Original subtitles

When we got married, I took the merry -go -round. In sickness and in health, I

said I'll do.

For richer or poorer, I'll do just as I thought.

And you said such an honour and obey me too.

But it wasn't very long before I soon found out. The one who would have

is you.

Now after all these years of loss, I'm pushing you about.

But in sickness and in health, I love you.

See,

you just put your mind to it. It's quite easy to work this thing, really. You

just turn your wheels, see?

This one, not that one. You get dog's doos all over your hand, see?

Just turn... Well, what's that?

See, just turn the wheels like that.

Now, I'm at table... I'm just getting the hang of it, aren't I? Just get the

feel of it. Right, now.

Do you want to turn to the right? Right.

Like... Right hand down and just... No, that's table. And just try to show you

how it works. I know how it works.

Oh, there you are then.

There, that's all you've got to do.

And you're mobile.

It's all right, isn't it? I mean, that's not the end of the world, is it? Having

to sit in one of these things.

God, blimey. It's a shame you don't like football, really. Get a good seat in

one of these right on the touchline.

Nice warm rug over your legs shouting out to players, come on, you irons!

No, I'm glad you got it.

I don't mind telling you, it's a load off my mind knowing that when I go out,

you ain't going to have to be stuck in this room on your own.

Oh. What's going to happen then?

When you go out and I ain't going to have to be stuck in this room on my own?

You don't think I'm going to be able to wheel myself about in that thing, do

you? No.

Why not?

Because I'm not going to... I fit in that thing, trying to push those wheels

round. That's why not.

Because I'm not strong enough for one thing.

And another thing, you said you'd push me. You told everyone you'd push me.

I ain't said I won't, have I?

Well, get out then. Let me get in.

Because I only think of you, my dear, that's all.

Or me.

Make you more independent, wouldn't it? If you can get about on your own like in

that thing.

Oh, blimey.

I've seen people charging about in them things.

Seen them playing basketball, and I have.

All it needs is a little bit of effort, my dear, that's all.

God blimey, they've got their own Olympics to have you around, you kept.

Winning gold medals, they are, some of them.

Are you going to push me?

You won't try.

That's your trouble. You won't blimmin' try, will you?

If it was you who had to sit in this chair all crippled up, there'd be a

different tune you'd be playing then.

You wouldn't be talking about playing basketball, winning gold medals, would

you? Oh, no.

You'd expect me to push you.

If you couldn't walk, you'd have to sit crippled up in this chair.

Yeah, but it ain't me that's all crippled up and got to sit in that

dear. You's got to sit in that chair, innit?

Your legs have gone wonky, my dear, not mine.

Well, I like to think if it was me, he was in your condition.

That I would try and do something about it.

And not just sit there and give in to it.

It's no good looking at me like that, my dear.

It's not my fault that the good Lord has seen fit to turn you into a cripple.

Me?

Bloody thing.

I don't know why I damn it deserve this.

What? You, stuck in this thing.

from above.

Didn't say it was.

Well, you seem to be implying it.

No. All I said was... It's rheumatoid arthritis.

Yeah, well, it's rheumatoid.

A lot of people my age get it.

If it had been, it'd be you that would have got it. Yeah, but it ain't me

got it, is it? It's you that's got it. You got that brake on again?

No. You sure?

I mean, this thing's getting harder and harder to push it. You're going to have

to lose some weight, my dear.

You'll get used to it.

Once you get the knack.

Don't it require a bit of effort?

It is a punishment from above.

I'm beginning to believe that. You're right.

It's me.

It's me he's got his knife into, he's worked it out. What is the hardest

punishment?

Pushing his bloody feet or sitting in it.

All I meant was, if the almighty, if he has done this to you, well he probably

ain't done it to you because he don't like you.

No, he's always doing this sort of things to the ones he does like.

He's always been hard on his saints down here on earth. It's an old fact.

He does it to try him, you see, to put him to the test.

For something better, he's got up there for them in heaven. And then, when he

calls you,

he sticks you by his side, upon his right hand.

As an example to all them others who had it too easy down here.

I shouldn't think he'd make you suffer too long. Nah, he's not a hard man.

Once he sees you've had enough, once he thinks you've done enough penance, he'll

call you unto him. And then, ba -boom.

You'd laugh.

I'm dancing on your grave.

Anyhow, my legs will outlast your nipper.

Yeah, and I don't want to catch myself, neither.

Oh, dear, oh, Lord.

Look, will you leave that brake alone?

Leave that brake alone, I'll remove it. I'll remove that bloody brake, I will.

Go steady.

Take it easy. Take it easy? You're not making it any easier putting that bloody

brake on all the time.

And watch your language.

You're not at home now, you know.

You're in the street.

People can hear you.

Look, if you don't like the way I'm pushing in, you can... Take it easy.

Don't you conking out on me.

I'm young as I used to be, you know.

I know that, my dear.

I know that.

I'm not getting older by the minute pushing this bloody thing.

Well, put the brake.

Oh, dear, oh, Lord.

Isn't it fair, eh?

Isn't it bloody fair?

Here she comes, Zola Bud.

You ain't got enough wrong with you. One other ain't to go wrong with you.

Told you.

You shouldn't have to go dragging out to see that doctor. He's the one who

should come out and see you. You're the one who can't walk.

You're the cripple, not him.

Look, it's not our doctor I've got to see. I keep telling you.

It's a consultant.

Specialist up at the hospital.

He specialises in what I've got. Oh, yeah?

And what's that one specialising in? Ain't nothing, I suppose. Nothing we

to get anyway.

I mean, you go and see him, all he does is sling you over his shoulder.

Well, perhaps that's what he specialises in.

He believes in that. It's good for your spine, he says.

I had nothing wrong with my spine when I went to see him.

I had a cold.

I've got something wrong with my spine now, don't I?

I've got a pain in my spine now, since I see him.

I'm what he does. It straightens you out. He does it to everyone.

I didn't want no straightening out.

I was all right the way I was.

I just wanted something for me cold, that's all.

Anyway, I wouldn't like to ask the doctor to come round here.

I wouldn't like to ask anyone to come round here and take this place.

I feel too ashamed.

It's another thing.

You should have someone here to help.

You shouldn't have to go cooking and scrubbing and cleaning the condition

in.

Pippled up the way you are.

You could do more.

That's not the point. That's not the argument. They, the council, they should

send someone round here.

It's their job to provide that, not mine. It's not my job. I'm not a bloody

social worker.

I mean, where's your welfare state, eh?

That's what I'm on about. Where do they vanish to when you need them?

Oh, yeah.

You're paying for it, aren't you? You have to. See, I was against that from

beginning, you know that?

I would have sooner gone private, but no.

Oh, you ain't got no bleeding choice. You have to pay into that.

Oh, they said we've got a free health service for you, Mr Garne. It's only

to cost you X pounds per week.

What's X?

What's X?

I'll tell you what bloody X is.

X bloody Spencer, that's what X is.

That's what your free health service is. X bloody Spencer.

when you're paying in for it, aren't they? Quick enough grabbing the money

you then, but the minute it comes the time to give some of it back, they're

so bloody quick or keen then, are they? I tell you, if it was one of your city

companies, one of your private firms, one of your insurance friendlies done

that, done a bunk with the money, what you've paid in, they'd soon get their

collar felt. Don't you worry about that.

They'd soon, their bloody feet wouldn't touch the ground.

The bloody fraud's got to be on to them. But just because it's the government,

that can rob you blind again.

Well, they give me this chair.

Oh, yeah, they give you that chair.

They give you a bloody wheelchair.

They never give you no one to push it, did they?

Ah!

The nuggins push it!

Nuggins! I did a sounding, I need a bloody wheelchair soon, pushing you

in that thing.

I'm not a bloody horse to be put in a car at my time of life.

At my age, I should be having a rest.

Not becoming a beast of burden.

No consideration.

I'll be parking your front garden soon.

Because it is whatever time I want. Just cross the road and hurry up and be

safe, mate.

Shame to mine.

Take your hand off of that chair. Listen. Take your hand off of that

I don't want someone off the dole queue examining me.

It's up to me. That's where our doctor be on the bloody dole queue.

It's up to me. That's where they'd all be on the dole queue.

Oh, dear.

Can't smoke here. No smoking.

Worse than Nazi Germany here. Supposed to be a free country, innit?

It was till your Mrs Thatcher took over. Not my Mrs Thatcher. I never voted for

her. You voted for the Tories. So I might have, but I voted for the Tory

not for the Tory women.

It's a mistake putting a woman in charge, isn't it?

A woman shouldn't be in a parliament in the first place.

It's not a woman's job. Your woman's place is in the home.

In the home.

All right.

One or two of them in parliament in the old days was just for a laugh, wasn't

it?

Just for a giggle. And to hand out the tea and blankets during your all -night

sessions. Seriously.

role is not go meshing about in politics your woman's role is to be wife and

mother of your politician mother of a prime minister not

to be it herself wife and mother of man that's all we ask of it it should be

important enough role for any woman they shouldn't have to go worrying their

pretty lads about how the country's run it's none of their business be good at

housekeeping

That's all your economics, your woman has to know.

But your man, you see, he's got to go out and earn the money before she can

housekeep it. And that is your man's role.

To go out and earn the money for her.

Well, I haven't noticed you doing much of that.

holidays, is he? Your consultant.

I mean, is this the right day, is it? Yes.

I mean, don't they give you an appointment, like a time to see him?

They tell you a time to be here.

But is that the same time he gets here?

I mean, he is here, is he? That's turned up, is he?

There's open up shop, is he?

I don't know.

He might still be up near Harley Street with all his rich patients.

Well, them Harley Street doctors, they only come down here to practice on the

likes of us, my dear.

Well, it's no good looking like that. It's the truth I'm telling you. You've

heard the expression, to practice medicine.

We don't think them rich Harley Street patients let them doctors practice on

them, do you? No.

This is where they do their practicing, down here. On us. On your poor National

Health Service patients.

Like us. This is where they sharpen up their skills, my dear.

This is where they learn to use a knife.

I mean, let me ask you a question, see. Who was your first heart transplant

patient, eh? It wasn't one of your rich, high street patients, was it? Oh, no.

It was a poor Jewish one down in South Africa.

Migrant, probably just got off the boat with hardly enough lingo to know what

they was doing to him.

And look what he done, look what he done.

To bang the black heart into him.

A black man's heart.

About to fail, isn't it?

Because, you see, your Jews, other Jewish organs rejected it, didn't they?

Because it wasn't what your Jews called kosher, you see.

Anyway, even if he had lived, even if he had survived, what sort of life would

that be? A tap Africa with all your apartheid.

When a white man walked around with a black man's heart, he wouldn't even know

what toilet to use, would he?

They've got a bit better at it since then. I've had a lot of practice out

in South Africa where your life is cheap. I'll tell you one thing.

When they've perfected it, as soon as they've made that operation foolproof,

wants to know...

Poor people getting heart transplants then, my dear Bill. All your rich

millionaires getting it then. You mark my words.

Will you get me a cup of tea?

I suppose I'll have to queue up for that, won't I?

Well, it won't hurt you, will it? Not doing anything else.

Right, Samba? Yeah.

I was thinking.

Something new for you, isn't it?

No, I was thinking... So you said.

In a hundred years or more from now, there'll be new people here.

Why, do you think we'll have to wait that long?

In the world I'm talking about, you silly white puddin', in this world!

Well, you've got a point, though, what you're saying about all this waiting.

Well, it all be gone before that.

Oh, I'll be gone soon. That consultant done put his finger out.

I was thinking, you know, like watching all them people come in here, all the

sick and the lame.

It made me think, no matter what them doctors do to them, no matter how clever

they become,

we've still all got to go, haven't we?

All that money spent... on keeping people alive, wasted.

Because we've all still got a goal, haven't we? I mean, even them, even the

doctors themselves, because in 100 years or more, none of us who's here now will

be here then.

We'll all be gone.

Well, it would be stranger if we wasn't.

How important you are, see, how rich, how famous.

We'll be gone.

Margaret Thatcher.

Boy George.

Half a scalpel.

Even your Terry Wogan.

All got to go.

Makes you think, doesn't it?

Seems to have made you think.

I thought you knew that.

I thought you knew that you'd have to go someday.

Full of new people. And no one that we know will be here.

There's not many here now that I know.

Look on the bright side.

All right, so you've lost the use of your legs.

Could be worse. You've still got your arms.

You ain't lost the use of them yet, have you? Hey, my dear, you've still got all

your marbles.

Well.

They don't know where they are, so some of them don't even know who they are.

Now, listen, you want to cheer up, sit there moping about, I tell you, I'll win

the pools, my dear, I'll take you to Lourdes.

If you win the pools.

Anyway, that's only for Catholics, isn't it? No, if you've got the money, my

dear, them Catholics ain't going to turn away the business, are they?

Anyway, how do you tell a Catholic, eh?

I mean, you could pass for Catholic easy. All you've got to do is...

Get some of them beads that they pray on, go down that church of theirs, learn

some of the lingo, light a few candles, ask King, Queen, Jack, ba -boom!

Are you the faster couplet as anyone?

No, it's not true. Oh, we're in the pools to get the money. Stay off the

for you.

No more hanging about these places.

You know a thing, another thing about your lords, see, we'd get a bit of a

return lock on our money.

You know, bring back all the duty threes.

I've heard tales about your lords.

Amazing. People worse crippled up than what you are. Worse than any of this lot

here. To walk into that water, holy water, and to come out and throw away

crutches, leave the wheelchairs there.

Of course, we wouldn't leave our wheelchair there. We'd bring the duty

in that, wouldn't we?

You know, it's a wonder to me they don't put your lords on your national health.

No, of course, I mean, the doctors would be against that, wouldn't they? That's

the reason. You put your lawyers and your national health, they'd all be out

a job, wouldn't they?

I don't know why you've got this terrible down on doctors all of a

got no down on them. Some is all right, some is honest enough. I just think it's

bloody daft to let doctors and nurses build up a bloody good business out of

being ill.

It's daft, isn't it? Let them make handsome profit out of... Cutting your

off or cutting your insides out?

No -one's cutting my legs off. Of course they aren't. No -one's going to cut

your legs off, my dear. You're too poor. There's not enough profit out of

cutting your legs off.

No, doctors are dedicated.

Dedicated. They're like vicars and priests.

Talking about. They do what they have to do because it's good for us. They don't

all think like you.

Doctors are the same as everybody else, my dear.

They're in it for what they can get out of it.

You don't think I undertake a crime when you die, do you?

Of course he doesn't. He's the only one laughing, cos he's earning it.

You don't think I'm the type to dig holes for the love of it and bury you

the love of it, do you?

Some would dig holes and bury you for the love of it.

No, it... You'll suit on to the doctor if there's anything wrong with you. On

him? Good blimey, he's hardly ever there. It'd be easier to get in to see

than get in to see him.

You can't expect to see him at the drop of a hat.

You're supposed to make an appointment to see him. Make appointment? That would

be bloody daft. How can I make an appointment?

I don't know when I'm going to be ill, do I?

What am I supposed to do? Go down to Fortune and find out when I'm going to

ill? Oh, Doc, can I have an appointment, please? I think I'm going to have a flu

on Tuesday.

You're always phoning and complaining that you're ill.

Look, the trouble with your doctors, my dear, is the government paying them

their money up front. What the government ought to do is only pay them

money when his patient is sick.

And only then, if he does his job properly and gets him well again. And if

dies, nothing. Don't give him nothing.

He'll soon come running in.

He'll soon come running when you ring him up. Better still, what the

ought to do is only pay your doctors when his patient is fit and healthy.

And if he gets sick, stop it out of his wages.

He'd soon want to see you then.

You wouldn't have to bother making appointments with him then. He'd be

your house all day long, knocking on the front door. Good morning, Mr Garnet.

Anything I can do for you? Nothing I can do for you today is there. One sneeze

and you'll soon find your hospital bed then, I tell you.

But I think the National Health Service is a good thing. Good thing?

Yeah. Don't know where I'd be now without it. National Health Service? A

thing? What are you talking about?

You can't even get to Lourdes on it.

I don't know that I want to go to Lourdes.

Afraid I don't believe in miracles anymore.

Well, you please yourself.

I'll tell you one thing, it'd be a bloody miracle if any of this lot get to

a doctor today.

Bloody hells, we've been here hours!

© transcript Emily Beynon