Original subtitles

I got no telephone.

Hello. Stop it! And that's Simon and Lee.

Hello. Look, could we come in for a minute?

Yes, of course.

Hey, boys, come on.

Oh, come on,

Harry.

I can't, I can't. I can't possibly.

Well, I can.

I've got this piggish job to do.

You'll have to do it.

No, I'm sorry. It's just not my sort of thing.

The whole case.

All on your own.

Good clients.

Good money.

All details arranged and advanced by me.

Yeah, it's the details I don't like.

Do you know how many detective agencies there are in Nottingham?

No. Twenty.

And Mr and Mrs Mills have chosen us.

We don't want to let them down, do we? We don't want them going off to our

rival.

Look, Ken, I'd rather help you with your dictates.

Security systems, things like that. I can handle. I'm fine.

And when you do the nursing, I'll finish it. Nearly, Harry.

The mills have got a really good place there.

That's ruining it for them.

I can't go back there because they've seen me.

You can handle it.

Undercover operations.

Look, I'm not saying yes or anything, but, well, you know, I'll fill you in

a few more details.

Mum, tell him. Me.

It's only for a couple of days, that's all.

Till we get the injunction.

Well, they can all go in together.

The boys don't need a separate room or anything.

Well, room ten's not booked.

Great.

I knew you'd say yes.

Well, I don't know what Harry will say, though.

Well, Harry mustn't know.

What do you mean?

This is the perfect hiding place for her, so long as no one gossips.

Well, Harry wouldn't gossip.

Peter is dangerous.

Oh, very respectable in public.

What he does to his wife in private is another matter.

I'm going to go and break the good news for Judy.

Thanks, Helen.

Chris, do you think Judy would welcome some help with the king?

Or anything to take the pressure off.

Good.

Whoa. Have I got the job for you?

You're a businessman under stress.

Under stress. And the doctors ordered you into the home for a complete rest.

Complete rest. To avoid a nervous breakdown.

Right. And your symptoms are headaches, sleeplessness, pains in the chest, lack

of concentration, and colitis.

And I'm supposed to act that little lot, am I? You don't have to act it. That's

the beauty of it. You look it. Oh, thanks a bomb, mate.

What's colitis, anyway?

Laura found it in a medical encyclopedia.

OK, now, can I pretend to have something if I don't know what it is?

Nervous colon.

Oh, come on, that's... Look, you get a nice little room of your own.

Bathroom, telly, pretty nurses.

When's it all going to be? This afternoon.

The mills will fix it.

This afternoon?

This afternoon.

Can you get engineering, please, mate? I'll see you at the office, Harry, after

lunch. This afternoon?

Yeah.

You had enough yet?

Are you sure you don't want to go and see your mother?

Your fault, Mrs. Hilden.

On jobs is what I agreed to.

And clean the rubbish, weed in the drive, that kind of thing. Well, I never

I was going to look after any kids. Oh, good morning, Mr. and Mrs. Phillips. Did

you have a good game? Yes, fine. Oh, good.

I told you, their mother's been ill.

Well, I'm going to be here at this rate.

Mrs. Shelley is a guest at this hotel.

And if she wants someone to keep an eye on her boys for her, then that's what

we'll do.

Right?

Is that the Emsworth Nursing Home?

Can I speak to Matron, please?

Oh, hello.

This is Mr Crawford's private... What did Helen say when you told her?

She said I was tired.

Well, I'll keep an iron wood coat for you while you're away.

Harry, that's it.

Garden pools.

Plastic ones, funny shapes.

Sorry?

I knew it was bloke once.

He made plastic pools.

The bottom dropped out of the market and he had a nervous breakdown.

I could base myself on him, I suppose, wouldn't I?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, whatever you like, Harry.

As long as it holds water.

Oh, yeah. Oh, come on, the lists.

There's a list of the staff, a list of the long -term patients, and a list of

the thefts with the date and the amount taken.

Yeah, it's usually about 15 or 20 quid from each patient's room.

Been going on for two or three years, so watch everybody, Ari.

See what you can find out.

Remember, motive and opportunity.

Motive and opportunity.

Hello, Mary.

Does this look all right for our new patient?

Male or female?

Male.

Goodie.

Snap! No.

Yes? Look, they're two of the same cord. I don't care if they're the same cord.

It can't play properly.

Stop!

I got it.

I got it!

Come on, Helen.

Anything you want. I know.

Julie, for goodness sake.

If you can't do the better of guns... What's this on your hands? Judy, Judy,

Judy!

We're quite used to children here. Now, don't worry about it. Come on, boys,

let's pick up these cars.

And the pen. Put the tray back on.

Ken, is there anything, anything in the office I can do?

Rocky, why don't you show the boys in Staten? They've loved it.

I don't know how boring it is.

We've got a job to do here.

Please.

Ready, Mr Crawford? What?

It's night.

What? Come along, complete bed rest. That's what Matron says, and that

mean working.

Leave up, Mr Crawford.

Look at you.

Notebook, papers, goodness knows what.

You're supposed to be forgetting all about that, aren't you, Mr Crawford?

Now, then.

What is your line of work, Mr Crawford?

Fools.

A garden pool.

Lovely.

You know, plastic ones. It's a funny thing.

Hmm. What? I think we'd better do that again when you've calmed down a bit.

He's okay.

Hello, Annette.

They're all right. I've told Rocky he mustn't let them out of his sight.

Judy?

Judy?

I've just been to see the solicitor.

The hearing's fixed for Monday.

Monday morning.

He's hopeful.

Three days, love.

Try to hold on.

Hold on.

Are you comfy, Mr Crawford?

Yeah, yes, child.

Good. Now take these.

Something to make you relaxed.

Complete rest for the first 24 hours. That's what we insist on with our stress

patients.

Mr Crawford, relax.

Oh, Andy, you've got all these symptoms. Just look at you.

Come on, Mr Crawford.

Oh.

Follow it.

Well? Mr Crawford.

I can't.

Take some more water, then.

Oh, my God.

Oh, that wasn't so terrible, was it?

I swallowed it.

Good. That's what you're supposed to do. Yes, but what are they? What are they

going to do to me? Make you feel relaxed and sleepy. So just lie down and enjoy

it. No, I can't. Gently. I can't, possibly.

Anything you want, just press the bell and know.

All right, Lee, now that's enough. Now come down now. I can't get down.

What? I'm scared.

Oh, no.

No, you're not.

Now, just calm down and... He is. He's afraid of heights.

Well, why did he get up there in the first place, then? Help! I'm going to

Help! All right! All right!

I'll try and get something. Yes, yes, yes.

It's all right now, calm down.

I'll get you down in a second.

Quick! Right.

You thick clot!

Thanks, lad. You fell for it, Rocky! Thanks a bunch.

You must be honey.

That's right.

How long have you been working here?

A couple of years.

And do you like it?

Good morning.

Good morning.

You shouldn't be out of bed till Maitland says.

Come on.

I thought you were going to fight in town.

Yes, that's right.

Lucky.

Oh, I share it with two girlfriends.

And my daughter, of course.

Daughter? Baby daughter.

What's a ha -ha -ha supposed to mean?

Good.

Now, you stay there this time.

Yes, ma 'am.

Item

one.

Annie. Cleaner. Two years in the job.

Evasive. Non -communicative.

Reluctant when questioned.

Has motive.

Possible hostility to matron.

Question mark.

She roams freely.

Oh, yes. Has she? Oh, good.

Can I sit down?

I had to hide because they don't like me wandering.

How old do you think I am?

Oh, 91 tomorrow.

And I'm off to buy the hat.

And I've always had a new hat for my birthday.

It's a family ritual.

Lunch at Hambleton Hall, a car to take me there, and a new hat.

Mummy's birthday treat.

And you know, he still calls me Mummy.

even though he's nearly 70.

He can read his old mother like a book.

We're very close.

His champagne and caviar girl, he calls me.

I must have style. I must have fun.

And believe you me...

There isn't much of either in this place.

What about you, Harold?

Well, I'm... You look like a fun lover.

What do you do?

For a living.

All my garden pools.

Oh.

Fascinating.

Let me show you my photographs.

Excuse me.

Can you tell me where the guest car park is, please? Yeah, it's up there and

round to the right.

Great.

Um,

John, just hang on to that lot for me, will you? I won't be a minute, all

Never even had a joint account, all I've got.

Don't worry about it.

I can't pay you for them. Chris is one of my oldest friends. Lee!

I wouldn't do that, dear.

I'm happy to help.

I hardly slept a wink last night, going worrying and worrying round and round.

The house, the money, Peter.

The boys.

How will this affect the boys, I wonder?

Lee!

I think they'll be fine.

What's that bastard up to?

Peter.

How will he manage?

Once you've got the injunction on Monday, you'll feel a lot better.

You'll know where you stand. You'll be able to start again.

I don't know if I can.

I've never had... Helen, sorry. Can I have a word?

Excuse me.

There's a man in a car. He's been watching the hotel.

What? He's driving up the driveway. He was here yesterday.

The drive? Where? In a blue BMW.

He's got binoculars. He's parking in a visitor's car park.

What sort of a man? I don't know. About 40.

Come and show me.

Judith, I've just got to go back to the house.

I mean, suppose it's Kate in the joint.

You know, a burglar.

Look there.

That's him, is it? The same man you saw yesterday?

Yeah. Shall I phone Ken? No.

No, I can manage.

You go and keep an eye on Lee and Simon and Judy.

But what if he's a bloke? Rocky, can you just go?

And don't say anything. Keep this to yourself.

All right?

Yeah.

Yes, can I help you?

Yes, I've booked a room for tonight. My name's Patterson.

Mr. Patterson?

Yeah, that's right.

Yes,

room two.

Right.

If you care to register, I'll get someone to take your bag up. Thank you.

Laura, can you find Ken?

I need help, urgently.

Mr Crawford, your daughter. Hello, Daddy. How are you?

So like you. The same eyes.

Everybody says that, don't they, Daddy?

Gorgeous to see you.

Oh, a real daddy's girl.

What are you playing at?

What do you mean, Daddy?

I'm filling out your character for you.

I thought that I could be your problem daughter.

You know, utterly spoiled and you're always giving me money.

Oh, come on, Harry. Let me help you with the case.

Get off, Laura.

What's going to you?

I thought I could chat with the patients and find things out.

Oh, you know how mean Ken is. He never lets me in on hardly anything.

Yoo -hoo!

See my new hat?

Mary Fraser, Mrs.

90, 91 tomorrow, fully provided for by son Anthony.

Bags of opportunity, but absolutely no motive, besides which she's nuts.

Can I... What?

Help you? No.

I've just been out and bought it.

What do you think?

Oh, it's lovely. Hold on.

There. Young lady, come and see the rest of my outfit.

Come along.

You can spare a minute, can't you, Harold?

Easily. Back in a minute, Dad.

Who is she really, you naughty man?

Ken, I've got to betray a confidence.

I'm sheltering someone.

What? A battered wife.

A what?

Mrs Shelley and her two boys. I mean, I didn't know her. Chris just appeared

with her.

Chris? Chris is my oldest friend. She brought her here yesterday, asking me if

I'd put her up.

Hide her from our husband, Dr Peter Shelley.

The doctor?

Does Larry know about this? Well, no one does.

You see, I had to promise not to tell anyone because if Peter found her, he

could kill her.

Ken, I think he has.

What, killed her? No, no, no.

Found her.

Traced her. That's why I had to call you.

He's here in the hotel. He's booked in as a guest.

I'm scared stiff of what he might do.

Well, where's Mrs Shelley?

She's up in her room. I haven't told her.

And the boys are watching telly up with Rocky.

And he's already booked in? Yes, but under a false name, as in Mr Patterson.

Well, I don't understand it. Why book in at all? Why not just go up and see her?

Well, I don't know.

You sure you got the right bloke?

Well, Rocky saw him today and yesterday spying on the hotel.

I'm sure it's him.

Oh, that's him.

Ken, I don't want any trouble. I just want you to get him out of here.

Looking for something?

No. Not really.

Lovely bags.

Yeah. Yeah.

Mr. Patterson.

That's right.

Can I have a word with you, please?

Well? Well, we think you've checked in the hotel under a false name, and I'm

afraid we can't accept guests who are travelling under false identity.

I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave.

Sorry.

I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name.

Boone, Ken Boone. I'm in charge of security. Yeah.

Oh, and, um... Yeah, OK.

Someone somewhere's got their wire to be crossed.

Mr Boone.

Yeah.

Lunch at Campbellton Hall.

A hat that cost £30.

Laura. So where's she getting the money from for tomorrow's little outing? I

told you. And she's going in a chauffeur -driven car. Because her son Anthony

pays for it all, I told you.

She never mentioned a son.

Oh, excuse me. She never stops mentioning her son.

I'd personally have seen about 400 photographs of her son.

Laura, you're giving me brain damage.

Haven't you got an office to run?

Look, I'm only trying to help.

Mrs Fraser's son, Anthony, lives in New Zealand and every year he sends her

money for a birthday treat.

Oh.

So back to the drawing board, Laura.

You see, it's not that easy being a detective.

It's no good suspecting the first person you come across.

You've got to use your grey matter.

What are you doing?

I'm meditating.

Like Sherlock Holmes.

All right?

Draw the curtains on your way out, please, will you?

Right. What?

Altering your neck. Eh?

You make me look a right... Burke, didn't you? Me? Yes, you, Rocky, playing

detective. The man in your precious blue car was not Mr. Shelley.

Mr. Shelley? No, he's an innocent guest staying at the hotel called Patterson.

Well, I never said... Who's Mr. Shelley?

Well, he's not Mr.

Patterson, is he? Now, Ken, you seem to be in a bit of a muddle. I'm in a bit of

a muddle? Yeah, you see, yesterday I was on the stable roof rescuing Lee, only

it turned out that I didn't need to rescue him and I saw the... Rocky, just

forget it, okay?

You want to be useful, take that over to Harry.

Now, today... He was convinced I'd registered under a false name.

He must be in the know.

Oh, yes, definitely.

Look, after what I saw yesterday, they've got to be here.

Boone.

Ken Boone.

I told Mrs Yeldon, she tells Ken, Ken gets it all wrong and I'll get a

rollicking. Excuse me.

I've got a good eye, you see.

I notice things. I could help. I could help a lot.

Well, of course, Laura's his favourite.

Thank you.

Oh, is this your son?

Just like his sister.

Now, don't stay too long.

Rest and relaxation, Mr Crawford, hour and hour.

Sis, don't ask.

Come here. Look at this.

There.

Can you mark where he is?

The corner's probably down and there's a little cross. Oh, yeah.

Don't go in with that thing on, OK?

Please, go back in here.

Like that.

What a massive trap, is it? Yep.

Here you are, Mr Crawford.

Supper time.

Oh, lovely.

Thank you.

Oh, very nice.

Oh, well, how's the, you know, actually going?

Cheers, Rocky.

Sorry?

I'm not allowed to have guests in here while I'm eating.

Oh.

Thanks for coming, anyway.

Well, goodnight, then.

Dad? Goodnight, son.

My name's Shelley.

Dr. Shelley.

Dr. Shelley?

Yes, and I need to talk.

I'll be right down.

Yes?

Dr. Shelley's downstairs.

What? Don't worry.

I'll take him outside.

It doesn't matter how I know.

My wife is somewhere in that hotel.

She was.

She left this afternoon.

You're lying.

She left this afternoon. That's all I know. I'm sorry.

Mr. Glenn, I've got to find her.

For her own sake.

Look, let me get this straight.

You're the one she's running away from.

You're her husband.

You're the one who's his.

So that's what you're saying, is it? That I knock her about?

Yeah, she is.

These figures.

Sorry, you'll appreciate it in the circumstances. I didn't want to tell you

this, Mr. Boone, but I suppose I'll have to.

My wife is mentally ill.

Seriously ill.

She lives in a complete fantasy world.

She's done all this before, run away, taken the boys.

Only this time she's very ill.

I'm terrified of what she might feel.

I'm scared for her and... I'm scared for my boys.

Yeah, well, I'm fine, but I mean, she claims that... Have you ever had to deal

with someone who's mentally ill?

Yeah. As a matter of fact, I have.

Mr. Boone, I love her.

She's my wife.

It's a terrible thing.

It's tearing our family apart.

I don't want to see her packed off to a mental home. I just want to try to find

her.

Now, if I could just get her home and get her on the right kind of medication.

You didn't talk with him.

He seems a nice guy.

And what if we've got it wrong, eh?

Perhaps she is mentally ill.

Well, I'm sure she's not.

All he wants to do is to try and get her home. He's worried about his kids.

Can't I just go up there?

See if she'll talk to him.

Leave it to the morning, Ken.

You're not even supposed to know she's here.

My assignment was to locate the million parties in Mr. Shelley, which I've now

done.

Getting them back wasn't part of the deal.

All right, Mr. Patterson, all right.

How much?

Oh, it's not a question of money.

It's my caseload.

Look, I can't manage them on my own, can I?

There are two of them.

I don't want to have to involve the police.

For the kids' sake.

An extra day in the case requiring a rearrangement of my schedules.

If I can just get the boys back.

She'll follow.

I know she will.

I'll have to charge double rates, I'm afraid.

Tomorrow?

Tomorrow morning.

Hello, um, to the nursing home... Hello, love, yeah, can I speak to, uh, Mr

Crawford, Harry Crawford?

Oh, yeah. What happened, Chuck?

Hmm? You were asleep.

Huh?

Oh, it's you.

No, I certainly wasn't asleep. Well, I was out on a recce.

Hold on. Come in.

I'll carry on, then.

So, how's it going?

Have you got anywhere yet?

We got any suspects?

What?

I can't hear you.

Walls have ears.

Look,

how are things at your end, anyway?

Harry, you there?

Harry!

Ken. Ken.

The money's gone.

It's a birthday party

Oh, no.

Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday,

dear Mary.

Happy birthday to you.

Oh, she's a jolly good fellow.

Oh, she's a jolly good fellow. Oh, she's a jolly good fellow.

And so say all of us. And so say all of us. And so say all of us.

Is this really?

Okay.

You two boys carry on here. I've just remembered something.

I'm not ill.

I haven't got a son or a daughter.

I'm not even a manufacturer of garden pools.

Thank God.

I'm a fraud.

I see.

So what are you here for?

Boone Investigations.

Boone Investigations?

Private detectives.

We were hired by Mr and Mrs Mills to look into the thefts that you've been

having here.

I'm sorry.

I see.

Matron, I need your advice.

See, the thing is, I think I know who the thief is. Well, I don't think, I

And that's the problem.

I knew it couldn't go on, of course.

I just hoped.

Ah.

So you know who it is, too.

I thought you probably did.

I, uh... You had me fooled from the beginning, that story about her son.

You see, well... Well, anyway, I... I set a trap for her.

And she fell straight in.

A trap?

Mark notes.

I left them in my room and they ended up in Mrs Fraser's handbag.

I checked.

But it's so sad.

I mean, she's old.

She probably doesn't realise what she's doing.

I can't shop her, mate. I need your help.

Have you said anything to her?

No, no.

Good.

Because she doesn't know anything about it.

I'm your thief, Mr Crawford.

A son was all she had.

What was the harm in it?

The rest of the patients, they wouldn't miss a few pounds.

I couldn't see it was wrong.

And it gave her so much happiness.

So? Her son died two years ago, Mr. Palford, and I never told her.

You never told her?

I meant to, of course.

But each time I came to it, I couldn't.

I knew it would kill her.

And the longer I left it, the harder it became.

So I decided not to.

There was enough money in his will to pay for her room, so that was all right.

So long as I could somehow keep his little traditions going, treats on her

birthday, treats at Christmas, Easter, her wedding anniversary, she

need never find out.

And she hasn't.

She's gone on, having her outings and her new hats.

All paid for by unsuspecting patients, eh?

You're crazy.

What if she's being pulled?

Perhaps.

Here it is.

Excuse me a minute.

You sure? Yeah, there were two of them. Mr Patterson and another bloke. Yeah,

but where? Oh, they're up on the drive.

So you've left the boys?

Yeah, well, I thought it was my... Now, where have you left them? Oh, well,

they're playing swing ball. Right, go and check them.

Hello.

What's going on?

Get in.

What are they doing with him, Ken?

Ken?

Oh,

you can't do that!

Stop him, Rocky!

Are you playing at? I'm sorry, Dr. Shelley, but those boys don't leave my

I beg your pardon? I own the place. Those boys are my guests.

Excuse me, they're my sons.

Judy.

Boys, are you all right?

There's an injunction stopping you from taking them.

Not till tomorrow, and then only maybe.

He is within his rights. Would you please move your car? No.

Oh, for God's sake, if you won't move it, then I will. Peter, don't!

Would you give me the keys, please?

Excuse me, gentlemen.

All I want is to move the car so I can get out, Mr. Boone. Yes, and I'll move

myself when you release Lee and Simon.

Release?

Please, Peter.

Look, why don't we all go back to the hotel and talk this through, eh?

I don't know who's right and who's wrong.

There's no point standing here, is there?

First thing is to get the kids out of the car.

Are you coming home?

Just try to be sensible.

Sensible? Dr Shelley, she's terrified of you. Good luck.

Mr Boone, you know the situation.

What situation?

Well, they told me about your illness.

My... What illness?

What illness? For God's sake.

Oh, mental breakdown.

What?

Find a reason with her, you won't get anywhere.

You liar!

You liar!

Judy, relax, will you? Please, darling.

I know how you feel. I know how confusing it must seem for you, but...

Trust me, pumpkin.

Please.

Look at this.

Look.

Look at this, Peter. Look what you did.

Are you saying I did this?

Is he saying I did this to myself?

But I'm mad.

Judy.

He's the one who's mad.

He's the one who's sick in the head.

I've got four broken ribs and I've got the x -rays to prove it.

You've got what?

I've got the x -rays.

I went to the doctor and he sent me to the hospital. Which doctor?

Jonathan.

I'm sorry, Peter, I had to.

Jonathan? I couldn't think of anyone else to go to.

I can't believe it.

I'm in pain.

I was frightened. I had to have medical help.

You stupid bitch.

You silly, stupid bitch. Take it easy, Shelley. You know what you've done, I

suppose. You've ruined my chances.

Oh. Yes, because once Jonathan knows, everyone knows.

Peter Shelley beats his wife. Oh, yes. Let's appoint a new senior partner who

beats his wife.

No, Peter, don't. No, that just about does it.

I haven't a hope in hell of a job now.

Have I?

Please. I might as well quit. Go home.

Is that what you'd like?

No. Steady on, Shelley.

Steady on.

I'm going to take the boys with me.

Yes. Peter, please.

the boys out of the old car.

OK, yeah. I'll call an ambulance.

Oh, what the hell was that?

Nice gratitude for you. Hurry.

I'll solve the case.

I'll come home from that nurse, you know.

I'm weary, exhausted. I've been for a bit of rest. Where you are? The leg!

Mum, are you all right?

Yes.

It's all right.

Everything will be all right.

I promise.

You said what?

You said we'd pay. It's in the leg.

You can be careful.

What happened?

The matron was pinching the money to give the dear old lady a treat.

And I told her if the theft stopped, I would pay.

You? Yes, me.

Not Boone? Not Boone Investigation? No, not Boone Investigation. It's me

personally out of my own pocket. So stop panicking.

Well, how much?

£500.

Pardon?

£500!

You'll crack it up, mate.

Oh, come on now, Ken, what was I going to do?

I was in an awkward position.

Well, get the matron thrown out and create misery all round. No, of course

Well, what are we going to tell Mr and Mrs Mills?

Well, you tell them the truth, you kipper.

The thefts are going to stop, it's guaranteed.

And that was the object of the exercise.

Have you ever thought of registering as a charity?