Original subtitles

Mayor? She's appointed a mayor?

An interim acting mayor.

Just until Mayor Bay is back from maternity leave.

Due to certain volatile issues before the council right now, the mayor felt

an unbiased outsider would be the best choice to lead the city.

Wow. I can't believe it.

Me. The mayor.

Kenny, you should feel this chair. It is so comfortable. It kind of molds to

your butt.

It's amazing.

Oh, would you take a picture for me?

Sure, why not?

It's for my parents.

Smile.

Thanks.

I could grow to like this.

Well, don't get too comfortable, Max.

Remember, it's only for eight weeks.

I don't want this to come out wrong or anything, but, Kenny, as long as I'm in

office, you probably should call me mayor.

Would somebody please tell me what the hell is going on in Rome?

I mean, what is it with this freaking place?

Have you heard about this mayor thing?

I mean, come on.

Initially, they had this deaf -mute bitch on wheels calling the shots, and

they've got Barbarella. I mean, this sheriff's bimbo running the show down

there. Oh, man.

I mean, honestly, I mean, I've seen Maxine Stewart, okay? And quite frankly,

wouldn't have to ask me twice to do her. I could make her squeal like a pig.

But does that mean I want her making executive decisions on my behalf? I

think so.

I mean, what happens when she's on her period?

Oh, shut up. I'm having cramps, you bastards.

Oh, man.

I'd much rather take a homo any day of the week over that kind of hell. And I

hope you hear me, Mayor.

Turn that crap off. That's Max he's talking about.

What can I say, Jimmy? The guy's funny sometimes.

And he makes a point.

There's a reason why women aren't allowed in combat, Sheriff.

Look, the guy is a hate monger. I don't want to hear him in this station again.

And by the way, this department is damn lucky to have Max as mayor right now,

especially with this new budget up for approval. We can use her support.

I don't get it. Why did she pick Max?

It's this female bonding thing.

Women get together, talk about the enemy, us.

Next thing you know, they're appointing each other mayor.

Face it, pal.

We're gelded.

Maybe it's postpartum psychosis caused by some kind of hormone imbalance.

Carter. Well, why else would she choose Max?

Lori knew I ran for mayor. I'm clearly the better qualified candidate.

I'm for slow growth, better schools, mandatory autopsies. Don't prejudge,

Carter. Max could do a perfectly fine job.

Are you out of your mind?

You let that multimart in, you're going to wipe out the entire downtown shopping

area.

I speak for the entire community when I say you go ahead with this. There's

going to be big trouble.

First off, Mr. Markoff, I did not say that I was in favor of anything.

I am just trying to be fair.

The multi -mark people have a position just like you do.

Excuse me, girl. Who says you speak for the entire community?

Pearl speaks for all of us. Stop the multi -mark. Don't stab us in the back.

You're five minutes around.

Next, Mr. James Hallett.

Jim Hallett, Corporate Vice President of Communications for Multimart.

Let me dispel some of the fear, folks.

First of all, Multimart has no intention of wiping out your local businesses.

We don't sell quaint antiques or Aunt Sally's fudge. We could never compete

that.

We like to think that our presence in the community has a synergistic effect,

bringing more commerce to all businesses, not to mention 300 permanent

positions. There really isn't a downside, just an opportunity.

Fine. Go ahead and just wipe out our local history.

The proposed site of this so -called...

mega monstrosity is exactly where the Glatfeld family built the town's first

homestead.

That's our past we're destroying, folks.

As president of the Rome Historical Society, I have to raise my strongest

objection.

I think we need to hear more about this. And how about an environmental impact

report? A parking lot with a thousand spaces means a thousand cars. I don't

the sound of that. Why not?

Well, what I mean is, have you ever tried to buy sneakers or a toaster

here?

And what about those of us who work?

And can't shop until after six. You know, it might not be such a bad idea to

have a place that's open late and carries... Shop on Saturday.

This is a small town.

There's nothing wrong with a little healthy competition, Burl.

And Main Street is looking a little run down lately.

Mayor Stewart.

Mr. Wambaugh.

Special counsel to the mayor.

I'd like to remind you that your temporarily indisposed predecessor was

decidedly slow growth in her approach to this issue. I am aware of that, Mr.

Lomba. Yes, but Mayor Stewart, under these circumstances, it would behoove

to... But as acting mayor, I will make my own decision on this issue.

Thank you for your input.

You can't change policy, Max.

Laurie Bay appointed me. No strings attached.

I have full authority.

And while we're on the subject, you're fired.

What? You questioned me in front of the entire council.

Frankly, Doug, I don't think you believe in me.

So, you're out.

Fat. What?

If you skim the fat off the sheriff's department budget, you'd have enough

grease to open your own burger joints. What are you talking about? This

lean as it gets, Maxine.

You forget who you're talking to. I know where the skeletons are buried, and

most of them are right here, between lines 7 and 23.

$35 ,000 for clerical support.

What clerical support?

Otis Prager and Charlene Gibbon only work half days. Max, we need a full

You know that.

No, you don't. Everyone can type their own reports.

I don't believe this.

Since when do you have such strong opinions about our budget? I don't

this coming up before I Have to look at things differently now Jimmy.

I'm the mayor Now if you want me to take your budget seriously, you're going to

have to rework those numbers women

are sex objects. Chuck, please. Come on, Doc. You're a doctor. You know it's

biological. If women weren't sex objects, why would men even want to hang

with them for crying out loud? I'll bet you most men would rather hang around

with me than their wives because I've got a better personality.

Let me ask you a question. No, you know what? This is my show and I get to ask

the questions, Chuck. No, really. Let me ask you a question. You have an active

sex life, right?

Chuck, we're here to talk about your quick -release problem. Isn't that the

reason you're on this show? Don't get real. The only reason I'm on your show

to boost your flagging ratings. We'll get around to my hair trigger in a

while. By the way, what's your cup size?

You know, this thing just sort of deteriorates. I'd say about a B. Well,

know what? You can say whatever you want. I won't dignify that with a

A bee cup is nothing to be ashamed of, sweetheart. I mean, it's perfect.

More than a mouthful is always a waste. But I'll tell you something else. This

new mayor of yours, now she is sporting quite a set of sweater puppies. I'll bet

you they're still being milk fed. What's her deal? Is she got like a girlfriend?

A lot of men call me with concerns about premature ejaculation.

Let's talk about how you deal with that problem. I'm telling you, she is one hot

fox, but I don't trust her. You know why?

She's like a human Barbie doll. If she took off her shoes, I'll bet you she

couldn't stand up by herself. You know what I say? I say impeach the bimbo.

Impeach the bimbo, people. Come on, impeach the bimbo.

Oh, hello. Is that real?

What? Your hair. Oh, man, it's a major turn -on. I just want to grab it and

you around the room right now. Okay, Chuck Bractax. What are we talking

five seconds and out?

All right, all right, I admit it. You know, I'm quick on the draw, but I've

a huge magazine, carries a lot of rounds, and it doesn't take me but a

reload.

You know, I really think I'm good at this.

Max, you've only been in office, what, a day and a half? I know, I know, but I

really do think that I have an aptitude for it. I just never had the guts to put

myself out there before.

You should really be careful, you know?

There's so many issues out there in front of us right now. I mean, there's

parkland zoning, low growth, teen curfew, and now my opinion count.

Well, maybe you should lay back, check things out, before you jump in with both

feet. I always thought that I wanted Jimmy's job.

Now... I think maybe politics is my destiny.

When my term is up, I might consider running for higher office.

Like state senator or something. What do you think?

I think you're pissing people off.

Okay, Kenny. I hear what you're saying.

But I do think it's just typical male insecurity.

Some men have a problem with women in positions of power.

But you know what?

That's too damn bad.

I'm not running in a popularity contest.

A leader doesn't follow. A leader leads.

Max, the word is that Laurie appointed you mayor because she didn't think you'd

do anything except change your wardrobe.

That's not true.

I spoke to Laurie this morning, and I have her full support.

Maybe it just took another woman to recognize my potential.

I've got a meeting. I'm going to...

Put this on my tab.

Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk. I'm a woman, man.

No need to talk.

You drive me crazy just looking at you. Come to me. Come to me. Oh, God.

I've got to go. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I am going to make you moan. No, I think

you're going to make me laugh.

Let's see.

Welcome to the Inferno,

Ignacio. By the way, what kind of name is that?

What do you mean? What I mean, Ignacio, is that it isn't American, is it?

Listen, Chuck, I am American.

Oh, yeah, right. Like there were a lot of pilgrims named Ignacio on the

Mayflower. Give me a break. Where are you from?

Okay, look, Chuck, I didn't call you to tell you where I'm from.

I just think you're being a little hard on the mayor. Why? Because I put her at

the top of my list of women who piss me off?

Hey, as far as I'm concerned, she's the female Newt Gingrich. She knows nothing

about city politics, and yet instead of keeping her mouth shut and just

twiddling her thumbs until Helen Keller gets back, she's become what? A

demagogue with a hair fetish. I mean, how many times can a woman change her

color in a week? What's a demagogue?

And all of a sudden, this bimbo has an opinion on everything.

Multi -mart? Is that why we live in small -town Wisconsin?

To watch the pizzification of America happen in our own backyards? Why is she

picking on the little guys? I like those crappy old shops downtown. You know

what I hope? I hope something bad happens to her, like cancer or AIDS, or

yet, someone should just put her out of her head. Who said that you could listen

to that?

It's just the radio, Mom.

That man, that Chuck Dante, he's a racist, misogynist pig.

He's funny, Mom.

Funny's no excuse.

He's kidding.

I mean, everyone listens to Chuck just to see Alfaro go. That's all.

What's the big deal? The big deal is you're my sons. I expect more from you.

Censorship. Alive and well in the 90s.

33 -year -old male with enlarged mammary glands.

Palpations reveal no masses.

Do you think deep down all guys secretly hate their mothers?

Oh, there's no secret about it.

I walked in this morning to find my own sons listening to Chuck Dante.

I give up!

Jill, don't be too hard on him.

I actually think he's kind of funny. Oh, come on. How can you laugh at somebody

who so obviously hates women? Not to mention anyone else who isn't a white,

moronic male.

Jill, Dante's schtick is just that. It's an act.

He doesn't actually believe that stuff. It's just his way of getting ratings.

This morning he was railing at Max, and it got very ugly, and my sons are

sitting there laughing. You've got to admit, sometimes Dante is very clever.

Besides, I'll bet it's very cathartic for the idiots who actually, like, buy

that stuff.

Why are you defending him? He's a monster.

He talked about your breasts on your own show, for God's sake. Just forget it.

We obviously have a difference of opinion on this.

I can deal with him. You can't.

Fine.

I slept with him.

You're kidding.

Joanna, I don't know what to say.

I didn't think even you could... Jill, he is not as bad as you... Don't start.

This man is dangerous. I won't let my own sons listen to him. I can't believe

that you would let him touch you.

That's sick, Joanna.

Okay, it's sick. It's sick, okay? It's a sick animal thing.

I admit it. What can I say? I am just inexplicably, incredibly attracted to

I don't know. Maybe it's because he is so vile. Maybe it's some weird self

-esteem thing. I don't know. All I know is that I cannot help myself.

I just really respond to him.

And the sex is great.

All right, maybe it's not.

Great, but it's interesting.

Yay.

Mr. Watkins?

Nay.

And finally, Mr. Hayden?

Nay.

Okay.

That's five yays and five nays. I guess that leaves me with the deciding vote.

I've given this matter a lot of thought.

And for me, it comes down to one thing.

Do we want to be a sleepy backwater with just a few dusty old stores?

I mean, I've patrolled Main Street, folks, and no one's shopping there.

Do we want to move into the 21st century?

I think we do.

I vote yay.

Maybe you better go out the back way.

No, I'll go out the front.

This

is

quite a community.

You can't get away with this, you hear me?

I've been here because of this, you stupid bitch.

Who appointed you guys?

The bimbo demagogue strikes again. Come on, people. I warned you. I warned you.

Didn't I tell you that Maxine Stewart was a Mussolini in the making?

Now look what she's done to Rome.

Oh, man.

One multi -mart and she's opened up the floodgates to every strip mall and pizza

joint that wants to make a buck.

I mean, who does this woman think she is anyway?

I mean, doesn't she realize that she's actually ruining lives with this thing?

Oh, man.

Arnie, you still there?

I'm here, Chuck.

All right, so now you're a small business owner in Rome.

For the moment. Is this thing going to completely screw you or what?

I'm dead meat.

We all are. I got a mortgage, man, kids to feed. This stuck -up bitch, she has

no idea what it's like to live in the real world.

All right, I got one more question for you, Arnie. What do you think of women

holding political office?

They suck.

I say we... Impeach the bimbo. Elect Chuck.

Impeach the bimbo. Elect Chuck. Everybody, repeat after me. Next call.

Have I made a mistake?

I mean, I really studied this Multimar issue.

No, sometimes you have to take a lot of flack to do what you think is right.

So typical.

When a man's decisive, he's strong. When a woman's decisive, she's a bitch.

Sometimes she's just a bitch.

As far as anyone?

You think I'm a bitch? Don't listen to her, Max.

You're beautiful, you're smart, you're in charge.

What could be more threatening?

Why do all these men hate Hillary Clinton? And why are they more

Marcia Clark's hairstyle than in her trial work?

Face it, these men don't want to see a woman on top unless it's during sex.

Agreed. And that is why, when you're a woman in power, you've got to be

extremely careful.

Otherwise, they'll just write you off as some psycho feminist who's out to cut

off their testicles.

You've lost all credibility as far as I'm concerned.

Listen, Mac, you're smart, you're a babe. Use it. Yeah, take off your shirt

shake your tatas for the city council. That'll boost your popularity rating.

You threaten their sensitive little egos, they get you nothing.

So... So play them.

Who cares if they think of you as a sex object, as long as you get what you

want. You call yourself a feminist?

I prefer to think of myself as successful.

Oh, please. Why can't Mac be strong and intelligent and decisive?

Because... She's not a man.

Mac, can I talk to you for a second? Well, not now. Jimmy says you're

of cutting the coroner's office budget by 20%. That would be completely

detriment. You'll have to make an appointment with Rebecca, okay? What do

say to those critics who claim you're cheapening our city?

I say go back to your Adam Smith.

If it's not working, it deserves to die.

Hey, Max!

You got it! I got it!

Send us an ambulance.

Max has been shot. The mayor has been shot. Send an ambulance now,

Now!

We lost a lot of blood.

Close eyes. He's wide open with normal saline. Four units. O -neck, butt, stat.

CBC lights. Cross and type. Four units. On my count. One, two, three.

Decreased breath sounds on the left side. Let's get respiratory down here. I

need a chest x -ray. Stat. Keep desaturating. O2's in the 70s and

me a 14 -gauge needle and a chest tube tray. I thought I just heard what I just

got. Gunshot wound to the left chest with a rigid abdomen. End.

She's still hypotensive after two liters of saline. Looks like she got a tension

pneumothorax. Go wait for the x -ray. Hang on, Max.

Hang on, Max. Hang on.

O2's in the low 90s. BP's 90 over 60.

Kind of a nutcase for doing this. I heard he was wearing a Chuck Dante

We get a positive peritoneal lavage with a hemothorax. Looks like the bullet

passed through her chest into her abdomen.

Okay, come on, everybody. Let's get her ready for the OR.

Stay with us, Max.

Come on, baby.

Is that ORT ready?

W,

I'm here because your mother called me.

Let me guess, she's pissed.

Well, put it this way.

She's concerned.

And with good reason.

There are about 25 witnesses to the shooting. Half of them were reporters.

You'll be charged with attempted homicide, maybe murder.

Yeah, well, that's what happens.

You shot the mayor.

Maybe we should talk.

You don't think I know what this is about?

I know damn well what this is all about. I've been dealing with this crap my

whole life, okay?

See, nobody in this town ever thought that I could make a go of the store

Dad died.

Idiots!

I knew exactly what it needed.

Wider aisles, a gardening department, household appliances, a good return

policy. I double -sailed!

Well, that's all very well and good, Stubby.

Stupid Bimbo just wanted to take the whole thing away.

It's like Chuck says, the pizzification of America.

Chuck? Dante.

The radio guy.

Oh, he's got this whole thing. Peg, believe you me.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, she's picking on the little guys, and we're supposed to sit around and

just let that happen. We?

Did somebody put you up to this?

Whose side are you on, anyway?

I'll fire you in a millisecond. If I think you're going behind my back, pal,

understand me?

That's your prerogative. Damn right.

But I would think long and hard you committed a public crime.

I suggest that you shut up and play it my way.

How's she doing?

Her vitals are stable and her theft are good on 40%. But her urine output has

been borderline.

I hope we're not looking at renal failure.

I've got to go to the lab.

It's not the way it's supposed to be, Max.

Mr. Lama, you wanted to see me?

Oh, Kimberly.

Come in, Kimberly. Come in.

Your beautiful face has engraced this office for some time now. Come in. Sit

down. Sit down, my dear.

What do you want?

I need your help.

Oh, Mr. Wombat, I'm taking a full load at it again this year. Do you know

Muller? The guy who shot Max?

I'm representing him.

Now, that's a tough one. I need a lot of research from someone I can trust.

You're asking me to help defend the guy who shot Max?

But the facts aren't at issue, my dear.

I don't know, Mr. Wambaugh.

Stubby Muller is a nutso.

Oh, he's been delusional for years.

But quite harmless.

Until now.

What happened?

That's what we need to find out.

Well... Do you know anything about this Dante character?

Chuck Dante?

I've heard a show a few times.

Good. I'm going to need a lot of information.

Hey, babe, what are you doing here?

We got to talk.

Why start now?

Oh, God, I love your hair.

You heard what happened to the mayor?

Yeah.

a tough break. I mean, I just couldn't believe it.

I just spent the day trying to keep her alive.

Oh.

And, um, I'm a little bit bothered by the fact that the shooter was wearing

of your buttons.

You are?

Dad,

what is it with these sickos?

I don't even want to live in the same country as these idiots.

I don't know.

Come here.

You look like hell.

I don't even like you Shut up

I thought you were going to wait for me. We could have come home together.

She looks so small.

Max is tough, Jimmy.

And she's doing a lot better than we expected.

How many mares does this town have to lose before the sheriff's department

its job of protecting them?

Jimmy, you couldn't have known.

She was upsetting people.

She was making them mad. Things got out of control.

I should have... What?

I don't know. Gotten that guy off the radio. I don't know. Something. Oh, come

on, Jimmy.

I'm the sheriff, Jill.

My job is to protect.

And this is Max.

Let's face it. She's got that rich bitch, I don't give a crap, who I step

kind of thing happening. I mean, I grew up with girls...

Maxine Stewart.

Okay, she's good looking, but the woman is cold, man. I mean, what's her

problem? Doesn't she know she's hurting people? This chick doesn't have a

family, doesn't own a home, and yet in a minute and a half she makes a decision

that destroys lives. I hate her. Someone ought to destroy her livelihood. Do us

all a big favor.

What are you thinking?

Sure, Stubby is unstable, but what suddenly pushed him over the edge?

Let's say you're stubby.

You live in that crummy little apartment over your woefully outdated hardware

store.

No friends to speak of and no life outside your job.

So every day from 8 to 11, you listen to that guy over the radio. He is your

friend. He understands.

And in no uncertain terms, he tells you that Maxine Stewart is the enemy.

Your enemy.

So you agree with him.

Maxine Stewart is the cause of your problems.

So what do you do?

Get rid of the problem.

Hail Mary, full of grace.

The Lord is with thee.

Blessed art thou amongst women.

And blessed is the fruit of thy womb. thy womb, Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at

the hour of our death.

Hail Mary, full of grace.

It's my medical opinion that Mr. Muller suffers from paranoid personality

disorder. In response to stress,

Individuals with this disorder may experience brief psychotic episodes.

And in your opinion, Dr. Kelly, was Mr. Muller having one of those psychotic

episodes when he shot the mayor?

Yes. Based on my extensive examination of Mr. Muller and interviews with his

associates, my opinion is he was psychotic at the time of the shooting.

Finally, doctor, in your opinion, could Mr.

Muller distinguish right from wrong when he pulled the trigger?

In my opinion, he could not. No.

Thank you, doctor.

How much time did you spend in your extensive examination with the

doctor? About seven hours in all.

In those seven hours, you were able to determine beyond a shadow of a doubt

he has paranoid personality disorder?

That's my opinion, yes. Oh, your opinion.

In those seven hours, doctor, did you yourself ever see the defendant exhibit

any psychotic behavior?

No. No.

You know, Stubby Muller ran a business in Rome for 20 years.

He was treasurer of the downtown business association.

If he were as paranoid and delusional as you claim, how could he be capable of

that? People with paranoid personality disorder often appear to be quite

objective, even rational.

However, the superficial calm masks the extreme paranoia and deep distrust that

controls their life.

Yeah, we all knew Stubby was a little out there.

But he came to all the meetings.

And he knew how to add, so we made him association treasurer.

Objection to the term out there.

Okay. How about lunatic?

Objection! Sustained.

Let's just stick to the facts.

Very well.

Mr. Murka, did you ever see Stubby do anything to make you doubt his mental

stability?

Well, he was always suing everybody.

He thought water and power was contaminating his water. Stuff like

And there was a time he thought the guy at Barney's Big Brat had peed in his

drink.

Stubby smashed his windshield with a brand -new plumber's wrench.

And this is the man your organization put in charge of your entire annual

budget? Hey, the budget was only a few hundred dollars.

That was mostly for donuts at meetings and Christmas lights every year.

Besides, no one else wanted the job.

Nevertheless, Mr. Murkoff, you trusted him to control the books, didn't you?

Yeah.

Right.

How does it feel to be subpoenaed, Chuck? I'm getting a hot flag.

No, come on, guys.

It's a political trial, an effort to shut me up. These are from Maxine

But it's not going to work. I mean, they can't stop me because I've been through

it all.

Public school, IRS audit, premature ejaculation.

Come on, look. I had nothing to do with the shooting, but you watch. They're

going to try to crucify me on the stand.

And that, folks, is where your tax dollars are going. If you had nothing to

with it, what are you doing here, Chuck?

Hey, Maxine Stewart's a human being just like anybody else. I'm here just to

offer my condolences. Maybe I can even cheer her up.

What's going on?

Crazy man. Another crazy cop. Who the hell do you think you are coming in

You're a bummer. I should smack you right now.

Kenny! Well, get him out of here.

Mr.

Macho Man.

Geez, I'm just trying to be the nice guy here.

What if her little toady won't let me get close to her? Fine.

I've got better things to do.

Okay, guys, if we wanted to visit Stiff's, we could go down to the morgue.

go. Yeah, thank you.

Shut up.

Mr. Dante, how well do you know my client?

I don't. Well, never heard of him?

Well, not until he shot the mayor.

Isn't Stubby Muller the current president of the Chuck Dante Tri -County

Club? How am I supposed to know?

Well...

Here's a copy of the fan club's January 1996 newsletter.

And, Mr. Dante, their stubby name there is Biggest Day.

You're right. There it is. Well, that's news to me. Come on, look. These nimrods

get together, sit around the radio, and play with themselves.

I have nothing to do with them.

But you correspond with them, Mr. Dante.

What? I have here a letter dated February 1st, 1996.

I would like to read this letter.

Dear Chuck, I agree with you 100 % of what you said about the IRS.

From now on, if those bureaucratic bastards want my money, they're going to

to come and get it. Same goes for my ex -wife.

If that bitch whines any more about alimony, she'd better watch it. Ha, ha.

Hey, can you send me a T -shirt?

I'm an extra large.

Your number one fan, Stubby.

Do you remember receiving this letter?

Are you kidding? This is like 75 % of the letters, I guess.

But you responded to it.

That is your signature, isn't it? So what? Big deal. I mean, this is what we

send out to keep the freaks happy.

A form letter that says, don't give an inch, give him hell. Now your letter

that, doesn't it?

Objection, Your Honor.

This is pointless.

Overruled. For now.

But get on with it. So what you're saying is that the majority of your fans

nimrods and freaks.

Well, it's a hell of a job, but somebody has to do it. And yet, knowing the

questionable mental condition of some of your listeners, you still feel

comfortable advocating hatred on the air.

Objection, Your Honor. The issue here is the defendant's guilt, not Mr. Dante's

personality. The issue is whether this witness caused my client to have a

psychotic reaction.

The objection's overruled.

Referring to Maxine Stewart, you recently said on the air...

I hope something bad happens to the mayor, like cancer or AIDS.

Or better yet, someone should put her out of her misery.

Well, Mr. Dante, how are we supposed to interpret that? I'm a satirist.

Satirists say outrageous things. Hey, what we're talking about here is the

Amendment, okay?

I mean, all I do is say what the people out there are thinking, and then I give

my opinion, and that's all it is.

My opinion. I'm not the Dalai Lama. This isn't an absolute truth.

I mean, what are we, a nation of sheep? Just because there's so many crazies out

there that are willing to do something stupid doesn't make it my

It's not my responsibility.

Oh, not your responsibility?

No. You so much as said that you wanted the mayor to die that somebody should

put her out of her misery.

In effect, you were encouraging someone to do her harm, weren't you?

Words. That's all they are.

But words can do harm, Mr. Dante.

I'm an...

entertainer. Come on. It's the name of the game. It's all a game to you, isn't

it? You'd even advocate violence for an extra point in the ratings, wouldn't

you? Objection. Move to strike.

Wombo. That's enough. We're drawn.

Nothing further.

Mr. Dante, did you ever at any time encourage anyone to shoot or otherwise

Mayor Maxine Stewart?

No, I didn't. Did you have anything at all to do with the shooting of Maxine

Stewart? Absolutely not.

No further questions.

You may step down, Mr. Dante.

The court will take a 15 -minute recess.

Guess I thought he was You deserve better you

think so

Zach.

I've been reading up on serious injuries.

Did you know that the best therapy for the comatose is music?

Zach, Max isn't exactly, um... The sun will come

out tomorrow.

Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow there'll be sun.

Just thinking about tomorrow.

No.

No.

Max.

Max.

I'm in hell.

Someone keeps singing songs from Annie.

You're not in hell, Max.

That's Zach singing.

We all know Stubby Muller is mentally unbalanced.

That should come as a surprise to no one in this town.

However, Stubby managed to live here for 40 -odd years without harming a single

person until now.

So what happened?

I'll tell you what.

Chuck Dante.

Now think about it.

Think about the effect he's had on you. Why was he number one DJ in the Tri

-County area?

Because we found them compelling, amusing.

He said things many of us thought but wouldn't dare say.

Stubby was no different from me or you, except for one thing.

He wasn't stable.

So when Chuck Dante told him that Maxine Stewart was the cause of all his

troubles, you can bet Stubby believed them. That's how powerful Chuck Dante

He could push Stubby Miller...

onto the other side of reason. Well, Mr. Dante, well, he may have the right to

say whatever he wants, but his kind of power breeds hatred, sometimes even

violence.

Maxine Stewart was a victim of that twisted power, and so was Stubby Muller.

But just as sure as Stubby shot the mayor, it was Chuck Dante who pulled the

trigger. I urge you, please.

Finds Stubby Muller not responsible for this tragedy.

Ladies and gentlemen, let's get something straight.

Chuck Dante did not shoot Maxine Stewart. Stubby Muller did.

With malice aforethought, he bought a gun, he went to the courthouse, and he

waited. for her to appear.

Why? Because Maxine Stewart cast a deciding vote for what he perceived as a

destruction of his way of life. His motive was revenge, pure and simple.

Now, if Dobby Muller is insane, come on, we're all insane.

He knew the difference between right and wrong then, he knows it now, and we

should all recognize the defense strategy for what it is, a desperate,

attempt to shift responsibility from the real assailant to an imagined one.

It's a witch hunt.

Search for a scapegoat.

Don't you be fooled by it.

Dobby Muller shot Maxine Stewart.

Dobby Muller.

is on trial here.

Dobby Muller should go to jail.

All right, Bobby, welcome to the inferno.

Chuck, you suck.

That's cute.

A poem, something you wrote yourself?

You're everything that's wrong with America, Chuck. You're nothing but a

despicable, loud -mouthed Jew.

Oh, lovely sentiment, Bobby, but I got news for you. I'm not even Jewish. If

want to slur me, call me a kraut, you ignorant pig farmer.

What's the matter with you, Rome?

Lost your sense of humor?

Would the defendant please rise?

Madam foreperson, what say you?

In the matter of the people versus Stubby Muller on the charge of attempted

murder, we find the defendant not guilty.

What does this mean?

It means they think you're insane.

Congratulations.

Quiet.

Quiet. Quiet.

Well, you people never cease to amaze me.

So you think Stubby Muller is not guilty.

He was merely a tool in the hands of some radio announcer.

Will somebody please tell me what's happened to personal responsibility in

country?

Answer me this, people.

Who bought the gun?

Who pulled that trigger?

If you say Mr.

Mueller is crazy, so be it.

But don't think he'll be walking the streets of Rome any time soon.

I hereby find the defendant to be mentally ill and dangerous to the

I therefore commit Stubby Muller to the lock unit of the Mendota Mental Health

Institute in Madison.

Pending review of his mental condition by me in six months.

And I can tell you now, Mr. Muller, I think it extremely unlikely that you

be released before you serve the maximum term under the law, which by my

reckoning is about 17 years.

Bailiff, take the defendant into custody.

We're done.

They fired Chuck Dante today.

The Citizens for Cleaner Airways gathered 5 ,000 signatures and WXDE in a

show of courage sent him packing.

Now, doesn't that make us all feel better?

The big bad wolf has finally blown his own house down. Well, before you break

your arms patting yourselves on the back, consider this.

Chuck Dante.

is a product of our own making.

Without us niggering at his ugly, mean -spirited brand of humor, he would have

no show.

There's an animal that lives in all of us people.

Chuck Dante just knows its name.

And it's up to us to recognize this beast before it becomes us.

I know why I slept with Chuck Dante, folks.

Why did you?

And thank you, everybody.

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