All language subtitles for 15Days20251080pAMZNWEB-DLDD20H264-playWEB_track4_eng[_27517]

(camera clicking)

(upbeat rock music)

Oh, excuse me.

- Fuck you.
- Language.

This is a family bar.

- Lia.
- Yeah.

I need you to translate something for me

'cause I don't speak girl.

What is it?

I'm trying to ask this girl out,

but I don't know if she's single.

So I texted her, "Are you seeing anybody?"

And she says it's complicated.
What does that mean?

It means she's seeing somebody casually.

She wants to commit, but he doesn't.

Hey Kali, I'm ready to settle up.

Alright, I'll meet you down there.

I've never seen you with glasses on.

Yeah, it's just for up close.

Let me see.

Yeah, you got that naughty
librarian look going on.

- We're not gonna talk about
your browser history, Joe.

Okay, let's not. All right.

Okay. You're all square.

- Have a good night.
- You too.

I'll see you later.

Okay, see you next time.

- Are you serious? I
thought you weren't hungry.

I'm not hungry. I'm snacky.

- If you were hungry, I
would've bought you something.

[Lia] What's wrong?

This dickhole left his tab open again.

Ah.

Is dickhole one word or two?

One.

Holy shit.

Look at this. Blue hair.

No, that's a bad sign.

Cat.

How many cats do you
count in that picture?

- I count two pictures of
cats with three real cats,

Right.

That's that's, thats what I'm I, I...

I don't even know.

- I see bulges where
there shouldn't be bulges.

- This one's got so much
hardware on her face,

looks like she fell
asleep in a tackle box.

- She could not get around
any fucking magnets, dude.

It would rip her shit out.

No.

Hey Jocelyn, is it fixed?

We have beer.

Hey Eric, we need to talk.

- I feel like I'm being
attacked here. What's going on?

- So, it's Wiener Wednesday,
it's ladies night,

and it's also hump day.

Don't you think we're
sending a mixed message here?

I think it's a great message.

The wieners aren't selling.

Sorry, but nobody wants your wiener.

You gotta pick one to get rid of.

- Alright, we'll get
rid of Wiener Wednesday.

I'm the captain here. I'll right the ship.

Hold on. This was my idea.

Look at me. Look at me.

I'm the captain now.

Get back to work.

♪ Town that I know ♪

♪ No way to leave ♪

♪ Nowhere to go ♪

♪ Stuck in a rut ♪

♪ Of vice and woe ♪

♪ Study my steps, go with the flow ♪

Hey, leaving already?

- Yeah, I gotta, I gotta
get some stuff done.

Oh, does one of those things involve

giving that guy back his phone?

- Make sure you take
this with you next time.

Thinking of a number between one and 100.

Can you guess what that number is?

86?

- Hey, you're not as dumb
as you look. Let's go.

(soulful music)

Wow, I can't believe that happened.

Damn, where'd you learn how to do that?

Well, when the girls came in,

my dad said I was gonna need
to learn how to fight, so.

- Badass.
- Thank you.

- Dude.
- Right?

- [Lia] Good job.
- Thank you.

That was pretty awesome, right?

Right?

- Oh.
- Ow!

- Nipple ring, bitch.
- Forgot you just got that.

- It's all good.
- [Lia] Sorry.

What are you looking at?

Hey, how's it going?

Not too bad. How you doing?

I'm doing pretty good.

Isn't that the same shirt
you destroyed with motor oil?

Oh no. That one's gone.

I already tossed it.

I actually found the exact
same shirt over there

at the Goodwill for like $5.

So it works out. It smells
kind of funky, but it works.

You didn't wash it before you put it on?

Well, no.

Don't they wash it like while it's there,

before they put it on the racks?

No?

- No.
- That, that's kinda bad.

Now I feel like
retroactively dirty, but...

I'm sorry, dude.

I dunno why it's not working.

Uh oh. It's Skynet.

What?

- The machines are becoming
self-aware. Skynet?

No.

I'll be back. Terminator, come on.

I don't know what you're talking about.

Oh my gosh.

We'll go and get you at the other one.

Alright.

Hey.

Hey. Do you need me?

- No, you're good.
- Okay.

I'm starving. I haven't eaten all day.

Keep eating. I just need some straws.

(soulful music continues)

(upbeat dreamy music)

(shirt rips)

(buttons pelting)

Kali. Kali.

Hey, daydreaming again, aren't we?

No.

(sighs) Yes.

- I just saw Kali fantasizing
about one of our customers.

- Oh really?
- Yeah.

I do that too.

- Mine are a little different.
- Waitress. Another beer.

(glass shatters)

- Snap at me again,
motherfucker. Snap again.

Oh, wow.

- Like I said, mine
are a little different.

(dramatic music)

I'm taking off. Do you need anything?

Okay.

It's good to see you.
You have a good night.

You too.

I'm taking off.

- Alright.
- Have a good night.

You too.

Good game.

Dang. (chuckles)

(rock music)

Ladd, we're closing up. It's time to go.

Already?

Where'd my friends go?

They went home.

That makes sense. (sighs)

I need to get home.

Yep.

- Can you give me a ride
please? It's on your way.

Okay. Go to the bathroom.

Leave me back here in five
minutes and I'll take you home.

Yes. Yes.

Wonderful.

(bugs chirping)

(door thuds)

Do you think maybe, possibly
we could like maybe go burger?

Yeah, we can burger.

Yeah.

[Cashier] Here you go.

Thanks. Have a good night.

Damn, Mr. T. That is a big ass burger.

I haven't eaten anything all day.

You better be careful.

You're gonna end up with a gut like me.

Nah, I'll never get that fat.

- Oh, oh.
- Oh.

(both laughing)

- (sighs) Oh my God.
I'm so sorry I'm late.

Your my had to take Ladd for a burger.

My patience is almost gone.

- Well, thanks for not
starting without me.

I'm gonna press play.

Wait, wait, I gotta get changed.

How many episodes do we have left?

Next week is the season finale.

- Already?
- Yep.

And this is the episode

where they consummate their relationship.

- Wow. You just overly
romanticized them having sex.

But they deserve it.

Yeah, they do.

(dramatic music)

- There he is.
- Oh. Yup.

Oh. And there goes the
shirt and the pants.

That's a penis. (chuckles)

I did not think they
would show that full on.

- Did you see that
grandfather clock swinging?

(both laughing)

Oh, my god.

Hey, don't hit me with your
arm dick. Stop. (laughing)

Stop.

- We're announcing new
guidelines for every American

to follow over the next 15 days.

- Our 15 days to stop
the spread initiative.

We're gonna close the bars,

we're gonna close the restaurants,

Bars, and restaurants will be closed

to the public starting at the
close of business tomorrow.

- The two-week freeze
includes limiting restaurants

to takeout only.

- Advise no gatherings
of more than 10 people

for the next 15 days,

- As well as venues
that host either indoor

or outdoor events.

(energetic rock music)

Girls, I got some bad news.

What is it?

- Due to this coronavirus
that's going around,

they're shutting the entire country down.

They wanna shut us down for 15 days.

- What the hell? What
are we supposed to do?

- I don't know right now.
Can't even do dine-in at all.

All we can do is take out deliveries.

Where does that leave us?

- You have two weeks
off. You can enjoy it.

Do some side jobs.

If you can file for
unemployment if you want.

Believe me, this is the last thing I want.

I mean, I can't afford to lose you guys.

You guys can hang in there?

- I guess. I mean, it's
just 15 days, right?

- That's awesome. I
mean, it is just 15 days.

I mean, hopefully it's
just a bump in the road.

So two weeks off.

Two whole weeks.

What to do?

(energetic music)

- How are you doing that?
- Doing what?

Finding me so quickly and killing me.

I just figure where you'd be.

I go there and I shoot your ass.

Okay. You're spawn killing me.

No, I'm not.

You just don't know the map good enough.

I know the map perfectly fine.

You're just always right on my ass.

Boom. Got you, bitch.

How are you doing that?

I'm just that good.

(doorbell rings)

Ooh, the pizza is here.

(energetic rock music)

- Shit. I just deleted
Jocelyn's number off my phone.

You don't remember it?

- No. I have a smart phone
to remember things for me.

It's 555-420-6969. Come on.

Oh yeah.

(energetic rock music)

(calm music)

You ready for that downward dog?

Yep.

All right.

Oh my back. Oh. (grunting)

How bad is this one? Medium bad.

Okay.

Okay. I'm up.

Okay.

Uh huh. (bones cracking)

Good?

I think I'm done for the day. Okay.

(dramatic music)

- Ow! You hit me in the
eye, like my actual eyeball.

What the fuck? (laughing)

- I am not kidding. His dick
was as long as a CVS receipt.

- You know, I'm friends
with his sister Gisella.

Gisella?

Yeah.

Do her friends call her Gis for short?

- Oh my God. You do not wanna
let her catch you saying that.

Why?

Because then you'll have
Gis all up in your face.

No, I don't want Gis on my face.

(both laughing)

- Isn't it kind of weird
being home all the time?

- I kinda like it.
- Really?

Yeah. Like I don't have to wear a bra,

can finally let them breathe.

Like, look, I don't have that
red line under them anymore.

Dude. Put your boobs away.

You are so drunk.

I'm not that drunk.

- Yeah, you are. You're
like lesbian drunk.

- Oh, really?
- Yeah.

If I were to let you kiss me,

you would like it.

Hi, tequila. Can I talk to Lia now?

(both laughing)

(Lia retching)

- I'm sorry.
- It's okay.

Get it all out.

Thank you for taking care of me.

Of course.

I'm sorry if I was lesbian with you.

It's fine. No apologies needed.

Wouldn't have happened if you were ugly.

(Kali chuckles)

(Lia retching)

(energetic music)

(plastic clapping)

(both grunting)

Die, you filthy whore!

Wait. What?

- Just go with it.
- Okay.

[Both] Ah!

Ah!

For the act of incest, I
will remove your sinful womb.

Dude. Gross.

Sorry. You're dead.

Ow. That's my nipple ring, bitch.

Ow, my ass. That hurts.

Good. You deserved it.

- Oh really?
- Yeah.

(dramatic music)

(leaves crunching)

(Kali crunching)

(Kali sniffs)

Hey, puff me.

(Lia crunching)

What are you doing?

I'm giving you war paint.

It's the season finale
and we must be prepared.

Who's drunk now?

Me. (laughs)

(dramatic music)

(metal clanking)

(strikes thud)

(both grunting)

Run, bitch. Run!

Torin!

(dramatic music)

Constance

Alive.

(heart thumping)

(birds calling)

(dramatic music)

Behind you!

(assailant grunting)

(ethereal music)

(assailant grunting)

(strike thuds)

(intense music)

I can't believe they just did that.

They, they can't.

They can't kill him off.

He's a main character.

He was..

Hello?

- Yeah. We just finished.
- We just watched it.

Yeah I can't believe they did this.

That's no way to end a season.

- I don't understand.
- How could they kill him off?

- He's a main character.
- His character had

- so much more to do.
- And her, too?

- They didn't care.
- Like, come on.

- What even was that?
- They didn't wanna finish

his story and they just let him die.

People can't come back from death.

- What was that?
- I don't,

it doesn't make sense.

Holy shit.

Hey, you want some breakfast?

- No.
- [Lia] Hey, more for me.

Hey Eric, what's going on?

- Oh, it's un-fucking-believable.

The government extended the lockdown again

to all non-essential
businesses, bars, restaurants,

fricking movie theaters.

We're all still shut down.

- So we can't open?
- Not even close.

The OFCC, they're gonna
fine me or they're gonna

shut me down if I try to stay open.

Shit. What are we gonna do?

Honestly, I don't know.

I, we're just taking it
one day at a time right now

and just trying to make it through this.

- So our industry, our livelihood
is being overtly targeted

and we can't do anything about it?

This is fucking bullshit.

- Pawn shops, big box stores,
they get to stay open?

But what about the rest of us?

I don't know.

All I can say at this point is, please,

please tell me girls, you guys filed

for unemployment benefits.

How far in debt are we right now?

Well, we're two months behind rent.

The car is one missed
payment from being repoed.

Add food and utilities and
we need about five grand.

That's just to be caught up on everything.

We'll need more depending

on how soon we can get unemployment.

I've literally been calling all day

and they're busy every time.

It's like everyone's
calling at the same time

trying to get benefits set up.

How is it that you just can't file

for unemployment online?

- [Kali] Yeah.
- So stupid.

Hey, I think I found something.

- A job?
- Yeah.

The Census Bureau is hiring

during a pandemic?

Weird.

What kind of job is it?

- Says here you go door to
door and collect economic

and demographic information
and submit the data.

That's it?

- Yeah.
- Sounds easy.

What's the pay?

Oh shit. 20 bucks an hour.

How has this job not been taken yet?

- I don't know, but we need
to go right now and apply.

Yeah, let's go.

(hood thuds)

Well, this isn't going anywhere.

Well, now what?

- We can always go ask Jocelyn
if we can borrow her car.

- How far away is it?
- Just a couple blocks.

Alright, guess we're walking.

Let's go.

(Lia knocking)

- Weird. Her car is here.
- Yeah.

Can you see anything?

- Huh. Looks like there's
something covering the glass.

Okay, let's go to the side door.

Yeah.

(energetic music)

(game chimes)

- Aw, thank you for the
tip, Mr. Pickle Tickle.

(game chimes)

Thank you.

Who was that?

Dr. McHuge. Aw.

Thank you, Dr. McHuge.

(game chimes)

You want me to do what? Again?

Okay, fine. But this is the last time.

(Jocelyn cooing)

Hey there.

BRB, boys. How did you get in here?

- Well, we tried knocking,
but you didn't answer,

so we went around the side door.

What is all of this

- Girls gotta make a
living somehow, right?

It started a few months ago
and it wasn't that great,

but now that everyone's staying at home,

it's given my channel a chance to grow.

And I'm super popular now.

So, we kind of need to borrow your car

for a few days, if that's okay.

Of course.

I have been working remotely.

I haven't even had to
use that for a few days.

- That's the second
dick I've seen recently.

Technically, that's a dildo.

There you go.

I was supposed to take
it into the dealership

for some factory recall
or something like that.

So, but whatever, as
long as you bring it back

with a full tank of gas,
it's totally fine with me.

- Okay, thanks.
- Yeah, no problem.

I missed you guys.

We missed you too.

I'd give you a hug,

but you're a little erect at the moment.

Oh, yeah. I'll just tuck that.

Thanks again, girl. We love you.

No problem. I love you too.

Thanks again.

- Okay. It looks like
everything's in order.

So, paperwork is filled out and signed.

Okay. We just need to issue you a route.

So first, let me give you your lanyards.

You'll wear these.

So, we don't have a
lot of available routes

in desired locations.

However, I do have one on
South Columbus Street, Dakota,

Manzanita, and Diamond Street.

I don't know how comfortable I feel

working in those areas.

- Yeah. Are you sure you
don't have any other routes?

I don't.

However, because of the
current unprecedented times,

the state is actually
offering pay incentives,

which makes this $25 an hour.

[Both] We'll take it.

Hi there. Good afternoon.

My name's Lia. This is Kali.

We're with the Census Bureau.

Can we ask you a few questions?

Sure.

- Okay. What's your age
and employment status?

- I'm 57 and retired.
- Okay.

Any relatives or a spouse living with you?

- No. My kids are grown
and my husband's dead.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

Don't be. He was such an asshole.

Treated me like shit,

so one night I just decided
to poison his TV dinner.

Still to this day, nobody knows.

You guys can keep a secret, right?

I'm just kidding. Holy, you guys.

Oh, you girls look like
you're gonna shit your pants.

(both laughing nervously)

Okay, so one last question.

How long have you lived here?

- 32 years. Long enough
to see it go to shit.

Well, that, that's all of our questions.

We, we appreciate your time.

- Hey, you guys want a cookie?
- [Both] No, thank you.

(Kali knocking)

- What do you want?
- Hi, I'm Kali.

This is Lia, and we're
with the Census Bureau.

We just wanted to ask a few questions.

- What kind of questions?
- Well, first,

how many family members live here?

(door thuds)

What's going on, brother?

- These two girls came around
and started asking questions

about our family and shit.

- We're with the Census
Bureau. We just collect data.

- Who told you to collect
data on our family?

It's just from some list we were given.

Who gave you the list, ICE? INS?

No, no.

I think there's been some
kind of misunderstanding.

The data that we collect is for the city.

They give it to lawmakers
for policies and stuff.

Like immigration?

- No, no. I, I mean, at
least I don't think so.

It's just whatever
information you wanna give us.

Look, we don't care about your status

and we don't have to even
ask any more questions.

- Yeah.
- So we're just gonna go.

No, you're not going nowhere.

Hey, hey, hey, hey. Stop.

Stop, no. What are you doing?
(speaking in foreign language)

Put the knife away and
you gimme the pistola.

(person speaking in foreign language)

What's the matter with
you guys, you mentals.

Apologize right now.

Orita, Miguel, this is why you're single.

Andele Miguel, apologize.

- I'm sorry for my
actions. Please forgive me.

You too, dumbass. Andele.

I apologize. Can you forgive me?

Apology accepted.

I am so sorry. Bless you girls.

They really, really are good boys, okay?

You guys, they're just a
little bit scared right now

with everything and a little edgy.

Okay? So you girls go have a
good day and everything, okay?

Oh, by the way, they are single.

[Both] I have a boyfriend.

- So pretty, so pretty
girls. Oh my goodness.

Okay, you go have a very
nice day. God bless you.

Okay, goodbye. God bless you.

Goodbye.

That's it. No more. I'm done.

Oh, come on.

We've only gone to two houses,
and $25 an hour. Remember?

I don't care.

Literally everyone in this
neighborhood is a fucking psycho.

Not everyone is going to be like that.

We probably just got off to a bad start.

Come on, let's go to the next house.

I'm sure it won't be bad.

Fine, but if one more person

confesses to murder, tries to kidnap us

or does literally anything
else crazy, I'm done.

Get the hell outta here

and take your China virus with you!

(gunshots popping)

Shit! I'm not a runner.

(bugs chirping)

Okay.

Thanks.

Bye.

Finally, got everything
set up with unemployment.

Everything's set up.

It's gonna be four months

before we start receiving benefits.

Four months?

I don't think there's a job out there

that's gonna pay enough to
make ends meet before then.

What we really need is
something with a large payday,

something under the table, off the grid,

untaxable, all that stuff.

We could always go see friend.

Yeah, we could go see friend.

Let's just go do it tomorrow.

Okay.

(upbeat music)

Ah. Woo.

(someone knocks)

Come in.

- I got (indistinct).
- Yeah, let's do this.

All right. Ooh.

The usual.

Ain't no usual.

I gave you the good shit. Come on.

More.

- Leave me dry.
- Yeah, that's what I thought.

You know better. Holla.

- What's up, friend?
- Hey girl, what's up?

- Hi.
- So let me guess,

you here because you
need something, right?

- We need a job. Something
that pays good and soon.

Damn. What's the rush?

- Well, the restaurants are
all closed, so we can't work.

We're behind on everything

and if we don't come up
with some money soon,

we're gonna be homeless.

- Shit. I can easily hook
you up to my porn guy.

- No.
- You got anything

a little more PG-13?

Fast money that don't play

by PG-13 rules, you know what I mean?

Okay, fair.

But can you at least try
to think of something?

- Hang on for a sec. I
think I know someone.

Give me a minute. Grab a beer.

(upbeat music continues)

I'm getting nervous.

Don't be.

Everyone who's ever used this
guy has never had a problem.

- I hope you're right.
- I am.

(upbeat music continues)

Damn. I just hooked y'all up.

You lucky. You real lucky.

Great. What is it?

It's this wealthy dude, right?

He hasn't had female
company in a long while.

If we said no to porn,

what makes you think we're
gonna say yes to prostitution?

Whoa. Let me finish, bitch.

You ain't gonna be fucking
the dude. He's a paraplegic.

His shit doesn't even work.

All you gotta do is be sweet and sexy

and dance for him for a little bit.

$500 a piece is the pay.

Just dancing? Nothing else?

Hey look, y'all figure that shit out.

I just hooked you up with a
broke dick. You're welcome.

You just make sure he's
happy when you done.

We good?

A "thank you, friend?"

- Thanks.
- Thank you.

Ungrateful bitches.

So, how do we get paid?

- You rende the service
client pay me and I pay y'all.

- So, if he has a broke
dick, what's he even into?

He's a "Yellowstone" fan.

So dress up like a
couple of buckle bunnies.

Buckle bunnies?

I unfortunately know what that is.

Okay, I'll text y'all the details.

Be there 9:00pm tonight.

Okay.

(bugs chirping)

I cannot believe we're doing this.

Won't be any different

than when you did the Hoedown
Showdown on Country Night.

Woo! Yeah.

Oh my God. Give it here.

That was a mistake.

I don't know what I was thinking.

Let's just get this over with.

I got some of our favorite
music on the speaker.

- This reminds me of a
movie I saw one time.

How so?

Well, this husband hires his wife

to like secretly dance for him.

Only she doesn't know that he's a spy.

Then they get interrupted
by a bunch of bad guys

and a nuclear bomb goes off.

What are you talking about?

Oh, showtime.

Not a word of this to anyone ever.

Not a word.

(dramatic western music)

Ready for your private rodeo, cowboy?

(upbeat country music)

(upbeat country music continues)

(sighs) My back.

- How bad is it?
- Pretty bad.

Ah.

Ah.

Almost there. Ah.

Almost got it.

Ah, almost there.

Hey.

Oh.

(bones crack)

Hey, dude?

- Dude?
- Are you okay?

- Hey dude?
- Fuck.

I don't think he's breathing.

- No.
- [Both] No!

How? How is my client dead?

Well, it's not exactly our fault.

He was alive before you showed up.

You arrived. Now he's dead.

So because we are too hot

and his shitty heart couldn't take it,

we're at fault?

We did everything we were asked to do.

We should still get paid.

I can't collect money from the dead.

So we did all of that for nothing?

Yeah.

Is there another job we can do?

No. So you can fuck that up, too?

Well, how about a job

that doesn't involve someone
already circling the drain?

(laughs) You funny. You know that?

Thank you.

- Contact this dude I
know. His name is Jean.

He'll hook you up with a job.

- Thanks, friend.
- Thank you.

(calm piano music)

So, you're Jean?

Yes, I am Jean Bon Jovi.

Say again?

Jean Bon Jovi.

Dude, your name is John Bon Jovi.

No, no, no, no. It is Jean Bon Jovi.

I was bullied about that as a child

and I will not tolerate mockery.

Hey. Hey, sorry.

Kali gets confused sometimes
from her prescriptions.

It's bad medicine.

Okay. I understand.

I'm sensitive and I do not
want to frighten you off.

- No worries. We weren't
going to run away.

May I offer you a drink?

Nope. Just here about the job.

Okay. (speaking in foreign language)

Does the job involve anything illegal?

Yes and no. Does it matter?

You need the money, no?

I mean the law, I'm okay with,

I just don't want a police
bulletin of us reading,

"Wanted, dead or alive."

Nice.

So do you want to hear about the job?

Of course.

Shit's been crazy

and right now we're
just living on a prayer.

Good one.

- So here's the scoop. I
am going through a divorce.

All of my as remain frozen
until there is a settlement made

with that bitch of an ex-wife.

You know we're not assassins, right?

We don't kill spouses.

- No, of course not.
That's not what I want.

I do have a soul. I just want
you to go to my business.

Open my safe, get my father's
gold collectible coins.

That bitch should not get half of them.

- That's it? Just get
the coins from your safe?

- That's it is. Easy, no?
- Why can't you just do it?

It's bullshit.

She says I'm leaving you. So I get mad.

I throw a glass against the wall.

She gets wet standing over there.

Blah, blah, blah, blah,
blah. I was arrested.

How much is the pay?

Does a thousand each sound good?

- I'm cool. You cool, Kali?
- Yeah.

If we pull this off, I'll be
sleeping in a bed of roses.

- So, I will text you with
the information you'll need,

the address, the alarm code.

Now, I need this done by
tonight. I can trust you, yes?

Totally. Keep the faith.

We got this. I'll be there for you.

Be careful. Stay safe, ladies.

[Both] Always.

(both laughing)

If shit goes sideways,

we'll go down in a blaze of glory.

(buttons beeping)

That vault is huge.

Yeah. This place used to be a bank.

What are you doing?

I have the combination on my phone.

I already know it.

Okay.

And done.

Cool.

(vault rumbling)

This might be the easiest job ever.

Yeah.

- Is this okay?
- It's all right.

I just play on my phone all night.

The alarm isn't set. What the hell?

(buttons beeping)

Yeah, I armed it now.

Just don't open any doors before you go.

- Please, officer. I
don't wanna go to jail.

- There you go, baby.
- Are you recording?

- Yeah. I may have to handcuff
you for my own safety.

- I completely understand.
Ooh, is that your baton?

(laughing) No.

Ooh.

(both exhaling)

(officer laughing)

(camera shuttering)

Yeah. On the desk.

(officer and companion laughing)

(buttons beeping)

(energetic music)

- Oh, show me your baton,
Mr. Security Guard.

- Ooh, someone's gonna
need a strip search.

(both laughing)

I've been a naughty girl.

Oh my God. I can't believe we saw that.

Best thing ever.

She was like, actually into it.

She was so ready for it.

I wonder how many chicks he gets that way.

(both laughing)

[Kali] Oh, I love this song actually.

- Great. You ready?
- [Lia] Ready.

[Kali] You gonna hit the beat?

(energetic rock music)

(both thudding dashboard)

(airbags pop)

- I think I know what
that recall was about.

I swallowed my gum.

(laughs) Very nice. Very nice.

Very nice. Well done, ladies.

- Yeah. Piece of cake.
- Payment as promised.

- Thank you.
- Yeah, thank you.

This is lovely. Can you feel the love?

I'm in between relationships right now,

so I'm kinda in and out of love.

It's because you give love a bad name.

No, no, no, no, no.

Look, you are a very lovely girl

and I am sure you're going to
make some man happy, or woman.

So, you got another job for us?

Perhaps.

You two probably clean up
good. Can you serve cocktails?

Yeah. That's kind of our wheelhouse.

But restaurants are all shut down.

- This is no restaurant.
This is a private club.

- Where is it?
- That is a secret.

Only members know,

but I could have a driver come
pick you up at my business.

Yeah. How much does it pay?

That depends on how good you are.

The club pays well,

and of course you'll tips
from the wealthy members.

This is a place where you want
to wear a little black dress.

You want to look hotter than hot.

- We can do that.
- Good luck, ladies.

(energetic music)

Okay. Driver's about a minute away.

I hope someone doesn't drive by

and think we're two high-end
hookers or something.

- I'm pretty sure high-end hookers

don't wait by the street at night.

I mean, if I saw us, I'd be like,

look at those two hot bitches
waiting for their limo

to take 'em to their
high-end hooker palace.

- We are not hookers.
We are high end though.

Hell yeah, we are.

(door thuds)

(horn honks)

All right, hop in.

You want us to get in the trunk?

- Yeah, hop in.
- Why?

- Because you're not trusted
to know the location.

So, hop in.

Can't you just blindfold us

and let us ride in the back or something?

Well, I could take this black bag,

I could put it over your head,
zip tie it around your neck.

It'll screw up your hair and your makeup.

You gotta breathe your own carbon dioxide.

Or you can hop in.

All right. There you go.

Sit, spin, roll. Got it.

Sit. Spin, roll.

There you go. You're inside.

Look at that. It's like,
I've done this before.

(trunk thuds)

(door thuds)

(engine whirring)

- Ow.
- Sorry.

Ah.

I can't believe we're doing this.

We're definitely crossing the Rubicon.

The what?

The Rubicon?

The river in Rome that Caesar
crossed with this army.

It caused a civil war.

It means the point of no return.

Dude, just say the point of no return.

- (sighs) You don't think we're
getting trafficked, do you?

Oh my God. Why would you say that?

- Because if you're picking
up any trafficking vibes,

I'd like to know.

- We are in the truck of a
car being driven by a stranger

we just met through a man named Bon Jovi.

I'm getting all the vibes.

- You didn't share any
reservations with me?

I'm sorry.

I thought we were on the same page

when it came to those reservations.

If we are getting trafficked, I'll try

to escape and send you help.

You're gonna escape without me?

- Statistically blondes are
more preferred with traffickers.

So while they're occupied with you,

I might have a chance to escape.

Occupied?

You mean when I'm being...

Are we there already?

That was fast.

I guess time happens faster in a trunk.

That's not how time works.

- Mm, time's relative. How
many trunks have you been in?

How many trunks have you been in?

(shoes thudding)

[Bartender] You must be the newbies.

That's us, the newbies.

I'm Lia. This is Kali.

- Alright. Well mostly these
people just wanna be served.

So just continue to walk around,

take drink orders and try to be seen,

'cause you're not just
servers, you're also eye candy.

Of course we are.

(upbeat music)

- Awesome, jerking. Really-
- Hi. Got some wine here.

Yeah. And a beer.

- There you are.
- Thank you.

Can I get you anything else?

- I'm fine, thanks.
- Thank you.

Of course.

And, keep the change.

Watch the hands.

I'm not boarding a plane,
and you're not TSA.

Sorry.

What are you doing touching her ass?

- Sorry, I was just being
polite. I put my hand out.

You shouldn't be touching her at all.

Sorry. I know.

Next time I'll just fist bump her.

No, you can't fist her either.

That's not what I said.

- Oh. Hey, Mike.
- Hey Johnny.

- Hey, how you doing?
- I'm alright.

- What's going on?
- Eh, usual.

- Alright, good seeing you.
- You too.

- It's my friend Johnny.
Haven't seen him in forever.

Wanna play some poker?

Yeah. Heck yeah. Let's do that.

Hope we get to drink.

- Man, I'll catch up with you.
- Thank you sir.

No problem.

(upbeat music continues)

Are you shitting me?

- Two bourbons?
- Right here.

(upbeat music continues)

(clippers buzzing)

Ladies?

I would appreciate it
if you would concentrate

on the gaming room.

That's where our VIP members are.

- [Both] Okay.
- Thank you.

- It's about time.
- Hey, I was working.

- Work me.
- Ooh. (laughing)

Oh, oh. Hi, hey.

What was our safe word again?

- Don't be a little bitch.
- That's five words.

- (clears throat) Yo,
Romeo, you got a moment?

One second, doll.

Johnny, you're supposed
to be telling our members

of our new location.

You need to be keeping them happy.

- Yeah. I'm about to make
this member really happy.

Yeah.

And why are the new girls dressed up

like they're going to prom?

- Oh (laughing) that's just
Bon Jovi's hazing the new girls

Don't worry. They'll figure it out.

- Johnny, I need you to be
professional and responsible.

Yeah, of course. I got a condom.

No, son. No, no, no, no, no, no.

What?

- We might have to make
this a little quick.

(energetic music)

(game piece clinks)

(members laughing)

(upbeat music continues)

- New girls, I see?
- Yes.

They came recommended by one
of our VIP members, Jean.

Bon Jovi? (laughs)

Poor guy. You hear about his divorce?

- I did.
- Sad.

Well, I'm gonna get a
drink. Find me later?

I will do that.

(upbeat music continues)

- Your bet.
- 250.

Call 250.

150.

Show your hand.

Oh (indistinct) high.

Not even a pair? Like a
pair of balls? (laughs)

Real funny, Shirley.

Oh, come on. Buy in.

Play some more.

Oh wait, you don't have your wallet.

It's in your wife's purse
with your balls. (laughing)

(upbeat music continues)

That's to you.

250.

- I'll see your 250
and raise you 400 more.

- All in.
- All in.

All in.

Call.

(laughs) Lay it down, boys.

- Ace high flush.
- Ah. Suck it.

Unbelievable.

(upbeat music continues)

Well, well aren't you a pretty thing?

- Thank you.
- You any good?

Or just as as shitty as those guys were?

I'm just hoping to have some fun.

You got a name, pretty face?

Jordona.

- (laughs) Jordona? What
are you, from Krypton?

- That lady playing
poker is something else.

Yes she is. Yeah.

She's certainly earned the
nickname, Shit Talking Shirley.

However, she tips really
well if you can stand her.

So, this place has a casino?

Somewhat.

People gamble with their own money

with each other, some with the house.

All gambling is approved or
moderated by the manager though.

Hmm. What kind of gambling?

Whatever the members come up with.

As long as it's approved.

Last year's Super Bowl was
pretty interesting though.

Huh.

200.

Makes it 200.

- Call.
- Calls.

Aces when the pot.

- (laughing) Well no
beginners look for you.

I'm taking all your money

and I'm sure you get boned more than I do,

but wait, who's there?

Chlamydia! (laughing)

Are you eye raping me?

Do you play for the other team?

No. Just thinking.

Well, good. I'm strictly dickly.

(laughing) I don't even feel bad for you.

I'm sure you've got plenty of guys

on your scrotation waiting
to cheer you up. (laughing)

[Dealer] No more bets.

(people speaking indistinctly)

Check.

All in.

Really, girl.

If you're in, I'm in.

Full house, bitch. (laughing)

Aw, I only have two pair.

Give the devil her due.

Oh, my bad. It was two pairs of threes.

She has four of a kind.

What was my tell?

Sorry?

My tell. What was it?

You lick your teeth.

Kind of like that, but not sexy.

Maybe if you didn't have
a figure of a waterbed.

Oh honey, cheer up.

I'm sure you have plenty of guys

coming up to you and asking,

"Hey, where's your pretty friend?"

[Member] Every time. Every time.

(people speaking indistinctly)

Hey Shirley, I had fun.

(dramatic music)

(Shirley panting)

(Shirley grunting)

(both grunting)

(Shirley thuds)

Someone get this piece of outta here.

- All right Shirley,
you're out here. Come on.

Jordona, I am so sorry.

You realize I'm a VIP member, right?

Yes, I understand. Of course.

Your whole night will be on the house.

- I want more discretion
on the club policies.

I, I will make it happen.

Somebody give me a fucking drink.

- What is this place?
- Some employment. Stay cool.

(paper rippling)

Oh. So how'd we do?

We made 800.

- Hey, that's almost worth
letting old guys grab my ass.

- Oh.
- Ah.

- Bonus titty money.
- Just for you.

Hmm.

So, I did the math.

The club is every Saturday

and if we keep averaging
$800, we'll have enough money

to cover all of our expenses
until unemployment kicks in,

but just barely.

- Okay, well here's to
us serving rich assholes

in a secret James Bond
underground nightclub.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

(upbeat rock music)

- Hi guys.
- Hi. How are you today?

Good, how are you?

- Thank you.
- Of course.

- A couple glasses of wine.
- Thank you both.

Here's that board for you.

- Enjoy.
- Thank you so much.

(upbeat rock music continues)

Tonight will be fun.

(upbeat rock music continues)

- Really?
- What? I have split ends.

Thanks.

All our money goes to the same place.

Thank you.

There you go.

There you are.

Oh, thank you.

There you go.

Uh, two olives, honey. Try again.

Sorry about that. I'll be right back.

(upbeat music)

- She wants two olives.
- Of course.

I really cannot not stand her.

Get used to it.

The little (indistinct) see me again.

- There you go.
- Thank you.

There you go. Two olives.

Call for 200.

[Dealer] 200 and you.

[Kali] Dark spaces. (laughing)

(door thuds)

Okay. There you go.

You're trusted with the location now.

- Thanks.
- Yep. Have a good night.

- Holy shit.
- What?

It's like a minute down the road.

- Oh, that's why the trunk
times went by so fast.

Huh.

(birds chirping)

(phone buzzing)

(buttons beeping)

Shit.

What?

I just got a text

that the club's not
gonna be open this week.

What? We can't afford to miss a week.

We need work.

Yeah, I know.

- Grocery stores, pot shops,
pawn shops, hardware stores.

Everybody but us is open.

Even the politicians
writing these mandates.

You know, they never
had to skip a paycheck.

Is there anything I can do?

No. I don't know what we're going to do.

Maybe Bon Jovi has a job for us.

No.

I am so tired of running
errands for shady motherfuckers.

I would rather be out on
the street than in jail.

Well, maybe we can take out a loan.

- I have bad credit
and you have no credit,

which is the same thing.

It's hard enough living
paycheck to paycheck.

Now, I can't even do that.
I'm a professional server.

I love to entertain. I cater.

I converse with my
customers and I'm good at it

because I'm a fucking
thankful person. (sobbing)

I am not allowed to earn a living

and there's nothing I can
do about it. (sobbing)

(mellow music)

- [Reporter] One of
Chicago's best restaurants

is shutting down permanently

because of the coronavirus pandemic.

[Reporter] 10,000 restaurants

in the country could close
in the next three weeks.

- Two thirds of all the
restaurants in this state

could be forced to close
down by the end of this year.

- They have not given us money
and they have shut us down.

We cannot survive. My
staff cannot survive.

The fuck do they want us to do?

We can't survive anymore, man.

I can't pay the fucking bills.
I'm behind on everything.

- And they set up a
movie company right next

to my outdoor patio,
which is right over here.

Tell me that this is dangerous,

but right next to me as a slap in my face.

I continue to follow the rules,

and you guys still, time after time

are given me citations.

- [Reporter] A large protest
erupting in Staten Island

after a bar owner was arrested
for refusing to comply

with New York's COVID-19 regulations.

- For every single person
that doesn't have unemployment

that does not have a job,

and all the businesses
that are going under.

And we need your help.

We need somebody to do
something about this.

We're all this together.

We'll just all starve to death and die.

- Hey.
- Hey.

I'm sorry about earlier.

Don't be. It's okay.

I get it. We're in the same boat.

Thanks.

I was trying to think of
anything I would be good at

that could help us generate a windfall.

But I couldn't come up with anything.

- Yeah, I was trying to come
up with something too. No luck.

- Wish I was good at poker
like that Jordona bitch.

Yeah, I know.

I was watching her play

and read the other players
to see if they were bluffing

and that's how she wins.

She's not keeping track of the cards

or she could have won
several hands way earlier.

- What do you mean?
- So, three hands

before one of her big wins, she folded.

She could have won at least two

of them based on the cards I saw.

- What's the number to
your mom's landline?

- 555-646-1648.

Why?

And what was the exact hand Jordona had

before she folded?

- She had two pairs,
nines and Jacks, 10 high.

Why are you asking me all of this?

Oh my God. Do you not get it?

Get what?

You have a photographic memory.

What? Really?

Watch.

Ah, okay.

Read that back to me,
but from right to left.

497 281.

- Holy shit. Do you not
know how awesome this is?

How did you not know this about yourself?

- I don't know. I guess
I never thought about it.

You mean you can't remember like this?

- No.
- Well, shit.

I have an idea.

We take our money back to the club

and you win us more at the table.

But I've never gambled before.

- That doesn't matter.
You know how to play.

The betting formalities, we can look up.

We have two weeks until
the club opens again.

- Are you in?
- Yeah.

Yeah. Let's do this.

(dramatic music)

(upbeat music)

(people speaking indistinctly)

Chips.

(people speaking indistinctly continues)

(upbeat music continues)

Are you not working here anymore?

I'm here to play.

You would have to be a member to play.

Can I become one?

There is a process.

There are dues, fees, paperwork.

I'll cover her for tonight.

I can make that exception since
I have discretion, correct?

Yes.

Welcome to the club, Miss.

[Lia] Lia.

Looks like it's gonna be a girl's night.

Are you sure you wanna risk
losing all your tip money?

I know you work so hard
pouring all those drinks.

I'm just here to have some fun.

Me too.

(people speaking indistinctly continues)

Bets 400.

Calls 400.

Show your hand.

Straight to the queen.

Have a straight to the
ace. Higher straight wins.

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

Bets 200.

Raise.

- Raise 400.
- Raise 400.

All in.

Call.

Calls to all in. Show your cards.

Diamonds, a girl's best friend.

King high flush.

I have three queens.

Sorry, honey. Flush wins.

Oh, and I forgot a pair of fives.

(people murmuring)

Full house Queens over fives.

(audience applauds)

- She cheated.
- No I didn't.

Yes you did. You had a tell, I saw it.

- What tell?
- When you have a weak hand,

you sit up straight to
look more confident.

Oh, you mean this tell?

The tell I purposely made to fool you.

You saw what I wanted you to see.

(dramatic music)

Who do you think you are?

Don't start something you can't finish.

Oh, I'll finish. Trust me.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Ladies, calm the fuck down.

You and me, right here.

- This is not what our
establishment caters to.

I have discretional rights. It's a bet.

Double the table or nothing. You and me.

I'll take that bet.

(people speaking indistinctly)

- My money's on Jordona.
- Jordona.

Taking the blonde.

Getting in on this?

This will start and end when I say.

(dramatic music continues)

What are you doing?

I just won us a ton of money.
You did not have to do this.

You did your part. Now I'm doing mine.

- This is what I'm good at.
- What about your back?

I will literally fight through it.

I'm not going home with nothing.

- Once again, why are we
resorting to violence?

- Because it's America.
- Oh.

I don't know which one.

You better get a bet in
before the fight starts.

(dramatic music continues)

Are you seriously letting this happen?

- I can use this to petition
the board to have her removed.

- Ballsy.
- I'm not going to miss her.

And it won't be too bad if
she loses a couple teeth.

Done with your pep talk, honey?

- I'm not your honey, but
you could be my bitch.

I grew up fighting with three brothers.

What makes you think that you can beat me?

Because I have a fire inside of me,

fueled by years of dealing with impatient,

ungrateful assholes like you.

My rage is literally at
surface fucking level.

Blonde.

(rock music)

Begin.

(both grunting)

(strikes thudding)

(rock music continues)

Fuck.

Hurt your fun bag, bitch?

(strikes thudding)

(both grunting)

Dislodge your IUD, bitch?

(strikes thudding)

(both grunting)

Lia, back.

(Kali grunting)

(bones cracking)

- Oh my God.
- Okay.

- Is that good?
- Yeah.

Okay. Go get her.

(rock music)

(both grunting)

(strikes thudding)

Yeah.

(strikes thudding)

(both grunting)

Who headbutts?

This bitch.

(strikes thudding)

(both laughing)

Oh my gosh.

How's that million dollar smile?

Bitch!

(strikes thud)

(people speaking indistinctly)

(rock music)

Yo Adrian, I did it.

- Oh no, you have head
trauma. My name's Lia.

I love you.

You're done.

Vega.

(upbeat music)

Oh, all right. Come on.

Pay up. Blondie won.

I know, I know. Here's your money.

Oh, yes. (laughs) you Thank you.

- I'll need you to sign
this before you are allowed

to leave so you don't hold the liable

for damages from this little shit show.

- Let's go home.
- Yeah. Let's get outta here.

[Kali] Oh.

All right. Let's take a peek.

- [Kali] That bad, huh?
- Yeah.

Let's keep this on here a little longer.

[Kali] No, no. I wanna take a look.

[Lia] Okay.

- You know, that's not
as bad as I thought.

So, how much did we make?

- Oh, we made enough to
last well into next year.

Plus we'll have even more
when unemployment comes in.

Oh, we deserve this.

Yeah. We do.

Ooh, I hurt all over.

Well, here. How about you focus on this?

Come on. Work it girl.

- Show me your A game.
- Don't make me laugh.

(laughing) That hurts.

I want you to move that mouth.

Ow. Don't make me laugh.

It hurts.

You're cleaning this up, you know.

No, you are, 'cause you're not dancing.

(both laughing)

(shoes clicking)

Hey boss. New girls are here.

- Ah, Jean sent you?
- What gave it away?

Ah, follow me please, ladies.

(doors thud)

(horn honks)

(door creaks)

(upbeat mellow music)

I now pronounce you husband and wife.

You may kiss your bride.

- What happened here?
- What happened to your face?

- Occupational hazard.
- What is going on here?

- Well, ever since the
government shut the restaurants

and the bars down, we
had to make ends meet,

so we became a chapel.

The takeout wasn't working out.

So we had to figure
other ways to make money.

That's actually a pretty cool idea.

Yeah. Thank you. Thank you.

So how are you two doing?

- We're good.
- Yeah.

Oh my God. What happened?

We went a hand to poker and
I had to beat a bitch up

for our money in this secret underground

James Bond type nightclub.

- What?
- Long story.

Oh.

It's nice to see you.

- Oh, okay guys.
- Oh, oh, oh, sorry.

Sorry.

I really missed you.

- I missed you too.
- Oh, yeah.

You look like shit.

Thanks.

- Can we come hang out with
you guys if we get married?

Absolutely.

- Who said anything
about us getting married?

(people speaking indistinctly)

Hey everyone. Happy 4th of July.

(crowd cheering)

Lia. Let's get some shots going in here.

I'm a customer now. I'm not serving.

You're leaving us?

I got my CPA license.

Apparently I'm really good with numbers

and memorizing tax law.

Oh man.

I got shots.

Let's do some shots.

Hey, hey. Hey Joshua. Hold on.

How about a shot for the birthday girl?

Proud dad right here.

(energetic music)

- How old are you turning?
- 22.

22? All right.

Ready for your birthday shot?

- Yeah.
- Okay.

I'm gonna have you turn
around. Tilt your head back.

Open your mouth.

(crowd applauds)

Hey Jocelyn, me too. Me too.

(crowd laughs)

(crowd applauds)

(energetic music continues)

- Oh my God, I am so
sorry. Got held up at work.

Eric formed his LLC wrong and
his books are all jacked up

and he thought he could
claim his dog as a dependent.

Blah, blah, blah. I'm gonna press play.

- Wait.
- Hurry up, bitch. (sighs)

- Okay.
- Finally.

(dramatic music)

(leaves crunching)

[Both] The wizard.

(magic rumbles)

I thought I lost you.

Our love beat death.

What?

Why would you kill them off

just to bring them back the next episode?

That's bullshit.

Fuck this show.

(upbeat soulful music)

(upbeat soulful music continues)

♪ Strolling through a town that I know ♪

♪ No way to leave, nowhere to go ♪

♪ Stuck in a rut of vice and woe ♪

♪ Study my steps ♪

♪ And go with the flow ♪

♪ Ode to the alley, it's the
roughest place I've ever been ♪

♪ It's the roughest place I've ever been ♪

(upbeat soulful music continues)

♪ Dusty's dice are thrown on the floor ♪

♪ A tall glass of whiskey, no more ♪