Original subtitles

And Lord, please don't let me lose my family because I hooked up with that

man, Stan.

He's stalking me, Lord.

Becoming best friends with my husband, threatening to tell him about us.

And Lord, there is no us. It was just one nasty little kiss and God, you know

was nasty because I pray for you to heal my lip.

I know I was stupid, Lord, and I'm sorry.

But please help me keep my family.

Maya, next time you bless the food, bless the food.

What are you doing?

Practicing. The firm's softball season starts on Sunday, and if you want to be

my catcher, you're going to have to develop better reflexes than that.

Okay. Well, how about this reflex?

Bye, William.

I'm only William in the office.

On the field, my name's Catapult.

What? Every pitcher needs an intimidating nickname.

Mine will be Catapult.

That is so stupid.

I wasn't going to call you Catapult.

Clayton?

Catapult.

I'd like to introduce you to the newest addition to the firm's softball team.

Oh, hi.

I'm Joan Clayton.

Joan Clayton.

Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. I'm Chris Hennison.

Chris Hennison.

Well, looks like the kid's mocking you there, Joan Clayton. Joan Clayton.

That's funny, Mr.

Sweetleton. Mr. Sweetleton.

I guess that was one too many.

My name's Catapult. Oh, I got that.

Yeah, it was quite a coup landing, Chris, here. He's the new guy in the

building's mailroom, so he was up for grabs.

Well, let's cut to the chase. What position do you play?

Pretty much all of them.

Just know that I'm the pitcher.

That's my bailiwick.

All right. Well, I don't want to take anybody's bailiwick. Just looking to

a little fun and work up a sweat on the weekend.

Yeah, so, uh, Chris, let me introduce you to the infield. They're downstairs

detailing my car.

I'll see you later, Jo.

Bye.

So the catapult's invisible.

Rookie.

What's Stan doing here? I don't know. I asked Darnell to come and play today to

get away from Stan. I look up and see Stan's deranged, Cape Fear -looking ass

sitting in my back seat.

Oh. Oh.

Hey, Stan.

Tony? Lynn?

Nice day for a game, huh?

Perfect. Okay, look, why don't you just go away and leave Mai alone?

make you. Look, I'm from Fresno. I've castrated cows.

You'd be quick work.

Are you threatening me? That depends on what you're coming back with.

Okay, look, let's just ignore for a moment the fact that you castrate bulls,

cows. Sorry, Tony, that was just bugging me. Okay, Stan, we're all adults here.

We just start acting like adults.

You know, my business with Maya is none of your business.

Then we're telling Joe.

Joe who?

Hey, great. Why don't you warm up on the bench? Chris!

Don't get too comfortable, Denison.

The catapult's coming back.

No, you're not.

You think

after all that support and attention I gave

you, you'd have a little cheer for me?

I do.

Stan, Stan, go away. Die.

How about this?

Stan, Stan, go over there and tell Don now everything about us.

Okay, okay, okay, okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Okay, I'm just... And how long are you going to keep this up?

I told you that was for the surprise, now wouldn't it?

Hey. Did you see that, baby? Yes.

That home run was for you, girl.

You have a fun stand.

Oh, man, I could do this all day.

I'm just backing up like a pitcher's supposed to.

See?

Guess I owe you one.

Wait,

wait, wait, wait, wait.

Wait. No, I need to get a cushion.

I'm 30. I need something soft.

Well,

I would offer myself, but ain't nothing on me soft right now.

Jones, you say stuff like that and you sound like my mom.

Oh, I'm sorry.

That's not what I was going for.

Did you hear that?

Yeah,

you like how I mixed in that horn section?

That's my tribute to Duke, you know, a little old school.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's really great.

You're a really talented boy.

You should come down to the club sometime and listen to me drop some

You're so cute.

Listen, you just got to shut up with Dad.

I want you to come down here and shut me up, Dad.

talking about some things, like where you went last night after the game.

What do you mean?

I went home.

We went out to celebrate the win, but you weren't there. And coincidentally

enough, neither was Chris.

Someone's ears were burning.

Good morning, Chris.

Hello, team.

Joe, can I see you for a minute?

Oh, sure.

Come on.

You look great.

Oh, thank you.

Anyway,

I mixed this CD special for you.

Oh, God.

Thank you. You didn't have to go to all that trouble. It's no trouble. It's what

I do.

So, are you going to come down to Club Troika and watch me spin?

I'll put your name on the list, and I can even make sure you get a wristband.

A wristband?

Yeah, well, it's to drink. See, because it's an 18 and over club.

Oh.

Well, we could do that.

Or I could meet you afterwards at the Standard for a drink.

You can't drink, right?

Joan, I am old enough for whatever you have in mind.

So, uh, have a good day.

Yeah, you too.

He's the mail guy delivering the mail.

Anybody else's mail come gift her?

Not mine.

Okay, so what?

So we went out after the game. What is the big deal?

There's no big deal.

Tell me, though. Was he able to get his tricycle in the trunk of your car?

Okay, okay, okay, William. Come on now.

I mean, it's not like she's dating a four -year -old.

He has made it through puberty, hasn't he, Charlie?

Okay, you know what?

This is a plate of business. Why don't we act like it?

Oh, Clayton, I'm glad to hear you're keeping our star pitcher happy, but

go putting any happy meals on your expense account.

Now who's he going to take to the prom?

It's gotten worse.

Jabari's calling him Uncle Stan. Oh, damn.

There's only one thing left to do. You've got to tell Darnell the truth.

Girl, are you crazy?

No, Maya, but we took a vote and Stan is.

You tell Darnell first, and you get to put your spin on it.

Stan's a crazy stalker.

You didn't kiss him. He kissed you. Oh, you guys, I can't tell Darnell about

nobody kissing nobody.

Hey, what'd Chris say?

He's avoiding me.

I know his ass was there, but I had to leave a message with one of his sick

roommates.

Sick roommates?

Girl, let him go.

The thing is, I know he's pissed at me, and I could just walk away and leave it

there.

But on the other hand...

He's so damn cute.

Don't look. Your eggs are drying up. Don't waste your time on this little

God gave you a way out. Take it.

Whatever happened to you and God anyway?

I've been a little busy. He understands.

Men guys are a lot of work.

They have to listen to all their hopes and dreams and be all supportive.

Yeah, sure, you're going to be a great writer.

Yeah, sure, your group's going to get a record deal. Yeah, of course, you can

surf from L .A. to Australia.

I'm gonna check and see what happened to him.

Hey, all right, you know what, y 'all? Y 'all just need to let Joan do what she

wants to do, okay? None of us are in any position to be giving her advice.

Me especially.

I always had the advantage of moral superiority over all of you, but you

hey, now that's gone, so... All I gotta say is, Joan, go ahead and date him.

Can't sleep. I got some things on my mind.

Yeah, me too.

Listen, baby.

I really need to talk to you about something.

I know what it is.

You do?

What do you know?

I know that you've been unhappy.

And that I'm to blame.

Baby, it's me.

It's my fault, Darnell. It's all my fault. I am so sorry. I've been

unreasonable.

If you want to go back to college, then you should go back to college.

What?

You've been moping around here ever since we decided that you wasn't going

back to school until I got my business started.

Baby, I was tripping, all right? We both should be able to do our thing, all

right? We can figure it out.

Of course, Jabari going to have to get a job down at the car wash.

The boy can armor all some tires.

Don't know.

I'm just kidding.

But it wouldn't kill him to deliver some papers. I'm gonna get that boy. Hey,

hey, hey, hey.

You're not boy alone.

See, that's what I'll miss right there.

You laughing.

Maya, we need to have fun again.

Like the other day, just playing softball.

Up in the stands, cheering me on. It was like it was back in high school.

Only we didn't make out under the bleachers.

Baby, baby, I really need to tell you

something. I know, I know.

I love you, too.

Chris, Chris, hold up a second. What is it, Miss Clayton?

Please don't call me that.

I'm sorry, ma 'am.

Okay, you can go back to Miss Clayton.

Look, I'm really sorry about yesterday.

No, you're not.

You were embarrassed by me.

No, I am not.

I had fun with you, and I don't want to stop seeing you.

Yeah?

That's good, because, listen, I really like you.

I like you, too.

But look, here's the thing.

I was thinking that we could keep us on the DL.

I have a better idea.

Why don't we just keep us on the NO?

Okay. Yeah, I can do that. Is that a new thing, or...? No, no, wait, wait, wait,

wait. Please, let me explain. What? No, I just don't want people to... To what?

To see you hanging out with the kid from the mailroom? I want to be a

professional, okay?

Look, we're in the same workplace.

And I'm a little bit older than you. Just a little bit.

Look, decorum dictates that we exercise a little decorum.

Decorum. Yeah. Listen, Joan.

I'm proud of who I am.

Okay? And I'm proud of what I do. And I would never want to see anybody

privately that I couldn't see publicly.

Okay, please. Let me explain.

Look, I am not ashamed of you. Chris.

Chris. Chris, can you get me a sheet of those Lucille Ball stamps?

Thank you.

William?

William! William!

Nobody's talking to me. What is going on?

Haven't you heard?

Everybody hates you.

Pretty funny how you switched teams and made me the pariah.

Oh, jeez.

I'm still warm enough.

Look, this is not about your age or you working in the mailroom, okay?

If I were dating another lawyer in the firm, I'd want to keep that quiet, too.

Want to throw that ball back? Yeah, sorry, sorry.

Can we talk about this after the game?

Okay, fine.

You don't want to talk to me, don't talk to me.

Well, come on. Talk to me.

Take me out to the ball game.

Take me out to the crowd.

Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot you don't like my singing. Look, Dan, enough.

All right?

I'm not afraid of you anymore.

If you want to go and tell Darnell, tell him.

I just have to hope our marriage is strong enough to get it through.

I don't have to live in fear of you anymore.

Oh, you want me to tell Darnell?

Never. Oh, that's fine. You know what? Let's end this because I hate softball.

Hey, Darnell, come here for a sec, man.

What is it, man? I'm on deck.

Brother, I just wanted to let you know.

What, what, what? Don't tell me you're about to leave. I was going to try and

hook you up with Joan.

Thanks, man, but these L .A. women are a trip.

Well, I guess I got the last good one.

Oh, what's up? I gotta get back.

Well, man, you should know.

I gotta run, man. I can't stay.

Oh, all right. Well, I'll catch you later, then.

All right, bro.

You watch me. Yeah.

So,

what

does this mean?

You know, it's funny, Maya. When we first connected, It was because we liked

each other.

And now we have to part ways because we both liked our names.

I loved our names.

Well, I hope you start acting like it.

Hug time, Lou.

Hey, listen up, Clayton.

Okay, last inning, two outs. We're down by one run. No pressure. We're here to

have fun. Just hug the plate and make him hit you.

Everybody.

You sure you want to.

That's right.

We're dating.

You can heckle us all you want.

Who cares? Touch the plate.

Softball may not have been my forte, but the firm's basketball season is

starting soon.

I'm a shoe -in for center.

If there's one thing I know how to do, it's be tall.

Clayton, Dent, I'd like you to meet the new guy from accounting.

Tennis, anyone?