Original subtitles

It's just like my daughter to keep me waiting while she dawdles in the ladies'

room.

So, Kimber, how far I'm going under your supervision?

Uh, look, I gotta be honest with you. Now, don't, don't, uh, don't panic, stay

calm. She's, she's on the ledge right behind you.

Oh, yes.

So she is.

Look, it just encourages her.

Don't turn away!

I've got to think there's a woman out there!

Oh, God!

Don't worry, Carrie.

These displays are a common occurrence with Milan. Trust me, those are her

favorite shoes.

She won't jump.

Well, I'm not just going to stand here and do nothing.

You know, sir, I had an aunt who used to say, I'm going to kill myself, I'm

going to kill myself.

She hyped it up so much that when she finally did it, nobody cared.

Nobody loves.

They'll just encourage him.

energy calling me back where it comes from it's such a crude

attitude it's back where it belongs all the little chicks with the

crimson lips go cleveland rock cleveland rock living in sin with a safety

pin gun

Hey, you're just in time. I was about to have a late lunch. You want to join me?

Actually, I brought lunch for you.

What? Dad caught some fish off the pier, and he smoked one for us.

And here's your half.

Oh, that's nice of him.

Oh, uh, there's a note, too.

Dear Drew, since you're too lazy to get your ass off the couch and go fishing

yourself, I sent you one.

Love, Dad.

Honey?

Love is written in a different color ink, and it's your handwriting.

Well, he meant love.

This is typical.

Creases on your fish.

Hey, what the hell?

This is the Winford Lauder newsletter.

This is the one I sent him announcing my promotion.

See, you never heard from him when he got it, so now you know he got it.

He wrapped a fish in it.

Sorry, Drew.

Hey, Drew.

Hey.

Hey, where have you been all day? You know we're supposed to meet with those

people from Chapa Sportswear?

Oh, sorry. But on the way in, I heard about this cool new roller coaster at

Cedar Point.

So I bribed this guy to open the park, and we rode it like 15 times.

We? Who's we?

I'm leaving, but my angel can never look hideous to me.

How about the monster from Aliens? How'd that look to you?

You know, I'm an alcoholic. I'm no stranger to vomiting.

But today I set new personal marks in both distance and velocity.

Good afternoon, everybody.

Good Lord, Wick, you're white even for an Englishman.

I understand you weren't at the chopper meeting this morning. I was riding a

roller coaster.

Ah, very good.

This is what I get for marrying a supermodel.

You want to know why I wasn't at this meeting this morning?

Because even if I tried my best and did a great job, it wouldn't make any

difference to you. Nothing I do is ever good enough for you.

The only reason nothing you ever do is good enough for me is because nothing

ever do is good...

you take a modicum of interest in the family business.

You know, dear, in this country, they have a term for people like you.

Let me see. How do they put it?

I'm sorry, dear, but you're fired.

Hey, everybody!

Blondesburg can!

Hey,

okay, fine.

I'm leaving.

Oh, and Father, thanks for humiliating me in front of all of these people.

I know you're just being sarcastic, but seriously, things like this really break

up our day.

Oh, Milan, you want me to be proud of you, but you've given me nothing to be

proud about.

Wait a minute, Lord Mercer.

I don't think you should fire her. You should give her another chance.

What? Are you out of your mind, Karen?

He'll put a 19 -year -old girl in charge of a whole department store and expect

her to get everything in just a couple of weeks.

Why do you care so much about this, Karen?

I don't know. I just think you should give her a second chance.

Oh, dear Lord, please do not forsake her.

Oh, very well, Carrie. Let it never be said I'm not an encouraging father.

My daughter is president again.

And I'm sure this time it'll go really well.

Trust me.

Come on, who's with me?

We don't like her just because she's rich?

What are you, a lousy bunch of Democrats?

Come on in, guy.

My house is your house.

Don't touch anything.

I know your co -workers are animals. I can't believe they peed in your gas tank

just because you defended Malav.

Hey, hurry up, Oswald.

Let's get to the worst part. I've got to be home by 10.

Is Lewis coming?

No, he's taking a nap.

They had him in the cloning department counting sheep all day.

For some reason, he came home, went right to sleep.

Well, let me put my homework in the fridge so that we can get out of here.

That's your homework?

Yeah, it's a human liver.

I've been having trouble in anatomy class, and my professor gave it to me so

could study all the different parts.

So you're two grown men living in the park alone with body parts in your

I know nothing!

You know, I've got to hand it to you, Oswald. You're working really hard at

becoming a nurse. I admire your dedication.

Oh, thanks.

Hey, you want to throw it up against the wall? It's really cool the way it kind

of walks its way down.

That is so gross.

But if you ever get a hold of a stomach, I wouldn't mind filling it up with

water and tossing it into cars.

Bye.

Thanks. I'll just have a ginger ale.

What is that, some kind of sick joke?

I'm serious. My stomach doesn't feel too good.

What did you eat today?

Let's see. Breakfast, I had the usual, venison jerky and a caramel apple.

Oh.

For lunch, I had cotton candy, Cornish game hen, and a box of screaming yellow

zonkers.

For dinner, I had... Does anybody know where my liver is?

Liver. I had liver for dinner.

Liver.

It's delicious.

Wherever you got it, you should chop there from now on.

for a supermarket.

missing the point here. I'm a cannibal.

It's okay. Calm down.

Look, you're not the first person who's done this. Remember that movie we saw

about the plane crash in the Andes? Oh, come on. Please.

It's one thing if you're lost in a blizzard starving to death. It's

you just want something to nibble on during jeopardy.

Sorry, buddy.

So, uh, is it true?

What? Do we taste like chicken?

I'm a monster.

Hi, I'm supposed to meet Drew.

What is the matter with him?

Uh, he's kind of freaked out because he ate human flesh.

Now how am I going to do my homework? Do it!

Well,

I'm off to the morgue to get another human liver.

Have a seat. What do you want to talk to me about?

Um, well, I just wanted you to be the first to know I'm quitting.

What? You can't do that. I put my job on the line for you.

I really appreciate all your help, but my dad's right.

I'm a screw -up. I can't run a store.

Look, no one said this was going to be easy, but you can't give up.

No matter what he says about you not being good enough, you have to show our

that you are.

Did you say our dad?

No.

I said, your dad.

But that's interesting that that's what you heard.

Whatever. I still don't know how to run a store.

Well, sometimes you just have to go with things you're good at. What are you

good at?

Well, I know a lot about parties.

Let's see, dressing cool, cute boys, how to christen a yacht.

Castles to rent in France, you know.

I once got upgraded to a suite at Red Roof Inn.

Isn't it weird that we're both people?

Let's go with parties. How about that?

Yeah, what if I made shopping at Winford Ladder fun?

Like a party.

happened? Well, when she said party, I thought she was people walking around

with party hats.

You know, on their heads.

Yeah, you're not.

And for a while, there's the only store in the city carrying this exclusive line

of shoes.

So our fairy tale ends.

And the princess goes back to her castle.

And the little pig that couldn't takes a nice hot bath with a toaster.

I'm sorry I let you down, Drew.

Do you think they're going to fire you?

That could be.

Well, I don't know if it makes you feel any better, but if worse comes to worse,

you could always come live with me in our summer house on the coast of Spain.

mean... You might not get your own room because a bunch of my girlfriends always

hang out, but it's the best I can offer.

Wait a minute. This was an option all along?

Hey.

Hey, have you had a look at today's sales receipts?

I'm sorry. I was making fudge and telling secrets at a beach house in

The sales receipts.

This was the biggest day in the history of the store.

You're kidding.

Oh, my God. They weren't stealing stuff. They were buying it.

Hey, I think we're on to something. Our stuff sells better in the dark.

True.

We did it.

You did it. I can't wait to keep looking at that face.

Burn. Sure is cold out here outside with a hug.

Haunted in here with Drew in the hug, isn't it?

I don't get it. What are you going to say in this one?

I don't know. All I know is I can't sleep at night. I feel so guilty.

I mean, I ate her husband's liver.

I know you want to do something nice for her. You're a good person.

You know, most guys would just eat a person's liver and... You're a good

Oh, hey, I think that's her.

Oh, good luck, buddy.

Hi. You must be Mrs. Bishop. Yes. You're Louis?

Yeah, yeah. Thanks for coming down. Oh, thank you.

Uh, as I said on the phone, I knew your husband.

Yeah.

Did you, did you work with him?

Yes. Yes, I did. Oh.

What do you do at NASA?

I'm the guy who counts down from ten.

Anyway, I just wanted you to know how bad I feel about, you know, everything.

I liked him a lot.

He was tough, but he was good.

Well, thank you, but I'm still not sure why you called me down here.

I really can't explain why. I just feel like I have to do something nice for

you, you know, I mean, for his family.

So if there's anything I can do to make you feel better, you know, it would

really make me feel great.

Well, we don't have a lot of money, and...

He did have a last request?

Anything. Anything at all.

He always wanted to be buried at sea.

I did it yesterday.

You did?

Yes. First thing in the morning.

Sun was coming up. It was beautiful.

I hope you said a prayer.

Oh, yeah. I uttered the name of God a few times.

Back off, pig. I didn't sleep.

Oh, that's right. I forgot you hunt at night.

I didn't get home till four in the morning because of that stupid rave.

baby started crying and I didn't get to bed till five.

At which point your husband started crying.

That's a good one.

Why don't you tell it tonight to your stained, rumpled publicity photo of

Roberts?

Look at you.

Well, you know, I am the president of a successful department store.

Yeah, boy, you look like a million bucks.

I'm sorry I just insulted you, didn't I?

Morning. Well, I see the store is still standing.

Yes, thanks to your daughter here, we had the highest grossing sales day in

history of Whitford Butter.

Yes, I heard you turned the store into a rave.

Yeah, yeah, it was all her idea. I was just the old guy lurking in the shadows

watching your daughter.

Well, I don't approve of raves.

What? No, it's undignified. Not the sort of image this store should be trying to

cultivate. But you wanted me to do a good job and I improved sales, didn't I?

But at what cost? No, no, I'm disappointed. I'm very disappointed.

Damn it.

Is nothing good enough for you?

We work and we work.

Slave of the way in a crummy little cubicle.

And when we finally get a hit, we finally get a tiny little promotion,

going to kill you to say, good job, Drew.

Er, Milan?

Indeed. We'll talk about this at home, Milan.

Oh, and Drew, next time I'm here, perhaps we'll play a little catch.

Really?

I'm sorry, Milan. You did a great job. You should have said so.

Thanks, Drew.

It's okay.

I know I did a good job.

Yeah, but he doesn't think so.

Well, who cares?

I mean, it just hit me.

I have to stop begging for his approval.

Otherwise, I'll end up some pathetic 40 -year -old woman working in a department

store.

When you said 40 -year -old woman, I knew it was me.

That's okay.

Just think, now that you know, you can stop looking for your father's approval,

right?

Right. Time to move on.

And you just watch. When I do, he's finally going to give me the approval I

always wanted. And then I'll have it.

I'll finally, finally have it.

And then I'll be happy.

Sure you will, Drew.

Tell me about the beach house in Spain again.

is our wedding photo.

Oh, that's nice. I can't believe Bob was ever that young.

Here he is on a boat trip to the Amazon we took right before he died.

By the way, what did he die of? Well, some jungle parasite.

But whatever it was, it laid a lot of eggs in his liver.