Original subtitles

Good time, anytime you need a payment. Good time, anytime you need a friend.

Good time, anytime you're up and under.

Not getting hassled, not getting hustled. Keeping your head up for water.

Making a way when you can.

Temporary layoffs. Good time.

It's probably President Ford calling to tell us why the country's in such bad

shape.

I just don't mean to call and collect. Oh, Jay.

Hello?

Oh, Henrietta.

No, JJ's not here.

Listen, Henrietta, we've all been just dying to meet you, so why don't you come

over and have dinner with us tonight?

And think of what a big surprise that'll be for JJ.

Good. Then we'll see you in a little while.

Bye -bye, sweetheart.

James, we're finally going to meet JJ's girl, Henrietta.

I'm so excited.

I can hardly wait to see what kind of girl she is.

Baby, I can't think of but two kinds.

There's the dumb kind you bring home to meet your folks and the hip kind you

bring home when your folks ain't there.

Oh, which kind was it?

and lucky enough to catch.

Oh, James, that is the sweetest, most touching way I ever heard you squirm at

anything yet.

No, I mean every word.

Oh.

You know something, James?

You should have been a typist. You sure are partial to the touch system.

Hey, Michael, Thelma, y 'all come out here a minute. I got some good news for

you. What is it, Ma? Yeah, what's up?

Henrietta. is coming to dinner.

And I don't want you to mention one word about this when J .J. gets home. It's

going to be a surprise.

Tell him I want you to help me finish dinner, okay? Okay, Mom.

And, Michael? Yeah, Mom? I want you to scrub up good, comb your hair, and put

another shirt. Some dopey girl?

Mama, the guest is the one who's supposed to do all that stuff, not me. I

here.

You need some help making a wardrobe selection?

Let me see. Should I wear my shirt with the stripes or the one with the wide

collar? Oh, no.

Don't go.

Honey, you know it wouldn't hurt if you put on another shirt, too.

For some old dopey girl?

Let me see. Should I wear my brown shirt or my brown shirt? Oh, no.

Mmm.

Mars cooking.

Yeah. On the appreciation scale of 1 to 10, your cooking gets a big 9 .9.

Only 9 .9?

Yeah, Thoma's cooking gets a .1.

After you take the first swallow, you .1 to the Pepthor Bismarck.

For all you know, totem pole, I might have cooked with you just in half.

Impossible. My nose is programmed to cut off automatically.

And my stomach goes into instant reject.

JJ, what are all those newspapers for?

Maybe he wants you to housebreak him.

Mom, what I have here is a few of the morning, the afternoon, and a few of the

neighborhood throwaways.

picked up before they were thrown away.

I want to closely scrutinize the possibility of getting a full -time job.

What happened to your part -time ushering job?

Part -time ain't good enough, Ma. I need a full -time job.

You're looking at a brand new me.

J .J. the conscientious.

J .J. the mature.

how mature I am, Ma, I will ignore the child.

Moving on.

As you know, Ma, in a couple of months I'll be graduating from high school.

Therefore, I'm going to start thinking about my future now.

You know, it's a cold, ugly world I got out there to face.

With your face out there, it'll be colder.

that you're starting to take life serious.

Well, I am, Ma.

Now, let's see what fantastic jobs are available for James Evans, Jr.

Electronic engineer.

Digital analog circuit design.

Must have telecommunications expanse and modern design and active filter

retracement.

So much that the manufacturing experts prefer salary commensurate with expanse.

Moving on.

This one ain't no easier. Moving on to the next page.

Hey, Ma, here's one in my bag.

Salesman wanted.

Young, eager, and brave.

I'm young, I'm eager, and I'm... Then you better quit while you're ahead.

Ma, can we trade her in for a future draft choice?

Ma, stop bothering your brother.

Huh.

Now. Let's see what they want the young, eager, bright salesman to sell.

Cemetery plots.

Must have car.

Car, are they kidding?

They must mean hearse.

Maybe you better move on to the next paper.

Here's something that looks good.

Restaurant manager.

Large... restaurant has opening for management position.

Excellent salary and benefits.

Send resume.

Resume, stupid.

Oh, resume.

Then the job must be in a French restaurant.

of all the jobs and work experiences you've had in the past few years.

Well, suppose you ain't had no job or work experience. Then what are you

Your regrets.

I'm sorry, Mama, but I don't know why I have to go through all this trouble just

to eat dinner at home. But, Michael, you look so cute.

Mama, why do I have to look cute to eat? Why can't I look like JJ?

stand getting dressed for Julian Bonham Muhammad Ali with some dopey old...

Michael, why don't you go into Thelma's room and read the funnies?

Man, you can't say two words around here without being sent out to another room.

J .J., what I can't understand is why all the sudden concern about your future

and making big money?

I got my reasons, Ma.

I got my reasons.

J .J., you'll never find anything in the papers you qualify for.

Then I'll go to the employment agency, and I'll say to that personnel director,

it's about time you all saw the light and hired a great kid, Dynamite!

Junior,

what you doing with all these newspapers?

I'm looking for a full -time job, Dad.

Say what?

That's right, Dad.

I think it's about time that I'd gone to the world and become the master of my

own destiny.

Yeah, well, master without a good education, only destiny you're going to

is a swift kick in the butt.

Well, I'm going to have a high school diploma.

Oh, Junior, nowadays that ain't enough to get you as high as the bottom of the

heap. I'm telling you, it's rough out there, son.

What you need to be concentrating on is a junior college and one of them big

-time art schools.

Well, did I tell you right now, my mind is definitely not on junior college or

art school.

But, JJ, what could be more important than your art?

Henrietta, and the possibility of getting married.

Married? You?

And why not?

Henrietta digs sweets, and I am the almond joy of...

You think you're in love, huh? Well, I've been hit by something.

The mere thought of Henry and it turns on my ignition and provides the sparks

that start my motor racing.

You don't need no wife. You need a mechanic.

There's no need to discuss marriage for you. You're too broke, too

irresponsible, and too young.

Something smells strange all of a sudden.

First it's this full -time job, and now this marriage nonsense.

We're going to find out what it's all about as soon as Henrietta gets here.

When Henrietta gets where?

Here.

We invited her over for dinner. It was going to be a surprise.

Well, since I hate surprises, and Henrietta hates dinner, I called and

to stay home. You'll do nothing of the kind to put that phone down.

Oh, Ma, Henrietta can't come here. This building's dangerous.

Something weird all...

Nobody bothers me.

That's because weirdos got respect for each other.

Well, that must be Henrietta now.

Don't open it, Ma.

Pretend we're not home. Or better yet, I'll write a note saying we moved and

shove it under the door.

I'll shove you under that door. Answer it.

Answer the door, Junior.

she was going to bring company.

Henrietta, I want you to meet the beautiful lady who made this historic

possible. My mother, Mrs. James Evans.

Mrs. Evans, this is one of my biggest thrills.

That's quite a compliment.

that I'm the chip off of.

Father, James Evans Sr.

I'm the block, but the chip is cracked.

Nice to meet you, Mr. Evans.

Same here, Henrietta.

And I want you to meet my brilliant little kid brother, Michael, and my

the weird old Thelma.

You know, you all look exactly like I had you pictured. Well, you know...

is that you are much prettier than we thought you'd be.

A lot much.

You know, I'm going to let you and Mrs. Evans in on a little secret.

Secret?

Yeah. I mean, you're really lucky to have a son like J .J.

He's the most adorable dude I know.

Henry, his only fault is telling it like it is.

We're going to be a little while before dinner, so why don't you take Henrietta

into your room and let her hear some of your new albums?

But I don't have any new albums. Then take her in there and hum some of the

you don't have.

Oh, yeah, okay.

Come on, Henrietta. I got a couple of really bad records I bet you haven't

yet. Well, don't be too sure, Thelma. After all, I do get around.

Something tells me things are going to be said that a little kid shouldn't

But I'm staying anyway.

You go into that room and read the funny papers. Daddy, I already read the funny

papers. And they don't have as much action as there is out here. Go!

Daddy, I always got to split when things get exciting.

You think it's exciting now? Keep standing there, here.

Boy, I tell you, there's nothing I like better than a dull evening at home.

Okay, JJ, you've got a lot of... I love explaining to do, so get with it, and I

want the whole story. We ain't got to hear the whole story, baby. We can guess

the beginning because we done seen the middle.

Does that mean you don't want us to do anything about this? I don't know what

can do about it other than make sure Junior understands everything there is

know about this kind of situation.

Well, what is there to understand?

He understands that one plus one makes three.

says you do. Oh, no, Florida. Now, when a girl gets pregnant nowadays, it's her

fault. I mean, it's all sorts of ways.

It's all sorts of ways to fix this kind of thing. And she could have done it by

herself just by saying no.

Now,

there are a whole lot of things that a girl can do by herself, but getting

pregnant ain't one of them.

know he was a willing accomplice. I bet you it's just a con job to trap Junior

in the mariner. Well, Dad.

Oh, Junior, shut up. This ain't none of your business.

This is crazy.

You just said yourself that J .J. wasn't prepared for what's out there.

Who would want to trap him into bringing home the bacon when he can't even catch

the pig?

A lot of girls get pregnant all the time just to land a good catch.

James, J .J. is my son, too, and I love him dearly.

This unemployed teenager is a good catch.

Oh, well, he is.

Now, he may not seem like much right now, baby, but one day he's going to be

great artist. I think the girl's just using her head trying to get in on the

ground floor.

Oh. All right, Junior, I told you to shut up. You ain't got nothing to do

this.

Girl, you sure got a lot of good records to dance to.

Ain't nothing I like better to do than to dance.

Oh, really?

Like a butterfly.

Well, at least I used to.

Now I look a little more like the Goodyear blimp.

Hey, Thelma, what's wrong?

I mean, you ain't said much of nothing ever since we got in here.

I'm sorry, Henrietta.

I guess it's hard for me to say much that matters because, well, I really

know you.

Oh, what's to know?

I'm Taurus. I'll be 17.

I'm an only child.

I'm in the 11th grade.

I'm pregnant.

As a result, I look terrible in a bikini.

Henrietta, what was it like when you found out?

I mean, were you upset?

Did you cry or what?

Well, that's kind of hard to explain. See, at first I was scared.

And then I started feeling more like a woman and less like a little girl.

And then I started thinking about what it took to be a woman and a mother. And

wow, it got scary all over again.

I would have been scared from the jump.

If I told my parents I was pregnant, they'd explode.

Girl, my parents were the last thing for me to worry about.

It's like when I told my mother. She just stared.

And then she said, I wonder if my becoming a grandmother means I have to

mixing Geritol with my gin.

What did your father say?

Oh, nothing much.

Just that I'm getting everything I deserve for not being more careful.

Oh, well, with all the birth control information that's floating around.

Why weren't you?

I had a very good reason.

I never thought I'd get pregnant.

You know, I dated a lot of guys who tried to push me farther than I wanted

go. But then I'd start thinking of things that could happen I didn't want

happen. And, hey, Henrietta, I'm not trying to put you down or anything, but

just wasn't worth it.

Well, I felt the same way.

But, girl, one day I thought I was in love, and boom, it was worth it.

of love than physical love.

Now you tell me.

What are you going to do about finishing school?

Well, what can I do? I mean, the three R's just don't make it when they're

reading, writing, and raising a kid.

How does my brother feel about all this?

Oh, Thelma, JJ's been really terrific, you know?

Like, if it wasn't for him, I don't know what kind of shape I'd be in.

James, taking sides in this is all...

about two kids who may be on the verge of ruining their lives, and we've got to

do something about it. Well, what can we do about it? This boy can't even raise

himself.

His idea of raising a baby would probably be to feed it strained snicker

Finding a solution isn't going to be easy, but we've got to find one.

Why do we have to find a solution? How come our folks can't find a solution?

She's the one with the problem.

Okay, then we'll let them find the solution. And if they demand a wedding,

Split the tab.

We'll let them bring the shotgun and we'll bring the shells.

Can I say one thing? What? The baby ain't mine.

What?

Henry did a crazy thing before we met in a moment of passion. I didn't even know

it happened until I noticed that a $100 figure was becoming a victim of

inflation.

Can you tell me one thing, please?

If it ain't your baby, then why do you want to marry her?

I didn't say I wanted to marry her. I said I was thinking about marrying her

because I think I'm in love with her. Yeah?

Well, Junior, we can't stop you from thinking you're in love with Henrietta.

if you're thinking about marriage, think again, hear?

That's right.

Now, the legal age to get married in Chicago is 21.

You're only 18, which means you must have our permission.

And we ain't about to give it.

Mr. McLevins, please.

You don't have to get on J .J.'s case because of me.

J .J., look.

I really appreciate you wanting to marry me, but the fact is, I'm not marrying

you or anybody else.

Well, at least you could do is wait for me to ask you before you turn me down.

I like you more than I do anybody else.

But right now, marriage ain't what I want.

Well, what about the baby? It needs a father.

Not you.

Henrietta, tell me something. How do you folks feel about your condition?

Mr. Evans, for years, my folks ain't felt nothing but hangovers.

Well, you sure ain't gonna help them rush to get on the wagon by making them

grandparents without bringing home a husband.

Henrietta, what will you do?

Where will you live?

I haven't thought about that yet.

Well, look, Henrietta, you can't go back to your folks. I mean, you was having a

rough enough time by yourself.

Now there's gonna be two of you.

I know.

Henrietta, if you're not for marriage, it seems to me that the best thing is

the baby up for adoption.

That makes sense.

I can't see no other way.

Well?

I'm keeping my baby.

But, Henrietta, you're hardly more than a child yourself.

You've got no job. You've got no education.

What can you possibly give to that child?

Love, Mrs. Evans.

I need something to love.

That's something my parents never gave me.

It's a lonely world out there. It's going to be a lot less lonely with my

Well, what about us, Henrietta?

JJ, we can still keep seeing each other. Nothing's changed that.

Yeah, I know. We can go out and have two Big Macs and one Little Mac.

Henrietta, I wish I didn't have to say this.

Because I think I know how you feel.

But, honey, you're only going to be hurting that baby.

Life for both of you is going to be pure hell.

I got nothing else.

I'm willing to take that chance.

Well, I guess I better go.

Henrietta, don't go. Stay for a while, please.

J .J., you're a really beautiful dude.

It's been really nice meeting all of you all.

Really, it has.

Bye. Goodbye, sweetheart.

And remember, if you ever need us, we're right here.

Am I terrible?

I feel sorry for her, but I'm glad it's not me.

Yeah, but for the grace of God, Thelma.

No, there's nothing to be ashamed of in what you're thinking.

Now, if y 'all do with the birds and the bees, let's get down with some black

-eyed peas.

Just looking out of the window, watching the asphalt grow,

thinking how it all looks and we die.

Good times, good times,

keeping your head up for water,

making a wave when you can.

Temporary layoffs. Good times.

Good times is recorded on tape before a live audience.

If we're lucky, we got them.

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