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1
00:00:02,585 --> 00:00:04,211
You're about
to learn the tragic fate
2
00:00:04,212 --> 00:00:05,921
of the Oak Point High
lacrosse team.
3
00:00:05,922 --> 00:00:08,340
But this podcast won't cash in
on their specific
4
00:00:08,341 --> 00:00:10,843
and particularly gruesome
group decapitation.
5
00:00:10,844 --> 00:00:12,720
Too bad.
Someone else will.
6
00:00:12,721 --> 00:00:13,804
It's a big market, man.
7
00:00:13,805 --> 00:00:15,097
Morty, don't just respond.
8
00:00:15,098 --> 00:00:16,682
Find a podcast without scruples.
9
00:00:16,683 --> 00:00:18,350
CryoShip detected.
10
00:00:18,351 --> 00:00:20,144
Ooh, power's still online?
11
00:00:20,145 --> 00:00:22,271
Whattaya think, Morty?
Bunch of sleeping beauties?
12
00:00:22,272 --> 00:00:23,772
Wanna go tap on some glass?
13
00:00:23,773 --> 00:00:25,107
Uh, that could be fun.
14
00:00:25,108 --> 00:00:26,608
W-We haven't done one
of those in a while.
15
00:00:26,609 --> 00:00:28,444
Welcome to "Bloodbath"!
16
00:00:28,445 --> 00:00:30,070
The podcast
that's only grisly details!
17
00:00:30,071 --> 00:00:32,406
Now we're talking!
18
00:00:38,246 --> 00:00:40,873
Holy shit.
Look at this place.
19
00:00:40,874 --> 00:00:43,459
Damn, Morty, ain't just
your run-of-the-mill ark ship.
20
00:00:43,460 --> 00:00:45,127
This thing is gold-plated.
21
00:00:45,128 --> 00:00:46,962
Wow, w-where
do you think they're going?
22
00:00:46,963 --> 00:00:49,923
Ha ha. Looks like these guys
flung themselves into space
23
00:00:49,924 --> 00:00:51,300
after wrecking their home world.
24
00:00:51,301 --> 00:00:53,135
This'll be like taking
candy from a baby,
25
00:00:53,136 --> 00:00:54,470
if that baby was in a coma.
26
00:00:54,471 --> 00:00:56,513
Oh. We're...
We're robbing them?
27
00:00:56,514 --> 00:00:59,308
Morty what did
I just say about scruples?
28
00:00:59,309 --> 00:01:01,810
Whoa, mama.
You see this, Morty?
29
00:01:01,811 --> 00:01:03,395
T-T-This thing is fancy.
30
00:01:03,396 --> 00:01:05,898
Computer said it's got
super-rare hypercoal inside.
31
00:01:05,899 --> 00:01:08,692
Ha ha ha! The planet they left
must be a husk, Morty.
32
00:01:08,693 --> 00:01:10,319
Access denied.
33
00:01:10,320 --> 00:01:11,528
Huh.
34
00:01:11,529 --> 00:01:13,489
Alright, on second thought,
35
00:01:13,490 --> 00:01:15,157
let's just blow a hole in the
ship and drag the vault home.
36
00:01:15,158 --> 00:01:16,658
What?!
Help me with these charges.
37
00:01:16,659 --> 00:01:18,368
This'll be quick.
They got fast countdowns.
38
00:01:18,369 --> 00:01:20,329
Rick, I-I'm fine
with taking candy from a baby,
39
00:01:20,330 --> 00:01:22,831
but I-I draw the line
at blowing up the stroller!
40
00:01:22,832 --> 00:01:24,416
What the hell, Morty?!
41
00:01:24,417 --> 00:01:25,834
We're not literally
robbing babies.
42
00:01:25,835 --> 00:01:27,252
Aah!
43
00:01:27,253 --> 00:01:28,504
God damn it, Morty!
Look what you did!
44
00:01:28,505 --> 00:01:30,631
They're counting down
even faster.
45
00:01:31,841 --> 00:01:33,509
Fire detected.
46
00:01:33,510 --> 00:01:35,469
Emergency Cryo-wake
commencing in 30 seconds.
47
00:01:35,470 --> 00:01:37,221
You little shit!
You woke 'em up!
48
00:01:37,222 --> 00:01:38,764
Good! Let's get outta here!
Fuck you.
49
00:01:38,765 --> 00:01:41,850
I'm not leaving
without that hypercoal!
50
00:01:41,851 --> 00:01:44,019
Now go find that other pod
with a dead guy in it.
51
00:01:44,020 --> 00:01:45,104
Hey!
Sub-Bay 18.
52
00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:46,480
What dead guy?!
53
00:01:46,481 --> 00:01:48,107
Just get in the pod
with the bones!
54
00:01:48,108 --> 00:01:50,025
Or don't, and
get thrown out an airlock.
55
00:01:50,026 --> 00:01:51,693
Cryo-wake in 10 seconds.
You did this to yourself, Morty.
56
00:01:51,694 --> 00:01:53,862
Everything that happens
after this is your fault.
57
00:01:53,863 --> 00:01:55,656
You're gonna wish you were
one of those Oak Point kids
58
00:01:55,657 --> 00:01:57,032
after I get through with you.
I'm going, I'm going!
59
00:01:57,033 --> 00:01:58,408
Don't you run away from me!
60
00:01:58,409 --> 00:01:59,576
I've got more to yell
at you, Morty!
61
00:01:59,577 --> 00:02:00,702
Morty!
62
00:02:32,402 --> 00:02:34,778
Cryo-wake in three, two...
Shit, shit, shit.
63
00:02:34,779 --> 00:02:38,198
Whoa! Uh! Uh! Aah! Oh! Ah!
64
00:02:43,496 --> 00:02:44,621
Oh, boy.
65
00:02:44,622 --> 00:02:46,957
Talk about cryo-crick
in the neck.
66
00:02:46,958 --> 00:02:49,001
Hope my schwanz still works.
67
00:02:50,753 --> 00:02:52,254
What's a schwanz?
68
00:02:52,255 --> 00:02:53,714
- Jimmy?!
- Oh, my God!
69
00:02:53,715 --> 00:02:54,923
Jimmy? Is that you?!
70
00:02:54,924 --> 00:02:56,049
Umm, no?
71
00:02:56,050 --> 00:02:57,259
It's our boy, honey...
72
00:02:57,260 --> 00:02:58,802
He's got the family bald spot.
73
00:02:58,803 --> 00:03:00,387
Doctor! Doctor, please!
74
00:03:00,388 --> 00:03:01,805
Ah, Karen.
How can I...
75
00:03:01,806 --> 00:03:03,348
Oh, my God!
76
00:03:03,349 --> 00:03:05,267
The pod. There must
have been some kind of...
77
00:03:05,268 --> 00:03:06,393
malfunction.
78
00:03:06,394 --> 00:03:08,145
Son?
Are you in there?
79
00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:09,521
What do you remember?
80
00:03:09,522 --> 00:03:12,649
Um, last thing
I remember was being... 13.
81
00:03:12,650 --> 00:03:14,276
11.
11.
82
00:03:14,277 --> 00:03:16,111
It must be the pituitary
governor on his pod.
83
00:03:16,112 --> 00:03:17,613
While we were in stasis,
84
00:03:17,614 --> 00:03:19,114
Jimmy kept growing
at an accelerated rate.
85
00:03:19,115 --> 00:03:20,449
Will he be okay?
86
00:03:20,450 --> 00:03:23,035
Short answer... no.
Long answer... nope.
87
00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:24,620
Doctor!
88
00:03:24,621 --> 00:03:26,663
I went to school
for medicine, not manners.
89
00:03:26,664 --> 00:03:30,083
Look at him... gray skin,
necrotic breath, jaundiced eyes.
90
00:03:30,084 --> 00:03:31,376
I give him a week, tops.
91
00:03:31,377 --> 00:03:33,587
Our poor child!
92
00:03:33,588 --> 00:03:36,965
We're gonna use whatever time we
have left to make things right.
93
00:03:36,966 --> 00:03:38,383
Should I get him some clothes?
94
00:03:38,384 --> 00:03:40,135
His penis is big now.
95
00:03:42,889 --> 00:03:45,849
Ugh. Wish that pod had
a snooze button.
96
00:03:45,850 --> 00:03:47,809
Alright, Makeys,
let's get to work!
97
00:03:47,810 --> 00:03:50,771
Um, aren't... aren't we all,
like, super rich?
98
00:03:52,232 --> 00:03:54,858
Only thing "rich" down here
is that joke.
99
00:03:54,859 --> 00:03:57,361
"Chachaco"...
you're on toilet duty.
100
00:03:57,362 --> 00:04:00,322
Ooohhkay, I'm not supposed
to be here.
101
00:04:00,323 --> 00:04:01,990
M-M-My grandpa's a scientist.
102
00:04:01,991 --> 00:04:03,992
I-I just jumped in this pod because...
What?
103
00:04:03,993 --> 00:04:06,578
MedBay! Got another
compliance chip on the fritz.
104
00:04:06,579 --> 00:04:09,915
Why do I have to mop?!
I should be driving the ship!
105
00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:14,586
Ohhhh! Ha ha.
J-Jokin' again!
106
00:04:14,587 --> 00:04:17,005
I-I'm definitely the thing
you guys are.
107
00:04:17,006 --> 00:04:18,757
Uh, ready to clean!
108
00:04:20,843 --> 00:04:23,095
Jimmy! There you are!
109
00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:24,388
We've been looking for you.
110
00:04:24,389 --> 00:04:25,931
Are you trying to open
the vault?
111
00:04:25,932 --> 00:04:28,517
I thought maybe
you were stuck in there.
112
00:04:28,518 --> 00:04:30,185
I'm just a kid and, uh, dumb.
113
00:04:30,186 --> 00:04:31,561
That's alright, sweetie.
114
00:04:31,562 --> 00:04:34,022
Money affords us
the ability to be dumb.
115
00:04:34,023 --> 00:04:35,649
Son, it's important to us
116
00:04:35,650 --> 00:04:38,568
that you're recognized
as a man in the eyes of God...
117
00:04:38,569 --> 00:04:41,196
before you die,
which feels soon.
118
00:04:41,197 --> 00:04:42,572
So, tomorrow night,
119
00:04:42,573 --> 00:04:45,534
we're holding
your Constellatio Celebratio!
120
00:04:45,535 --> 00:04:47,369
Pretty sure God
already made me a man.
121
00:04:47,370 --> 00:04:48,996
Like, very rapidly.
122
00:04:48,997 --> 00:04:51,373
But he didn't make you
a citizen.
123
00:04:51,374 --> 00:04:52,541
This will.
124
00:04:52,542 --> 00:04:54,626
And once you join our society,
125
00:04:54,627 --> 00:04:56,753
you'll get access
to our knowledge,
126
00:04:56,754 --> 00:04:58,880
our history...
Our hypercoal?
127
00:04:58,881 --> 00:05:00,340
Well, sure.
128
00:05:00,341 --> 00:05:02,384
You'd get a key
to the vault like every citizen.
129
00:05:02,385 --> 00:05:04,553
You see, son,
we're very, very rich.
130
00:05:04,554 --> 00:05:06,513
Wow. Okay, yeah.
Let's, uh...
131
00:05:06,514 --> 00:05:09,391
Let's Constellatio this up.
I-I'm in!
132
00:05:09,392 --> 00:05:11,601
Ahh, that's the spirit!
Come on, son.
133
00:05:11,602 --> 00:05:13,353
Let's get you a big lollipop
134
00:05:13,354 --> 00:05:15,147
and dress you
like a little sailor.
135
00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:17,733
Ugh! How much shit is there?
136
00:05:17,734 --> 00:05:19,901
They've only been
awake for five hours.
137
00:05:19,902 --> 00:05:21,862
Grub time, Chachaco!
138
00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:23,739
Hurry.
We only got eight minutes.
139
00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:24,866
Great.
140
00:05:25,700 --> 00:05:27,909
Man, cryo-sleep, huh?
141
00:05:27,910 --> 00:05:30,078
Guess I forgot
how bad the food was.
142
00:05:30,079 --> 00:05:32,247
Yeah, wish I could forget.
143
00:05:32,248 --> 00:05:33,415
Tastes like lumpy piss.
144
00:05:33,416 --> 00:05:34,458
Aah!
145
00:05:34,459 --> 00:05:35,751
Which I love!
146
00:05:35,752 --> 00:05:37,627
Love piss.
Look at me eat it up.
147
00:05:37,628 --> 00:05:40,255
This gruel,
it's got energy, lumps,
148
00:05:40,256 --> 00:05:41,840
all the things a Makey needs.
149
00:05:41,841 --> 00:05:44,593
Um, why do
we call ourselves that again?
150
00:05:44,594 --> 00:05:47,137
Wow, cryo really took it
outta you, huh?
151
00:05:47,138 --> 00:05:48,680
They gave us that term.
152
00:05:48,681 --> 00:05:51,433
'Cause we "make" it
all possible.
153
00:05:51,434 --> 00:05:53,185
I-If we're Makeys,
154
00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:55,437
may... may... maybe
that makes them "Takeys."
155
00:05:55,438 --> 00:05:56,730
Ha ha.
156
00:05:56,731 --> 00:05:58,273
Did you not just get
complio-shocked?
157
00:05:58,274 --> 00:05:59,608
Oh... yeah.
158
00:05:59,609 --> 00:06:02,110
Y-Y-You learn to take the pain.
Heh.
159
00:06:02,111 --> 00:06:03,278
- Whoa!
- Bad-ass!
160
00:06:03,279 --> 00:06:05,781
Chachaco's hard-core.
161
00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:07,699
Mm.
162
00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:09,701
Rick?! W-Where the hell
have you been?
163
00:06:09,702 --> 00:06:12,454
Morty! Great news.
It's all going as planned.
164
00:06:12,455 --> 00:06:14,456
We didn't have a plan!
We do now.
165
00:06:14,457 --> 00:06:16,958
These people, Morty,
they're golden retrievers.
166
00:06:16,959 --> 00:06:19,836
No natural predators, totally
softened by generational wealth.
167
00:06:19,837 --> 00:06:21,671
Tomorrow they're throwing me
some kind
168
00:06:21,672 --> 00:06:23,632
of "becoming a man" thing and
just giving me the hypercoal.
169
00:06:23,633 --> 00:06:25,717
Who cares?!
Get me outta here!
170
00:06:25,718 --> 00:06:27,761
I-I'm literally scooping shit
by hand!
171
00:06:27,762 --> 00:06:29,471
Good. You made your bed,
lay in it.
172
00:06:29,472 --> 00:06:31,431
Gimme the car keys!
No! We're not leaving!
173
00:06:31,432 --> 00:06:32,641
Yes, we are, you greedy shit!
174
00:06:32,642 --> 00:06:34,518
Damn! Chachaco's giving
175
00:06:34,519 --> 00:06:36,144
that old rich kid
a piece of his mind!
176
00:06:36,145 --> 00:06:37,312
Aah! Oh!
177
00:06:37,313 --> 00:06:38,730
Give them to me, you Takey scum!
178
00:06:38,731 --> 00:06:40,440
Hey! Leave our son alone!
179
00:06:40,441 --> 00:06:42,401
Your son sucks!
Ugh!
180
00:06:42,402 --> 00:06:43,527
Chachaco, are you crazy?!
181
00:06:43,528 --> 00:06:45,278
Get back here!
182
00:06:45,279 --> 00:06:47,114
We'll be speaking
to your manager!
183
00:06:47,115 --> 00:06:50,033
No, no. It's fine.
Just jealous poor people.
184
00:06:50,034 --> 00:06:51,576
Ungrateful monsters!
185
00:06:51,577 --> 00:06:53,120
Impatient, too!
186
00:06:54,288 --> 00:06:56,164
Holy shit.
Are you crazy?
187
00:06:56,165 --> 00:06:57,499
We're all gonna get it now!
188
00:06:57,500 --> 00:06:59,209
What the hell got
into you, Chachaco?!
189
00:06:59,210 --> 00:07:00,919
He's an asshole.
190
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:02,003
Okay, seriously.
191
00:07:02,004 --> 00:07:03,588
How are you not getting zapped?
192
00:07:03,589 --> 00:07:06,174
Ow! Hey!
Something's up with his chip.
193
00:07:06,175 --> 00:07:07,342
He don't got one!
194
00:07:07,343 --> 00:07:08,510
- Oh!
- No chip?!
195
00:07:08,511 --> 00:07:10,011
Um, I-I took it out.
196
00:07:10,012 --> 00:07:11,638
They said taking the chips out
would kill us.
197
00:07:11,639 --> 00:07:13,598
Chachaco is living proof
it won't.
198
00:07:13,599 --> 00:07:15,183
Wait! Wait! Stop!
199
00:07:16,227 --> 00:07:19,187
Chachaco killed Tibs!
200
00:07:19,188 --> 00:07:20,480
Should we tell someone?
201
00:07:20,481 --> 00:07:21,898
Listen, I'm not who you...
202
00:07:24,652 --> 00:07:27,446
Chachaco, you're an idiot.
203
00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:30,198
And a goddamn hero!
204
00:07:30,199 --> 00:07:31,575
Um, thanks...
205
00:07:31,576 --> 00:07:33,743
Tell the Makeys to gather.
206
00:07:33,744 --> 00:07:36,204
It's time to show the Takeys
who really runs this ship.
207
00:07:36,205 --> 00:07:39,040
And after you finish
sipping from the final chalice,
208
00:07:39,041 --> 00:07:42,127
the sacred light
will shine down upon you.
209
00:07:42,128 --> 00:07:45,380
You've grown so much.
We are so proud of you.
210
00:07:45,381 --> 00:07:48,049
Jimmy, I used to dread
giving this you.
211
00:07:48,050 --> 00:07:50,927
It's the most precious thing
in our family
212
00:07:50,928 --> 00:07:53,054
and frankly you were a brat.
213
00:07:53,055 --> 00:07:55,432
But there's nothing
like a fluke cryopod accident
214
00:07:55,433 --> 00:07:57,934
to show you what really matters.
215
00:07:57,935 --> 00:08:00,562
It's your father's
Constellatio suit,
216
00:08:00,563 --> 00:08:03,815
from his father,
and his father before him.
217
00:08:03,816 --> 00:08:06,067
Oh, that's not necessary.
218
00:08:06,068 --> 00:08:07,652
I'm... I'm still a brat.
219
00:08:07,653 --> 00:08:11,406
I'm just glad
we're getting to do this.
220
00:08:11,407 --> 00:08:13,241
We love you, son.
221
00:08:13,242 --> 00:08:14,576
We love you.
222
00:08:14,577 --> 00:08:17,787
Ha ha. Yeah.
L-L-Love you guys, too.
223
00:08:17,788 --> 00:08:20,582
You've never said that before.
Honey, he loves us!
224
00:08:20,583 --> 00:08:23,251
I'm so glad you said it
before you die of old age!
225
00:08:23,252 --> 00:08:24,836
My boy!
226
00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:28,632
Oh, Jimmy!
227
00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:34,804
Fresh planet, fresh start.
228
00:08:34,805 --> 00:08:36,598
Fresh planet, fresh start.
229
00:08:36,599 --> 00:08:38,391
We have a slogan now?
Catchy, huh?
230
00:08:38,392 --> 00:08:40,185
Tibs is looking for ya.
Great cover, by the way...
231
00:08:40,186 --> 00:08:42,772
acting like nothin's happening.
232
00:08:45,274 --> 00:08:46,441
General Chachaco!
233
00:08:46,442 --> 00:08:47,776
General?
234
00:08:47,777 --> 00:08:49,444
Fresh planet, fresh start!
235
00:08:49,445 --> 00:08:52,489
You taught us the only way
to beat those rich bastards
236
00:08:52,490 --> 00:08:54,449
is to actually beat them.
237
00:08:54,450 --> 00:08:56,660
Check out this.
It's a Bang-Bang.
238
00:08:56,661 --> 00:08:59,120
To bang people's heads in.
My invention.
239
00:08:59,121 --> 00:09:01,957
Yeeeeah. Maybe we put a pin
in the Bang-Bang
240
00:09:01,958 --> 00:09:04,334
and peacefully ask
for some change-change?
241
00:09:04,335 --> 00:09:06,836
What am I saying?
They put chips in your heads.
242
00:09:06,837 --> 00:09:09,047
Phew. For a second,
you sounded like Spoogler.
243
00:09:09,048 --> 00:09:10,840
Ha ha.
Yeah, w-where is Spoogler?
244
00:09:10,841 --> 00:09:12,551
Oh, my God!
245
00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:15,887
Spoogler's out there waiting
to hear both sides of the issue.
246
00:09:15,888 --> 00:09:18,265
Meanwhile, we're gonna
take out the Takeys.
247
00:09:18,266 --> 00:09:20,058
Ah, geez, I-I-I don't know.
248
00:09:20,059 --> 00:09:22,143
We... We got that old kid's
party tomorrow.
249
00:09:22,144 --> 00:09:24,938
That's brilliant, General!
Attack during the party.
250
00:09:24,939 --> 00:09:26,898
Not... Not quite
what I was pitching.
251
00:09:26,899 --> 00:09:30,402
Those Takeys are gonna regret
the day they messed with you!
252
00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:32,487
We...
We got a hand thing now?
253
00:09:32,488 --> 00:09:34,030
For the resistance.
254
00:09:34,031 --> 00:09:36,992
T-This feels too long
for a secret handshake.
255
00:09:36,993 --> 00:09:38,326
Aah!
256
00:09:38,327 --> 00:09:40,996
Constellatio!
257
00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:42,789
The crew is so proud
of you, Jimmy.
258
00:09:42,790 --> 00:09:44,165
You've really taken
259
00:09:44,166 --> 00:09:46,209
your grossly shortened
life-span in stride.
260
00:09:46,210 --> 00:09:48,920
I couldn't think of two
better parents to die before.
261
00:09:48,921 --> 00:09:50,213
Aww, get over here, ya goofball!
262
00:09:50,214 --> 00:09:52,674
Hey, my hair!
I just put gel in!
263
00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:02,851
Ah, geez.
264
00:10:02,852 --> 00:10:04,603
Father, we gotta delay
the ceremony.
265
00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:06,479
Something bad
is going to happen.
266
00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:07,981
I sure hope so.
267
00:10:07,982 --> 00:10:10,734
Great idea to stick pins
in the Bang-Bangs.
268
00:10:12,194 --> 00:10:13,737
People of Plociff,
269
00:10:13,738 --> 00:10:16,406
tonight young James Jamerson
ascends to manhood.
270
00:10:16,407 --> 00:10:19,909
Hell yeah! Gonna be a man!
271
00:10:19,910 --> 00:10:21,328
Rick, we really gotta go now.
272
00:10:21,329 --> 00:10:23,330
Aah!
Don't ruin this for these people.
273
00:10:23,331 --> 00:10:27,792
Party people!
Let's hit those chalices!
274
00:10:27,793 --> 00:10:29,044
We love it, son!
275
00:10:29,045 --> 00:10:30,337
Proud of you!
276
00:10:32,048 --> 00:10:34,716
Alright, Father. Gimme the
light. I'll take it from here.
277
00:10:34,717 --> 00:10:36,885
How 'bout you take this
in your Takey neck?!
278
00:10:36,886 --> 00:10:38,386
Watch out!
Whoa!
279
00:10:38,387 --> 00:10:39,387
Going off script, padre.
280
00:10:39,388 --> 00:10:41,222
Party's over, Takeys!
281
00:10:41,223 --> 00:10:42,724
Why isn't she complying?
282
00:10:42,725 --> 00:10:44,225
It's not working!
283
00:10:44,226 --> 00:10:46,061
Fresh planet, fresh start!
284
00:10:48,564 --> 00:10:49,981
Aah!
285
00:10:49,982 --> 00:10:51,441
- Yah!
- Bang-bang!
286
00:10:51,442 --> 00:10:54,277
Wait! You can't attack them!
They're helpless.
287
00:10:54,278 --> 00:10:57,072
They don't even know
that food comes from somewhere.
288
00:10:58,532 --> 00:11:01,576
We gotta get to someplace safe.
L-Like the vault.
289
00:11:01,577 --> 00:11:03,620
Gimme that!
You got it, boss!
290
00:11:05,581 --> 00:11:06,748
My bad.
291
00:11:06,749 --> 00:11:07,916
Morty. Change of plans.
292
00:11:07,917 --> 00:11:10,210
Take me to the vault!
Now!
293
00:11:10,211 --> 00:11:12,879
- Please don't hurt our boy!
- Just do what he says.
294
00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:14,339
But if this deranged janitor
kidnaps me
295
00:11:14,340 --> 00:11:16,299
and steals everything
from this vault,
296
00:11:16,300 --> 00:11:18,885
j-just know you two
were great parents.
297
00:11:18,886 --> 00:11:21,930
Really unreasonably trusting.
Maybe too trusting.
298
00:11:21,931 --> 00:11:23,723
Honey, what are
you talking about?
299
00:11:23,724 --> 00:11:26,267
Open that safe,
or you're worm food!
300
00:11:28,771 --> 00:11:31,147
Greetings, Doug Jamerson.
301
00:11:31,148 --> 00:11:33,274
Thank you for being rich.
302
00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:40,240
Jesus, Morty!
303
00:11:40,241 --> 00:11:41,866
Doug and Karen's only crime
is naively benefiting
304
00:11:41,867 --> 00:11:43,702
from systemic inequity.
305
00:11:43,703 --> 00:11:45,787
Just grab the loot,
you big baby!
306
00:11:45,788 --> 00:11:47,956
Interesting.
307
00:11:47,957 --> 00:11:50,500
Wait, what?!
You... You gotta be kidding me!
308
00:11:50,501 --> 00:11:52,127
They robbed us!
309
00:11:52,128 --> 00:11:54,003
The rich kid and the janitor
310
00:11:54,004 --> 00:11:56,089
put aside their differences
to fuck us over!
311
00:11:56,090 --> 00:11:58,133
Let's follow their example.
312
00:11:58,134 --> 00:11:59,509
Mob justice!
313
00:11:59,510 --> 00:12:01,178
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
314
00:12:02,138 --> 00:12:04,597
- Hold on a second!
- We can explain!
315
00:12:04,598 --> 00:12:05,890
- Where's our money?!
- Where's our money?!
316
00:12:05,891 --> 00:12:07,767
We told you...
We don't know.
317
00:12:07,768 --> 00:12:10,145
You manipulated a working class
to rise against a ruling class.
318
00:12:10,146 --> 00:12:12,814
I was right, Chachaco...
You are funny,
319
00:12:12,815 --> 00:12:14,566
but not in the "ha ha" way.
320
00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:16,609
In the bad way, like
"is my dog sitting like that
321
00:12:16,610 --> 00:12:18,570
because he's watching TV with us
322
00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:20,697
or is he 'expressing
his anal glands'" funny.
323
00:12:20,698 --> 00:12:22,615
Oof. Long walk.
324
00:12:22,616 --> 00:12:25,368
Under the Laws of Space,
I sentence you to death.
325
00:12:25,369 --> 00:12:27,620
Wait! Jimmy couldn't
have done this!
326
00:12:27,621 --> 00:12:29,581
I opened the safe
and it was empty.
327
00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:30,999
Sorry, Doug.
328
00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:32,584
We checked the vault's log,
and the last person
329
00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:35,754
to access it was, in fact,
Jimmy Jamerson.
330
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:40,049
That's not possible.
Jimmy Jamerson is dead.
331
00:12:42,052 --> 00:12:43,845
I don't understand.
332
00:12:43,846 --> 00:12:46,639
Karen, let me make this as
gentle as I can... We're aliens.
333
00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:49,267
Come on, let's go see
your dead son's bones.
334
00:12:50,436 --> 00:12:51,936
Bones?!
335
00:12:51,937 --> 00:12:54,898
Oh, shit. Monkey bones.
Was Jimmy a monkey?
336
00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:57,150
Lizzy! No!
I thought you escaped!
337
00:12:57,151 --> 00:12:59,194
What the hell is going on?!
338
00:12:59,195 --> 00:13:00,320
I'm a zoologist.
339
00:13:00,321 --> 00:13:01,613
Not you!
340
00:13:04,074 --> 00:13:05,033
Jimmy?
341
00:13:05,034 --> 00:13:07,118
And apparently, Guffy Chachaco.
342
00:13:07,119 --> 00:13:09,120
They thought I was that guy?!
343
00:13:09,121 --> 00:13:10,622
These two hacked
the vault 30 minutes
344
00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:12,749
after you all
started hypersleep.
345
00:13:12,750 --> 00:13:14,793
So Jimmy's still alive?
346
00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:16,753
Fuck him!
Where the hell is our money?!
347
00:13:16,754 --> 00:13:18,505
They bought a yacht.
It's on Blackjack 9.
348
00:13:18,506 --> 00:13:20,048
They weren't very discreet.
349
00:13:20,049 --> 00:13:21,424
Why would they be?
350
00:13:21,425 --> 00:13:23,468
They thought you'd be asleep
for the next 200 years.
351
00:13:23,469 --> 00:13:25,094
Little asshole.
352
00:13:25,095 --> 00:13:27,305
When you woke up,
we thought Jimmy'd grown
353
00:13:27,306 --> 00:13:28,807
into a thoughtful, kind man.
354
00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:30,350
We were so happy.
This guy?
355
00:13:30,351 --> 00:13:32,143
They were nice,
so I was nice back.
356
00:13:32,144 --> 00:13:33,436
Try it sometime, Morty.
357
00:13:33,437 --> 00:13:35,605
Sorry to be the "money" guy,
358
00:13:35,606 --> 00:13:37,607
but our cash is
on a casino planet
359
00:13:37,608 --> 00:13:40,068
and we're all
just standing here?!
360
00:13:40,069 --> 00:13:42,070
Wait! Wait!
361
00:13:42,071 --> 00:13:44,823
All that money did is tear you
apart... from your friends,
362
00:13:44,824 --> 00:13:47,492
your neighbors,
even your old home.
363
00:13:47,493 --> 00:13:50,119
But now you can go to
a whole new world as equals.
364
00:13:50,120 --> 00:13:51,788
A place where you can live...
365
00:13:51,789 --> 00:13:53,414
Son of a bitch.
They're already gone.
366
00:13:53,415 --> 00:13:56,626
Damn it. I was about
to tie it all together.
367
00:13:56,627 --> 00:13:58,545
Space race, Morty! Let's go!
368
00:13:58,546 --> 00:14:01,506
Gonna pay off med school, baby!
369
00:14:01,507 --> 00:14:03,008
Aah!
Time of death is now!
370
00:14:04,051 --> 00:14:05,134
Hey!
371
00:14:11,016 --> 00:14:13,518
T-They're gonna kill
each other for that money, Rick!
372
00:14:13,519 --> 00:14:14,853
Why didn't we take your car?!
373
00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:16,563
Constellatio gift
from a rich uncle.
374
00:14:16,564 --> 00:14:18,022
Be rude not to take it.
375
00:14:18,023 --> 00:14:21,234
Ha ha!
I never believed in God!
376
00:14:21,235 --> 00:14:23,194
I do believe in God!
I do believe in God!
377
00:14:28,826 --> 00:14:30,869
Chachaco, when I met you,
378
00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:32,453
you were scooping
hot steamers out of a pipe.
379
00:14:32,454 --> 00:14:34,414
So I saved you.
380
00:14:34,415 --> 00:14:37,542
Now blow some working-class
luck on these dice, amigo.
381
00:14:38,669 --> 00:14:40,670
Wa-ho! Jimmy!
382
00:14:40,671 --> 00:14:42,422
All the money goes
to the 11-year-old
383
00:14:42,423 --> 00:14:44,090
and his best friend.
- Yeah!
384
00:14:44,091 --> 00:14:45,383
Hey, turn up the TV.
385
00:14:45,384 --> 00:14:47,385
A massive space race
is under way,
386
00:14:47,386 --> 00:14:50,054
apparently chasing down a large
fortune of stolen money.
387
00:14:50,055 --> 00:14:52,307
Glizop is live with the story.
Glizop?
388
00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:55,310
Tim, I'm here at the scene,
where I'm gonna be rich!
389
00:14:55,311 --> 00:14:58,021
I quit! Aah! Snap!
390
00:14:58,022 --> 00:15:00,231
Wish he didn't do that.
Those mics are expensive.
391
00:15:00,232 --> 00:15:03,943
In any case, here's a picture
of the suspected thieves.
392
00:15:03,944 --> 00:15:06,738
Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Oh, shit.
Shit! Oh, man! Oh, God!
393
00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:12,285
Ah, farts!
It's my dumb parents!
394
00:15:12,286 --> 00:15:15,039
Punch it, Chachaco!
Load up the hypercoal!
395
00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:23,421
Hey! I gotta pay for those!
396
00:15:23,422 --> 00:15:25,506
And soon I can!
397
00:15:33,766 --> 00:15:34,891
Son of a bitch!
398
00:15:34,892 --> 00:15:36,184
You're a terrible doctor!
399
00:15:36,185 --> 00:15:37,310
Tell that to my money!
400
00:15:37,311 --> 00:15:38,770
I will!
401
00:15:44,777 --> 00:15:46,611
That money can't bring back
Lizzy,
402
00:15:46,612 --> 00:15:49,822
but it can buy another monkey
that I will also name Lizzy.
403
00:15:55,454 --> 00:15:57,830
Thank you, New Lizzy.
404
00:16:04,672 --> 00:16:07,507
I'm driving the ship!
405
00:16:07,508 --> 00:16:09,467
I'm finally driving the ship!
406
00:16:09,468 --> 00:16:13,930
Uhhhhhh! Riiiiiick!
407
00:16:13,931 --> 00:16:16,683
Okay.
Think he found a shortcut?
408
00:16:16,684 --> 00:16:18,267
No, he's just nuts.
409
00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:26,734
My favorite part of the job...
escalating situations.
410
00:16:31,657 --> 00:16:33,992
Hey!
The race hasn't started yet!
411
00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:35,827
Kinda bummed to leave
that race behind.
412
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:37,453
Thought we'd end up winning it
by accident.
413
00:16:37,454 --> 00:16:39,914
Oh! Chicken coop cluster!
414
00:16:39,915 --> 00:16:41,624
It's all coops!
Wall-to-wall coops!
415
00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:46,754
Why would you roll
the windows down?
416
00:16:46,755 --> 00:16:48,214
I wanted the full experience.
417
00:16:53,971 --> 00:16:56,097
You have the right
to remain poor!
418
00:16:56,098 --> 00:16:57,807
You have the right to shut up!
419
00:16:57,808 --> 00:17:00,268
Rick, there's too many of 'em!
Smoke 'em if you got 'em!
420
00:17:02,938 --> 00:17:04,022
Oh, man!
They're on our ass!
421
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:07,483
I'll eat dirt for pennies.
422
00:17:07,484 --> 00:17:10,361
Why is this old dude
wearing my Constellatio suit?!
423
00:17:10,362 --> 00:17:12,071
You don't deserve
Karen and Doug!
424
00:17:12,072 --> 00:17:14,240
Eat a dick!
425
00:17:14,241 --> 00:17:17,244
Ow! Blue-collar guys
always have an arm.
426
00:17:19,705 --> 00:17:21,873
Oh, I'm gonna be so grounded!
427
00:17:21,874 --> 00:17:24,208
We prepared for this, Jimmy.
428
00:17:24,209 --> 00:17:26,377
Kiss the back of my head.
429
00:17:27,838 --> 00:17:29,338
You little brat!
430
00:17:29,339 --> 00:17:31,549
You can't hit me!
I'm a kid!
431
00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:33,551
I can't hit you.
You're old.
432
00:17:37,222 --> 00:17:39,891
Back!
433
00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:41,893
I'd hold on to something, Rick.
434
00:17:41,894 --> 00:17:43,394
You wouldn't.
435
00:17:48,025 --> 00:17:50,568
I-I can reach it!
Leave it, Guffy!
436
00:17:50,569 --> 00:17:52,695
We'll steal more!
437
00:17:52,696 --> 00:17:55,490
Nooo!
438
00:17:58,577 --> 00:18:00,578
God damn it!
We were right there!
439
00:18:00,579 --> 00:18:02,455
These people will
never stop killing each other
440
00:18:02,456 --> 00:18:03,664
for this dumb shit.
441
00:18:03,665 --> 00:18:05,083
It's over, Rick.
442
00:18:05,084 --> 00:18:08,586
Chachaco, you funny bastard.
443
00:18:08,587 --> 00:18:09,962
All our wealth...
444
00:18:09,963 --> 00:18:11,297
It's gone.
445
00:18:11,298 --> 00:18:14,968
Ah, screw it.
I've come this far.
446
00:18:16,178 --> 00:18:17,845
What's that lunatic doing?!
447
00:18:17,846 --> 00:18:19,722
Taking our money!
448
00:18:35,864 --> 00:18:37,323
I made it way worse.
449
00:18:37,324 --> 00:18:40,118
Jimmy!
You're in big trouble, mister!
450
00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:42,286
How could you rob
your own parents?!
451
00:18:44,289 --> 00:18:46,249
I'm sorry!
452
00:18:46,250 --> 00:18:48,126
I thought it'd be funny
if you guys woke up
453
00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:50,086
and thought I turned into
a monkey.
454
00:18:50,087 --> 00:18:52,547
- In 200 years?!
- You're a piece of shit!
455
00:18:52,548 --> 00:18:53,673
You are a piece of shit.
456
00:18:53,674 --> 00:18:55,216
Stay out of this, fake son!
457
00:18:55,217 --> 00:18:58,386
Ohh, Jimmy, you're a fuck up.
458
00:18:58,387 --> 00:19:01,055
But we always threw cash
at the problem.
459
00:19:01,056 --> 00:19:02,849
Now that we just have
these gold bars,
460
00:19:02,850 --> 00:19:04,851
we'll have to throw ourselves.
461
00:19:04,852 --> 00:19:09,189
Dad? I owe money
to some baaad people.
462
00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:14,110
I set the navigation
to a nearby inhabitable planet.
463
00:19:14,111 --> 00:19:16,654
Also gave everyone
a compliance chip.
464
00:19:16,655 --> 00:19:18,990
Y-You can finally get
that fresh start.
465
00:19:18,991 --> 00:19:21,450
We'll be fine as long
as these poor idiots don't...
466
00:19:22,494 --> 00:19:24,996
Not so fun, is it, you Takey?
Aah!
467
00:19:24,997 --> 00:19:27,707
And if you remove those chips,
you will die.
468
00:19:27,708 --> 00:19:30,084
Thanks... uh, Rick, right?
469
00:19:30,085 --> 00:19:33,004
Yeah. Sorry for pretending
to be a deformed version
470
00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:34,922
of your dead son
and try to rob you.
471
00:19:34,923 --> 00:19:36,174
That's pretty messed up
in hindsight.
472
00:19:36,175 --> 00:19:37,800
It's messed up in any sight.
473
00:19:37,801 --> 00:19:40,678
Rick, in only two days,
you were a better son
474
00:19:40,679 --> 00:19:41,888
than Jimmy ever was.
475
00:19:41,889 --> 00:19:43,014
I can hear you!
476
00:19:43,015 --> 00:19:44,265
Shut up, Jimmy! Aah!
477
00:19:44,266 --> 00:19:45,975
Yeah, shut
your fucking mouth! Aah!
478
00:19:45,976 --> 00:19:48,519
Using all our money to pay off
your goddamn loan sharks!
479
00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:50,396
You suck, Jimmy!
480
00:19:50,397 --> 00:19:51,731
Ah, I wish you were never born!
We're putting you up for adoption!
481
00:19:52,900 --> 00:19:54,150
You're a loser! Aah!
482
00:19:54,151 --> 00:19:56,569
Welp.
The treasure is gone.
483
00:19:56,570 --> 00:19:59,864
And there were massive
casualties on both sides.
484
00:19:59,865 --> 00:20:02,241
Still, I think we did good.
485
00:20:02,242 --> 00:20:04,702
Right?
486
00:20:04,703 --> 00:20:06,746
Rick? Y-You okay?
487
00:20:06,747 --> 00:20:08,497
Guess it's true...
488
00:20:08,498 --> 00:20:10,875
You can choose your friends, but
you can't choose your family.
489
00:20:10,876 --> 00:20:12,335
But I am family.
490
00:20:12,336 --> 00:20:13,920
And you did choose me.
491
00:20:13,921 --> 00:20:15,546
Yeah, it's a stupid quote.
492
00:20:15,547 --> 00:20:19,634
Cryo-ship detected.
Class... medical.
493
00:20:19,635 --> 00:20:23,221
They typically have some
pretty good drugs in those.
494
00:20:23,222 --> 00:20:25,223
Okay.
But five minutes, tops.
495
00:20:25,224 --> 00:20:27,391
And y-you can't hog
all the drugs this time.
496
00:20:27,392 --> 00:20:28,726
Sold!
497
00:21:03,595 --> 00:21:05,263
5 million to call.
498
00:21:05,264 --> 00:21:07,431
New Lizzy, think about this.
499
00:21:07,432 --> 00:21:10,142
That's all our money.
We were gonna start a new life.
500
00:21:12,020 --> 00:21:15,064
Ah, Jesus,
you dumb fucking monkey.
501
00:21:15,065 --> 00:21:17,233
Three of a kind
to the lizard man.
502
00:21:17,234 --> 00:21:19,860
And a full house for the monkey!
503
00:21:19,861 --> 00:21:22,780
New Lizzy! Holy fuck,
I always knew you could do it.
504
00:21:22,781 --> 00:21:24,407
God, I love you!
505
00:21:25,951 --> 00:21:29,246
It's days like these that
remind me why I got into this.
506
00:21:31,039 --> 00:21:32,666
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36593
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