Original subtitles

Well, we're moving on up. We're moving on up. To the side. We're moving on up.

To the deep.

the concert with tonight?

Oh, just the girls.

You know, we got together and we decided we were tired of sitting around waiting

for a man to call.

So we said, who needs him? We can have fun without men.

So we made a pact that none of us is going to break.

One for all and all for one.

Like the four musketeers.

Well, anyway, three. Vernetta got a date.

You know, Weez, I hear what's happening to these lonely, pathetic women, and I

just thank my lucky stars.

That you landed me.

Bye, Bertha.

Well, Bertha just canceled. She got a date, too.

And no money changed hands?

George!

Don't George me. You're the one that said Bertha had a face only a zoologist

could love.

Well, I think what I meant was she looked like she was good with animals.

Yeah. Well, her date better be, too.

Oh, hi, Miss Willis. Hi, everybody.

Hi, Helen.

Attenzione.

Attenzione.

I want to take this opportunity to introduce to you the hottest model in

York, and here he is, wearing the latest in Italian sportswear, Signore Tom

Willis.

by Giovanni Avenez.

Sport coat by Guido Albione.

Shirt by Nino.

Slacks by Aldo.

Body by pizza.

Mr. Willis looks so different.

He looks terrific.

Oh, that's what it is.

Grazie, grazie. But I owe it all to my little Helena.

Well, I thought it was about time that Tom got some new clothes.

Actually, George, it was you who gave me the idea. You were looking so Italian

yourself yesterday.

What are you talking about? I had on my plaid sport jacket.

But you had spaghetti all over your tie.

Well, Florence cooked the spaghetti. Where's I supposed to have it? In my

Well, I would have sent you to a good dry cleaner, but I don't know one.

The outfit is great.

Oh, prega, prega.

But don't you think you're a little overdressed for a movie?

Well, as a matter of fact, we have a little surprise.

We're not going to the movies.

Great, see you later.

You know, what Tom means is we've made other plans.

Oh, Louise, you remember years ago when we used to haunt those jazz clubs down

in the village? Oh, yes, that was fun. Well, tonight we are going to recapture

those good old days.

A smart cocktail, a smoke -filled room, and a husky voice shone, too, singing a

song like Stormy Weather.

Don't know why there's...

Oh, that sounds like fun.

What's the occasion?

Well, there's no special occasion.

We thought we would just... We thought we would just celebrate the

camaraderie of good friends. It'll be terrific.

We can...

We could have a couple of drinks in one spot, and then... And

then if we get tired of the singer, we can move on.

It keeps raining all the time.

Well, I'm tired of this one now. Let's go.

Oh, great. The limo's waiting downstairs.

Limo? Well, you really went all out. Oh, I... I know, but I figured, why not

travel in style now?

Why wait for a close relative to die?

Come on, Lena.

Y 'all have a good time.

We will. You too, Florence.

I just want to get one thing straight. I ain't riding in a limo if I got to ride

backwards. Oh, I'll do it. You know how I enjoy seeing where I've been.

Florence, I was just going to pop over.

Oh, hi, Mr. Bentley. What's up? Well, I was hoping you might lend me a small

portable TV that doesn't work.

Why do you want a TV that doesn't work?

Well, so that I won't be able to watch it, of course.

Oh.

Perhaps I have deleted a detail or two. You see, Hermione is coming over this

evening for some dinner and a little tele -watching. Now, my intention is to

her on the sofa, turn on the set, and not get a picture.

Get the picture?

What on earth are y 'all going to do on a sofa in front of a TV that don't work?

What?

I should have guessed. I'm sorry, Mr. Bentley, but all the TVs in this house

in tip -top shape.

Oh, dash it all. Well, thank you anyway.

Why don't you just unplug yours?

Florence, I'm surprised at you. That would be dishonest.

Hi, Florence.

Oh, hi, Amanda. Girl, I'm glad you're here.

Come on in.

How you feeling?

Fine, girl.

Real fine.

Listen here, Florence.

I got some good news and I got some bad news.

What? Well, really, it's the same news. Only it's good for me and bad for you.

See, a couple weeks ago, I put an ad in a personal section of Street Scene

magazine so I could meet me a man.

Amanda, that is the most desperate, pathetic thing you have ever done.

Well, it worked.

It didn't.

Girl, the simplest score I ever made in my life.

Of course, I got to admit I was a little leery at first, because how was I to

know I wasn't going to meet a one -eyed cat peeking in a seafood store?

Well, how did y 'all first make contact?

Ain't going to be no contact, at least until he pops for dinner.

I mean, how did y 'all arrange to meet?

We exchanged letters through the magazine, and then we agreed to meet in

park. I told him to wear a red carnation, because even though he could

through my letters I was a kind, sensitive woman, how was I to know he

going to look like the dog's dinner?

But he turned out to be real cute.

That's great.

Why don't you finish telling me on the way to the concert?

Uh, Flora, now see, that's where your bad news comes in.

Okay, you ain't going.

Oh, Flora, this is Henry's only night off, and he wants to go out to dinner.

So here, I brought you the tickets.

Well, you just wasted your time, because Bertha and Bernetta ain't going either.

Why? They got dates.

Huh? They got dates.

What? They got dates, okay?

From this planet?

Here, you and Henry take the tickets. I ain't going by myself.

Maybe you could go with us.

No, I'd just be a third wheel.

Yeah, you would.

Oh, wait.

Maybe this could turn out better than we thought.

Now, Henry's got a brother that's single that ain't never got nothing to do.

Maybe he could go with us. Let's still leave one ticket.

Yeah? Yeah, then we can scalp that one and use it to pay for the other ones.

Bye, Flora.

a seam.

It won't be the first time today.

Y 'all have fun?

Oh, Flores, you wouldn't believe it. From the moment we got into the

and Tom told the driver...

You're looking at it.

I thought you were going to the currency with Amanda.

She got a date.

Got a date? You sure she didn't say she ate a date? Oh, that's it!

His name is Henry.

She met him through Street Scene magazine.

She put an ad in the personals. Oh, well, did you read it? Maybe the guy

he was getting a recreational vehicle.

I got us a tuna sandwich.

I'm sorry, Florence.

Now, you'll probably laugh in my face for suggesting this, but have you ever

written one of those ads yourself?

Ha, ha.

Plain middle -aged female.

Seeks man for companionship and possible romance.

Well, that could attract someone.

I know you're trying to be helpful, Miss Jefferson, but I'd just as soon stay by

myself. I'm used to it now.

Oh, Florence, don't... Okay, well, we'll see you in the morning.

You know, Florence, you shouldn't describe yourself as plain.

Look, I think you're damn near acceptable.

Nice. Okay, you still interested in putting that ad in the paper? Because if

are, you can talk to me. I mean, I'm quite a wordsmith, you know.

In fact, you know that phrase, in by nine, out by five?

You wrote that? Well, the in by nine part.

Okay, now, see what we got here on the paper.

Ah, plain middle -aged. You see that? Plain. Okay, what exactly is plain?

Tone, down, beautiful.

Okay? Now, down, we don't need that because it's a negative, okay?

This is not a musical, so we don't need no tone.

Okay, what's left?

Beautiful.

Yeah, well.

Okay,

now, middle -aged. Okay, now, what is middle -aged?

Now, if you're going to die tomorrow, that would be old, right?

If you're going to live to be 102, then that'd be young. So are you planning on

dying tomorrow?

No. Well, then you're young.

What else?

Female. Yeah, well, see, now you're getting the idea.

Thanks, Mr. Jefferson, but you're just wasting your time.

There's no way this is going to work.

It worked! It worked!

See, I told you it would work.

What worked?

I got an answer to my ad.

Well, congratulations.

What does he say?

What difference does it make what he said? He's a dream man.

He can write and afford a stamp.

Dear Box G -103, that's me.

I have grown weary of dating night after night after night.

I would enjoy a steadier and more meaningful relationship.

If this sounds appealing, meet me on the 10th at 2 o 'clock near the bandstand

in the park.

I wonder who it is.

I'll be wearing plaid pants and saddle shoes.

Well, we know it ain't Calvin Klein.

Hey, this is the 10th.

I gotta make a decision.

What do you think I should do?

Well, Florence, what do you feel like doing?

I don't know.

Well, oh, what have you got to lose?

Look in your heart. Take a chance.

No, Florence, you look in your mirror and take a taxi.

I can't believe the coincidence.

Of all the people who respond to those personal ads, the one who answers yours

turns out to be your neighbor.

You know, it's as if somebody wrote this.

Somebody did.

Crime and punishment.

I don't think it's so strange.

After all, Mr. Bentley and I have known each other a long time, and we get along

just fine.

As a matter of fact, we like a lot of the same things.

So we said, what could it hurt to see a movie together?

I couldn't agree with you more.

Still, I can't shake the feeling that our usher's going to be Rod Serling.

Uh, well, Florence, it's only natural you're a little apprehensive.

So just treat Mr.

Bentley like any other date.

Right. With a little luck, we won't have to see him again either.

Well, wisecrack all you want, Mr. Jefferson, but I'm going to give this a

It could work, you know.

Stranger things have happened.

Yeah, name one.

Somebody married you.

George, don't you realize how awkward this must be for Florence and Mr.

Bentley?

Now, this would make things a lot easier if you'd behave yourself. Okay.

I promise to behave myself, all right?

I'll be a perfect gentleman.

Hello, Mr. Jay.

Gesundheit. Hello, Mr. Bentley.

Won't you come in? Thank you, Mrs. J.

So, how are you feeling tonight?

Good, thank you.

And you?

Good.

And you, Mr. J. How are you feeling? Good, I hope.

Yeah, I'm good.

Well, it sounds as though we're all good.

My, what a lovely place you have here.

Come on, Benny, cut the small talk, okay?

Look, you're not actually going to kiss her, are you?

Mr. Jay, please.

But, Benny, you've dated hundreds of beautiful women before.

Why stop now?

Well, it's embarrassing to admit, but if the truth were out, I don't really date

that much. I guess I just talk a good game.

You mean you've been making up all your girlfriends?

Oh, not all. Just the ones with whom I've had deep, meaningful relationships.

See, the fact is, I've been quite lonely lately, and, uh... Well, I know I've

squired a knockout or two in my day, but what I'm really after in a woman is

substance. I mean, you take away a beautiful body, and what have you got?

Hi, Mr. Bentley.

Hello, Florence, and please call me Harry.

Okay.

Hey,

you're really looking sharp tonight.

Thank you. You know, we'd better skedaddle if we want to eat before the

Oh, I know what you mean, Mr. Bedley. I just hate being late to a movie.

Because you just spend the rest of the movie wondering what you have missed.

And you try climbing over people and stepping into sticky sody pop.

And people are yelling down in front.

And you keep wondering if there's chewing gum on your seat. And then

J.

Yes? I would kind of like to catch the movie before it's sold to cable TV.

I'm sorry. You two have a good time. Thank you. Good night.

Night. Yeah, stay out of trouble.

George, they are adults.

I know that, Weezy, but look, it's a full moon tonight, and one of them is

to turn into something.

How's your seat?

Fine. Yours?

I hope

the movie starts soon.

Me too.

Good.

I love movies with subtitles.

I like subtitles too.

Do you like Truffaut?

Of course.

Nice cinematography.

Yeah.

Every frame has a picture.

I hate that sort of behavior in public.

Why don't they just stay home?

I had a lovely time.

Harry.

So did I, Florence.

Would you like to go out again?

Florence, listen, I hope what I'm going to say isn't going to hurt your

feelings, but I don't think we should date anymore.

Are you serious?

Forgive me, but I've been uncomfortable all evening. I should have said

something at dinner.

Are you sure?

Positive. Oh, Mr.

Bentley, that's wonderful!

You're not angry?

No, I feel exactly the same way you do.

Oh, what a relief. I was afraid you liked me.

I'm not sure you like me.

No, I don't like you.

about to mess up a perfectly good friendship.

Yes, isn't it amazing the silly things people will do out of loneliness?

Oh, yes.

But now you remember, if you ever get lonely again, you can always call me and

we'll go out.

As friends?

As friends.

Oh.

Good night, Mr. Bentley.

Good night.

Oh, hi, Mr. Jefferson.

What are you doing still up?

Well, Johnny Carson just went off. I needed a few more laughs, so I figured

wait for you.

How was your date?

Oh, fine.

As a matter of fact, we're going to do it again. What?

As friends.

You know, we learned something tonight.

No matter how lonely two people get, it's nothing to build a romance on.

I guess it's like they say in that play.

You have to want somebody, not just somebody.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

You know, Florence, I think you made the right choice.

I do, too.

Well, thanks, Mr. Jefferson.

Good night.

Good night.

In fact, I know you made the right choice.