All language subtitles for Chance In A Million s03e04 The Once And Future Chance

Here I go again.

I hear the trumpet blow again.

Oh, what a blow again.

Taking a chance on love.

Here I slide again.

About to take that ride again.

Starry -eyed again.

Taken, taken a chance on love.

Hello?

Oh, hello, Mummy.

Yes, it's me, Mummy.

Mother, there's nothing to reconsider.
Tom and I are engaged to be married, and

that's that.

Oh, don't cry, Mummy.

Hello, Daddy.

Oh, she's always threatening that sort
of thing. You know she never means it.

I suppose she's going to cut some bread
or something.

Well, look, you get her down to casualty
and I'll ring later on to see how she

is.

Phone, was it?

Yeah. Mother again?

Afraid so, Tom.

You're very opposed to our marriage.

I mean, the latest thing is, what if
there were any children?

Wonderful. Oh, do you think so, Tom?

No, no.

Discovered entitled to water rights an
entire section of River Guadalquivir.

And marital rights in women in
surrounding five villages.

That's nice.

Not been claimed since 1634, but worth
investigating.

Not really up to family trees at the
moment.

Oh, shame, just found branch going back
to 1512.

How's yours going?

Oh, I'm still stuck at 1947.

It'd be much easier if Mummy just told
me her age.

Really, I don't think there's anyone
interesting in our family, Tom. Oh,

like the sound of your great -aunt, um,
you know, um, one who was suffragette.

Oh, great -aunt Ruby, yes, well... She
was involved with the suffragettes, Tom.

She used to try and break up their
meetings waving a sampler that says a

place is in the home.

It's not quite as exciting as
discovering you've inherited a title.

Oh, just coincidence, Alison.

Till last Tuesday, still 19th in line.

If the entire family had been mistaken
for Mafia Drugs Conference and poisoned

in Bogota, it would still probably be
19th in line.

Pretty meaningless sort of title,
anyway.

I don't see anything meaningless in
being Marquess of Valdonis, Tom.

Knight Commendatore of the Order of
Centaurelius and Constable of the Twin

Towers of Cothedon.

In fact, I think that's why Mr. Winton
wanted you as Godfather this afternoon.

Oh, that reminds me. The piston mug's
arrived.

Yes, yes, thank you. You must have
wondered why he asked me. My disability,

sort of person people usually avoid.

I think it's jolly lucky to get you,
Tom.

I think you make a lovely Godfather.

Oh, Father.

Hardly, Alison.

Why?

Depressing subject, children. Got a few
hours to spare. Happy to talk to you

about it. Well, let's talk about it now,
Tom.

Fine. Well... Ah.

Excuse me.

Ignorant tussocks, you know.

Wrongly inscribed again.

To Chief Stewardess Denise from Flight
Crew of BA617.

Welcome to Three Mile High Club.

I hope we're not too late, Tom. We've
got a bit held up.

Yes, Terence insisted on commemorating
the christening day by having his photo

taken naked on a bare skin rug.

Ah, rather you than me, Wyndron. Prefer
suit and tie on that sort of occasion.

Hello, Maxime.

Mummy'd rather have a large gin and
tonic, but a cup of tea would be lovely,

Alison. Right, Barbara, I want a little
chin work, anyway.

Ooh, right.

What's he got to tell?

Girl talk.

Ah, drink, Wingent? You wouldn't have a
small glass of sherry, would you? No,

thanks. Prefer lager.

How about you?

Thank you. Yes.

It's awfully good of you to look after
the little chap like this. It'll only be

for a couple of hours.

Oh, thank you. I don't suppose you know
her, but we've... We've asked Lady

Stockbridge to be godmother, and we're
giving her a bite of lunch at the...

Amanda Hawksworth. Pardon? Amanda
Hawksworth. Used to be at Egham County

School together.

Remarkable teeth.

Once saw her bite nose off rocking
horse.

Ready for top -up? Thank you, I'm doing
fine.

Alison and I are going to have another
go at it.

Getting married.

So too.

Yes, um, we've seen the rector this
morning, actually, about another day.

His wife's been on holiday rather a long
time, hasn't she? Nearly a year now.

She's staying with her sister in New
Zealand. I wanted to ask him about it,

he hasn't been in the library for quite
a while.

When his wife was around, he used to
spend whole days in there.

Actually, Angela from Overdue Reminders
wondered if there hadn't been a bit of,

you know... Well, yes, there was a
rather embarrassing photograph you see

Son Born Echo.

It showed the rector with his half
-naked girl in a compromising position

Tom's hall.

There was a perfectly simple
explanation.

Well, there always is with Tom.

Well, I wonder why the rector didn't sue
and demand an apology.

Well, at least that would have stopped
his wife from leaving. Yes, and saved

a great deal of loneliness and hardship
into the bargain.

Yes.

Barbara, when you first discovered that
you were having a baby, how did you

break the news to Mr. Wingent?

Oh, well, looking back on it, not very
well, really. I left him a note on his

desk at the library saying, I'm
pregnant.

Sign B.

It took him 24 hours to find out it was
from me.

I've never seen a man so frightened.

Yes, but when he realised it was you, he
was pleased, wasn't he?

Oh, well, surprised, really.

And a bit more reconciled to it once he
got the blood test back.

Oh, you know, motherhood's a wonderful
thing, Alison.

It's just the baby that's the problem.

Anyway, not that any of that need worry
you. Oh, that's great!

Um, no, I won't, thanks. Why not,
Barbara?

Well, apart from anything else, I'm
trying to get my figure back.

No, why does it not bother me?

Well, you did go and see Dr. Fellows,
didn't you?

Well, you're all right then.

I remember reading somewhere that the
statistics of the pill not working were,

what, one in a million?

That's what bothers me.

I'm sorry. I wasn't here to greet you,
for we caught our first rabbit on the

common, and we're rather overexcited.

I just have to persuade him either to
kill it or let it go.

Well, I must say, he's bearing up better
than I expected.

Rumour going round the club that wife
expects him to come back.

Remember Bill Hartley, second clip?

No. Yes. Got cousin in Auckland, lives
with Maori, who sometimes does gardening

for Mrs. Dodge's sister, reckons...

Mrs Dodge, thinking of giving Rector
second chance.

That's poor news, Tom. You must tell
him. No, no, no. Best not raise hopes.

just be locker room gossip.

My apologies for keeping you.

And for not thanking you earlier for
that beautiful bottle of Armagnac. Tom

thought she deserved a treat, Rector.
You've had some difficult times.

We broached it at the vestry meeting
with some rather fine broadleaf cabanas

from Mr Patel at the newsagents.

Your people have been most terribly
kind, you know.

I received this yesterday from the
British Legion.

I thought we might... I thought you
might need these.

Oh, thank you, Maggie. Would it be all
right if I did Mrs. Newsome's cottage

for lunch? Then I could do you Brigadier
Cowley's pheasant for tonight.

That sounds most acceptable, Maggie.

Such a nice girl.

She and her baby daughter have most of
the upper floor in return for a

bit of housekeeping.

Anyway, what can I do for you? Well,
really, I'd like to make a new

for the wedding. Yet we wondered if the
15th was free.

Yes. Yes, we haven't had a lot of luck
with our earlier attempts, have we?

Last time with that articulated lorry
jackknifing across the aisle.

No, I thought that was... Time before,
love.

No, that was when the Puerto Ricans took
sanctuary during the... No, no, no, no,

surely. That was trainload of nuclear
waste overturned in cemetery.

No, no, that was four times ago, Tom.
Probably right. Anyway, I couldn't help

wondering if we didn't see the workings
of a divine hand here, that perhaps it

was time to call it a day. No?

No?

Well, it got quite determined, I'll say
no more.

The 15th it is.

Splendid.

Who's this little chap, then?
MacMillian. Winchurch. Yes, you're

this afternoon.

Good, good.

Such a pity they have to grow into
children.

Yes.

Remember, most eloquent sermon you
delivered, Rector, on subject of

marriage of waiting before children.

Ah. How long do you have to wait?

Rector recommended 15, 20 years.

Yes. I think it's important that you
have time to get to know each other.

And Kate has all been a ghastly mistake.

Which reminds me, my wife, who thanks
you very much, Alison, for your

sent you this Maori souvenir and a
wedding present.

You've heard the rumour that she might
be coming back?

Well, I cabled her to tell her that if
her sister needed her, she must not

about me.

Still exciting to think the phone might
ring any moment now saying, Mrs. Dodge

at Heathrow.

What is it,

Maggie? Your wife just rang. She's at
Heathrow.

Good!

Good. She says she'll make her own way
down.

Thank you, Maggie.

Allow me, please. Thank you so much.

May I?

Well, we'll be off then, Tom.

Yes. That's wonderful news, Richter.
Yes, isn't it?

Yes, yes. Hope to see you both at
Christening this afternoon.

Christening? Oh, yes.

Look, would you mind taking the dog out
of the house for a few hours, would you?

Because Mrs Dodge isn't very fond of
animals.

Not at all. No problem.

Just until I make a few phone calls and
find him a new home.

Pleasure.

You'll find him very obedient and
willing.

A good friend.

I shall miss him rather. You'll be all
right, but you're very happy to take

That's very kind.

She won't have chickens in the garden
either.

Oh, well.

Bang over fresh eggs.

got everything.

Oh, no, it's just the chemis now, Tom.

I promised the rector I'd get some of
that cream that takes the back of stains

off teeth.

Ah, it's just going to get gristening,
Mike.

Never volunteer for anything.

You weren't in the army, were you,
Tommy? Nearly involved in Fulton's war.

Argentinian embassy sent me call -up
papers.

Go on.

Mommy can't be far.

I read to her to try and call her from
there. I think we might call the police

from there.

Right.

Don't we see any more prams on the way?
I hope we leave them where they are.

Some more children.

Good, good.

Could we possibly use your telephone?

Please come in. Thank you.

feel sorry for.

It's the special crimes boys, you see.
Think you'll find sugar kept with

biscuits, Walter. Oh, thanks.

Yes.

They're so quick to think of the bad
side in everything.

I don't understand how they got down to
the rectory so quickly.

Oh, well, that was Mrs Nicholls. Mrs
Nicholls? Wasn't that woman caught in

park lift?

Well, she was, but she climbed out
through the emergency hatch, pulled

200 feet up the cable onto the roof.

And from there, she saw you wheeling the
twins up the rectory drive.

Impressive climb for a woman in her late
70s. Yes.

But once on the roof, she tore sections
of the parapet with her bare hands, made

an ingenious sling out of a corset, and
started firing chunks of masonry into

the Social Security office's opposite to
attract attention.

Met her downstairs.

Frankly glad she was still strapped to
stretcher.

Sergeant...

I seem to remember from Persian Act that
one is allowed one telephone call in

here. I ought to let my wife know I've
been arrested.

No, no, Mr Dodge, not arrested. Sergeant
Gop here sorted it all out.

Oh, you mean I don't have to stay here?

No, no, you get straight back to your
wife, Padre. Just return from New

She'll have plenty to say to you.

Yes.

Yes, she probably will.

Well... I suppose I'd better be running
along.

It's nice to know he's going to a good
home. Yes.

Thanks for the tea, Sergeant.

Goodbye, Boffet.

Be a good dog.

I never thought I would visit Lady
Stockbridge in a police cell. Oh,

don't think you know... Maximilian,
future godmother, handcuffed to a bed.

poor woman had her baby stolen from
outside.

thinking the pervert who took it was
arrested for shoplifting.

No question of shoplifting, Mrs.
Wingent. We put her in a police belt for

the noses of a shop assistant and two of
my constables.

Same old Amanda.

Quite frankly, she's lucky not to be in
charge. It's all right, darling.

I've found him. He's quite unharmed.
Yes, and you've got young Alison to

for looking after him. She's been like a
mother to all of them.

There's no doubt about it, Tom. She's
got away with children.

She got away with seven this morning,
according to the local radio.

He's smiling. You see, he knows.

it is.

Barbara, just wanted to check,
christening this afternoon... Yes, Tom,

cancelled it. Despite having 45 guests
waiting at the church, three of whom

flown in specially from Bahrain, now we
decided that since we had no baby, no

vicar and no godparents, there really
wasn't a great deal of point in

continuing. It's at times like this that
you really realise what they mean to

you, isn't it? Here you are, Barbara.

Little Maximilian, all safe and sound.

Oh, thank you, Alison.

Oh, Joseph!

Oh, it's a girl, is it?

Sex never was your strong point, was it,
Terrence?

I find it hard to tell one from the
other.

Not impressed.

Aren't you, Tom?

No, frankly, asked to look after baby
for a couple of hours. Turns out to be

Beth's part of day.

Just walk off. Not a word of thanks.

Bad manners, Alison.

Plain bad manners. Oh, they've had a
very emotional time, Tom.

Yes, you sit down and have a nice cup of
tea, Miss Little, you've earned it.

Oh, thank you.

Yes, with all those children, God knows
where we'd have been without you.

Oh, I don't know. Your Sergeant Mullins
seemed very competent.

He made them a little mobile out of
handcuffs and truncheons.

Lady Stockbridge collected the right
baby when she left, I hope? Yes, she

yes, and her dog.

Do you know, in many ways, I think she
was more concerned about her dog.

She said she spent three months training
it to roll over on its back when you

say, die for your country.

Ah.

Anything the matter, Tom?

Could just be coincidence.

was hardest hit.

Losing wife for good like that.

Really? Thought showed remarkable
courage, though. Leading sing -song in

Just to keep up morale.

Know where wife went?

No. Mexico.

Apparently, on visiting son there in
labour camp last year, was so impressed

local jailers that they offered her job
as wardress.

Tom?

I'm sorry today didn't work out better.

It's probably put you off the idea of
having any children at all.

No, no, no. Nothing to do with that,
Alison.

Nothing. A cross I have to bear.

Faced fact long ago.

Children out of the question for me.

A slice of cake.

Good God.

Chemistry set.

Whose is this?

Mine.

Show you how to make small...

Where's the rest of the set?

That's it.

What? Rather mean.

No copper sulphate?

I thought all chemistry sets had copper
sulphate.

Tom, why mustn't you have any children?

Made in Belgium.

You're always so good with them.

Love them, Alison.

Just have to face fact.

Mustn't ever have any of my own.

Of course.

Always cherished dream of raising WG
Grace of the 21st century.

Opportunity to inculcate good habits
from earliest years. Straight bat,

left wrist, learning to take bowling
ball by ball. But why mustn't you have

Alison, imagine life like mine, dogged
by disaster, plagued by coincidence.

Knowingly pass on disability.

Couldn't live with guilt.

have a child unknowingly.

Ah. In answer to your question, Tom,
it's a pregnancy testing

kit.

What question?

It's mine.

Sure.

Positive.

Positively all clear or...

Positively what?

It's positively what Tom?

the wedding anymore.

Thank you.