Original subtitles

From Television City in Hollywood.

Good times. In a town you need a payment. Good times. In a town you need

friend. Good times. In a town you're out for Monday.

Not getting hassled. Not getting hustled.

Keeping your head above water.

Making a wave when you can.

Temporary layoffs. Good times. Easy credit ripoffs. Good times.

Stretching and...

You don't need a bathroom. You need an assembly line.

Boy, that girl will drive you crazy with all that makeup.

She does lay it on a little heavy.

Yesterday, I stepped on one of her false eyelashes.

I thought I had killed a centipede.

Hey, Mama.

Make sure you iron that shirt real smooth.

Because the girl I'm going out with tonight likes to touch me a lot.

of the project.

Four dates this week and each one with a different girl.

What can I say, mama? When you're hot, you're hot.

Right now, the two things that most demand around here are me and gasoline.

You know, you do have the same build as a gas hole.

I'll be right back.

I gotta go downstairs.

We're out of mouthwash.

You gonna make a special trip for that?

Yeah.

tonight's in a special life -saving category.

I expect to do a lot of mouth -to -mouth resuscitation.

Hi, J .J.

Where's Junior Longlegs going in such a hurry?

To get some mouthwash. He's got another heavy date tonight.

Oh, well, that boy's really grown up. You know, I remember when the only thing

he had on his mind... was making the basketball team.

Now he's trying out for the cheerleaders.

All sorted.

Oh, well, Lona, heat up the coffee.

Coming right up.

Mama, you pressing my dress yet?

I'm just getting started.

Someday when I want a vacation, I'm going to take a job as a maid.

Well, it's Saturday night and you got yourself a couple of teenagers.

Yeah, well, not too happy about Thelma's date.

She's going out with a 21 -year -old boy.

Well, what are you worried about?

Thelma's 16.

When I was 16, I went out with 21 -year -old boys and...

You know, Florida,

maybe you got something to worry about.

Hi, sweetie.

And if you're in a hurry for this dress, I got a little ways to go, yeah.

Thanks for giving me the rest of the night off.

You know, tell me your daddy and I still ain't too pleased with this boy you're

going out with tonight.

Mama, you and daddy still on that...

Oh, 16.

What a great age.

That's when you meet the most wonderful guy in your whole life every week.

Did you see how starry -eyed she was when she talked about him? Yeah.

We had that same starry -eyed look when we were young.

I remember you and Jimmy Phillips.

What about you and Charlie Ketchum?

The motor was too fast for me.

He took me to see a Lena Horne picture.

And when I felt his arms going around me, I froze.

While Lena was on the screen singing Stormy Weather, I was in the balcony

singing Show Me the Way to Go Home.

That was a lot of years and 50 pounds ago.

All the boys used to call you the girl with the dangerous curves.

Well, the curves are still here.

But they've widened the road a little.

I found this heavy new mouthwash.

It's called Control Tower.

Who's he going out with tonight?

Some girl named Gloria.

Last night it was Charlotte.

Two nights before that, it was Linda.

And the night before that, it was Barbara.

Sounds like a basketball schedule.

Play two nights, rest one night.

Now, he may be a wild tiger now, but someday that one girl's going to hook

and zap.

One skinny, tame house cat.

Let me see.

Uh -huh.

Pretty heavy stuff.

Now, here's something that's interesting. I'm not interested.

It says the mail. Let me see that.

That J .J.

I'll make him sorry he brought garbage like this into this house. Now, how do

you know it was J .J.? It might have been James.

Well, Anna, we've been married for 18 years, and I got news for you.

James don't need no instructions.

JJ's 17.

Today, kids read that kind of stuff.

I don't like what's going on, and I don't want my kids exposed to it. What

you going to do, Florida? It's a whole new world.

Well, personally, I like the old world better.

JJ, come out of there. I want to talk to you.

JJ, come out here.

Yeah, Mom.

JJ, how do you explain this?

I don't know. If they can't explain it in here, I sure can.

play some more. Oh, Mama, what you trying to do? I could get a heart

Then go into my room and do your homework.

Already did my homework. Michael!

Mama, why you trying to get rid of me?

Does it have something to do with what you're hiding behind your back?

Now, Mama, this is probably Michael. Oh, don't be ridiculous.

He does the most reading.

I told you. Yes, ma 'am.

J .J., you ought to be ashamed of yourself blaming an 11 -year -old boy

reading such trash.

Well, if he reads this, he ain't gonna be 11 long.

Michael wouldn't be interested in that stuff anyway, right, Graham?

That's right.

I'm only interested in stuff that'll help the black community.

If it wasn't for stuff like that, there wouldn't be no black...

Lay down a bet on the fight.

We got troubles.

Well, we really gonna have trouble if you don't give me some sugar.

Hi, James.

Hey, well, don't I see you got your usual ringside seat?

Look here, Florida.

Before you hit me with your fuss of the day, let me hit you with mine.

It's been on my mind all day, and I still don't like the idea of Thelma

out with this 21 -year -old boy.

That don't even make the top 30 on the bus charts.

Look at what J .J. brought into this house.

Sexual behavior in the ghetto.

Now, hold on, Dad. I ain't have nothing to do with this.

Oh,

you son of a gun.

James! Oh, baby, you call this serious?

A boy his age want to know about these things? It's the most normal thing in

world.

And he ain't a boy no more. Shucks, he's a man.

Come here, Jody.

I can't blame you for wanting to find out something else, though. I didn't

dog you.

You know, son, I was just like you when I was your age, a kid back in

Mississippi.

Did all right with the girls, too.

I bet you were.

Dino Mike.

I was nitroglycerin.

Of course, that was before I met your mother.

Boy, the chicks used to line up just waiting for a ride in that big black

limousine. Big black limousine?

Why don't you drive a big black limousine, Dad?

Well, I used to drive a friend's hearse.

Oh, it's so nice to see a father and son talking things over. Oh, shut up,

Willow.

Father and son, huh? They look more like a couple of sailors on weekend passes.

Well, I gotta get ready for my date.

Look here, Junie. If you're making time in the hallway, don't lean up against no

doorbells.

That's a fine way to raise your son, James.

What you planning for him next?

A job as an usher in a pussycat theater?

Well, I hate to give him my ringside seat, but I am totally disgusted by this

whole discussion on sexual behavior in the ghetto. Well, let me relieve you

again.

Now, James, about J .J. and this.

Oh, baby, you're getting upset about nothing.

Nothing?

Trash nothing?

That's right, nothing.

I mean, it's perfectly normal for a kid his age to be interested in these

things. And it ain't a filthy piece of trash.

And I'm surprised at you for being so old -fashioned.

Old -fashioned? Mm -hmm.

Because there's stuff like that.

It's not what you think. It's educational.

Educational. Where was it printed?

Pornotech?

James, there's no need to shout at the girl.

Florida, what's wrong with you? Ain't you as upset about this as I am? Well,

not exactly thrilled, but I'm also a little confused.

About what?

A little while ago when you thought it was J .J. reading this stuff, it was

Hallelujah time.

Now that you find out that it's Thelma's, you want to call in the

girls and boys.

No kidding.

You must have read the first page.

You know what I mean. Boys don't get pregnant.

No, but they're usually somewhere around the scene of the crime.

Will you stop trying to defend your daughter?

I just hope your 21 -year -old boyfriend knows that.

Daddy, he's a wonderful person, and you're making him sound like a lecherous

man. All right, baby, I'm sorry.

He's a lecherous young man.

Tell me, why can't you go out with boys your own age?

You were three years older than me.

That's different, babe. You was old for your age.

He's going to stay that way.

I just say, Eddie, she can't go out this evening.

She got a fever of 105 degrees.

Then I'll throw him down the stairs.

that concerns you, son. Go back in your room and study.

Oh, Mama, why is it that every time something goes on around here, I gotta

back in my room and study?

You know, I'm gonna be smart in school, but I sure am gonna be stupid to what's

happening around here.

Go on back in your room. Daddy! Don't daddy me. Go on back in your room now.

James.

Your daughter is in there crying.

Oh, baby, you got to understand, I love our sons, both of them, but Selma's the

only daughter we got, baby. She's special.

She's my little girl.

Little girl?

Have you had a good look at her lately?

Yeah, and that's what scares the hell out of me.

I know we raised her right, and I know she know right from wrong, but 21 years

old, I... Oh, James.

Did you see the look in her eyes when she started talking about him?

I had the same glow on my face when I told my parents about you.

Yeah, well, you had reason to glow.

Well, so has she.

Now, Eddie is somebody special. He's going to be a college professor.

So I use a lot of big words you don't understand.

Oh, that's him now.

Look, this is a very special moment for Thelma.

Well... Come on, at least talk to him. Okay.

But I ain't gonna let him snow me.

Hi, I'm Eddie Conroy.

Is this the Evans apartment?

Well, it ain't unless you make a deal.

about a half an hour. Oh, she'll be ready in a little while. You know how

are. Yes. Yeah, I bet you.

Oh, please.

Won't you sit down?

Yes, thank you.

Would you like a drink?

A cup of coffee?

A soda for her? No, thanks.

Why don't you offer him a belt of booze? He's 21, ain't he?

How did a dude like you ever meet my daughter?

Well, I interviewed her while I was doing my research.

Research? Yes, I'm completing a thesis for my master's. Thesis?

This cat even use short words you don't understand.

You see there, James?

He interviewed Velma for his thesis. What's it about?

Well, it's called sexual behavior in the ghetto.

my more interesting subjects.

You wrote about my daughter in this here thing?

She's page 25.

You see that? I told you, when a 21 -year -old cat go out with a 16 -year

girl, he ain't looking for no ice cream.

I don't understand.

I understand you wrote a dirty, filthy piece of trash here, and I don't

appreciate you getting my daughter mixed up in it.

I told you, 21 years old ain't nothing but trouble. I ought to drop it. Oh,

Jeff.

A foolish thesis can't be dirty, can it?

I interviewed a cross -section of ghetto residents and asked them about their

sexual behavior.

Well, it still don't sound like Mother Goose to me.

Tell me one thing, baby. What do I say on page 25?

My interview with Thelma helped to prove a strong theory I have.

You see, in broken homes with just one parent, there's a high percentage of

loose attitudes towards sex.

He is right, James.

with a solid family foundation, especially a strong father figure, the

of unwanted pregnancies is almost non -existent.

You mean, page 25 is clean? Sure.

And that's all Thelma's interview is all about.

It makes real nice reading, too.

What did you say was the reason for Thelma's low, uh... Incidence.

Yeah. Homes with a solid...

Family Foundation.

No, I mean the part after that. Oh, strong father figures.

Yeah.

All right. You take care of my little girl now.

If Eddie needs some more work on his thesis, he can come up here and fire

anytime because, like he said in the paper, I'm an expert on how to raise

right? Right.

bad scene, man.

I knocked on the girl's door, her father answered the door, smelled the

mouthwash on my breath.

Just looking out of the window, watching the asphalt road,

thinking how it all looks when you die.

Good times, good times, keeping your head above water,

making a wave when you can.

Temporary layoffs, good times.

Good Times is recorded on tape before a live audience.