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Well, we're moving on up, moving on up,
to the sun, moving on up, to a
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deluxe apartment in the sky.
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pushy but you're the maid and you're
just sitting there reading i'm the
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00:01:31,580 --> 00:01:37,239
and i'm doing all the dusting now let me
ask you do you notice anything wrong
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00:01:37,240 --> 00:01:44,239
you missed a spot what miss jefferson my
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standards are high now if you're gonna
do my work for me at least do it right i
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mean really
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Florence, you cooking dinner tonight?
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Mm -hmm. Well, you better get started.
You only got six hours left to burn it
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00:01:59,340 --> 00:02:00,390
up.
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00:02:00,631 --> 00:02:06,839
Don't forget, George, you promised to
take Ralph to lunch today.
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00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:07,879
Oh, no.
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00:02:07,880 --> 00:02:10,940
A promise is a promise. You are not
going to weasel out of this.
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I ain't trying to weasel out of it.
Look, if he calls, just tell him I
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00:02:14,660 --> 00:02:17,970
Florence and they took me to the
hospital and had my toes uncurled.
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00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:25,039
Why don't you just tell Ralph that Mr.
Jefferson donated his body to science
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00:02:25,040 --> 00:02:27,060
they sent it back stamped reject?
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00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:35,980
George, Ralph has been looking forward
to this lunch. It's his own special day.
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00:02:36,380 --> 00:02:38,490
Look, you mean his own special
invention.
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00:02:38,820 --> 00:02:40,800
Who ever heard of National Dormant Day?
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00:02:41,080 --> 00:02:42,380
He probably made that up.
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00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:45,960
He didn't make it up. It's right there
on the calendar.
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00:02:45,961 --> 00:02:47,639
And who gave us the calendar?
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00:02:47,640 --> 00:02:49,260
It was a Christmas gift.
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00:02:50,560 --> 00:02:51,610
Some Ralph.
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00:02:52,920 --> 00:02:57,559
Forget it, Wheezy. Look, I don't want to
go. I ain't got nothing in common with
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00:02:57,560 --> 00:02:58,059
the man.
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00:02:58,060 --> 00:02:59,110
I don't answer doors.
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00:03:00,220 --> 00:03:01,270
I'll get it.
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00:03:03,371 --> 00:03:05,239
Oh, hi.
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00:03:05,240 --> 00:03:06,290
Out of my way, George.
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00:03:07,300 --> 00:03:08,800
What's wrong, Helen? It's Tom.
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00:03:09,120 --> 00:03:11,470
What, did you get the bill from his
diner club?
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00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:14,880
All Tom thinks about is himself.
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00:03:14,881 --> 00:03:18,699
When he comes home, all he wants to talk
about is his work. He never asks me
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00:03:18,700 --> 00:03:20,280
about what I do. What do you do?
37
00:03:21,220 --> 00:03:23,240
I work at the help center, George.
38
00:03:23,460 --> 00:03:25,810
Oh, ain't you involved in that thing,
Louise?
39
00:03:25,940 --> 00:03:28,760
Yes, George, for the last five years.
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00:03:29,120 --> 00:03:32,280
See, I thought I remembered that. See,
we communicate.
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00:03:34,740 --> 00:03:36,580
Louise, I'm so frustrated.
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00:03:36,581 --> 00:03:40,359
I've been trying to tell Tom about the
new project that I've been working on
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00:03:40,360 --> 00:03:42,600
lately. But it's a wonderful project.
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00:03:42,601 --> 00:03:44,079
I know.
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00:03:44,080 --> 00:03:46,040
But Tom doesn't seem interested at all.
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00:03:46,041 --> 00:03:49,719
When he comes home, all he wants to talk
about is that silly book that he's
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00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:51,980
working on, The Miracle of Snoring.
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00:03:52,661 --> 00:03:56,539
Oh, you think you've got problems, huh?
49
00:03:56,540 --> 00:03:59,860
I've got to have lunch today with Ralph
on National Doorman's Day.
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00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:02,160
Oh, this is National Doorman's Day?
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00:04:02,380 --> 00:04:05,380
On our calendars, not until next month.
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00:04:08,980 --> 00:04:10,080
You hear that, Weas?
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00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:11,820
I knew it was a racket.
54
00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:13,480
You're going, George.
55
00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:17,970
Listen, Helen, why don't we have a cup
of coffee and talk this over?
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00:04:18,060 --> 00:04:20,060
Oh, I can't, Louise. I'm running late.
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00:04:20,839 --> 00:04:25,919
Oh, by the way, if Tom asks, which he
won't, I'll be down at the help center
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00:04:25,920 --> 00:04:28,820
working on that new project that he's
not interested in.
59
00:04:29,240 --> 00:04:30,290
Who cares?
60
00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:36,300
Oh, George, your tie is loose.
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00:04:37,940 --> 00:04:38,990
Oh!
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00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:46,270
believe the way she acted? She deserves
to be married to Willis.
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00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:50,220
George, this is serious.
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00:04:51,760 --> 00:04:55,860
Helen's my best friend. I can't remember
the last time I saw her so upset.
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00:04:56,580 --> 00:04:59,300
Florence, did you hear what Helen just
said?
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00:04:59,940 --> 00:05:02,470
Mm -mm. I was in the kitchen minding my
own business.
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00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:08,619
Well, listen, George. But if Mr. Willis
don't start paying more attention to his
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00:05:08,620 --> 00:05:09,670
wife...
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00:05:12,160 --> 00:05:13,640
Marriage is all over.
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00:05:14,820 --> 00:05:17,160
I thought you were minding your own
business.
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00:05:17,520 --> 00:05:19,380
Well, I was till I heard the juicy part.
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00:05:19,381 --> 00:05:24,459
Now, let me tell you what I think. Of
course, now, I ain't never been married.
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00:05:24,460 --> 00:05:26,260
And you never will be if there's a God.
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00:05:27,840 --> 00:05:32,300
Oh, there's a God, all right. And you're
the way he celebrates April Fool's Day.
75
00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:38,560
Anyway, Miss Jefferson, one thing I do
know.
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00:05:38,840 --> 00:05:43,040
is that when a man stops paying
attention to his wife, it's all over.
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00:05:43,580 --> 00:05:44,630
You think so?
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00:05:44,760 --> 00:05:49,439
Yep. Just like my daddy used to say.
When a man stops paying attention to his
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00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:51,400
wife, it's all over.
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00:05:53,681 --> 00:05:56,579
Florence, that's the doorbell.
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00:05:56,580 --> 00:05:58,320
Yeah, somebody must have pushed it.
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00:06:05,360 --> 00:06:06,460
Hello, Mrs. Jefferson.
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00:06:06,860 --> 00:06:08,040
Oh, hello, Ralph.
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00:06:08,700 --> 00:06:09,750
Come in.
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00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:11,620
Greetings, Mr. Jefferson, sir.
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00:06:11,940 --> 00:06:14,360
I've been looking forward to this all
year.
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00:06:14,361 --> 00:06:17,199
Look, Ralph, unfortunately, I'm not
going to be able to celebrate National
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00:06:17,200 --> 00:06:18,250
Dormant's Day.
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00:06:18,251 --> 00:06:19,459
Why not?
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00:06:19,460 --> 00:06:20,600
Because I don't want to.
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00:06:22,080 --> 00:06:26,699
Well, I understand, sir. You don't want
to be seen with me. After all, you're a
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00:06:26,700 --> 00:06:31,300
rich, influential tenant, and I'm just a
lowly doormat. I mean, doorman.
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00:06:31,660 --> 00:06:34,190
No, no, Ralph, that's not it. That's all
right, sir.
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00:06:34,300 --> 00:06:37,440
Even the lowly groundhog has his
holiday, but...
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00:06:38,300 --> 00:06:39,640
Not Ralph Hart.
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00:06:40,200 --> 00:06:43,540
Well, at least now I know my place in
the universe.
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00:06:44,180 --> 00:06:46,580
Somewhere beneath rodent.
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00:06:48,140 --> 00:06:50,960
George, take him to lunch. Okay, okay.
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00:06:51,260 --> 00:06:54,920
Fine, sir. I thought we might try this
modest little French restaurant.
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00:06:54,921 --> 00:06:58,979
It's the perfect place to celebrate
National Doorman's Day. Oh, yeah, that
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00:06:58,980 --> 00:07:01,979
reminds me, Ralph. How many of those
calendars did you give out last
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00:07:01,980 --> 00:07:03,880
Oh, let me see. One for each tenant.
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00:07:04,120 --> 00:07:05,460
About 365.
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00:07:07,800 --> 00:07:10,180
Way beneath Rodenweezy. Way beneath.
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00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:25,240
So, this is how the other half lives.
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00:07:26,500 --> 00:07:28,340
I hope we can get a good table.
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00:07:28,640 --> 00:07:29,690
Leave it up to me.
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00:07:31,880 --> 00:07:34,540
Two for lunch.
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00:07:35,340 --> 00:07:36,660
Do you have a reservation?
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00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:38,210
No.
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00:07:38,220 --> 00:07:41,900
Well, I'm sorry, sir, but we won't be
able to accommodate you.
112
00:07:42,180 --> 00:07:43,480
But you don't know who I am.
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00:07:44,960 --> 00:07:46,380
And I don't care to.
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00:07:50,460 --> 00:07:51,540
Ah, Monsieur Ralph.
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00:07:51,541 --> 00:07:53,919
I didn't know this gentleman was with
you.
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00:07:53,920 --> 00:07:56,000
Will you require your usual table?
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00:07:56,220 --> 00:07:57,380
May we, Alphonse?
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00:07:57,740 --> 00:08:00,100
I'm sure the senator won't mind moving.
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00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:07,489
You've been here before, haven't you,
Ralph?
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00:08:07,490 --> 00:08:13,189
Now that you mention it, sir, last
summer the doorman's union held their
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00:08:13,190 --> 00:08:14,240
clam bake here.
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00:08:15,870 --> 00:08:17,490
Your table is ready.
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00:08:17,710 --> 00:08:18,760
Merci.
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00:08:25,710 --> 00:08:29,290
Who's that all about?
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00:08:29,950 --> 00:08:31,850
Alphonse thinks you're a TV star.
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00:08:31,851 --> 00:08:33,069
Oh, really?
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00:08:33,070 --> 00:08:34,120
Yes, sir.
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00:08:34,650 --> 00:08:38,210
I love it when you say, the plain pasta.
129
00:08:45,410 --> 00:08:46,460
Bon appétit.
130
00:08:46,830 --> 00:08:49,790
I can't tell you how much I appreciate
this, sir.
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00:08:50,430 --> 00:08:54,250
Dining with you in a place like this,
it's, well, it's the thrill of a
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00:08:55,150 --> 00:08:56,410
Hold that thought, Ralph.
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00:08:56,690 --> 00:09:01,869
Martin J. Bradshaw III, he owns one of
the largest textile companies in this
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00:09:01,870 --> 00:09:02,920
country. Oh.
135
00:09:03,290 --> 00:09:04,910
Oh, I'd give anything to meet him.
136
00:09:05,250 --> 00:09:06,300
Really?
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00:09:07,310 --> 00:09:08,630
Let me introduce you.
138
00:09:09,010 --> 00:09:10,060
Hey, Marty.
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00:09:11,050 --> 00:09:12,100
Ralph.
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00:09:13,910 --> 00:09:17,370
Ralph, you old son of a gun. Marty, you
old dog, you.
141
00:09:17,870 --> 00:09:22,169
How's the wife and kids? Oh, Barb's
fine. And you know, Chip, he's growing
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00:09:22,170 --> 00:09:23,129
a weed.
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00:09:23,130 --> 00:09:25,960
Oh, say, Ralph, let me buy a drink for
you and your friend.
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00:09:26,170 --> 00:09:27,990
Your money's no good here.
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00:09:28,230 --> 00:09:29,280
Waiter, send Mr.
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00:09:29,550 --> 00:09:31,050
Bradshaw's check to our table.
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00:09:31,680 --> 00:09:33,060
You don't mind, do you, sir?
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00:09:34,660 --> 00:09:37,250
Mind? Why should I mind? There were only
six of them.
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00:09:37,251 --> 00:09:43,359
Say, Ralph, you haven't sold your beach
house in the Virgin Islands, have you?
150
00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:45,040
And lose a neighbor like you?
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00:09:45,440 --> 00:09:46,490
Perish the thought.
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00:09:47,451 --> 00:09:53,939
Hey, Ralph, I'm paying for the guy's
meal. The least you could have done was
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00:09:53,940 --> 00:09:54,990
introduce me to him.
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00:09:55,280 --> 00:09:59,540
Oh, you know how it happens sometimes,
sir. I meant to introduce you, but...
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00:10:01,070 --> 00:10:02,170
I forgot your name.
156
00:10:04,970 --> 00:10:06,690
Oh, Mark.
157
00:10:06,990 --> 00:10:08,040
What's the matter?
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00:10:09,210 --> 00:10:12,190
We have a situation developing at table
four.
159
00:10:12,690 --> 00:10:14,130
Right behind you.
160
00:10:16,510 --> 00:10:23,330
Helen Willis. And that's not Tom Willis
with either.
161
00:10:24,810 --> 00:10:27,100
She told us she was going to the health
center.
162
00:10:27,130 --> 00:10:29,770
Looks like she's getting her help
somewhere else.
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00:10:29,771 --> 00:10:35,189
It's good that Willis wasn't paying
enough attention to her, but I didn't
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00:10:35,190 --> 00:10:36,849
things would have gotten this bad.
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00:10:36,850 --> 00:10:38,830
She's actually having an affair, Ralph.
166
00:10:39,450 --> 00:10:44,169
And the most depressing thing of all, it
had to happen on National Doorman's
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00:10:44,170 --> 00:10:45,220
Day.
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00:10:54,070 --> 00:10:58,309
I know what I saw. I'm telling you she
was with another man. They're having an
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00:10:58,310 --> 00:11:00,270
affair. You know what's even worse?
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00:11:00,590 --> 00:11:02,280
What? Ralph is loaded.
171
00:11:03,320 --> 00:11:05,920
Forget Ralph. I want to hear about
Helen.
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00:11:06,540 --> 00:11:08,680
I mean, that other situation.
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00:11:08,681 --> 00:11:09,999
Yeah, me too.
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00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:11,050
What?
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00:11:12,780 --> 00:11:14,760
Florence, this is kind of private.
176
00:11:14,980 --> 00:11:16,780
Would you mind going to the kitchen?
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00:11:17,120 --> 00:11:18,920
Uh -uh. Then I'd have to strain to here.
178
00:11:20,340 --> 00:11:23,110
If there's going to be some dirt, I
don't want to miss it.
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00:11:23,740 --> 00:11:25,660
I'm telling you, Weezy, she's too time.
180
00:11:26,240 --> 00:11:29,460
George, this isn't the place to discuss.
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00:11:31,880 --> 00:11:34,020
Greta and Heinrich's problem.
182
00:11:36,060 --> 00:11:37,280
Greta and Heinrich?
183
00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:41,700
Yes, you know Greta and Heinrich. We
were just talking about them.
184
00:11:42,920 --> 00:11:44,240
Is Heinrich fat?
185
00:11:45,760 --> 00:11:52,519
I just can't believe Greta's sneaking
around behind
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00:11:52,520 --> 00:11:53,860
Heinrich's back.
187
00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:55,560
I thought of my own two eyes.
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00:11:56,040 --> 00:12:00,950
I can't believe she'd do such a thing. I
know Greta. She's my best friend. Well,
189
00:12:01,050 --> 00:12:03,100
my best friend is... What's his name
again?
190
00:12:03,190 --> 00:12:04,240
Heinrich.
191
00:12:06,790 --> 00:12:07,840
Heinrich. That's him.
192
00:12:07,841 --> 00:12:11,169
And I can't see nobody making a monkey
out of my best friend, so I gotta tell
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00:12:11,170 --> 00:12:12,129
him what's going on.
194
00:12:12,130 --> 00:12:16,089
But, George, I don't think... Oh, excuse
me. I'll go in my room so y 'all can
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00:12:16,090 --> 00:12:17,140
talk freely.
196
00:12:17,250 --> 00:12:18,300
Thank you.
197
00:12:18,330 --> 00:12:20,210
Hmm. But I'm gonna tell you one thing.
198
00:12:20,211 --> 00:12:23,989
If Heinrich don't start paying more
attention to what Greta's doing down at
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00:12:23,990 --> 00:12:26,530
help center, the Willis is married to...
200
00:12:33,471 --> 00:12:40,639
I'm glad she's gone. Anyway, Wheeze, I
gotta tell him what's going on. I can't
201
00:12:40,640 --> 00:12:42,099
let Greta make a fool out of him.
202
00:12:42,100 --> 00:12:44,800
Uh, George, we can use their real names
now.
203
00:12:44,801 --> 00:12:49,219
Oh, yeah. Well, look, I gotta tell Tom
that Helen's fooling around behind his
204
00:12:49,220 --> 00:12:53,799
back. How can you? You don't have any
proof. Proof? I overheard him say they
205
00:12:53,800 --> 00:12:56,259
were going to meet at the same
restaurant again tomorrow.
206
00:12:56,260 --> 00:13:00,120
But, George, they could be going for
some perfectly innocent reason.
207
00:13:00,420 --> 00:13:02,320
Uh -uh, Wheeze. They had champagne.
208
00:13:04,300 --> 00:13:05,480
Oh, well.
209
00:13:05,481 --> 00:13:11,739
Like, you remember that time we took
Lionel to the zoo and we saw Andy Panda
210
00:13:11,740 --> 00:13:13,980
looking at Samantha Panda with those
eyes?
211
00:13:15,900 --> 00:13:20,300
Yes, but I don't... Well, Helen had Andy
Panda eyes.
212
00:13:23,420 --> 00:13:27,560
Well, George, suppose this is true,
which I don't think it is.
213
00:13:27,880 --> 00:13:29,580
It's none of our business.
214
00:13:29,920 --> 00:13:32,060
So promise me you won't tell him.
215
00:13:33,140 --> 00:13:34,700
Okay, I promise I won't tell him.
216
00:13:39,180 --> 00:13:40,230
I'll show him.
217
00:13:47,071 --> 00:13:48,559
Table
218
00:13:48,560 --> 00:13:56,579
for
219
00:13:56,580 --> 00:13:58,870
two. Ah, monsieur, do you have a
reservation?
220
00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:01,810
No, but... Then I'm sorry I cannot
accommodate you.
221
00:14:02,500 --> 00:14:04,180
Can you accommodate me for $10?
222
00:14:04,480 --> 00:14:05,530
No.
223
00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:07,940
Can you accommodate me for $20?
224
00:14:11,720 --> 00:14:14,500
No. The plane, boss. The plane.
225
00:14:16,380 --> 00:14:21,259
I have
226
00:14:21,260 --> 00:14:26,540
a very special table for you.
227
00:14:27,880 --> 00:14:28,930
Thank you.
228
00:14:29,780 --> 00:14:31,020
Thank you.
229
00:14:32,700 --> 00:14:34,740
Bon appétit. Same to you.
230
00:14:39,050 --> 00:14:41,430
This is a pretty fancy restaurant,
George.
231
00:14:41,650 --> 00:14:42,910
Why did you bring me here?
232
00:14:43,050 --> 00:14:44,490
Well, it's a good place to eat.
233
00:14:44,530 --> 00:14:47,780
Besides, I have something I want to show
you. Not tell you. Show you.
234
00:14:49,970 --> 00:14:51,710
Boy, you're going to see something.
235
00:14:52,870 --> 00:14:54,250
I don't understand, George.
236
00:14:54,830 --> 00:14:56,470
Oh, you will, Willis. You will.
237
00:14:56,471 --> 00:15:00,069
Take a look around and see if you see
anything interesting.
238
00:15:00,070 --> 00:15:03,210
Oh, I can't tear my eyes away from this
menu.
239
00:15:04,250 --> 00:15:05,990
Have you tried the bouillabaisse?
240
00:15:06,210 --> 00:15:09,770
Willis. Will you look around the
restaurant and see if you can find your
241
00:15:10,950 --> 00:15:12,000
Helen?
242
00:15:15,070 --> 00:15:16,670
Oh, yeah.
243
00:15:17,550 --> 00:15:20,170
Well, I have to go over and say hello
after we order.
244
00:15:20,870 --> 00:15:22,550
Did you notice anything strange?
245
00:15:23,090 --> 00:15:26,130
Yes, I don't have the prime ribs in the
hungry man's cut.
246
00:15:29,050 --> 00:15:33,130
Now that I have your attention, will you
listen to me?
247
00:15:33,670 --> 00:15:36,740
There's something I've got to explain to
you about your wife.
248
00:15:36,940 --> 00:15:39,440
When the cat's away, the mice will play.
249
00:15:40,060 --> 00:15:44,260
What? The grass is always greener on the
other side.
250
00:15:44,820 --> 00:15:48,900
Huh? There's gonna be a hot time in the
old town tonight.
251
00:15:49,420 --> 00:15:51,860
I beg your pardon? Your wife is cheating
on you.
252
00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:56,080
What? What are you talking about?
253
00:15:56,520 --> 00:15:59,500
Well, Helen wouldn't cheat on me. She
loves me.
254
00:15:59,501 --> 00:16:03,559
Besides, what possible reason could she
have for having an affair with another
255
00:16:03,560 --> 00:16:04,599
man? Look.
256
00:16:04,600 --> 00:16:07,299
She told me and Weezy that you weren't
paying enough attention to her.
257
00:16:07,300 --> 00:16:10,920
But Helen knows I've been busy. Well, as
you can see, she's been busy, too.
258
00:16:13,460 --> 00:16:14,510
Oh,
259
00:16:16,180 --> 00:16:20,020
there must be some other explanation for
this.
260
00:16:20,260 --> 00:16:22,120
Well, why would she want another man?
261
00:16:26,600 --> 00:16:28,340
Take a good look at that guy, Willis.
262
00:16:31,220 --> 00:16:32,540
Now take a look at yourself.
263
00:16:36,349 --> 00:16:37,399
She's leaving me.
264
00:16:37,970 --> 00:16:39,230
George, what should I do?
265
00:16:39,231 --> 00:16:42,149
Well, I know what I would do if it was
my wife. I'd go over there and beat the
266
00:16:42,150 --> 00:16:43,200
hell out of the guy.
267
00:16:44,041 --> 00:16:46,029
You're right.
268
00:16:46,030 --> 00:16:47,110
Push has come to shove.
269
00:16:47,111 --> 00:16:50,889
I'm about to lose someone I love, my
wife. That's right. I'm not about to let
270
00:16:50,890 --> 00:16:52,210
her go without a fight. Good.
271
00:16:52,410 --> 00:16:55,360
If the waiter comes, tell him I'll have
the bouillabaisse.
272
00:16:58,430 --> 00:16:59,480
Hello,
273
00:17:00,770 --> 00:17:02,350
Helen. Oh, Tom, what a surprise.
274
00:17:02,930 --> 00:17:04,270
Yes, I'll bet it is.
275
00:17:04,819 --> 00:17:08,280
I'd like you to meet... Save the names.
I'll deal with you later, woman.
276
00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:12,040
You, sir, stand up.
277
00:17:13,280 --> 00:17:14,330
No.
278
00:17:16,700 --> 00:17:19,339
All right, then we'll duke it out
sitting down.
279
00:17:19,780 --> 00:17:21,560
Who is this man?
280
00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:24,619
Well, usually he's my husband, Tom
Willis.
281
00:17:24,940 --> 00:17:28,879
Tom, this is called David. I know what's
going on between you and my wife. What
282
00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:29,839
are you talking about?
283
00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:31,100
This doesn't concern you.
284
00:17:32,920 --> 00:17:34,420
waiting for you outside.
285
00:17:35,260 --> 00:17:37,280
And if you're a man, you'll be there.
286
00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:42,400
Oh, George, I've changed my mind. Order
me a steak.
287
00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:44,900
And make it rare.
288
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:50,340
Oh, Carl, I have to apologize.
289
00:17:50,700 --> 00:17:52,560
That's a strange man you've got there.
290
00:17:53,140 --> 00:17:56,260
Believe me, I've never seen Tom act like
that before.
291
00:17:56,580 --> 00:17:58,560
I can't understand what's come over him.
292
00:18:00,420 --> 00:18:01,470
Oh.
293
00:18:01,960 --> 00:18:04,060
Now I understand what's come over him.
294
00:18:05,220 --> 00:18:06,600
Well, well, well.
295
00:18:11,160 --> 00:18:15,020
So, you got caught with your hand in the
cookie jar, huh, son?
296
00:18:17,160 --> 00:18:18,660
You cheap bigelow.
297
00:18:20,100 --> 00:18:21,940
That's gigolo. He admits it.
298
00:18:24,280 --> 00:18:25,900
George, what's going on here?
299
00:18:26,140 --> 00:18:27,320
As if you didn't know.
300
00:18:27,700 --> 00:18:28,750
How could you?
301
00:18:29,420 --> 00:18:31,280
I admit your husband's not that much.
302
00:18:31,281 --> 00:18:33,779
He may not be the best looking guy in
the world.
303
00:18:33,780 --> 00:18:35,400
Lord knows he's not the thinnest.
304
00:18:35,401 --> 00:18:40,179
But he's a decent man and a loyal man.
He would never hurt you the way you're
305
00:18:40,180 --> 00:18:41,230
hurting him.
306
00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:44,420
Now, what you got to say for yourself?
307
00:18:44,660 --> 00:18:49,479
George, I've been helping Carl set up
the new marriage counseling program at
308
00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:51,680
help center. We just came here to
celebrate.
309
00:18:52,900 --> 00:18:53,950
Oh.
310
00:18:55,040 --> 00:18:56,540
You're a marriage counselor?
311
00:18:57,200 --> 00:18:59,910
Yep. Then why don't you counsel this
woman's husband?
312
00:19:00,300 --> 00:19:01,350
He's a hothead.
313
00:19:01,351 --> 00:19:06,159
He's always jumping to conclusions. I
tried to tell him. I said, look, it's
314
00:19:06,160 --> 00:19:08,210
nothing going on between the two of
them.
315
00:19:08,381 --> 00:19:11,099
You think he'd listen to me?
316
00:19:11,100 --> 00:19:12,150
No.
317
00:19:12,680 --> 00:19:14,740
Well, no harm done. Later, bro.
318
00:19:14,811 --> 00:19:21,919
So, he thinks he can make a fool of me,
huh? Willis, I gotta talk to you. What?
319
00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:23,540
Wait, no, no. I'm in with you. What?
320
00:19:23,820 --> 00:19:24,870
Carl,
321
00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:29,340
I've never been so embarrassed.
322
00:19:30,230 --> 00:19:32,950
Believe me, Tom would never act like
that on his own.
323
00:19:33,390 --> 00:19:34,710
What about that other guy?
324
00:19:35,870 --> 00:19:36,920
George?
325
00:19:37,130 --> 00:19:39,990
Well, let's just say that every day is a
full moon for him.
326
00:19:41,830 --> 00:19:43,630
Excuse me, I've got to go settle this.
327
00:19:43,750 --> 00:19:44,800
No, wait, Helen.
328
00:19:45,630 --> 00:19:49,230
As long as he thinks we're having an
affair, let's not disappoint him.
329
00:19:49,670 --> 00:19:50,720
What?
330
00:19:51,170 --> 00:19:52,790
I'm very attracted to you, Helen.
331
00:19:53,310 --> 00:19:54,360
I want you.
332
00:19:54,430 --> 00:19:55,480
For what?
333
00:19:55,741 --> 00:20:03,069
I've tried to imagine what your husband
was like, and now that I've met him, I
334
00:20:03,070 --> 00:20:04,810
know you're ready to have an affair.
335
00:20:07,410 --> 00:20:09,010
What are you talking about?
336
00:20:09,011 --> 00:20:10,509
I'm a marriage counselor.
337
00:20:10,510 --> 00:20:13,829
You told me your husband wasn't paying
enough attention to you. That's a danger
338
00:20:13,830 --> 00:20:17,970
sign. Helen, you're signaling me that
you'd like to have an affair.
339
00:20:19,050 --> 00:20:20,100
I am?
340
00:20:21,170 --> 00:20:22,370
Let's not kid ourselves.
341
00:20:22,470 --> 00:20:23,520
We're adults.
342
00:20:23,630 --> 00:20:25,550
There's a nice hotel around the corner.
343
00:20:26,510 --> 00:20:29,040
I'll do some of my best counseling under
the sheet.
344
00:20:30,640 --> 00:20:31,690
What do you think?
345
00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:34,280
Man, you touch me and you're history.
346
00:20:37,540 --> 00:20:38,590
Hi.
347
00:20:38,980 --> 00:20:43,759
Look who's here. Mr. Egg on my face.
Tom. No, no, Helen. I just talked to
348
00:20:43,760 --> 00:20:45,499
George. He explained the whole thing.
349
00:20:45,500 --> 00:20:47,860
But Tom. No, no. I was wrong.
350
00:20:47,861 --> 00:20:51,979
I mean, I made a fool of myself as
usual. Please, Carl, go right ahead with
351
00:20:51,980 --> 00:20:53,030
plans.
352
00:20:54,560 --> 00:20:57,640
By the way, I love what you're planning
to do with my wife.
353
00:20:59,880 --> 00:21:00,930
You do?
354
00:21:00,931 --> 00:21:04,559
Tom. Helen, now, you know I have to work
late Tuesday night, so if you two need
355
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:06,300
to get together, use the apartment.
356
00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:09,480
Hey, thanks, pal.
357
00:21:09,481 --> 00:21:14,159
Sweetheart, I know I haven't been paying
much attention to your activities
358
00:21:14,160 --> 00:21:18,780
lately, but I want to know everything
about what you two do.
359
00:21:20,060 --> 00:21:22,830
And once you're settled in, I want to
see some pictures.
360
00:21:25,460 --> 00:21:27,480
He wanted to take me to a hotel.
361
00:21:28,020 --> 00:21:29,070
Well, fine.
362
00:21:29,210 --> 00:21:30,260
Fine, fine.
363
00:21:31,310 --> 00:21:34,450
Oh, I'll tell you what. Let me make up
for the way I behaved today.
364
00:21:34,650 --> 00:21:35,790
You want to use a hotel?
365
00:21:36,030 --> 00:21:37,330
Let me pay for the room.
366
00:21:38,750 --> 00:21:41,050
This man just made a pass at me.
367
00:21:41,590 --> 00:21:43,810
Fine, fine. Whatever you... Say what?
368
00:21:46,770 --> 00:21:48,330
Baby, you just blew a good thing.
369
00:21:48,490 --> 00:21:50,170
Did you make a pass at my wife?
370
00:21:51,190 --> 00:21:53,360
I sure did, man. You ought to try it
sometime.
371
00:21:54,930 --> 00:21:56,290
Well, that's it.
372
00:21:58,030 --> 00:22:01,520
You better stand up this time, because I
want to see you fall a long way.
373
00:22:02,630 --> 00:22:06,809
Come on, man, lighten up. You got a good
-looking woman here. If you can't take
374
00:22:06,810 --> 00:22:08,370
care of her, someone else has to.
375
00:22:08,610 --> 00:22:09,660
Get up.
376
00:22:09,870 --> 00:22:11,570
Tom, don't do this.
377
00:22:11,910 --> 00:22:13,510
He's not worth it. Put him up.
378
00:22:13,950 --> 00:22:15,000
George!
379
00:22:18,750 --> 00:22:19,800
Okay?
380
00:22:21,410 --> 00:22:22,460
Let's do it.
381
00:22:24,390 --> 00:22:26,980
Listen, I want you to know that I'm not
a violent man.
382
00:22:26,981 --> 00:22:30,389
But you've driven me this far, and
there's no turning back now.
383
00:22:30,390 --> 00:22:35,349
Put him up. Tom, please. Oh, no, Helen.
A man's got to do what a man's got to
384
00:22:35,350 --> 00:22:37,030
do. Now stand aside.
385
00:22:37,850 --> 00:22:39,110
Put him up.
386
00:22:40,950 --> 00:22:45,330
You know, I want you to know that I've
learned a very valuable lesson today.
387
00:22:45,550 --> 00:22:48,730
Oh, yes, I have. A husband has to pay
attention to his wife.
388
00:22:48,731 --> 00:22:52,929
I mean, marriage is a partnership, and
what's important to one partner should
389
00:22:52,930 --> 00:22:56,309
important to the other partner. Now,
that's true. As a marriage counselor,
390
00:22:56,310 --> 00:22:58,540
found... Oh, trying to weasel out of
this, huh?
391
00:22:58,750 --> 00:23:00,860
Why don't you quit stalling? Put them
off.
392
00:23:01,130 --> 00:23:02,180
Look,
393
00:23:02,181 --> 00:23:05,249
I can't take any more of this. I don't
know about you, but I'm an emotional
394
00:23:05,250 --> 00:23:09,350
wreck. I'll tell you what. Let's just
say that we've had it out, and you've
395
00:23:09,450 --> 00:23:10,500
okay?
396
00:23:10,550 --> 00:23:12,390
Well, I... Let it go, Tom.
397
00:23:12,830 --> 00:23:15,550
Well, all right, Helen, but I still
say... Ow!
398
00:23:19,710 --> 00:23:20,770
All right, it's over.
399
00:23:21,750 --> 00:23:24,640
Well, now, get out of here. All right,
all right, all right.
400
00:23:26,290 --> 00:23:30,230
But, uh, baby, if you change your
mind... Oh,
401
00:23:32,130 --> 00:23:33,810
you're wonderful.
402
00:23:35,650 --> 00:23:36,700
Oh,
403
00:23:37,790 --> 00:23:40,080
honey, I was so scared he was going to
hurt you.
404
00:23:40,310 --> 00:23:41,670
Not half as scared as I was.
405
00:23:42,990 --> 00:23:46,810
Helen, I want to make you a promise.
From now on, whatever interests you,
406
00:23:46,890 --> 00:23:47,940
interests me, okay?
407
00:23:50,620 --> 00:23:54,840
Okay. Oh, come on, let's go home, Rocky.
408
00:24:00,380 --> 00:24:06,540
Oh, George, I've changed my mind again.
Cancel my order. I'm in training.
409
00:24:36,631 --> 00:24:38,729
Hmm.
410
00:24:38,730 --> 00:24:43,280
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