Original subtitles

(triumphant music)

(upbeat music)

(alarm beeping)

(upbeat music)

- Tony, wake up.

(laughs)

(upbeat music)

(laughs)

(upbeat music)

- [Doris] Breakfast is ready.

- Coming.

(upbeat music)

(telephone ringing)

(peaceful music)

(telephone ringing)

(peaceful music)

(telephone ringing)

(car engine roaring)

(beep)

- [Lisa] Hey Tony, it's Lisa.

You remember me?

(laughs) Just kidding.

I'm gonna be there early in the morning tomorrow, so, yeah.

I can't believe it's been 10 years.

It's crazy.

I can't wait to see you.

I don't really know why I'm calling,

but just wanna let you know.

Okay, I'll see you soon, bye.

(upbeat music)

- [Rachel] Do you have your tooth brush?

- [Lisa] Yeah.

- [Rachel] Don't let your dad feed you

whatever he wants, okay?

- Yeah.

- [Rachel] Don't call so much, I know you like to call.

- [Lisa] Sure.

- I'm gonna be there early on Sunday,

so do not make me wait, okay?

- I got it.

- Excuse me?

- I got it.

- Don't talk to me like that.

- What?

Don't, yes, I'm sorry, I got it.

- Okay, I love you.

- I know.

(upbeat music)

- Give your brother a big squeeze for me, okay?

- Wait, you're not gonna come in?

- No, goddammit Lisa, I've gotta catch

a fucking flight, okay?

Shit.

Go, I gotta get off, did you hear me?

- Yes, see.

- Get out, I gotta go.

(bag thudding)

- Now look.

Goddammit Lisa, we just got that.

- It is grandma's.

- Love you.

(car engine revving)

(bag dragging)

(door bell ringing)

(spoon stirring)

- Lisa, I'm so glad to finally meet you.

- Yeah.

- I'm really excited about us getting to know each other.

Your dad tells me all sorts of things about you.

(laughs)

And of course I know about you already mister.

I wash your sheets.

- That's my boy.

- Oh, I hope you don't mind sharing a room.

- For God's sakes, you kids used to bathe together.

- [Tony] Yeah, that was fun.

- We're making the spare room,

into a beautiful sitting room.

- For sitting?

- Yes.

- What else?

- That's it.

- That's it?

- Yes (laughs)

- Lisa, I know this is new for you,

but I want you to know, Doris is here to stay.

You're gonna fall in love with her, just like I have.

- Aaw.

- Doris actually cooks.

(laughs)

- How did you guys meet?

(chuckles)

- Well, I was at a gas station--

- Your mother had just sent me divorce papers.

- And I saw this pathetic looking man,

just leaning on the counter.

- That was me.

- And I leaned in and I said,

- "I like your look." (laughs) - "I like your look."

She took me to a hotel.

- [Doris] We drank and drank.

- And she talked me through everything.

- I had just finished an online course, in psychology.

- Finally felt like I could let everything out,

without feeling judged.

- And we've been going strong ever since.

- She's the one kids.

- Wow, well, I'm happy for you guys.

(laughs)

- Oh honey, I'm running so late.

- Oh.

- Anything?

- Sharp as a rock.

- Now I've got a rock for you (mumbles)

(both giggling)

- Bye dad.

- It's Frank.

(gobbles)

(feet stomping)

(shrugs)

(peaceful music)

(sprinkler sputtering)

(peaceful music)

(air whooshing)

(crunching)

(trash bumping)

(gasping)

- Goddammit, don't,

that's-- - It's all about

the follow through.

- You sound just like Katie.

- Oh yeah?

- Yeah. - She wasn't saying

that last night, when I was, oh, oh yeah.

- That is my girlfriend, - Oh you like that?

- Asshole.

- Uh, you like this dick? - Okay, you know she wouldn't

do that, she's a good girl, she's fucking good.

She wouldn't suck that trashy-ass of dick.

- Oh yeah? - Yeah.

- You're saying that now,

but she recycled my cum last night.

(bumps) - What the fuck?

(door bell ringing)

- Hello, welcome to Speedway Market.

Don't touch my dick, touch your dick.

It's in there.

(laughs)

- You know, they say, raisins are an aphrodisiac.

- They do?

- No.

(laughs)

- Chocolate is, though.

- (sighs) I hate chocolate.

- Oh.

(gentle music)

Remember that time we broke into mom's Halloween candy,

and she made you eat the whole bag?

- Yeah.

- Yeah, that was funny.

- Thanks.

(drink squirting)

- Oh ah, got a little something.

- What is it?

- I think it's just bike grease, got it.

- Thanks.

- Anything for the pretty lady.

(peaceful music)

- Hi.

- Hey.

(papers rustling)

- That's $7.85.

- Keep the change.

- I can't, it messes up the drawer.

- Just keep it.

- But it messes up the drawer.

(peaceful music)

- Okay.

(paper rustling)

(shoes click-clacking)

(door alarm beeping)

- I could have used that.

- What the fuck, it's just $2, what's the big deal?

- Yeah? - Yeah.

- Katie only takes cash (laughs)

Oh yeah, like you gonna - (mumbles)

get upset?

(laughs)

(both grunting)

- Don't fall.

- Stop, that's cheating.

- Don't fall.

(body thudding)

(laughs)

(peaceful music)

- [Lisa] Hey.

- [Tony] What?

- Chicken butt.

(snorts)

- Nice.

(laughs)

- Mom said hi.

- Hi.

- You should tell her that.

- I would, if I even knew what she looked like anymore.

- Oh, come on.

(laughs)

(chess piece clicking)

- Checkmate.

- That's not what that means (laughs)

I wish you'd visit.

(peaceful music)

You look different.

- What?

- I don't know.

- Could it be my charming good looks?

Or my sensitive eyes?

Or my ability to chug a 44?

- Do it.

(laughs) (slurping)

Oh no, you're not gonna...

No you can't.

(cup clacking)

(belching)

(laughs)

(bright upbeat music)

- [Woman] Driving in the (mumbles) road together, is great.

But I think women would agree,

getting home to cuddle up with their men, is nice too.

But here's the thing, about half of men over 40,

have some degree of erectile dysfunction.

- [Man] Ask your doctor if your heart

is healthy enough for sex.

Do you want to take Viagra,

if you take nitrates for chest pain.

- My name's Lisa, and I got back.

- My name is Tony, and I got back.

- Prove it.

- Pre-sale. - Pre-sale.

♪ Stop ♪

(indistinct)

♪ Just a make believe world ♪

♪ That you once shared with me ♪

♪ Shared with me ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ All the plans that we made ♪

(upbeat music)

(door slams shut)

♪ Don't you ask (indistinct) ♪

- How are you feeling?

- The toilet looks like I pissed blue ink.

(laughs)

- I lied, you don't look different.

(sighs)

You look the same, the same as always.

Would you wanna watch something?

- Yeah.

(feet click-clacking)

(TV switch clicking)

(solemn music)

(indistinct)

(bed creaking)

(light switching off)

(indistinct)

I'm really glad you're here.

- Love you, Tony.

(tense music)

(bed squeaking)

(peaceful music)

(knuckles popping)

(snorts)

(knuckles popping)

(peaceful music)

(moans)

- Tony.

(metal clanking)

- Uh-huh?

- Are you awake?

- No, I was sleeping.

- I just heard a sound.

- Oh, that's weird.

- Did you hear that?

- [Tony] No.

- Was that you?

- No you're hearing things.

(metal clanking)

- Okay, good night.

Love you.

- Yeah, love you too.

(leaves ruffling)

(birds chirping)

(telephone ringing)

- Hey, I'm not here, you know what they say,

a bird's gotta fly and this time it's to Cancun, baby.

I probably won't get back to you,

'cause I'm having the time of my life, woo.

- Hey Pitches.

- Oh, hey dad.

(giggles)

- Call me Frank.

(cup clinking)

Want a peach?

- No, I'm okay.

- I'm gonna get you one anyways.

So, shouldn't you be in school, or something?

- It's summer.

- Right.

You need tampons or anything?

- No, I'm okay.

- You're sure?

Doris has a butt ton.

- I'm set.

- Seriously, that girl bleeds

like she's been mauled by a bear.

- Jeez.

- Too bad, I'm the bear.

(sniffles)

Are you having a sex, or anything?

- No, I would never.

- Oh great, great, that's good.

Do you like your room?

Yeah, it's fun having a roomie.

- Especially a roomie you can't have sex with.

- Yeah.

- Hey, it's really important to me,

that you and Doris get along.

She's new to the whole stepmom thing.

- Yeah, of course, she seems nice.

- Oh God, yes.

Nice in so many ways.

(munches)

- You seem happy, dad.

- Please call me Frank.

- Why?

- Doris calls me dad in the bedroom.

- You mean, daddy?

- No, I mean dad.

- Oh.

- So, it's really kind of weird when you guys say it.

- Got it.

(peaceful music)

(hands rubbing)

(peaceful music)

(door opening)

- (gasps) Oops, sorry.

(laughs)

- Oh, hey Lisa, no, no, no problem, come in.

- Are you sure?

- Yeah, yeah is everything okay?

- Yeah, I just... I have to.

- Oh, okay.

- Yeah.

(water splashing)

(water gurgling)

(hums)

(tinkles)

(water gurgling)

(toilet flushing)

(water splashing)

- Ooh, ah.

What I miss?

- Just a perfectly normal pee.

How's the swimming?

- Yeah, exactly how it looks.

- Wanna try?

- Sure, that wouldn't be weird?

- No, shower rules.

(water plopping)

(laughs)

- This is nice, warm.

- Yeah.

- You come here often?

(laughs)

- Not enough.

- Me either.

- Wash, and wash, and wash.

- [Rachel] I know what you're doing at work.

- [Frank] Oh, God, I do not need this bullshit again.

- [Rachel] Whenever you fucking flirt

in front of me all the time,

I know what you do when you're by yourself.

- [Frank] Oh you know what?

- Hey, there's something on your face.

(spraying)

(shouting)

(laughs)

- [Tony] You're gonna ruin the cupcakes.

- No.

(metal dish clanking)

(laughs)

- [Rachel] What are you guys doing?

- Nothing.

- Clean yourselves up for God's sake,

and get ready for dinner,

and do not expect dessert.

- Yes, ma'am.

- [Rachel] Don't call me ma'am.

- Yes mommy.

(shoes thumping)

- [Rachel] Oh, crazy, let's do that.

Let's do that, call me crazy. - [Frank] Yeah.

You know what, you're crazy. - Hey.

You're sweet. - [Rachel] Don't call

me crazy.

- [Frank] Great, you're insane.

(laughs)

(water trickling)

(hums)

♪ I'm not (mumbles) of the love we once shared ♪

♪ I wonder if yours are real ♪

♪ Or we just playing ♪

♪ There's no one else there ♪

- Morning Doris.

- Oh fuck.

Oh, oh my God, you are startling.

Good morning (laughs)

- Sorry.

- Yeah, eat (laughs) you hungry?

- Yeah.

- Good.

(exhales)

So, you look nice, what are you up to today?

- Just going to Tony's friend's house.

- Fun.

- Mm-hmm, yeah.

(exhales)

(giggles)

- Sometimes, I eat to fill a void.

You ever do that?

- Maybe.

- I like it, the way it feels when my tummy gets hard.

(exhales)

- Yeah?

- Yeah, it's filling.

- Yeah, I know what you mean.

- Your dad really likes you here.

And Tony, I know loves it.

- Yeah, well, I miss them too.

- You should move in with us, your junior year.

- Oh I would, but that would mean my mom would be alone,

and I should just visit more.

- I know she doesn't make it easy.

- She's just going through a lot of stuff.

- Yeah, well.

- But you're great.

I mean, I know I just met you, but Frank seems really happy.

- I love making him happy.

- That's great.

My mom would hate, if she saw what I've been eating.

- Well eat up honey, men love something to grab onto.

(laughs)

- These cinnamon rolls are really good.

Did you put something else in it?

- Sugar, a lot of it.

(upbeat music)

♪ My heart follows no direction ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah ♪

♪ It's desires for your affection ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah ♪

♪ And their lives will never be down hell-bent ♪

♪ As we take this man's deathly memory, ah ♪

(upbeat music)

♪ Yeah, we're back with another one ♪

♪ Jumbo gonna take you down ♪

(upbeat music)

♪ Woo take that guitar ♪

♪ I'm Asel Morgen ♪

♪ Oh, now that's real, that's real ♪

(hand thumping)

♪ We're gonna have a little excitement ♪

♪ A little excitement, right here ♪

- Hey Tony.

- Hi.

- Hey, will you come to the kitchen with me?

- Why?

- I have a question about the look of the chicken?

- Ask Chad, he's the one who goes to culinary school.

(lips smacking)

- He's busy, let's go, come on.

Come on, follow me, follow me.

(lips smacking)

(upbeat music)

(exhales)

Pretend you're looking at the chicken.

- Why?

(metal clanking)

- What the hell, man?

- What's the deal with you, and that Hottie,

glazed in a sweet layer of polyester and insecurity?

- Oh, come on.

- Well, are you gonna?

- No, that's my sister.

(gasping)

- Wait, that's Lisa?

- Yeah.

- Oh, man and she's your half sister, right?

- No, she's my full sister.

(laughs)

- If I didn't know.

(laughs)

(exhales)

- What are you doing?

- I went down on my cousin once at Thanksgiving,

not like under the table, but it was in my mimi's room,

and it's hard to tell the difference

between the common meat and the others, you know?

- No.

(exhales)

- Hey Chad, Chad, Chad, Chad, Chad, Chad, Chad, Chad, Chad.

- What's your deal, fuck brain?

- Hey, don't... ladies, don't fight.

But do, but don't, but if you do, use a banana.

- Get me a plantain, I want it to hurt.

- So, what do you think of the chicken?

- I don't think it's chicken.

(exhales)

- That's what I was afraid of.

(air whooshing)

- Didn't know you smoked.

- Oh, I don't.

- Oh. - Yeah.

- Just pretend, look.

- Oh.

- Yeah, kind of just makes me feel cool.

- Can I try?

- Yeah.

(puffs)

(coughs)

- Jeez hold on you vacuum mouth, it's not a doobie.

(laughs)

- I don't know if I like that.

(laughs)

- Yeah, me neither.

(grass rustling)

(gasping)

- Oh, ooh, ooh, ooh.

(laughs)

- What you doing little squirrel?

- I bet we could both fit into this jacket.

(panting)

- Oh. - Ah.

(metal clanking)

- This is how I want to spend the rest of my days.

Driving down the street, listening to the radio

in my cool car, and looking at pretty girls.

- You're fucking loser.

(upbeat music)

- Daddy's home, you stupid fucks.

(upbeat music)

- Hey.

- Oh, I'm sorry.

- Couple of losers in a sausage pack.

- Dude, dude.

- Ladies, diss this scrub, and get with the man,

the King, the father, Mercedes (laughs)

- Why are you guys even here?

- Better question, why are you guys even alive?

- Oh, I forgot to say hi to my buddy, Brian.

- No, shit.

(body thudding)

(laughs)

(groaning)

- You put something on me?

(laughs)

Lisa, don't pee.

- I win.

- You cheat.

(laughs)

- You little bitch, you like that Brian?

Huh?

- Tap out, bitch, tap out.

(groans)

(laughs)

- Yeah, you like that bitch?

(laughs)

Oh, what's up, losers?

- You can't just come in here.

- We can do whatever we want, fatty.

- 'Cause I'm fucking your sister,

I can come into the house, and I can cum into the house.

- Yeah.

- Give it up.

- Boing boing, hey girl, you like hot dogs?

- Dude, that's my sister.

(laughs)

- I like extra Mayo, and chili on mine.

- Gross.

- Sorry, we didn't introduce ourselves.

My name's Bleach, this is Mercedes.

- Kiss, kiss.

(lips smacking)

- Whatever, your name's Jason and Mark.

Two of the most generic ass fucking names on the planet.

(giggles)

- What the fuck did you just say to me?

(lollipop thunking)

- Oh my God.

- I got it.

I got it, I got it. - Get it out, get it out,

it's in my head, get it out. - I got it, I got it.

(door lock opening)

- Hey, babe.

(upbeat music)

- Hey babe.

(heels click-clacking)

What the fuck is going on in here?

- These two tall-ass Mighty Ducks came in,

and ruined our hang.

- Where's my snack?

- Be cool Brian, it's not like mom's even gonna be home

for like two days, or whatever.

So, why don't you just shut the fuck up for once?

- Whatever, we can go hang in my room.

- Wait, who is this little girl?

- [Tony] This is my sister, she's--

- Wow, is she fucking asking you, bro?

No, go ahead babe.

- Let me guess, you're his sister,

and you're visiting for the weekend.

And you're feeling really displaced,

because you don't know anybody here,

which is making you really uncomfortable.

And now you're starting to miss mommy.

- Kinda.

(laughs)

- That sucks.

- Hey, you wanna leave?

- Yeah.

- Hey guys, we're gonna bounce.

- Dammit, Sydney, you ruin fucking everything.

Kate's paid, slut.

- Excuse me.

- Nothing, nothing, nothing, nothing.

(body thudding)

(laughs)

(upbeat music)

♪ I ought to be safe ♪

♪ I probably shouldn't try ♪

- I miss this place.

- Miss the crew?

- (laughs) No.

You ever notice how playgrounds, smell like blood?

- Yeah, kind of do.

- Are you grossed out by blood?

- Yeah, I guess so.

I think it'd be weird, if I said I loved blood.

(laughs)

- Yeah, yeah.

You think you'd ever be grossed out by my blood?

- No, your blood's my blood.

(birds chirping)

(cutlery clanking)

- So, how was your day?

- Good.

- Just hanging out with some friends.

- Which friends?

- Just Brian, and Ched, - Oh.

- and his weird lizard girls.

- I love lizards.

- Of course you do, baby.

(laughs)

- So, Lisa what'd you think of Brian and Ched?

- They're fine.

- You can say it.

- Say what?

- They're fucking losers.

- [Doris] Frank.

- I'm just kidding (laughs)

No.

- You're a fucking loser, dad.

- Excuse me?

- I'm just kidding.

(hands clapping)

(laughs)

- Lisa, do you miss home?

- No, not really.

- Good.

- Good.

That's why, I think it'd be fun if you just

moved in with us your junior year.

- Yeah, I mean, it'd be cool.

You know, living with mom sucks,

and living with us would be...

I mean, Doris cooks great food, and you're cool.

- Thank you.

- Yeah, maybe.

- I think it's an interesting idea.

I mean, as long as you're able to handle my jokes,

and share your tampons with your brother here,

every once in a while.

- [Doris] Frank.

(laughs)

- I don't even use tampons.

- Oh honey.

- I just free bleed.

- Eew.

(spoon clanking)

- I'm just kidding.

- [Frank] Not very funny.

- So, this is creative mode.

So you just go around, build houses,

tend to your chickens, cows.

Here check this out, you see all these dogs?

- Yeah.

- You can hit 'em.

(dog squeaking)

- Yeah. - But--

- But you see I have so many?

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

(dogs squeaking)

- Jesus, where'd they go?

- I killed them.

- Oh.

- No, no, it's not real, look.

(dogs squeaking)

- What are you doing?

- I thought that would make it better.

Jesus, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, I didn't know you'd feel so passionate about it.

- It's fine.

- Look, they're all back.

Better?

- Yeah.

- I have too many fucking dogs.

- Good.

(laughs)

- I need to go to bed, right now.

- Okay, well--

(metal clanking)

Good night.

(light switch clicking)

(peaceful music)

- [Rachel] Fuck you.

- [Frank] Oh, real nice, fuck you.

- [Rachel] Fuck you.

- [Frank] Oh, way to go drama queen, fuck you.

- [Tony] I'm coming to get you.

- [Lisa] You'll never catch me.

- [Frank] Fuck you.

- [Rachel] Oh yeah, whatever, fuck you.

- [Frank] Fuck you.

- [Rachel] Fuck you, (mumbles) like me there.

- [Frank] Well, we couldn't like you,

so if maybe you were a little more fucking likeable.

Yeah, figure out how to be a wife first,

then maybe figure out ho to be a mother.

- I win, I win, I win, I win, I win.

- Yay.

- Tony, my prize.

- [Rachel] I'm only a mess 'cause you're here.

- [Frank] No, I'm not the reason you're a mess,

you're the reason that you are a fucking mess.

- [Rachel] This life is a mess, I'm sick of this,

whatever, man.

- [Frank] Well, I'm sick of this, so much more than you are.

You cannot be half as sick of it as I am.

- [Rachel] Whatever, I'm done with this, I'm go through.

(door lock opening)

- [Rachel] What do you think you're doing?

(palm smacking)

- [Tony] Ah, I--

- [Rachel] You're not thinking, that's what you're doing.

- [Frank] Rachel, eave him alone.

- [Rachel] You're just like him.

(shoes stomping)

(door slams shut)

- [Frank] Don't pick it out on the boy,

pick it out on me. - Hey Tony.

- Race to the street, whoever wins, gets all my candy.

- Oh, it's on.

- [Frank] Anything any more.

- [Rachel] I'm barely able to get out of bed,

do you know that?

- [Frank] Well, and then when you do get out of bed--

♪ I'm afraid, we never grow up ♪

(moans)

♪ So we head too far ♪

♪ And later we'd last (mumbles) ♪

♪ We thought that maybe love is gone ♪

♪ We have nothing left to say ♪

♪ Well I wanna get high ♪

♪ On you tonight ♪

- Tony.

(moaning)

♪ To love you right ♪

♪ To lay down here beside me ♪

♪ Let me take your love inside me ♪

♪ And get high on you tonight ♪

♪ (Upbeat music) ♪

(moans)

♪ Years went by ♪

♪ We met again like strangers do ♪

♪ A secret dream of mine's come true ♪

(moaning)

♪ I'm lying here with you ♪

♪ And I wanna get high ♪

♪ On you tonight ♪

(Moans)

♪ To lay down here beside me ♪

♪ Let me take your love inside me ♪

(Moans)

♪ And get high ♪

♪ On you ♪

(moaning)

(upbeat music)

(panting)

♪ Years went by ♪

♪ We met again like strangers do ♪

♪ (Birds chirping) ♪

(bell tinkling)

(door closing)

(birds chirping)

(phone beeping)

- Hey kiddo.

- Oh, hey Frank, how's the sitting?

- It hurts, my but is not made for sitting.

It's made for standing, and looking pretty.

- Yeah.

- Welcome to my paradise.

(hand slapping floor)

- This is nice, it's like you have your own little getaway.

- Well, to be honest,

it's not really going to be a sitting room.

I'm gonna turn it into a secret cooking room, for Doris.

- Shouldn't that be in the kitchen?

- No, no, I'm gonna redo the whole room,

put a kitchen in it.

Put a bunch of cutting board space over there,

I'll have a vent that goes up to the ceiling.

She can have her gals over whenever wants,

they can take up as much space as they want.

- So, it'll be like a little getaway kitchen.

- Exactly.

- You must really love her.

- All her words aren't my favorite words,

but yeah, I really do love her.

(birds chirping)

Sleep well?

- Yeah, you?

- Oh, hell yeah (laughs)

Isn't it nice?

- [Lisa] Yeah.

- I'm happy you're here kiddo.

- Me too, Frank, me too.

(snoring)

(door opening)

(door clicking shut)

Tony.

Tony.

Tony, Tony.

Tony.

- What?

(panting)

What?

- Hi.

- Hey.

- You're gonna come to breakfast?

- Yeah.

- Okay.

I love you.

- Yeah, I know.

(door opening)

(door clicking shut)

♪ That'll make you happy ♪

♪ Would you have it on your mind ♪

(cutlery clanking)

- [Doris] You know, your friends are always

welcome over here.

- Yeah, we know.

(hand slapping)

- [Doris] I just love a good excuse to make more casserole.

- Yeah, It's just Brian has a--

- It's a party, Doris.

- [Doris] Ooh a party, Lisa, you wanna borrow a dress later?

- They're all tight, the boys love tight.

Isn't that right son?

- Yeah, we like tight.

- I'll wear this.

(metal dish clanking)

- [Doris] Oops.

- You okay, honey?

- [Doris] Yeah, just slippery hands.

- Well, don't dry those hands off.

- [Doris] What?

Oh, come on, you shut up now you dirty man.

- Doris, do you want any help?

- [Doris] I got it, thanks sweetie.

- Now look at that kids, a pretty woman

looking sexy every day.

My sweet, precious fruit of my loins,

this is it, this is the life.

To find someone who makes you, like this peach.

To find someone who's soft, and ready to burst,

and when they burst, you don't mind getting a little messy.

(munches)

- [Doris] Frank, I hear you.

- What?

I'm teaching my kids something.

Life lessons, sharing something special.

- Don't listen to him, he's just a dirty little horn dog.

(laughs)

Frank, you can't just talk to them like that.

- [Frank] What?

They get it.

(laughs)

- I do agree, a love like this is special.

I mean, everyone deserves it.

It can be hard, but--

- You know what helps?

Is that dresses.

(laughs)

- Are you sure you don't wanna borrow something sweetie?

- I feel comfortable in this.

- She doesn't need tight dresses to look pretty.

She's already perfectly wrapped in her own skin.

(laughs)

- That is a scary pickup line son (laughs)

- Can we go?

- Yeah.

- Doris, what are you putting in these potatoes?

These are unreal.

(bell tinkling)

(door opening)

- Hey sis, you ready?

(door clicking shut)

- Yeah, in just a second.

- You look fine, you look very pretty.

- I don't really feel pretty today.

- Hang on.

(shoes stomping)

(door opening)

(papers rustling)

(door clicking shut)

- Here.

(gasping)

Good?

- Yes.

- Okay, I have more.

- Yeah?

- Yeah, but you have to keep wearing this, if you want more.

- Okay, fine.

- Cool, I'll be downstairs, okay?

Same you, same candy, yeah?

- Yeah.

- [Tony] Okay, cool.

(door opening)

(door clicking shut)

(shoes click clacking)

(door knocking)

(door squeaking open)

Frank?

- Oh, hey Tony.

- What's up?

- Just sitting.

- Isn't that what the sitting room's for?

- Hurts my butt to sit on the ground all the time.

- Oh.

(hand slapping)

(shoes click clacking)

(hand slapping)

- I don't think I've ever talked with you about man stuff.

- No need, I got it.

- Well, my best advice to you,

is to always tell the person you love, what you do.

- That's good advice.

- Yeah, men aren't always hard.

I've never had a problem in that way,

and your blood is my blood, so--

- Yeah, I got it.

- Do you mind doing me a favor son?

- Sure.

- Today is a special day for Doris.

- Oh, is it her birthday?

- Oh, I have no idea when that is.

I bought her a bunch of new cooking books,

and she's gonna go crazy, when she sees how many I got her.

- That's really nice.

- Do you think you could set up

the bathroom with some candles?

I'd do it myself, but--

- Yeah, sure.

- Great.

- What's that?

- Oh, I missed the Annual Peach and Music Festival,

this year.

It's just really frustrating.

(peaceful music)

(door clicking shut)

(shoes click clacking)

(door opening)

- What are you doing?

- Oh, date night for dad.

- Cute.

(lighter flicking)

(lighter flicking)

- [Frank] She's our kid, and this is her home.

- [Rachel] She's going away.

- [Frank] She belongs where

she's loved, Rachel. - You are no match for us,

I'm Princess Fairy Sparkle.

- [Frank] Where do you think you're gonna go?

(toys thwacking)

- He's not going down. - No, no you cannot take

those kids away from me.

- I said pony.

- We need new rear - No, Rachel,

- reinforcements. - this is not fair,

you cannot do this.

- Acorn bombs. - You have no idea

what you're doing.

Rachel come on, get back here.

This is ridiculous. - Boom.

- He's still not down.

(toys thwacking)

- [Rachel] Come on Lisa, let's go,

right now, lets go come on.

- [Lisa] Tony.

(shoes stomping)

- [Rachel] Come on.

- [Lisa] Tony.

(car door opening)

(car door slamming shut)

(car engine revving)

(birds chirping)

- We need to go.

(upbeat music)

(hands slapping)

- Good job.

(paper rustling)

(hand slapping)

What's up man?

- Ched failed his culinary training program.

- Oh, dude.

- And his two golf girls, dumped him.

- Oh no.

- I wanna get fucked up tonight.

- Sure.

- Hey, shut the fuck up, Brian,

fuck you. - What did I say?

What the fuck did I say?

- Hey did you guys get invited to that party tonight?

- You got invited to a party?

- Yeah, from some chick named, Magnificent Pleasure.

- What?

Lets see, man, lets see.

Fuck.

- [Ched] Yeah, I'd pin that down real nice.

- She looks nice.

- Oh, of course she does, she wants a penis inside of her.

- Do you wanna go?

- No, I don't wanna go if that bitch is going.

- What the fuck is going on in here?

What are you guys looking at?

- No, nothing.

- Just saw that party invite.

- So, are you guys coming?

- Sure.

- I felt bad about the other night.

I just wanted you guys to see how cool I am.

- Whatever, you just want me to drive.

- Yeah, pretty much, 'cause I'm gonna get fucked up tonight.

- What if he said he wouldn't drive you?

- Oh, then I would just tell everyone,

that little Brian never--

- Shut up, Lisa, its nothing.

- Oh, you know what?

I'm almost forgot to mention, Charlie's gonna be there.

- Ooh, Charlie's gonna be there.

Yeah, man would wanna miss out on that good old D-sucking.

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

- Okay, fine, we'll go, and I'll drive.

But I don't like one bit of it.

- Except Charlie.

(upbeat music)

- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

- [Brian] I will burn it, I will burn this.

- What are you wearing?

- [Ched] Hey man, hey, hey, hey.

Quit jerking around.

- Come on, man, you know he's sensitive about that.

- You are not wearing that.

- What should I wear?

- I think she looks great.

- Oh, are you a girl?

No, sorry.

Come with me right now.

- [Ched] Just give it back to me.

- Okay, hey, whoa, that's hey, that's enough.

- That's not enough.

- That is enough.

- Here you go.

Pick one.

- It's fine, I mean, I feel comfortable in this.

- Do it.

- Okay.

- Great.

- Okay, well, I'll be right back.

- No, just change in here.

What?

Do you have like chest hair, or something?

- No.

Okay.

(clothes rustling)

♪ If you're feeling not so strong ♪

♪ I just want someone to lean on ♪

(clothes rustling)

(zip closing)

- (chuckles) That'll be fine.

- Thanks.

(upbeat music)

- Well, I have to get changed, so...

- Okay.

♪ But together, we'll walk into the morning ♪

Oh, all right, yeah.

♪ We are here ♪

♪ I'll help you up ♪

- You see right there.

- Yeah. - We'll see?

- Yeah, I could cook something with that.

- [Lisa] Hey guys.

- Huh, my sister lets you wear the dress,

she miscarried in.

- What?

- I think it looks nice.

- Thanks.

- Okay bitches, come on, let's go.

- It's so early.

- I said I wanna go.

- I'm not even ready yet.

- Yes you are, you look like shit, isn't that your thing?

- All right, let's get this over with.

- Okay.

(shoes click-clacking)

(car engine revving)

(upbeat music)

♪ Couldn't stay ♪

♪ But I should bet you can ♪

♪ I wanna ♪

- [Brian] How long do I have to stay?

- As long as I want.

- Really?

- Hey, come on, that girl's gonna be there.

- Okay, all right, okay.

- Yeah.

♪ Just going nowhere fast ♪

♪ Don't think I'm in the past ♪

(window motor whining)

(car engine revving)

♪ Shouldn't much harder ♪

♪ Baby I can't wait to break your heart ♪

(upbeat music)

♪ Give me something good ♪

♪ And you know heart will tear it all apart ♪

(car engine revving)

(upbeat music)

(car doors slumming shut)

- [Lisa] So, this is the... Okay.

- My dad ate a bug once.

- [Lisa] Why?

- I don't know, it's like a water bug, I guess.

- Why'd he eat that?

- It was in the (mumbles)

- [Lisa] Oh.

- [Ched] Couldn't eat up a hotdog.

(laughs)

(barfing)

(crowd chanting)

- Go celebrate (mumbles) tonight.

(door knocking)

- Don't need to knock, it's a fucking party.

(upbeat music)

(crowd chattering)

- Up this way.

- Shots, shots, shots, shots.

- You guys seen a ripe bananas?

- Yeah.

- Nice.

- Hey (laughs)

(upbeat music)

(crowd chattering)

(shoes click-clacking)

- Charlie, Charlie.

- Hey Brian.

- It's good to see you,

and you look good tonight.

- I know.

- You know, I--

- Well, if it isn't little baby Brian (laughs)

- Fuck.

(laughs)

- Hey, look.

- No, hey stop, for real, that's enough,

stop, please, stop, just stop.

(laughs)

- Hey, I'm Tony.

This is my sister, Lisa.

- Really?

Lisa, where you from?

- Southern.

- What are you doing here?

- Visiting my brother, and dad, for the weekend.

- Ah, so this is like your full blood sister.

- Yeah.

- Did you guys like piggy back out of the womb, or what?

(laughs)

- No, I'm actually a year older.

- Oh, dirty mommy.

Yeah, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

(laughs)

- Hey boys, here's a fun fact.

Brian shit his pants, last time he was at this house.

(laughs)

- You really are a little chocolate boy.

- Fuck you guy, I just got here.

- What the fuck are you gonna do about it?

- Hey, now, now, now who knows?

He might've had some laxative with his beer,

or maybe he just got scared,

'cause there was too many pretty ladies running around.

(laughs)

- Fuck you, fucking suck up.

- Brian.

- I wanna come with you.

(laughs)

- Hey.

- Yeah?

- I'm hungry.

- Oh, all right, and that's it for me, boys.

Touchdown for Bleach.

(shoes click-clacking)

- Lisa.

- Hey, you look stressed.

- Yeah, loosen up.

- Lisa, do you smoke weed?

Did you get high?

Do you lift this curtain, that we call life?

See what's on the other side?

- Yeah, sometimes, but I don't ever really feel it.

- You got to inhale it, like really inhale it.

(bong burbling)

(coughs)

(laughing)

You feel it?

- Well, I only felt your tongue.

(laughs)

(coughs)

- Brian?

(gasping)

- You really should have taken your clothes off first.

- I just don't know where my life is going, okay?

I'm a fucking loser, nobody respects me,

you don't like me, you're my best friend,

and let's be honest, you kinda suck.

My other best friend's trying to fuck two bananas out there.

So I am sorry, if I am having a moment of despair.

- Come on, man, I don't suck.

- Really?

- You're cool, you're funny.

- Oh yeah, funny, yeah.

I remember last year, when you thought it was cool

and funny, how I shit my pants, yeah (laughs)

- It was artistic.

You were brave, you were so brave.

- Yeah, you hear that?

You're an art guy now, huh?

Big man on campus, come on, let's get out of that tub.

- Just leave me here with the water.

- Come on, man.

- Come on Brian, stop it.

- Jesus.

- Hey Tony.

(upbeat music)

(lips smacking)

- [Charlie] Okay, okay (mumbles)

(lighter flicking)

(bong burbling)

- That's enough for you.

- This feeling, does not feel good.

- It passes (laughs)

- Hey, you okay?

- No, where's Tony?

- Relax, he's inside with Charlie (laughs)

- They are already fucking by now.

(laughs)

- Oh, yeah, oh yeah.

- I doubt it.

- Are you thinking he can't get hard?

(laughs)

- No he can.

- How do you know that?

- I don't know.

- Yeah, how do you know that?

- Just (laughs) stop, whatever you're doing.

- What?

- My brother can get hard, okay.

I've seen it, it's proportional, it's a good penis.

That's... Stop freaking me out.

- You're the one talking about your brother's dick,

and how hard it is.

- I'm kidding, seriously.

- Weird joke, that wasn't very funny.

(bong burbling)

- No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

(upbeat music)

Stop it.

- Tony.

Tony.

(upbeat music)

(crowd chattering)

Tony.

♪ I'm a weirdo ♪

♪ What the hell am I doing here ♪

- Ched, Ched, have you seen Tony?

- He's ours.

- I could be everybody's.

(crowd chattering)

(door slamming shut)

(screams)

(panting)

(door slamming shut)

(moans)

(slurping)

- Sorry.

(upbeat music)

- How are you even doing this?

- I love hotdogs.

I'm gonna eat yours right up,

and swallow it so hard, it goes down to the pit of my tummy.

- No.

(water burbling)

- Sydney.

Sydney.

Have you seen Sydney?

- No.

- Fuck you.

- Hey, your fly is down you fucking asshole.

(door slums shut)

(upbeat music)

- Celebrate only, come on.

- Shots, shots, shots.

(upbeat music)

- Tom.

- Lisa.

- Have you ever had sex?

(upbeat music)

- [Charlie] Ouch.

(water splashing)

- You like movies?

- Yeah.

- Come back.

- Ah we gotta go.

Lisa, can we go, now?

- Nice to meet you.

- Can I come with you?

- [Tony] All right, come on.

- I'm Violet.

- I'm Cage.

- Sometimes I feel like I'm trapped in a cage.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

(panting)

(paper rustling)

(shoes stomping)

(panting)

(body thudding)

- Tony, I think I'm high.

And I told those guys that your dick is nice,

and it gets hard.

- What?

Why did that come up?

- I don't know, I got caught off guard.

- You told them about my dick?

- Yeah.

- Jeez, Lisa we've gotta keep things between us, okay?

Rule number one, rule.

- I thought rule number one, was to be honest.

- No, yeah, that too.

- And to be honest, I didn't know we had rules.

- Look, whatever, I have a nice penis.

So what if you told them?

But honestly I gotta get going Lisa,

because right now, there's honestly--

Up, there she is, okay. - Tony wait.

You're hot, you're great, you have stuff

going on down there, that's crazy.

- What do you mean?

- I touched it.

- Tony?

- She did not touch it, okay?

Okay, so she touched it, but I did not want that.

I did not want any of that.

- Are you jealous because I'm pretty?

- Hey, whatever the fuck your name is,

that's my sister you're talking to.

You're a nightmare, and Brian deserves

better than some cum-guzzling bitch.

- Whoa.

- Whoa.

- Whoa,

- Let's go.

(groaning)

(shoes stomping)

- Oh shit, look who it is, it's the change guy.

- Guys, how's it going?

You guys look great.

It's like seeing a, you know, a teacher in the real world.

- Except you want to fuck her.

(laughs)

- Don't you always want to fuck her.

(body thudding)

Anyway, how's things going?

What are you doing tonight?

- We're good.

- We were gonna go.

- Oh, we love the parties.

Wait, what?

Stick around.

- Fight.

- Fucking stop, man, yo what's up, man.

- Why am I gonna fucking chill?

- Shut up, man.

- I'm not gonna fucking chill, bitch is size.

- It doesn't matter, man.

- It does matter, bitch.

- Tony, I wanna go home.

- Okay, lets go.

- Hey, Hey Lisa, can I talk to you for a second?

- We're leaving.

- Not talking to you, you fucking idiot.

- Man, we'll get out of your hair.

- Dude, get off me, all right?

I need to talk to Lisa, hey.

(hand grabbing)

- Don't touch her.

- What the fuck are you gonna do about it?

- Hey, I'm not done talking--

(hand grabbing)

(crowd chattering)

Why do you like my dick so much, huh?

You like that?

You like that?

- No man, you like that.

- The fuck did you say to me?

- You know what I said.

(tense music)

(crowd cheering)

- You'll think of me.

They always think of me.

(tense music)

(door sliding open)

- Brian, come on.

Ched, Ched.

Ched, come on.

- Dude, no, no, no, dude I'm trying to chill.

- There we go.

- Tony, Tony, come on, let's go.

(crowd chattering)

- Are you a guy who likes me

to call his dick, a conqueror penis?

- I like dick.

- Me too.

(laughs)

(tense music)

- Where is she at?

Where's the other one?

Yeah.

(tense music)

- Just leave me here.

- Hurry, hurry, right, right.

(panting)

(car engine revving)

(tense music)

(moans)

(lips smacking)

(moans)

(lips smacking)

- God, it smells like shit in here.

- Hey, shut up.

- Sorry.

(moans)

- Fun night?

(car engine revving)

(car door slamming shut)

(keys clunking)

- [Brian] Leave them.

(car squeaking)

(peaceful music)

(horn blaring)

(door opening)

(laughs)

- That was weird.

- Yeah.

(laughs)

- Tell me if I'm crazy.

- Your crazy.

- No (laughs)

No, no, yeah.

Have you ever thought about, ah--

- I've had lots of thoughts.

- Me too.

You were really nice back there.

- Yeah, your sure I felt pretty aggressive.

- Yeah, that too.

That I liked it, I thought it was pretty cool.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

(alarm beeping)

Oh no.

(peaceful music)

(moans)

- Have I ever told you, that you're

the most beautiful woman in the world?

- Every day.

- I just wanted to tell you again.

(lips smacking)

♪ Love is a dream ♪

♪ A dance beneath the stars ♪

♪ Funny how it's always there and ever moving ♪

- You look very nice.

- Yeah.

♪ Time brings change ♪

- Can this be a--

- Yes.

- Promise.

♪ A river empties constantly ♪

- I think I'm in love with you, Tony.

- Please, call me brother.

(peaceful music)

(car engine revving)

(leaves rustling)

(car door slamming shut)

- Oh no.

(door opening)

(door slamming shut)

(screaming) - What the?

- Oh, what the fuck?

- Lisa. - What the fuck?

- Lisa. - Rachel, what the fuck

are you doing here?

- What the fuck are you doing?

I'm just picking on my kid, Lisa.

- [Rachel] Lisa.

- [Frank] You're not even fun yet Rachel.

You are--

- [Rachel] Or we could both (mumbles)

- No, you don't just attack her like that,

she's a nice lady.

- Oh, fuck you.

Come on, I bet he fucking calls you

a dirty little slut, when he slapped your ass.

Lisa, come on. - Jesus Christ,

it's not even time yet.

You see, this is why we never worked out.

Because you don't know how to fucking communicate.

You're coming way too early.

- [Rachel] You came too early.

Lisa, where are you?

Come on.

(shoes stomping)

Jesus, it's about time.

You look awful.

- Hi mom.

- Hi.

Come on, let's go.

It's time to go, come on, come on.

- Bye Tony.

(door slams shut)

(bag dragging)

- Come on.

(leaves rustling)

- Sorry champ.

- Come on, hurry.

Get In.

Come on, what are you?

(upbeat music)

Come on, please, let's go.

- Tony, wait.

- Come on, what the fuck?

(singing in foreign language)

- Yah (mumbles)

- What the fuck.

(singing in foreign language)

(munches)

(singing in foreign language)