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1
00:00:08,633 --> 00:00:11,886
We went shopping for a whiskey
night the other day.
2
00:00:16,349 --> 00:00:18,600
That's a big fuck-off bottle
of Gus N' Bru.
3
00:00:18,600 --> 00:00:20,687
It's better to be looking
at it then looking
for it.
4
00:00:20,687 --> 00:00:22,020
You boys getting
into it tonight?
5
00:00:22,146 --> 00:00:23,773
Yeah, it's a Texas-sized
ten-four.
6
00:00:23,773 --> 00:00:25,233
That's a Texas-sized
two-six.
7
00:00:25,233 --> 00:00:28,611
That's a Texas Micky,
super shooters,
let's get cracking.
8
00:00:28,611 --> 00:00:30,029
Wayne.
9
00:00:30,029 --> 00:00:31,197
What's the problem,
Katy?
10
00:00:31,322 --> 00:00:33,115
It happened again.
What did?
11
00:00:33,115 --> 00:00:35,702
Gus left a Mr. Big
on the floor
this morning.
12
00:00:35,827 --> 00:00:37,370
No, he never.
13
00:00:37,370 --> 00:00:39,163
He dropped a Hershey bar
in the living room
just last Tuesday,
14
00:00:39,163 --> 00:00:41,541
although upon closer inspection,
it did look more like
a Hershey's mint.
15
00:00:41,541 --> 00:00:43,959
Well, I'd sooner believe
that was you, Squirrelly Dan.
16
00:00:43,959 --> 00:00:45,627
So watch how
you speak on his name,
you know?
17
00:00:45,627 --> 00:00:48,422
Hey, buddy... He left
a Twix on the floor
just yesterday.
18
00:00:48,422 --> 00:00:51,217
And what made it a Twix
as opposed to a Big Turk, Dary?
19
00:00:51,217 --> 00:00:53,386
Well, there were
two of 'em.
20
00:00:53,511 --> 00:00:55,137
They're identical,
and they're side
by each.
21
00:00:55,137 --> 00:00:57,681
Over and out.
How would you ask somebody
if you wanted just
22
00:00:57,681 --> 00:00:59,349
one of their Twix's?
23
00:00:59,349 --> 00:01:02,062
Well, just what you said.
"Can I have one of your Twix's?"
24
00:01:02,187 --> 00:01:03,937
No, it'd be...
"Could I have a Twick?"
25
00:01:04,062 --> 00:01:06,649
In any event, it's starting
to look like Willy Wonka's
emptying his pockets
26
00:01:06,649 --> 00:01:08,068
around your house,
good buddy.
27
00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:10,277
Now, you's realize
the weight of
these allegations.
28
00:01:10,402 --> 00:01:11,488
These accusations.
29
00:01:11,488 --> 00:01:13,363
Can confirm.
30
00:01:13,363 --> 00:01:15,241
And you's realize
the consequences at hand
should your claim be false.
31
00:01:15,366 --> 00:01:17,160
Claims is's this.
Can confirm's.
32
00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:19,746
I'll only give you's
one more chance
to retract.
33
00:01:19,746 --> 00:01:21,330
No questions asked.
34
00:01:21,330 --> 00:01:23,583
Before this conversation
becomes a confrontation.
35
00:01:23,583 --> 00:01:26,795
We wouldn't be bringing it
to you if it weren't worth
being brought'en.
36
00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:27,920
- But...
- Bring it on.
37
00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:29,130
Oh, it has been broughten.
38
00:01:31,590 --> 00:01:33,134
I'm just kidding around.
39
00:01:33,134 --> 00:01:35,178
He's a ten-year-old boy, now.
40
00:01:35,178 --> 00:01:37,514
He's made me proud
for a goddamn decade.
41
00:01:37,514 --> 00:01:38,806
He's been a real good bo.
42
00:01:38,806 --> 00:01:40,682
He's been such a bo.
43
00:01:40,682 --> 00:01:42,434
But he's a senior now.
44
00:01:42,434 --> 00:01:44,479
He's on the home stretch,
and I'm trying to let him
enjoy it.
45
00:01:44,479 --> 00:01:47,398
Snoozin' on the furniture,
lots of human food.
46
00:01:47,398 --> 00:01:48,941
Leash is so long now,
she's limp.
47
00:01:48,941 --> 00:01:50,568
And he's earned it.
48
00:01:50,568 --> 00:01:53,195
So you're just gonna
let him drop Baby Ruth's
all over the house?
49
00:01:53,195 --> 00:01:54,530
As opposed to what, Katy?
50
00:01:54,530 --> 00:01:56,324
Just give him
a real good, stern
talking to.
51
00:01:56,449 --> 00:01:58,076
Oh, yeah, and how's
that gonna shake down?
52
00:01:58,076 --> 00:01:59,368
He's probably
half fuckin' deaf.
53
00:01:59,368 --> 00:02:01,453
Aren't you,
you fuckin' geezer?
54
00:02:01,578 --> 00:02:03,998
The same way it shook down
for the last decade before
you stopped disciplining him,
55
00:02:03,998 --> 00:02:05,123
just 'cause he's old.
56
00:02:05,249 --> 00:02:08,128
Okay, Katy.
Katy, okay, I'm going in.
57
00:02:08,253 --> 00:02:09,838
Wish me luck.
58
00:02:09,838 --> 00:02:13,758
All right, was that you
leaving Crispy Crunchers
all over the floor?
59
00:02:13,758 --> 00:02:17,219
'Cause that's a bad dog,
don't you do that again,
that's bad.
60
00:02:17,219 --> 00:02:18,387
Lickety-split.
61
00:02:18,387 --> 00:02:19,389
Ah, that's a wee bit
aggressive.
62
00:02:19,389 --> 00:02:20,765
Oh is that what
I'm being, Dary?
63
00:02:20,765 --> 00:02:22,391
Well, that's your pal
you're talking to over there,
64
00:02:22,391 --> 00:02:24,393
fairly accusatory.
I'd say give him
benefit of the doubt.
65
00:02:24,393 --> 00:02:26,813
I wouldn't.
Well, you didn't even ask
him if he did it there.
66
00:02:26,813 --> 00:02:28,481
You just assumed,
I think you're better
than that.
67
00:02:28,606 --> 00:02:32,193
Okay, Dary. Dary, okay,
I'm going back in,
wish me luck.
68
00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:34,695
Aye.
69
00:02:34,695 --> 00:02:36,822
Was that you leaving
Jersey Milks on the floor?
70
00:02:36,822 --> 00:02:39,367
Because that's bad,
if that was you,
that was bad.
71
00:02:39,367 --> 00:02:41,785
Don't you do that
again ever,
'cause I'll be there.
72
00:02:42,619 --> 00:02:44,497
You're not taking
this seriously.
73
00:02:44,497 --> 00:02:46,082
Oh, is that what
I'm not doing, Katy?
74
00:02:46,082 --> 00:02:47,875
No, you're joking around
and he knows it.
75
00:02:47,875 --> 00:02:50,086
It's, "Bad boy,
this is a bad boy."
76
00:02:50,086 --> 00:02:53,213
Hey, he knows that
I'm joking but he doesn't
know that you're joking.
77
00:02:53,213 --> 00:02:55,758
Don't say "bad"
unless you mean bad.
78
00:02:55,758 --> 00:02:57,051
I'm sorry, Gus.
79
00:02:57,051 --> 00:02:59,928
That's okay, he's a good boy,
he's such a boy.
80
00:02:59,928 --> 00:03:03,099
Why don't you just try
using your real voice?
It may permeate better.
81
00:03:03,099 --> 00:03:05,684
Okay, Katy. Katy, okay,
I'm going back in.
82
00:03:05,809 --> 00:03:06,977
Wish me luck.
83
00:03:06,977 --> 00:03:08,605
Hey, bud.
84
00:03:08,605 --> 00:03:10,439
I noticed that you've
been leaving Caramilks
all over the floor,
85
00:03:10,439 --> 00:03:12,941
you know what's gonna
happen? Someone's gonna
step on one in the night
86
00:03:12,941 --> 00:03:15,986
and take a header,
someone's gonna pull
a full gainer down the stairs.
87
00:03:15,986 --> 00:03:17,529
Or at the very least,
a half gainer.
88
00:03:17,529 --> 00:03:20,491
So what you wanna do
is do that outside
like a good boy.
89
00:03:20,491 --> 00:03:21,576
Please and thanks.
90
00:03:22,367 --> 00:03:23,619
I thinks we're almost there.
91
00:03:23,619 --> 00:03:25,496
Oh, is that where
we almost are, Squirrelly Dan?
92
00:03:25,496 --> 00:03:27,790
Now, Professor Tricia says
that when you're bringing
a complaints to someone,
93
00:03:27,790 --> 00:03:30,375
they'll be more receptive
to altering their behavior
94
00:03:30,375 --> 00:03:31,961
if you make it
your problem.
95
00:03:31,961 --> 00:03:34,588
Make it personal
rather than placing
the blames on them.
96
00:03:34,713 --> 00:03:36,965
What are you fuckin'
getting on about
over there?
97
00:03:36,965 --> 00:03:39,385
May I's?
Okay, Dan. Dan, okay.
98
00:03:39,385 --> 00:03:40,928
Go on in, good luck.
99
00:03:42,220 --> 00:03:43,848
Gus, how are you now?
100
00:03:43,848 --> 00:03:46,475
Now, we've all noticed
the Coffee Crisps around
the house,
101
00:03:46,475 --> 00:03:50,104
and that's completely
natural and nothing for youse
to be embarrassed about.
102
00:03:50,104 --> 00:03:53,315
But I am quite worried
I am going to slip on one
and take a full gainer,
103
00:03:53,315 --> 00:03:55,401
or... Please look
at me when I'm talking, Gus.
104
00:03:55,401 --> 00:03:57,486
Now, while I know
that that is my problem,
105
00:03:57,486 --> 00:03:59,905
I know you don't want
this to happen any more
than I do.
106
00:03:59,905 --> 00:04:03,493
So I'm hoping we can
works together to find
a resolution to this problem.
107
00:04:03,493 --> 00:04:07,246
But besides that, we want you
to know, we think you're doing
a terrific job around here
108
00:04:07,246 --> 00:04:09,457
and we don't want
to bothers you anymore
than we needs to,
109
00:04:09,582 --> 00:04:12,334
so you have yourself
a great day.
110
00:04:12,334 --> 00:04:16,380
I'm not going to make you
sit through that butt-fuckery,
Bud, away you go.
111
00:04:16,380 --> 00:04:17,966
You're a good boy,
away you go.
112
00:04:17,966 --> 00:04:19,592
Away you go.
113
00:04:19,717 --> 00:04:21,551
Look, I know he's just
snoozing on the furniture
all day,
114
00:04:21,551 --> 00:04:24,137
but you take him out
for routine number twos.
115
00:04:24,137 --> 00:04:25,472
Ten-four?
116
00:04:25,472 --> 00:04:27,308
You try taking him out,
Katy, he don't wanna.
117
00:04:27,308 --> 00:04:29,519
You can say,
"Hey, Gus,
wanna rock one?"
118
00:04:29,519 --> 00:04:32,229
And if he could talk,
he'd say, "I've had to rock one
for a good seven, eight hours.
119
00:04:32,229 --> 00:04:34,106
"Don't worry about
that right now.
120
00:04:34,106 --> 00:04:36,567
"I'm gonna grab another
quick 20, 25 shut-eye here,
we'll circle back
121
00:04:36,567 --> 00:04:38,277
"on the conversation later.
122
00:04:38,402 --> 00:04:40,404
"But how about some good
itchings and scratchings
in the meantime?"
123
00:04:43,950 --> 00:04:45,743
Whoo!
124
00:04:45,743 --> 00:04:48,787
Smells like Mr. Wonka's
just emptied his pockets
in the other room.
125
00:04:48,912 --> 00:04:50,414
Fuck.
126
00:04:50,414 --> 00:04:54,043
Well, everybody up,
help me look.
127
00:04:54,043 --> 00:04:56,962
Better to be looking at it,
than looking for it, eh?
128
00:05:08,140 --> 00:05:10,310
Ladies.
Women.
129
00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:15,481
It has come to our attention
that there may be a young man
who has come between you girls.
130
00:05:15,481 --> 00:05:17,567
I mean...
How do you mean?
131
00:05:17,567 --> 00:05:19,861
Well, Betty-Anne,
Mary-Anne.
132
00:05:19,861 --> 00:05:22,904
We were told that you
may be going for
the same guy.
133
00:05:22,904 --> 00:05:27,327
Or, or that the same
guy may be going
for both of you.
134
00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:29,411
Impossible.
How do you mean?
135
00:05:29,411 --> 00:05:33,666
The last guy that was
into Mary-Anne was the priest
at Catholic school in grade six.
136
00:05:33,791 --> 00:05:35,418
And only 'cause he thought
she was a boy.
137
00:05:35,418 --> 00:05:38,171
Well done, Betty-Anne.
Catholic school, grade six.
138
00:05:38,296 --> 00:05:42,091
Isn't that the same year
you got the nickname
"Fisted Sister"?
139
00:05:42,091 --> 00:05:43,383
Which you gave yourself?
140
00:05:43,383 --> 00:05:44,760
Ladies.
"Women."
141
00:05:44,760 --> 00:05:47,012
And a fitting nickname
it was, Betty-Anne.
142
00:05:47,012 --> 00:05:50,140
Your mitt looks like
a boa constrictor
unhinged its jaw
143
00:05:50,140 --> 00:05:52,392
in an effort to consume
a combat submarine.
144
00:05:52,392 --> 00:05:54,020
BETTY-ANNE: Speaking
of consumption,
145
00:05:54,020 --> 00:05:56,688
your mitt looks like
the drooping jowls
of a shar-pei
146
00:05:56,813 --> 00:05:59,274
with a palsy
and a water wing
in its mouth.
147
00:05:59,274 --> 00:06:03,529
Your mitt looks like
the back of Kelsey Grammer's
head circa Frasier '94
148
00:06:03,529 --> 00:06:07,616
if the cast each autographed
his bald spot
with multi-colored lipsticks.
149
00:06:07,616 --> 00:06:10,620
Your mitt has more
spiderwebs than a No Doubt
set list, Mary-Anne.
150
00:06:10,620 --> 00:06:14,998
Betty-Anne, your mitt
is so dusty, I can hear it
singing Son of a Preacher Man.
151
00:06:16,750 --> 00:06:19,962
We've gotta go
to the source, buddy.
It's our only hope, buddy.
152
00:06:19,962 --> 00:06:21,923
Ferda.
153
00:06:21,923 --> 00:06:24,133
I'm not helping you
tit-fuckers or those twats.
154
00:06:24,133 --> 00:06:25,467
Give your balls
a tug.
155
00:06:25,467 --> 00:06:26,928
We're at the bottom
of the line here, Shoresy.
156
00:06:26,928 --> 00:06:28,762
You wanna talk about
lines, you fuckin' loser?
157
00:06:28,887 --> 00:06:31,681
I woke up to your mum
rippin' dick-dingers
off my foreskin,
158
00:06:31,681 --> 00:06:33,642
tell her to keep
her hands off my scoops.
159
00:06:33,642 --> 00:06:35,520
Fuck you,
Shoresy.
160
00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:38,147
Fuck you, Jonesy,
I made your mum cum
so hard
161
00:06:38,147 --> 00:06:41,818
they made a Canadian
Heritage Minute out of it and
Don McKellar played my dick.
162
00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:44,070
Fuck you, Shoresy.
Fuck you, Reilly.
163
00:06:44,070 --> 00:06:47,864
I made your mum so wet,
Trudeau deployed a 24-hour
infantry unit
164
00:06:47,864 --> 00:06:50,325
to stack sand bags
around my bed.
165
00:06:50,325 --> 00:06:52,036
Fuck you, Shoresy.
166
00:06:52,036 --> 00:06:54,205
Fuck you both,
your lives are so
fuckin' pathetic,
167
00:06:54,205 --> 00:06:58,418
I ran a charity 15K
to raise awareness for it,
you fuckin' losers.
168
00:07:06,383 --> 00:07:10,221
Where is he?
He was supposed to be
here an hour ago.
169
00:07:10,221 --> 00:07:13,599
Everyone stay composed.
I'm going to sever Everett's
phalanges one by one,
170
00:07:13,724 --> 00:07:15,767
and force-feed them
to him, fondue style.
171
00:07:15,767 --> 00:07:17,645
Your terms are
not acceptable, Roald.
172
00:07:17,645 --> 00:07:21,274
I'm going to rip off
his ears and use them
to tickle his taint.
173
00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:23,400
Oh, Jesus Christ.
174
00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:26,070
I'm going to scalp
him of his skin, wear it
like a costume, and perform
175
00:07:26,070 --> 00:07:29,823
The Rocky Horror Picture
Show in its entirety,
while he watches.
176
00:07:29,823 --> 00:07:31,993
I need to lie down.
177
00:07:33,327 --> 00:07:34,661
The end is nigh.
178
00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:36,914
Stewart!
179
00:07:36,914 --> 00:07:39,082
Would you come down
here, please?
180
00:07:43,671 --> 00:07:45,298
Everett.
181
00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:46,798
Hey, dude.
182
00:07:46,923 --> 00:07:49,051
Did you hear
all of that?
183
00:07:49,051 --> 00:07:52,555
Bits and pieces, something about
a picture show in the Rockies.
184
00:07:54,140 --> 00:07:55,640
Everett.
185
00:07:55,640 --> 00:07:57,517
Give me the...
186
00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:00,188
Stewart.
187
00:08:02,981 --> 00:08:04,108
Glen?
188
00:08:04,734 --> 00:08:06,109
Stewart.
189
00:08:07,777 --> 00:08:09,947
Glen.
This is...
190
00:08:09,947 --> 00:08:11,991
No it's not!
...an intervention.
191
00:08:12,116 --> 00:08:14,827
Roald.
Stewart...
192
00:08:14,827 --> 00:08:16,579
Roald!
193
00:08:16,579 --> 00:08:18,205
Stewart.
194
00:08:20,791 --> 00:08:22,376
Unhand Roaldie.
195
00:08:25,671 --> 00:08:26,796
Come.
196
00:08:28,049 --> 00:08:29,133
Sit.
197
00:08:31,844 --> 00:08:32,719
Stay.
198
00:08:32,844 --> 00:08:35,431
But...
199
00:08:35,431 --> 00:08:36,556
Oh, I like you.
200
00:08:37,391 --> 00:08:38,809
You're coming
with me and Glen.
201
00:08:39,227 --> 00:08:40,353
Where?
202
00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:43,355
To a place where
you can get away.
203
00:08:43,355 --> 00:08:44,397
Yeah.
204
00:08:44,397 --> 00:08:46,275
You can't mean...
Oh, yes, Stewart.
205
00:08:46,275 --> 00:08:48,777
You don't mean...
Yes, Stewart.
206
00:08:48,777 --> 00:08:49,945
No!
Stewart...
207
00:08:49,945 --> 00:08:51,613
You're going to rehab.
208
00:08:51,613 --> 00:08:53,240
No!
Yes.
209
00:08:53,240 --> 00:08:54,700
No.
Yes.
210
00:08:54,825 --> 00:08:56,160
No!
211
00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:58,329
Yes.
212
00:09:02,749 --> 00:09:04,252
Ladies.
213
00:09:04,709 --> 00:09:06,086
Women.
214
00:09:06,086 --> 00:09:07,754
Sorry.
It's okay.
215
00:09:07,754 --> 00:09:09,632
Um, we spoke with
Shoresy.
216
00:09:09,632 --> 00:09:10,758
You did?
And?
217
00:09:10,758 --> 00:09:13,551
And he, um...
What?
218
00:09:13,551 --> 00:09:15,179
He said...
What?
219
00:09:16,180 --> 00:09:18,431
He said you suck
at hockey.
220
00:09:20,892 --> 00:09:24,021
Huh?
Yeah, he said
you should stick
221
00:09:24,021 --> 00:09:25,815
to Ringette.
Huh?
222
00:09:25,815 --> 00:09:30,735
Yeah, he said that you
should never ever let
a woman do a man's job.
223
00:09:30,860 --> 00:09:32,405
He did?
Yeah.
224
00:09:32,530 --> 00:09:36,283
I was standing there like,
"What is this guy saying?"
225
00:09:36,408 --> 00:09:38,578
And then he said,
"Who let the broads out
of the kitchen?"
226
00:09:38,703 --> 00:09:39,911
He did not.
Yeah.
227
00:09:39,911 --> 00:09:42,123
And we were like,
"What?
228
00:09:42,123 --> 00:09:43,958
"You can't say that."
And he's like,
229
00:09:43,958 --> 00:09:46,668
"Yeah, I can. They should be
making me my supper."
230
00:09:46,668 --> 00:09:47,920
And I was,
"Whoa, dude."
231
00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:49,754
Did he?
Yeah.
232
00:09:49,754 --> 00:09:53,843
I mean, we're like,
"Dude, you're crazy."
233
00:09:53,843 --> 00:09:57,220
Then he said, "I mean,
how'd they find time
for hockey,
234
00:09:57,220 --> 00:09:59,764
"while they're cleaning
the floors and doing
my laundry."
235
00:09:59,764 --> 00:10:01,392
Did he?
Yeah,
236
00:10:01,392 --> 00:10:03,853
and that's not even...
That's not even
the craziest part.
237
00:10:03,853 --> 00:10:05,771
Like we were...
And believe us,
238
00:10:05,896 --> 00:10:07,815
we had had enough
at this point, but
we were like,
239
00:10:07,815 --> 00:10:09,233
"Are you sure
about this?"
240
00:10:09,233 --> 00:10:12,570
And he was like,
"Anybody can go
back-to-back."
241
00:10:12,570 --> 00:10:16,824
Yeah, and we're like,
"Dude, you better stop
talking about those girls
242
00:10:16,824 --> 00:10:18,283
"like that."
Mmm.
243
00:10:18,283 --> 00:10:20,536
"Better stop talking
about those women
like that."
244
00:10:20,536 --> 00:10:23,748
But he said, "Talk to me
when they go back-to-back-
245
00:10:24,415 --> 00:10:25,583
"to-back."
246
00:10:25,583 --> 00:10:26,541
That's what he said.
247
00:10:30,128 --> 00:10:31,254
Mary-Anne.
Betty-Anne.
248
00:10:31,254 --> 00:10:32,506
What rhymes with
hip, lip and dip?
249
00:10:32,506 --> 00:10:33,924
Ship.
What rhymes with
coat, note and tote?
250
00:10:33,924 --> 00:10:35,468
Boat.
Why don't you say
you, me and the girls
251
00:10:35,593 --> 00:10:36,676
put another one
on the water?
252
00:10:36,676 --> 00:10:38,637
Back-to-back-to-back!
253
00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:26,161
You're driving.
Would if I could,
but I can't.
254
00:12:26,161 --> 00:12:27,872
Okay.
You boys leaning
into one tonight?
255
00:12:27,872 --> 00:12:30,166
Well, it's better to
be looking at it
than looking for it.
256
00:12:30,166 --> 00:12:32,167
How about our
very own Shamrockettes?
257
00:12:32,167 --> 00:12:33,710
Playing for
the fuckin' 'ship.
258
00:12:33,710 --> 00:12:35,336
When a local team plays
for the championship,
that's something
259
00:12:35,336 --> 00:12:37,131
the whole town
can get behind.
260
00:12:37,256 --> 00:12:38,590
Creates a pretty good
sense of community, too.
261
00:12:38,715 --> 00:12:40,301
And a series sweeps,
no less.
262
00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:42,011
A wee bit
of Meryl Sweep.
263
00:12:42,011 --> 00:12:43,094
Sweep in
wolf's clothing.
264
00:12:43,219 --> 00:12:44,972
The lion sweeps tonight.
265
00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:48,309
Drive safe.
266
00:12:48,309 --> 00:12:49,935
Stewart gets out
of rehab today,
so I'm keeping it local.
267
00:12:49,935 --> 00:12:51,479
Pitter-patter.
268
00:12:58,067 --> 00:12:59,069
Wayne.
Dwayne.
269
00:12:59,069 --> 00:12:59,945
Daryl.
Cheryl.
270
00:13:00,070 --> 00:13:01,070
Dan.
Pam.
271
00:13:01,070 --> 00:13:02,406
See youse brought your brooms.
272
00:13:02,406 --> 00:13:04,240
Shop's nothing but a couple
side-roads down, though.
273
00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:07,411
Oh, youse didn't hear?
We're working for
Sweep Country Canada now.
274
00:13:07,411 --> 00:13:08,786
Don't fear the sweeper.
275
00:13:08,912 --> 00:13:10,372
Why don't you use
those brooms and show us
276
00:13:10,372 --> 00:13:12,123
that little dance
those fellows do
in Mary Poppins?
277
00:13:12,123 --> 00:13:14,292
If we offer you a beer
are we sweeping
with the enemies, or...
278
00:13:14,292 --> 00:13:17,879
You should've used those brooms
to sweep the cobwebs off
of Letterkenny's trophy case.
279
00:13:17,879 --> 00:13:19,714
Well, it's good you got
the beer sorted,
280
00:13:19,714 --> 00:13:22,383
but is that Donegal
tap water still stinky, or...
281
00:13:22,383 --> 00:13:24,386
Youse got a liberal
amount of beer there,
282
00:13:24,386 --> 00:13:27,223
not sure it's gonna be
enough to drown your sorrows
after we shit-kick youse today.
283
00:13:27,223 --> 00:13:29,057
Youse are on the brink
of elimination,
284
00:13:29,057 --> 00:13:30,810
read it and sweep.
Hey.
285
00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:33,436
Win or lose, youse guys
have still got the most
ostrich-fuckers
286
00:13:33,436 --> 00:13:34,562
per capita, right?
287
00:13:34,562 --> 00:13:35,897
That's the big picture.
288
00:13:35,897 --> 00:13:37,815
Allegedlys.
289
00:13:37,941 --> 00:13:38,901
Bet you wish you could
put your head in the sand
and ignore that one, huh?
290
00:13:38,901 --> 00:13:40,860
May the best town win.
291
00:13:47,033 --> 00:13:50,079
Ladies.
None finer than you,
Mary-Anne.
292
00:13:50,079 --> 00:13:51,287
Women.
293
00:13:51,287 --> 00:13:53,748
None more admirable
than you, Betty-Anne.
294
00:13:53,748 --> 00:13:55,501
We've overcome adversity.
295
00:13:55,501 --> 00:13:57,293
Found a way to win.
296
00:14:00,339 --> 00:14:03,926
Let's get this fucking win,
let's get this fucking sweep!
297
00:14:03,926 --> 00:14:08,430
And let's get this
luxury fucking
sea liner on the lake!
298
00:14:11,767 --> 00:14:13,768
League final, buddy.
Game four, buddy.
299
00:14:13,768 --> 00:14:15,979
Suits on deck.
What could go wrong?
300
00:14:18,147 --> 00:14:20,526
Shoresy?
Give your balls a tug.
301
00:14:20,526 --> 00:14:21,902
Shoresy!
Tit-fuckers.
302
00:14:21,902 --> 00:14:24,363
We heard what you said
about us, you sack of shit.
303
00:14:24,488 --> 00:14:26,114
"Never let a woman do
a man's job," huh?
304
00:14:26,114 --> 00:14:29,368
Watch this, we're just taking
a break from cooking
and cleaning to win
305
00:14:29,493 --> 00:14:31,619
back-to-back-to-back
'ships, asshole.
306
00:14:31,619 --> 00:14:33,538
I'll make you a sandwich
afterwards, though,
307
00:14:33,538 --> 00:14:35,373
I'll shove it up
your ass for you, too.
308
00:14:35,373 --> 00:14:37,959
You two are the silliest
twats I've ever met
in my whole fuckin' life.
309
00:14:37,959 --> 00:14:41,088
I didn't say any
of that shit,
you dumb broads.
310
00:14:41,088 --> 00:14:43,965
But I did say your breath
could stop a Mack Truck,
Betty-Anne,
311
00:14:43,965 --> 00:14:46,051
I'll tell that to anyone
who will listen.
312
00:14:46,051 --> 00:14:47,719
Fuck you, Shoresy.
313
00:14:47,719 --> 00:14:50,556
Fuck you, Betty-Anne,
your breath is an
existential crisis,
314
00:14:50,556 --> 00:14:52,349
made me question
my whole fuckin' life.
315
00:14:52,349 --> 00:14:54,142
Fuck you, Shoresy.
316
00:14:54,142 --> 00:14:57,186
Fuck you, Mary-Anne,
you got legs on you
like redwoods,
317
00:14:57,186 --> 00:14:58,689
you could box-jump
a bungalow.
318
00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:00,315
Fuck you, Shoresy.
319
00:15:00,315 --> 00:15:03,527
Fuck you, Reilly,
your mum groped me
two Halloweens ago,
320
00:15:03,527 --> 00:15:05,528
shut the fuck up
or I'll take it to Twitter.
321
00:15:05,528 --> 00:15:06,988
Fuck you, Shoresy.
322
00:15:06,988 --> 00:15:08,532
You're a horrible
fuckin' ref.
323
00:15:08,532 --> 00:15:10,825
Fuck you, Jonesy,
take a look at me,
I'm not even a ref,
324
00:15:10,825 --> 00:15:14,662
I'm a fuckin' linesman,
but you can referee on
my nuts, you piece of shit.
325
00:15:14,662 --> 00:15:16,080
Fuck you, Shoresy!
326
00:15:16,205 --> 00:15:18,626
I'd still smash you both
if I was bored,
327
00:15:18,626 --> 00:15:21,003
but Reilly and Jonesy's
mums get too jealous.
328
00:15:21,003 --> 00:15:23,756
Make yourselves useful,
grab me a bag of
dill picklers.
329
00:15:23,756 --> 00:15:26,215
Good luck, you fuckin' losers.
330
00:15:27,801 --> 00:15:29,427
Let's stick it
to that fuck.
331
00:15:29,427 --> 00:15:31,180
Literally and figuratively.
332
00:15:31,180 --> 00:15:33,014
Who the fuck
skates like that?
333
00:15:38,561 --> 00:15:40,730
Stewart's recovery
has been...
334
00:15:41,272 --> 00:15:42,733
Remarkable.
335
00:15:45,444 --> 00:15:46,987
He is almost...
336
00:15:47,945 --> 00:15:49,364
Unrecognizable.
337
00:15:50,699 --> 00:15:54,203
Are you ready?
338
00:15:54,203 --> 00:15:55,454
Ready!
339
00:15:55,454 --> 00:15:57,205
Calm down, Roald.
340
00:15:57,205 --> 00:15:58,081
Stewart!
341
00:16:13,347 --> 00:16:15,181
Fuck the wave,
pull your finger
out of your ass.
342
00:16:15,181 --> 00:16:16,934
I remember when
you could smoke in here.
343
00:16:16,934 --> 00:16:18,643
Yeah, we're gonna smoke
youse in here, bud.
344
00:16:18,643 --> 00:16:20,896
Came here to do
two things,
345
00:16:20,896 --> 00:16:23,607
launch this broom on the ice
and drink, and the gal at the
bar just told me I'm cut off.
346
00:16:23,607 --> 00:16:25,234
Your gals look slower
than my tractor,
347
00:16:25,234 --> 00:16:26,609
of course, mine's
got a HEMI in her.
348
00:16:26,609 --> 00:16:28,027
Your gals are having
a tougher time
349
00:16:28,152 --> 00:16:31,364
finding the puck
than NHL on Fox
circa 1996.
350
00:16:31,364 --> 00:16:33,242
I've seen more
hustle in chess.
351
00:16:33,242 --> 00:16:37,579
Still no heaters in here,
eh? I remember Letterkenny
mounting the 50.
352
00:16:37,579 --> 00:16:42,834
Let's go, Shamrockettes!
353
00:16:44,628 --> 00:16:46,213
Let's go, Shamrockettes.
354
00:16:53,262 --> 00:16:54,887
Pass to me!
355
00:17:23,583 --> 00:17:26,628
Okay, ladies...
"Women."
356
00:17:26,628 --> 00:17:30,089
Hurry up and score
a fuckin' goal already, I'm
getting the bedtime sillies.
357
00:17:30,089 --> 00:17:32,467
Fuck off, Shoresy,
give us our time-out.
358
00:17:32,467 --> 00:17:34,970
Fuck you, Reilly,
tell your mum
to give me a time-out.
359
00:17:34,970 --> 00:17:38,139
The last time I tried that,
she threatened to take
a header on me
360
00:17:38,139 --> 00:17:40,224
into an empty pool
at the Quality Suites.
361
00:17:40,224 --> 00:17:42,226
Fuck you, Shoresy,
leave us alone.
362
00:17:42,226 --> 00:17:44,521
Fuck you, Jonesy,
tell your mum
to leave me alone,
363
00:17:44,521 --> 00:17:47,191
she's been laying
in my fuckin' water bed
since Labor Day.
364
00:17:47,191 --> 00:17:48,900
Fuck you, Shoresy.
365
00:17:49,025 --> 00:17:52,154
Fuck you all,
your lives are so sad,
I get a charity tax break
366
00:17:52,154 --> 00:17:53,405
just for hanging out
with you.
367
00:17:53,405 --> 00:17:56,116
Nice sweep, no sweep,
give your balls a tug.
368
00:18:02,039 --> 00:18:04,207
Enough fuckin' around.
Let's do this.
369
00:19:24,955 --> 00:19:30,377
Shamrockettes!
370
00:19:50,187 --> 00:19:51,481
We did it, buddy.
371
00:19:52,523 --> 00:19:54,109
Can't believe it, buddy.
372
00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:59,156
We won
a fuckin' 'ship.
373
00:19:59,156 --> 00:20:00,616
We bought
that boat.
374
00:20:26,683 --> 00:20:27,850
Hmm.
375
00:20:29,770 --> 00:20:31,187
Yeah, it's Mum.
376
00:20:31,187 --> 00:20:34,483
Mine too.
Probably wanna say
congratulations.
29497
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