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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,219 --> 00:00:06,346 Jerry: ♪ Deck the house with Easter baskets ♪ 2 00:00:06,347 --> 00:00:09,016 ♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la, eggs ♪ 3 00:00:09,017 --> 00:00:12,060 ♪ Plastic grass and chocolate rabbits ♪ 4 00:00:12,061 --> 00:00:15,022 ♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, marshmallow bird ♪ 5 00:00:15,023 --> 00:00:17,941 ♪ Easter is the time for giving ♪ 6 00:00:17,942 --> 00:00:20,986 ♪ Fa-la-la-la-la-la, Easter milk ♪ 7 00:00:20,987 --> 00:00:23,572 Hey, bud, wanna decorate some Easter baskets 8 00:00:23,573 --> 00:00:24,823 with your old man? 9 00:00:24,824 --> 00:00:26,700 What? No. I-I'm streaming on Twitch. 10 00:00:26,701 --> 00:00:28,410 "Fortnite" just added JFK. 11 00:00:28,411 --> 00:00:31,246 Maybe we could fill some baskets with jelly beans, 12 00:00:31,247 --> 00:00:32,914 you know, get our tradition on? 13 00:00:32,915 --> 00:00:35,083 I've gotta pack for spring break. 14 00:00:35,084 --> 00:00:36,752 Also, Jelly Bean is a slur. 15 00:00:36,753 --> 00:00:39,087 Come on, Beth. The kids are growing up. 16 00:00:39,088 --> 00:00:41,923 Maybe you and I can hide some eggs one last time? 17 00:00:41,924 --> 00:00:44,426 I don't need the house smelling like egg farts, Jerry. 18 00:00:44,427 --> 00:00:46,595 Rick. Oh... 19 00:00:46,596 --> 00:00:48,972 You know what? Never mind. 20 00:00:48,973 --> 00:00:52,309 Doesn't anyone celebrate Easter anymore? 21 00:00:52,310 --> 00:00:54,770 I-I don't wanna force people to go to church or anything, but-- 22 00:00:54,771 --> 00:00:56,605 Can you even tell me what Easter is about? 23 00:00:56,606 --> 00:00:58,315 It's when Christ was born. 24 00:00:58,316 --> 00:01:00,650 Or was murdered, maybe. I dunno. 25 00:01:00,651 --> 00:01:03,445 But we eat candy to remember. It's important. 26 00:01:03,446 --> 00:01:04,946 Jerry, if it wasn't for the aisle at Costco, 27 00:01:04,947 --> 00:01:06,448 you wouldn't even know it was happening. 28 00:01:06,449 --> 00:01:07,616 Yeah, Dad. 29 00:01:07,617 --> 00:01:09,117 Example-- When's Christmas? 30 00:01:09,118 --> 00:01:10,327 December 25th. 31 00:01:10,328 --> 00:01:12,120 And what's today's date? 32 00:01:12,121 --> 00:01:14,748 Uh, Ap-Ap-April. 33 00:01:14,749 --> 00:01:16,958 Look, I want to be a good dad, okay? 34 00:01:16,959 --> 00:01:18,585 And-- And I know that you gotta 35 00:01:18,586 --> 00:01:20,128 go straight up the middle to do that. 36 00:01:20,129 --> 00:01:23,090 If Easter is fading from our family, that's bad. 37 00:01:23,091 --> 00:01:26,928 So, who's coming with me to get some egg dye? 38 00:01:30,556 --> 00:01:33,726 Guess that just means more candy for Jer. 39 00:01:35,144 --> 00:01:37,479 [ Humming "Deck the Halls" ] 40 00:01:37,480 --> 00:01:39,981 ♪ Jerry makes an egg, and it is nice ♪ 41 00:01:39,982 --> 00:01:41,149 Aaah! 42 00:01:41,150 --> 00:01:43,152 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 43 00:01:44,821 --> 00:01:48,865 Oh, my God, are you ok-- Ahhhghh! 44 00:01:48,866 --> 00:01:52,702 Oh, my God, what a terrible time to have eaten so much candy. 45 00:01:52,703 --> 00:01:54,329 Arghhhh! 46 00:01:54,330 --> 00:01:55,747 Oh, I'm sorry. 47 00:01:55,748 --> 00:01:57,416 I'm not trying to kill you with vomit! 48 00:01:57,417 --> 00:02:00,001 I'm just so scared. Agghh! 49 00:02:00,002 --> 00:02:28,989 {\an8}♪ 50 00:02:28,990 --> 00:02:31,701 [ Electricity zapping ] 51 00:02:33,953 --> 00:02:36,872 {\an8}Please, please tell me this isn't who I think it is. 52 00:02:36,873 --> 00:02:39,416 {\an8}Well, do you know of any other bipedal humanoid rabbits? 53 00:02:39,417 --> 00:02:41,835 {\an8}Oh, my God, I killed the Easter Bunny. 54 00:02:41,836 --> 00:02:43,879 {\an8}Along with the hopes and dreams of children everywhere. 55 00:02:43,880 --> 00:02:46,506 {\an8}Summer. Share those jokes with me in private. 56 00:02:46,507 --> 00:02:47,841 {\an8}Rick, what does this mean? 57 00:02:47,842 --> 00:02:50,051 {\an8}Not sure. I have a few questions. 58 00:02:50,052 --> 00:02:51,845 {\an8}Did you puke on it to try and kill it? 59 00:02:51,846 --> 00:02:54,347 {\an8}No! {\an8}I have no more questions. 60 00:02:54,348 --> 00:02:55,682 {\an8}Huh. 61 00:02:55,683 --> 00:02:58,268 {\an8}This necklace is German, 13th century. 62 00:02:58,269 --> 00:02:59,978 {\an8}Shows permafrost damage and-- 63 00:02:59,979 --> 00:03:02,147 {\an8}Feel my heart. It's beating a million beats per second! 64 00:03:02,148 --> 00:03:04,649 {\an8}Sweetie, calm down. Have a glass of water. 65 00:03:04,650 --> 00:03:06,067 {\an8}Breathe. {\an8}Okay, okay. 66 00:03:06,068 --> 00:03:08,111 {\an8}Whew, you're right. It's fine. 67 00:03:08,112 --> 00:03:09,906 {\an8}[ Sighs ] 68 00:03:12,742 --> 00:03:14,660 {\an8}[ Munching ] 69 00:03:15,411 --> 00:03:17,579 {\an8}Uh, Dad. {\an8}Mm! 70 00:03:17,580 --> 00:03:20,583 {\an8}Right, water. I came in here for water. 71 00:03:22,585 --> 00:03:23,835 {\an8}[ Coughing ] 72 00:03:23,836 --> 00:03:25,420 {\an8}Fucking glass doesn't work. 73 00:03:25,421 --> 00:03:27,297 {\an8}[ Grunts ] 74 00:03:27,298 --> 00:03:30,967 {\an8}[ Humming ] 75 00:03:30,968 --> 00:03:31,927 {\an8}[ Gulping ] 76 00:03:31,928 --> 00:03:33,887 {\an8}Dad, what is happening? 77 00:03:33,888 --> 00:03:36,765 {\an8}Well, for the first time ever, Jerry accomplished something. 78 00:03:36,766 --> 00:03:38,642 {\an8}We should remember him this way, in case we lose him. 79 00:03:38,643 --> 00:03:39,936 {\an8}Lose him? 80 00:03:42,605 --> 00:03:44,898 {\an8}Mutagenesis. Cellular transformation, 81 00:03:44,899 --> 00:03:47,150 metastatic spread, rapidly accelerating 82 00:03:47,151 --> 00:03:48,443 with a deadline of... 83 00:03:48,444 --> 00:03:49,819 48 hours from now. 84 00:03:49,820 --> 00:03:52,572 That's Easter. Unless it's next weekend? 85 00:03:52,573 --> 00:03:53,782 Doesn't anyone have a calendar app? 86 00:03:53,783 --> 00:03:54,908 I have holidays turned off. 87 00:03:54,909 --> 00:03:56,368 Oh, yeah, no, he-here it is. 88 00:03:56,369 --> 00:03:57,953 Google says it's this weekend. 89 00:03:57,954 --> 00:04:00,413 Well, I truly thought Easter was a zero holiday, 90 00:04:00,414 --> 00:04:02,123 but, Jerry, you've been... 91 00:04:02,124 --> 00:04:03,416 Easter Claused. 92 00:04:03,417 --> 00:04:04,960 Oh, no. 93 00:04:04,961 --> 00:04:05,877 Wait. What? 94 00:04:05,878 --> 00:04:07,212 Rick, that doesn't make sense. 95 00:04:07,213 --> 00:04:09,089 The title of the movie is based on the pun 96 00:04:09,090 --> 00:04:10,882 of Santa's last name. Did you understand what I meant? 97 00:04:10,883 --> 00:04:12,884 If so, then it made plenty of sense. 98 00:04:12,885 --> 00:04:13,969 Aah! 99 00:04:13,970 --> 00:04:15,512 {\an8}This is a mitogen deterrent, 100 00:04:15,513 --> 00:04:17,013 {\an8}should slow down the transformation. 101 00:04:17,014 --> 00:04:19,140 {\an8}Beth, you stay with Jerry. Morty, you're with me. 102 00:04:19,141 --> 00:04:20,850 {\an8}We're gonna Dan Brown that German necklace. 103 00:04:20,851 --> 00:04:22,811 {\an8}Hell yeah, E-Easter adventure! 104 00:04:22,812 --> 00:04:24,104 {\an8}Summer. {\an8}Daytona? 105 00:04:24,105 --> 00:04:25,897 {\an8}Exactly. Get shitfaced, go insane. 106 00:04:25,898 --> 00:04:27,983 {\an8}Here's a fake ID and a second alcohol stomach. 107 00:04:27,984 --> 00:04:29,818 {\an8}I want you to do some molly and throw up in a pool. 108 00:04:29,819 --> 00:04:31,611 {\an8}No, no. Don't. {\an8}I fuckin' love you, Grandpa Rick. 109 00:04:31,612 --> 00:04:33,113 {\an8}Come on, Morty, to the Alps! 110 00:04:33,114 --> 00:04:34,531 {\an8}Let's Indiana Jones! 111 00:04:34,532 --> 00:04:40,036 {\an8}♪ 112 00:04:40,037 --> 00:04:41,538 {\an8}Ah. Recent thaw. 113 00:04:41,539 --> 00:04:43,498 {\an8}This altitude should be permafrost. 114 00:04:43,499 --> 00:04:45,875 {\an8}God, I do not wanna say "climate change" on this show. 115 00:04:45,876 --> 00:04:47,502 {\an8}I don't know which way Zaslav voted. 116 00:04:47,503 --> 00:04:49,004 {\an8}You think that giant rabbit unfroze 117 00:04:49,005 --> 00:04:53,174 {\an8}because of SUVs and, uh... cig-cig-cigarettes? 118 00:04:53,175 --> 00:04:55,802 {\an8}Yes, Morty, it unfroze because of cigarettes. 119 00:04:55,803 --> 00:04:57,012 {\an8}You ever see "Iceman," Morty? 120 00:04:57,013 --> 00:04:58,471 {\an8}'80s flick? Timothy Hutton? 121 00:04:58,472 --> 00:05:00,432 {\an8}The '80s were forever ago, Rick. 122 00:05:00,433 --> 00:05:01,641 {\an8}"Encino Man"? 123 00:05:01,642 --> 00:05:02,892 {\an8}You're old. {\an8}You're old. 124 00:05:02,893 --> 00:05:04,185 {\an8}Fuck you, Morty. {\an8}Fuck you, Rick! 125 00:05:04,186 --> 00:05:05,562 {\an8}Eh, fuck you! You're old and gay. 126 00:05:05,563 --> 00:05:07,897 {\an8}You can't say that anymore! 127 00:05:07,898 --> 00:05:10,359 {\an8}Let's see if the locals know anything. 128 00:05:12,403 --> 00:05:15,363 {\an8}Whoa, ch-check out this Wicker Man-looking place. 129 00:05:15,364 --> 00:05:18,116 [ Speaking German ] 130 00:05:18,117 --> 00:05:20,702 German Easter is a little less chocolate-centric. 131 00:05:20,703 --> 00:05:21,995 Say what you want about America, 132 00:05:21,996 --> 00:05:23,538 but we get a few things right. 133 00:05:23,539 --> 00:05:26,041 [ Choral singing ] 134 00:05:26,042 --> 00:05:33,798 {\an8}♪ 135 00:05:33,799 --> 00:05:36,009 Whoa. It's a big Easter egg. 136 00:05:36,010 --> 00:05:37,844 Looks like it's from Andromeda. 137 00:05:37,845 --> 00:05:39,638 Why would aliens care about a holiday 138 00:05:39,639 --> 00:05:41,264 we don't even care about? 139 00:05:41,265 --> 00:05:43,767 I dunno, but we're not the only ones looking for answers. 140 00:05:43,768 --> 00:05:45,269 Check out these nerds. 141 00:05:46,062 --> 00:05:48,563 Aah! Aah! 142 00:05:48,564 --> 00:05:49,898 Space Christians? 143 00:05:49,899 --> 00:05:51,816 I-Isn't that a conflict of interest? 144 00:05:51,817 --> 00:05:53,693 Hey, don't scan me. I'll scan you. 145 00:05:53,694 --> 00:05:55,278 Easter Rabbit DNA. 146 00:05:55,279 --> 00:05:57,072 He's clearly made contact with it. 147 00:05:57,073 --> 00:05:58,948 My scan says you shit standing up. 148 00:05:58,949 --> 00:06:00,700 Says it gets on your legs. 149 00:06:00,701 --> 00:06:02,077 Where is the rabbit? 150 00:06:02,078 --> 00:06:04,287 Oh, a cross gun. That's dumb. 151 00:06:04,288 --> 00:06:05,747 Nobody needs to get hurt. 152 00:06:05,748 --> 00:06:07,290 I'm sure I'll be fine. 153 00:06:07,291 --> 00:06:08,834 [ Grunting ] Aah! 154 00:06:10,252 --> 00:06:11,252 Aah! 155 00:06:11,253 --> 00:06:20,220 {\an8}♪ 156 00:06:20,221 --> 00:06:21,930 Aren't you guys on Easter's side? 157 00:06:21,931 --> 00:06:23,598 What the hell is happening?! 158 00:06:23,599 --> 00:06:25,016 [ Grunting ] 159 00:06:25,017 --> 00:06:27,019 Oh! Ah! 160 00:06:29,438 --> 00:06:30,730 The egg is damaged. 161 00:06:30,731 --> 00:06:34,275 But now we know where it's from. 162 00:06:34,276 --> 00:06:35,819 Andromeda! 163 00:06:35,820 --> 00:06:38,822 Go there and destroy all the containment eggs except one. 164 00:06:38,823 --> 00:06:40,907 We'll capture the rabbit here. 165 00:06:40,908 --> 00:06:45,121 And then Easter will be finished. 166 00:06:50,626 --> 00:06:51,543 Ahh. 167 00:06:51,544 --> 00:06:52,752 They got the egg. 168 00:06:52,753 --> 00:06:54,129 H-How will we know where to go? 169 00:06:54,130 --> 00:06:55,714 Morty, it's one word. We just said it. 170 00:06:55,715 --> 00:06:56,965 Andromeda. 171 00:06:56,966 --> 00:07:00,136 Alright! To Amadahbra! 172 00:07:00,970 --> 00:07:03,680 Are you... Are you messing with me? 173 00:07:03,681 --> 00:07:06,015 Beth. Please let me out. 174 00:07:06,016 --> 00:07:07,767 Rick put you in there for a reason, sweetie. 175 00:07:07,768 --> 00:07:10,353 Ugh, I feel fine! I need to pee. 176 00:07:10,354 --> 00:07:15,483 I just want... five minutes... to stretch my legs! 177 00:07:15,484 --> 00:07:17,986 Whoa. Heh. Your arms. 178 00:07:17,987 --> 00:07:20,530 I know. They ripped through my shirt! 179 00:07:20,531 --> 00:07:22,949 I'm telling you, I feel amazing. 180 00:07:22,950 --> 00:07:25,535 Like, I feel like I could... 181 00:07:25,536 --> 00:07:28,621 Holy shit. I feel so shallow for how turned on I am. 182 00:07:28,622 --> 00:07:30,457 See? I'm solid. 183 00:07:30,458 --> 00:07:32,834 And so are you. 184 00:07:32,835 --> 00:07:34,294 Oh. [ Giggles ] Have I ever told you 185 00:07:34,295 --> 00:07:36,337 you're the hottest woman I could imagine? 186 00:07:36,338 --> 00:07:38,840 Am I this easy? I think I'm this easy. 187 00:07:38,841 --> 00:07:41,342 I don't tell you enough. I don't see you. 188 00:07:41,343 --> 00:07:42,761 But I see you now. 189 00:07:42,762 --> 00:07:44,262 Or as the Na'vi put it... 190 00:07:44,263 --> 00:07:46,848 {\an8}[ Speaking Na'vi ] 191 00:07:46,849 --> 00:07:48,683 [ Breathing heavily ] 192 00:07:48,684 --> 00:07:50,185 We gotta wash these sheets. 193 00:07:50,186 --> 00:07:52,437 How 'bout one more go before they dry? 194 00:07:52,438 --> 00:07:54,689 [ Both moaning ] 195 00:07:54,690 --> 00:07:56,024 Uch, Jesus! 196 00:07:56,025 --> 00:07:57,358 What? What?! 197 00:07:57,359 --> 00:07:59,486 Jerry, you've got a boil on your back, 198 00:07:59,487 --> 00:08:01,237 and there's hair inside it! 199 00:08:01,238 --> 00:08:02,739 I'm sorry, just-- 200 00:08:02,740 --> 00:08:05,408 I cwath thu fwack you. 201 00:08:05,409 --> 00:08:07,952 Jerry? Your tooth. 202 00:08:07,953 --> 00:08:10,038 Huh. Would you look at that? 203 00:08:10,039 --> 00:08:12,040 Oh, there's another one. Oh! 204 00:08:12,041 --> 00:08:15,084 [ Chuckles ] Oh. Oh. 205 00:08:15,085 --> 00:08:17,295 My mouth feels weird in the middle. 206 00:08:17,296 --> 00:08:18,671 Okay, back in the prism. 207 00:08:18,672 --> 00:08:20,381 No! So-- So what? 208 00:08:20,382 --> 00:08:23,092 A few teeth fell out while we wait for Rick to get back. 209 00:08:23,093 --> 00:08:24,594 Why is that such a big dea-- 210 00:08:24,595 --> 00:08:26,638 [ Screaming ] Jerry! 211 00:08:26,639 --> 00:08:28,932 My legs! Oh, my God, my legs! 212 00:08:28,933 --> 00:08:30,558 They're broken! 213 00:08:30,559 --> 00:08:32,894 Wait, they're-- they're fine! 214 00:08:32,895 --> 00:08:34,229 Better than fine. 215 00:08:34,230 --> 00:08:36,314 Wow! Look at this, babe. Look! 216 00:08:36,315 --> 00:08:37,899 Just calm down. We'll, uh-- 217 00:08:37,900 --> 00:08:39,275 W-We'll get you more lettuce. 218 00:08:39,276 --> 00:08:40,902 Why are you being such a drag about this? 219 00:08:40,903 --> 00:08:43,238 You're scaring me. And you're bumming me out. 220 00:08:43,239 --> 00:08:46,783 If you're gonna be such a prude, I'm getting out of here. 221 00:08:46,784 --> 00:08:49,494 Jerry! Jerry, come back! 222 00:08:49,495 --> 00:08:55,792 {\an8}♪ 223 00:08:55,793 --> 00:08:57,627 {\an8}Rick, are we in the right place? 224 00:08:57,628 --> 00:08:59,045 {\an8}Yeah. 225 00:08:59,046 --> 00:09:00,964 Trying to work out the big mythology here, 226 00:09:00,965 --> 00:09:03,424 and all I'm getting is H.R. Giger meets Coachella. 227 00:09:03,425 --> 00:09:06,761 Okay, Rick, so, it looks like there's a space oyster, 228 00:09:06,762 --> 00:09:09,722 {\an8}and it hypnotizes animals with its pearl-- Uh, no. Stop. Stop. 229 00:09:09,723 --> 00:09:11,266 I was just makin' a hypothesis! 230 00:09:11,267 --> 00:09:12,934 You know, trying out some science? 231 00:09:12,935 --> 00:09:14,269 Here's science. 232 00:09:14,270 --> 00:09:15,770 The Easter Rabbit's an alien. 233 00:09:15,771 --> 00:09:17,063 They send it to planets in an egg. 234 00:09:17,064 --> 00:09:18,231 If you kill it, you become it. 235 00:09:18,232 --> 00:09:20,233 Okay, well, explain this, then. 236 00:09:20,234 --> 00:09:21,901 Easy. 237 00:09:21,902 --> 00:09:24,237 The rabbit is some kind of pheromonal catalyst. 238 00:09:24,238 --> 00:09:26,030 L-Looks like it makes everyone have sex 239 00:09:26,031 --> 00:09:28,283 until the planet gets overpopulated and collapses. 240 00:09:28,284 --> 00:09:30,910 It's fuck-based terraforming! 241 00:09:30,911 --> 00:09:32,787 Shit, duck! 242 00:09:32,788 --> 00:09:34,998 Whoa, Rick, d-do you see that? 243 00:09:34,999 --> 00:09:38,042 Yeah. It has a butt where its dick should be. 244 00:09:38,043 --> 00:09:39,085 Rick. Morty. 245 00:09:39,086 --> 00:09:42,213 Its butt is in the front. 246 00:09:42,214 --> 00:09:43,965 Ooooh, these must be the guys 247 00:09:43,966 --> 00:09:46,217 who move in after the rabbit's done its stuff. 248 00:09:46,218 --> 00:09:48,011 Have you seen any of them turn around yet? 249 00:09:48,012 --> 00:09:50,139 Is it in the back? Stop it. 250 00:09:52,391 --> 00:09:54,642 [ Screeching ] 251 00:09:54,643 --> 00:10:02,692 {\an8}♪ 252 00:10:02,693 --> 00:10:04,068 [ Cage clatters ] 253 00:10:04,069 --> 00:10:06,362 Prepare to meet your maker! Huh? 254 00:10:06,363 --> 00:10:08,616 [ Screeching ] 255 00:10:10,951 --> 00:10:12,827 Christ guys hate the bald guys? 256 00:10:12,828 --> 00:10:14,913 What is the lore? Who do we help? 257 00:10:14,914 --> 00:10:18,082 [ Screeching ] 258 00:10:18,083 --> 00:10:20,209 Neither! We're gonna third party! 259 00:10:20,210 --> 00:10:22,837 [ Panting ] He's going for the last egg! 260 00:10:22,838 --> 00:10:24,297 Stop the dentist! 261 00:10:24,298 --> 00:10:25,715 Aah! 262 00:10:25,716 --> 00:10:27,051 Shit! 263 00:10:28,469 --> 00:10:30,012 Aah! 264 00:10:30,888 --> 00:10:32,430 [ Screeching ] 265 00:10:32,431 --> 00:10:38,353 {\an8}♪ 266 00:10:38,354 --> 00:10:40,521 H-How are we getting off this planet, Rick? 267 00:10:40,522 --> 00:10:41,898 Same way they do. 268 00:10:41,899 --> 00:10:43,441 Son of a bitch. 269 00:10:43,442 --> 00:10:44,359 Those are ships? 270 00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:46,861 {\an8}Oh, I've seen this on TV. 271 00:10:46,862 --> 00:10:48,529 {\an8}Th-They're on Earth! {\an8}Yep. 272 00:10:48,530 --> 00:10:50,114 On Easter Island. 273 00:10:50,115 --> 00:10:52,368 Suppose that might've been a good place to start. 274 00:10:58,248 --> 00:11:00,750 Sir... mission successful. 275 00:11:00,751 --> 00:11:02,418 We didn't get an egg. 276 00:11:02,419 --> 00:11:05,004 The old man and his young son escaped with it. 277 00:11:05,005 --> 00:11:08,716 Kincaid: Why did you say mission successful, then? 278 00:11:08,717 --> 00:11:10,551 I dunno. I'm dying. 279 00:11:10,552 --> 00:11:12,720 Kinda wanted to go out on a high-- 280 00:11:12,721 --> 00:11:14,639 He was here. 281 00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:17,643 Now... where did he go? 282 00:11:19,561 --> 00:11:22,730 [ Up-tempo country music plays ] 283 00:11:22,731 --> 00:11:31,072 {\an8}♪ 284 00:11:31,073 --> 00:11:33,241 [ Cheers and applause ] 285 00:11:33,242 --> 00:11:35,576 Can't believe you're here after that motorcycle accident 286 00:11:35,577 --> 00:11:37,745 you clearly just walked away from. 287 00:11:37,746 --> 00:11:39,580 Yeah, buddy. I respect you. 288 00:11:39,581 --> 00:11:42,626 You respect me enough to have sex with that guy? 289 00:11:45,129 --> 00:11:46,714 What? No! 290 00:11:48,215 --> 00:11:50,676 But maybe I could give him a little smooch. 291 00:11:51,802 --> 00:11:53,261 Whoa, what's going on? 292 00:11:53,262 --> 00:11:55,471 Have sex with someone! 293 00:11:55,472 --> 00:11:57,640 How 'bout a dry hump instead? 294 00:11:57,641 --> 00:11:58,808 Good enough. 295 00:11:58,809 --> 00:12:00,101 Oh, yeah. 296 00:12:00,102 --> 00:12:01,729 Powers growing. 297 00:12:03,272 --> 00:12:05,898 Societal collapse imminent! 298 00:12:05,899 --> 00:12:07,734 [ Banging, clattering ] 299 00:12:07,735 --> 00:12:10,611 [ Laughter ] 300 00:12:10,612 --> 00:12:11,946 [ Zipper opens ] 301 00:12:11,947 --> 00:12:14,282 Oh, yeah. Oh. 302 00:12:14,283 --> 00:12:16,409 Freeze, abomination! 303 00:12:16,410 --> 00:12:17,994 No! No! 304 00:12:17,995 --> 00:12:20,955 Must collapse society! 305 00:12:20,956 --> 00:12:23,124 Not today, cupcake. 306 00:12:23,125 --> 00:12:33,801 {\an8}♪ 307 00:12:33,802 --> 00:12:35,470 Aaah! Rick! 308 00:12:35,471 --> 00:12:40,308 {\an8}♪ 309 00:12:40,309 --> 00:12:42,727 I feel like we got off on the wrong foot here. 310 00:12:42,728 --> 00:12:45,730 Christrooper General Reinhard Kincaid. 311 00:12:45,731 --> 00:12:48,441 The truth is, we both want the same thing. 312 00:12:48,442 --> 00:12:49,984 We both want you to shut up? 313 00:12:49,985 --> 00:12:52,862 Cute. Let me tell you a story. 314 00:12:52,863 --> 00:12:57,033 My species does not like sex. 315 00:12:57,034 --> 00:12:59,160 Is that... the whole story? 316 00:12:59,161 --> 00:13:00,578 We think it's gross. 317 00:13:00,579 --> 00:13:02,497 I don't like seeing it in movies or TV. 318 00:13:02,498 --> 00:13:04,832 It upsets me when they reference it in pop songs. 319 00:13:04,833 --> 00:13:06,501 Wow. 2,000 years ago, 320 00:13:06,502 --> 00:13:09,337 we sent a Trooper here to kill your rabbit. 321 00:13:09,338 --> 00:13:11,380 But Earth crucified him. 322 00:13:11,381 --> 00:13:14,092 Whoa. That is not how we tell that story. 323 00:13:14,093 --> 00:13:15,802 Look, you have the egg. 324 00:13:15,803 --> 00:13:17,053 We have... 325 00:13:17,054 --> 00:13:18,721 [ Grunting ] 326 00:13:18,722 --> 00:13:19,931 Dad?! Shut up. 327 00:13:19,932 --> 00:13:22,558 Mo-o-o-rty! 328 00:13:22,559 --> 00:13:24,352 [ Growls ] 329 00:13:24,353 --> 00:13:26,270 He's gonna break through! 330 00:13:26,271 --> 00:13:29,441 [ Growling ] 331 00:13:32,236 --> 00:13:34,279 [ Screeching ] 332 00:13:36,198 --> 00:13:37,698 Holy shit. 333 00:13:37,699 --> 00:13:43,412 {\an8}♪ 334 00:13:43,413 --> 00:13:45,039 Jerry. You in there? 335 00:13:45,040 --> 00:13:47,834 Come on, let's get you home and un-Easter-Clause you. 336 00:13:47,835 --> 00:13:50,253 There is no Jerry. 337 00:13:50,254 --> 00:13:53,381 Only Bunny. Kiss. 338 00:13:53,382 --> 00:13:55,299 Gross, dude. Dad! We saw the murals. 339 00:13:55,300 --> 00:13:56,717 You don't think the first thing we would do 340 00:13:56,718 --> 00:13:57,844 is inoculate ourselves? 341 00:13:57,845 --> 00:13:59,053 Yeah, this is a low. 342 00:13:59,054 --> 00:14:02,598 Sex! 343 00:14:02,599 --> 00:14:07,979 {\an8}♪ 344 00:14:07,980 --> 00:14:09,898 Have baby. 345 00:14:10,858 --> 00:14:13,067 Cram penis. 346 00:14:13,068 --> 00:14:16,112 Spill juice. 347 00:14:16,113 --> 00:14:19,783 Time to make fuuuuck! 348 00:14:21,660 --> 00:14:24,662 [ People moaning ] 349 00:14:24,663 --> 00:14:26,122 Aah! Beth! 350 00:14:26,123 --> 00:14:27,582 [ Breathing heavily ] 351 00:14:27,583 --> 00:14:28,666 Aah! 352 00:14:28,667 --> 00:14:30,627 [ Growling ] 353 00:14:31,378 --> 00:14:32,920 [ Jerry breathing heavily ] 354 00:14:32,921 --> 00:14:35,256 J-Jerry? 355 00:14:35,257 --> 00:14:37,550 Aah! 356 00:14:37,551 --> 00:14:42,055 Jerry! I want to have sex with you, not this. 357 00:14:43,599 --> 00:14:45,933 Jerry monster? 358 00:14:45,934 --> 00:14:47,643 No! 359 00:14:47,644 --> 00:14:49,645 So sorry. 360 00:14:49,646 --> 00:14:52,607 I'm sorry, Beth. 361 00:14:52,608 --> 00:14:54,775 What have I become? 362 00:14:54,776 --> 00:14:56,360 It's okay. 363 00:14:56,361 --> 00:14:59,238 You just wanted to celebrate a holiday with your family. 364 00:14:59,239 --> 00:15:01,240 Now you know never to do that again. 365 00:15:01,241 --> 00:15:03,951 Get back! Can't control it! 366 00:15:03,952 --> 00:15:05,369 I know what to do. 367 00:15:05,370 --> 00:15:11,459 {\an8}♪ 368 00:15:11,460 --> 00:15:13,753 [ Grunting ] 369 00:15:13,754 --> 00:15:20,760 {\an8}♪ 370 00:15:20,761 --> 00:15:23,804 Anyway, that's the whole plot of "Alien: Prometheus." 371 00:15:23,805 --> 00:15:25,681 Wow! Sounds memorable! 372 00:15:25,682 --> 00:15:27,683 H-How'd we even start talking about that? 373 00:15:27,684 --> 00:15:29,810 I dunno, Morty. Sometimes I just get on tangents. 374 00:15:29,811 --> 00:15:31,938 [ Laughing ] 375 00:15:31,939 --> 00:15:33,689 You think you've won. 376 00:15:33,690 --> 00:15:37,318 But we sent our best man, and he couldn't do the job. 377 00:15:37,319 --> 00:15:40,196 Do you truly think you're better than the Christ? 378 00:15:40,197 --> 00:15:42,198 Ugh. This guy doesn't even die when he's dead. 379 00:15:42,199 --> 00:15:45,493 Your planet will be, how do you say it, 380 00:15:45,494 --> 00:15:47,161 fucked out. 381 00:15:47,162 --> 00:15:50,539 [ Laughing ] 382 00:15:50,540 --> 00:15:51,582 Ho. 383 00:15:51,583 --> 00:15:54,085 [ Wheezes ] 384 00:15:54,086 --> 00:15:56,170 Okay, now he's dead. 385 00:15:56,171 --> 00:15:58,631 [ Snoring ] 386 00:15:58,632 --> 00:15:59,674 He's sleeping. 387 00:15:59,675 --> 00:16:01,509 Do we... need to kill him? 388 00:16:01,510 --> 00:16:04,262 We can go. He's on an island without legs. 389 00:16:04,263 --> 00:16:06,098 [ Both moaning ] 390 00:16:07,891 --> 00:16:10,559 Morty, remind me to delete the Ring cams after this. 391 00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:12,103 It's like that thing you told me about, 392 00:16:12,104 --> 00:16:14,272 the-- the rat thing. Rat thing? 393 00:16:14,273 --> 00:16:16,357 You told me once about an experiment with rats. 394 00:16:16,358 --> 00:16:18,818 When I was, "wasting time brushing my hair." 395 00:16:18,819 --> 00:16:21,529 Rat utopia! Morty! I-It's exactly like that. 396 00:16:21,530 --> 00:16:23,281 That's-- You did science! 397 00:16:23,282 --> 00:16:24,699 Good job. Nice little mini-arc. 398 00:16:24,700 --> 00:16:29,203 And all it took was a trip to Amadahbra! 399 00:16:29,204 --> 00:16:30,496 He's in the garage. 400 00:16:30,497 --> 00:16:32,206 And unless you guys just jerked around 401 00:16:32,207 --> 00:16:34,125 for the last 48 hours, you know how to fix this. 402 00:16:34,126 --> 00:16:35,293 He's my grandson! We didn't jerk anything! 403 00:16:35,294 --> 00:16:36,711 I made a vaccine. 404 00:16:36,712 --> 00:16:40,673 Can't... hold it... in! 405 00:16:40,674 --> 00:16:42,801 [ People moaning ] 406 00:16:46,138 --> 00:16:47,346 [ Breathing heavily ] 407 00:16:47,347 --> 00:16:49,515 Thank god we already had sex. 408 00:16:49,516 --> 00:16:51,475 When he was a person. 409 00:16:51,476 --> 00:16:53,477 Alright, I'm gonna extract the rabbit particles into this egg 410 00:16:53,478 --> 00:16:55,187 without killing Jerry. 411 00:16:55,188 --> 00:16:57,523 Do not touch the beam or you'll become the bunny. 412 00:16:57,524 --> 00:16:59,567 And I'm guessing it'll be fast, because it's... 413 00:16:59,568 --> 00:17:01,819 Easter. 414 00:17:01,820 --> 00:17:04,155 [ Growling ] 415 00:17:04,156 --> 00:17:05,823 Ugh, what now?! 416 00:17:05,824 --> 00:17:08,242 [ Groaning ] 417 00:17:08,243 --> 00:17:10,202 Ooh! It's a-- It's a butt guy! 418 00:17:10,203 --> 00:17:11,996 Morty, I saw his back part! He's got a-- 419 00:17:11,997 --> 00:17:13,497 Rick, there's no time! 420 00:17:13,498 --> 00:17:15,500 Aah! 421 00:17:16,084 --> 00:17:17,336 [ Screeching ] 422 00:17:18,962 --> 00:17:19,962 Shit! 423 00:17:19,963 --> 00:17:21,172 [ Crackling ] 424 00:17:21,173 --> 00:17:24,050 Guuuuaaaaaaaahhhhhh! 425 00:17:24,051 --> 00:17:25,677 [ Screams ] 426 00:17:27,095 --> 00:17:29,555 Oh, no! No, no, no, no, no! 427 00:17:29,556 --> 00:17:30,556 Mom! 428 00:17:30,557 --> 00:17:32,099 [ Growling ] 429 00:17:32,100 --> 00:17:34,018 Aah! 430 00:17:34,019 --> 00:17:35,896 [ Groaning ] 431 00:17:37,147 --> 00:17:39,649 Agh! God, I hate Easter! 432 00:17:42,110 --> 00:17:44,695 Aaah! 433 00:17:44,696 --> 00:17:46,364 Beth, are you okay?! 434 00:17:46,365 --> 00:17:48,700 Jerry. I'm so sorry! 435 00:17:49,785 --> 00:17:51,535 [ Roars ] 436 00:17:51,536 --> 00:17:54,663 [ Sighs ] [ People moaning ] 437 00:17:54,664 --> 00:17:56,999 I have to fix this. 438 00:17:57,000 --> 00:18:00,711 Aah! Aah! 439 00:18:00,712 --> 00:18:02,506 [ Screeching ] 440 00:18:03,382 --> 00:18:05,174 Oh, fuck! Fuck! 441 00:18:05,175 --> 00:18:07,635 It's in the Butt Guy! 442 00:18:07,636 --> 00:18:10,347 [ Screeching ] 443 00:18:16,311 --> 00:18:18,396 Whoa! It's that guy! 444 00:18:18,397 --> 00:18:19,647 How did you get here? 445 00:18:19,648 --> 00:18:21,649 I took the big stone ship. 446 00:18:21,650 --> 00:18:24,360 But I landed downtown, so then I took a bus. 447 00:18:24,361 --> 00:18:25,820 Then I put the egg back in the splitter 448 00:18:25,821 --> 00:18:27,530 after he dropped it in front of me 449 00:18:27,531 --> 00:18:29,490 and patched the egg with a piece from that mosaic. 450 00:18:29,491 --> 00:18:32,159 Then I used that to get the bunny out of the butt guy 451 00:18:32,160 --> 00:18:33,744 into the egg, which you guys saw, 452 00:18:33,745 --> 00:18:37,164 and now we're in the present. 453 00:18:37,165 --> 00:18:39,500 Everyone stopped having sex. 454 00:18:39,501 --> 00:18:41,168 It's-- It's beautiful. 455 00:18:41,169 --> 00:18:42,670 You can keep the egg. We're done here. 456 00:18:42,671 --> 00:18:44,255 What am I gonna do with this? 457 00:18:44,256 --> 00:18:45,923 I dunno. Use it as art? 458 00:18:45,924 --> 00:18:48,175 What do people do on your planet if they're not having sex? 459 00:18:48,176 --> 00:18:49,510 I'm so glad you asked. 460 00:18:49,511 --> 00:18:50,845 We weren't actually asking. 461 00:18:50,846 --> 00:18:52,096 Get off our lawn. 462 00:18:52,097 --> 00:18:54,098 [ Grunting ] 463 00:18:54,099 --> 00:18:56,809 [ Chuckles ] Alright, I can do it. 464 00:18:56,810 --> 00:18:58,727 [ Grunts ] Just give me a moment. 465 00:18:58,728 --> 00:19:01,439 [ Grunting ] Turn away. Turn away. Who-- 466 00:19:01,440 --> 00:19:03,816 Who was that? Honestly, Mom, don't ask. 467 00:19:03,817 --> 00:19:05,985 The less we know about holidays the better. 468 00:19:05,986 --> 00:19:08,571 Well said, son. Well said. 469 00:19:08,572 --> 00:19:11,282 ♪ Deck the house with Easter baskets ♪ 470 00:19:11,283 --> 00:19:14,368 ♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la, eggs ♪ 471 00:19:14,369 --> 00:19:17,037 ♪ Plastic grass and chocolate rabbits ♪ 472 00:19:17,038 --> 00:19:19,874 ♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, marshmallow bird ♪ 473 00:19:19,875 --> 00:19:22,918 ♪ Easter is the time for giving ♪ 474 00:19:22,919 --> 00:19:25,713 ♪ Fa-la-la-la-la-la, Easter milk ♪ 475 00:19:25,714 --> 00:19:28,757 ♪ Something, something, basket, candy ♪ 476 00:19:28,758 --> 00:19:31,302 ♪ Jerry makes an egg, and it is nice ♪ 477 00:19:31,303 --> 00:19:34,555 ♪ Oh, presidents can have a birthday ♪ 478 00:19:34,556 --> 00:19:37,433 ♪ Fa-la-la-la-la-la, celebrate ♪ 479 00:19:37,434 --> 00:19:40,478 ♪ Burger King and do it your way ♪ 480 00:19:40,479 --> 00:19:43,314 ♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, Whopper, Big Mac ♪ 481 00:19:43,315 --> 00:19:46,108 ♪ Some are loud and some are somber ♪ 482 00:19:46,109 --> 00:19:48,736 ♪ Fa-la-la-la-la-la, different things ♪ 483 00:19:48,737 --> 00:19:51,989 ♪ Corvettes and Hondas, Mr. Golf Cart ♪ 484 00:19:51,990 --> 00:19:54,742 ♪ Everything's a sale, go to the store ♪ 485 00:19:54,743 --> 00:19:56,577 ♪ Fa-la-la-la-la-la, spend ♪ 486 00:19:56,578 --> 00:19:58,287 That should do it. 487 00:19:58,288 --> 00:20:01,750 I-I'm happy we did all the other religious holidays off-screen. 488 00:20:03,668 --> 00:20:06,295 Wait, did we just live through a whole calendar year? 489 00:20:06,296 --> 00:20:08,172 Is Summer still at spring break?! 490 00:20:08,173 --> 00:20:10,132 [ Dance music plays ] 491 00:20:10,133 --> 00:20:11,759 You wanna do more poppers? 492 00:20:11,760 --> 00:20:13,302 No, I'm tired. 493 00:20:13,303 --> 00:20:14,970 How long have we been here? 494 00:20:14,971 --> 00:20:16,931 I think it's December. 495 00:20:16,932 --> 00:20:18,474 Spring break! 496 00:20:18,475 --> 00:20:20,809 Sunblock, trading sunblock for flip-flops! 497 00:20:20,810 --> 00:20:23,270 We've got shots. Tequila shots, Vodka shots. 498 00:20:23,271 --> 00:20:24,271 Tetanus shots! 499 00:20:24,272 --> 00:20:25,731 [ Air horn blows ] 500 00:20:25,732 --> 00:20:27,942 Shit. Gotta go see Madison. 501 00:20:27,943 --> 00:20:29,527 Do you have a tribute? 502 00:20:29,528 --> 00:20:32,279 Madison! I've brought you this epic gram of mushrooms. 503 00:20:32,280 --> 00:20:34,240 "Epic"? What are you, 30? 504 00:20:34,241 --> 00:20:35,574 Get the hell out of my tent. No! 505 00:20:35,575 --> 00:20:36,909 What did you bring her? 506 00:20:36,910 --> 00:20:38,577 Weed gummies, and I found a PopSocket. 507 00:20:38,578 --> 00:20:40,287 Hey! Madison! I brought you a PopSocket! 508 00:20:40,288 --> 00:20:41,789 That's mine! Give it back! 509 00:20:41,790 --> 00:20:42,957 Ugh, drama. 510 00:20:42,958 --> 00:20:46,293 Exile them to the Best Western pool area. 511 00:20:46,294 --> 00:20:47,545 Hold up. 512 00:20:47,546 --> 00:20:49,129 What's the story on that bracelet? 513 00:20:49,130 --> 00:20:52,299 [ Sighs ] After I realized spring break only ends 514 00:20:52,300 --> 00:20:53,801 if your parents pick you up, 515 00:20:53,802 --> 00:20:55,970 I holed up with another forgotten girl I met. 516 00:20:55,971 --> 00:20:59,473 Me and Brittany lived on jello shots until her teeth fell out. 517 00:20:59,474 --> 00:21:02,309 She didn't have a second stomach just for alcohol. 518 00:21:02,310 --> 00:21:03,644 She didn't make it. 519 00:21:03,645 --> 00:21:06,272 I wear her teeth to remember. 520 00:21:06,273 --> 00:21:07,856 They're yours if you want 'em. 521 00:21:07,857 --> 00:21:10,526 Tight. This girl is my new bestie. 522 00:21:10,527 --> 00:21:13,404 Hell yeah. Let's do poppers! 523 00:21:13,405 --> 00:21:15,823 Hell... yeah. 524 00:21:15,824 --> 00:21:45,812 {\an8}♪ 525 00:21:49,232 --> 00:21:51,025 [ Doorbell rings ] 526 00:21:51,026 --> 00:21:54,737 Debra. My love. I voyaged across the stars. 527 00:21:54,738 --> 00:21:58,073 And I've realized one thing above all others. 528 00:21:58,074 --> 00:22:01,118 I want to make love to my wife. 529 00:22:01,119 --> 00:22:03,203 What? Sex is gross. 530 00:22:03,204 --> 00:22:04,538 Are you sure? 531 00:22:04,539 --> 00:22:06,040 It doesn't weird me out anymore. 532 00:22:06,041 --> 00:22:07,833 I sort of got to see it up close. 533 00:22:07,834 --> 00:22:11,045 You've been gone for 20 years. You came back in half. 534 00:22:11,046 --> 00:22:12,379 What am I gonna fuck, 535 00:22:12,380 --> 00:22:13,839 that bone that's sticking out of your body? 536 00:22:13,840 --> 00:22:15,924 Also, what is that? I didn't ask for a big egg. 537 00:22:15,925 --> 00:22:19,678 It's got an immortal bunny spirit in it. 538 00:22:19,679 --> 00:22:21,764 Does that turn you on? No. Absolutely not. 539 00:22:21,765 --> 00:22:24,643 Drag yourself somewhere else. 540 00:22:25,852 --> 00:22:29,731 I have lived my life poorly. 541 00:22:31,149 --> 00:22:32,776 Did you get any of that? 37596

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