Original subtitles

Well, we're moving on up. We're moving on up.

woman who's getting a rash all over her body because her husband goes to bed at

night with long, woolly underwear.

What? And every night it... It what?

It's continued on page 31.

Would you put that back?

Oh, look. The meat market's having a sale on prime rump. Good. Now get your

out of here.

Good morning, Florence.

Oh, good morning, Mr. George!

George. Why don't you give him a kiss? He might turn into a prince.

George, are you asleep?

Yes. Well, wake up. It's such a beautiful day.

It was.

We should be out doing something. Yeah.

Enjoying ourselves.

Yeah. Having some fun. Yeah, let's go.

You ain't going nowhere but back to work.

One look at him turns a beautiful day ugly.

Good night.

Oh, come on. Come on, George. Can't we do something together?

Sure we can, Weezy. You sleep at that end of the sofa and I sleep at this end.

Oh, come on, George.

Look, Weezy, this is my day off. Now, you're always telling me to relax. Well,

I'm trying to relax.

Okay, I'm staying here all day nagging you to go out with me.

Oh, come on, Weezy. I ain't gonna do that. You know, I'm... And when I nag,

nobody sleeps.

Hi, girl. Oh, hi, Hallie. Come on in. Just for a minute. I can't stay.

That's the first good news I heard today.

Oh? Been listening to yourself again, George?

What have you got there, Helen? This is what I wanted to show you.

It's some of the work I'm doing in my art class.

Art class?

What do you think?

You drew this?

I think it's wonderful.

That's what I think, too.

It ain't nothing but a bunch of round circles.

They're oranges.

Well, why ain't they art?

Because I'm sketching with charcoal.

Why, are you too cheap to buy crayons?

I didn't know you were going to art school.

Oh, yes. As a matter of fact, I'm on my way now.

Oh, I just love it, Louise.

And it gets me out of the house.

Hey, Louise, that's a great idea. Why don't you go to art class?

What? That's a terrific idea.

You could join today.

Great. Oh, I don't know. You wouldn't mind being left on your own, would you,

George? No, I'm willing to make the sacrifice.

But, girl, you said yourself you loved art when you were in high school.

Yes, but... And you were always painting when we first got married.

That was because we couldn't afford wallpaper.

Oh, come on, Louise, you'll enjoy it.

Well, will you come too, George?

Hell no, I ain't going to buy his art, Clint.

But I wanted to do something together.

But, Weasley, you'll be doing something together with Helen.

Oh, well, okay. It might be fun.

Sure it will. And look, Weasley, instead of oranges, draw me a cheeseburger.

A cheeseburger?

Yeah, look, I don't know nothing about art, but I know what I like.

What's so funny, George?

Nothing. I just didn't know it was Halloween already.

Well, for your information, this is my golfing outfit.

Oh.

Helen, if you want me to drop you off at your art class, you'd better hurry up,

or I'm going to be late for my tea time. I thought you were going to play golf

and not drink tea.

I'm ready, Tom, and Louise is coming, too.

Great. That'll be nice company for you.

I wish you had something to do, too, George.

Yes, it's a shame you don't play golf. You could go with Tom.

Helen. It would be good for you to get out there on the course, wouldn't it,

Tom? Helen, George does not want to play golf with me.

Damn right.

You see? Now, come on.

Why don't you take it up, George?

Oh, Louise, he'd just be embarrassed.

It's impossible for a beginner to play golf just like that.

That's right.

George would look like an idiot trying to play against me.

Oh!

Look, Chump, I'll beat you in golf any day.

Oh, that's ridiculous. Golf is a very difficult game. Oh, yeah, all you gotta

is hit this little ball with this great big stick. Oh, yeah?

Yeah, any fool could do that.

Well, why don't you prove you're as good as any other fool, George?

Okay, I will.

No, George, I think you ought to start with miniature golf.

What's the matter? You scared I'll beat you?

You beat me?

Last week, I shot seven birdies.

Look, don't try to change the subject.

Now, we're talking about golf, not hunting.

All right, come on. You asked for it. I'm going to beat the pants off him.

And with those pants, I'll be doing everybody a big favor.

You'll

enjoy

it, Louie.

I hope so. I'm kind of nervous.

Oh, Miss Pomeroy. Hello, Helen.

This is my friend, Louise Jefferson. She'd like to join the class.

Marvelous. Have you ever done any drawing before?

Funny you should ask that.

I... Good. Here's a pad and here's some charcoal.

Now, we'll worry about filling out the forms later.

All right.

First time here, huh? Yeah.

Me too.

Oh, good.

I hear she's a good teacher.

Yeah? Well, I guess if we both like it, we'll be seeing a lot more of each

other. Could be.

Charlie! Well, I gotta go to work now. Okay.

anatomy. But I thought we were going to do still life.

We are.

He's not moving.

Now go ahead, start drawing.

Oh my God, I can't.

Louise, Louise, just do your best. Nobody expects you to be perfect the

time.

Well, can't I start with some oranges?

You've seen a nude man before. What about George?

George isn't a man.

He's my husband.

Girls, start drawing.

Okay.

just because you got lucky. Lucky? Now, what you talking about? I beat you fair

and square. You did everything wrong. Like what? Well, you're not supposed to

use a driver on the putting green.

Why not? It worked.

God knows how.

Your ball took off like a rocket, hit a tree, and bounced back into the hole.

That was a clever shot, wasn't it?

It was a freak.

It was not, man. I aimed at that tree.

I beat you. I beat you. I beat you. I beat you. George.

George. I beat you. Winning is not that important.

You're right.

The important thing is you lost.

Well, you don't have to tell the whole world.

Don't worry about it, Willis. I wouldn't embarrass you. I'll keep it quiet.

Oh, thank you.

Hey, Floyd!

I beat the pants off of old Willis and got him.

Thanks, George.

He beat you? Well, yes.

Lord, you sure must be a lousy player.

He's a good player. I'm just great.

All right! Hey, George, back already?

Hey, Wheeze, I slaughtered him.

Tom, he didn't.

You must have had an off day.

That's right. He was off all day in the woods looking for his ball.

Well, I guess I'll get some more ice. What for, Willis? You weren't that hot

there today.

Well,

I'm glad you enjoyed your game, George. Oh, yeah. How'd you make out in art

class? Did you draw some little oranges?

Uh, no.

We weren't drawing any fruit today.

Oh, flowers, huh?

Not exactly.

Well, what was it? It was a live model, George.

Oh! You mean like a cute little puppy dog?

Hey, that's good. Let me see.

Oh, no, George. It's not very good.

Come on, Wheezy. I know it's your first try.

No, George.

Look, Wheezy, I'm not going to laugh at it.

but it hurt you.

Oh, shut up, Florence.

Louise, I'm surprised that you're talking like that to our faithful maid.

Look, George, you're behaving like a crazy man.

It's just a nude.

It ain't just no nude, it's a naked dude.

There's nothing wrong with a naked body. Oh, no? How would you like it if I

wasn't running around the street without no clothes on? Probably nobody would

notice.

and the next minute, I'm going to shut up Florence.

No, you ain't.

Now you are shut up and get in the kitchen, Florence.

What's all the shouting about?

None of your damn business. Oh.

I'm surprised at you, Louise.

I never thought that the mother of my child would be drawing dirty pictures.

It's not dirty. It's art.

I thought you'd be drawing fruit, not that weirdo.

Weirdo? That man is a professional model.

Oh, yeah, and what does he model? Open raincoats?

Oh, come on, George.

No, you come on. Now, look, if he had any decency, he would have posed like

this.

Good, Miss Jefferson. That's where to hit him.

My wife spends half the morning with some naked man and with her eyes wide

That ain't funny.

It's no use, Louise. You know what they say. Small minds come in small packages.

Oh, yeah?

Well, I've got one place for this small package. What are you going to do? I'm

going to get rid of this thing and throw it in the trash. I ain't keeping this

mess in my house. Oh, now, just a second, Buster.

This is my house, too. Right on, sister.

And you can't tell me what to do. Right on, sister.

And I have got a right to keep... I picture as much as you have to keep your

naked women. Right on. Naked women?

Why, George, you little old devil, you.

Naked women where? Yeah, where?

Where?

In the back of the closet, at the bottom of your duffel bag, under your old Navy

uniform.

Oh, these are them old pictures, them old pinup pictures from the service.

How'd you know about them, anyway?

Florence found them when she was cleaning.

How come she never cleans places where we can see?

So, George, what's good for the gander is good for this mother goose.

Right on, mother.

You shut up.

Oh, why don't you give up? George, you know you're wrong.

Oh, I am, am I? And I suppose your husband don't care about you going

painting strangers in their birthday suits.

Of course not. Tom has an open mind.

Yeah, you're right about that. It's so open you can see right through it.

Do you mind if I make myself another drink?

Look, before you do that, I think your wife has something to ask you.

Go on, ask her.

Okay.

Tom, now something happened in art class today. Oh, I know. Florence told me all

about it.

You see, Tom doesn't mind a bit if I draw a man in the nude.

Do you, dear?

Do you, Tom?

Well... What's well supposed to mean?

It's just a well. I often start a sentence with a well.

Well, finish it.

Well... Well, well.

You haven't answered my question.

Oh.

Well... I'm sorry, the wells just keep welling up in me today.

Frankly, Helen, I'd be much happier if you'd stick to oranges.

Oranges? Or apples?

See? Now you're beginning to sound just like George.

Next you'll be saying I can't go to my art class anymore.

Well... Will you excuse me, Louise? I have to go upstairs.

Oh, something you have to do?

No, something I have to get away from.

I'll be up in a few minutes, dear.

Who cares?

Sore loser.

All right, Louise.

Now that we've all agreed that that's a dirty picture, let me have a... I

haven't voted yet.

What? Let me tell you something, George. I'm going to that art class, and I like

this picture. In fact, I like it so much, I'm going to put it right over

where everybody can see it. Oh, come on. And you'd better not touch it or else.

Or else what?

Ask me tonight, George.

Okay, I won't touch the picture.

You promise?

I promise. I can't hear you. I promise, I promise.

Can you hear me now?

Oh, perfectly.

In fact, I could hear you when the door was closed.

What do you want? Could I borrow a colander?

I'll save you the trouble. It's Saturday the 18th. No, no, no.

Not a calendar. I need a colander to drain my noodles.

Come in, Mr. Bentley.

Oh, thank you, Mrs. J.

You see, I'm fixing beef stroganoff for Susan, and... I'll see if I can find

one. Thank you.

Hi, Bentley.

Hello, Mr. Willis. And how's your lovely wife?

Angry.

Ah. It's all because of him.

Oh, I see.

If this is the way you caught him, you're the one who ought to be angry.

And it's signed Louise Jefferson. My goodness.

I had no idea she did this sort of thing.

She's going to put pants on him next week.

Oh, heavens no.

The unclothed body is a beautiful sight to behold.

As a matter of fact, I was trying to convince Susan of that last evening.

Just before she left.

But, getting back to the sketch... Can't we change the subject?

Oh, certainly.

You know, my great -great -uncle Jonathan was an artist.

That's it. Change the subject.

Oh, I just did. You see, now I'm talking about my great -great -uncle Jonathan.

He was far ahead of his time. He wanted to paint Queen Victoria in the nude.

But, of course, they wouldn't allow it.

I should hope not.

Oh, no. They made him put on a bathrobe first.

Here you are.

Oh, thank you. Is there anything else you need?

Well, I could use that perfect palette of yours to sample my stroganoff.

You see, it's the first time I've made it.

Oh, I guess I can taste it for you. I'll only be a minute, George.

Cherry pie.

Oh, boy.

What a lousy day this has turned out to be.

Yep.

The only bright spot in it was me beating you in golf.

The only reason you won was because you're twice as close to the ball as I

Oh, yeah? Well, at least I don't have to lean over my stomach to see the ball.

What? Look, Willis, I'm just trying to help you. You help me?

Look. You know what your problem is? Your stomach gets in the way of your

Now, either you've got to stop eating so much, or you've got to try the Willie

Mays swing, like this.

Now, see what you did?

Me? It was your fault. I was showing you your swing.

Well, you better do something quick.

Hurry, George, hurry up.

Is it coming off?

Yeah, all of it.

George!

Oh, no!

Wait until my back was turned, could you? No, no, it was an accident. Oh,

Accidentally, that napkin jumped up into your hand, and accidentally your hand

smeared my dick. No, no, it really was an accident. Ask Willis. Oh, he's on

side, George. I'm not asking him anything.

Oh, then I'm not needed here any longer.

Come back here, you coward.

Coward? I'm going up to face Helen.

You... Promise, George.

I didn't do it on purpose. You promised. You broke your promise. I'm telling

you, I don't want to hear anymore.

I don't want to hear anymore. I won't talk to you.

Don't you talk to me ever.

Please, you come out of there.

You're wrong.

I'm the one that's supposed to get in there and lock himself in there. Not

If I was you, I wouldn't be making up to her, Mr. Jefferson.

What? Look, I heard everything, even when I wasn't listening.

And you're right about that picture. It's the devil's work. Look, I don't

about no picture. What am I going to do? She won't even talk to me.

Who pays the rent around here?

I do.

And who pays for all the food and all the clothes?

I do.

And who's the boss around here?

Me. Then act like it. Go up to that door and lay down the law. Right.

Tell her who the man of the house is. Right.

Accident. I can't prove it, but it was.

Look, come on, let's make up.

I'll let you do anything you want.

I'll let you go back to the art class, okay?

And you can draw anything you want, okay?

Okay.

You want to do things together, right?

Okay, this is what we'll do.

The next time you go to the art class, I'll go with you. Okay?

Oh, George.

It'll be just fine, Louise.

Here you are, Mr. Jefferson.

I'm so glad you decided to join us. Me too.

You'll get a kick out of it, George. Sure, I will. When are you going to

I've got to watch a game on TV tonight.

Oh, this is bad. Better than a silly old ball game.

Sure it is, we.

A class like this broadens your horizons. Sure we.

You look at the world with new eyes. You look at things with a completely

different perspective.

All right, class.

Nancy.

You damn right. It was a whole lot different.

Come on, George. We are leaving.

Look, Weezy, like you said, what's good for the goose is good for this gander.

Oh, yeah?

Well, you take one more gander and your goose is cooked.

Like I said, Weezy, I don't know much about art, but I know what I like.

The Jeffersons was videotaped in front of a studio audience.

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0