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1
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The Queen can go anywhere she likes,
can't she?
2
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Yeah.
3
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Well, obviously she's got a schedule.
4
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What about the castle?
5
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The castle?
6
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A bit early for a drink, isn't it?
7
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What the hell?
8
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What?
9
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What have you got round your neck?
10
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Australian address, isn't it?
11
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Is it battery or mains?
12
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I just knew it.
13
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Just because you choose to dress like
Enoch Powell does not mean to say that
14
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rest of us do.
15
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It makes all your eyes go funny.
16
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I know, it's one of those magic eye
patterns, isn't it?
17
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Hang on, hang on. You have to screw your
eyes up like this. I'm really
18
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concentrating.
19
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I've got it, I've got it.
20
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It's two hedgehogs mating in a bath full
of fairy lights.
21
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Briggs, look.
22
00:02:03,520 --> 00:02:04,960
This must be a record.
23
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Five past nine and already you're at
each other's throats.
24
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Wouldn't go too near his throat, sir.
25
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Get radiation burned.
26
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Good God, Briggs.
27
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What's that round your neck?
28
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All right, all right. Come on.
29
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Get it all out of your system.
30
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Mains or batteries?
31
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This way.
32
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Look at you both.
33
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It's like looking at the pages of a
1950s Littlewoods menswear catalogue.
34
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up to the 90s. Say hello to Cullen.
35
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Dare to wear the clothes that suit your
mood.
36
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If I was in that mood, I wouldn't wear
the tie. I'd hang myself with it.
37
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For your information, this tie costs
more than your
38
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whole suit. What? A fiver?
39
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Can we change the subject?
40
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What's in the box?
41
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Take a look for yourself.
42
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It's been with the British Museum for
years, but the Indians want it back.
43
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A representative of the Comanche Nation
is flying over from America.
44
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To pick it up himself.
45
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Why don't we just post it?
46
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It's obvious, Mum.
47
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If it got lost in a post, they might
soon.
48
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And why have we got it anyway?
49
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Why don't you put it down, Louis?
50
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It looks just like Harry Seacombe,
doesn't it? Put it down, Louis!
51
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So, er... Is this your first time in the
country, is it?
52
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Under your order, you know, cos they
were going to send a minicab. You know
53
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they're like.
54
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A bunch of cowboys.
55
00:04:05,380 --> 00:04:08,800
Look, it's a lot of mumbo -jumbo got up
by the post office.
56
00:04:09,300 --> 00:04:14,059
Honestly, they get a whiff of a 2 ,000
-year -old Indian curse and suddenly
57
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you've got a strike on your hands.
58
00:04:15,800 --> 00:04:20,838
And this curse affects anybody who
actually touches the carving, sir? There
59
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isn't a curse.
60
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It's a perfectly normal road accident.
61
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What road accident?
62
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I shouldn't have said anything.
63
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Come on, sir, what road accident?
64
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The post office van that was taking the
thing to Gatwick.
65
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Crashed. It was perfectly routine.
66
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Clear road.
67
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Normal sort of day.
68
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Experienced delivery driver.
69
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What happened to this experienced
delivery driver?
70
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We'll know more when they get the rest
of him out of the hay baler.
71
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What?
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after what happened they thought it best
that we keep hold of it until one of
73
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their medicine men could come and
collect it in person good I'm going for
74
00:05:04,840 --> 00:05:05,890
of tea
75
00:05:25,390 --> 00:05:26,440
Why, small.
76
00:05:28,130 --> 00:05:29,180
No.
77
00:05:33,890 --> 00:05:37,070
I wonder what the great spirit of the
Comanches will do to you.
78
00:05:37,830 --> 00:05:40,600
I mean, there'd be no point scalping
you, would there?
79
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Post office vans crash every day.
80
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Absolutely, Bob. I've never seen one do
less than 70 mile an hour. They deliver
81
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them with dent, but they haven't the
trouble.
82
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I reckon he had a heart attack at the
wheel.
83
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He died of pure terror.
84
00:06:00,230 --> 00:06:01,430
It's now sugar.
85
00:06:02,030 --> 00:06:08,829
And yet, you press the button marked
with
86
00:06:08,830 --> 00:06:09,880
sugar.
87
00:06:10,830 --> 00:06:11,880
That's it.
88
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That's the curse.
89
00:06:14,730 --> 00:06:17,570
That's the curse of the untweeted...
90
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