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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,550 --> 00:00:05,410 Well, we're moving on up, we're moving on up to the... 2 00:01:10,830 --> 00:01:12,690 Okay, Miss Jefferson, true or false? 3 00:01:12,930 --> 00:01:16,030 Nautical miles are longer than conventional miles. 4 00:01:16,830 --> 00:01:18,450 False. No, true. 5 00:01:19,170 --> 00:01:20,630 Okay, now this one is easy. 6 00:01:21,750 --> 00:01:28,609 Sonar was invented in 1940 by Laurel and Hardy during the filming of 7 00:01:28,610 --> 00:01:29,690 Saps at Sea. 8 00:01:33,090 --> 00:01:35,450 True. Oh, false. 9 00:01:35,451 --> 00:01:40,199 Miss Jefferson, I thought you told me you memorized all these questions. 10 00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:42,820 I did. It's the answers I didn't memorize. 11 00:01:42,821 --> 00:01:48,859 Mr. Jefferson, how are you going to be the hit of Mr. Jefferson's Navy reunion 12 00:01:48,860 --> 00:01:50,970 if you don't know nothing about the Navy? 13 00:01:51,840 --> 00:01:57,539 Florence, for the last time, I don't want to be the hit of George's Navy 14 00:01:57,540 --> 00:02:00,600 tonight. And besides, I know what the Navy's about. 15 00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:04,360 It's a place where young boys train to be young men. 16 00:02:04,700 --> 00:02:09,359 so that they can get together years later and act like young boys all over 17 00:02:09,360 --> 00:02:10,410 again. 18 00:02:11,620 --> 00:02:15,220 Mr. Jefferson, now I'm sure Mr. Jefferson has grown up by now. 19 00:02:16,980 --> 00:02:18,030 Come on, Weas. 20 00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:25,720 Or grown out. 21 00:02:25,721 --> 00:02:30,399 Hurry up, Weasley. The guys will be here any minute to take us to the hotel. You 22 00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:31,450 gotta get dressed. 23 00:02:31,820 --> 00:02:33,320 I'm already dressed. 24 00:02:33,321 --> 00:02:36,179 What happened to the outfit I picked out for you? 25 00:02:36,180 --> 00:02:37,620 You mean this? 26 00:02:38,440 --> 00:02:39,490 Yes. 27 00:02:43,720 --> 00:02:45,040 Gee, I don't know. 28 00:02:45,440 --> 00:02:49,780 I thought I'd save this until someone asked me to do a Popeye impression. 29 00:02:51,440 --> 00:02:54,620 Please, this is a Navy reunion, not a junior prom. 30 00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:56,400 You see what I look like? 31 00:02:59,060 --> 00:03:01,590 Lars, is anything wrong with the way I'm dressed? 32 00:03:01,700 --> 00:03:03,220 Now, Mr. Jefferson, you know. 33 00:03:03,550 --> 00:03:05,290 that you and I have different teeth. 34 00:03:05,310 --> 00:03:07,770 I have mine, and you have none. 35 00:03:12,470 --> 00:03:16,550 Well, George, you have to admit, this shirt is a little small. 36 00:03:17,010 --> 00:03:18,390 Ain't nothing wrong with it. 37 00:03:18,610 --> 00:03:20,010 You know how fabric is. 38 00:03:20,330 --> 00:03:22,730 If you don't wear it for a while, it tightens up. 39 00:03:22,930 --> 00:03:24,790 It just needs time to grow, that's all. 40 00:03:24,810 --> 00:03:25,860 Hi, 41 00:03:26,150 --> 00:03:27,450 George. Hey. Hi, Louise. 42 00:03:28,159 --> 00:03:30,389 Aw, George, what happened to your uniform? 43 00:03:30,390 --> 00:03:34,279 Doesn't anybody around here know anything about fabric? What do you want? 44 00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:37,819 actually, Helen sent me down here to pick up the pantlets she lent you about 45 00:03:37,820 --> 00:03:41,759 house on Cape Cod. Okay, Tom, I'll go get them. Thank you. Oh, Louise, aren't 46 00:03:41,760 --> 00:03:43,140 you forgetting something? 47 00:03:43,500 --> 00:03:44,740 Oh, right. 48 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:54,380 She just put it there so she'd know where it is. 49 00:03:54,381 --> 00:03:57,539 So you're going to spring for that house in Cape Cod, huh? 50 00:03:57,540 --> 00:04:00,790 Oh, now, wait a minute, George. The house hasn't come through yet. 51 00:04:00,940 --> 00:04:03,770 But let me show you the ring that I bought for Helen today. 52 00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:06,960 Well, uh, if boring me makes you happy. 53 00:04:08,280 --> 00:04:09,330 Not bad, huh? 54 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:11,450 What is it? 55 00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:20,259 It's called a cat's eye opal, and it's found only in Bolivia. And it's so 56 00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:23,700 there that it has to be smuggled out between the toes of llamas. 57 00:04:27,880 --> 00:04:31,730 I don't have to tell you how sensitive the area between a llama's toes can get. 58 00:04:32,500 --> 00:04:34,540 That's right, especially with that heat. 59 00:04:35,760 --> 00:04:40,019 I'll thank you. Well, normally these babies go anywhere from a hundred bucks 60 00:04:40,020 --> 00:04:44,840 up. But this man I met on 8th Avenue, he was liquidating his entire inventory. 61 00:04:45,100 --> 00:04:49,420 And he let me have this one for, you won't believe it, $25. 62 00:04:49,960 --> 00:04:54,099 It's a marble, Willis. George, you should have seen his trunk. It was 63 00:04:54,100 --> 00:04:55,240 with them. It's a marble. 64 00:04:56,151 --> 00:04:58,219 A marble? 65 00:04:58,220 --> 00:05:02,980 Yeah! A guy cut a marble in half, and he glued it on this old cheap band. 66 00:05:03,300 --> 00:05:05,920 See? This scam's been in the newspapers all week. 67 00:05:06,160 --> 00:05:07,210 A marble? 68 00:05:07,340 --> 00:05:11,499 Why, if this is true, then that means I've been... You've been stung, you've 69 00:05:11,500 --> 00:05:14,810 been ripped off, you've been beaten, whatever you want to call it. 70 00:05:16,220 --> 00:05:17,820 I've been taken to the cleaners. 71 00:05:18,120 --> 00:05:19,440 Now I wouldn't call it that. 72 00:05:22,920 --> 00:05:24,240 What is wrong with you? 73 00:05:24,241 --> 00:05:26,059 You never used to be this big a thugger before. 74 00:05:26,060 --> 00:05:29,020 Oh, well, I guess I just had a temporary lapse of judgment. 75 00:05:29,300 --> 00:05:30,860 In other words, it was just dumb. 76 00:05:30,861 --> 00:05:35,639 Well, all right, I'll give you that, George. But at least give me some 77 00:05:35,640 --> 00:05:36,479 too. For what? 78 00:05:36,480 --> 00:05:39,219 You should have enough sense not to buy nothing from somebody over the street. 79 00:05:39,220 --> 00:05:42,499 Oh, come on, now. You act as if I did that all the time. If it happened once, 80 00:05:42,500 --> 00:05:45,139 could happen again. Well, I wasn't thinking clearly. I was worried about 81 00:05:45,140 --> 00:05:48,319 house in Cape Cod, and I had a lot on my mind. Okay, okay, I'm through with it. 82 00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:49,370 Well, thank you. 83 00:05:50,090 --> 00:05:54,709 Oh, listen, George, since we're on the subject of rings, would you mind 84 00:05:54,710 --> 00:05:56,310 appraising these other three? 85 00:05:57,290 --> 00:06:03,029 I'm telling you, Old Wes was the biggest coward in the whole Navy. Oh, come on, 86 00:06:03,030 --> 00:06:07,329 George. I'm telling you, he was so scared, when he found out they sent only 87 00:06:07,330 --> 00:06:11,090 black guys to the galley, he swore under oath that he was a mulatto. 88 00:06:13,050 --> 00:06:17,350 He even told them he sang with the ink spots, right? Oh, that's a lie. No, no, 89 00:06:17,370 --> 00:06:18,420 no. 90 00:06:18,640 --> 00:06:19,960 We're some Mills brothers. 91 00:06:19,961 --> 00:06:25,139 See, he did that to keep him going through the front line with you. I'm 92 00:06:25,140 --> 00:06:27,339 you, he was the scariest guy in the whole Navy. 93 00:06:27,340 --> 00:06:31,159 Hey, hey, listen, speaking of the Navy, now ain't it about time we headed down 94 00:06:31,160 --> 00:06:33,210 to the hotel? Hey, hey, let's keep going. 95 00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:34,490 Hey, hey, hey. 96 00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:41,559 No, no, we're just going to the hotel now. Come on. Oh, great. Let's get it 97 00:06:41,560 --> 00:06:43,380 with. Oh, I mean, let's go. 98 00:06:43,900 --> 00:06:45,020 I'll get my coat. 99 00:06:45,320 --> 00:06:47,060 Don't slam the closet door too loud. 100 00:06:47,660 --> 00:06:49,640 Old West might surrender to the Koreans. 101 00:06:52,260 --> 00:06:53,480 George, what is this? 102 00:06:53,481 --> 00:06:54,419 Oh, that? 103 00:06:54,420 --> 00:06:56,260 Man, you want to hear a great story? 104 00:06:56,261 --> 00:06:59,659 This friend of mine got ripped off over that ring because he thought it was the 105 00:06:59,660 --> 00:07:00,759 real Opal or something. 106 00:07:00,760 --> 00:07:01,599 It's a marble. 107 00:07:01,600 --> 00:07:02,650 Yeah, I know. 108 00:07:02,651 --> 00:07:05,719 But could you imagine a grown man falling for a gag like that? 109 00:07:05,720 --> 00:07:07,979 I don't know, Jefferson. It happens all the time. 110 00:07:07,980 --> 00:07:10,059 I know, but I didn't think it would happen to this guy. I mean, he's kind of 111 00:07:10,060 --> 00:07:12,959 smart, you know. But, of course, he told me that he was under some kind of 112 00:07:12,960 --> 00:07:14,010 stress. Why? 113 00:07:14,120 --> 00:07:16,890 Well, he's trying to buy some real estate up in Cape Cod. 114 00:07:17,240 --> 00:07:20,850 Well, he'll get over it. I mean, he's eating wax fruit and pulled through. 115 00:07:22,480 --> 00:07:26,419 Well, if I were you, I'd make sure to warn him. You know what kind of people 116 00:07:26,420 --> 00:07:28,339 out there these days. It ain't my problem. 117 00:07:28,340 --> 00:07:33,239 Oh, sure, it's nobody's problem now, but you might want to cut it off before it 118 00:07:33,240 --> 00:07:35,779 becomes a problem. What are you getting at, Tyndall? 119 00:07:35,780 --> 00:07:36,830 Nothing much. 120 00:07:37,320 --> 00:07:41,319 But I had a friend a couple of years ago get ripped off, and I had a chance to 121 00:07:41,320 --> 00:07:45,100 warn him, too. And I didn't. I felt real bad about it afterwards. 122 00:07:45,680 --> 00:07:47,120 Willis is my best friend, too. 123 00:07:47,300 --> 00:07:48,350 Look, 124 00:07:48,351 --> 00:07:51,159 you guys ain't gonna spread this around, are you? What, about the ring? 125 00:07:51,160 --> 00:07:52,540 No, that he's my best friend. 126 00:07:55,420 --> 00:07:56,720 Don't sweat it, George. 127 00:07:57,860 --> 00:07:59,340 Hey, I got an idea. 128 00:07:59,820 --> 00:08:05,680 Since he is your best friend, maybe Wes and me could teach him a lesson. 129 00:08:05,940 --> 00:08:08,180 Warn him for you. Run a game down on him. 130 00:08:08,820 --> 00:08:11,360 Run a game on Willis? Yeah, for his own good. 131 00:08:11,700 --> 00:08:14,720 All right, wait a minute. We could run something like... 132 00:08:15,530 --> 00:08:16,610 The pigeon drop. 133 00:08:16,870 --> 00:08:18,250 A pigeon drop? 134 00:08:18,630 --> 00:08:19,990 You know, a pigeon drop? 135 00:08:20,250 --> 00:08:22,310 The old pigeon drop? Yeah. 136 00:08:24,830 --> 00:08:25,880 What is it? 137 00:08:28,030 --> 00:08:29,610 I meet up with him someplace. 138 00:08:29,990 --> 00:08:31,570 I strike up a conversation. 139 00:08:31,571 --> 00:08:35,908 And while he's not looking, I drop an envelope filled with cut -up newspaper, 140 00:08:35,909 --> 00:08:39,090 which I pretend is a lot of money I just found. 141 00:08:40,150 --> 00:08:43,669 Well, I'm real nervous about it. 142 00:08:44,430 --> 00:08:49,189 But I say to him, now, if we can just find some way to keep this bread, I'd be 143 00:08:49,190 --> 00:08:52,809 more than willing to split it with him. Yeah, that's when I show up like a total 144 00:08:52,810 --> 00:08:55,870 stranger. And Tyndall will ask me what I think he should do. 145 00:08:56,190 --> 00:09:01,229 I tell him, well, I'll call a lawyer friend of mine. So I go into a phone 146 00:09:01,230 --> 00:09:03,890 and piddle around for two minutes and come back. 147 00:09:04,190 --> 00:09:08,690 And I say, legally, the money has to be documented. 148 00:09:09,820 --> 00:09:15,559 and put in a safe deposit box for 30 days. After that, I tell your friend, 149 00:09:15,560 --> 00:09:17,360 money can be split up any way he wants. 150 00:09:18,200 --> 00:09:19,500 What kind of scam is that? 151 00:09:19,740 --> 00:09:24,359 Oh, hey, the scam comes in when Wes's lawyer also says that we all have to 152 00:09:24,360 --> 00:09:26,980 up with equal shares of good faith money. 153 00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:31,159 Well, that's to show that we all have enough money to live on and nobody's 154 00:09:31,160 --> 00:09:35,339 to take anything out of the bank before the 30 days are up. But, see, me and 155 00:09:35,340 --> 00:09:38,480 Tyndall will just pretend to come up with our good faith money. 156 00:09:38,880 --> 00:09:42,539 But your friend will come up with a real thing. And we'll put it in one 157 00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:48,479 envelope. And then, when he's not looking, we'll switch the envelopes. 158 00:09:48,480 --> 00:09:49,479 with a dummy envelope. 159 00:09:49,480 --> 00:09:51,860 And send him off to the phony lawyer with it. 160 00:09:52,320 --> 00:09:55,960 And then bring the real envelope with the money in it back to you. Right. 161 00:09:56,200 --> 00:10:00,819 And while you're rubbing his face at it, me and Wes will be on our way to Los 162 00:10:00,820 --> 00:10:01,870 Angeles. 163 00:10:02,430 --> 00:10:03,480 That's it? 164 00:10:03,610 --> 00:10:06,200 Man, Willis will smell that kind of game a mile away. 165 00:10:06,750 --> 00:10:09,090 Ten bucks says he won't. Ten bucks says he will. 166 00:10:09,690 --> 00:10:10,740 I'll hold the money. 167 00:10:11,110 --> 00:10:13,580 Who'd ever fall for that good faith money stuff? 168 00:10:13,630 --> 00:10:15,470 Same person who'd buy half a marble. 169 00:10:15,471 --> 00:10:21,109 Besides, if he doesn't go for it, you know he's not so easy and you don't have 170 00:10:21,110 --> 00:10:24,089 to worry about him, right? Look, I'm telling you, I've known Willis for ten 171 00:10:24,090 --> 00:10:27,640 years. There's no way he's going to go for this pitch and drop stuff, man. 172 00:10:27,670 --> 00:10:30,450 No way. Not a chance. Not a chance in a million years. 173 00:10:31,229 --> 00:10:36,869 So, after I picked up my good faith money, the man gave me the address of 174 00:10:36,870 --> 00:10:39,750 lawyer and trusted me to carry this over there. 175 00:10:39,751 --> 00:10:43,109 So that's where you're on your way now, to take the good faith money over to the 176 00:10:43,110 --> 00:10:44,270 lawyer. Exactly. 177 00:10:44,970 --> 00:10:49,289 And that way the lawyer can see it and know that none of us are going to bother 178 00:10:49,290 --> 00:10:53,989 the found money. You amaze me, Willis. This is absolutely, without a shadow of 179 00:10:53,990 --> 00:10:57,600 doubt, the stupidest thing you have ever done in your whole stupid life. 180 00:10:57,601 --> 00:11:01,969 You think I should have gone straight to the lawyers, didn't you? I'm not 181 00:11:01,970 --> 00:11:03,290 talking about the lawyers. 182 00:11:03,350 --> 00:11:04,490 There ain't no lawyers. 183 00:11:04,491 --> 00:11:08,489 No lawyers, but they said that... Look, forget what they said. Just open the 184 00:11:08,490 --> 00:11:09,529 envelope and look inside. 185 00:11:09,530 --> 00:11:13,149 What? Open it. You can seal it back when you finish it. Open it and see what's 186 00:11:13,150 --> 00:11:17,330 inside. All right, I'll be glad to. I know what's inside. My money is in here. 187 00:11:17,970 --> 00:11:19,470 Wait a minute, it's not in here. 188 00:11:19,471 --> 00:11:22,169 There's nothing but newspaper here. There's been some mistake. 189 00:11:22,170 --> 00:11:23,220 No, there wasn't. 190 00:11:23,221 --> 00:11:26,489 They gave you the wrong envelope on purpose. 191 00:11:26,490 --> 00:11:27,540 You want to know why? 192 00:11:27,680 --> 00:11:30,390 Well, yes, wouldn't you, if you were in my situation? 193 00:11:30,840 --> 00:11:33,440 Because I got the real envelope. 194 00:11:34,060 --> 00:11:37,490 Those two guys you met were friends of mine. The whole thing was a scam. 195 00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:43,539 Oh, my God. Look, Willis, I'm sorry. I mean, I didn't think you'd fall for 196 00:11:43,540 --> 00:11:44,590 something like this. 197 00:11:44,600 --> 00:11:46,770 I just did it because you're my best friend. 198 00:11:46,771 --> 00:11:50,539 Look, if this has taught you to be more careful with your money, I'd be glad to 199 00:11:50,540 --> 00:11:51,860 do it all over again, okay? 200 00:11:52,740 --> 00:11:53,790 I'll get your money. 201 00:11:54,720 --> 00:11:55,840 Oh, uh, George. 202 00:11:56,460 --> 00:12:00,499 Yeah. Uh, you're not going to tell anybody else about this, are you? Are 203 00:12:00,500 --> 00:12:04,110 kidding? I don't want everybody to know that I have an idiot for a friend. 204 00:12:05,080 --> 00:12:06,200 Well, thanks, George. 205 00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:09,900 Because if I'd lost that money, Helen would have killed me. 206 00:12:10,320 --> 00:12:12,780 Friends? Uh, friends. 207 00:12:14,020 --> 00:12:16,540 Here, be more careful next time, okay? Oh. 208 00:12:17,620 --> 00:12:19,780 You see, Willis, I grew up in the street. 209 00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:23,320 So maybe it's easier for me. I can spot a con, see? 210 00:12:23,540 --> 00:12:24,590 And you know how? 211 00:12:24,640 --> 00:12:25,780 I watch people. 212 00:12:25,781 --> 00:12:29,739 If you watch people carefully enough, a con will stick up just like a sore 213 00:12:29,740 --> 00:12:30,759 thumb. 214 00:12:30,760 --> 00:12:34,310 It all boils down to knowing who to trust and who not to trust. That's all. 215 00:12:36,880 --> 00:12:39,230 You know all about it, don't you? That's right. 216 00:12:42,220 --> 00:12:45,020 Then why is this envelope full of newspaper, too? 217 00:12:59,980 --> 00:13:03,939 You see, down at Bunko, one of the biggest problems we face in something 218 00:13:03,940 --> 00:13:07,550 the pigeon drop is the reluctance of the victim to even report the crime. 219 00:13:07,551 --> 00:13:10,999 I guess they think we just stand around the squad room and make fun of what 220 00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:14,320 happened. But con games are no laughing matter to us. 221 00:13:14,700 --> 00:13:18,959 I just wanted to explain that so you can rest assured that we take these things 222 00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:22,320 every bit as personally and as seriously as you do. 223 00:13:22,620 --> 00:13:25,120 Well, thanks a lot, officer. No, no problem. 224 00:13:25,860 --> 00:13:29,420 Now, just what is your relationship with the fish here? 225 00:13:32,390 --> 00:13:33,440 Best friend. 226 00:13:33,490 --> 00:13:36,510 Huh. Well, I'll just put down something general. 227 00:13:36,830 --> 00:13:38,750 Any objections to know the guy? 228 00:13:38,751 --> 00:13:42,989 Listen, officer, we've already told you everything we know about the two crooks. 229 00:13:42,990 --> 00:13:45,940 You don't seem to understand. I need to have that money back. 230 00:13:45,990 --> 00:13:50,129 Mr. Willard, any time something like this goes down, we're automatically 231 00:13:50,130 --> 00:13:51,450 major complications here. 232 00:13:51,990 --> 00:13:54,050 You see, I know you know the two guys. 233 00:13:54,370 --> 00:13:55,970 You know you know the two guys. 234 00:13:56,720 --> 00:13:59,130 But the judge don't know, you know, the two guys. 235 00:13:59,280 --> 00:14:00,480 But they've got my money. 236 00:14:00,740 --> 00:14:01,960 I know it's your money. 237 00:14:02,520 --> 00:14:03,720 You know it's your money. 238 00:14:04,660 --> 00:14:06,710 But the judge don't know it's your money. 239 00:14:07,640 --> 00:14:10,710 You see what I'm trying to get at? Yes, you've got a dumb judge. 240 00:14:10,711 --> 00:14:12,499 Wait a second. 241 00:14:12,500 --> 00:14:15,439 You mean to tell me that even if they catch West and Tyndall, there's no 242 00:14:15,440 --> 00:14:17,219 guarantee that Willis can get his money back? 243 00:14:17,220 --> 00:14:18,270 You a Mets fan? 244 00:14:18,740 --> 00:14:20,790 Yeah. Then you can take this appointment. 245 00:14:22,120 --> 00:14:23,600 I doubt it very seriously. 246 00:14:24,330 --> 00:14:25,470 But we'll do what we can. 247 00:14:25,610 --> 00:14:26,690 Oh, yeah, sure. 248 00:14:27,090 --> 00:14:29,810 Hey, once in a while, these con guys slip up, you know? 249 00:14:30,030 --> 00:14:35,009 Oh? As a matter of fact, I busted a guy last night trying to sell me a half a 250 00:14:35,010 --> 00:14:36,270 marble glued to some ring. 251 00:14:39,770 --> 00:14:42,250 You wouldn't believe what some people fall for. 252 00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:58,740 another adventure home, old buddy. 253 00:14:58,960 --> 00:15:00,880 Well, let's see what's good on the tube. 254 00:15:00,881 --> 00:15:05,059 George, do you know what Helen is going to do to me when she finds out about 255 00:15:05,060 --> 00:15:07,939 this? Don't worry about it, Willis. There's a bright side to everything. 256 00:15:07,940 --> 00:15:10,350 Oh, and tell me, what is the bright side to this? 257 00:15:10,440 --> 00:15:14,520 Okay, you're broke now, so if she sues you for alimony, you get off scot -free. 258 00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:18,980 How can you sit there making jokes? 259 00:15:18,981 --> 00:15:22,099 None of this would have happened if you just minded your own business. 260 00:15:22,100 --> 00:15:23,150 All right, all right. 261 00:15:23,151 --> 00:15:26,339 She'll never have to know. Well, how do you propose to keep it a secret? 262 00:15:26,340 --> 00:15:27,390 Simple. 263 00:15:27,440 --> 00:15:29,910 I'll just write you a check for the money you lost. 264 00:15:30,500 --> 00:15:31,550 Okay? 265 00:15:32,060 --> 00:15:33,620 All right. 266 00:15:34,300 --> 00:15:35,350 How much is it? 267 00:15:35,520 --> 00:15:36,570 Fifteen. 268 00:15:36,571 --> 00:15:39,359 Fifteen hundred dollars. Well, how could you be so stupid? 269 00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:42,300 Oh, never mind, never mind. It's my fault, my fault. 270 00:15:42,940 --> 00:15:48,119 Oh, uh, uh, wait a minute, George. It wasn't fifteen hundred. It was fifteen 271 00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:49,170 thousand. 272 00:15:53,060 --> 00:15:54,320 George, you stop writing. 273 00:16:06,600 --> 00:16:10,100 you'd trust a total stranger with $15 ,000. 274 00:16:10,740 --> 00:16:14,800 Oh, well, now that the money's gone, I might as well tell you the whole story. 275 00:16:15,780 --> 00:16:18,380 You'll only read it in my obituary tomorrow anyway. 276 00:16:18,381 --> 00:16:22,859 You see, that money was the money that Helen and I had been saving for the 277 00:16:22,860 --> 00:16:24,519 house. Oh, so there goes the beach house. 278 00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:28,239 Yeah, well, actually, we'd been saving for it for six years, but, well, the 279 00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:31,139 development was delayed. We were put on a waiting list, and then suddenly last 280 00:16:31,140 --> 00:16:34,099 month, a real estate man called me and told me the house was now available. 281 00:16:34,100 --> 00:16:35,180 Oh, I didn't know that. 282 00:16:35,181 --> 00:16:38,789 Oh, and neither does Helen, and I didn't tell her either, because, well, you 283 00:16:38,790 --> 00:16:43,429 see, over the last couple of years, I've been drawing a little money out of the 284 00:16:43,430 --> 00:16:47,490 account. Uh -huh. Oh, well, now, wait a minute. Not much, you know, $20 here, 285 00:16:47,810 --> 00:16:51,030 $50 there, but I never paid it back. 286 00:16:51,031 --> 00:16:55,069 So when the house became available, I suddenly found myself very short. And 287 00:16:55,070 --> 00:16:59,390 that's why this found money seemed like such a good deal to me. 288 00:16:59,391 --> 00:17:02,559 So how long do you have before you have to make the down payment? 289 00:17:02,560 --> 00:17:03,610 60 days. 290 00:17:03,611 --> 00:17:07,318 With the new money, I figured that would give me plenty of time. And that way, 291 00:17:07,319 --> 00:17:10,019 Helen would never find out anything about it. Then we're going to have to 292 00:17:10,020 --> 00:17:11,919 the money back ourselves, Willis. But how? 293 00:17:11,920 --> 00:17:14,990 The same way they got it from us. We're going to have to con them. 294 00:17:15,220 --> 00:17:19,019 We'll just have to track those guys down and pull a con on them that they'll 295 00:17:19,020 --> 00:17:19,779 never forget. 296 00:17:19,780 --> 00:17:20,759 Oh, I don't know. 297 00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:23,159 Will you come on, man? We've got to fight fire with fire. 298 00:17:23,160 --> 00:17:26,739 They conned us, right? We conned them. They were determined, we're determined. 299 00:17:26,740 --> 00:17:30,290 They knew what they wanted, we know what we want. They were smart, so am I. 300 00:17:36,270 --> 00:17:39,630 Well, that's very intriguing, George, but you forgot one thing. 301 00:17:39,870 --> 00:17:44,469 What's that? We don't know anything about con games, except, of course, the 302 00:17:44,470 --> 00:17:45,520 pigeon drop. 303 00:17:46,550 --> 00:17:48,900 Why ain't nobody dumb enough to fall for that? 304 00:17:51,550 --> 00:17:53,780 I know a guy. I still got his phone number, too. 305 00:17:53,990 --> 00:17:56,790 And this guy knows every con there ever was, you know? 306 00:17:56,791 --> 00:17:59,739 In fact, he's so good, he got me once. So you know he must be pretty good, 307 00:17:59,740 --> 00:18:00,790 right? 308 00:18:00,791 --> 00:18:04,679 Well, what makes you think he'd be willing to help us? Well, he owes me, he 309 00:18:04,680 --> 00:18:06,730 knows me, and most of all, he respects me. 310 00:18:19,380 --> 00:18:22,660 George, George, he's been doing this for several minutes now. 311 00:18:24,940 --> 00:18:26,800 Do you think we ought to call someone? 312 00:18:26,820 --> 00:18:28,600 Come on, Jimmy. 313 00:18:29,060 --> 00:18:31,400 I'm sorry, man. 314 00:18:31,980 --> 00:18:37,099 But just the thought of you two falling for something as lame as the old pigeon 315 00:18:37,100 --> 00:18:38,150 drop. 316 00:18:38,740 --> 00:18:40,860 But I guess it could happen to anybody. 317 00:18:41,260 --> 00:18:44,460 Oh, really? I don't believe it. He fell for that one, too? 318 00:18:46,440 --> 00:18:47,490 Look, Jimmy. 319 00:18:47,860 --> 00:18:49,500 Now, you owe me a favor. 320 00:18:49,501 --> 00:18:53,379 Remember, I loaned you that $10 ,000 that time for school, didn't I? Hey, 321 00:18:53,380 --> 00:18:55,310 not fair. Man, I ripped you off for that. 322 00:18:55,311 --> 00:18:59,939 Listen, Jimmy, anything you could do, I'd really appreciate. You see, if my 323 00:18:59,940 --> 00:19:02,060 finds out about that... Hey, man, relax. 324 00:19:02,061 --> 00:19:05,919 How is your wife going to find out? She doesn't even know that the house came 325 00:19:05,920 --> 00:19:06,799 through yet. 326 00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:10,260 Plus, you got a 60 -day extension on your down payment date. 327 00:19:10,540 --> 00:19:14,140 Hell, man, I can sell the Surgeon General a carton of cigarettes in 60 328 00:19:15,980 --> 00:19:17,060 Hey, that's right. 329 00:19:17,320 --> 00:19:20,150 Oh, this is wonderful. We don't have to worry about Helen. 330 00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:25,020 Oh, Tom, the house on Cape Cod just came through. 331 00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:28,880 Isn't that wonderful, George? 332 00:19:29,540 --> 00:19:33,040 Yes, well... All right, Jimmy, what are you doing here? 333 00:19:33,400 --> 00:19:36,720 Uh, I'm back in college working on another degree. 334 00:19:37,300 --> 00:19:41,999 And, uh, I was having a few problems, so I figured I'd get some help from Dad 335 00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:43,050 and Uncle Tom. 336 00:19:47,530 --> 00:19:48,590 Yes, that's right. 337 00:19:49,350 --> 00:19:51,830 Really? What are you studying now? 338 00:19:52,630 --> 00:19:53,680 Biology. 339 00:19:54,510 --> 00:19:57,750 Of course, of course. It's math and biology. 340 00:19:58,370 --> 00:20:00,410 It's the science of counting animals. 341 00:20:02,650 --> 00:20:07,349 Anyway, I am so excited about the house, and I wouldn't have known a thing if it 342 00:20:07,350 --> 00:20:08,400 wasn't for Louise. 343 00:20:08,590 --> 00:20:12,510 She suggested that I stop sitting around and to call the broker, so I did. 344 00:20:12,511 --> 00:20:13,749 And guess what? 345 00:20:13,750 --> 00:20:15,070 The house came through. 346 00:20:15,370 --> 00:20:16,420 Yes. 347 00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:18,940 Oh, so this is all you're doing, Louise? 348 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:23,320 Well, I know I shouldn't take all the credit. 349 00:20:23,940 --> 00:20:26,960 Oh, what the heck. There's just no way around it. 350 00:20:28,920 --> 00:20:30,960 Oh, but I haven't told you the best part. 351 00:20:31,320 --> 00:20:33,800 Oh, you mean there's more. 352 00:20:34,260 --> 00:20:35,310 Mm -hmm. 353 00:20:35,580 --> 00:20:41,120 I told the real estate agent that we would bring him the down payment on 354 00:20:43,340 --> 00:20:44,390 Monday. 355 00:20:48,330 --> 00:20:49,380 Oh, Tom. 356 00:20:50,130 --> 00:20:53,130 I'm so sorry, but he couldn't do it any sooner. 357 00:20:53,850 --> 00:20:58,170 Are you upset, Puddin'? Nah. 358 00:21:04,190 --> 00:21:09,749 Oh, come on, Helen. I still got magazines from when we redecorated. 359 00:21:09,750 --> 00:21:10,800 to get some ideas. 360 00:21:12,650 --> 00:21:13,700 Okay. 361 00:21:17,960 --> 00:21:22,059 Just think that in no time at all, we'll be hearing the gentle sounds of the 362 00:21:22,060 --> 00:21:26,139 Atlantic lapping at our doorsteps while the seagulls perch on a brand new 363 00:21:26,140 --> 00:21:30,359 mailbox that reads, Property of Tom and Helen Willis. Oh, honey, isn't that 364 00:21:30,360 --> 00:21:31,840 wonderful? Fabulous! 365 00:21:35,100 --> 00:21:42,079 The only perched bird 366 00:21:42,080 --> 00:21:43,180 I see is a buzzard. 367 00:21:45,640 --> 00:21:48,760 Sitting on a tombstone that reads, here lies Tom Willis. 368 00:21:49,220 --> 00:21:53,899 Oh, but there's a P .S. that says, see the back of this marker for directions 369 00:21:53,900 --> 00:21:56,140 the gravesite of George Jefferson. 370 00:21:57,500 --> 00:21:58,550 Oh, 371 00:21:59,400 --> 00:22:02,620 relax. Come on. Look, you gotta help my man here. 372 00:22:05,100 --> 00:22:09,859 But Monday is five days away. I can't work that fast. Oh, no. Come on, come 373 00:22:09,860 --> 00:22:12,000 look. My man needs his money. He needs it now. 374 00:22:12,360 --> 00:22:14,480 Look, blow your nose, Willis. 375 00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:17,440 Relax, relax, relax. 376 00:22:17,860 --> 00:22:20,990 Come on, look, you gotta help us run a con game on West Nintendo. 377 00:22:20,991 --> 00:22:22,579 You gotta think of something. 378 00:22:22,580 --> 00:22:27,000 Yeah, but Mr. Jefferson, the truth is I don't know that much about con games. 379 00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:28,210 What? 380 00:22:28,960 --> 00:22:30,560 The pigeon drop, sure. 381 00:22:31,120 --> 00:22:33,420 The Spanish prisoner, of course. 382 00:22:33,640 --> 00:22:37,760 The Baltimore bounce, the magic wallet, and the Kansas City loop, yeah. 383 00:22:39,160 --> 00:22:43,420 But if you want to run a real game, you ought to get yourself an expert. 384 00:22:43,840 --> 00:22:48,920 And I can't think of a single person, Mr. Jefferson, who fits that 385 00:22:49,560 --> 00:22:51,420 There's 500 bucks in it for you. 386 00:22:51,740 --> 00:22:53,420 I just thought of somebody. 387 00:22:55,440 --> 00:23:00,889 Figures. No, no, man, really. See, up until the time that you just said five, 388 00:23:00,890 --> 00:23:02,430 had forgotten all about it. Oh. 389 00:23:02,950 --> 00:23:07,410 But then it dawned on me that his phone number starts with a five, right? 390 00:23:07,650 --> 00:23:09,370 And from there, the rest is easy. 391 00:23:09,630 --> 00:23:13,210 You did say five, didn't you? Yes, I did. Yeah, that's him, all right. 392 00:23:15,030 --> 00:23:16,970 May I use your phone? Be my guest. 393 00:23:17,670 --> 00:23:18,720 Oh. 394 00:23:18,830 --> 00:23:19,880 Hey. 395 00:23:21,560 --> 00:23:25,110 You say that this Western tenderly headed back to Los Angeles, right? 396 00:23:25,300 --> 00:23:31,919 Perfect. Because my man lived in L .A., and if anyone can find him, wherever 397 00:23:31,920 --> 00:23:34,580 they are, he can. 398 00:23:34,971 --> 00:23:37,059 Who is he? 399 00:23:37,060 --> 00:23:38,110 My cousin. 400 00:23:39,300 --> 00:23:40,720 Oh, your cousin. 401 00:23:40,920 --> 00:23:43,510 What happened? You couldn't find your Aunt Effie? 402 00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:46,520 No, man, really. Hey, he's heavy duty. 403 00:23:46,960 --> 00:23:51,240 Oh, sure he is Has he had any experience in this field at all? 404 00:23:51,440 --> 00:23:52,780 Oh, you might say that 405 00:23:52,830 --> 00:23:57,380 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 34791

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