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1
00:00:01,610 --> 00:00:06,510
A fine romance with no kisses.
2
00:00:06,930 --> 00:00:13,649
A fine romance, my friend, this is. They
think we're like a
3
00:00:13,650 --> 00:00:15,550
couple of hot tomatoes.
4
00:00:16,370 --> 00:00:20,850
But we're as cold as yesterday's map of
top toes.
5
00:00:21,470 --> 00:00:26,890
A fine romance with no wrestling.
6
00:00:27,110 --> 00:00:29,570
A fine romance.
7
00:00:29,980 --> 00:00:35,580
with no nestling. We might as well play
bridge with our maiden arms.
8
00:00:36,260 --> 00:00:38,100
Love hasn't got a charm.
9
00:00:39,260 --> 00:00:40,900
This is a fine romance.
10
00:00:46,220 --> 00:00:47,320
One minute to go.
11
00:00:47,660 --> 00:00:49,400
Laura, it's just a cake.
12
00:00:49,660 --> 00:00:52,550
You're making it sound like a launch
from Kate Canaveral.
13
00:00:52,700 --> 00:00:55,110
My baby cake, the two events are not
dissimilar.
14
00:00:55,400 --> 00:00:57,810
It's a knife edge between triumph and
disaster.
15
00:00:58,440 --> 00:01:03,060
It can't go wrong. Can if I made it. But
I supervised every move you made.
16
00:01:03,061 --> 00:01:07,339
Leonardo da Vinci supervised his pupils,
but they didn't all produce Mona Lisas,
17
00:01:07,340 --> 00:01:08,390
did they?
18
00:01:09,320 --> 00:01:11,980
Thirty seconds and counting.
19
00:01:12,260 --> 00:01:13,840
You're making me nervous now.
20
00:01:14,120 --> 00:01:15,680
Not being able to see it.
21
00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:19,600
At least when I cook things in a
saucepan I can see them go wrong.
22
00:01:20,180 --> 00:01:22,020
It can't go wrong.
23
00:01:38,500 --> 00:01:40,940
of a bouncing baby cake.
24
00:01:42,300 --> 00:01:43,350
It worked!
25
00:01:43,351 --> 00:01:44,619
What did it?
26
00:01:44,620 --> 00:01:45,670
Of course it worked.
27
00:01:45,671 --> 00:01:49,439
Do you think I'm ready to try a souffle?
Not today. I don't think my nose could
28
00:01:49,440 --> 00:01:50,490
stand it. No.
29
00:01:50,540 --> 00:01:51,590
No, quite right.
30
00:01:51,660 --> 00:01:52,860
Quit while you're ahead.
31
00:01:53,860 --> 00:01:55,660
All that interest in cooking.
32
00:01:55,920 --> 00:01:57,720
I assume Mike is the reason.
33
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Well, I suppose he is.
34
00:01:59,980 --> 00:02:01,960
We tend to eat in rather a lot.
35
00:02:02,800 --> 00:02:04,730
When we eat out, if you know what I
mean.
36
00:02:08,970 --> 00:02:13,170
He says, and he's quite right, that
eating out is very expensive these days.
37
00:02:13,690 --> 00:02:16,930
But he does wine and dine you sometimes,
doesn't he? Oh, yes.
38
00:02:17,970 --> 00:02:23,230
Well, not exactly wine and dine me, it's
lager and hamburger me.
39
00:02:24,650 --> 00:02:27,290
And when you eat in, he does bring the
wine?
40
00:02:28,410 --> 00:02:30,190
Yes, he brought a bottle last week.
41
00:02:30,191 --> 00:02:34,349
But as we're only halfway through that
case of German stuff I got for the
42
00:02:34,350 --> 00:02:37,569
translation, I thought we might as well
work our way through that, so we are.
43
00:02:37,570 --> 00:02:38,620
Flowers?
44
00:02:39,220 --> 00:02:41,390
No, he'd feel silly if I bought him
flowers.
45
00:02:42,020 --> 00:02:43,140
You know what I mean.
46
00:02:43,380 --> 00:02:44,700
Does he bring you flowers?
47
00:02:45,280 --> 00:02:46,720
Well, we're a bit old for that.
48
00:02:46,780 --> 00:02:47,830
He doesn't?
49
00:02:48,120 --> 00:02:50,220
No. Sounds mean to me.
50
00:02:50,221 --> 00:02:51,459
No.
51
00:02:51,460 --> 00:02:52,510
Careful.
52
00:02:53,020 --> 00:02:54,520
That's what he is. He's careful.
53
00:02:55,640 --> 00:02:57,540
Well, frugal even.
54
00:03:00,100 --> 00:03:01,150
Mean.
55
00:03:01,460 --> 00:03:04,110
He is mean. I've never really thought
about it before.
56
00:03:05,200 --> 00:03:07,430
I've a good mind not to share my cake
with him.
57
00:03:08,180 --> 00:03:09,230
Oh!
58
00:03:09,340 --> 00:03:13,500
Hello, you two.
59
00:03:14,500 --> 00:03:16,200
Hello, Finn. Hello, love.
60
00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:18,840
Any coffee in the pot? Yes.
61
00:03:19,900 --> 00:03:20,950
Piece of cake.
62
00:03:21,020 --> 00:03:22,070
Ah.
63
00:03:22,820 --> 00:03:23,870
Ah.
64
00:03:23,960 --> 00:03:27,020
No, I don't know. You made it, right?
How did you get it?
65
00:03:30,660 --> 00:03:32,680
What's the matter? You look a bit fed
up.
66
00:03:33,160 --> 00:03:34,210
Yes, I'm a bit.
67
00:03:34,211 --> 00:03:36,239
I've been looking at Mike's books.
68
00:03:36,240 --> 00:03:38,030
Mike? Yeah, it's not a jolly read.
69
00:03:38,490 --> 00:03:41,430
I'm no accountant, but that business of
his is in trouble.
70
00:03:42,590 --> 00:03:43,640
Why?
71
00:03:44,050 --> 00:03:45,550
Basically a cash flow problem.
72
00:03:45,670 --> 00:03:46,750
No cash, no flow.
73
00:03:47,670 --> 00:03:48,720
Oh.
74
00:03:48,721 --> 00:03:50,769
What are you looking like that for?
75
00:03:50,770 --> 00:03:52,410
We were just calling him mean.
76
00:03:52,730 --> 00:03:54,730
Mean? You have to have money to be mean.
77
00:03:54,731 --> 00:03:59,069
Still, these things have a way of
righting themselves, don't they?
78
00:03:59,070 --> 00:04:00,630
You seen a Poseidon adventure?
79
00:04:02,050 --> 00:04:03,100
Where's Mike now?
80
00:04:03,101 --> 00:04:05,899
Well, from the way he looked when I left
him, probably about to jump off the
81
00:04:05,900 --> 00:04:06,950
nearest bridge.
82
00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:09,100
I think I'll go and see him.
83
00:04:09,380 --> 00:04:10,820
Do you want to take your cake?
84
00:04:12,940 --> 00:04:15,180
Um... No.
85
00:04:15,181 --> 00:04:20,199
If he is about to jump off the nearest
bridge, he might be tempted to hang that
86
00:04:20,200 --> 00:04:21,460
round his neck as a weight.
87
00:04:30,200 --> 00:04:32,490
I shouldn't be doing this by rights, you
know.
88
00:04:32,680 --> 00:04:33,730
I'm a craftsman.
89
00:04:34,200 --> 00:04:36,260
I shouldn't be doing this by rights.
90
00:04:38,540 --> 00:04:39,680
I'm a company director.
91
00:04:40,120 --> 00:04:41,170
What do you mean, I?
92
00:04:41,500 --> 00:04:42,550
You're they.
93
00:04:42,551 --> 00:04:43,519
You're it.
94
00:04:43,520 --> 00:04:44,840
Yeah, that's right.
95
00:04:48,480 --> 00:04:49,920
I should have a labourer.
96
00:04:51,100 --> 00:04:52,150
You've got one.
97
00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:56,360
Stop moaning and get humping.
98
00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:03,150
If this was a union shop, I'd have to
have a labourer.
99
00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:07,800
I saw one man have a union.
100
00:05:15,300 --> 00:05:17,100
There'd be two of us if I'd a labourer.
101
00:05:18,280 --> 00:05:19,330
I'll tell you what.
102
00:05:20,100 --> 00:05:23,680
Have a mass meeting with yourself and
take a vote on it.
103
00:05:24,280 --> 00:05:27,420
In the meantime, just shift yourself and
get going.
104
00:05:29,790 --> 00:05:30,850
I'm not loaded yet.
105
00:05:31,510 --> 00:05:32,560
Yes, you are.
106
00:05:32,750 --> 00:05:33,800
I'm not.
107
00:05:33,810 --> 00:05:36,160
There's not enough slabs here for the
old path.
108
00:05:36,250 --> 00:05:38,110
Oh, there's enough to be going on with.
109
00:05:38,111 --> 00:05:40,509
That's all we've got in stock at the
moment.
110
00:05:40,510 --> 00:05:44,369
You know what? I reckon a San Francisco
earthquake was more organised than you
111
00:05:44,370 --> 00:05:45,420
are. Stop, brother.
112
00:05:45,670 --> 00:05:48,080
Just leave these things to the
management, eh?
113
00:05:49,210 --> 00:05:51,680
I'm expecting a delivery in the very
near future.
114
00:05:51,681 --> 00:05:55,189
In other words, they're holding back
until you paper this look. I wish you'd
115
00:05:55,190 --> 00:05:57,349
lead the running of this company to
those who know.
116
00:05:57,350 --> 00:05:58,850
I would if anyone did.
117
00:06:02,810 --> 00:06:06,850
This thing should be in a museum. No, go
on, clear off.
118
00:06:28,650 --> 00:06:30,090
He's gonna tell me something.
119
00:06:41,250 --> 00:06:42,850
Yeah, Mike?
120
00:07:03,850 --> 00:07:04,900
I bought you a jersey.
121
00:07:06,390 --> 00:07:10,330
Why? I mean... Thanks very much.
122
00:07:12,410 --> 00:07:13,460
Why?
123
00:07:14,330 --> 00:07:16,380
I have days when I buy jerseys for
people.
124
00:07:21,010 --> 00:07:22,060
It's very expensive.
125
00:07:22,061 --> 00:07:24,129
Why don't I get a cup of tea or
something?
126
00:07:24,130 --> 00:07:25,180
Oh, yeah, yeah.
127
00:07:25,181 --> 00:07:27,389
Yes, perhaps you'd like to go into the
office?
128
00:07:27,390 --> 00:07:29,310
The boardroom has just been creosoted.
129
00:07:38,800 --> 00:07:40,780
The cleaner didn't turn up this morning.
130
00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:44,310
Well, I like a place of work to look
like a place of work.
131
00:07:44,440 --> 00:07:46,790
I wouldn't feel comfortable if it was
too tidy.
132
00:07:46,980 --> 00:07:48,030
Just as well, really.
133
00:07:49,920 --> 00:07:50,970
Filthy, isn't it?
134
00:07:52,380 --> 00:07:55,640
Well, at least you didn't say this place
needs a woman's touch.
135
00:07:56,420 --> 00:07:57,470
Well, I couldn't.
136
00:07:58,380 --> 00:08:01,080
A gang of women, perhaps. Very strong
women.
137
00:08:01,900 --> 00:08:02,980
East German athlete?
138
00:08:03,160 --> 00:08:04,300
That sort of thing, yes.
139
00:08:08,720 --> 00:08:10,220
Filth apart, how's business?
140
00:08:10,460 --> 00:08:12,560
Well, you know, up and down.
141
00:08:13,800 --> 00:08:15,120
I saw Phil this morning.
142
00:08:16,100 --> 00:08:17,150
Oh.
143
00:08:17,440 --> 00:08:18,720
Why didn't you tell me?
144
00:08:19,380 --> 00:08:20,430
Oh, well.
145
00:08:21,180 --> 00:08:25,899
Another business going busted. Hardly a
riveting conversation, is it? You don't
146
00:08:25,900 --> 00:08:26,950
have to rivet me.
147
00:08:27,120 --> 00:08:28,740
Sounds rather rude, doesn't it?
148
00:08:29,580 --> 00:08:30,660
Yes, it does rather.
149
00:08:32,380 --> 00:08:34,440
There's no harm in confiding in a
friend.
150
00:08:34,740 --> 00:08:37,620
Oh, well, I've never been a great
confider. I mean, uh...
151
00:08:38,010 --> 00:08:42,089
When I was a kid, you know, just round
about the time you're supposed to go
152
00:08:42,090 --> 00:08:48,289
blind if you keep on... ..doing it, I...
153
00:08:48,290 --> 00:08:55,269
I had a stye on my eyelid and I wanted
to tell
154
00:08:55,270 --> 00:08:57,190
somebody about it then, but I couldn't.
155
00:08:58,250 --> 00:09:03,770
No, so I wrote a note and put it in my
satchel so that if I did go blind,
156
00:09:03,870 --> 00:09:06,580
somebody would find it and realise what
had happened.
157
00:09:08,490 --> 00:09:09,630
You should have told me.
158
00:09:10,290 --> 00:09:11,610
Well, I didn't know either.
159
00:09:12,170 --> 00:09:13,510
What about this business?
160
00:09:17,190 --> 00:09:18,290
How bad is it?
161
00:09:19,290 --> 00:09:25,829
Well, not to put too fine a point on it,
Phil reckons I ought to declare myself
162
00:09:25,830 --> 00:09:26,880
bankrupt.
163
00:09:27,270 --> 00:09:28,320
Oh, my.
164
00:09:28,910 --> 00:09:30,710
That's a horrible phrase, isn't it?
165
00:09:30,970 --> 00:09:34,290
Sounds as though you've got the plague
or something.
166
00:09:34,870 --> 00:09:36,670
Did they put a big cross on your door?
167
00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:39,300
Yes, or an... Would you like sugar?
168
00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:42,200
Yeah. Yeah, either that or an inverted
pound sign.
169
00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:46,140
Well, I blame the government. Yeah,
well, so do I.
170
00:09:47,180 --> 00:09:50,370
But then if the other lot were in power,
I suppose I'd blame them.
171
00:09:52,020 --> 00:09:53,070
Oh, it's me, really.
172
00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:57,060
You see, I get it all wrong.
173
00:09:58,540 --> 00:10:00,000
I'm good at my job, I know that.
174
00:10:00,880 --> 00:10:05,240
I'm no capability brown, but I am good
at my job. It's the organ, I think.
175
00:10:05,610 --> 00:10:12,609
It's the VAT and the tax and the
bookkeeping and... I'm sorry, I'm
176
00:10:12,610 --> 00:10:13,660
getting boring. No.
177
00:10:14,250 --> 00:10:17,320
This beats telling people about the
thigh on your eye any day.
178
00:10:17,830 --> 00:10:20,190
But what about debtors? You must have
debtors.
179
00:10:20,470 --> 00:10:26,569
Oh, yes, a few, but it's such piddling
little amounts that I'm not the sort to
180
00:10:26,570 --> 00:10:27,830
go round with an Alsatian.
181
00:10:28,130 --> 00:10:29,180
What about the bank?
182
00:10:29,510 --> 00:10:31,030
I already owe them.
183
00:10:31,031 --> 00:10:32,109
Well, owe them more.
184
00:10:32,110 --> 00:10:33,490
Banks love being owed money.
185
00:10:33,610 --> 00:10:34,670
Well -known fact.
186
00:10:35,580 --> 00:10:36,900
Yes, I suppose I could try.
187
00:10:37,160 --> 00:10:38,210
Phone them now.
188
00:10:39,760 --> 00:10:40,810
Now?
189
00:10:41,240 --> 00:10:44,040
Yes. Well, no, I can't now.
190
00:10:44,620 --> 00:10:47,030
I've got lots of things to do. What's
the number?
191
00:10:47,060 --> 00:10:49,410
Now, don't get bossy. No, I'm not
getting bossy.
192
00:10:49,411 --> 00:10:53,139
I just don't want to find your satchel
on the parapet of a bridge with a note
193
00:10:53,140 --> 00:10:54,460
it. Now, what's the number?
194
00:10:54,780 --> 00:10:59,080
Three, four, five... Oh, no, I'll have
to look it up.
195
00:10:59,420 --> 00:11:00,620
There's no dialing tone.
196
00:11:00,780 --> 00:11:01,980
Well, ring the operator.
197
00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:04,710
How can I ring the operator without a
dialing tone?
198
00:11:07,959 --> 00:11:09,009
Oh. Oh.
199
00:11:15,940 --> 00:11:16,990
It's the red one.
200
00:11:18,800 --> 00:11:19,850
Not paid.
201
00:11:20,640 --> 00:11:21,690
Nope.
202
00:11:21,691 --> 00:11:25,439
Oh, well, then, mine's over. No, no, no,
no, no. You're not getting out of it
203
00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:28,819
that way. Go round to the bank in
person. I thought you were going to say
204
00:11:28,820 --> 00:11:30,880
I'm a bit of a mess. That's all right.
205
00:11:31,580 --> 00:11:32,720
Put on your new jersey.
206
00:11:46,091 --> 00:11:49,269
You wouldn't come with me, would you?
207
00:11:49,270 --> 00:11:50,320
I insist on it.
208
00:11:51,290 --> 00:11:53,880
I'll not have you arriving there just as
they close.
209
00:11:55,210 --> 00:11:56,260
The van's out.
210
00:11:56,830 --> 00:11:57,990
We'll have to go by bus.
211
00:11:58,190 --> 00:11:59,630
I always go everywhere by bus.
212
00:12:00,250 --> 00:12:02,720
I like sitting upstairs at the front and
driving.
213
00:12:21,040 --> 00:12:25,740
Hey. This is Kashmir. I know some goats.
214
00:12:41,380 --> 00:12:43,000
Good God.
215
00:12:45,380 --> 00:12:46,980
What time do you call this?
216
00:12:48,510 --> 00:12:49,730
Oh, I'm sorry, Charlie.
217
00:12:50,050 --> 00:12:51,390
I had to see my accountant.
218
00:12:52,290 --> 00:12:54,170
You weren't tapping in for a loan.
219
00:12:54,630 --> 00:12:55,680
No, no, no.
220
00:12:56,150 --> 00:13:00,049
I wanted him to explain my accounts to
me so that I can explain them to the
221
00:13:00,050 --> 00:13:01,109
manager when he arrives.
222
00:13:01,110 --> 00:13:02,889
Well, what's he coming round here for
anyway?
223
00:13:02,890 --> 00:13:04,569
Have a look at the place generally.
224
00:13:04,570 --> 00:13:06,469
Help him make up his mind about the
loan.
225
00:13:06,470 --> 00:13:07,520
Oh, no bother.
226
00:13:07,570 --> 00:13:10,400
He'll step through that gate and turn
right round again.
227
00:13:10,410 --> 00:13:11,750
Oh, you're a real comfort.
228
00:13:11,751 --> 00:13:14,869
Anyway, thanks for the clean -up,
Charlie.
229
00:13:14,870 --> 00:13:16,690
Didn't have to do it. Oh, no, I didn't.
230
00:13:17,240 --> 00:13:20,360
I didn't intend to. No proper work for a
skilled man.
231
00:13:20,900 --> 00:13:21,950
See, women.
232
00:13:23,360 --> 00:13:24,410
What women?
233
00:13:24,980 --> 00:13:26,400
They're women in the office.
234
00:13:28,480 --> 00:13:30,720
Bossy couple. One of them in particular.
235
00:13:31,160 --> 00:13:32,900
Your wife's a right little cracker.
236
00:13:34,100 --> 00:13:36,480
I don't care if they're Elsie and Doris
Waters.
237
00:13:36,920 --> 00:13:39,690
They've got no right to be bellicose
with a skilled man.
238
00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:42,860
In the union, you'd have a stoppage on
your hands.
239
00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:44,780
Oh, thanks anyway, Charlie.
240
00:13:45,689 --> 00:13:47,249
Yeah, I bought this pipe myself.
241
00:13:50,041 --> 00:13:52,069
All right.
242
00:13:52,070 --> 00:13:53,120
I'll eat to me.
243
00:14:14,370 --> 00:14:16,660
You said it would take these German
athletes.
244
00:14:16,870 --> 00:14:18,310
Mit Heidi und Trudy.
245
00:14:20,570 --> 00:14:22,930
Well, I don't know what to say.
246
00:14:23,510 --> 00:14:24,630
Try Guten Morgen.
247
00:14:27,290 --> 00:14:29,750
You're a smasher, both of you. Thanks.
248
00:14:29,990 --> 00:14:31,770
Don't thank me. I was press -ganged.
249
00:14:31,970 --> 00:14:34,500
By the way, I bought you some decent
cups and sauce.
250
00:14:34,501 --> 00:14:38,039
In my experience, bank managers are very
influenced by what they drink, I
251
00:14:38,040 --> 00:14:41,039
thought. In my experience, they're very
influenced by a short skirt.
252
00:14:41,040 --> 00:14:44,799
No, I'll give him tea out of a deepened
cup when I'm not wearing a short skirt.
253
00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:48,599
Now, remember, ask for more than you
want. Then he can offer you less without
254
00:14:48,600 --> 00:14:49,619
losing face.
255
00:14:49,620 --> 00:14:53,170
Well, as he's not Japanese, I don't
suppose he cares about losing face.
256
00:14:53,780 --> 00:14:54,840
He might just say no.
257
00:14:55,160 --> 00:14:56,210
No, think positive.
258
00:14:56,780 --> 00:14:57,830
All right.
259
00:14:58,360 --> 00:15:01,580
He will say no. No, and you don't be so
pessimistic.
260
00:15:04,389 --> 00:15:05,930
Well, look at it.
261
00:15:06,390 --> 00:15:11,469
I mean, you can disguise the dirt, but
you can't disguise the facts. Now, what
262
00:15:11,470 --> 00:15:13,030
have I actually got to show him?
263
00:15:13,230 --> 00:15:14,350
A rotten old shed?
264
00:15:15,290 --> 00:15:16,690
A beat -up old van?
265
00:15:17,210 --> 00:15:18,550
A staff of one?
266
00:15:19,210 --> 00:15:21,570
And a pile of old debts?
267
00:15:21,571 --> 00:15:25,709
Winston Churchill wouldn't have talked
like that. He would, if he'd owned this
268
00:15:25,710 --> 00:15:26,760
place.
269
00:15:29,070 --> 00:15:32,090
I'm sorry, I'm whining.
270
00:15:33,050 --> 00:15:35,150
It's women, you see. What about women?
271
00:15:35,670 --> 00:15:41,869
Well, they're easier to whine to, and
once you get started, you want to go
272
00:15:41,870 --> 00:15:43,270
on and on.
273
00:15:46,350 --> 00:15:49,590
Oh, I feel like having a damn good cry,
actually.
274
00:15:49,591 --> 00:15:52,729
I don't think bank managers are much
impressed by tear -stained faces.
275
00:15:52,730 --> 00:15:54,970
Not men's tear -stained faces.
276
00:15:55,550 --> 00:15:57,650
Well, probably not.
277
00:15:58,730 --> 00:16:01,230
Anyway, thanks for the support.
278
00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:04,780
And if I get the loan, it's champagne
all right.
279
00:16:04,781 --> 00:16:06,019
You're on.
280
00:16:06,020 --> 00:16:07,820
Well, I think that's everything.
281
00:16:11,080 --> 00:16:12,130
Oh.
282
00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:14,010
Hello.
283
00:16:14,011 --> 00:16:17,599
I bought you a cake to have with your
tea.
284
00:16:17,600 --> 00:16:18,660
Oh, thanks, Helen.
285
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:26,020
Good luck, Mike.
286
00:16:51,121 --> 00:16:53,029
It's gone then.
287
00:16:53,030 --> 00:16:54,080
Yep.
288
00:17:08,390 --> 00:17:09,440
Well?
289
00:17:09,849 --> 00:17:14,669
He was a nice man, Charlie. Not just a
computer in a suit. He cared. He really
290
00:17:14,670 --> 00:17:15,269
did care.
291
00:17:15,270 --> 00:17:16,269
He was a nice man.
292
00:17:16,270 --> 00:17:17,320
Didn't get a load?
293
00:17:17,490 --> 00:17:18,540
No.
294
00:17:18,849 --> 00:17:19,989
I didn't think he would.
295
00:17:21,290 --> 00:17:23,390
Well, I can't say I blame him, really.
296
00:17:23,810 --> 00:17:27,649
The way he explained the current
financial situation to me, I felt like
297
00:17:27,650 --> 00:17:28,700
him some money.
298
00:17:29,290 --> 00:17:30,340
So what happens?
299
00:17:30,950 --> 00:17:37,389
Well, either I go bust now, or I make a
real fight of it
300
00:17:37,390 --> 00:17:39,650
and go bust in three months' time.
301
00:17:40,150 --> 00:17:41,230
I'll be out of a job.
302
00:17:42,570 --> 00:17:43,620
Afraid so.
303
00:17:46,010 --> 00:17:50,110
I've been thinking about that, and I've
got no idea. No, Charlie.
304
00:17:50,670 --> 00:17:52,470
You ain't heard it yet. I don't have to.
305
00:17:52,870 --> 00:17:55,640
Don't take me in with that old moodie of
yours, you know.
306
00:17:55,930 --> 00:18:00,529
You're the sort of old idiot who'd
refuse to go. The sort of old idiot
307
00:18:00,530 --> 00:18:01,910
stop on and work for nothing.
308
00:18:02,150 --> 00:18:03,200
Leave off.
309
00:18:03,590 --> 00:18:06,890
What? The day you can't pay my wages,
I'm off.
310
00:18:11,330 --> 00:18:13,790
Now, you see, my idea was this.
311
00:18:14,310 --> 00:18:17,490
I've got a little bit of money, poor
boy. No, no, no, Charlie.
312
00:18:18,370 --> 00:18:19,610
No, I can't have you.
313
00:18:20,139 --> 00:18:21,920
Pouring good money after bad.
314
00:18:22,260 --> 00:18:23,310
Well, it's my money.
315
00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:25,120
I'll do what I like with it.
316
00:18:26,140 --> 00:18:28,260
Anyway, it ain't a bad little business.
317
00:18:28,780 --> 00:18:32,000
And I wouldn't mind owning a bit of it.
Oh, Charlie.
318
00:18:33,500 --> 00:18:35,160
No, not this.
319
00:18:36,280 --> 00:18:38,810
My brother -in -law smooths out his
tobacco -ness.
320
00:18:43,920 --> 00:18:50,780
You see, what I'm trying to say is this.
Now, look. Don't you worry about me.
321
00:18:50,980 --> 00:18:53,300
Of course, I've got options. Thanks,
Charlie.
322
00:18:53,620 --> 00:18:54,670
That's all right.
323
00:18:54,811 --> 00:18:59,299
Right, well, when will you make your
mind up?
324
00:18:59,300 --> 00:19:00,500
Soon. I'll let you know.
325
00:19:00,720 --> 00:19:01,770
Ah, good.
326
00:19:04,440 --> 00:19:05,580
I've done had me dinner.
327
00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:09,220
Of course, then there'd be me redundancy
money.
328
00:19:10,660 --> 00:19:11,740
Oh, that's in a pint.
329
00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:13,690
Have it on me.
330
00:19:21,021 --> 00:19:28,349
this habit of shutting yourself in
somewhere any time anybody disagrees
331
00:19:28,350 --> 00:19:30,150
you. Agree with me, then.
332
00:19:30,870 --> 00:19:33,170
Phil. It's your sister. I said my piece.
333
00:19:33,390 --> 00:19:35,470
Well, say it again, more eloquently.
334
00:19:35,471 --> 00:19:36,769
All right.
335
00:19:36,770 --> 00:19:37,970
Laura, you're crackers.
336
00:19:39,670 --> 00:19:40,720
I'm not.
337
00:19:42,190 --> 00:19:43,570
Somebody's got to help Mike.
338
00:19:43,571 --> 00:19:47,189
The bank won't, and if I want to lend
him some of my money, then it's my
339
00:19:47,190 --> 00:19:51,309
business. I know that look. You used to
look like that when you wouldn't eat two
340
00:19:51,310 --> 00:19:53,720
greens. I used to win through, though,
didn't I?
341
00:19:53,721 --> 00:19:56,739
Your hair didn't curl, though, did it? I
didn't want curly hair. Then why did
342
00:19:56,740 --> 00:19:59,799
you try to cut mine off with a garden
shin? This is all very fascinating.
343
00:19:59,800 --> 00:20:01,600
talking about money, not curly hair.
344
00:20:01,601 --> 00:20:05,319
But, Laura, for the last time, if you
put money into Mike's business, you
345
00:20:05,320 --> 00:20:06,799
just as well flush it down the loo.
346
00:20:06,800 --> 00:20:10,399
I mean, for all you know, he might take
your money and disappear to the south of
347
00:20:10,400 --> 00:20:13,110
France. Look, you were the two who
brought us together.
348
00:20:13,111 --> 00:20:16,179
You're the two who keep telling me what
a decent chap he is. Now, all of a
349
00:20:16,180 --> 00:20:19,079
sudden, he's Ronald B. Yeah, and there's
another thing. He might not like owing
350
00:20:19,080 --> 00:20:19,799
you money.
351
00:20:19,800 --> 00:20:23,050
It's no good for the relationship, the
man owing the woman money.
352
00:20:23,180 --> 00:20:25,940
particularly for the man. It has a
neutering effect.
353
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:29,600
Does that fit the piano?
354
00:20:30,420 --> 00:20:31,680
Have you quite finished?
355
00:20:32,240 --> 00:20:34,920
Well, what about you two giving him some
money?
356
00:20:35,740 --> 00:20:37,640
It's all right. I'm joking. I'm joking.
357
00:20:40,560 --> 00:20:42,180
Not one word about this. Not one.
358
00:20:42,400 --> 00:20:45,710
If you do, I'll keep cooking food and
forcing it down your throats.
359
00:20:49,060 --> 00:20:50,110
Good evening.
360
00:20:53,150 --> 00:20:54,810
Champagne Charlie is my name.
361
00:20:55,441 --> 00:20:57,469
Crack up.
362
00:20:57,470 --> 00:20:58,389
He's drunk.
363
00:20:58,390 --> 00:20:59,440
Mike.
364
00:21:01,310 --> 00:21:03,490
I nearly quit.
365
00:21:03,870 --> 00:21:04,950
I really did.
366
00:21:05,230 --> 00:21:06,390
But you haven't. No.
367
00:21:07,150 --> 00:21:10,710
So way landscape gardening lives.
368
00:21:11,290 --> 00:21:12,340
How?
369
00:21:12,570 --> 00:21:15,310
I've decided how I can raise the money.
370
00:21:16,390 --> 00:21:17,440
That's how.
371
00:21:17,830 --> 00:21:18,880
Well?
372
00:21:19,250 --> 00:21:20,510
I'm going to tell my house.
373
00:21:21,190 --> 00:21:22,470
It suddenly hit me.
374
00:21:22,860 --> 00:21:24,680
I've only got three assets left.
375
00:21:25,040 --> 00:21:28,520
The will to stay in business, a nice new
jersey, and my house.
376
00:21:28,900 --> 00:21:30,280
So I'm going to sell my house.
377
00:21:30,320 --> 00:21:31,370
You're crackers.
378
00:21:31,371 --> 00:21:33,359
According to you, everyone's crackers
today.
379
00:21:33,360 --> 00:21:34,410
Mike, you're insane.
380
00:21:34,520 --> 00:21:36,500
Good for you, I say. I thought you
would.
381
00:21:36,780 --> 00:21:39,310
It's the brotherhood of the self
-employed, see?
382
00:21:39,311 --> 00:21:42,859
OK, so you make the grand gesture. You
sell your house to save your business.
383
00:21:42,860 --> 00:21:45,839
Now, have you thought where you're going
to live? That was a problem.
384
00:21:45,840 --> 00:21:46,890
And then it hit me.
385
00:21:47,180 --> 00:21:50,480
And when you come to think about it,
it's blindingly obvious.
386
00:22:04,720 --> 00:22:06,520
isn't it? Why go to all that trouble?
387
00:22:06,521 --> 00:22:08,419
You could have just moved into Ralph and
House.
388
00:22:08,420 --> 00:22:10,940
No, no, no, it's too pricey. Well, I
like it.
389
00:22:11,220 --> 00:22:15,239
I'm worried about you. No, it's sort of
symbolic, isn't it? Yes, of a total
390
00:22:15,240 --> 00:22:16,360
mental collapse. No.
391
00:22:17,880 --> 00:22:19,720
No, no, no, think positively.
392
00:22:19,960 --> 00:22:22,360
The only way from here is up.
393
00:22:22,580 --> 00:22:23,660
You can say that again.
394
00:22:23,661 --> 00:22:26,199
Oh, come on, let's all go and have a
drink.
395
00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:27,250
See you in the pub.
396
00:22:30,291 --> 00:22:36,379
I was thinking of lending you some
money, but you wouldn't have taken it,
397
00:22:36,380 --> 00:22:37,430
you? No.
398
00:22:37,920 --> 00:22:39,860
Twerp. It takes one to know one.
399
00:22:41,200 --> 00:22:44,060
I was going to ask you a favour, though.
400
00:22:44,520 --> 00:22:45,570
Go on.
401
00:22:45,760 --> 00:22:48,060
Well, I mean, this place.
402
00:22:48,540 --> 00:22:49,800
Let's face it, it's a dump.
403
00:22:51,080 --> 00:22:54,560
It's not the sort of place you can spend
an evening in.
404
00:22:54,760 --> 00:22:55,810
No.
405
00:22:55,880 --> 00:22:59,070
Looking at an old lawnmower does have
limits as entertainment.
406
00:22:59,580 --> 00:23:00,630
Yeah.
407
00:23:01,560 --> 00:23:02,610
So...
408
00:23:05,240 --> 00:23:10,879
I thought that when we were spending an
evening together, I mean, your flat
409
00:23:10,880 --> 00:23:14,579
having more amenities... Oh, Mike, you
know you're welcome there whenever you
410
00:23:14,580 --> 00:23:15,630
like. Oh, thanks.
411
00:23:16,340 --> 00:23:17,660
Is that it? No.
412
00:23:18,500 --> 00:23:21,160
No, there was something else.
413
00:23:23,180 --> 00:23:24,800
It's a bit cheeky, really, but...
414
00:23:25,879 --> 00:23:30,259
As it's been my day for Cheek, I thought
I'd push my luck. Mike, the others will
415
00:23:30,260 --> 00:23:35,539
be waiting. No, no, no. I was going to
ask you all evening. I just somehow
416
00:23:35,540 --> 00:23:37,770
didn't get round to it. Well, you better
have.
417
00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:45,559
Right. And don't... Don't be... Don't be
mad at me. I
418
00:23:45,560 --> 00:23:48,330
mean, if you're offended... Mike, for
goodness sake, oh!
419
00:23:48,400 --> 00:23:51,660
Well, when I come round to your flat...
Flat, yes.
420
00:23:52,270 --> 00:23:55,590
Would you mind if I used your washing
machine?
421
00:23:58,330 --> 00:24:02,970
Oh, come on.
422
00:24:28,219 --> 00:24:35,039
A fine romance with no wrestling A
423
00:24:35,040 --> 00:24:41,699
fine romance with no nestling We two are
just as prickly as
424
00:24:41,700 --> 00:24:48,500
cactus plants Love hasn't got a chance
It is a fine romance
425
00:24:48,550 --> 00:24:53,100
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