Original subtitles

Good times, any time you need a payment. Good times, any time you need a friend.

Good times, any time you're up and under.

Not getting hassled, not getting hustled. Keeping your head above water.

Making a way when you can.

Temporary layoffs.

Good times.

No, no, no. You got to watch one more time here. You are going to get this

for the community -centered dance. You hear me? Now watch me. I'm going to turn

on the radio, and we're going to dance. Okay. All right.

I

don't

think I want to do that.

Without music, you can get arrested. Do you understand?

Oh, no, you can't.

dance Saturday?

Boom Boom said she's tired of J .J. dressing fancier than she does.

So J .J. said, well, what can I say?

When it comes to fashion, I'm a model from heaven. And the clothes you wear,

you're 747.

Yeah, but I'm surprised that J .J. broke up with Boom Boom Belinda before the

dance.

Hey. Hey, maybe this is a chance for teeth cleaning. Wait a minute. What's my

helper got to do with J .J.?

A TC's hot to trap for JJ.

Hot to trap?

I think it's time for you to do your homework. Come on.

Every time the good stuff comes around, I got to go study.

Don't even worry about it. We can play gin over at your house later.

Come over to my place, big boy.

We'll finish the gin, and after that, we can play cards.

sink for y 'all. Oh, can you imagine that? A tub fixing a sink?

We told you about that leak three months ago, you know? Yeah, but I didn't have

the things I needed to fix it.

Here's your helper now, Hamburger.

Hi, TC.

Is, uh, JJ here?

No. Oh.

Well, are y 'all going to the dance Saturday night? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah,

gonna go.

Is JJ going?

girl he was going to take to the dance.

Really? Yeah.

Oh, that's too bad.

Okay, TC, that's enough of that chit -chatting. You want to chase after JJ,

it on your own time. And another thing, young lady, you don't see me let my love

life interfere with my work.

How could nothing interfere with nothing?

TC, get that thing fixed.

Oh, by the way, Miss Woods, don't you have a shower for me to fix?

No, no, no, no, no, no. That was five months ago.

Who needs hot water anyway?

I know what you mean. I've been taking cold showers ever since the day I got

married.

What do you think?

I thought J .J. was going to take you to the dance.

Haven't y 'all been going out for a month now?

Yeah, Michael, but it's only on weeknights.

We watch the hockey games, the basketball games, the wrestling match.

I would like to be something more than just one of the guys.

Oh, TC, it's not you.

You know, when it comes to women, there's something you must know about

Oh, no.

JJ's gay?

No, no, no, that's not what I mean at all.

Well, see, his taste in women... Well, how can I say this? You know, well, it

runs to... Trash.

Well, let's say flash. I mean... What she's trying to say is...

His girls have nicknames. He gives them all nicknames. Like Boom Boom Belinda.

Or Myrna the Burner.

And Mickey the Quickie.

Hey, everybody.

Hey, Keith.

How you doing?

How you doing? See, babe, I told you I had to remember to pick up my suit.

baby. You were supposed to pick up my dress at the cleanest. Where is it? Jay

just got your dress.

Don't worry. He'll be up in a minute. He was just huffing the girl down at the

cleanest for a date to the dance.

J .J. is going to take a perfect stranger to the dance. She turned him

J .J. wouldn't take no for an answer. When I left, she was pressing his

With him in them.

J .J., will you look at my dress? What are you doing?

It's got 50 creases in it.

Malona, I'm lucky that I'm not creased.

with a dress is not exactly easy.

I had a whine or wink at me. I had a construction worker whistle at me. And

guy asked me to go do a dance.

Why wouldn't you go?

Hey, TC, my main man, what's happening, bro?

JJ, I heard you broke up with Boom Boom and Liz last night.

Uh, uh, it's not gonna be easy to get another date for the dance.

No big deal, Thumb.

All I got to do is pick up the phone, make one quick call, and my reputation,

girls will break down the door just to get a look at me.

J .J., and when they do get a look at you, they'll break down the walls to get

away from you.

Yeah, I'm going to make one girl real happy tonight.

Yeah?

Yeah. What I'm going to do is go get my little black book and let my fingers do

the walking through the yellow pages of L .U .V.

Love.

Tracy, you better do something.

What? Take the initiative.

Ask him out for a date.

Well, I don't know.

Hey, look, this is the age of the liberated woman. I mean, I always enjoy

when a girl comes on to me.

Before

you

were married, right?

Yeah, yeah, long time ago.

what J .J. calls some bimbo, you'll be out on the limbo.

Who is going to be the lucky girl?

So, J .J., this is your little black book, huh?

Uh, that's only from A to G, Keith. I couldn't carry the rest of it out here.

Let me look at this mess you got here.

I got it all indexed and everything, see?

I got it according to height, weight, hair color, hairstyle, hair length. You

even got a little extra star down there for experience.

You go out with a girl who's 38.

Uh, that's not her age, Keith.

That's her IQ.

Yeah, Keith.

I even got dates according to present dates, current dates.

Future dates?

Mm -hmm. Future dates.

Lola Falana, Donna Summer, Princess Grace.

I like a little challenge.

J .J., do you think that, um, uh, I wonder if... Shut up!

Fifi? Yeah, this is J .J. here.

Yeah, kiss, kiss to you too, lover.

Look here, I know this is a little far in advance to be calling you.

But there's a dance tomorrow night. You think you can make it?

Oh, you got a babysitter.

Oh, yeah, you got a babysitter for little Timmy Johnson?

Oh, okay.

Little Timmy Johnson?

Wait a minute, that dude's 22 years old!

JJ, if you need a date for the dance, what to call those girls?

There's a sexy lady right here in this living room who would love to go to the

dance with you.

Well, don't you think you're a little too old for me?

Slap across your nose.

Uh, J .J., I have something very important to ask you.

Oh, yeah. I got something important to ask you, too, T .C., but you go first.

Oh, no.

It can wait. You go first.

Well, you know, there's a big dance Saturday night.

Uh -huh.

And, you know, we've been going out a little bit lately, you know, going to

football game, basketball game over at Hanson's, right? Yeah, I have so much

fun. I always have a good time when I'm with you, JJ.

Yeah, yeah. We laugh.

Ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha.

Ha, ha, ha. And we laugh.

Ha, ha, ha.

Ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha,

ha. Remember that wedges who spilled a drink on you?

Oh!

I was down there about a week ago. And he spilled a drink on me.

I just don't understand, JJ.

I mean, even when the cocktail waitress turns him down, he goes to a singles bar

to try to hustle a date.

What's wrong with me anyway?

Hey, TC, you finishing here yet?

Please, buffalo butt.

finished, yeah.

Well, I mean, can't you see she's upset?

She wanted JJ to ask her to the dance, and he didn't. Oh, that's too bad, T .C.

I know how you feel.

There's nothing in the world worth than being dumped.

You feel... You sort of feel lower than dirt. You just want to crawl in a hole

and die.

Burger, don't ever apply for a job at Hallmark.

You know, TC, one way to get rid of a broken heart is to just throw yourself

into your work.

Bookman, I'm a plumber. I fix toilets.

I know that.

But you'll get over it, kid, because you're a tough guy.

See what I mean? I am tired of being one of the guys.

I am a woman.

Right on, TC.

And, TC, don't be ashamed to show it.

Treat it like every other man.

Hook his goose, you got to catch his eye.

That ain't no shaming. Shake him before baking.

What do you mean?

Honey, you got to be feminine.

There's a definite feminine walk, okay? Now watch.

Now, that would turn the heads of most men.

Yeah.

One foot in front of the other.

The girls that turn JJ on walk like that?

No, they walk like this.

And her gestures.

Watch.

I didn't know there was anything between us, Miss Wood.

There always is. Your stomach.

got to take care of some business.

I was just noticing that you happen to be Aquarius.

Oh, you're an Aquarius, too?

Are you kidding?

Well,

you know, my moon is in the seventh house.

I know what you're talking about. We've been evicted a couple of times

ourselves.

Are you into ESP?

Well, of course.

Well, then, would you happen to see us spending the night together?

Well, I have a vision.

It's a moon.

for another one of your lies.

And I... And I just met you upside your head.

Uh,

goodbye there, Mama. I'll call you later.

Yeah, my polo injury, my knee.

Hey, string bean, you struck out, huh?

Me? Strike out? What gives you that impression?

Well, if that... phony smile of yours was any wider, your ears would be inside

your mouth.

Look, brother, you cannot be phony.

Girls are too hip for that. You got to be honest.

Honesty is the key.

I mean, you got to be like yourself.

Yeah, honesty, huh?

I guess you're right. Honesty is the best policy.

J .J. Evans, Robert Redford here.

tell you something you want some women i mean just stick with me i have not

slept alone in years yeah neither have i thanks to michael

well in fact the last time i slept alone i was in this incubator

and the nurses were standing all on the outside making eyes at me you

see i got this big big problem with women

just cannot seem to get rid of them.

Oh, yeah?

If you're doing so good with women, what are you doing in a spot like this?

Alone.

Oh, you see, I just haven't seen what I wanted yet, you know?

Oh, until now.

Hey,

that is one...

hunk of woman there.

You know, I feel like I already know her.

Yeah, me too.

No, no, no, no, brother.

That fox is going to be displayed in my trophy case tonight.

Sugar, sugar, where have you been hiding yourself?

I didn't know I was hiding.

Well, Not that much.

T .C., I hardly recognize you.

Well, if it isn't little J .J. Evans.

Only by reputation.

He's supposed to be a real lady killer.

Him?

even dirty toothpick.

Wait a minute here. Hold on.

T .C., how about me and you going down and skipping this place and have a

hamburger?

Can you take this?

The great lover here wants to have a hamburger.

And I suppose Billy Dee is going to want a chocolate shake, too.

Yeah, we're too strong.

He probably has to be home at 10 o 'clock.

have a better idea.

I happen to know that there won't be anyone home at your place tonight, so

don't we just go back there and have dessert, if you know what I mean.

the average night for the kid.

Close your mouth there, bro. You're gonna let the flies in.

Well, we're finally alone.

JJ, why don't you fix me a little something?

Why, is a little something broken?

A drink.

Oh, a drink, yeah, a drink.

Some Kool -Aid, some root beer, some ginger ale, some ferret bronco.

Forget it, D .J .J.

I did not waste any more time.

Uh,

D .C., uh, you sure you want...

and get the final sports score?

The only scoring I'm interested in is right here.

TC, you know, you really surprised me. I always thought of you as just one of

the guys.

Oh? Do I still seem like one of the guys?

Not any of the guys that I know.

It's really surprising.

I mean, you think you know a guy. I mean, a woman.

A Ms.

You go to the football game with them. You go to the basketball game with them.

And then all of a sudden, well.

suspecting a change -up, and I got a bite of blue fastball.

But, uh, I can't wait to see your curve.

It's so funny.

And so cute.

Well, uh, let me go, uh, take off my jacket here and get ready for the real

action. Uh, yeah.

JJ, I got to level with you.

This isn't me.

The hair isn't me. The dress isn't me. This whole night isn't me.

Well, then who are you?

Don't you see, JJ? It's an act.

I did this because I really like you and I wanted to attract your attention.

You're too nice a guy, JJ, and I feel guilty about fooling you.

Would you mind fooling me just a little while longer?

Is that what you really want, J .J.? No, hold on, T .C.

I'm not sure what I really want, at least from you.

But I think we should take the time to find out.

How much time, J .J.? Well, as much time as we need.

And we can start tomorrow by going to the dance if you want to.

I'd love to.

That is, if you're sure, it won't spoil your reputation.

It's really not that much reputation to spoil.

You mean what they say about you on the ladies' room wall isn't true?

Not only is it not true, I'm sorry I ever wrote it.

before a studio audience.

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