Original subtitles

From Television City in Hollywood.

Scratching and surviving.

Good times.

Hanging in a jar.

Good times.

If we lucky, we got them.

Good times.

Thelma, run down to the shoemakers and get Michael's shoes from the shop before

he closes.

Junior, I guess you're going to have to go.

Oh, Mama, why I got to go?

Why can't Michael go?

Because I got no shoes.

Michael.

Oh, yesterday I had to take them down. Today I got to bring them back. I'm

wearing out my shoes getting hit.

Let's go.

Hey, J .J., while you're at it, here's a dollar. Give me a tube of soft and

satin pretty lips.

pair of lips on you myself.

And a face to go along with it.

Why don't you grow a beard and disappear in it?

The only thing I want to hear is that front doe hitting your backside.

Now get the child's shoes before he grows out of them.

Look at this.

17 -year -old flunky for an 11 -year -old midget.

Color TV.

We don't need no color TV.

We know the sky is blue and the grass is green.

Are you miserable?

Are you unhappy?

Well, I'm Reverend Sam, your happiness man.

With a personal message to you from God.

God told me to come to Chicago because there are so many... Hey, Mama, there's

Reverend Sam.

Ain't he the preacher Daddy knows? But wait.

When he sees what you're up to, watch out, brother.

I hate a phony.

If you hate him, why you watch him?

Because hate is such a good emotion. I don't want to waste it on somebody I

don't know.

Son, I'll go to the stadium tonight and let me, Reverend Sam, lighten your

burden. And empty your pockets.

Michael, turn that thing off.

Hey, what y 'all talking about? That's my good friend...

Sam on that.

If he's your friend, why don't he answer some of your phone calls?

You must have left a dozen messages.

Oh, he'll get in touch with me, baby. You'll see.

You know how busy the man is.

Sure, he's been busy ripping off poor folks.

Oh, now, come on, baby. You got to stop that talk about smiling Sam to happen

this man.

When we was in the army, we was best friends.

Yeah, except then he was Buck Private Sam, the latrine orderly man.

No, son, he was... Well, what he was, was... He was a crapshooter.

He was out of sight, too.

I tell you, when Sam had those dice, he couldn't lose for winning. Baby, it was

like they was blessed.

James, that's blasphemy.

Could also have been loaded dice.

No, son, Sam didn't need that job.

I tell you, I never will forget the night old Sam cleaned out a bunch of non

-coms in the company chapel.

James, you were shooting dice in the house of the Lord?

That's all right, baby. We was on our knees all the time.

Anyway, we was walking back to the barracks, see?

And Sam turned to me and said, James, I believe we're being followed.

I turned around, and sure enough, there's a whole battalion of sore losers

behind me. So Sam handed me his winnings and said, James, you run faster than

me, so take the money and split.

Did you both manage to split, Daddy?

Well, sort of, son.

I split with the money, but they split Sam.

He was the first war casualty of the latrine to tell.

From what I saw on TV this morning, he ain't off that detail yet.

Hey, you gotta stop that talk, because that's when we got real close.

You know, the next day I went to see him in the infirmary, and I took him back

every penny.

You know what he called me after that?

Honest James.

You know what I call him?

Jesse James.

is using religion like a hustle.

Oh, now, baby, get off of Sam's case. That's my good buddy. I want you to stop

talking like that, especially when he comes around to call on me. Now, it'll

the day.

Now, you laugh if you want to, but just suppose, just suppose now that that was

Sam right outside the door. If that's Sam outside this door, I'll shine your

shoes in Marshall Field's window.

Look at you now. Oh, don't let these rocks and rags fool you, James.

They don't fool me.

Sam, this is my wife, Florida.

She shines shoes at Marshall Fields.

A good book says a good wife is the peculiar gift of heaven.

Ain't that nice the way you put that, baby?

James married.

I'll be damned.

In due time.

Sam, I want you to meet my youngest son, Michael. I've been telling him all

about you.

Hello, Michael. I suppose you know me pretty well, son.

Well enough not to shoot craps with you.

How did you ever get to be a reverend? Well, Michael, I simply got the calling.

You know, Mr. Florida, I turned away from a life of sin and took the vows to

God's work.

I see none of them vows included poverty.

For a sister, he who toils in God's garden shares the abundant harvest.

How much of that harvest did you share with the black community?

Michael, go to your room.

James, I can certainly see you have a strong and loyal family.

You know, I've been trying to contact you for days.

Now, see, baby, what did I tell you? I need you, my good friend. God needs you.

I want to offer you a position in my crusade. Me?

Work in your crusade?

Doing what, Sam?

James is a good man, but when it comes to being religious, he ain't made it to

the back pew yet.

Sister, I don't need a religious man.

I need an honest man.

You see, my collection's been coming in a little shy lately, and I've had the

strong feeling that while I'm at the pulpit spreading the good word, my

are in the john splitting the big tape.

Man, there's a black, long Cadillac parked outside with God is here signs

hanging on the door.

Sam, I want you to meet my oldest son, James Junior. Junior, this is Reverend

Sam. Is that your Cadillac out there?

That's the biggest hog I ever... ever seen.

Well, son, the Lord watches over me. Well, he must have blinked because one

your hubcaps is missing.

The happiness, man.

Dynamite. I dug you on the tube, man.

Them thrills.

on a first -name basis.

My friend Sam wants me to go to work for him.

Far out.

Now that's the kind of religion I can get into.

The good word rolls out and the long green rolls in.

J .J., did you get my... Hello?

You're Reverend Sam!

Sam, this is my daughter, Thelma. Isn't she a little doll?

I can certainly see where she gets her fine looks.

So can I.

From the corner drugstore.

But for you, my pretty, do you have a Bible handy?

Sure, I'll get you Mama's. No, you don't.

Nobody signs my Bible but the original author.

Now you go to your room and help Michael with his homework.

Mama. So, I'll go.

Baby, would you mind making us some coffee, please?

Have a seat, Sam.

Well, as I was saying, James, trust is the name of the game when you're working

for the Lord, and I need a man I can trust.

I need my old buddy, Honest James.

You really think I can help you? Positive.

When my ushers drive better cars than I, I need help.

He has a Cadillac outside. It's fine.

As this dude right here.

I've seen you somewhere.

You're that preacher who makes more money on television than Bob Hope and

Fox put together.

What you doing here?

A business. This is slow, so he's making house calls.

I'm Wilona, a friend of the family.

Well, any friend of this family is a particular friend of mine.

I'm delighted to meet you, Wilona.

Ooh, honey.

You are smooth.

You know what, Reverend?

You got your things so together, I... I almost sent you a dollar once.

And sister, you should give in to those charitable feelings. They come from the

Lord. This dollar came from the devil.

It was alimony money.

You were divorced.

Yes, but not desperate.

boutique shop this afternoon.

Who? Izzy Mae Patterson.

The woman has the weight -watching place?

The one who's always bragging about a perfect size 8?

Well, now she's a perfect size 14.

Because of her diet? Nope. Because of her husband.

Oh, no.

I don't know, Sam.

I got a job now, and it pays pretty good.

You think you can beat $250 an hour?

I think so.

What about $100 a day?

$100 a day?

I mean $100 a day, seven days a week.

That's $700 a week.

What's wrong on us, James? Not enough?

No, I didn't mean it like that. It's just that I didn't know that honest men

were that expensive.

I know what you mean, but... put your mind at rest.

James, I'm not selling anything but happiness.

Now, why don't you and your whole family come down to the revival meeting

tonight and you'll see the kind of joy I bring to my following.

What do you say?

A hundred dollars a day.

Now, James, tonight is my last night in Chicago.

I have to catch the midnight plane.

I must have your answer by then.

You have it.

Florida?

Sam has invited us all to a revival meeting tonight.

What does he need us for? To dry him off after he walked the water?

Sister Florida, you doubt me now, but seeing is believing.

And you will believe when you see all those sad people walking

in disgruntled, dispirited,

disillusioned, despair.

Nobody makes that kind of money legally.

Baby, you gotta give Sam a break.

Hell, woman, give me a break.

A hundred dollars a day. Come on, you've got to come to that meeting tonight.

All right.

All right.

and the ushers was collecting.

Clems, how could you go anywhere with that, the hypocrite?

Hypocrite? Mama, all those people believed he was the shepherd of the

I knew he was the shepherd when I saw him fleecing the sheep.

And what about the cat in the wheelchair?

Yeah.

I'm going to go pack.

James.

James.

James.

James.

I know you want what's best for us, but I don't want you running around the

country with that wolf in God's clothing.

I mean, this is a chance for me to give you and the kids something to build a

life on. Then think about the kids.

We're trying to teach them honesty.

What are they going to think when you run around town with scheming Sam to rip

off...

offered me a job making $100 a day.

If I lived to be 1 ,000 years old, I ain't gonna get another chance like

Think what we could do with the money. We could send Michael to law school, J

.J. to art school. We could even give Thelma a dancing lesson. Yeah, sure.

So she could jump out of a wheelchair and boogie, huh?

Well, that was some revival meeting.

I never saw so many fabulous clothes in one place in my life.

Maybe so, honey, but they were all on Reverend Sam and his people.

What's the matter, Winona? Don't you dig the ref?

Three in this life, or in the next one either, Reverend Sam has a concession.

I don't know a loner. He seemed to be doing people a whole lot of good.

Yeah, he kept talking about all of us being equal.

Sure. When the meeting was over, we both left in equally expensive vehicles.

Only ours was an old city bus, and his was a customized Cadillac.

Well, I don't care what anyone says.

I like Reverend Sam.

Well...

out there tonight, Rev. Pure dynamite. You sure was.

But you didn't light my fuse.

My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my. Still a non -believer, eh?

One of the sadnesses of my calling is that you simply can't reach everyone.

And you got some reach, Reverend.

have to work for a living.

Wow. You and Dad are going to some great places.

Does your crusade go to Hollywood?

Why not?

I can see it now.

Reverend Sam starring in Blackula Gets Religion.

That way, you can get the blood and the money at the same time.

Would you see if your daddy is ready?

Now, baby, this is something I got to do.

And I'd feel a lot better about it if I knew I was going with your blessing.

I can't give it to you for that.

I don't want you away from the kids.

They need you.

I don't want you away from me. I need you.

Baby, I ain't going to say this but one more time.

A hundred dollars a day.

Baby, without money... money. People like us ain't got no chance at all. But

ain't always gonna be that way, James.

It says so right in the Bible.

The day will come when the lion will lay down with the lamb.

Yeah, but only the lion gonna get up.

Ready to roll, Sam.

Fine, James.

And I bet you're going with your good woman's blessings.

You lose that bet.

Sister Florida, I do the Lord's work.

I heard that help was hard to get, but I didn't know the Lord was desperate.

I'll get it.

Reverend Sam, we have to go if you want to catch that plane.

You're right. And Ed, I'd like you to meet my old friend James Evans. He'll be

traveling with us for a while. Oh, that's great.

Our next stop is Philadelphia.

It's a good time for you to take over the wheelchair game.

The wheelchair game.

It's the boogie woogie

But you know what worked better than an old man getting healed?

A poor kid getting healed.

Like me.

Picture this.

I come down the aisle in a wheelchair.

Everybody's watching me, right?

I get down.

What do you say, James?

There's always room on God's train for one more.

You can make that room for two more, Sam, because he ain't going and I ain't

going. James, you're passing up a golden opportunity.

Sam, they don't print enough money to make me ruin my son's life.

Come on, Dad.

Let me get something going. Hey, shut up.

We don't roar.

We don't fight.

But we're going to score tonight.

Still honest dreams.

I'll be seeing you. So long.

Baby, I don't know what...

I guess the numbers just started dancing in front of my eyes.

Can you ever forgive me?

Can I forgive you?

And I say to you, God is with you every minute. And when

I'm lost and don't know where to turn, I call out to God, Lord.

Just looking out of the window, watching the asphalt road.

Keeping your head up for water,

making a wave when you can.

Temporary layoffs. Good times.

Easy credit ripoffs. Good times. Good times is recorded on tape before a live

audience.