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Previously on the Drew Carey Show. They
approved your proposal for the new
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woman's store.
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It's a woman's store. If anybody should
manage it, it should be me.
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You don't know anything about managing a
store.
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Even less about being a woman.
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How was work today?
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Funniest thing happened, though. You
wouldn't believe it.
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Man, I can skate in life. I went insane.
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You're up for some part -time jobs at
Fred's Fireworks. Fred's Fireworks?
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that place blow up last month?
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Yeah, and a lot of new jobs opened up.
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Firecrackers are the birds. What birds?
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Oh, I think they were birds. I couldn't
see their faces, but I heard their
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voices. I think they were up in the
trees. They were making fun of me.
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I can't believe you guys shooting Roman
candles off at each other your first day
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of work.
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Look at me. I'm in a psych ward.
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You're getting hauled off to the Ha Ha
House as an unexpected treat.
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shown up for work. He didn't go to the
Warsaw last night for the beer bust.
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I mean, where could he be?
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Wait a minute.
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Warsaw?
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Beer?
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I know.
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I want a beer.
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I know you're experimenting with
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different eyebrows.
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Why is the salmon browser starting to
smell?
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Maybe aliens took Drew.
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They do have quotas on abductions, just
like motorcycle cops.
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Yeah, if they don't probe the requisite
amount of anuses, it's back to teaching
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high school drama.
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You know what? I'm worried about Drew.
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It's not like him to disappear two days
before the new store is going to open. I
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mean, he's Mr.
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Responsible. President of the
Responsibility Club.
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Speedy, what's the matter?
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I think he's trying to tell us
something.
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Where's Drew, boy?
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Stick to yes or no questions.
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This is very important.
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Is Drew in a situation where we need to
call a specific authority, i .e. the
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FBI, or an international authority like
Interpol?
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Know anything or he's too scared to
talk.
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Look at this.
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Who blew up all the fireworks we were
saving?
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Who's a dummy? Who's a dummy?
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What the hell?
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Give me your gun.
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Fireworks and a parrot that wants a
handgun.
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What the hell went on here?
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Something diabolical.
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Diabolical yet festive.
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All right, Lewis.
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and Oswald go down to the police station
and see if they know anything. I'll
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check the hospitals. We'll meet back
here in two hours.
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Hey, wait a minute.
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Why are you giving orders?
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Fine. What do you want to do, boss?
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All right. First, we need someone to
check out the police stations.
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I'll go on my own.
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Kate, I've got something for you.
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You check out all the hospitals, all
right?
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I'll be back here in 120 minutes.
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will be done.
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I mean, he's going to pay for what you
did to me.
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I don't know if it's right for me to do
this.
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I can't do it. I'm in a straitjacket.
They think I'm violent.
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But every time I break the rules, they
make me wear the electric hat.
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I break the rules too, Earl.
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I'm giving you my pudding.
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I'm going to save the pudding for after
they put on the electric hat.
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If I eat it before, I won't remember.
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Hey!
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Let me see what you got to do. Hold on.
Just a couple more numbers. Just press
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nine now.
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Nine. No, no, that's six. I've been
doing it all day. It's very confusing.
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It's very confusing. Just the nine.
There you go. Nine.
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Nine. Oh, thank you.
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Zero.
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Zero.
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Yes! You did it! You did it!
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Now,
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remember when the English man answers
the phone, you put the phone in my...
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He knows the board are coming over to
check out the new store.
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Doggone it.
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I said to Drew, now that you're a hot
shot manager, you don't need drugs to
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you feel like a big man.
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I said, listen.
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Well, he better get here soon. The board
want to know all the details about the
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big opening, and I don't know any.
Nobody tells me anything.
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The caterers are here at 7.
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9 a .m. the doors open to the media, and
10 a .m. kicks off the big fashion
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show.
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Well, I may ask you to fill in as store
manager.
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Moi? This is so out of the blue, Mr.
Wick. So unorchestrated by me. I'll
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consider that a verbal contract.
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Get that for me, would you, Mimi? If
it's anyone but a man who likes pudding,
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tell him I'm busy.
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Nigel Wick, fun foreigner.
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Hello, hello, hello.
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It's me, old Mike Wick there.
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and he'll be back. He's got the craziest
hours.
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Besides, it's nuts around here. You
know, nuts like when a guy hears birds
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tries to blow them up with firecrackers.
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He's probably gone.
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Who is it, Mimi?
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Oh, hippies from PBS trying to get a
handout.
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This is my only phone call. Mimi,
please.
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For the love of God, if you have an
ounce of humanity in you, you'll...
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I find our buddy here, Drew Carey.
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You may know him as... Yes.
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Yes, we have him here.
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Are you family?
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Hell no.
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Are you crazy?
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The guy got himself locked up in a nut
house.
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He's probably walking a piece of
furniture now.
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So can we see him?
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The only people who get through that
door are family members or patients.
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How can we become patients?
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You can voluntarily admit yourself, but
not just anybody can be a patient. You
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have to see a doctor first.
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We have really good insurance.
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Welcome to the Mary Todd Lincoln Mental
Institute.
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I'm not Larry King, all right?
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Larry King's on TV.
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How can you be on TV and here at the
same time?
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00:08:27,800 --> 00:08:29,360
I taped that show earlier today.
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00:08:30,940 --> 00:08:35,799
All right, if you're Larry King, then
what's Angie Dickinson really like?
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A dynamite lady.
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Ten pounds of glass and a five -pound
sack.
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Hey, buddy.
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Thank God you guys are here. You can get
me out of this place. Is it just me, or
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does Ann Miller have a great set of
gams?
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It's about time.
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What did you get in here? Mimi set me up
so she could take over the store.
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00:08:58,340 --> 00:09:01,559
Alice, you have to get me a lawyer
tonight. Get me out of here by tomorrow.
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00:09:01,560 --> 00:09:04,750
Oh, we can't do that. We checked
ourselves in. We're patients now.
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Look at us, huh?
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The three musketeers.
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We're patients. What the hell were you
thinking?
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Well, we wanted to see you and make sure
you're all right.
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And they wouldn't let us visit because
we're not family. So it was either this
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or wait until tomorrow for non -family
visiting day.
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If your patient's here and you're locked
in here with me, then how are you going
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to get me out?
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Whoops.
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00:10:14,730 --> 00:10:15,780
Quentin and I win.
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00:10:15,890 --> 00:10:17,970
Hey, that's not fair.
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00:10:17,971 --> 00:10:21,709
Where were the psych ward rules when we
were playing Scrabble and my partner ate
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all the vowels?
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00:10:25,330 --> 00:10:27,730
Oh, Drew, you smell awful.
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00:10:27,731 --> 00:10:31,969
Try to sneak out in the garbage truck,
which would have been a lot easier if
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of you would learn to eat your macaroni
and cheese.
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Cheer up, buddy. Look, I drew a picture
of you.
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Do you like it?
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Yeah, that's pretty much me now.
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00:10:53,390 --> 00:10:54,710
I found through the window.
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00:11:00,470 --> 00:11:01,910
Drew! Drew!
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00:11:02,170 --> 00:11:03,290
Drew! Drew!
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00:11:03,670 --> 00:11:04,770
Drew! Drew!
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00:11:05,050 --> 00:11:06,250
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
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00:11:06,251 --> 00:11:06,729
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
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00:11:06,730 --> 00:11:07,849
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
Drew! Drew!
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00:11:07,850 --> 00:11:09,769
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
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00:11:09,770 --> 00:11:10,069
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
Drew! Drew! Drew!
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00:11:10,070 --> 00:11:10,309
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
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00:11:10,310 --> 00:11:10,309
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
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00:11:10,310 --> 00:11:10,309
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
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00:11:10,310 --> 00:11:10,309
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew! Drew!
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Drew!
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00:11:12,290 --> 00:11:13,410
Drew! Drew!
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00:11:14,150 --> 00:11:15,200
Drew!
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00:11:15,250 --> 00:11:16,300
Drew!
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00:11:17,170 --> 00:11:18,220
Drew!
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00:11:18,810 --> 00:11:19,860
Drew!
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So if you're going to give anybody an
angry bath, it should be me.
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So come on, soak me up, you big German
man -woman.
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I like the size of your shoes.
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00:11:42,040 --> 00:11:46,159
All right, but it better be a hard
scrubbing. I'm not fully sane until I'm
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zestfully sane.
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00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:00,690
I'm not like you and Lewis. I wasn't
meant to live like this.
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00:12:02,020 --> 00:12:03,950
I want to help you, buddy. What can I
do?
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00:12:05,460 --> 00:12:06,510
Smuggle me on that.
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00:12:06,720 --> 00:12:07,770
The bald guy?
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00:12:08,620 --> 00:12:09,680
That's a great idea.
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We'll kill him, scoop him out, and then
put you inside him. And then you walk
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00:12:14,100 --> 00:12:15,780
out of here wearing him like a suit.
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00:12:17,060 --> 00:12:20,779
No, no, no. I meant the laundry cart.
Oh, thank God. I didn't want to kill
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00:12:20,780 --> 00:12:22,700
guy. He showed me a picture of his kids.
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00:12:23,621 --> 00:12:29,149
If we get caught, there's no telling
what they'll do to us.
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00:12:29,150 --> 00:12:31,320
Don't worry, buddy. You'd do the same
for me.
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00:12:31,770 --> 00:12:33,350
Yeah. Thanks, Oswald.
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00:12:34,370 --> 00:12:37,930
You know, I kiss you, but it doesn't
take much to get these guys going.
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00:12:47,070 --> 00:12:48,650
Oswald, Lewis, are you here?
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00:12:49,730 --> 00:12:52,200
Damn it, you're supposed to meet me two
hours ago.
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00:13:42,741 --> 00:13:47,789
Stop by Doris' Video World and pick up
Flesh Peddler 3.
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00:13:47,790 --> 00:13:49,840
They'll only hold it for a couple of
days.
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00:14:03,950 --> 00:14:05,000
You know,
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00:14:05,001 --> 00:14:10,429
Drew just wanted to be snuck out on a
laundry cart. He didn't say anything
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00:14:10,430 --> 00:14:11,069
a bomb.
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00:14:11,070 --> 00:14:14,680
Hey, we need a hole big enough to push a
laundry cart through, all right?
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00:14:14,681 --> 00:14:20,339
to break out of a mental institution
once in his life. Don't you want to make
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00:14:20,340 --> 00:14:21,390
special?
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00:14:45,641 --> 00:14:48,879
ingredients from the gardener's shed.
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00:14:48,880 --> 00:14:50,479
Don't they keep that stuff locked up?
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00:14:50,480 --> 00:14:53,100
Well, yeah, duh. It's a mental
institution.
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00:14:53,420 --> 00:14:55,080
Lock up the cotton balls.
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00:14:55,480 --> 00:14:57,940
That's why we lifted the janitor's keys.
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00:14:59,020 --> 00:15:01,740
This is the master key. It opens every
door in the place.
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00:15:03,760 --> 00:15:04,810
Why don't we just...
213
00:15:36,840 --> 00:15:38,180
I'm a good squeezer.
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00:15:38,880 --> 00:15:40,140
That's all I know how to do.
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00:16:29,530 --> 00:16:32,060
Constitution, I'm going to miss your
angry baths.
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00:16:33,970 --> 00:16:35,020
Wait!
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00:16:35,170 --> 00:16:36,220
Wait, come back!
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00:16:37,670 --> 00:16:39,720
I'm in a town! I'm in a bad
neighborhood!
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00:16:41,510 --> 00:16:42,560
Wait!
220
00:16:48,430 --> 00:16:50,610
It's not my fault. It's your fault.
221
00:16:50,970 --> 00:16:54,580
What are you kidding? You're the one
that said Drew was in the back of the
222
00:16:54,790 --> 00:16:57,690
Very good, Miss Murple. You caught an
idiot in a lie. Bravo!
223
00:16:57,691 --> 00:17:02,539
We have to do something. Let's just tell
Woody the truth.
224
00:17:02,540 --> 00:17:06,720
No, we can't do that. Then he'll think
Drew's crazy and he'll lose his new job.
225
00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:08,099
Maybe his old job, too.
226
00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:12,499
So for now, let's just relax, enjoy some
champagne, and see what Milan has to
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00:17:12,500 --> 00:17:13,550
offer this year.
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00:18:11,050 --> 00:18:12,250
She's in my beer company.
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00:18:12,670 --> 00:18:13,720
She's everywhere.
230
00:18:53,100 --> 00:18:54,440
Which one is the real me?
231
00:18:55,060 --> 00:18:57,320
So I'll just kill all of you.
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00:19:04,800 --> 00:19:09,140
I'm afraid Mr. Carey is suffering from
prolonged duress stress disorder.
233
00:19:09,640 --> 00:19:10,840
Oh, that's horrible.
234
00:19:11,540 --> 00:19:12,590
What's it mean?
235
00:19:12,920 --> 00:19:18,420
His hatred for this meanie person has
caused him to lose contact with reality.
236
00:19:18,880 --> 00:19:19,940
Oh, my God.
237
00:19:20,620 --> 00:19:21,920
How long does he have?
238
00:19:24,300 --> 00:19:25,560
from something like this.
239
00:19:26,900 --> 00:19:27,950
Oh.
240
00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:29,180
Then why all the drama?
241
00:19:30,551 --> 00:19:34,519
He's gonna come out of it, though,
right?
242
00:19:34,520 --> 00:19:38,130
We'll do everything we can to help, but
there's really no way of knowing.
243
00:19:38,280 --> 00:19:40,990
Hey, Todd, it looks like he's trying to
say something.
244
00:19:53,710 --> 00:19:54,760
Yes, it is true.
245
00:19:55,650 --> 00:19:57,570
I don't know it's real anymore.
246
00:19:59,210 --> 00:20:00,270
You're real, Drew.
247
00:20:01,870 --> 00:20:06,550
Look in here and say, I believe in me.
248
00:20:06,600 --> 00:20:11,150
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