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Narrator: Coming up, what's
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got Joe and murr bumping and
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grinding?
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Yeah!
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Narrator: Do the jokers have
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too much on their plates?
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Potatoes flying everywhere!
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Narrator: And the most
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surprising punishment ever.
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It's Rosie O'Donnell!
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Today, we're teaming up at
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melody lanes in Brooklyn.
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Hitting pins and taking frames.
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While interacting with the
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other turkeys, we'll have to do
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and say what the other team
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tells us.
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If you refuse to do or say
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anything, you're in the gutter.
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Could you guys spare me the
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bowling puns?
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I made one, too!
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Yahtzee!
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Just like old times.
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Yep.
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You know, Joe and I were on
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the bowling team together in
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high school.
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Want to go out there and take
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their lunch money.
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Hey, man.
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Here we go.
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Oh, wow.
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These look like bowlers with
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no Patience for men like Murray
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and Joe.
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See if they want appletinis.
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So, do you guys want a round
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of appletinis?
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Murr, when his ball comes
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back out, grab it first and
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smell it.
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What's that?
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Sorry. I was just smelling that
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one.
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Sorry about that.
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Just to see what it smells
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like.
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Yeah.
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When Murray goes, trash-talk
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him, but, like, crazy
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inappropriate.
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You suck.
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Gutter ball.
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Gutter ball. You suck.
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Your mother's a whore.
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Works every time.
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Celebrate like crazy.
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Murr, back him up.
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Both: Yeah! Yeah!
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Yeah! Yeah!
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Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
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Yeah! Yeah!
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You saw that nine?!
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Yeah! Yeah!
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You saw that nine?!
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You saw that nine!
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Yeah!
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Sit down on the Lane and
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massage each other's feet.
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Yeah, exactly what you're
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thinking is what I want you
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to do.
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A double... a double massage.
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It's a double foot massage.
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Oh, my god.
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Oh, my god.
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You really got to work on the
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7-10 split.
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Yeah.
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These guys are
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getting so uncomfortable, man.
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Have you guys seen the
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waitress?
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We're still waiting on our
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appletinis.
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Do I just bowl?
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You can either bowl or go
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hunt a gazelle.
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Whatever you want to do with
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that shirt.
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Sal, don't let him get too close
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to your panda shirt.
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He might attack.
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You look like fat Tarzan.
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How you doing, guys?
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All right, fellas, we want
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you to European kiss after every
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turn you bowl.
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So, like the two cheeks?
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Yeah.
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Hey! All right!
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All right!
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Both: Hey! Mwah! Mwah!
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Yeah!
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They all... they all just
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looked at you.
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Do it again.
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Aww! I thought you would've
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picked that up.
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It's all right, it's all right.
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Both: Mwah! Mwah!
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Mwah! Mwah!
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Okay, now, sal, he just
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bowled, so give him a European
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kiss.
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Hey!
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Mwah!
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Yeah.
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Mwah!
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Sal, bowl like a lady, buddy.
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A proper woman.
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Oh, my god.
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This is hard to watch.
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Walk back with attitude.
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Girlfriend.
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Come on! Come on!
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Oh, he missed it.
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Sal, give him a hug... a long
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hug.
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Sorry, bud.
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Hold that embrace.
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Sal, start petting q's mane.
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Start petting his mane.
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They're all staring!
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Now big break... say, "okay,
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let's go!"
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All right, let's go.
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I'm stewing in the
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humiliation.
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Q, when this guy reaches for
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the ball, grab his hand.
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Look him in the eye and say,
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"hey."
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Hey.
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"You're a hell of a bowler."
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You're a hell of a bowler.
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"For a woman."
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For...
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you're a hell of a bowler.
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Boom!
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Sorry.
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I was looking him in the eyes.
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Two turkeys!
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That's what you are.
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Your nickname should be
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gutter ball.
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Narrator: Q and sal are in a
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league of their own on the loser
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board.
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You guys ever enter a
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tournament?
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I was in a karate tournament.
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What? You?
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I didn't know that!
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I was in grade school.
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I got eliminated first round.
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I always wanted to take
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karate.
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My parents wouldn't let me.
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My mother was afraid I was gonna
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break my nose.
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Ironically, I got my nose broke
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in a fight because I couldn't
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defend myself.
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We're here at redd's restaurant
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and bar, adding food to people's
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plates.
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Armed with this bowl of
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mashed potatoes, the goal is to
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dole out as many scoops as
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possible until you're asked to
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stop.
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Whoever serves the fewest
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scoops loses.
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Important note... we don't
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work here, and they didn't order
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potatoes!
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But they're gonna get them!
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All right, bud, go get them.
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Let's serve up some potatoes.
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I'll tell you what... i'm
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really nervous.
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They just got their food.
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You're just a grown man
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holding a bowl of potatoes.
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1, 2, potatoes.
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Here he goes.
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With the potatoes.
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You're gonna want to share them,
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but you don't have to.
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They're mashed.
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Right there is where you want
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to go.
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Look at her, look at her.
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Knock knock.
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Potatoes.
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Oh! Whoa!
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Here's some.
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Thank you.
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I don't wo... I don't...
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I don't work here.
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No.
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No, wait! They're handing it
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back!
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You left her holding her
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plate up.
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I didn't think he was gonna
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get that many scoops.
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Ha!
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This is... I'm really
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nervous.
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It's terrifying when you're down
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here with 8 pounds of potatoes.
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Good luck beating all my
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scoops, buddy.
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Oh, my god.
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You're coming out of the gate
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with a lot of scoops.
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Unh!
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Hey, guys, I'm... I'm sorry
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to interrupt.
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I'm sitting at the table just
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around the way and somebody's
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blocking my car.
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I have a gray Honda civic.
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Murr doesn't base anything on
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the truth.
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He's never owned a car.
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The car that's blocking me is
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like... it's like a volkswa...
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Like an s.U.V.
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Does anybody have one?
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No.
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Are you guys driving an
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s.u.v.?
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It was parked, like, right
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there.
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Oh, the distracted.
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I don't even understand the
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approach here.
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Like, just sneak scoops?
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Sir, what kind of car do you
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have back there?
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What? A sonata.
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Did you park in the main lot
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over there?
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This guy is horrified.
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What? The side.
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You went over to the side
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lot?
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That's not gonna get him a
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lot of scoops.
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That's gonna get him a couple
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sneak scoops.
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This guy is...
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what kind of car did you
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drive over?
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Guys?
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They're ignoring him!
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They're actually ignoring him!
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What kind of car did you
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drive?
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Oh, I'm so sorry.
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I'm so sorry.
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There's no worries.
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I'm sorry.
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Here's the scoop, murr...
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You're done!
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You know, it's really nice of
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redd's, with their food for the
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homeless program they're doing
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with the big bowls of mashed
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potatoes.
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I'm dressed exactly like sal.
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I mean, you're wearing the
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same outfit, you both have a
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beard, you both have a good head
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of hair, but somehow you still
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look homeless.
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It's actually weird because
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you and Joe dress alike and you
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look like an
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hey, guys.
295
00:09:03,555 --> 00:09:04,853
I got the cure for what ails
296
00:09:04,854 --> 00:09:06,087
you.
297
00:09:06,088 --> 00:09:07,088
Potatoes.
298
00:09:15,488 --> 00:09:16,653
That's every potato in the bowl
299
00:09:16,654 --> 00:09:17,354
out right there.
300
00:09:17,355 --> 00:09:19,553
Q, it's how many scoops you
301
00:09:19,554 --> 00:09:21,187
put!
302
00:09:21,188 --> 00:09:22,453
It's not you lose all the
303
00:09:22,454 --> 00:09:23,221
potatoes!
304
00:09:23,222 --> 00:09:24,953
It's how many scoops!
305
00:09:24,954 --> 00:09:25,987
Oh
306
00:09:25,988 --> 00:09:27,387
That's one scoop!
307
00:09:27,388 --> 00:09:28,788
Nice plan
308
00:09:30,154 --> 00:09:31,287
so, uh, guys, what are we
309
00:09:31,288 --> 00:09:31,854
doing here?
310
00:09:31,855 --> 00:09:33,087
Scoopin' potatoes, buddy.
311
00:09:33,088 --> 00:09:33,788
No, no, no.
312
00:09:33,788 --> 00:09:34,754
There's your mistake.
313
00:09:34,755 --> 00:09:36,687
Let's scoopski potatoes.
314
00:09:36,688 --> 00:09:37,921
Is that Italian?
315
00:09:39,121 --> 00:09:40,153
"Scoopsy potatoes"?
316
00:09:40,154 --> 00:09:41,154
Scoopski.
317
00:09:41,155 --> 00:09:42,920
Why is he so confident?
318
00:09:42,921 --> 00:09:44,353
Whenever he makes up words, I
319
00:09:44,354 --> 00:09:45,420
get scared.
320
00:09:45,421 --> 00:09:47,587
♪ Scoopski potatoes
321
00:09:47,588 --> 00:09:48,521
unh!
322
00:09:48,522 --> 00:09:50,288
♪ Scoopski potatoes
323
00:09:51,254 --> 00:09:52,653
♪ scoopski potatoes
324
00:09:52,654 --> 00:09:53,853
ah, ah!
325
00:09:53,854 --> 00:09:55,187
♪ Scoopski potatoes
326
00:09:55,188 --> 00:09:56,420
bang!
327
00:09:56,421 --> 00:09:58,453
♪ Scoopski potato
328
00:09:58,454 --> 00:09:59,421
♪ scoopski p...
329
00:09:59,422 --> 00:10:00,653
Aah! Boom!
330
00:10:00,654 --> 00:10:02,353
♪ Scoopski potatoes
331
00:10:02,354 --> 00:10:03,653
♪ scoopski potatoes
332
00:10:03,654 --> 00:10:04,953
♪ scoopski potatoes
333
00:10:04,954 --> 00:10:06,020
♪ scoopski potatoes
334
00:10:06,021 --> 00:10:07,420
♪ scoopski potatoes
335
00:10:07,421 --> 00:10:08,421
bang!
336
00:10:09,354 --> 00:10:10,620
There's potato flying
337
00:10:10,621 --> 00:10:11,820
everywhere.
338
00:10:11,821 --> 00:10:13,087
♪ Scoopski potatoes
339
00:10:13,088 --> 00:10:14,088
unh!
340
00:10:15,421 --> 00:10:16,520
♪ You want the scoopski
341
00:10:16,521 --> 00:10:17,753
♪ you've got potatoes
342
00:10:17,754 --> 00:10:18,953
♪ you want the scoopski
343
00:10:18,954 --> 00:10:20,320
♪ you got potatoes
344
00:10:20,321 --> 00:10:21,887
the trick is to make them
345
00:10:21,888 --> 00:10:23,220
laugh so they don't care.
346
00:10:23,221 --> 00:10:24,221
Where's it going?!
347
00:10:24,221 --> 00:10:25,121
Scoopski pota...
348
00:10:25,122 --> 00:10:26,453
Aah! Ohh!
349
00:10:26,454 --> 00:10:28,088
Ehh! Ohh!
350
00:10:29,221 --> 00:10:32,753
♪ Scoopski potatoes
351
00:10:32,754 --> 00:10:33,721
♪ who wants scoopskies?
352
00:10:33,722 --> 00:10:34,987
♪ I got potatoes
353
00:10:34,988 --> 00:10:35,954
♪ who got the scoopskies?
354
00:10:35,955 --> 00:10:37,254
♪ I got potatoes
355
00:10:43,821 --> 00:10:45,953
Scoopski potatoes!
356
00:10:45,954 --> 00:10:50,887
Oh, my god!
357
00:10:50,888 --> 00:10:52,020
That's... that's the taste of
358
00:10:52,021 --> 00:10:53,021
victory right there.
359
00:10:54,388 --> 00:10:55,787
Narrator: Q's big scoop is
360
00:10:55,788 --> 00:10:57,253
small potatoes, so he's eating
361
00:10:57,254 --> 00:10:58,854
up the loser board.
362
00:11:03,688 --> 00:11:04,753
What do you guys see in the
363
00:11:04,754 --> 00:11:06,653
clouds?
364
00:11:06,654 --> 00:11:08,087
I see your mom.
365
00:11:08,088 --> 00:11:09,420
Oh!
366
00:11:09,421 --> 00:11:12,287
Got him again!
367
00:11:12,288 --> 00:11:15,353
It's not cool, guys.
368
00:11:15,354 --> 00:11:16,420
Today, we're cloud-watching
369
00:11:16,421 --> 00:11:17,188
in central park.
370
00:11:17,189 --> 00:11:18,287
We have to go up to strangers
371
00:11:18,288 --> 00:11:19,353
and tell them what we see in the
372
00:11:19,354 --> 00:11:19,754
clouds.
373
00:11:19,754 --> 00:11:20,754
The catch is, what we see
374
00:11:20,755 --> 00:11:21,820
will be given to us by the other
375
00:11:21,821 --> 00:11:22,821
guys.
376
00:11:22,854 --> 00:11:24,120
If you can't get the person
377
00:11:24,121 --> 00:11:25,420
to admit that they see what you
378
00:11:25,421 --> 00:11:27,421
see, you lose.
379
00:11:32,154 --> 00:11:33,154
You see that cloud right
380
00:11:33,154 --> 00:11:33,721
there?
381
00:11:33,722 --> 00:11:34,853
Doesn't that look like something
382
00:11:34,854 --> 00:11:36,087
to you?
383
00:11:36,088 --> 00:11:37,287
For me, this one right here,
384
00:11:37,288 --> 00:11:37,788
this cloud?
385
00:11:37,788 --> 00:11:38,788
Looks like a hooker with a
386
00:11:38,789 --> 00:11:40,254
heart of bronze.
387
00:11:40,288 --> 00:11:42,787
Looks like a, uh...
388
00:11:42,788 --> 00:11:44,520
Uh, it looks like a hooker with
389
00:11:44,521 --> 00:11:46,720
a heart of bronze.
390
00:11:46,721 --> 00:11:48,187
You know?
391
00:11:48,188 --> 00:11:49,387
Like, she's made some mistakes,
392
00:11:49,388 --> 00:11:49,854
you know?
393
00:11:49,855 --> 00:11:52,088
But she's on her way back.
394
00:11:52,754 --> 00:11:54,253
Like she might not take all the
395
00:11:54,254 --> 00:11:55,687
stuff from the nightstand, but
396
00:11:55,688 --> 00:11:59,120
she might take like $5 for gas.
397
00:11:59,121 --> 00:12:00,154
Yeah, yeah...
398
00:12:01,788 --> 00:12:03,087
Hey, uh...
399
00:12:03,088 --> 00:12:04,287
You didn't even ask her if
400
00:12:04,288 --> 00:12:05,353
she saw it, you dope?
401
00:12:05,354 --> 00:12:06,387
Didn't even play the game
402
00:12:06,388 --> 00:12:06,788
right.
403
00:12:06,789 --> 00:12:08,387
She just walked away thinking
404
00:12:08,388 --> 00:12:09,987
you're some weird guy that saw,
405
00:12:09,988 --> 00:12:11,487
in a cloud, a hooker with a
406
00:12:11,488 --> 00:12:12,321
heart of bronze.
407
00:12:12,322 --> 00:12:14,088
I forgot to ask her.
408
00:12:16,821 --> 00:12:20,187
Sit next to white pants.
409
00:12:20,188 --> 00:12:21,220
You see the cloud right
410
00:12:21,221 --> 00:12:21,788
there?
411
00:12:21,789 --> 00:12:23,087
Do you think that looks like
412
00:12:23,088 --> 00:12:24,620
anything at all?
413
00:12:24,621 --> 00:12:26,087
I do. I see a...
414
00:12:26,088 --> 00:12:27,721
A delicious hole.
415
00:12:28,988 --> 00:12:29,988
It means nothing, but it
416
00:12:29,988 --> 00:12:30,754
sounds like it does.
417
00:12:30,755 --> 00:12:32,153
Nothing and everything at the
418
00:12:32,154 --> 00:12:32,921
same time.
419
00:12:32,922 --> 00:12:33,987
It looks like a delicious
420
00:12:33,988 --> 00:12:34,854
hole.
421
00:12:34,855 --> 00:12:36,821
Do you see it?
422
00:12:39,521 --> 00:12:41,821
"Nope. Ready? We're out."
423
00:12:42,854 --> 00:12:44,620
On my list of activities that
424
00:12:44,621 --> 00:12:46,220
I would do on any given day,
425
00:12:46,221 --> 00:12:47,853
cloud-watching is the absolute
426
00:12:47,854 --> 00:12:50,353
last thing that I would ever do.
427
00:12:50,354 --> 00:12:50,954
I get it.
428
00:12:50,955 --> 00:12:52,420
It's like a... it's like an
429
00:12:52,421 --> 00:12:53,453
imagination thing.
430
00:12:53,454 --> 00:12:55,287
I can imagine everything q
431
00:12:55,288 --> 00:12:57,087
sees is, like, beer, shot of
432
00:12:57,088 --> 00:12:58,088
whiskey.
433
00:12:59,288 --> 00:13:00,453
Redhead.
434
00:13:00,454 --> 00:13:01,787
Can I ask your opinion on
435
00:13:01,788 --> 00:13:02,521
something?
436
00:13:02,522 --> 00:13:04,220
You see that cloud right there?
437
00:13:04,221 --> 00:13:05,253
Does that look like anything to
438
00:13:05,254 --> 00:13:06,287
you?
439
00:13:06,288 --> 00:13:07,587
'Cause to me, it looks like...
440
00:13:07,588 --> 00:13:09,354
Your real hair color.
441
00:13:09,988 --> 00:13:11,687
Oh, my god!
442
00:13:11,688 --> 00:13:12,554
You're a genius.
443
00:13:12,555 --> 00:13:14,453
Oh, my god!
444
00:13:14,454 --> 00:13:17,888
Oh, yeah?
445
00:13:18,321 --> 00:13:19,687
To me, it looks like a giant
446
00:13:19,688 --> 00:13:21,120
thumbs-down.
447
00:13:21,121 --> 00:13:23,087
Just like a giant thumbs-down in
448
00:13:23,088 --> 00:13:24,453
the sky.
449
00:13:24,454 --> 00:13:25,688
Yeah.
450
00:13:27,388 --> 00:13:28,820
Guys, what does that look
451
00:13:28,821 --> 00:13:29,454
like to you?
452
00:13:29,455 --> 00:13:30,787
That cloud up there?
453
00:13:30,788 --> 00:13:31,820
Yeah, you see that one floating
454
00:13:31,821 --> 00:13:32,288
by?
455
00:13:32,288 --> 00:13:32,954
See, to me...
456
00:13:32,955 --> 00:13:34,087
It looks like a bunch of
457
00:13:34,088 --> 00:13:35,354
shirtless 3rd-graders.
458
00:13:38,321 --> 00:13:39,321
To me...
459
00:13:40,888 --> 00:13:42,853
To me...
460
00:13:42,854 --> 00:13:44,087
It looks like a bunch of
461
00:13:44,088 --> 00:13:45,153
shirtless 3rd-graders.
462
00:13:45,154 --> 00:13:48,087
Oh, my god.
463
00:13:48,088 --> 00:13:49,153
Yeah, right up there.
464
00:13:49,154 --> 00:13:50,720
"There's tad right there."
465
00:13:50,721 --> 00:13:52,220
You got tad, Christopher,
466
00:13:52,221 --> 00:13:54,587
Dalton with no shirts.
467
00:13:54,588 --> 00:13:56,621
I mean, do you guys see it?
468
00:13:56,654 --> 00:13:57,954
You don't know the half of it.
469
00:13:59,354 --> 00:14:00,487
Right here.
470
00:14:00,488 --> 00:14:03,420
Plaid shirt, pink jacket.
471
00:14:03,421 --> 00:14:04,987
Wow.
472
00:14:04,988 --> 00:14:06,420
Guys, see those clouds passing
473
00:14:06,421 --> 00:14:07,421
by right here?
474
00:14:07,422 --> 00:14:08,953
To me, it looks just like...
475
00:14:08,954 --> 00:14:09,987
"My father telling me I'm a
476
00:14:09,988 --> 00:14:10,988
failure."
477
00:14:11,854 --> 00:14:13,553
It looks just like my father
478
00:14:13,554 --> 00:14:14,954
telling me I'm a failure.
479
00:14:16,854 --> 00:14:18,220
To me, every single cloud looks
480
00:14:18,221 --> 00:14:19,221
like that.
481
00:14:20,588 --> 00:14:22,620
Every tree...
482
00:14:22,621 --> 00:14:24,687
The laughter of children.
483
00:14:24,688 --> 00:14:26,120
Just reminds me of my father
484
00:14:26,121 --> 00:14:27,354
thinking I'm a failure.
485
00:14:28,654 --> 00:14:30,320
You see it on the cloud?
486
00:14:30,321 --> 00:14:31,653
Is it obvious when you look at
487
00:14:31,654 --> 00:14:33,153
me?
488
00:14:33,154 --> 00:14:34,553
Okay, nice to meet you.
489
00:14:34,554 --> 00:14:35,653
Right now, your father was
490
00:14:35,654 --> 00:14:36,221
right, buddy.
491
00:14:36,221 --> 00:14:37,221
That's failure.
492
00:14:39,121 --> 00:14:39,921
Oh.
493
00:14:39,921 --> 00:14:40,821
Want me to help you?
494
00:14:40,822 --> 00:14:42,087
Is it your first time to the
495
00:14:42,088 --> 00:14:42,854
fountain, or...?
496
00:14:42,855 --> 00:14:44,620
Yeah.
497
00:14:44,621 --> 00:14:45,653
I come down here for the
498
00:14:45,654 --> 00:14:46,254
cloud-watching.
499
00:14:46,255 --> 00:14:47,287
What's that cloud look like to
500
00:14:47,288 --> 00:14:47,621
you?
501
00:14:47,622 --> 00:14:48,887
You see that little one right in
502
00:14:48,888 --> 00:14:50,187
the middle?
503
00:14:50,188 --> 00:14:51,088
A fish laughing?
504
00:14:51,089 --> 00:14:52,353
You know what it looks like
505
00:14:52,354 --> 00:14:53,088
to me?
506
00:14:53,089 --> 00:14:54,187
Two mattresses having a
507
00:14:54,188 --> 00:14:54,888
pillow fight.
508
00:14:54,889 --> 00:14:56,553
It looks like two mattresses
509
00:14:56,554 --> 00:14:57,854
having a pillow fight.
510
00:14:59,788 --> 00:15:01,087
That's a good one.
511
00:15:01,088 --> 00:15:02,620
That is a good one, right?
512
00:15:02,621 --> 00:15:03,653
Do you see it?
513
00:15:03,654 --> 00:15:04,388
Maybe.
514
00:15:04,388 --> 00:15:05,121
Maybe?
515
00:15:05,122 --> 00:15:06,353
Oh, it's a maybe.
516
00:15:06,354 --> 00:15:07,121
No, no, no.
517
00:15:07,121 --> 00:15:08,088
That's not a yes.
518
00:15:08,088 --> 00:15:08,988
"It's a maybe."
519
00:15:08,989 --> 00:15:10,453
Gonna need a yes or no-ski.
520
00:15:10,454 --> 00:15:12,220
If you look at the whole thing,
521
00:15:12,221 --> 00:15:13,653
it actually looks like...
522
00:15:13,654 --> 00:15:15,820
An NBA locker room.
523
00:15:15,821 --> 00:15:16,821
Yeah.
524
00:15:18,488 --> 00:15:22,553
Uh, an NBA locker room.
525
00:15:22,554 --> 00:15:25,087
That's not a dragon, no, no.
526
00:15:25,088 --> 00:15:26,253
That tail sticking down is
527
00:15:26,254 --> 00:15:28,720
Shaq's dong.
528
00:15:28,721 --> 00:15:29,788
"The little one"!
529
00:15:30,754 --> 00:15:31,987
Yeah, it must have got cold
530
00:15:31,988 --> 00:15:32,488
in there.
531
00:15:32,488 --> 00:15:33,188
"Oh, my god!
532
00:15:33,189 --> 00:15:34,220
There's dreadlock Jesus!"
533
00:15:34,221 --> 00:15:35,088
Oh
534
00:15:35,089 --> 00:15:36,953
Dreadlock Jesus.
535
00:15:36,954 --> 00:15:38,120
See this? Right here.
536
00:15:38,121 --> 00:15:39,753
It's Jesus but with dreadlocks.
537
00:15:39,754 --> 00:15:40,354
Uh-huh.
538
00:15:40,355 --> 00:15:41,720
So, like, when he's, like,
539
00:15:41,721 --> 00:15:43,087
multiplying the loaves, he's
540
00:15:43,088 --> 00:15:44,920
just doing this first.
541
00:15:44,921 --> 00:15:45,688
Right?
542
00:15:45,689 --> 00:15:47,588
Do you see it?
543
00:15:47,621 --> 00:15:49,154
Oh-ho-ho!
544
00:15:51,088 --> 00:15:52,153
Narrator: It's cloudy skies
545
00:15:52,154 --> 00:15:52,721
for q.
546
00:15:52,722 --> 00:15:54,687
He's tonight's big loser.
547
00:15:54,688 --> 00:15:56,320
Q lost, and he's great at
548
00:15:56,321 --> 00:15:56,954
losing.
549
00:15:56,955 --> 00:15:58,087
But he is terrible at
550
00:15:58,088 --> 00:15:58,554
science.
551
00:15:58,554 --> 00:15:59,354
Wait. What?
552
00:15:59,355 --> 00:16:00,787
So, inside waiting for him is
553
00:16:00,788 --> 00:16:01,788
a room full of science
554
00:16:01,788 --> 00:16:02,388
enthusiasts.
555
00:16:02,389 --> 00:16:03,487
And we've prepared a
556
00:16:03,488 --> 00:16:04,820
presentation for him, titled
557
00:16:04,821 --> 00:16:06,087
"the future of science &
558
00:16:06,088 --> 00:16:07,220
technology."
559
00:16:07,221 --> 00:16:08,387
Wait. I thought you guys were
560
00:16:08,388 --> 00:16:09,487
dressing me up like a butcher.
561
00:16:09,488 --> 00:16:10,488
Oh, you're gonna butcher
562
00:16:10,488 --> 00:16:10,954
this.
563
00:16:10,955 --> 00:16:12,354
That's a scientific fact, Jack.
564
00:16:14,754 --> 00:16:17,587
Hello.
565
00:16:17,588 --> 00:16:19,220
Welcome, and thank you for
566
00:16:19,221 --> 00:16:19,821
coming.
567
00:16:19,822 --> 00:16:20,853
Quinndustries, "the future of
568
00:16:20,854 --> 00:16:22,087
science & technology."
569
00:16:22,088 --> 00:16:23,887
I'm Brian Quinn... phd, of
570
00:16:23,888 --> 00:16:26,087
course, in technology at
571
00:16:26,088 --> 00:16:27,453
Cornell university.
572
00:16:27,454 --> 00:16:28,553
Okay, here we go.
573
00:16:28,554 --> 00:16:29,787
"Examples of recent
574
00:16:29,788 --> 00:16:30,788
breakthroughs."
575
00:16:30,789 --> 00:16:32,220
Acceleration of quantum
576
00:16:32,221 --> 00:16:33,953
computing.
577
00:16:33,954 --> 00:16:34,954
Got to love that quantum
578
00:16:34,954 --> 00:16:35,954
computing.
579
00:16:36,288 --> 00:16:38,153
Non-invasive genome sequencing.
580
00:16:38,154 --> 00:16:39,887
He's trying really hard to
581
00:16:39,888 --> 00:16:41,520
pronounce the words right.
582
00:16:41,521 --> 00:16:42,953
The beginning of the
583
00:16:42,954 --> 00:16:44,520
presentation, he cannot keep up.
584
00:16:44,521 --> 00:16:45,521
"Impending medical
585
00:16:45,521 --> 00:16:46,088
breakthroughs."
586
00:16:46,089 --> 00:16:47,953
This is what I feel is going to
587
00:16:47,954 --> 00:16:49,520
really interest everybody.
588
00:16:49,521 --> 00:16:50,820
Common cold vaccine.
589
00:16:50,821 --> 00:16:52,587
It's coming, and it all comes
590
00:16:52,588 --> 00:16:55,454
down to genome sequencing.
591
00:16:58,488 --> 00:17:00,088
There is no vaccine for that.
592
00:17:03,354 --> 00:17:04,653
I mean, I guess beer?
593
00:17:04,654 --> 00:17:06,487
'Cause if you really want to get
594
00:17:06,488 --> 00:17:08,087
your genome sequence on...
595
00:17:08,088 --> 00:17:08,954
And...
596
00:17:08,955 --> 00:17:10,820
"The state of research."
597
00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:13,553
Now this is interesting.
598
00:17:13,554 --> 00:17:15,353
"Research and experimental
599
00:17:15,354 --> 00:17:17,520
development is formal work which
600
00:17:17,521 --> 00:17:19,553
is undertaken systematically to
601
00:17:19,554 --> 00:17:21,720
increase the stock of knowledge,
602
00:17:21,721 --> 00:17:25,087
including knowledge of humanity,
603
00:17:25,088 --> 00:17:27,253
culture and society, and the use
604
00:17:27,254 --> 00:17:29,720
of this stock of knowledge..."
605
00:17:29,721 --> 00:17:31,387
Write this down.
606
00:17:31,388 --> 00:17:33,187
"to devise new applications
607
00:17:33,188 --> 00:17:34,920
in the corresponding field of
608
00:17:34,921 --> 00:17:36,420
study for the collective
609
00:17:36,421 --> 00:17:37,587
advancement of the
610
00:17:37,588 --> 00:17:39,253
aforementioned knowledge of
611
00:17:39,254 --> 00:17:42,488
humanity, culture, and society.
612
00:17:44,788 --> 00:17:47,520
Uh, Dr. Craig yun, phd.
613
00:17:47,521 --> 00:17:49,220
Great guy, works down the hall
614
00:17:49,221 --> 00:17:50,920
from me, also went to Cornell.
615
00:17:50,921 --> 00:17:52,920
He's a nobel laureate, and that
616
00:17:52,921 --> 00:17:54,753
guy is just cracking away at
617
00:17:54,754 --> 00:17:57,954
genome sequencing.
618
00:18:02,254 --> 00:18:05,220
Also kind of a dick.
619
00:18:05,221 --> 00:18:06,420
He's a smart dick.
620
00:18:06,421 --> 00:18:07,820
"The future of cloning."
621
00:18:07,821 --> 00:18:08,654
Here we go.
622
00:18:08,654 --> 00:18:09,521
Yes!
623
00:18:09,522 --> 00:18:12,087
Human cloning is possible now.
624
00:18:12,088 --> 00:18:13,887
Quinndustries has successfully
625
00:18:13,888 --> 00:18:15,953
cloned the first human.
626
00:18:15,954 --> 00:18:17,553
There you go, q... the first
627
00:18:17,554 --> 00:18:18,554
human clone.
628
00:18:18,555 --> 00:18:19,953
There's the q-two!
629
00:18:19,954 --> 00:18:21,087
Rosie O'Donnell.
630
00:18:21,088 --> 00:18:22,088
I mean, look...
631
00:18:24,254 --> 00:18:25,820
Introducing the q-two.
632
00:18:25,821 --> 00:18:26,953
Right there.
633
00:18:26,954 --> 00:18:28,387
Look at that vault.
634
00:18:28,388 --> 00:18:29,853
Okay.
635
00:18:29,854 --> 00:18:33,088
Oh.
636
00:18:41,088 --> 00:18:45,620
Technology.
637
00:18:45,621 --> 00:18:47,953
It's Rosie O'Donnell!
638
00:18:47,954 --> 00:18:49,288
Your twin!
639
00:19:01,621 --> 00:19:03,953
Right.
640
00:19:03,954 --> 00:19:05,320
Oh, okay, I see.
641
00:19:05,321 --> 00:19:06,654
Both: Oh, wow.
642
00:19:26,321 --> 00:19:27,687
The q-two, ladies and
643
00:19:27,688 --> 00:19:28,688
gentlemen.
644
00:19:31,588 --> 00:19:32,921
There we go... the, uh...
645
00:19:34,488 --> 00:19:36,788
Cloning, ladies and gentlemen!
646
00:19:38,754 --> 00:19:42,221
Q-two...
35650
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