All language subtitles for The Drew Carey Show s06e11 Fetal Atraction.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:11,270 --> 00:00:13,529 That's what's going on. 2 00:00:13,530 --> 00:00:17,089 You know, after being giant colored eggs last year, I thought the Easter Bunny 3 00:00:17,090 --> 00:00:19,260 was the biggest bastard we ever worked for. 4 00:00:19,261 --> 00:00:23,689 Dan is ten times worse. We can't get away from this guy. He knows when we're 5 00:00:23,690 --> 00:00:26,209 sleeping. He knows when we're awake. He knows when we're reading porn on our 6 00:00:26,210 --> 00:00:27,260 break. 7 00:00:28,870 --> 00:00:30,170 Tough boss. Big deal. 8 00:00:30,680 --> 00:00:32,420 Mr. Wick made me marry him. Top that. 9 00:00:32,421 --> 00:00:37,599 Yeah, but he's really mean to us, Drew. He gets drunk and abusive and makes us 10 00:00:37,600 --> 00:00:38,740 do really awful things. 11 00:00:38,741 --> 00:00:42,479 You know, after a day of kids sitting on him when his lap goes numb, guess who 12 00:00:42,480 --> 00:00:43,530 has to wake it up? 13 00:00:45,300 --> 00:00:48,640 I can't take it anymore, Drew. You gotta fire him. 14 00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:52,779 Sorry. But this time of year, all the good, hopeless alcoholics who work for 15 00:00:52,780 --> 00:00:53,920 minimum wage are taken. 16 00:00:54,840 --> 00:00:57,610 Unless you just stop showing up, I'm not gonna fire him. 17 00:00:58,020 --> 00:01:01,370 Get it! Or should I say... El Stupidor. 18 00:01:01,790 --> 00:01:06,150 Get your sad old man arse into my office now! 19 00:01:06,550 --> 00:01:07,730 Now, now, now! 20 00:01:08,550 --> 00:01:11,320 What were we talking about? Oh, yeah, you got a bad boss. 21 00:01:12,610 --> 00:01:15,620 Can you do me a favor? Roll this into a tube for me, would you? 22 00:01:17,850 --> 00:01:18,900 Thank you. 23 00:01:19,070 --> 00:01:20,120 Now! 24 00:01:23,890 --> 00:01:24,940 Hello, who's this? 25 00:01:25,510 --> 00:01:27,010 Oh, someone from a while away? 26 00:01:27,070 --> 00:01:29,600 And you saw that tube thing coming? I'll be damned. 27 00:01:36,040 --> 00:01:39,410 You shacks of elf crap have been talking about me? No, sir, Senator. 28 00:01:39,540 --> 00:01:40,590 Good. 29 00:01:41,320 --> 00:01:44,160 Now, pick up my keys. 30 00:01:47,140 --> 00:01:48,280 There are no keys there. 31 00:01:48,720 --> 00:01:49,770 Pick them up. 32 00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:54,330 Help him. 33 00:01:57,780 --> 00:02:02,960 I don't ask my elves to love me. I ask them to respect me. 34 00:02:03,671 --> 00:02:10,499 I caught you. You said you knew where to get some sexy maternity underwear? 35 00:02:10,500 --> 00:02:12,840 Yep. I make my own nursing bras. 36 00:02:13,540 --> 00:02:14,590 Really? 37 00:02:17,120 --> 00:02:20,160 A little something for the baby and the daddy. 38 00:02:21,480 --> 00:02:25,460 Wow. Hundreds of beads and sequins right by the baby's mouth. 39 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:27,050 That's great. 40 00:02:27,120 --> 00:02:28,860 Why don't you have some fishhooks? 41 00:02:29,520 --> 00:02:32,020 No, you pull them down. Listen. 42 00:02:39,340 --> 00:02:42,720 No thanks, Mimi, not if yours were the last six breasts on Earth. 43 00:02:44,960 --> 00:02:49,059 Drew, I understand why all your girlfriends make you keep the lights 44 00:02:49,060 --> 00:02:50,680 trust me, there's only two. 45 00:02:52,131 --> 00:02:59,499 Hey, Drew, while I'm here, can you check and see how many days in the hospital 46 00:02:59,500 --> 00:03:01,319 my insurance will cover when I have the baby? 47 00:03:01,320 --> 00:03:02,059 Not that many. 48 00:03:02,060 --> 00:03:04,530 That's why we put a basket under your desk for you. 49 00:03:04,531 --> 00:03:08,949 I'm kidding around. I think your maternity coverage isn't so good here. 50 00:03:08,950 --> 00:03:10,169 your husband's is better. 51 00:03:10,170 --> 00:03:14,630 Oh, I don't have a husband. I have a boyfriend, and he left me. 52 00:03:15,330 --> 00:03:17,970 Wow. Well, that must be so hard. 53 00:03:17,971 --> 00:03:21,809 The most beautiful, important time of your life, you get thrown out like 54 00:03:21,810 --> 00:03:22,890 yesterday's garbage. 55 00:03:23,930 --> 00:03:25,850 I'm alone, too. Does that surprise you? 56 00:03:27,050 --> 00:03:30,429 Hey, when do you do? Oh, about a month. I can't wait. I am so sick of the 57 00:03:30,430 --> 00:03:33,440 backaches and the swollen feet and being tired all the time. 58 00:03:33,441 --> 00:03:35,099 Oh, good thing you're not an elephant. 59 00:03:35,100 --> 00:03:37,839 You know, that's the mammal that's pregnant the longest, 13 months. 60 00:03:37,840 --> 00:03:39,950 Although, you make a pretty hot elephant. 61 00:03:40,980 --> 00:03:42,030 Right back at you. 62 00:03:43,291 --> 00:03:50,199 Hey, uh, would you like to go out to dinner sometime? I was going to ask you 63 00:03:50,200 --> 00:03:52,310 about eight months ago, but you were busy. 64 00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:55,940 Yeah, I'd like that. It's a date. 65 00:03:56,560 --> 00:03:58,060 Ooh, you want to feel a kick? 66 00:03:58,251 --> 00:04:00,159 It's a boy. 67 00:04:00,160 --> 00:04:01,560 Wow. Hey, feel this. 68 00:04:01,561 --> 00:04:03,509 What am I feeling? 69 00:04:03,510 --> 00:04:04,560 I'm a boy too. 70 00:04:41,960 --> 00:04:43,010 Ohio! 71 00:04:43,280 --> 00:04:45,280 Ohio! Ohio! Ohio! Ohio! 72 00:04:58,220 --> 00:05:01,170 Okay, coast is clear. My attention went back to the kitchen. 73 00:05:03,281 --> 00:05:09,469 I don't think we should be doing this. Look, we're just going to keep him in 74 00:05:09,470 --> 00:05:13,140 apartment for a couple of days until Drew fires him for missing work, all 75 00:05:13,141 --> 00:05:16,209 That's the punishment for kidnapping Santa. 76 00:05:16,210 --> 00:05:17,260 Death! 77 00:05:18,490 --> 00:05:21,080 Shut your snow hole, Craig. You're going to burn me! 78 00:05:21,630 --> 00:05:23,890 Oh, crap. 79 00:05:24,410 --> 00:05:26,580 What's Kate doing here this time of night? 80 00:05:26,830 --> 00:05:28,330 Oh, man, she's got to get a life. 81 00:05:52,220 --> 00:05:54,450 The napkin holder picks up your reflection. 82 00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:58,160 It does, doesn't it? Uh -huh. 83 00:05:59,300 --> 00:06:00,680 What do you think of my hair? 84 00:06:00,681 --> 00:06:04,019 I just put highlights in it. I just wanted to do something crazy for the 85 00:06:04,020 --> 00:06:05,070 holidays. 86 00:06:06,280 --> 00:06:07,340 You know, 87 00:06:09,231 --> 00:06:15,419 I was going to get banged, but I thought I would attract attention to my 88 00:06:15,420 --> 00:06:18,079 eyebrows, which between you and me are not my best feature. 89 00:06:18,080 --> 00:06:19,240 Okay, that's enough. 90 00:06:25,930 --> 00:06:26,980 This is Suzanne. 91 00:06:27,010 --> 00:06:28,350 Hey. Hi. 92 00:06:28,850 --> 00:06:29,900 Hi. 93 00:06:30,310 --> 00:06:31,850 How do you two know each other? 94 00:06:33,590 --> 00:06:34,790 Drew and I work together. 95 00:06:35,050 --> 00:06:38,510 Oh, a second there. I thought you were on a date. 96 00:06:39,430 --> 00:06:41,870 We are on a date. 97 00:06:42,090 --> 00:06:43,140 Ew. 98 00:06:45,230 --> 00:06:46,280 I mean, oh. 99 00:06:47,490 --> 00:06:49,750 So she's pregnant. What's the big deal? 100 00:06:50,750 --> 00:06:54,909 By the way, Kate, have you known that the baby isn't mine? I didn't cheat on 101 00:06:54,910 --> 00:06:55,960 you. 102 00:06:56,170 --> 00:06:58,160 You never have the energy to cheat on me. 103 00:06:59,570 --> 00:07:02,460 Remember when we had sex twice in one week? You got the flu. 104 00:07:05,030 --> 00:07:06,970 The dog howls in the midday sun. 105 00:07:11,190 --> 00:07:12,240 There you go. 106 00:07:12,650 --> 00:07:13,700 Mr. Pregnant Lady. 107 00:07:13,830 --> 00:07:15,310 Oh, it's my date, Suzanne. 108 00:07:15,311 --> 00:07:16,189 Mr. Lewis. 109 00:07:16,190 --> 00:07:17,240 Hey. 110 00:07:17,590 --> 00:07:19,690 Oh, my God, Drew. What's next, animals? 111 00:07:22,090 --> 00:07:25,040 You know, I almost forgot I was pregnant and ordered a beer. 112 00:07:25,210 --> 00:07:27,740 Thank you guys for reminding me what that could do. 113 00:07:33,770 --> 00:07:36,720 I'm just going to run to the restroom. Don't you go anywhere. 114 00:07:37,581 --> 00:07:39,569 Who's that? 115 00:07:39,570 --> 00:07:40,650 My date, Suzanne. 116 00:07:41,090 --> 00:07:44,890 Yes, I'm on a date with a pregnant woman. What's wrong with that? Oh, come 117 00:07:44,891 --> 00:07:48,029 Drew. You broke up with Kate because you wanted a family, and now you're dating 118 00:07:48,030 --> 00:07:49,809 a mother -to -be. Don't you think there's some connection? 119 00:07:49,810 --> 00:07:50,860 We're not dating. 120 00:07:51,410 --> 00:07:52,460 It's our first date. 121 00:07:52,461 --> 00:07:55,589 Besides, we really like each other. We have a lot in common. 122 00:07:55,590 --> 00:07:59,149 All right. Besides the fact that she's pregnant, what can you tell us about 123 00:07:59,150 --> 00:08:00,200 Suzanne? 124 00:08:00,870 --> 00:08:01,920 I know she does it. 125 00:08:05,830 --> 00:08:10,309 Look, Drew, I'll admit it. I fantasize about pregnant women while I'm 126 00:08:10,310 --> 00:08:11,410 myself in the shower. 127 00:08:16,990 --> 00:08:19,270 But to pursue it, that's kind of perverted. 128 00:08:20,450 --> 00:08:22,310 I don't know what you're getting into. 129 00:08:22,919 --> 00:08:27,659 Pregnant women are always having mood swings and wild cravings, which is why 130 00:08:27,660 --> 00:08:30,959 here at midnight getting the Warsaw's pickles for Mimi when I have a perfectly 131 00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:32,240 good pickle maker at home. 132 00:08:33,179 --> 00:08:34,500 Just a date. 133 00:08:34,960 --> 00:08:36,640 If it doesn't work out, no big deal. 134 00:08:37,059 --> 00:08:38,109 Not to her. 135 00:08:38,110 --> 00:08:40,999 Dating a pregnant woman is much more serious. She's looking for a father for 136 00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:44,759 baby. No, she's looking for a nice evening out, just like I am. Well, if 137 00:08:44,760 --> 00:08:47,419 end up sleeping with this pregnant lady, let me give you some tips that have 138 00:08:47,420 --> 00:08:48,470 helped Mimi and me. 139 00:08:49,550 --> 00:08:52,670 Gently place Mimi on her side and then hold up her right leg. 140 00:08:52,910 --> 00:08:53,960 Hey, listen to this. 141 00:08:54,630 --> 00:08:57,040 Don't think about this in the shower, you freak. 142 00:08:57,890 --> 00:09:02,749 Get out of these rooms! I'm going to drink your blood and roll around in your 143 00:09:02,750 --> 00:09:03,800 skin! 144 00:09:07,010 --> 00:09:09,810 We have got to change that answering machine method. 145 00:09:13,810 --> 00:09:14,860 Morning, Drew. 146 00:09:16,430 --> 00:09:17,480 Hi, Drew. 147 00:09:17,730 --> 00:09:19,110 Hello, Mr. Carey. 148 00:09:24,750 --> 00:09:28,330 Roses are red, violets are blue, diapers are dirty, and I am too. 149 00:09:31,410 --> 00:09:33,550 What the hell? 150 00:09:35,510 --> 00:09:37,980 Word on the street is you're into pregnant women. 151 00:09:39,550 --> 00:09:41,130 Touch me and you're dead. 152 00:09:43,290 --> 00:09:45,520 I'd only touch you to make sure you were dead. 153 00:09:47,510 --> 00:09:48,950 Hi, Drew. 154 00:09:49,250 --> 00:09:51,170 If it helps, I'm having a boy. 155 00:09:51,510 --> 00:09:52,560 I'm having twins. 156 00:09:52,850 --> 00:09:54,230 I'm having a cesarean. 157 00:09:54,520 --> 00:09:56,200 I'll be open for business in a week. 158 00:09:59,680 --> 00:10:02,320 Oh, oh, oh, oh. I see what's going on here. 159 00:10:02,620 --> 00:10:06,579 You let the bad boys plant the seed, but come harvest time, you can run an old 160 00:10:06,580 --> 00:10:08,140 farmer drew for some stability. 161 00:10:08,540 --> 00:10:13,080 Well, on this farm, I have some self -respect. So E -I -E -I, no. 162 00:10:16,700 --> 00:10:20,550 Baby, what's going on? What are all these women doing hanging around Kerry? 163 00:10:20,740 --> 00:10:23,000 They want him to be the father of their baby. 164 00:10:23,001 --> 00:10:24,869 So sad. 165 00:10:24,870 --> 00:10:27,290 If I was that desperate, I'd just go lesbian. 166 00:10:28,810 --> 00:10:32,690 I mean, at least my kid would know how to throw a ball and please a woman. 167 00:10:35,070 --> 00:10:39,949 Well, if they're so desperate that they'll have Kerry, then a witty 168 00:10:39,950 --> 00:10:43,510 with a twinkle in his eye and one testicle in his pants is sure to send 169 00:10:47,110 --> 00:10:49,450 Oh, God, that was cologne. 170 00:10:55,060 --> 00:10:56,110 Nigel's here. 171 00:10:56,111 --> 00:10:59,019 By the looks of you, you've already made one mistake. How's about making 172 00:10:59,020 --> 00:11:00,070 another? 173 00:11:00,071 --> 00:11:01,599 Oh, 174 00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:05,390 come on. You're already going to hell. How's about a little heaven on the way? 175 00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:10,440 Hi, sweetie. 176 00:11:11,560 --> 00:11:13,000 Where are the presents from? 177 00:11:13,740 --> 00:11:16,460 Janet, Heather, Lisa. 178 00:11:16,571 --> 00:11:18,379 Damn them. 179 00:11:18,380 --> 00:11:20,699 Well, you know, actually, you know, I guess they all heard about me going out 180 00:11:20,700 --> 00:11:23,419 with you, and now they all want to be the father of their kids. Isn't that the 181 00:11:23,420 --> 00:11:24,909 craziest thing you've ever heard in your life? 182 00:11:24,910 --> 00:11:27,850 Well, they have some nerve because you're all mine. 183 00:11:29,410 --> 00:11:31,190 I'm all yours, huh? After one date. 184 00:11:31,870 --> 00:11:34,340 Now I know why women got creeped out when I said it. 185 00:11:36,510 --> 00:11:40,489 Are you talking about other women just to try to make me jealous because we 186 00:11:40,490 --> 00:11:42,530 don't like it, do we, little Drew? 187 00:11:46,070 --> 00:11:47,120 Little Drew? 188 00:11:47,510 --> 00:11:50,160 The only little Drew I know just crawled up inside me. 189 00:11:58,480 --> 00:12:00,780 Maybe we should just slow down. 190 00:12:01,260 --> 00:12:02,760 How can you say that to me? 191 00:12:03,120 --> 00:12:05,040 After all we've been through together. 192 00:12:05,041 --> 00:12:08,519 After all we've been through, this conversation is the most we've been 193 00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:09,570 together. 194 00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:11,480 So you were just toying with me? 195 00:12:11,481 --> 00:12:14,879 You're just some kind of sicko taking advantage of a pregnant woman? I am 196 00:12:14,880 --> 00:12:15,679 a baby! 197 00:12:15,680 --> 00:12:18,919 Shh, you're making us seem here. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It's the hormones. 198 00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:20,780 Sometimes they make me a little crazy. 199 00:12:20,781 --> 00:12:25,328 Good, because you're scaring the hell out of me. 200 00:12:25,329 --> 00:12:27,849 Listen, maybe this isn't the best time for either of us to be starting a 201 00:12:27,850 --> 00:12:28,900 relationship. Yeah? 202 00:12:28,901 --> 00:12:33,049 Well, what is the best time, Drew, when I'm giving birth behind a 7 -Eleven with 203 00:12:33,050 --> 00:12:36,300 only rats to chew through the umbilical cord because I'm alone? 204 00:12:38,130 --> 00:12:39,810 Can we just talk about this later? 205 00:12:39,811 --> 00:12:42,689 What do you mean? Like on a date? Because I'm craving Cantonese food. 206 00:12:42,690 --> 00:12:43,740 Pick me up at 8. 207 00:12:45,521 --> 00:12:47,309 Well, what? 208 00:12:47,310 --> 00:12:49,249 How the hell am I going to get out of this? 209 00:12:49,250 --> 00:12:51,600 I don't want to drive all the way down to Canton. 210 00:13:19,630 --> 00:13:20,680 too, Kate. 211 00:13:20,830 --> 00:13:22,030 We're hiding from Santa. 212 00:13:24,190 --> 00:13:25,570 What are you talking about? 213 00:13:25,571 --> 00:13:28,729 We kidnapped the store Santa so he'd miss work and Drew would have to fire 214 00:13:28,730 --> 00:13:30,110 What? Are you crazy? 215 00:13:30,111 --> 00:13:31,429 You can't do that. 216 00:13:31,430 --> 00:13:35,169 We can and we did and everything was going fine until he escaped. The next 217 00:13:35,170 --> 00:13:38,480 a hostage says he can only go to the bathroom at home, we go with him. 218 00:13:39,370 --> 00:13:42,070 Now Santa's stalking us. He wants to kill us. 219 00:13:42,071 --> 00:13:45,049 And the worst part is when we see him at work on Monday morning, there's going 220 00:13:45,050 --> 00:13:46,670 to be all those awkward silences. 221 00:13:48,840 --> 00:13:51,250 That's why you should never kidnap co -workers. 222 00:13:53,840 --> 00:13:56,670 I guess we can't go back to that all -you -can -eat buffet. 223 00:13:56,671 --> 00:14:00,279 It wasn't an all -you -can -eat buffet. You were eating off other people's 224 00:14:00,280 --> 00:14:01,330 plates. 225 00:14:03,020 --> 00:14:05,100 Right. Thanks for paying their bill. 226 00:14:06,120 --> 00:14:09,899 You know, you are the sweetest guy in the whole world. I don't know what I 227 00:14:09,900 --> 00:14:10,950 do without you. 228 00:14:11,460 --> 00:14:15,639 You know, I think you're stronger than you think you are. There's not anything 229 00:14:15,640 --> 00:14:17,300 that you couldn't do on your own. 230 00:14:17,950 --> 00:14:19,030 Get me a hot chocolate. 231 00:14:19,650 --> 00:14:21,090 Or would want to do on your own. 232 00:14:23,390 --> 00:14:26,810 Man, I am so sick of waiting on Suzanne hand and foot. 233 00:14:27,490 --> 00:14:28,990 What is she doing here anyway? 234 00:14:28,991 --> 00:14:31,869 Well, Steve was right. She took that date way too seriously. 235 00:14:31,870 --> 00:14:36,089 I've been trying to get rid of her all night, but I just can't. I feel bad for 236 00:14:36,090 --> 00:14:37,530 her. You know, she's all alone. 237 00:14:37,590 --> 00:14:40,060 Ah, Tom, how do you break up with a pregnant lady? 238 00:14:40,061 --> 00:14:41,469 I'll tell you what you do. 239 00:14:41,470 --> 00:14:42,830 You do what my dad did. 240 00:14:43,250 --> 00:14:45,930 You take her on a romantic trip across the border. 241 00:14:46,380 --> 00:14:48,670 You plant tequila on her so she gets arrested. 242 00:14:50,220 --> 00:14:52,840 And she has to raise her son in a Mexican prison. 243 00:14:54,960 --> 00:14:56,100 How is your dad anyway? 244 00:14:56,440 --> 00:14:58,060 No tango and pop -up. 245 00:15:04,020 --> 00:15:06,200 Hey, where's my hot chocolate? 246 00:15:06,900 --> 00:15:10,570 I don't know if she's even pregnant anyway. Maybe she's just pushy and fat. 247 00:15:19,340 --> 00:15:20,390 one way to find out. 248 00:15:21,900 --> 00:15:27,440 Oh, my God. He really is after you guys. 249 00:15:27,660 --> 00:15:28,710 Listen to this. 250 00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:32,220 Deck the halls with your stretched out intestines. 251 00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:37,340 Fa -la -la -la -la -la -la. You're dead. 252 00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:40,940 Wait a minute. That sounds familiar. 253 00:15:41,500 --> 00:15:43,120 Oh, it's a Christmas carol. 254 00:15:43,440 --> 00:15:47,379 Deck the halls with your stretched out intestines. Fa -la -la -la -la. You're 255 00:15:47,380 --> 00:15:48,430 dead. 256 00:15:48,531 --> 00:15:55,339 We're not safe here anymore. No. Kate, you're an innocent miss. You should 257 00:15:55,340 --> 00:15:56,760 protected between us. Yes. 258 00:15:57,360 --> 00:15:58,410 Okay. 259 00:16:03,500 --> 00:16:04,550 Take the girl! 260 00:16:05,980 --> 00:16:12,939 Come on, put some 261 00:16:12,940 --> 00:16:14,380 muscle into it, you big girl. 262 00:16:14,381 --> 00:16:18,799 Hey, uh, Suzanne, did you ever notice how we don't really get along? 263 00:16:18,800 --> 00:16:19,639 Don't worry. 264 00:16:19,640 --> 00:16:22,470 There'll be plenty of time to fall in love after I move in. 265 00:16:22,860 --> 00:16:24,940 Move in? What are you talking about? 266 00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:26,250 Oh, God. 267 00:16:26,260 --> 00:16:28,120 Oh, God, I don't feel so good. 268 00:16:28,560 --> 00:16:31,690 Maybe that's because you ate four pork chops and creme brulee. 269 00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:36,740 No. No, I think it's labor. 270 00:16:37,220 --> 00:16:38,660 We have to get to the hospital. 271 00:16:38,661 --> 00:16:40,859 Oh, my God, you're serious. 272 00:16:40,860 --> 00:16:41,959 Oh, yeah, let me get my jacket. 273 00:16:41,960 --> 00:16:45,039 Yeah, take all the time you want, you lazy jackass. This is why you never get 274 00:16:45,040 --> 00:16:46,090 ahead at work. 275 00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:51,030 never told me. How come your other boyfriend dumped you? 276 00:16:55,420 --> 00:16:56,470 Oh, God. 277 00:16:56,471 --> 00:16:58,039 Oh, God, another contraction? 278 00:16:58,040 --> 00:17:02,400 Ah, breathe, Suzanne, breathe. I can't believe you did this to me, you bastard. 279 00:17:04,900 --> 00:17:08,800 I never even had sex with you. I'm getting royally screwed right now, 280 00:17:10,480 --> 00:17:12,240 Hello, how are we doing? 281 00:17:12,720 --> 00:17:15,700 Okay, your contractions are still pretty firm. 282 00:17:17,099 --> 00:17:19,460 We have some time to get your paperwork ready. 283 00:17:19,859 --> 00:17:22,329 I just need the correct spelling of Daddy's name. 284 00:17:22,740 --> 00:17:25,720 Drew Carey, C -A -R... A -Z -Y. 285 00:17:26,119 --> 00:17:29,249 Because you are crazy if you think I'm the father of that child. 286 00:17:29,250 --> 00:17:34,439 He's just a little nervous. Why don't you leave the paperwork with me? 287 00:17:34,440 --> 00:17:35,490 Okie dokie. 288 00:17:35,491 --> 00:17:42,059 Look, just because I know you're not the baby's father, does the whole world 289 00:17:42,060 --> 00:17:43,110 have to know? 290 00:17:43,111 --> 00:17:48,839 Listen, I know you're going through a hard time right now and everything, but 291 00:17:48,840 --> 00:17:52,630 you put my name down as father of this child, that means I'm responsible for 292 00:17:52,660 --> 00:17:55,730 And not just financially, but in all kinds of other ways, too. 293 00:17:55,920 --> 00:17:57,800 And I can't do that after one date. 294 00:17:58,340 --> 00:17:59,390 I'm sorry. 295 00:18:00,540 --> 00:18:02,460 Fine, I'll just scratch it out. 296 00:18:02,461 --> 00:18:03,639 Thank you. 297 00:18:03,640 --> 00:18:07,359 And I would just like to say that even though, in my mind, we are not now, nor 298 00:18:07,360 --> 00:18:10,550 have we ever been dating, I would still like to break up with you. 299 00:18:10,551 --> 00:18:15,209 Hey, I know it's none of my business, but you really shouldn't talk to the 300 00:18:15,210 --> 00:18:18,670 mother of your child like that. Oh, no, he's not the father. 301 00:18:19,350 --> 00:18:20,400 I don't have anyone. 302 00:18:20,550 --> 00:18:21,600 I'm all alone. 303 00:18:22,330 --> 00:18:23,380 My God. 304 00:18:23,850 --> 00:18:26,740 A guy would be an idiot to leave a woman as beautiful as you. 305 00:18:28,110 --> 00:18:31,480 Hey, listen, if you want me to stay while you have the baby... I said I'm 306 00:18:33,730 --> 00:18:34,870 I guess the best man won. 307 00:18:35,490 --> 00:18:36,540 Hi, sweetie. 308 00:18:37,050 --> 00:18:40,000 Come with me to my house. You're dead before you hit the lawn. 309 00:18:41,151 --> 00:18:46,799 Do you really think there's no chance Santa's after us anymore? 310 00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:49,270 He didn't even hurt Kate when we left her for dead. 311 00:18:49,271 --> 00:18:54,459 No, he just called me and said, because of what Santa saw in the Gulf War, he no 312 00:18:54,460 --> 00:18:55,720 longer can be with a woman. 313 00:18:57,431 --> 00:18:59,259 Hey, guys. 314 00:18:59,260 --> 00:19:00,310 Hey. 315 00:19:00,320 --> 00:19:01,370 Where have you been? 316 00:19:01,820 --> 00:19:05,310 I've been at the hospital dumping a woman right before she gave birth. 317 00:19:05,311 --> 00:19:09,739 So, Drew, you can finally admit you just went out with her because she was 318 00:19:09,740 --> 00:19:11,299 pregnant and you want to have a family? 319 00:19:11,300 --> 00:19:14,430 Nope. The only thing I'll admit is that I have bad taste in women. 320 00:19:15,580 --> 00:19:17,540 I think you're forgetting about me. 321 00:19:18,260 --> 00:19:19,820 I certainly have been trying to. 322 00:19:21,360 --> 00:19:24,160 You know, I think we could all use some more beer. 323 00:19:24,161 --> 00:19:27,979 Hey, Lewis, how about you and I go out and get another case? All right. 324 00:19:27,980 --> 00:19:29,540 What do we need a whole case for? 325 00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:32,010 I don't know. 326 00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:34,620 Don't shine the light on my addiction. 327 00:19:38,640 --> 00:19:42,500 Did you hear a noise? 328 00:19:43,780 --> 00:19:50,619 Yeah, just being paranoid. You want to sit on Santa's lap and 329 00:19:50,620 --> 00:19:52,600 tell me how you want to die? 330 00:20:12,750 --> 00:20:19,229 every day over 331 00:20:19,230 --> 00:20:25,409 the river and through the woods for grandma's house we go over 332 00:20:25,410 --> 00:20:31,269 the river and through the woods for grandma's house we go merry christmas 333 00:20:31,270 --> 00:20:35,330 everybody who are you talking to nobody 334 00:20:35,380 --> 00:20:39,930 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 26877

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