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1
00:00:00,208 --> 00:00:02,209
nny...
2
00:00:04,337 --> 00:00:06,380
That was well brought up.
Too bad you weren't.
3
00:00:07,840 --> 00:00:09,008
Those are cart farts.
4
00:00:13,680 --> 00:00:15,305
Oh! There's one knocking.
5
00:00:24,023 --> 00:00:25,483
Guess what?
Chicken butt.
6
00:00:29,696 --> 00:00:31,947
What is your guys'
fascination with farts?
7
00:00:37,370 --> 00:00:38,413
Fuck!
8
00:00:38,538 --> 00:00:41,249
Sorries.
9
00:00:42,709 --> 00:00:44,752
Fuck.
10
00:01:10,319 --> 00:01:12,738
Glen came by the produce stand
wanting some plants today.
11
00:01:12,738 --> 00:01:14,240
Is that his way
of asking for weed?
12
00:01:14,240 --> 00:01:17,077
There's no way Glen smokes
the sublime ragtime.
13
00:01:17,202 --> 00:01:18,369
That's kinda hard to imagine,
14
00:01:18,369 --> 00:01:19,871
a man of the cloth smoking
a devil's dart.
15
00:01:19,871 --> 00:01:22,624
I don't smoke weed anymore.
Or any less.
16
00:01:22,624 --> 00:01:24,167
But what did he want?
Azaleas.
17
00:01:24,292 --> 00:01:25,919
I got a friend Kayla
sells Azaleas.
18
00:01:26,044 --> 00:01:27,253
Westphalia Azaleas.
19
00:01:27,253 --> 00:01:28,712
Could she mail ya an Azalea?
20
00:01:28,712 --> 00:01:30,172
Well, I told him
that Azaleas grow wild
21
00:01:30,172 --> 00:01:32,092
down by the river
on the Azalea banks.
22
00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:33,259
You could always
go down a side road
23
00:01:33,259 --> 00:01:34,761
and get 'em
on the honor system
24
00:01:34,761 --> 00:01:36,428
at the end of the lane way
to the Mennonapper's house.
25
00:01:36,428 --> 00:01:38,264
That, and there's a Dutch napper
Iggy, he's got 'em.
26
00:01:38,264 --> 00:01:40,432
Oh, that's right.
Iggy Azaleas.
27
00:01:40,432 --> 00:01:42,143
Yup. He used to have
a shop in St. Jacob's too.
28
00:01:42,268 --> 00:01:43,602
Named it after
his son Brandons.
29
00:01:43,727 --> 00:01:45,396
That's right.
Brandon Flowers.
30
00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:47,899
What'd Glen want Azaleas for?
31
00:01:47,899 --> 00:01:49,274
Says he got
a part-time gig
32
00:01:49,274 --> 00:01:52,028
managing the Letterkenny
cable access TV studio,
33
00:01:52,028 --> 00:01:53,278
wants to do
some decorating.
34
00:01:53,278 --> 00:01:55,072
Does anyone even use that?
35
00:01:55,072 --> 00:01:56,825
I seem to remember
a dude named Jono,
36
00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:59,034
had himselfs a visions.
37
00:01:59,034 --> 00:02:00,953
You're gonna wanna
nuke that, big brother.
38
00:02:01,078 --> 00:02:02,789
Late for fuckin' steak night.
39
00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:05,499
Nukes a steaks?
Berta beef, no less.
40
00:02:05,624 --> 00:02:07,334
Gordon Ramsay'd
fucking spit.
41
00:02:07,459 --> 00:02:09,045
He's a good guy.
He's a real good guy.
42
00:02:09,045 --> 00:02:10,838
He's a great guy,
but he's a hair guy.
43
00:02:11,839 --> 00:02:12,798
What's a hair guy?
44
00:02:12,798 --> 00:02:14,092
Well, a guy with hair, likely.
45
00:02:14,092 --> 00:02:16,802
A guy who spends
too much time on his hair.
46
00:02:16,802 --> 00:02:19,139
Oh, yeah. Ramsay's a hair guy.
47
00:02:19,139 --> 00:02:20,682
Look, Ramsay
cooks a great steak,
48
00:02:20,807 --> 00:02:22,683
great quail,
stews and what have you.
49
00:02:22,808 --> 00:02:24,226
It's like you wanna
like him and everything,
50
00:02:24,226 --> 00:02:26,312
but every time you look at him,
all you can think about is
51
00:02:26,312 --> 00:02:28,272
him Biebering into the mirror
fuckin' with his hair
52
00:02:28,272 --> 00:02:30,315
to make it stand up like that.
He'd be like,
53
00:02:30,315 --> 00:02:33,444
"This is fucking rotten!"
54
00:02:36,446 --> 00:02:38,158
Pull your
finger outta your ass.
55
00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:39,951
"You say the food's great,
56
00:02:39,951 --> 00:02:41,118
"people love it.
57
00:02:41,118 --> 00:02:44,789
"I am shitting myself,
you fucking twat!"
58
00:02:46,415 --> 00:02:47,666
"No!
59
00:02:47,666 --> 00:02:49,836
"I am not here to tell you
not to put raw onions
60
00:02:49,836 --> 00:02:51,879
"in the fucking
French onion soup,
61
00:02:52,004 --> 00:02:53,964
"you fucking useless bell end!"
62
00:02:57,218 --> 00:02:59,636
Hmm? Choosing a hairstyle
is complicated.
63
00:02:59,636 --> 00:03:01,181
No, it isn't.
It isn't?
64
00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:03,349
You get it wet,
then you let it dry.
65
00:03:03,349 --> 00:03:05,183
So first,
you comes in lates for suppers
66
00:03:05,183 --> 00:03:06,268
and now we gotta
listens to you
67
00:03:06,393 --> 00:03:08,021
slagging a true
culinary artisans?
68
00:03:08,021 --> 00:03:09,355
I'm sorry I'm late for supper.
69
00:03:09,355 --> 00:03:10,439
Yeah, why were you late?
70
00:03:10,439 --> 00:03:11,857
Too much chorin' to do.
71
00:03:11,857 --> 00:03:14,027
No more than any other year,
last time I checked.
72
00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:15,486
Mmm. Berta beef, no less.
73
00:03:15,486 --> 00:03:17,779
It's 'cause every farmer
with an acreage or an operation
74
00:03:17,905 --> 00:03:19,199
inside two townships
75
00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:22,201
is callin' me for advice on this
or help with that, fuck.
76
00:03:22,201 --> 00:03:24,703
Like who?
McMurray calls me not once,
77
00:03:24,828 --> 00:03:26,164
not twice,
78
00:03:26,164 --> 00:03:27,373
but thrice a day.
79
00:03:27,373 --> 00:03:28,624
McMurray's a piece of shit.
80
00:03:28,624 --> 00:03:30,667
When a friend asks
for help, you help him.
81
00:03:30,667 --> 00:03:31,878
Just tell him you're busy.
82
00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:35,213
When a friend asks
for help, you help him.
83
00:03:35,213 --> 00:03:36,548
Good buddies.
Squirrelly Dan.
84
00:03:36,548 --> 00:03:38,885
Glen came by earlier
looking for Azaleas.
85
00:03:38,885 --> 00:03:40,177
Well, tell him
to go Iggy Azaleas.
86
00:03:40,177 --> 00:03:41,219
Or Azalea banks.
87
00:03:41,219 --> 00:03:43,139
Is Brandon Flowers still open?
88
00:03:43,139 --> 00:03:44,515
He was looking
for flowers to decorate
89
00:03:44,515 --> 00:03:46,725
the Letterkenny
cable access TV studios.
90
00:03:46,725 --> 00:03:49,062
You're better to go
Iggy Azaleas for interiors.
91
00:03:49,062 --> 00:03:51,814
You should start yourself up
an agricultural consulting show.
92
00:03:51,939 --> 00:03:52,940
You know,
people can call you up,
93
00:03:53,065 --> 00:03:54,691
you devotes an hour
a week to taking calls,
94
00:03:54,691 --> 00:03:55,944
helping people out
with their problems,
95
00:03:56,069 --> 00:03:57,070
and then you got it licked,
96
00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,195
and you have
the rest of the week
97
00:03:58,195 --> 00:03:59,237
to do
your own chorin's.
98
00:03:59,363 --> 00:04:01,073
Yeah. We could help you out,
good buddy.
99
00:04:01,073 --> 00:04:02,407
Well, how would
you get the word out?
100
00:04:02,407 --> 00:04:04,034
Well, you put it
on your fucking Facebook.
101
00:04:04,034 --> 00:04:05,370
Fuck Facebook.
102
00:04:05,370 --> 00:04:06,371
You wanna know what?
103
00:04:07,621 --> 00:04:08,539
Yeah, all right.
104
00:04:10,457 --> 00:04:11,668
McMurray's a piece
of shit.
105
00:04:12,626 --> 00:04:13,962
I am as God made me.
106
00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:15,755
Your shirt's too small,
is all I'm saying.
107
00:04:15,755 --> 00:04:17,882
Presentlys.
So...
108
00:04:17,882 --> 00:04:18,967
I heard youse are starting
109
00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:20,801
your own agricultural
consulting show
110
00:04:20,926 --> 00:04:23,805
'cause apparently
I call youse too much.
111
00:04:23,930 --> 00:04:24,931
Did you say that?
112
00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:26,724
I added some smirk emojis.
113
00:04:26,724 --> 00:04:29,269
Well, I'll have youse know
114
00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:31,813
that I, McMurray, am
the most resilient farmer
115
00:04:31,938 --> 00:04:33,397
inside of two townships
116
00:04:33,397 --> 00:04:36,149
and I'm gonna prove it
by starting my own call-in show.
117
00:04:36,274 --> 00:04:37,484
Well, time's
a bit tight here,
118
00:04:37,609 --> 00:04:38,861
so maybe just do it
after ours?
119
00:04:38,986 --> 00:04:40,195
I was already gonna.
120
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:42,614
Ooh. Not exactly
121
00:04:42,614 --> 00:04:44,241
The Dini Petty Show
in here is it?
122
00:04:44,241 --> 00:04:45,493
Yeah, Glen,
123
00:04:45,618 --> 00:04:47,077
your studio's
a bit of a holler.
124
00:04:47,077 --> 00:04:48,121
Okay. It's one thing
when I say it,
125
00:04:48,246 --> 00:04:49,496
but I don't love it
when you say it.
126
00:04:49,621 --> 00:04:51,457
It beats
the Franks D'Angelo shows.
127
00:04:51,457 --> 00:04:53,084
Nothing beats Jonovision.
128
00:04:53,084 --> 00:04:55,253
Is there a bar in here?
Wayne!
129
00:04:55,253 --> 00:04:56,753
You are
lookin' cuter
130
00:04:56,753 --> 00:04:58,380
than a little
beaver pup today.
131
00:04:58,505 --> 00:04:59,716
Beaver pups are
called kits.
132
00:04:59,716 --> 00:05:02,135
McMurray, why don't you go
back to the green room
133
00:05:02,260 --> 00:05:03,760
so I can let Wayne
here get processed
134
00:05:03,760 --> 00:05:05,471
through hair and make-up?
Pass.
135
00:05:05,471 --> 00:05:06,931
I'll just takes
a little bits of rouge
136
00:05:06,931 --> 00:05:08,599
to add some contours
to my cheekbones.
137
00:05:08,599 --> 00:05:10,476
And wardrobe.
I'm already in it.
138
00:05:10,476 --> 00:05:12,228
But your friend
Dary showed up
139
00:05:12,353 --> 00:05:14,856
in his barn clothes!
140
00:05:14,981 --> 00:05:16,440
I am as God made me.
Yes!
141
00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:18,525
I, McMurray,
142
00:05:18,650 --> 00:05:20,902
shall wait in the green room
like a professional.
143
00:05:20,902 --> 00:05:22,488
McMurray, also, I think
you might need
144
00:05:22,488 --> 00:05:23,822
a little bit of wardrobe
processing, too,
145
00:05:23,822 --> 00:05:25,073
'cause I'm not sure
what happened
146
00:05:25,073 --> 00:05:26,491
but your shirt shrunk.
147
00:05:26,491 --> 00:05:27,784
And you know what,
it's distracting me.
148
00:05:27,784 --> 00:05:28,870
Pop it right off.
149
00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:34,166
Oh!
150
00:05:34,166 --> 00:05:35,793
Why don't youse hang around
after your show
151
00:05:35,793 --> 00:05:38,378
to watch my show to see how
a real pro does a call-in show?
152
00:05:38,503 --> 00:05:39,880
Why don't
you say "show" again?
153
00:05:40,005 --> 00:05:42,049
Hope you packed
some showmanship, Wayne.
154
00:05:42,174 --> 00:05:43,842
Atta boy.
Now, Wayne, admittedly
155
00:05:43,967 --> 00:05:46,053
I do not know
a whole heck of a lot
156
00:05:46,178 --> 00:05:47,305
about a call-in show,
157
00:05:47,305 --> 00:05:49,556
but it strikes me
that it is complicated.
158
00:05:49,681 --> 00:05:50,974
No, it isn't.
It isn't?
159
00:05:50,974 --> 00:05:52,810
People call in
with their questions
160
00:05:52,810 --> 00:05:54,186
and then you answer them.
161
00:05:54,186 --> 00:05:56,313
Ooh, stripped down.
162
00:05:56,313 --> 00:05:58,024
Bare-bones.
I like it.
163
00:05:58,024 --> 00:05:59,149
Speaking of stripping
and bones,
164
00:05:59,149 --> 00:06:00,525
why don't you pop
that shirt right off?
165
00:06:00,525 --> 00:06:02,986
Katy, can you help us
screen callers for nut sacks?
166
00:06:02,986 --> 00:06:04,529
That's a Texas size 10-4.
167
00:06:04,529 --> 00:06:07,866
Thank you.
168
00:06:07,991 --> 00:06:10,536
Screening your callers,
huh, Wayne?
169
00:06:10,536 --> 00:06:12,205
Why don't youse hang around
after your show
170
00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:15,707
to see how a real professional
respects his audience.
171
00:06:15,832 --> 00:06:16,875
All right, McMurray.
Less talk
172
00:06:16,875 --> 00:06:18,335
and more popping
that shirt off. Go away.
173
00:06:18,335 --> 00:06:20,046
Can't work
under these conditions.
174
00:06:28,178 --> 00:06:31,349
Can't really screen nut sacks
if they're already in studio.
175
00:06:31,349 --> 00:06:32,849
Hickolodeon!
Huh?
176
00:06:32,849 --> 00:06:33,892
For the title.
177
00:06:34,017 --> 00:06:35,185
We saw on Facebook
that you're making
178
00:06:35,185 --> 00:06:36,979
an agricultural call-in show
and we thought...
179
00:06:37,104 --> 00:06:38,022
Hickolodeon!
180
00:06:39,731 --> 00:06:41,024
Get the fuck
outta here.
181
00:06:43,236 --> 00:06:45,947
Hello? Yeah,
I'll put you in the queue.
182
00:06:48,616 --> 00:06:50,743
They need music.
Like a theme song!
183
00:06:50,743 --> 00:06:51,911
Why do youse care?
184
00:06:52,036 --> 00:06:53,746
We're in the platinum age
of television.
185
00:06:53,746 --> 00:06:54,871
I must subscribe.
186
00:06:56,416 --> 00:06:57,959
Hello?
187
00:06:58,084 --> 00:06:59,293
Yeah, I'll put you
in the queue.
188
00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:01,169
Phone lines are already fuego.
Fi-ya filled.
189
00:07:01,294 --> 00:07:02,630
We need
something bold.
190
00:07:02,755 --> 00:07:05,423
Something that sonically
insists we're serious.
191
00:07:05,423 --> 00:07:07,885
A new astral plane
of euphoric bliss.
192
00:07:07,885 --> 00:07:09,137
Scribble down
into some catstep
193
00:07:09,262 --> 00:07:10,471
with some
unlicensed samples?
194
00:07:10,596 --> 00:07:12,140
White labels?
195
00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:14,183
Why don't we just dig out
our Lilith Fair CDs
196
00:07:14,183 --> 00:07:17,353
and calm the crowd with
a set of vintage ecto-folk.
197
00:07:17,353 --> 00:07:18,895
Giant step
through fat pants
198
00:07:18,895 --> 00:07:21,399
and rip into some
Midwestern fidget juke?
199
00:07:21,399 --> 00:07:22,649
Frick!
200
00:07:22,774 --> 00:07:23,734
Why don't
we just beat juggle
201
00:07:23,734 --> 00:07:25,820
some laptopist
new jack swing?
202
00:07:27,738 --> 00:07:29,782
Wayne, the camera
hates plaid.
203
00:07:29,782 --> 00:07:31,325
'Kay.
Also adds ten pounds.
204
00:07:31,325 --> 00:07:32,368
Aren't you sassy,
Miss Camera.
205
00:07:32,368 --> 00:07:33,911
She's a bit of a cow.
206
00:07:33,911 --> 00:07:35,580
Can we smoke in here?
No.
207
00:07:35,580 --> 00:07:37,539
Okay. I've got
a shirtless Mr. McMurray
208
00:07:37,664 --> 00:07:39,459
in the green room
who has agreed,
209
00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:40,834
very generously,
210
00:07:40,959 --> 00:07:43,462
to let you wear his
Mr. Clean-style white T-shirt.
211
00:07:43,462 --> 00:07:45,839
Now, may I also recommend
that you try on
212
00:07:45,964 --> 00:07:48,467
this Mr. Clean-style
gold hoop earring
213
00:07:48,467 --> 00:07:49,676
together...
Five minutes!
214
00:07:49,801 --> 00:07:51,428
Oh, God. Oh, none
of this is gonna work.
215
00:07:51,428 --> 00:07:52,971
We don't have time
for any of it. Okay.
216
00:07:53,096 --> 00:07:55,390
I need to go take some stills
of Mr. McMurray.
217
00:07:55,390 --> 00:07:58,185
I say still,
but it may move.
218
00:07:59,979 --> 00:08:00,938
McMurray!
219
00:08:04,649 --> 00:08:06,152
I'll add you
to the queue.
220
00:08:06,152 --> 00:08:08,988
Here comes a rumble
of Tampa Bay booty trance.
221
00:08:08,988 --> 00:08:10,864
NuSkool anthem
acid breaks.
222
00:08:10,989 --> 00:08:11,991
If you beat juggle
two-step,
223
00:08:11,991 --> 00:08:13,575
you get a four-step
which blends perfectly
224
00:08:13,575 --> 00:08:15,577
into sped-up
Manc baggy B-sides.
225
00:08:15,577 --> 00:08:17,830
Get'em ankled
to a set of ex-pat Rio funk.
226
00:08:17,830 --> 00:08:19,248
CanCon 40% rule,
227
00:08:19,373 --> 00:08:22,209
let's go panoramic
Labrador toughcore.
228
00:08:22,709 --> 00:08:23,960
Oh, Miss Katy,
229
00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:25,671
I am loving
this look for you.
230
00:08:25,671 --> 00:08:27,089
You're all like,
"Hello, operator,
231
00:08:27,214 --> 00:08:28,215
"I'd like to make
232
00:08:28,340 --> 00:08:29,508
"a person-to-person
phone call, please,
233
00:08:29,508 --> 00:08:31,344
"trans-Atlantic
to my sister in Chicago.
234
00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:32,762
"We're so worried
about her husband,
235
00:08:32,887 --> 00:08:34,888
"we haven't heard from him
since the Battle of the Bulge."
236
00:08:35,013 --> 00:08:36,556
Thank you, Glen.
You're welcome.
237
00:08:38,017 --> 00:08:40,143
I'll add you
to the queue.
238
00:08:40,143 --> 00:08:42,146
Paradise Garage-era
twelve-inch extended mixes
239
00:08:42,146 --> 00:08:44,147
of spoken word
historical speeches.
240
00:08:44,147 --> 00:08:45,815
Jump-up
liquid Rotterdam
241
00:08:45,815 --> 00:08:47,234
and then rip into
some hot horn
242
00:08:47,359 --> 00:08:48,819
for a sweaty
sax break.
243
00:08:48,819 --> 00:08:50,195
Restaurantica?
244
00:08:50,195 --> 00:08:51,863
Atmospherica?
Modern lounge.
245
00:08:51,863 --> 00:08:53,657
Fuck gastro-house.
246
00:08:53,657 --> 00:08:54,742
I'll add you
to the queue.
247
00:08:54,867 --> 00:08:56,493
I get a rash from
harsh metals on my skin,
248
00:08:56,493 --> 00:08:58,161
so can I just hold this
on the outside?
249
00:08:58,161 --> 00:08:59,663
No!
Hello?
250
00:09:01,290 --> 00:09:04,209
Now, you'd never be
that soft on air, eh?
251
00:09:04,209 --> 00:09:06,170
Monterrey hip-house cassingles.
252
00:09:06,170 --> 00:09:07,296
Hello?
Step into straight edge
253
00:09:07,421 --> 00:09:09,047
progressive
tribal coldwave.
254
00:09:09,047 --> 00:09:10,340
You just take
the reins off the hops
255
00:09:10,340 --> 00:09:12,008
and we'll jump in when you
needs us, good buddies.
256
00:09:12,008 --> 00:09:13,386
Got 'er, good buddy.
257
00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:14,844
Adding you to the queue. Hello?
258
00:09:14,844 --> 00:09:16,556
C-86 Nu NRG
Goa Garage!
259
00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:18,431
Ramadan symphonic
soca screamo.
260
00:09:18,556 --> 00:09:19,517
Katy?
One minute.
261
00:09:19,517 --> 00:09:20,850
Can I have
my shirt back, please?
262
00:09:22,435 --> 00:09:23,436
And my fuckin' pants too!
263
00:09:24,854 --> 00:09:25,855
Preacher!
264
00:09:25,855 --> 00:09:27,733
Hello?
265
00:09:27,733 --> 00:09:29,609
Gospel-inspired
power pop psy-funk.
266
00:09:29,609 --> 00:09:31,862
Trombone-based
zydeco hardstyle bangers.
267
00:09:31,862 --> 00:09:33,030
Adding you
to the queue.
268
00:09:33,030 --> 00:09:35,115
African Italo K-pop.
J-tek minimal gloomcore.
269
00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:36,242
Katy?
Glen,
270
00:09:36,242 --> 00:09:37,493
you're very good
at this job.
271
00:09:37,618 --> 00:09:38,536
Oh, why thank you.
272
00:09:38,536 --> 00:09:40,036
I actually have a degree
in management.
273
00:09:40,036 --> 00:09:42,123
What kind?
Micro. Time!
274
00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:43,623
Uh, ten seconds.
275
00:09:43,748 --> 00:09:45,459
Quiet on set!
Ring the bell!
276
00:09:47,753 --> 00:09:48,921
No surf psych a capella?
277
00:09:49,046 --> 00:09:50,422
No north coast
fiddle funk?
278
00:09:51,715 --> 00:09:54,509
All right. In three, two...
279
00:10:03,477 --> 00:10:04,394
And go.
280
00:10:07,064 --> 00:10:07,982
You all right?
281
00:10:10,776 --> 00:10:13,237
Uh, Like... Likely means
we can go.
282
00:10:13,237 --> 00:10:15,156
All right. Right on.
283
00:10:15,156 --> 00:10:18,993
Um, well, the show's
called Crack An Ag,
284
00:10:19,118 --> 00:10:21,911
and...
"Ag" spelt A-G.
285
00:10:21,911 --> 00:10:23,580
Yeah, like "Agriculture."
286
00:10:23,580 --> 00:10:25,248
It's what we decided
to call the show.
287
00:10:26,791 --> 00:10:29,170
That's what we decided
to call the call-in show, so.
288
00:10:30,838 --> 00:10:32,547
So, youse can calls-in
with your questions
289
00:10:32,672 --> 00:10:34,716
and we will
helps you if we cans.
290
00:10:34,716 --> 00:10:36,551
But, uh, before
we get started,
291
00:10:36,676 --> 00:10:39,180
uh, I just wanna...
292
00:10:39,305 --> 00:10:41,849
Thank my sister Katy here.
She's in, uh...
293
00:10:41,974 --> 00:10:43,809
This booth
in the back there and,
294
00:10:43,809 --> 00:10:45,853
uh, you know, she's gonna
take your calls.
295
00:10:45,978 --> 00:10:47,104
She's gonna help us
take your calls,
296
00:10:47,104 --> 00:10:49,357
so we can
help youse, so.
297
00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:51,484
Yeah, I'd just like to thank
a few people as well...
298
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:52,692
No. No. No.
...before we start...
299
00:10:52,817 --> 00:10:54,362
We're gonna do the rest
of the thank yous
300
00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:56,155
at the end of the show.
Yeah, we'll probably thank
301
00:10:56,155 --> 00:10:57,489
a bunch of people
at the end of the show.
302
00:10:57,489 --> 00:10:58,907
Or we would just be
thanking people all show.
303
00:10:58,907 --> 00:11:00,033
We'd never
get through the door.
304
00:11:01,535 --> 00:11:03,161
Um...
305
00:11:03,161 --> 00:11:06,081
Take a call.
Take a call.
306
00:11:07,208 --> 00:11:08,501
Is that for me?
307
00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:10,460
Take...
Phone!
308
00:11:11,921 --> 00:11:14,339
Let's take a call.
What's that?
309
00:11:14,464 --> 00:11:18,176
Uh, uh, we're going
to take a call now. Stop.
310
00:11:18,176 --> 00:11:19,302
Yeah, all right.
311
00:11:20,554 --> 00:11:23,014
Turn off
your fudging phones!
312
00:11:23,014 --> 00:11:24,849
That's embarrassing.
313
00:11:24,849 --> 00:11:27,644
We have
Brett Nichol on the line.
314
00:11:27,644 --> 00:11:29,062
Is he really?
Yeah.
315
00:11:31,107 --> 00:11:33,191
Well, can he hear us?
I can hear yas.
316
00:11:33,191 --> 00:11:34,151
Right on.
317
00:11:35,902 --> 00:11:37,363
Bretzky!
You don't need to yell.
318
00:11:37,363 --> 00:11:39,198
He can
hear you just fine.
319
00:11:39,198 --> 00:11:40,240
Right on.
320
00:11:41,157 --> 00:11:42,660
Right on.
321
00:11:42,660 --> 00:11:44,328
Youse still there?
Yup.
322
00:11:45,537 --> 00:11:46,497
Right on.
323
00:11:47,580 --> 00:11:49,374
Bretzky?
How're ya now?
324
00:11:49,374 --> 00:11:51,042
Oh, good. And you?
Not so bad.
325
00:11:51,042 --> 00:11:53,170
Right on.
326
00:11:53,170 --> 00:11:55,547
Say, did I hear you're
coaching this year, or?
327
00:11:55,547 --> 00:11:56,882
That's the plan.
328
00:11:56,882 --> 00:11:58,591
Where's Blaker playing?
329
00:11:59,634 --> 00:12:01,929
Looking like Ripley.
Oh.
330
00:12:02,054 --> 00:12:03,388
Eh, Ripley's
after him then, eh?
331
00:12:03,388 --> 00:12:05,474
I hear they're loading up.
Yup.
332
00:12:05,474 --> 00:12:08,185
Uh, is Teddy heading
back up north, or?
333
00:12:08,185 --> 00:12:10,812
No, no. He'll be in Guelph.
Brianna's there, so.
334
00:12:10,812 --> 00:12:12,522
Well, Brianna's been there
for a couple of years now.
335
00:12:12,522 --> 00:12:13,565
That's right. That's cool.
336
00:12:13,565 --> 00:12:15,025
What's Mac doing?
337
00:12:15,025 --> 00:12:17,027
Mac's reffin' now.
Is he really?
338
00:12:17,027 --> 00:12:18,528
Yup.
Right on.
339
00:12:19,613 --> 00:12:21,739
Uh, we'll...
340
00:12:21,739 --> 00:12:24,535
Uh, Bretzky, the show's
called Crack an Ag, and...
341
00:12:25,453 --> 00:12:26,911
I bet you can't, so.
342
00:12:26,911 --> 00:12:28,455
Thanks.
You bet.
343
00:12:30,748 --> 00:12:32,084
Uh, hows can we helps yas?
Don't touch.
344
00:12:32,084 --> 00:12:33,293
Well, chainsaws
aren't going through shit.
345
00:12:33,418 --> 00:12:34,420
No touching.
346
00:12:34,420 --> 00:12:36,129
How big?
Guide bar?
347
00:12:36,129 --> 00:12:37,256
No, your horn.
348
00:12:39,258 --> 00:12:40,801
Yeah, guide bar's a 18-inch.
349
00:12:40,926 --> 00:12:42,386
Just a little guy then.
Yeah.
350
00:12:43,637 --> 00:12:44,637
Well, how long
ya had it?
351
00:12:45,473 --> 00:12:46,766
Two seasons.
352
00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:48,684
Where are you takesin'
it to get sharpened?
353
00:12:48,809 --> 00:12:50,768
I sharpen it myself.
Oh, no.
354
00:12:50,768 --> 00:12:52,479
What, you never
take it in for that?
355
00:12:52,604 --> 00:12:53,814
No.
Oh, I mean...
356
00:12:54,647 --> 00:12:55,775
I don't know.
357
00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:57,651
I might take it in
for a new chain altogether.
358
00:12:57,777 --> 00:12:59,445
If you takes it in,
you should bring your axe too,
359
00:12:59,445 --> 00:13:01,238
'cause they'll sharpen
that up for ten bucks.
360
00:13:01,238 --> 00:13:02,614
Yeah, nine-ten bucks.
Yeah, you know,
361
00:13:02,614 --> 00:13:04,782
like, you know, nine plus tax,
about ten bucks.
362
00:13:04,908 --> 00:13:07,203
That's in addition
to the sign that say nine bucks.
363
00:13:07,203 --> 00:13:08,329
Oh, yeah.
And then,
364
00:13:08,454 --> 00:13:09,455
that's how they get you
to come in.
365
00:13:09,455 --> 00:13:10,623
Nine bucks
is better than ten bucks.
366
00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:11,748
Coming and going,
you know?
367
00:13:11,748 --> 00:13:13,584
You know?
I don't like...
368
00:13:13,584 --> 00:13:15,335
Change, so, just ten bucks.
Mmm.
369
00:13:16,961 --> 00:13:18,421
Thought I was maybe
sharpening it wrong.
370
00:13:20,132 --> 00:13:22,468
Could anybody tell him...
No.
371
00:13:22,468 --> 00:13:24,762
A career sawyer wouldn't even
have that mastered, no.
372
00:13:24,762 --> 00:13:26,638
No. No. No.
Oh, no!
373
00:13:26,638 --> 00:13:28,349
Well, they'd be the first one
to tell you that, too.
374
00:13:29,682 --> 00:13:31,310
You ever hear about,
uh, sawyer's fatigue?
375
00:13:31,310 --> 00:13:32,310
No.
376
00:13:32,310 --> 00:13:34,772
Uh, that's a real thing,
so, you know...
377
00:13:35,564 --> 00:13:36,690
Stay alert.
378
00:13:38,566 --> 00:13:39,527
Well, I don't know...
379
00:13:40,985 --> 00:13:42,820
Sounds like you should
take it in, Bretzky.
380
00:13:42,820 --> 00:13:45,907
That's what I'll do.
Right on.
381
00:13:45,907 --> 00:13:48,993
Tell, uh... Tell Pete
and Mary-Anne we said hi.
382
00:13:48,993 --> 00:13:51,120
Will do.
Okay.
383
00:13:51,120 --> 00:13:52,665
Well, all right.
Talk to ya.
384
00:13:52,790 --> 00:13:54,834
Yup, talk to ya.
385
00:13:56,502 --> 00:13:59,671
We have Matt Merkley
on the phone.
386
00:13:59,671 --> 00:14:01,214
Is he really?
Yeah.
387
00:14:02,883 --> 00:14:04,008
Merkley!
388
00:14:04,008 --> 00:14:06,887
Tip of the dong,
the teats, the tats.
389
00:14:07,012 --> 00:14:10,807
Tip of the dong, the...
390
00:14:13,352 --> 00:14:14,269
Patch'em in, preacher!
391
00:14:15,061 --> 00:14:16,062
Okay.
392
00:14:17,397 --> 00:14:18,315
Welcome, caller.
393
00:14:19,190 --> 00:14:22,485
You've joined an Agri-Cult.
394
00:14:22,485 --> 00:14:24,195
Hey, first time
long time over here.
395
00:14:24,195 --> 00:14:27,532
Well, that's just
not possible, but okay.
396
00:14:27,532 --> 00:14:29,535
Hey, McMurray, you still
farmin' chickens, eh?
397
00:14:29,535 --> 00:14:31,579
Oh. Chicken breed by day.
398
00:14:31,704 --> 00:14:32,745
Chicken dance by night.
399
00:14:32,745 --> 00:14:34,248
So, let me ask ya.
400
00:14:34,373 --> 00:14:36,041
Ya ever fuck Mrs. McMurray
in the chicken coop?
401
00:14:36,041 --> 00:14:37,584
Huh?
402
00:14:37,709 --> 00:14:39,168
'Cause I'll tell ya,
403
00:14:39,168 --> 00:14:40,588
that's the first place
I'd be fuckin' your wife.
404
00:14:40,713 --> 00:14:42,171
Oh, my Lord.
405
00:14:42,171 --> 00:14:44,049
I will slap the yellow
off of your teeth
406
00:14:44,049 --> 00:14:46,051
and your belly,
you sumbitch!
407
00:14:46,051 --> 00:14:49,137
Hang up, preacher. Next caller.
408
00:14:49,137 --> 00:14:50,723
I love
the show, McMurray.
409
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:52,682
It's really pulled me out of
some dark places along the way.
410
00:14:52,682 --> 00:14:54,225
What?
Well,
411
00:14:54,225 --> 00:14:56,729
you've joined an Agri-Cult.
412
00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:58,647
Yeah, I got a question
about husbandry.
413
00:14:58,647 --> 00:15:00,940
You've come
to the right place.
414
00:15:00,940 --> 00:15:04,402
We've raised animals
for meat, milk, eggs...
415
00:15:04,402 --> 00:15:06,738
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I meant you as a husband.
416
00:15:06,738 --> 00:15:08,740
Why the fuck
would Mrs. McMurray
417
00:15:08,740 --> 00:15:10,618
marry a piece of shit
like you?
418
00:15:10,618 --> 00:15:12,201
She's an eleven out of ten,
419
00:15:12,201 --> 00:15:14,912
but that decision downgrades
her to an even dime.
420
00:15:14,912 --> 00:15:16,205
Fuck you!
421
00:15:16,205 --> 00:15:18,876
I will find out where you are,
you sumbitch.
422
00:15:18,876 --> 00:15:19,959
Hang up, preacher!
423
00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:22,211
Next caller!
424
00:15:23,296 --> 00:15:25,049
I'd like to remind
the callers at home
425
00:15:25,049 --> 00:15:27,426
that this is
an agricultural show.
426
00:15:27,426 --> 00:15:30,930
Please keep
the questions ag-related.
427
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,222
Thank you.
428
00:15:32,222 --> 00:15:33,306
Welcome, caller.
429
00:15:34,349 --> 00:15:36,727
You've joined an Agri-cult.
430
00:15:36,727 --> 00:15:38,019
Hey, hi, McMurray.
431
00:15:38,019 --> 00:15:39,979
What's the best way
to connect a three-point hitch?
432
00:15:40,104 --> 00:15:42,690
When connecting your trailer to
your tractor with a classic...
433
00:15:42,815 --> 00:15:44,109
No, no. I was
actually wondering
434
00:15:44,234 --> 00:15:45,652
what you think the best way
to get your wife
435
00:15:45,777 --> 00:15:47,070
and balls-hot sister
436
00:15:47,070 --> 00:15:48,613
into a hot, sweaty
three-way would be.
437
00:15:48,613 --> 00:15:50,950
I'm talking about
some real hot fuck action!
438
00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:53,118
Fuck!
Oh, no!
439
00:15:53,118 --> 00:15:55,244
That's right, I'll fuck 'em
long dick style!
440
00:15:55,244 --> 00:15:57,288
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!
441
00:15:57,288 --> 00:15:58,666
Hang up, preacher!
442
00:15:58,791 --> 00:16:00,459
Okay.
443
00:16:00,584 --> 00:16:02,628
Fuck you, fuck youse. Next...
444
00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:04,463
Fucking caller!
445
00:16:04,588 --> 00:16:05,964
Hey, McMurray.
Just...
446
00:16:05,964 --> 00:16:07,299
I was jerking off
to your wife right now.
447
00:16:07,424 --> 00:16:08,550
If you could help me
cross the finish line,
448
00:16:08,550 --> 00:16:09,801
how does your wife orgasm?
449
00:16:09,801 --> 00:16:11,427
Is it like
a high-pitched squeal
450
00:16:11,427 --> 00:16:13,973
or is it more like a
a low groan? And, thanks, buddy.
451
00:16:14,098 --> 00:16:16,432
I'm gonna make you
squeal like a pig
452
00:16:16,432 --> 00:16:18,352
in a positraction El Camino!
453
00:16:19,394 --> 00:16:21,604
Oh, no!
Hands off Iggy's Azalea!
454
00:16:29,530 --> 00:16:31,489
Fuck that shit.
455
00:16:31,614 --> 00:16:33,492
Fuckin' I'm kinda looking
forward to the next one.
456
00:16:33,492 --> 00:16:34,535
That was
a good time today.
457
00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:35,828
Well, it was
a real good time.
458
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:37,787
It was a great time.
I should say, good buddies.
459
00:16:37,787 --> 00:16:40,040
Now, are you sure you won't
reconsider the theme song?
460
00:16:40,040 --> 00:16:41,874
I've got rare,
a big beat Christmas
461
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:44,670
crunk Record Store Day-only
seven-inch from Discogs.
462
00:16:44,670 --> 00:16:46,421
Do you mean Disco Gs?
463
00:16:46,421 --> 00:16:47,839
I think we're sorted.
464
00:16:47,839 --> 00:16:50,926
How about
new age abstract
gangsta big band?
465
00:16:50,926 --> 00:16:53,428
NuSkool old wave
downbeat rock-a-booty?
466
00:16:53,553 --> 00:16:55,263
Shut the fuck up!
467
00:16:55,263 --> 00:16:56,348
So, you enjoying your
468
00:16:56,348 --> 00:16:57,558
engagement party there,
good buddy?
469
00:16:57,683 --> 00:16:59,685
Looks more like a stump burn
to me, good buddy.
470
00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:01,686
Well, we're all heres
'cause youse gots engaged.
471
00:17:01,686 --> 00:17:04,732
Well, I'm here because we got
a big fuck-off stump to burn.
472
00:17:05,398 --> 00:17:06,649
More to that, buddy.
473
00:17:06,649 --> 00:17:08,694
He's not your buddy.
474
00:17:08,694 --> 00:17:10,695
Well, seeing as
marriage is complicated...
475
00:17:10,695 --> 00:17:11,989
No, it isn't.
It isn't?
476
00:17:11,989 --> 00:17:13,197
You decide
you're going to spend
477
00:17:13,197 --> 00:17:14,616
the rest of your life
with someone,
478
00:17:14,742 --> 00:17:16,201
and then you do it.
479
00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:17,828
What I think he's
trying to say is
480
00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:20,539
you can only smash one woman
for the rest of your life.
481
00:17:20,539 --> 00:17:22,541
Hence the decision
to make her his wifes.
482
00:17:22,541 --> 00:17:23,541
For life.
483
00:17:23,666 --> 00:17:24,752
It's a super important
concern, bro.
484
00:17:24,877 --> 00:17:26,669
Thanks, bro.
485
00:17:26,669 --> 00:17:30,549
But my question was
more along the lines of,
486
00:17:30,549 --> 00:17:33,926
could we now try and smash babes
that you've already smashed?
487
00:17:35,762 --> 00:17:37,013
Because, I mean,
we know the code, bro.
488
00:17:37,013 --> 00:17:38,432
He's not your bro.
489
00:17:38,432 --> 00:17:40,184
Oh, yeah. If you all wanna
talk code, we know it, boys.
490
00:17:40,184 --> 00:17:41,518
Yeah, and name one person
491
00:17:41,518 --> 00:17:43,853
who knows the code
better than us.
492
00:17:43,853 --> 00:17:44,897
Yeah, go ahead, I'll wait.
493
00:17:44,897 --> 00:17:46,564
Why don't
you say "code" again, bud.
494
00:17:46,689 --> 00:17:48,317
More like Pearl Jam's
No Code.
495
00:17:48,442 --> 00:17:49,609
Atta boy.
496
00:17:49,609 --> 00:17:50,903
What's bro code?
497
00:17:50,903 --> 00:17:52,404
The bro code is
498
00:17:52,404 --> 00:17:54,822
you never smash
a bro's girlfriend...
499
00:17:54,947 --> 00:17:56,449
Or ex-girlfriend.
500
00:17:56,449 --> 00:17:58,202
But that's only
bro code-ish.
501
00:17:59,285 --> 00:18:00,913
And I think that's it.
Yeah, that's it.
502
00:18:00,913 --> 00:18:02,246
Don't make any sense.
503
00:18:02,246 --> 00:18:04,750
But seeing as you've now
hung them up permanently...
504
00:18:04,750 --> 00:18:06,918
I would philander
with Tanis so fast.
505
00:18:06,918 --> 00:18:08,712
You couldn't wheel Tanis,
you pilon.
506
00:18:08,712 --> 00:18:10,714
Buddy, you couldn't wheel
a fuckin' tire down a hill.
507
00:18:10,714 --> 00:18:12,256
You haven't seen his dick.
508
00:18:12,256 --> 00:18:13,466
Neither have you.
509
00:18:13,466 --> 00:18:15,385
You'll just have
to take that up with Tanis.
510
00:18:16,177 --> 00:18:18,097
So, what about the...
511
00:18:18,097 --> 00:18:19,598
Angie who.
512
00:18:19,598 --> 00:18:21,766
Sick, buddy.
I'd love to smash her.
513
00:18:21,766 --> 00:18:23,100
Sick, boys.
514
00:18:23,100 --> 00:18:24,394
I'll see if she wants
to smash right after this.
515
00:18:24,394 --> 00:18:25,436
Yeah.
516
00:18:25,436 --> 00:18:27,313
So, I guess that leaves, uh...
517
00:18:27,438 --> 00:18:31,109
Rosie. Rosie O'Donnell was
on Howard Stern the other day
518
00:18:31,109 --> 00:18:32,569
and she's a damn good interview.
519
00:18:32,569 --> 00:18:34,279
Well, everybody's good on Stern.
520
00:18:34,279 --> 00:18:36,782
Couldn't help
but catch a bit of the convo.
521
00:18:36,782 --> 00:18:39,118
Just 'cause you're married
doesn't mean you can't
522
00:18:39,118 --> 00:18:41,328
smash a whole bunch
of people.
523
00:18:41,453 --> 00:18:43,455
I can confirm.
524
00:18:43,455 --> 00:18:45,040
MARIE-FRED: Hell
of an engagement party.
525
00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:46,125
Merci.
526
00:18:46,125 --> 00:18:47,626
Looks more like
a stump burn to me.
527
00:18:47,626 --> 00:18:50,128
Big brother, we're all here
for your engagement.
528
00:18:50,128 --> 00:18:51,504
Well, I'm here
'cause we got a...
529
00:18:51,629 --> 00:18:54,049
Big fuck-off stump burn.
Reviens-en.
530
00:18:54,049 --> 00:18:56,009
Oh, yeah?
531
00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:57,511
You like Puppers?
Yeah, I like Puppers.
532
00:18:57,636 --> 00:18:59,346
You like Gus'n Bru?
I like Gus'n Bru.
533
00:18:59,471 --> 00:19:02,765
Well, let's
raise a glass
534
00:19:04,685 --> 00:19:09,397
to Marie-Fred and Wayne
settling down, as they say.
535
00:19:09,522 --> 00:19:11,399
Droppin' anchor.
Without a doubtin' it.
536
00:19:11,524 --> 00:19:13,025
It's a life-o-suction, buddy.
537
00:19:13,150 --> 00:19:14,485
Bending over
backwards, boys.
538
00:19:14,485 --> 00:19:15,695
Ignoring statistics.
539
00:19:15,820 --> 00:19:17,614
Becoming one!
540
00:19:17,614 --> 00:19:19,491
You must consummate
the marriage!
541
00:19:19,491 --> 00:19:22,077
Hear hear!
542
00:19:22,202 --> 00:19:25,164
Oh! Oh, no! Am I late
for the engagement party?
543
00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:26,706
It's a stump burn.
544
00:19:26,831 --> 00:19:29,501
You must consummate
the marriage.
545
00:19:29,501 --> 00:19:30,668
Yeah, we covered that.
546
00:19:30,668 --> 00:19:32,795
Well, thanks
for coming, everybody.
547
00:19:32,795 --> 00:19:33,880
Let's get
fuckin' hammered.
548
00:19:38,510 --> 00:19:40,220
I, uh...
549
00:19:40,345 --> 00:19:42,889
I brought a little bits
of aviation fuel
for the occasion.
550
00:19:43,014 --> 00:19:44,183
Oh!
We throw
551
00:19:44,183 --> 00:19:45,684
some aviation fuel
on the cocksucker?
552
00:19:45,684 --> 00:19:46,935
Fuckin' I'm surprised
we're not puttin'
553
00:19:46,935 --> 00:19:48,811
aviation fuel on the cocksucker
right now!
554
00:19:50,522 --> 00:19:52,482
Let's get
fucking reckless, boys.
555
00:19:52,482 --> 00:19:54,650
Let's put
gasoline on a fire!
556
00:19:57,695 --> 00:20:01,324
♪ Well, don't you
Know 'bout us?
557
00:20:01,324 --> 00:20:04,619
♪ Our secret love?
558
00:20:05,704 --> 00:20:07,830
♪ We both learned pain
559
00:20:08,749 --> 00:20:10,375
♪ When we were young
560
00:20:10,375 --> 00:20:13,378
♪ Once upon a time
561
00:20:13,503 --> 00:20:16,714
♪ We were high and free
562
00:20:16,714 --> 00:20:19,842
♪ Then this old war
563
00:20:19,842 --> 00:20:22,929
♪ Come runnin' for me
564
00:20:24,388 --> 00:20:27,516
♪ Then the draft man come
565
00:20:27,516 --> 00:20:30,728
♪ I left and went on the run
566
00:20:30,728 --> 00:20:33,439
♪ I know
That you were too young
567
00:20:33,564 --> 00:20:37,194
♪ To know why I went away
568
00:20:37,194 --> 00:20:39,362
♪ Hey Willy, hey Willy
569
00:20:40,446 --> 00:20:42,657
♪ You've got yourself a girl
570
00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:45,785
♪ Hey Willy, hey Willy
571
00:20:46,954 --> 00:20:49,121
♪ Been lonely in this world
572
00:20:50,122 --> 00:20:52,376
♪ You know, you know ♪
40738
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