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1
00:00:02,180 --> 00:00:04,740
Well, I had a real nice time tonight.
2
00:00:05,040 --> 00:00:06,900
Yeah, I had a real nice time, too.
3
00:00:07,480 --> 00:00:08,530
Real nice.
4
00:00:09,200 --> 00:00:10,940
I never want to go out with you again.
5
00:00:12,320 --> 00:00:13,680
Yeah, I'm cool with that.
6
00:00:13,920 --> 00:00:16,800
I think this might have been my worst
first date ever.
7
00:00:16,801 --> 00:00:19,659
Yeah, you know, from the way you
delivered my mail, I had no idea you
8
00:00:19,660 --> 00:00:20,800
a mean, violent racist.
9
00:00:21,400 --> 00:00:25,619
Well, sorry I'm so cranky. Maybe it's
because I have a backache from hauling
10
00:00:25,620 --> 00:00:26,670
your porn.
11
00:00:27,500 --> 00:00:32,209
Have a nice life, sicko. Hey, hey, if
pornography is sick, then how come it's
12
00:00:32,210 --> 00:00:35,580
delivered to me by the government of the
United States of America?
13
00:00:40,330 --> 00:00:41,380
Ben!
14
00:00:42,070 --> 00:00:43,650
Mail lady didn't work out, huh?
15
00:00:43,990 --> 00:00:46,580
And you only got how many weeks to find
a wife? Three.
16
00:00:46,581 --> 00:00:50,189
Well, maybe you should try your garbage
lady. She's used to being seen around
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00:00:50,190 --> 00:00:51,570
town with sacks of crap.
18
00:00:54,810 --> 00:00:55,860
She's engaged.
19
00:00:57,890 --> 00:00:59,940
Hey, man, how'd it go with the mail
lady?
20
00:01:00,110 --> 00:01:02,160
Terrible. I don't know where else to
look.
21
00:01:02,161 --> 00:01:05,509
Don't worry, Drew. I think you'll be
getting some calls from a lot of single
22
00:01:05,510 --> 00:01:06,670
women real soon.
23
00:01:07,970 --> 00:01:09,020
What'd you do?
24
00:01:10,010 --> 00:01:13,150
We found a dignified way for you to meet
eligible women.
25
00:01:14,010 --> 00:01:15,060
What'd you do?
26
00:01:15,870 --> 00:01:19,470
We put your name, picture, and phone
number on 3 ,000 buzz beer bottles.
27
00:01:21,250 --> 00:01:25,709
I want you to be my wife. I'm Drew
Carey. Honest, reliable, generous, 8 %
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00:01:25,710 --> 00:01:26,830
alcohol by volume.
29
00:01:29,100 --> 00:01:30,300
That sounds about right.
30
00:03:05,290 --> 00:03:06,410
goes down the drain.
31
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Can't wait to get home.
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00:03:42,810 --> 00:03:45,160
I can't believe they used this picture
of Drew.
33
00:03:45,710 --> 00:03:48,010
I mean, he's got way prettier eyes than
this.
34
00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:51,350
You're still hot for the pig?
35
00:03:53,590 --> 00:03:54,970
Mimi, I don't know what to do.
36
00:03:54,971 --> 00:03:58,449
I'm not ready to get married, but I
don't want to give him up either.
37
00:03:58,450 --> 00:04:00,170
That sounds selfish, doesn't it?
38
00:04:01,090 --> 00:04:02,290
Here's what you got to do.
39
00:04:02,530 --> 00:04:03,580
Sleep with him.
40
00:04:04,690 --> 00:04:07,150
What? Won't that just complicate things?
41
00:04:07,670 --> 00:04:09,410
Oh, it won't be easy at first.
42
00:04:09,650 --> 00:04:11,710
There'll be five, six days of retching.
43
00:04:12,710 --> 00:04:15,840
Then, of course, you're going to have to
dabble in lesbianism.
44
00:04:16,730 --> 00:04:20,070
But after a suicide attempt, you'll be
ready to move on.
45
00:04:21,570 --> 00:04:23,850
Hey. You bastard.
46
00:04:25,290 --> 00:04:30,129
What? I'm sitting in my bathtub last
night, rocking out to Skinner, pounding
47
00:04:30,130 --> 00:04:33,990
down a few beers, when suddenly I
realize my...
48
00:04:34,410 --> 00:04:36,110
are around your freaking head.
49
00:04:41,150 --> 00:04:43,710
Oh, my God. I mean, my picture saw you
naked?
50
00:04:45,910 --> 00:04:48,980
You know, it looks like condensation,
but it's really tears.
51
00:04:51,890 --> 00:04:55,790
So, Drew, have you met any potential
beer brides yet?
52
00:04:56,010 --> 00:04:58,840
No, but now I know how Jerry Springer
gets all his guests.
53
00:05:00,210 --> 00:05:01,260
Here you are.
54
00:05:02,630 --> 00:05:03,680
May I help you?
55
00:05:03,681 --> 00:05:06,149
I saw your picture on the bottle, and I
just thought we would be the perfect
56
00:05:06,150 --> 00:05:07,200
couple.
57
00:05:07,201 --> 00:05:10,289
I know this looks a little odd. I just
wanted you to see what a beautiful bride
58
00:05:10,290 --> 00:05:11,340
I would be.
59
00:05:11,521 --> 00:05:15,849
Okay, would you mind lifting your veil,
please?
60
00:05:15,850 --> 00:05:17,650
No. You can see it after we're married.
61
00:05:17,651 --> 00:05:22,129
I'm sorry. I'm looking for someone a
little taller who doesn't refer to her
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00:05:22,130 --> 00:05:23,180
as it.
63
00:05:23,850 --> 00:05:26,430
Um, pardon me, but how did you find him
here?
64
00:05:26,431 --> 00:05:29,729
I figured I'd check the neighborhood
bars. I stopped by his house first, but
65
00:05:29,730 --> 00:05:30,669
was too crowded.
66
00:05:30,670 --> 00:05:31,720
Drew, my God.
67
00:05:36,170 --> 00:05:38,700
Don't waste your time. It's just a bunch
of crazies.
68
00:05:41,510 --> 00:05:43,610
Okay, we've got a lot of potential Mrs.
69
00:05:43,830 --> 00:05:47,310
Careys here, and obviously he can only
marry one of you.
70
00:05:48,130 --> 00:05:52,349
Now, Mr. Carey is a very discriminating
man, so don't feel bad if you don't make
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00:05:52,350 --> 00:05:53,400
the cut.
72
00:05:53,930 --> 00:05:55,510
Thank you, Lewis.
73
00:05:55,950 --> 00:05:57,000
All right, ladies.
74
00:05:57,730 --> 00:06:01,090
Does anyone here think oral sex is
disgusting?
75
00:06:12,140 --> 00:06:14,730
No one will give it to me. I've decided
I'm against it.
76
00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:19,650
It's him!
77
00:06:20,180 --> 00:06:21,380
I made you a pie.
78
00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:23,450
Wow.
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00:06:23,580 --> 00:06:25,560
Homemade pie from a desperate stranger.
80
00:06:26,640 --> 00:06:29,650
I'm sure it's perfectly safe. I'll have
a slice of the plater.
81
00:06:29,651 --> 00:06:32,199
Can I talk to you guys for a minute,
please?
82
00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:34,959
Okay, ladies, we'll be back in a minute.
If any of you want to earn extra
83
00:06:34,960 --> 00:06:37,130
credit, there's a lawnmower in the
garage.
84
00:06:37,131 --> 00:06:42,109
What the hell are all these women doing
in my house?
85
00:06:42,110 --> 00:06:44,689
What did you want us to do? We've got a
wedding in three weeks and we haven't
86
00:06:44,690 --> 00:06:45,740
got a bride.
87
00:06:50,390 --> 00:06:54,649
Look, I think what Lewis is saying is
we'd like to see you settle down so we
88
00:06:54,650 --> 00:06:56,270
could finally do some traveling.
89
00:06:57,550 --> 00:07:00,620
Look, putting my picture on these beer
bottles was a bad idea.
90
00:07:00,621 --> 00:07:03,769
You want me to end up with some
desperate booze hound with no wife?
91
00:07:03,770 --> 00:07:04,910
I bring to the marriage.
92
00:07:09,701 --> 00:07:12,019
Aren't you going to get it?
93
00:07:12,020 --> 00:07:13,900
Not now. I'm entertaining nutjobs.
94
00:07:17,220 --> 00:07:20,230
Hey, it's Drew. Please leave a very
short message at the tone.
95
00:07:20,231 --> 00:07:22,059
Hi, Drew.
96
00:07:22,060 --> 00:07:24,259
I'm not calling because I want to get
married.
97
00:07:24,260 --> 00:07:27,819
I just thought you'd like to know that
one of your bottles made all the way
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00:07:27,820 --> 00:07:28,870
here to New Orleans.
99
00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:30,090
Isn't that a kick?
100
00:07:31,600 --> 00:07:33,160
She doesn't sound like a nutjob.
101
00:07:43,790 --> 00:07:44,840
I'm not a midget.
102
00:07:47,070 --> 00:07:51,009
No, that was my friend's idea. They put
my picture on the thing. Hey, what's
103
00:07:51,010 --> 00:07:52,049
your name?
104
00:07:52,050 --> 00:07:55,900
Lily. That's a beautiful name. I always
thought she was the prettiest Munster.
105
00:07:57,950 --> 00:08:02,170
Munster's a TV show. Anyway, can you
hold on one second?
106
00:08:02,730 --> 00:08:04,470
Can you get rid of all these in here?
107
00:08:04,550 --> 00:08:07,980
One of them's still mowing the lawn. You
want me to get rid of her, too?
108
00:08:08,781 --> 00:08:15,269
Let her finish the edging, give her 20
bucks, and tell her we're from different
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00:08:15,270 --> 00:08:16,470
worlds it could never be.
110
00:08:17,570 --> 00:08:19,290
Hey, so tell me about yourself.
111
00:08:22,150 --> 00:08:23,200
Who, me?
112
00:08:23,201 --> 00:08:27,349
Well, it's kind of embarrassing. My
first time was with my high school music
113
00:08:27,350 --> 00:08:28,400
teacher.
114
00:08:30,230 --> 00:08:33,420
Yeah, I mean, it was a little awkward,
but the metronome helped.
115
00:08:35,549 --> 00:08:39,049
Oh, hey, listen, the sun's coming up.
116
00:08:40,850 --> 00:08:42,460
Yeah. We've been up all night.
117
00:08:42,811 --> 00:08:44,899
Okay.
118
00:08:44,900 --> 00:08:48,639
Yeah, it was great talking to you, too.
Hey, listen, if I'm ever down in New
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00:08:48,640 --> 00:08:50,100
Orleans, I'll look you up.
120
00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:52,650
All right.
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00:08:52,880 --> 00:08:53,930
All right, take care.
122
00:08:53,980 --> 00:08:55,030
Bye.
123
00:09:00,580 --> 00:09:02,980
Hey, wake up. What's happening?
124
00:09:03,240 --> 00:09:05,350
Road trip. Going to New Orleans. All
righty.
125
00:09:10,891 --> 00:09:15,539
I'm glad you guys called me to go out to
breakfast.
126
00:09:15,540 --> 00:09:16,590
This is fun.
127
00:09:21,140 --> 00:09:22,580
We're getting kind of far out.
128
00:09:22,581 --> 00:09:24,239
Where are we going anyway?
129
00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:25,290
New Orleans.
130
00:09:25,860 --> 00:09:28,270
Oh, is that that little Cajun place in
the mall?
131
00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:31,070
No, it's the big Cajun place in the Gulf
of Mexico.
132
00:09:34,480 --> 00:09:38,459
Oh, that's why you wanted to use my car,
right? So you wouldn't put the miles on
133
00:09:38,460 --> 00:09:39,510
your own car.
134
00:09:40,040 --> 00:09:41,180
It's your point of view.
135
00:09:41,181 --> 00:09:44,099
Yeah, well, it's important to me to have
a second pair of underwear on a cross
136
00:09:44,100 --> 00:09:45,150
-country trip.
137
00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:48,190
Some girl down there found one of my
bottles.
138
00:09:48,420 --> 00:09:51,490
She called me. We talked all night. And
now I just have to see her.
139
00:09:51,840 --> 00:09:52,890
Are you kidding?
140
00:09:53,340 --> 00:09:56,770
You're telling me that you fell in love
with someone over the phone?
141
00:09:56,880 --> 00:09:57,930
That's ridiculous.
142
00:09:58,380 --> 00:10:00,460
Well, I for one think it's very
romantic.
143
00:10:00,461 --> 00:10:01,859
Oh, yeah?
144
00:10:01,860 --> 00:10:07,779
Yeah? What if she's some crazy, huh, who
hits Drew over the head? and takes his
145
00:10:07,780 --> 00:10:11,380
organs and dumps his body in the swamp.
She doesn't want my organs.
146
00:10:11,980 --> 00:10:13,700
I know one organ she might want.
147
00:10:16,540 --> 00:10:19,000
Yet another triumph.
148
00:10:19,220 --> 00:10:22,640
Yeah. I do hope we'll be hanging our
asses out the window next.
149
00:10:24,071 --> 00:10:31,239
Look, Lily and I talk like we've known
each other forever. You know how it is
150
00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:32,719
with somebody you've known your whole
life.
151
00:10:32,720 --> 00:10:35,790
You know each other so well you can
finish each other's lunch.
152
00:10:35,791 --> 00:10:41,919
really a connection you have with this
woman, or are you just desperate to get
153
00:10:41,920 --> 00:10:44,460
married? It's not the wedding deadline.
154
00:10:45,220 --> 00:10:46,270
It's Louie.
155
00:10:50,180 --> 00:10:51,420
Okay, okay.
156
00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:53,990
I guess I've always wanted to go to New
Orleans.
157
00:10:53,991 --> 00:10:55,339
Thank you.
158
00:10:55,340 --> 00:10:58,239
You know, I've heard in New Orleans it's
legal for you to buy booze and just
159
00:10:58,240 --> 00:11:00,040
walk around the streets drinking it.
160
00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:02,860
Booze with you wherever you go.
161
00:11:03,420 --> 00:11:04,470
Imagine that.
162
00:11:11,391 --> 00:11:17,019
said she gave tourists some closing
time. Maybe she's still here.
163
00:11:17,020 --> 00:11:18,520
Wow, this place is incredible.
164
00:11:19,120 --> 00:11:20,170
Just imagine.
165
00:11:20,940 --> 00:11:23,800
People sat on this couch during the
Civil War.
166
00:11:26,380 --> 00:11:30,560
They put up this painting during the
Civil War.
167
00:11:32,440 --> 00:11:36,100
They adjusted the digital thermostat
during the Civil War.
168
00:11:36,101 --> 00:11:40,939
And during the Civil War, Oswald's great
-grandfather was making love to his own
169
00:11:40,940 --> 00:11:41,990
sister.
170
00:11:46,060 --> 00:11:50,619
given to the state by the Devereaux
family in 1910, and declared a National
171
00:11:50,620 --> 00:11:52,300
Historic Site in 1913.
172
00:11:52,840 --> 00:11:54,520
Does anybody have any questions?
173
00:11:54,940 --> 00:11:56,040
Uh, yeah, I got one.
174
00:11:57,020 --> 00:11:59,460
Am I as cute in person as I am on the
beer bottle?
175
00:12:01,780 --> 00:12:02,980
Okay, back to Cleveland.
176
00:12:03,840 --> 00:12:05,160
Don't, don't, don't, wait.
177
00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:06,850
Wait a minute.
178
00:12:08,360 --> 00:12:09,860
Well, that concludes our tour.
179
00:12:09,861 --> 00:12:13,719
In 15 minutes on the South Lawn, we will
have a reenactment of the execution of
180
00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:14,770
a Union spy.
181
00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:21,230
He's one of ours. We ought to rescue
him. No, no, no, no.
182
00:12:24,900 --> 00:12:27,500
You can't mess with history. We might
never be born.
183
00:12:31,320 --> 00:12:35,299
I'm sorry. I looked so surprised. I just
didn't expect to see you so soon. Yeah,
184
00:12:35,300 --> 00:12:38,970
well, you know, you said you like
spontaneous people. No, I'm glad you're
185
00:12:40,620 --> 00:12:41,860
So, you're Drew Carey?
186
00:12:42,380 --> 00:12:43,430
Yeah.
187
00:12:43,820 --> 00:12:46,470
Sorry about the way I look. I've been in
the car all day.
188
00:12:47,180 --> 00:12:49,650
Before that, I would sit on the couch
for 30 years.
189
00:12:50,680 --> 00:12:56,420
I'm not one to judge. This isn't a hoop
skirt. This is all me.
190
00:12:59,420 --> 00:13:02,730
Hey, I want you to meet my friends. This
is Oswald, Lewis, and Kelly.
191
00:13:02,840 --> 00:13:07,120
Oh. Madam, in the words of a great
southerner, you look finger -licking
192
00:13:13,900 --> 00:13:17,570
for my friend. All he knows of the world
is what he's learned from fast food.
193
00:13:18,320 --> 00:13:22,259
Well, we'll leave you two alone. By the
way, we've known Drew a long time and
194
00:13:22,260 --> 00:13:25,799
you can't do any better. And if it helps
close the deal, we come with the
195
00:13:25,800 --> 00:13:26,850
package.
196
00:13:30,380 --> 00:13:34,840
So, Lily, tour guide, huh?
197
00:13:35,760 --> 00:13:40,320
That's an interesting job for someone
who's 35, 40.
198
00:13:41,480 --> 00:13:42,530
I'm 32.
199
00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:44,360
And this is temporary.
200
00:13:44,361 --> 00:13:48,079
I'm a software engineer, but the company
I worked for last year went under.
201
00:13:48,080 --> 00:13:49,780
Oh, I'm sorry.
202
00:13:52,580 --> 00:13:55,940
This isn't exactly my dream job, but it
does have some nice perks.
203
00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:57,250
They let me live here.
204
00:13:57,580 --> 00:14:01,159
And once a day, I volunteer to be
deflowered by a union general so they
205
00:14:01,160 --> 00:14:02,210
burn down the house.
206
00:14:04,580 --> 00:14:08,640
That's a historical reenactment, right?
So far.
207
00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:18,360
I see one. So, I guess Lily should be
going, huh?
208
00:14:20,120 --> 00:14:21,170
No, I'm kidding.
209
00:14:21,171 --> 00:14:22,999
It's me.
210
00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:24,050
It's me.
211
00:14:24,620 --> 00:14:25,670
I know it's me.
212
00:14:28,100 --> 00:14:31,860
Well, I had a bottle, so I don't know
what you look like.
213
00:14:32,100 --> 00:14:33,720
Do I look like what you imagined?
214
00:14:33,721 --> 00:14:37,499
Uh, well, to tell you the truth, your
personality was so great on the phone, I
215
00:14:37,500 --> 00:14:39,420
was expecting someone really hideous.
216
00:14:41,680 --> 00:14:43,360
And did I meet your expectations?
217
00:14:43,860 --> 00:14:44,910
I'm sorry, but no.
218
00:14:47,180 --> 00:14:49,700
I can't believe you came all this way to
see me.
219
00:14:49,701 --> 00:14:53,799
Yeah, I mean, I never talked to somebody
on the phone that long. Do you do that
220
00:14:53,800 --> 00:14:54,619
a lot?
221
00:14:54,620 --> 00:14:55,840
No, never.
222
00:14:57,500 --> 00:15:02,680
Well, it certainly is a beautiful house.
I'm sorry I missed the tour.
223
00:15:04,060 --> 00:15:06,880
Well, maybe later I could give you a
private tour.
224
00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:11,970
Well, it looks like I've seen just about
everything.
225
00:15:13,640 --> 00:15:16,950
I just want you to know, I've never done
anything like this before.
226
00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:19,870
Well, you should. You could charge a lot
more for the tour.
227
00:15:21,520 --> 00:15:25,200
Oh, this is so nice. I just don't want
it to end.
228
00:15:25,540 --> 00:15:26,620
How long can you stay?
229
00:15:26,621 --> 00:15:30,599
Oh, well, you know, I've got to be back
at work on Monday, so... Well, when can
230
00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:31,650
I see you again?
231
00:15:31,651 --> 00:15:34,639
I don't know. Maybe next weekend,
weekend after that. It's just, you know,
232
00:15:34,640 --> 00:15:36,879
too expensive to go back and forth all
the time.
233
00:15:36,880 --> 00:15:40,619
Hey, maybe come to Cleveland sometime
and, you know, stay at my place. See how
234
00:15:40,620 --> 00:15:41,980
people lived 50 years ago.
235
00:15:43,280 --> 00:15:47,040
I have to work six days a week. I just
don't see how I could.
236
00:15:49,440 --> 00:15:53,519
I really want to believe that this is
more than just a fling. It just feels
237
00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:56,410
wrong to be talking about a weekend
here, a weekend there.
238
00:15:56,440 --> 00:15:58,120
I know, but what are we going to do?
239
00:15:59,780 --> 00:16:03,940
You could always take some time off work
and come stay with me.
240
00:16:04,720 --> 00:16:06,220
What do you mean, like move in?
241
00:16:06,740 --> 00:16:08,320
Am I moving too fast for you?
242
00:16:08,321 --> 00:16:11,859
You're the one that put I want to get
married on a beer bottle and floated it
243
00:16:11,860 --> 00:16:12,940
down the Mississippi.
244
00:16:14,460 --> 00:16:21,239
I mean, yeah, why not? I mean, we got a
lot in common. We get along really
245
00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:22,290
great.
246
00:16:23,840 --> 00:16:24,890
Yeah.
247
00:16:25,600 --> 00:16:26,650
Yeah, let's do it.
248
00:16:27,700 --> 00:16:28,750
Wow.
249
00:16:29,220 --> 00:16:32,050
I can't wait to tell my friends I'm
moving in with Willie.
250
00:16:43,040 --> 00:16:45,700
Well, look who's finally back from his
private tour.
251
00:16:46,100 --> 00:16:47,540
Yeah, how did it go?
252
00:16:47,541 --> 00:16:49,259
Great, I'm moving in with her.
253
00:16:49,260 --> 00:16:51,400
What? Are you crazy? After one day?
254
00:16:51,401 --> 00:16:53,099
Yeah, I know, I'm freaking out.
255
00:16:53,100 --> 00:16:55,959
I threw up on the way over here. I mean,
I was on Bourbon Street and everybody
256
00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:58,610
was throwing up, but I was the only one
that was sober.
257
00:16:59,160 --> 00:17:01,990
Drew, if you don't want to move in with
her, just tell her.
258
00:17:02,730 --> 00:17:08,030
What? And ruin my last chance at ha...
Happiness?
259
00:17:10,089 --> 00:17:14,089
Trust your instincts. If something
doesn't feel right, it probably isn't.
260
00:17:14,090 --> 00:17:18,289
Yeah, yeah, you're probably right, but
ever since I got here, it's going so
261
00:17:18,290 --> 00:17:19,650
well. It's been so easy.
262
00:17:20,030 --> 00:17:21,080
So easy, huh?
263
00:17:21,390 --> 00:17:24,700
Maybe you finally got the rock to the
top of the hill, you big idiot.
264
00:17:26,050 --> 00:17:27,130
I don't know what to do.
265
00:17:27,150 --> 00:17:29,010
Just don't do anything you'll regret.
266
00:17:31,680 --> 00:17:32,820
Well, I gotta think.
267
00:17:33,120 --> 00:17:34,170
Get some fresh air.
268
00:17:34,900 --> 00:17:35,950
Now?
269
00:17:35,951 --> 00:17:38,339
Because we're gonna go out and get
hammered on hurricanes to go to some
270
00:17:38,340 --> 00:17:39,339
clubs.
271
00:17:39,340 --> 00:17:41,300
Well, I can do two things at once.
272
00:17:46,900 --> 00:17:47,950
Hey, Lily.
273
00:17:48,540 --> 00:17:49,590
Oh, hi, honey.
274
00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:53,980
Why, who's this Yankee that speaks so
familiar with our foul Lily?
275
00:17:53,981 --> 00:17:58,999
Why don't you can it, kid? I'm not in
the mood, all right?
276
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:03,459
Kid? What? Not now, Billy. I'll have you
know I'm a colonel in the Army of the
277
00:18:03,460 --> 00:18:06,770
Confederacy, and I will not be addressed
with such impertinence.
278
00:18:12,760 --> 00:18:14,690
There. The North wins again. Two for
two.
279
00:18:23,640 --> 00:18:25,360
You seem tense.
280
00:18:25,860 --> 00:18:26,910
Is everything okay?
281
00:18:27,360 --> 00:18:29,000
No, not really. Listen, I...
282
00:18:29,001 --> 00:18:32,289
I think I made a mistake. There's no way
I can just pack everything up and move
283
00:18:32,290 --> 00:18:34,150
away from Cleveland. I'm really sorry.
284
00:18:35,130 --> 00:18:36,180
Oh.
285
00:18:36,630 --> 00:18:37,680
Well.
286
00:18:38,090 --> 00:18:39,170
I'm sorry to hear that.
287
00:18:40,130 --> 00:18:43,680
Yeah, I mean, you're so great. I just
wish you lived closer to Cleveland.
288
00:18:43,710 --> 00:18:44,760
You mean that?
289
00:18:44,850 --> 00:18:45,900
Yeah, of course I do.
290
00:18:45,930 --> 00:18:47,850
Well, maybe I should move to Cleveland.
291
00:18:50,530 --> 00:18:51,580
Relax, Drew.
292
00:18:52,290 --> 00:18:53,790
That's just calling you bluff.
293
00:18:54,070 --> 00:18:55,830
I think I know what's going on here.
294
00:18:56,710 --> 00:18:58,510
I think you're afraid of being happy.
295
00:18:59,649 --> 00:19:01,230
No, I'm afraid of dying.
296
00:19:02,830 --> 00:19:04,450
I'm afraid there's no afterlife.
297
00:19:04,630 --> 00:19:07,460
I'm afraid of being called up on stage
to help a magician.
298
00:19:09,410 --> 00:19:11,450
But happiness, I'm not afraid of.
299
00:19:13,170 --> 00:19:14,220
I don't buy it.
300
00:19:14,221 --> 00:19:18,489
I think you're so used to disappointment
in life. It's just easier to stick with
301
00:19:18,490 --> 00:19:19,540
what you know.
302
00:19:25,930 --> 00:19:26,980
Goodbye, Drew.
303
00:19:27,590 --> 00:19:29,510
I hope you find what you're looking for.
304
00:19:31,250 --> 00:19:34,090
Good morning, and welcome to the
Devereaux house.
305
00:19:34,310 --> 00:19:36,990
It was built by William Devereaux in
1839.
306
00:19:37,450 --> 00:19:41,470
The Devereaux family made their fortune
in rice, cotton, and sugar cane.
307
00:19:41,930 --> 00:19:46,070
They began to export it to Europe in
1842. What are you doing?
308
00:19:46,071 --> 00:19:50,609
I'm showing you who's afraid of
happiness. Well, where are we going?
309
00:19:50,610 --> 00:19:52,530
I'm taking you to Cleveland, Miss Lily.
310
00:19:54,470 --> 00:19:56,650
Shining jewel on the majestic Cuyahoga.
311
00:19:57,040 --> 00:19:58,090
Laughter.
312
00:20:41,770 --> 00:20:43,390
I'm not the same man that left you.
313
00:20:44,610 --> 00:20:47,750
I've seen the horrors of Antietam and
Gettysburg.
314
00:20:47,800 --> 00:20:52,350
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