All language subtitles for 227 s02e15 Toyland

They have no place like home.

With your family around you, you're
never alone.

When you know that you love, you don't
need to roam. Cause there's no place

home.

Times are changing every day.

We won't get by with those same old
ways.

Pulling together, we'll make it right.

With help from our friends at...

I mean, no place child.

That comes to a grand total of $240 .26.

Three weeks of fundraising, and that's
all we got?

Mm -hmm. You sure you didn't skim some
off the top?

Very funny, Pearl.

Shoot, we got 75 kids in the hospital
that need cheering up.

I was sure hoping we'd get more than
$240.

Well, we can't wait any longer to shop
for the toys.

I sure hope they like yo -yos.

Rose!

Was that a new pocketbook I saw you with
this morning?

What have we got to do?

I don't know, babe. Toys for kids is a
good idea, but money's tight for a lot

people. Ain't that the truth.

Hey, I got an idea.

Instead of buying toys for the kids, why
don't we go down and entertain them?

Oh, yeah.

Honey, you could dress up like a clown.

You mean a real clown?

Yeah. With a big red nose, floppy shoes
and a seltzer bottle? Yeah.

Forget it.

Here comes our second disaster.

Hi, Mary. I want you to meet Andrew.

Say hello.

I'm donating him to your toy drive.

Aw, look, Rose.

Oh, he's cute.

A lot cuter than the guy who gave him to
me.

And taller.

Okay. What do you want?

Oh. Mary Jenkins, I'm shocked, I'm
appalled, and I'm hurt by your attitude.

Can you give me a lift to the mall?

The toy store's right there.

Come on in.

Thanks. Hi, how you doing? Hi, Sandra.

Hi, Sandra.

Shopping again?

Uh -huh, I need a new outfit. I got the
date of my lifetime tonight.

Isn't that your third date of the
lifetime this week?

It's been a slow week.

Well, we better get going.

Yep, we gotta get going, too. We gotta
kick that train.

Yeah, y 'all better hurry up. because
that toy store closes at 5 o 'clock.

No, it doesn't. It closes at 6 on
Saturday. 5.

6?

5. I don't know, because that's where I
get my baseball cards, honey.

Oh, honey, they're closed.

Yeah, Pearl was right. They're closed at
5.

We're closed.

You must have missed the sign.

Well, the hospital's not closed, and
those children need toys.

All right, but just keep the racket
down, okay?

See? Everybody likes kids.

Come on, hurry up.

Hurry up.

Say, we really appreciate this. Just
make it fast, okay? Come on.

Excuse me.

What would you recommend for sick
children?

Just tell them to eat all their veggies
and get a lot of rest, all right?

Funny, very funny.

You don't have time for funny, lady.
Just shop, okay?

What's his problem?

He probably wants to get home.

Oh, excuse me.

Listen,

are the eyes on this teddy bear secure?

Look, I don't know, lady. I haven't
played with teddy bears since I was, you

know, 30 or something.

Now, could you tell me what the price...

Listen, I'll tell you, if you're out of
here in three minutes, you can have

whatever you can take here for free.

Free, really?

Yeah, I'm a sucker for kids. Oh, you're
a... Yeah, just, uh, just, uh, make it

fast. Three minutes, all right? Huh?

Okay, honey, start grabbing. And you
wanted to give up at the door.

Say, uh, what happened to your wall?

Oh, uh...

That wall there?

Yeah. Yeah, it's, you know, a little
repair work. We had a water leak.

Ooh, you better get it fixed before
somebody thinks you're trying to break

the store next door.

You know, I really didn't want to do
this, lady, but... We've taken up too

much of your time. No, no, no.

You'll have to get back.

He's a burglar.

I ain't a burglar, lady. I'm a robber.

What's the difference?

About ten years.

Whoa. You, uh, you expecting somebody?

Uh, yeah. My cousin, the police chief.

Oh.

Don't mess with me, lady. I mean it.
Don't. All right?

Can't anybody read signs anymore?

I'll listen. Whoa!

Boy, toy stores just knock me out.

This is Pee Wee Herman.

Great. Who we need is Sylvester
Stallone.

Pee Wee, what are you doing in
Washington?

Oh, hi. I'm doing a show here tonight.
All my props got lost at the airport.

What I need the most is a ray gun.

Excuse me, could I have my gun back,
please?

No, no, no, no, no. Give me the gun,
give me it. Come on, come on, come on.

He said, please.

No, wait, wait.

That's a real gun. He's a robber.

He doesn't look like a bad guy. Yeah,
well, I can look a whole lot badder, you

know. Does your mother know you're doing
this?

Who are you, Oprah Winfrey or something?

All right, come on, everybody in the
storeroom, quick.

I love your show, Miss Winfrey.

I mean, I'm going to be late for my
show. Everyone's going to be mad at me.

Don't worry. I'll write you a tardy
note.

Would you?

Oh, honey, what are we going to do?

Just be calm.

I know.

Hey, there's three of us.

Why don't we overpower him?

Now, Mary, it'd be my pleasure to kick
that guy's butt, but let's face it, he's

got a gun.

We sure picked a dumb time to not be
invisible.

Oh, honey, I don't want to be here.

Me either.

I love you, honey.

I love you, too.

Oh.

Sandra. What about Sandra? She's coming
back here to meet us to get a ride home.

That's right.

She'll come back here, see the place is
closed, see our car, wonder where we

are, get suspicious, and call the
police. Yeah.

You expect Sandra to think of all of
that?

Forget it.

Besides, even if she did call the
police, if they're cute, she'd just take

dancing.

Well, don't sell her short. You might be
able to make your show yet.

Boy, I hope so. I've never been late in
my life.

That's why I wear a watch.

It's full of water.

Yeah, it's waterproof. I wear it in the
shower, and so far, not a single drop

has leaked out.

Take my day.

The man is armed and dangerous. Freeze.

Sandra, I'm high.

This gentleman was kind enough to tell
me where you were. I thought he was

trying to lure me.

I won't let him harm one single strand
of your great big hair.

Look, I just want you to all shut up and
just keep this noise down, all right?

Noise! That's what we need! We need more
noise!

He's got a gun!

A gun? Where? I don't see a gun.

Right here. Oh, I see it.

Hey, hey, hey, hey! Ho, ho, ho!

I trust this little concert is over,
huh?

I mean, what does peewee stand for
anyway?

Brain size?

I'm rubber, you're glue, whatever you
say bounces off me and sticks to you.

You tell him, peewee.

Look, you, you, you, you person, you can
lock us up and threaten us till the

cows come home, but you'll never be able
to break our spirit.

You and your big mouth.

fantasize about things like this, but I
was always tired to cool in the game.

Ow! Mary pinched me.

Well, you two grew up. We got a serious
situation here.

Hey, listen.

I don't hear anything.

Me neither. I think that robber's gone.

You know, I think you're right.

He is right.

Now we can, we can, we can rot in here.
That's what we can do.

Come on, boy.

Miss Jenkins, remember, a smile is just
a frown turned upside down.

Oh, great.

He's doing fortune cookies and I'm
standing here looking like Kunta Kinte.

Come on, everyone.

The right attitude is important.

Sometimes they act really silly.

Oh, honey.

I just had a terrible thought.

Rose and Pearl went to Virginia and
Brenda's at a slumber party.

I'm afraid not, PBC.

I don't date in the middle of a holdup,
you know?

Well, I want you to know I respect you
for that.

Only get out of these darn ropes.

Don't worry, Sandra.

I'll get us loose.

I wish my pet goat was here. It could
chew through anything.

He ain't my Toyota.

Even if we got loose, we couldn't get
out.

The door's bolted from the other side.

Hey, look.

What? Behind those boxes over there,
isn't that a back door?

You're right.

Wait a minute.

I... I think I'm... I'm loose.

I tied through my knots.

All right, TV.

How'd you do that?

Oh, I was in the Beaver Scouts for three
years. Guys used to tie me up all the

time.

Patience, Gunter.

These chains are a real bummer, Mr.
Jenkins.

Yeah, tell me about it.

I wish I could help, but I wasted my
wish on the first star tonight.

What did you wish for?

I wished I would meet a beautiful woman.

And I did.

Oh, that's so sweet.

Mary, getting shot is sounding better
and better all the time.

Would you two cut the chit -chat? What
we need is a way out of here.

Wait a minute. I got an idea.

What is it?

No, probably won't work. What?

No, I don't think it'll work. What is
it? We'll try anything. No.

What is it?

All right, I saw this in the movie once.

There's no place like home.

There's no place like home.

Why don't you huff and puff and blow the
house down?

It just slipped out. I'm sorry.

Can we see if you can find something?
I'm helpless here. It's all up to you.

I won't fail you, Captain Kirk.

Okay, Captain Kirk.

Come on. Beam us out of here.

Hey, the ceiling's got a fire system.

So?

A flame would ignite the sprinkler
system and an alarm.

Help could be here in a minute.

Yeah.

Sondra, you got a match?

I don't smoke.

I sizzle.

I'll get a drizzle for your sizzle.

Mary, check my back pocket. I think I
got some.

Yeah.

Oh, there's only one match.

Then make it count.

Aye, aye, Captain Kirk.

Grew our chance to get some help.

I did? I'm sorry.

Sometimes sorry isn't enough.

All right, here's a dollar.

Now, look, I got another plan. You might
have a chance to redeem yourself.

Name it, Mr. Jenkins. I'm your man.

Mary, do you think you can get that
grate off of that vent?

Sure.

Now, unless I miss my guess, that air
vent leads to ducks all over this

center. Now, I want you to get up in
there, crawl along till you see

and maybe you can get into a store and
get to a phone.

Oh, Lester, you're so smart.

Then why am I chained here to this post?

You want me to climb in there?

No way, Jose.

Why not?

Because it's creepy and scary in there.

Come on, Peewee, there's nothing to be
afraid of. Are you kidding?

There might be giant lint balls in
there. What if I crush the spider?

Peewee, I think you should know that
Sondra is counting on you. Oh, she's

Peewee. You could be my great big knight
in shining armor.

Okay, I'll do it.

For you, Sondra, I'd crush a billion
spiders.

You said romance was dead.

I'm doing fine.

knows how to dial.

I'm going to give him a great big hug
and a kiss. Well, maybe just a hug. I

don't want to push him past the limit,
you know?

We're free!

It worked!

For a minute.

I never would have spotted him if he
hadn't asked me for change for the

I'm sure you can imagine my
embarrassment.

All right, if anybody tries this again,
well, I wouldn't. I'm okay.

You know, I think I have a way to get
past the burglar.

I use my feminine wives.

Oh, Lord.

No, Mary, when he's distracted, you can
run out and scream for help.

I'll get shot.

Well, I haven't worked out all the bugs
yet.

You know, Sondra, you may have something
there.

Lester! Once Sondra gets going, there's
not a man on this earth that can resist

her. Oh?

Except for me, I mean, because you're
the woman that my life is.

Proceed. Okay, here's the plan. Sandra,
you maneuver him over here past me.

I'll kick the gun out of his hand.

I think I got just enough leeway to get
him in the headlight.

Mary, you grab the gun, but don't get
near him. And Pee -wee. Yeah.

Stay out of the way.

Let's do it.

A hunt for freedom.

What, um, what'd you have in mind?

Well, what say you and me blow this pop
stand together?

Huh?

I could be your mall.

You know, these guys were trained to
pick out the finest in jewelry, precious

gems, furs.

Go ahead, look at them eyes. Look, go
ahead.

You know, how about it? We'd be the best
combos as Bonnie and Clyde. Not the

real ones. They was ugly, you know.

Warren Beatty, you know, you look like
him a little bit.

If they done away, I look like him.

Like I just got off the turnip truck or
what?

All right, now I've had it. No more
playing games.

Oh, Mary, come on, do something.

Look,

we're expected at the Regency room in 20
minutes. And if we're not there, the

whole world is going to be looking for
us. We're very important people. Oh,

yeah? Who are you?

I'm Gladys Knight, and these are my
pips.

no rescue party for this, I'll tell you
that.

Yo!

Punk!

Cute, huh? Real cute.

Pete, when will you stop? Then you're
gonna get yourself killed!

Okay, nerd.

Just keep it up, you know. Just keep it
up. Now my secret weapon.

This is probably one of the most
interesting heists that I've...

That $2 ,000 reward is going to buy a
lot of toys for the kids in the

Yeah. And you know what would really be
great? If you could go and visit the

kids. Yeah. Hey, why not?

Hey, that would be great. They'd love
it.

You know, PB, you are really so sweet.

I know you are, but what am I?

Hey, Sondra, now that we're so close,
how about having dinner with me tonight?

I'll take you to the Petit Chateau.

Well, do we have to eat children's
portion?

Mm -hmm.

Then, a moonlit ride along the Potomac.

Just you, me, and my silver shadow.

Oh, I'll go get changed.

You know, I've always wanted to know a
man who owns a silver shadow.

Y 'all want to see it? Yeah.

Come on, it's right outside.

What's a silver shadow?

Oh, it's the top of the line Rolls
Royce.

wait to see you riding up on these
handlebars.