All language subtitles for Girlfriends s03e18 Runaway Bridesmaid

This whole bride thing is even more
fabulous than I imagined.

These people can't get enough of me.

Hello, Tony. This is an engagement party
for you and Todd.

Not the Tony Child show.

Oh, honey, I don't know what channel
you're on, but this is the all -Tony

network. All -Tony.

All the time.

Okay, Tony, where is Todd anyway? You
did invite him, right? I think I did.

Wait a minute.

Oh! Of course I did. I checked the list.
He was on it. You know your man's a

munchkin. He may have gotten lost in the
crowd.

Did you just take a hit on my intended?

I thought I told you once I had the rock
on my hand, all it had to stop.

Now, where's my man?

Todd, honey, if you're out there, just
throw a napkin in the air.

There he is.

person to walk in here without a gift,
then head straight over to the open bar.

We were supposed to bring gifts?

Tony, gifts aren't required to bring
gifts to an engagement party.

Oh, so nobody up in here brought a gift?
Brought a gift? Honey, I was coming for

a little party favor when I left.

Maya, this is an engagement party, not
one of Jambalaya's birthday parties.

That's it, the bar's going cash.

Hey, you all better hurry up. Rumor is
the bar is going cash.

Take note.

You don't bring nothing, you don't get
nothing, so y 'all best not come up

at the next party. What next party?

Oh, so the band, the cake, the flowers
just gonna up -pick themselves?

You're not having a party to do all
that. No.

I'm having three parties to do all that.
I plan on having a party every weekend

until the wedding.

Tony, you can't have a party every
weekend for a year.

Relax. I'm getting married in two
months.

Joan Clayton can't plan a fabulous
wedding in two months. I can't do it.

Oh, that's okay because you're not
planning it.

I'm not the wedding planner?

Tony.

Joan. Tony.

Joan, you know how you are.

What? How am I?

Joan, do not play dumb, girl. We nearly
came to blows over my wedding.

Tony, I don't want you working my
wedding.

I want you by my side, being my best
friend.

Okay. Okay.

Yay.

May I have your attention, please?

Oh, uh -uh.

Tony, these hors d 'oeuvres are great.
Oh, did you bring a gift?

Oh, well. Oh, God.

First of all, we'd like to thank you all
for coming to Tony's engagement party.

Ha ha, very funny.

Don't quit your day job. Ah, I risk
losing you, dear, never.

Anyhoo, thank you all for coming to
share this first of many evenings with

Schedules are at the door next to the
empty...

Gift table?

Let it go.

I didn't think the day would come when I
would find someone so special,

so perfect for me.

I mean, I find those qualities all the
time in the Neiman's shoe department,

but... But finding those qualities in a
man was just...

It's a little harder.

First, I'm a little concerned about the
shoe analogy since Tony owns 3 ,000

pairs.

These guys were made for each other. I
mean, it's just like a... Oh, my God,

Ellen. I'm sorry.

But seriously, folks, from the first
moment I laid eyes on this woman,

inside me knew that she was a keeper.

Okay, Ellen, I need to go and get this
out. But they're still toasting. Well,

the stain is gonna...

Toastin' will be over in two minutes,
and you can't even see it. I'll be right

back, okay? I am so lucky.

I love you, Tony.

Oh, I love you, too.

Now, could you bring me a gift?

Every bride needs something blue.

You see?

That's why I'm marrying him.

To Tony and Todd!

Hey, come on.

Time to wake up.

Come on, sleepyhead.

Wait a minute.

There's coffee and bagels. What time is
it?

What? Huh?

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Ellis, it's almost 8 o 'clock. Why
didn't you wake me up? Because when the

went off, you beat the crap out of it. I
did not want to suffer the same fate.

Thanks a lot, Ellis. I wanted to go
running, but because of you, that's shot

hell. Me? If it weren't for me, you'd
still be asleep.

Ellis, the marathon is in two weeks.

I didn't know you were still running the
marathon.

Why wouldn't I be? Because you haven't
mentioned it in months.

Well, I am.

And it would be really nice if the man
of my life would support me for once.

What the hell is that supposed to mean?
I just really needed to go running,

okay? Fine. Go run, please.

Well, I can't go now.

Ellis, I have a schedule. I have a J -O
-B. If I go running now, my hair is

going to get all frizzy. And then I
won't have time to do anything to it

I go to work. And I'll have to go to
work with jacked up hair. Is that what

want? Huh?

For me to go to work as a big -ass pro?

really have to get Tony a gift for every
one of these stupid pre -wedding

parties? Well, if we don't, we're only
going to look foolish when everybody

does.

But if nobody does it, she'll look
foolish.

So, nobody does it. Agree?

Agree.

That's great. So, do the same rules
apply for the wedding?

No. We have to get her a wedding gift.
Why? I cannot afford to get Tony that

expensive crap she expects.

But, you know, hey, why don't the three
of us do it together?

Yeah. And while we're having the
threesome, we'll decide on a gift.

Hey, you know what? I know what we can
get her. How about having a tree

oh, or star named in their honor on the
day of the wedding? Wouldn't that rock?

Okay, Lane, all that right there is why
people register.

No, women register because they've been
brainwashed into believing that somehow

a new set of dishes and top -of -the
-line cutlery will lessen the pain of

entering into an archaic institution put
in place to oppress them.

Okay, you won't be writing the card.

No, I'm with Lynn.

Registries are for the women. I say we
buck the system and get something title

-like, like an Xbox or stripper.

Stripper with an Xbox.

No, no, no. You know what? Just leave us
a blank check, and we'll get the gift.

Okay, so what's our limit?

Um, I don't know. $300?

Whoa, that is one high -class stripper.

All right, three people, $300.

Seems clear.

$300, yeah. So, William, you'll pay
$175, you pay $100, and I'll pay $25.

I think when you had that baby in high
school, you let a couple of those math

classes slide.

Because I need your money, I'm going to
let you slide. At least until we buy

this wedding gift. But then it's going
to be all like popcorn.

Apparently, you let a couple of those
English classes slide, too.

Oh, honey, look at you. You can hardly
walk.

Ellis, it's a marathon.

I don't need to be able to walk. I need
to be able to run.

I think you're overdoing it.

Maybe you should wait until next year to
run the marathon.

Oh, so what are you saying?

You don't think I can do it?

You think I'm weak? You think I'm a
quitter?

No, I'm just saying you can't cram for a
marathon.

Why not?

Cramming works for me. I cram for the
bar exam and I kick butt.

I cram for my first date with you and
you actually believe that I've seen all

your movies.

So cramming is a friend to Joan Clayton.

Unlike some people.

God, what is going on with you? No,
what's going on with you? Why can't you

be there for me, Alice?

I'm starting to wonder why I'm here at
all.

You really... Okay, slow your roll.

Just nod and smile.

Welcome to the Los Angeles Marathon.

Alice.

Alice, I don't think I can do it.

Maybe you were right. Maybe I should
wait till next year. Joan, you've come

far. You can do this. No, I can't.
You're just nervous.

That I can't do it. Joan, look at me.
Look at me. Okay.

One of the reasons why I admire you is
because of your determination and your

conviction. You can do this. You really
think I can do it? You can do this. I

can. Yes.

I can do it, huh? Yes. Yes.

Yes. What can you do? This. Go do it.

Go do it.

Okay.

I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it.

I know you couldn't, but hey, you'll get
him next year, huh?

Take it to mile one. Yeah, I know you
didn't, but you'll make it to two next

year. Okay.

Hey,

where is she? On the couch.

Jay Clay!

What happened to you? We're waiting for
hours for you at mile five.

Yeah, you had us standing on that corner
looking like Boo Boo the Fool.

Wait a minute, we were a couple minutes
late.

You weren't up in front with the Kenyan
woman, were you?

I never made it to mile five.

Hell, I never made it to mile one.

Her leg cramped up.

Well, I hope you got a cramp in your
hand.

Because that's the only thing that could
explain why the hell you didn't call

us.

Come on, guys, give her a break. She's
had a really tough day.

She had a tough day.

Obviously, you've never done your
business in a port -a -potty in haute

Here, it's time to ice again.

Oh, I told you, I don't want that. Well,
you need it. What I needed was to train

for the marathon for the past six
months. Yeah, I agree.

Uh, so what are you saying?

What are you saying, I'm some sort of
dummy who can't finish what she starts?

Huh? Oh, okay. We done walked in on some
issues. Go do it.

You know what?

What you want with the ice?

Okay, did you just throw something at
me? Because my mama doesn't throw

at me. What is wrong with you? Are you
on your period or something?

Snap, snap.

It's all like popcorn.

Okay, so why does my problem have to be
with my period? Why can't my problem be

with you?

I don't have time for this. I'm out of
here. Okay, don't you dare walk out on

me.

We are going to deal with this right
now. Deal with what?

What is it this time, crazy woman?

Did I leave a hair in the shower?

Or did I forget to put the milk back so
the label will show?

Don't patronize me after everything that
I've given up for this relationship.

Given up? What have you given up? I
mean, besides your sanity.

And sex. And sex. Whatever happened to
that?

Oh, so this is all about your needs?

What about my needs, Alice? I was
supposed to finish the marathon, and I

because of you.

What? The fact you didn't finish is my
fault?

I'm supposed to be off men, focusing on
the marathon. on finally doing something

for Joan.

Something that I could actually feel
good about. But no, I had to go and meet

you. And you wanted to go to this great
little Moroccan place four times a week.

And my crazy ass said, sure, I love
Moroccan food when everybody knows that

hate Moroccan food.

What the hell are you talking about? I
am talking about how I'm sitting there

that stupid pillow just propped up
eating with my hands when I should have

training for the damn marathon.

I'm talking about how I just give...

I'm not there for you? Who scraped you
off the damn street today? That is the

least you could do after everything that
you put me through.

Your baby's mama drama?

You're whining about your career? What
about my career, Alex? You didn't say

when I didn't make partners. Don't make
up your damn mind. You said you were

okay with it. That's because I knew you
weren't interested in talking about it.

Because there you were just propped up
on your pillow like the Grand Poopta,

stuffing your face with a cookie.

If you hate Moroccan food so much, why
didn't you say something?

Because I'm a good...

Girlfriend. But do you appreciate that?

No. You just rate me a five and a half.

What are you doing, Ellis, huh? What are
you, slumming?

Dating the dog -faced girl?

Not anymore, I'm not.

Yeah, go ahead.

Go ahead, just walk out like the rest of
them. Go on.

I mean, I didn't want to wreck her flow,
but what the hell is a ground poof day?

Tony is tripping with this wedding
registry.

A $2 ,000 gas drill, a boat she refers
to as the FF's Fabuloso,

and directions to her dream house. Who
registers for her dream house?

She saw it in my big, fat Greek wedding.
Okay, well, you know what? Somebody

needs to tell her that she's having a
big, fat Fresno country folk wedding.

And they don't roll like that.

Neither do we. This registry is
outrageous. There's nothing on here for

Oh, yes, there is.

Page 31, the solid gold chopstick.

Yeah, we could give them that.

If they're lucky, someone will buy them
the other one.

All right, looks like we have to up the
budget.

Well, all right, I guess I can't kick in
a little bit more now that we don't

have to worry about Joan getting married
in this lifetime.

So there's like an extra $5 right there.

Joan drove another one away. Oh, big
time. And we had front row seats.

I mean, I've always been there for the
aftermath, but I've never actually seen

how she does it. Yeah.

It was exciting.

Scary.

Yeah, yeah, she's my girl, but you know
what? I don't know who's ever going to

be crazy enough to marry that.

In her defense, she was on her period.

How you doing?

Well, you said Joan was on her period,
right?

Mm -hmm.

I know how you gals sync up, and I just
wanted to get out of here before one of

you snaps and drives me home.

You know, I can't decide between the
burnt sugar buttercream and the hazelnut

ganache. Lynn, you can't keep getting
back in line for the tasting. Not an all

-you -can -eat buffet, okay?

So save some for the other folks.

Everybody's got a vote.

Joan, come on, try the, oh, the
chocolate chestnut with cognac, girl.

Fresno folks like the yak.

Oh, my gosh. I forgot my towels in the
dryer.

I don't want them to wrinkle. I'll be
right back. I'll be right back.

Girl, you better get back here and eat.
cake? No, no, two minutes. Just, it'll

be two minutes, Tony.

Tony, you know, I'm gonna say this to
you one more time, okay?

Costco sheet cake.

All right, order on Tuesday, get it on
Wednesday.

Oh, no, they'll write anything you want.
English, Espanol, Korean.

Oh, there's better be somebody with a
damn gift.

See?

Nobody brought a gift, and she looks
foolish.

party. Tony Charles cannot have any
drama today unless you brought a gift.

That's right. It's your cake parties
today. I'm sorry, Tony. With all that's

been going on, I forgot.

So is that a no on the gift?

Yes. Bye -bye. I'll come back later. You
do that.

No, no, no, no.

Tony, I asked him to come. Oh, girl.

Why didn't you tell me you guys made up
a plan to kick him out?

Well, we didn't.

Well, then he gotta go.

No, I need him to get his stuff.

Now? She's right, Joan. Now is maybe not
a good time. No, Ellis, come on. You're

about to do a movie and be on location
for two weeks. Come and get your stuff.

I'm shooting in Burbank.

Just come and get your stuff.

Joan, this is my talk. Two minutes,
okay?

Two minutes. You know, I'm not from
Fresno, but I can get with this yak.

Joan, why are we doing this now? This is
embarrassing.

Because I believe when something's over,
it needs to be over.

You're in the middle of your best
friend's party.

Well, that's everything.

If you're missing anything, there are
stores.

It's been fun.

Have a nice life.

You know, you have issues.

No, I don't.

You were my issue, and now you're gone,
so I'm easy like Sunday morning.

Right.

I'm your issue.

Not Tony and her wedding.

What? You know, nothing, okay?

You're obviously in denial, and I don't
want to fight anymore.

No, go ahead. Say it. Stand behind it.
Be a man about yours. What?

Okay, fine.

You want the truth? I'll give you the
truth. I don't think you can handle it,

but here it is.

All of this is not about us.

You're jealous of Tony.

That's crazy.

Is it?

You ran out on her toast.

You told me to come over here in the
middle of her party, and when I get

you're folding towels.

I mean, come on, Joan. Come on.

That's why the marathon popped up again.

Tony's won something, now Joan's got to
win something.

You are jealous of the fact that your
best friend is getting married.

Ellis, let me be clear.

You were my problem.

The way you never appreciated me in this
relationship was my problem.

So don't put my issues with you on my
best friend.

I don't have a problem with Tony or her
wedding. I am excited about it. I am

happy for her. Do you hear me?

I am happy for my best friend.

I am happy for her. I am happy for my
friend. Do you understand?

I'm happy for my friend. I am happy for
my friend. I'm happy. I am happy for my

friend.

I'm happy for her.

Okay, I'm happy for my friend.

I'm happy for my friend.

you to my best friend.

Uh, Tony, Joan's crying because she's
happy.

Happy we're back together.

Oh, though the love that Todd and I
share has inspired you both.

That's wonderful.

And here I was thinking Joan was jealous
of me getting married.

It's time to announce the winning cake.

Uh, Tony, don't you think we should get
Todd's vote?

Yeah. Where is it, anyway?

Oh, hell.

Everybody, look under the pillows.

Tony. I don't know, okay?

I'm pretty sure I put them on the list.

Now, the winner is... the chocolate
chestnut cognac!

It's my favorite, even though it's the
least expensive.

Oh, least expensive. Oh, you know what?
Lynn, William, and I will pay for it.

It'll be our wedding gift to you.

That's so sweet.

Now I can use that $2 ,000 on something
else.