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1
00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:15,082
Where am I?
2
00:02:15,458 --> 00:02:17,790
In the village.
3
00:02:18,250 --> 00:02:20,207
What do you want?
4
00:02:20,291 --> 00:02:21,957
Information.
5
00:02:22,291 --> 00:02:24,290
Whose side are you on?
6
00:02:24,375 --> 00:02:26,790
That would be telling.
7
00:02:26,875 --> 00:02:29,915
We want information...
8
00:02:30,958 --> 00:02:32,707
Information...
9
00:02:33,333 --> 00:02:35,457
Information.
10
00:02:35,541 --> 00:02:37,499
You won't get it.
11
00:02:40,041 --> 00:02:43,707
By hook or by crook...
...we will.
12
00:02:45,750 --> 00:02:47,457
Who are you?
13
00:02:47,500 --> 00:02:49,415
The new Number Two.
14
00:02:49,500 --> 00:02:51,665
Who is Number One?
15
00:02:52,250 --> 00:02:54,874
You are Number Six.
16
00:02:56,875 --> 00:03:00,457
I am not a number.
I am a free man!
17
00:05:44,250 --> 00:05:48,165
- Busy, Potter?
- It's our form of Siberia.
18
00:05:48,250 --> 00:05:52,707
- What was the Colonel up to?
- Dr Schnipps, crazy scientist.
19
00:05:52,791 --> 00:05:55,207
He's got a rocket to destroy London.
20
00:05:55,291 --> 00:05:57,915
- Where?
- I don't know.
21
00:05:57,958 --> 00:05:59,915
Excuse me.
22
00:06:00,208 --> 00:06:02,290
Ridiculous.
23
00:06:07,625 --> 00:06:10,874
- Yes.
- Where do I start?
24
00:06:11,166 --> 00:06:15,290
Go to Magnum record shop, booth
seven. The Chief will speak to you.
25
00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:17,332
Chin up, Potter.
26
00:06:17,416 --> 00:06:19,124
It was so damned unsporting.
27
00:06:19,250 --> 00:06:22,665
It wasn't cricket.
Keep the change.
28
00:07:09,333 --> 00:07:13,665
Mission -
find and destroy Schnipp's rocket,
29
00:07:13,791 --> 00:07:18,749
but I can't help much -
the opposition is one step ahead.
30
00:07:18,833 --> 00:07:20,790
- Thanks!
- What was that?
31
00:07:20,875 --> 00:07:24,832
- Nothing.
- Take over from the Colonel.
32
00:09:22,958 --> 00:09:26,415
- The usual, sir?
- Please, Doris.
33
00:09:40,875 --> 00:09:42,457
Thank you.
34
00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:39,207
- Same again, sir?
- No. One of those is quite enough.
35
00:10:39,291 --> 00:10:40,957
Brandy.
36
00:10:47,416 --> 00:10:50,165
Whisky, vodka, Drambuie.
37
00:10:57,083 --> 00:11:00,457
Tia Maria, Cointreau, Grand Marnier.
38
00:11:22,958 --> 00:11:26,040
Sir, you'll make yourself sick.
39
00:13:24,750 --> 00:13:26,082
What a brave loser!
40
00:13:26,166 --> 00:13:30,040
One of the many in this year's heavy
weight title, ladies and gentlemen.
41
00:13:30,125 --> 00:13:35,082
Those are the sort of fights
you don't see in the big clubs.
42
00:13:35,500 --> 00:13:40,790
And now, for the first time
ever in this country,
43
00:13:40,875 --> 00:13:46,249
at 2 1 0lbs, the Polish giant,
Killer Karminski!
44
00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:57,999
Let's hear it for the gallant
opponent, who will go three rounds
45
00:13:58,041 --> 00:14:02,457
with the Killer, a man of mystery,
in the front row,
46
00:14:02,541 --> 00:14:04,874
Mr X!
47
00:14:22,166 --> 00:14:25,540
Good luck, young man.
48
00:14:39,750 --> 00:14:41,832
Killer Karminski!
49
00:14:44,458 --> 00:14:46,540
Mr X!
50
00:14:50,083 --> 00:14:53,540
I want a good clean fight.
No kicking, butting or gouging,
51
00:14:53,625 --> 00:14:56,790
except in moderation.
52
00:14:56,875 --> 00:15:00,332
May the best man win.
Back to your corners.
53
00:15:04,583 --> 00:15:07,457
Seconds out, round one!
54
00:15:11,791 --> 00:15:16,999
Take it easy, me face is me fortune.
You might knock it back into shape.
55
00:15:17,875 --> 00:15:19,207
Break!
56
00:15:25,500 --> 00:15:28,374
Go to the tunnel of love.
57
00:15:28,458 --> 00:15:31,540
- The what?
- The tunnel of love.
58
00:15:36,666 --> 00:15:40,415
Who... gave... you... the... message?
59
00:15:40,500 --> 00:15:41,915
A lady.
60
00:15:42,083 --> 00:15:44,124
- Who?
- I don't know.
61
00:15:44,208 --> 00:15:48,249
- Who was she?
- Didn't I tell ya? I don't know!
62
00:15:52,458 --> 00:15:54,540
The tunnel of love.
63
00:16:29,125 --> 00:16:33,540
Hello.
Don't turn round, you're covered.
64
00:16:33,666 --> 00:16:36,249
The tunnel of love is fitting
65
00:16:36,333 --> 00:16:39,999
because I'm beginning
to love you in my way.
66
00:16:40,041 --> 00:16:43,249
I've been looking
for a worthy opponent
67
00:16:43,333 --> 00:16:47,332
and you've passed
my first tests brilliantly.
68
00:16:47,541 --> 00:16:51,999
You will be hearing from me again.
Auf Wiedersehen!
69
00:19:40,791 --> 00:19:42,957
What's your game, Sherlock?
70
00:19:42,958 --> 00:19:47,082
I'll spread your nose
all over your face.
71
00:19:47,166 --> 00:19:53,124
I'll tear off your leg and beat you
over the head with it.
72
00:21:20,458 --> 00:21:22,874
I love you madly.
73
00:21:24,625 --> 00:21:28,624
I love the way your hair curls
on the back of your neck.
74
00:21:28,708 --> 00:21:31,915
You'll make a beautiful corpse.
75
00:21:32,833 --> 00:21:38,665
I'm going to do you the honour
of letting you die... superbly.
76
00:22:13,625 --> 00:22:18,207
But not yet, darling.
There's more fun to come.
77
00:23:51,375 --> 00:23:54,290
I'm glad you came.
78
00:23:54,958 --> 00:23:58,499
This is to be our love tryst.
79
00:24:00,958 --> 00:24:06,832
You may not see my face,
but you may know my name.
80
00:24:09,833 --> 00:24:12,332
My name... is Death.
81
00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:27,249
I'm sorry my father
couldn't be here to greet you.
82
00:24:27,333 --> 00:24:29,999
He's busy with his rocket.
83
00:24:30,083 --> 00:24:34,374
Besides, he didn't wish
to play gooseberry.
84
00:24:34,833 --> 00:24:39,957
You are a born survivor,
I am a born killer.
85
00:24:40,083 --> 00:24:43,290
We were made for each other,
86
00:24:43,375 --> 00:24:46,040
but I fear this is
where it must end .
87
00:24:46,125 --> 00:24:49,165
Your reflexes can't
save you now.
88
00:24:49,250 --> 00:24:54,207
It will come suddenly,
when your luck runs out...
89
00:24:54,958 --> 00:24:56,624
...with my love.
90
00:24:56,708 --> 00:25:00,415
Come, come inside, my darling.
91
00:25:29,333 --> 00:25:32,957
Is your heart pounding?
Your hands shaking?
92
00:25:33,083 --> 00:25:35,415
That's love, my darling.
93
00:25:35,458 --> 00:25:39,790
My father was a great man, but the
war ended before he was recognised .
94
00:25:39,916 --> 00:25:43,582
But when London lies in ruins,
he will be a god .
95
00:25:59,625 --> 00:26:01,790
Nice of you to drop in.
96
00:26:01,875 --> 00:26:04,874
I can see you're having
a swinging time.
97
00:26:04,958 --> 00:26:07,749
But that's not quite
what I had in mind .
98
00:26:07,833 --> 00:26:10,499
Perhaps this will help.
99
00:26:10,583 --> 00:26:13,165
You'll soon get the point.
100
00:26:13,250 --> 00:26:16,790
Incidentally, they're electrified.
101
00:26:52,583 --> 00:26:54,499
Ingenious.
102
00:26:54,750 --> 00:26:57,749
Nobody's ever
thought of that before.
103
00:26:57,833 --> 00:27:02,082
You're really the most
entertaining lover I've ever had.
104
00:27:03,583 --> 00:27:06,415
That was ill-mannered
and dangerous.
105
00:27:06,500 --> 00:27:10,665
I might not have been able
to warn you the floor is mined -
106
00:27:10,708 --> 00:27:15,457
small, sensitive, and quite deadly.
107
00:27:25,500 --> 00:27:31,415
Oh, I almost forgot, they will
all explode anyway in 90 seconds.
108
00:27:37,750 --> 00:27:42,040
That's the hot line,
or had you noticed?
109
00:27:48,208 --> 00:27:53,124
On from the butcher's and baker's
into the candlestick maker's,
110
00:27:53,375 --> 00:27:57,374
only he never made candles
like these.
111
00:27:58,041 --> 00:28:02,540
They have a cyanide derivative
mixed with wax.
112
00:28:02,625 --> 00:28:05,749
As the wax burns,
it gives off cyanide.
113
00:28:05,833 --> 00:28:10,249
Every candle
is breathing poison into the air.
114
00:28:15,125 --> 00:28:18,499
I do so believe in double
glazing, don't you?
115
00:28:18,583 --> 00:28:20,707
It keeps out the noise.
116
00:28:20,833 --> 00:28:23,832
Of course,
it does keep out the air, too.
117
00:28:24,541 --> 00:28:29,540
A word of advice: if the candles
are blown out, they explode.
118
00:28:50,875 --> 00:28:53,832
And that's only
one of the little ones!
119
00:28:57,291 --> 00:28:59,832
I warned you your luck
would run out.
120
00:28:59,916 --> 00:29:03,582
I'm glad it's to be this way.
121
00:29:03,666 --> 00:29:06,749
I hate quick farewells, don't you?
122
00:29:27,166 --> 00:29:28,832
Interesting.
123
00:29:28,916 --> 00:29:34,332
Mice get just as irrational
when they're about to die.
124
00:29:41,958 --> 00:29:48,207
Here, when a great man was dying,
they sounded the death knell.
125
00:29:48,375 --> 00:29:51,332
I think that was a charming idea.
126
00:30:09,041 --> 00:30:13,832
All right, darling, you win.
I've just realised something.
127
00:30:13,958 --> 00:30:17,540
I don't want to kill you -
you're the best.
128
00:30:17,625 --> 00:30:22,332
If I kill you, what would be left?
Life would be a bore.
129
00:30:22,416 --> 00:30:25,665
Why don't you join us?
130
00:30:25,666 --> 00:30:28,457
We could have
a wonderful life together.
131
00:30:28,541 --> 00:30:31,999
You would be
a constant challenge to me.
132
00:30:35,666 --> 00:30:39,999
Join me in the bell tower.
What do you say, darling?
133
00:30:40,083 --> 00:30:43,374
Don't let pride stand in your way.
134
00:31:49,708 --> 00:31:58,999
Whee!
135
00:32:16,291 --> 00:32:18,040
Bye, bye, lover.
136
00:36:52,375 --> 00:36:57,707
From glen to glen
and o'er the mountain side
137
00:36:57,791 --> 00:37:02,082
The summer's gone
and all the roses...
138
00:37:02,166 --> 00:37:07,082
'Tis you, 'tis you
must bide and I must go
139
00:37:07,500 --> 00:37:12,624
But come ye back
when summer's in the meadow...
140
00:37:44,250 --> 00:37:47,290
Everybody's doing it now, you see.
141
00:37:50,208 --> 00:37:52,457
You're quite sure you killed him?
142
00:37:52,541 --> 00:37:55,374
Father, who taught me?
143
00:37:55,916 --> 00:37:58,665
You're a girl after my own heart.
144
00:37:59,375 --> 00:38:02,957
If only your mother could see you.
145
00:38:07,833 --> 00:38:09,749
Good old Josephine.
146
00:38:10,041 --> 00:38:12,415
Tell me again
about her last cavalry charge.
147
00:38:12,500 --> 00:38:16,665
Not now, child.
We have work to do.
148
00:38:17,833 --> 00:38:19,415
Gentlemen!
149
00:38:24,083 --> 00:38:27,332
Yes, all right. That's very good.
150
00:38:35,375 --> 00:38:41,457
In one hour's time,
London will lie entirely in ruins.
151
00:39:29,916 --> 00:39:34,624
No more Trafalgar Square -
it will be Napoleon's Square.
152
00:39:34,708 --> 00:39:38,082
Nelson's Column
will be Napoleon's Column.
153
00:39:38,833 --> 00:39:43,207
Then my little girl here
will take over Bond Street.
154
00:39:45,583 --> 00:39:49,624
And you, merry lads, can have...
155
00:39:51,541 --> 00:39:53,374
Chelsea Barracks.
156
00:39:56,541 --> 00:40:01,374
Ungrateful swine... And then we will
be taking over the entire regions.
157
00:40:01,458 --> 00:40:04,207
- The Scottish Marshal here?
- Present.
158
00:40:06,500 --> 00:40:09,457
- Are you keen on soccer?
- Aye, sir.
159
00:40:09,708 --> 00:40:13,124
- Like Wembley Stadium?
- Aye, I would.
160
00:40:13,666 --> 00:40:15,999
It's yours. Welsh Marshal...
161
00:40:16,041 --> 00:40:20,249
What a great day
for the Nationalists.
162
00:40:20,333 --> 00:40:22,540
Thank you, Jones. Irish?
163
00:40:22,625 --> 00:40:24,999
He's gone to the armoury.
164
00:40:25,083 --> 00:40:29,457
Blast! What does he do down there?
165
00:41:44,041 --> 00:41:47,207
The countdown has now started.
166
00:41:48,250 --> 00:41:49,582
Hmm?
167
00:41:53,500 --> 00:41:56,082
Yes, of course. Thank you.
168
00:41:56,708 --> 00:42:01,457
As I was saying, the countdown
has already started.
169
00:42:02,166 --> 00:42:07,290
In a few minutes, we transfer
to the speedboat for the final phase.
170
00:42:08,333 --> 00:42:10,582
O'Rourke will...
171
00:42:10,958 --> 00:42:15,499
Where is Marshal O'Rourke?
Find him at once. All of you!
172
00:42:28,000 --> 00:42:32,624
Oh... It's Waterloo all over again.
173
00:42:33,666 --> 00:42:36,165
He must’ve
come through here.
174
00:42:42,083 --> 00:42:44,040
- Is O'Rourke anywhere?
- No.
175
00:42:44,125 --> 00:42:46,499
- He must've come through here.
- I haven't seen him.
176
00:42:46,583 --> 00:42:48,582
- What's going on here?
- I dunno.
177
00:42:53,750 --> 00:42:55,957
Excuse me a minute.
178
00:43:21,500 --> 00:43:24,165
There he is.
Take your firing positions.
179
00:43:26,958 --> 00:43:28,207
Fire!
180
00:43:42,750 --> 00:43:45,707
This one won't backfire, darling.
181
00:43:55,416 --> 00:43:58,540
This climbing rope
holds an elephant.
182
00:43:58,666 --> 00:44:00,957
I'll remember that the next time
I go climbing with one.
183
00:44:01,041 --> 00:44:03,874
There won't be a next time, darling.
184
00:44:03,958 --> 00:44:07,957
Your death will be original -
on a rocket ride.
185
00:44:08,041 --> 00:44:10,457
Where is the rocket?
186
00:44:10,500 --> 00:44:12,874
It is here. All around you.
187
00:44:12,958 --> 00:44:16,207
The lighthouse itself is the rocket.
188
00:44:17,833 --> 00:44:24,790
You've guessed. You're not
the Duke of Wellington, are you?
189
00:44:26,208 --> 00:44:28,915
I expect you're surprised
to meet me.
190
00:44:29,000 --> 00:44:31,957
Aren't I an extraordinary man?
191
00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:33,624
Crazy.
192
00:44:34,083 --> 00:44:36,540
This is the nose cone.
193
00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:41,249
When the rocket reaches London,
you'll be the first to know.
194
00:44:41,333 --> 00:44:44,540
- Won't that be exciting?
- I'll go to pieces.
195
00:44:47,083 --> 00:44:50,290
It is time to board the boat.
196
00:44:51,666 --> 00:44:54,040
The flight pattern is set.
197
00:44:54,125 --> 00:45:00,249
All that remains is to fire
the lighthouse when we get to sea.
198
00:45:05,333 --> 00:45:09,499
Bon voyage, darling.
Think of me when you hit town.
199
00:45:25,666 --> 00:45:27,457
Careful, careful.
200
00:45:29,958 --> 00:45:32,332
They're my records, you know.
201
00:45:42,875 --> 00:45:44,457
That'll do.
202
00:45:50,500 --> 00:45:54,124
Please hurry,
it's three minutes to blast-off.
203
00:45:54,916 --> 00:45:58,249
I must have my papers,
these are the history.
204
00:46:53,375 --> 00:46:56,957
I've always taught you
to be calm and methodical.
205
00:47:24,083 --> 00:47:26,332
- Oh...
- What is it?
206
00:47:26,625 --> 00:47:29,707
- I forgot to turn the gas off.
- Oh, Father.
207
00:47:30,166 --> 00:47:32,207
Look! Stop him!
208
00:47:34,416 --> 00:47:36,457
Not those, these.
209
00:47:36,541 --> 00:47:37,957
Oh, yes.
210
00:48:00,666 --> 00:48:06,832
And that is how I saved London
from the mad scientist.
211
00:48:08,375 --> 00:48:11,624
- Oh, one more, please.
- No more tonight.
212
00:48:11,708 --> 00:48:14,165
It's past bedtime. Come on.
213
00:48:14,208 --> 00:48:17,957
- There's a good girl.
- You will come tomorrow, please.
214
00:48:18,041 --> 00:48:21,457
- We'll see.
- Promise. He will come...
215
00:48:21,541 --> 00:48:23,499
Tomorrow, he will come.
216
00:48:25,416 --> 00:48:28,082
- I want to hear more.
- Shh!
217
00:48:29,625 --> 00:48:32,624
Sleep. I'll come tomorrow.
218
00:48:35,125 --> 00:48:39,665
I don't think I have any
other important appointments.
219
00:48:46,416 --> 00:48:49,332
He might drop his guard
with children...
220
00:48:52,416 --> 00:48:56,582
- He might give something away.
- It was worth a try, Number Two.
221
00:48:56,666 --> 00:48:58,832
He told them a...
222
00:49:01,833 --> 00:49:05,957
He told them a blessed fairy tale.
223
00:49:06,833 --> 00:49:10,999
He wouldn't drop his guard
with his own grandmother!
224
00:49:12,625 --> 00:49:14,749
Good night, children...
225
00:49:18,166 --> 00:49:20,332
Everywhere.
16865
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