Original subtitles

Well, we're moving on now. We're moving on now.

What do you think a little Jimmy will like? The rocket ship or the clowns?

Oh, gee, I don't know.

It's hard for me to think like a 12 -year -old.

What do you think, George?

Let's see.

Plane sheets. If he's going to be hanging around with me, he's got to act

grown -up.

Florence, get off the basketball court.

I'm coming in for a hoop.

Please.

Hey, that was good, Mr. Jefferson. You look just like the doc.

You mean Julius Irving?

No, you know, that other doc.

Sleepy, grumpy, and dopey's friend.

George, I can't believe it.

After ten years, we are finally getting to meet our little foster son.

Yeah, I can't wait. I'm looking forward to it.

Somebody to take for walks, go to the movies, go to the park with. You know,

could do those things with me.

Yeah, but it wouldn't be fun.

George, it is really nice of you to take a couple of days off to play with

little Jimmy.

Yeah, well, like I said, Luigi, I've been looking forward to this.

That's why I canceled all my appointments. I got one meeting this

a Mr. Carlisle.

Do you have to keep it?

Well, he's got a 12 -year -old son. I figured him and Jimmy could be friends.

Oh, that's so sweet of you, George.

Well, you know, I kind of played up the game about Jimmy. Of course, like,

Carlisle is so desperate for a playmate for his son.

And, you know, business is a business.

And that's so you of you, George.

Come on, let's get going. It's time to get started for the airport.

Weezy, it's only 12 .10. The plane won't even get in from Atlanta till 5 o

'clock.

Haven't you ever heard of tailwinds?

Oh, that's him. Oh.

Oh.

I was hoping you would be someone else.

May we come in, Louise?

It's embarrassing out here in the hall.

Come on in, you two.

Well, thanks a lot, Helen.

You know, when you're in the shower, you never hear me complaining about your

Sarah Vaughan. That's because my Sarah Vaughan sounds like Sarah Hall.

Listen.

Look at me.

I'm as helpless as a kitten up a tree.

It does sound like Sarah Vaughan.

Yeah, doing Lionel Barrymore. Hey,

Willis, how about a quick game one -on -one? Oh, I'd like to, George, but I'd

rather not. You see, I'm wearing a new sweatsuit, and I don't want to sweat in

it.

Louise, Tom and I are going bike riding in the park, and we came down to invite

you two to join us.

Oh, I'm sorry, but George and I are expecting our little boy this afternoon.

Oh, really?

Well, correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't Lionel a little old for Dennis the

Dumpy Dump Truck?

It's not for Lionel. His name is Jimmy. He's a foster kid me and Weezy have been

sponsoring. He's coming here? Why didn't you tell us? Because it's none of your

business.

Anyway, he's going to be spending all of his time with me.

Well, that's being a little rough on the kid, don't you think?

I can't believe he's actually coming. I can still see his picture in that ad we

answered. Oh, he was such a cutie. Couldn't have been more than two years

All eyes and so sad.

Yeah, who could resist a face like that?

And old Weezy started sending him $10 a month.

Oh, that's nice.

And when we started getting successful, I started sending him more money.

You know, it's a special feeling, giving to someone who really needs it.

Oh, I'm glad to hear that, because, you know, I really need a video recorder.

See that, Weed? You spoiled my surprise.

You got me a video recorder?

Nope, but I wasn't going to tell you about it until later.

Louise, is Jimmy looking forward to meeting George, or have you warned him

advance?

Well, actually, he knows all about us. We have been corresponding with Jimmy

ever since he could write.

It was like watching him grow.

He even sent me the first little tooth he lost.

It was so sad. He said he put it under his pillow, but the tooth fairy never

came.

So we sent him $100.

$100?

Where are the pliers?

So this will be the first time you've ever seen little Jimmy.

Uh -huh.

Last week, he wrote us telling us how much he'd love to come and see us. So we

sent him a plane ticket.

That's right. I'm gonna take him all around New York, show him all the

landmarks, you know, like Yankee Stadium, Metropolitan Museum, the

Cleaners.

Oh, lucky kid.

Hello. Here, Ralph.

You're kidding.

Hey, Weezy, Jimmy's here early. Oh, I knew it.

Tailwinds. Yeah, right, Ralph. Send him right up.

Yes, Jimmy actually is my son.

What do you mean, does Mr. Jefferson know?

No, I'm not going to give you $1 ,000.

And look, don't tell Jimmy none of that stuff about the pay elevator.

Oh, this is just great. He really must have been anxious to get here.

I wonder what he looks like. I'll bet he's cute.

Yeah, he looks like me.

Now, why should he look like you?

After all the money I shelled out for him, that's the least he could do.

Florence! Come on out, Jimmy!

Here, he's on his way up.

So, Miss Jefferson, I haven't had time to prepare lunch.

Good, then the odds are you'll stay.

That's it, I'll get it. Now, he'll probably be a little shy and nervous, so

let's make little Jimmy feel like one of the family.

to raise the basket, George.

What the hell's going on here? Oh, and you must be Dad.

Mom, he's every bit the little spitfire you said he was.

Oh, you're supposed to be Jimmy?

That's right.

Uh, I'll be in my room watching the news.

I have a feeling you're gonna be on it.

Um, uh, Tom, I've got a feeling we should be going.

Oh, really?

Mm -hmm. Well, hello.

Jimmy, Tom, Helen, bye.

Whatever your name is, I think you've got some explaining to do. Yes, you do.

What have you done with our son?

Well, okay, I guess I should let you folks in on a few things. As I said

I am Jimmy, but I've got a confession to make. I'm not 12.

No kidding.

Now, I've got three questions for you. Shoot.

Maybe later.

Number one, where the hell is my money?

Number two, why are you 40?

And number three, do you have good health insurance?

every one of them. Let's work backwards.

Yes, I have excellent health coverage thanks to your generosity, Mom.

Next, why am I 40? Because I was 39 last year.

And as for your money, well, that's a somewhat longer story. Yeah, well, I got

plenty of time. I ain't too sure about you.

Judge, I don't feel so good.

Now, you see, you've upset Mom.

You're stalling.

You're right. I guess I do owe you an explanation.

And several thousand dollars.

Okay. Here goes.

Now, ten years ago, I was a broke, 30 -year -old graduate student.

I didn't have parents.

I had used up my scholarship grant, and I was too busy studying to get a job.

So, I realize you're a little ahead of me here, but this is where you came in.

Please, do I still have my baseball bat?

It's in the closet. Good. Go on, Jim.

Well, it was a long shot, you see. I found this little skinny kid, I dressed

up in rags, and then I snapped his picture, and then I placed the ad in the

magazine, which I'm sure you've watched for this. I worded pretty touchingly.

Anyway, the magazine had a circulation of 16 million.

16 million people?

How many people fell for this? Just mom.

Oh, now that hurt. That hurt. See, I can account for every penny you've ever

sent me.

I haven't wasted one single solitary cent.

$10 ,000?

I didn't include the hundred for the tooth. I figured it was a gift.

I'm calling the cops.

George, wait.

I want to hear exactly what you did with our money.

Now, you know, it makes me feel really good that you feel comfortable enough to

ask.

This is where your money went.

M .A.

Sociology.

Ph .D. Philosophy.

And Ph .D. History.

George, Jimmy is smart.

Your son, the doctor.

Well, how do we know you didn't fake these?

Oh, trust me. I know I'm calling the cops.

Now, George, we can't do that. What do you mean we can't?

Because if we have him arrested, the story will get out, and every legitimate

charity will suffer.

And Lord knows they have a difficult enough time raising money as it is. Good

point, Mom.

So in other words, my $10 ,000 is out the window. So the least I can do is

Jimmy out there after, right? Open the door for me.

Can I please say something? You ain't got time.

Here is your $10 ,000.

Son!

Let me just ask you one favor. Anything.

Would you please lend me $10 ,000?

Wait a minute.

Let me get this straight.

Now, you rip me off of $10 ,000, then you give me the $10 ,000, expect me to

give it back to you?

Exactly. Then one of us is dumber than he looks, and I know it ain't me.

What my husband is trying to say is...

Goodbye. You haven't even heard what I want the money for.

Oh, well, let me guess.

You want to go back to school and get that one degree that you really deserve.

A B .S.

Now, you see, that really hurt. You see... The danger in being a charming,

affable, and, well, let's face it, mischievous guy like me is that, you

people don't take you seriously, so let's be straight with each other. You

I do volunteer work at this children's center, and I want you to just donate

money to them.

You hear that, weasel children?

Hey, let me guess where this center is, okay?

Uh, Paris, right?

And, of course, you want to deliver it there personally.

So what if we give you an extra $600 so you can fly first class?

Well, come on, wait a minute. You ain't taking this seriously.

He's probably got good intentions.

He probably wants to adopt some 20 -year -old orphan named Fifi.

You people really don't trust me, do you? I don't trust your pulse.

blame you for not trusting me just a little but this is all very easy to

out see the children's center is right here in new york you see you can't even

keep your lies straight you told us you came from atlanta oh yeah well now that

was a lie actually i'm a new yorker born and bred oh oh oh

by the way here's the plane ticket you sent me i couldn't get a flight out of

brooklyn so i decided to take the subway

Uh, wait a minute.

If you live here in New York, how did you get all that money we sent to

Oh, yeah, my brother lives down there. You see, you've been sending the money

him, and he's been forwarding it to me.

Yeah, he's really been a big help. You really would like him. I'd love for you

to meet him.

As a matter of fact, it was his tooth that you sent me the $100 for.

Well, you know, he lost it in a fight, and I just wanted to show him that every

cloud has a silver lining.

I can't believe you've been right here in New York all these years.

Amazing, ain't it?

How can you live with yourself?

Well, I'm a nice guy.

For instance, all of these years, I've been bringing my clothes to Jefferson

Cleaners. Now, the word on the street was, take your dirty clothes to

Cunningham.

I figured I'd, you know, keep it in the family. I figured it was the least I

could do.

You ever consider suicide?

Once, but then I got your first check.

Look, I brought the money back, didn't I? If I'd been really dishonest, I could

have kept on collecting from you until I was 21, which is 49 in Jimmy years.

Well, Jimmy, I'll tell you one thing.

You sure have changed my mind. You mean you're going to give me the money? No. I

mean, now I'm in favor of capital punishment.

Now, come on. You're being kind of hard on me, aren't you? I mean, I worked late

nights. I worked hard scraping up the money to pay you back.

And now you want this money back for the Children's Center?

Uh, that's right. Forget it. Look, I know you're a crook, and I know you've

some kind of angle.

Mr. Jefferson, people change.

Now, I admit, I started out thinking of you two as a gold mine. But every time I

got one of your checks, a letter from your wife came with it. So that's how I

started learning about her work with the help center and all the things that you

two are doing for the community.

And I want to say that you two people really touched me.

Well, you touched us pretty good, too.

Believe me, I felt bad about it, which is why I started doing volunteer work at

this children's home myself.

But now the place needs money, which is why I call this little family reunion.

Mom?

Well, Jimmy, I do know it's hard to raise money.

Why, just recently at the health center... Oh, I don't believe that

fallen for this.

Look at him. He ain't 12.

getting my $10 ,000.

Mr. Jefferson, I work for the Safe Harbor Center for Homeless Children on

Street. Why don't you just give him a call and check it out?

I'd like to do that. What good is it going to do? Okay, you call his brother

answers.

He mumbles something because he sold all his teeth.

Then the two of them take our $10 ,000 and hop a plane to Rio.

Wouldn't hurt to call, George. Wheezy, you're wasting your time.

What? You wouldn't know a con game if it jumped up and bit you.

Jefferson, how are you?

Oh, Mr.

Carlisle, you're early. I know, but I just couldn't wait to meet your little

boy. Is he in?

No.

He went out to the store to have a T -shirt made with your son's name printed

it. But he doesn't even know what my son's name is. Oh, well, that's going to

take him longer, then.

Like father, like son.

Listen, I didn't think it would be a good idea to discuss business when our

met later, so I figured we could sign the contracts now.

Oh, give me a pen. Oh, and this must be your lovely wife. I guess. Give me a

pen. You, you are... Nobody. Give me a pen.

I could swear I've seen you someplace before.

Not if you still got your wallet in your pocket.

You sign right next to the X. I brought this for your little boy, but I guess

you've already got one, so you won't be needing it. Oh, no, that's okay. Me and

my wife can play full court.

This is your wife. I guess. Just sign right here.

Jefferson, you're acting strange today. What's going on?

What's going on? Nothing.

Well, Weezy, would you explain to him? No.

Well, you see, there's been a slight misunderstanding.

Okay. Now, Jimmy is not my real son.

He's my foster son. Oh, well, that's okay.

He'll still be able to play with my son.

See, that's another misunderstanding.

Because you probably thought that I said that he was here in New York.

But what I meant was he's there in Atlanta.

See how they sound alike?

Sound alike?

Oh, would you help me? No.

Jefferson, just because our kids were going to play together, that doesn't

that we have to do business.

Now, you've been acting really strange about this whole matter, and that

concerns me.

Look, all I'm trying to tell you is you can't be Jefferson Cleaners. I don't

know. Word on the street is, take your dirty clothes to Cunningham.

Look, I'll tell you, we do good work. And if it's a kid you've got to have,

sure me and Weasley can come up with one, right, Weas?

No.

Will you excuse me? I have to make a phone call. Let me have those contracts,

Jefferson. Frankly, I don't think this is going to work out. Excuse me, sir.

I believe that I can clear this up. And who are you?

The foster son.

At my age?

I'm J .W. Thomas, and I'm the liaison between the Jeffersons and their little

son, Jimmy.

Then there is a little Jimmy. Oh, definitely.

Well, I'm glad to hear that. I was beginning to think that Jefferson didn't

a foster son. Well, he certainly does, but unfortunately, the little rascal,

know, had an ear infection, so flying was out of the question, you know? And

came all the way from Atlanta to tell them that?

Oh, no, no, no. You see, I work for an orphanage here in New York, and they're

affiliated with the home in Atlanta, and they sent me over to be with the

Jeffersons during their moment of disappointment.

As you can see, it's been quite a blow.

Quite a blow.

We have a saying

at the Safe Harbor Center.

If you can't love a child, then that's no good.

That's where I've seen you be. for at the Safe Harbor Center for Homeless

Children. I adopted my little boy through your agency.

Time and again, your staff has thanked me for giving Todd a home. But actually,

I'm the one who must thank you.

He's really made my life complete.

I'm sorry he couldn't make it. You see, we just moved into the neighborhood. Now

my little boy won't have anyone to play with for a while.

Well, you know, I may be out of line for saying this, sir, but what the hey.

You know, if your son is anything like you, then he won't have any trouble

making friends, right?

Does he look like you?

People say so. Well, we can be sure that a lot of his friends are going to be

girls, huh?

Yeah.

Yeah. I guess.

Maybe I was worried about nothing.

I'm going to sign these contracts.

Oh.

Jefferson.

I misjudged you. Yeah, a lot of people do.

Well, I won't take up any more of your time.

Say goodbye to your lovely wife for me.

Nice meeting you.

Oh, and Jefferson, Jimmy's a very lucky kid to have a daddy like you.

I can vouch for that, sir.

Barber Center.

And Jimmy's been telling the truth.

He is for real.

Of course he is, Weezy. That's what we've been trying to tell you.

Uh, George, so what about the $10 ,000?

I mean, I know it's like found money, but we had intended it to go to charity

all along.

No, Weezy, I just can't do it.

doing my $10 ,000.

I just can't.

George.

Okay, you got it. You mean you're giving the money?

Yes. Dad!

More or less.

But we have to walk down there with you to watch the money change hands, you

know? Just a second.

Why didn't you just give this money to the children's home? You didn't have to

come to us. We would have never known.

Well, I kind of wanted it all out in the open so I could have a clear

conscience, you know? Why now?

Well, I'm thinking about, you know, going back to school.

Uh, theology.

Say, you know, the kids would really appreciate these toys.

Well, go ahead and take them. And basketball hoops. Everything. Take it.

it. And this coffee table would look great in my apartment.

Don't press your luck, son. You got it, Dad.

Hmm.

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