you. All right.
413
00:21:50,540 --> 00:21:51,590
Good night.
414
00:21:51,760 --> 00:21:52,810
Good night.
415
00:22:31,660 --> 00:22:32,710
to bed.
416
00:22:38,340 --> 00:22:40,060
Bed? Yes.
417
00:22:41,020 --> 00:22:42,860
Did you say come to bed?
418
00:22:43,640 --> 00:22:45,460
Come on, hurry up.
419
00:23:19,850 --> 00:23:20,900
He chucked us out.
420
00:23:22,110 --> 00:23:23,550
What a lovely story, Daddy.
421
00:23:23,790 --> 00:23:26,920
Yeah, groovy. It makes the naked flesh
sound like the epilogue.
422
00:23:26,921 --> 00:23:28,809
So where did you finally spend the
night?
423
00:23:28,810 --> 00:23:31,409
We went back to the station waiting room
and slept there.
424
00:23:31,410 --> 00:23:33,590
What? You did share a room? Not really.
425
00:23:33,591 --> 00:23:36,969
Your mother slept in the waiting room. I
slept in the ladies' loo.
426
00:23:36,970 --> 00:23:39,189
How did you two ever make the team
together?
427
00:23:39,190 --> 00:23:40,390
Oh, just my personality.
428
00:23:40,391 --> 00:23:43,969
The very next day she was round at my
place begging and pleading with me.
429
00:23:43,970 --> 00:23:45,590
I had to. He'd take my suitcase.
430
00:23:48,170 --> 00:23:49,510
I still fancy you.
431
00:23:49,790 --> 00:23:52,990
Hang on, Sal. I can hear the rumblings
of a population explosion.
432
00:23:53,470 --> 00:23:54,520
Darling,
433
00:23:56,030 --> 00:23:57,230
it was a lovely surprise.
434
00:23:57,231 --> 00:24:00,669
I've got another surprise for you.
What's that?
435
00:24:00,670 --> 00:24:01,759
I haven't brought me wallet.
436
00:24:01,760 --> 00:24:06,310
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