Original subtitles

Okay, and Sonny.

Jill Brock, Joanna Diamond. Hey, I know you. You're Dr. Joey. Yes, that's right,

honey. Have a pencil.

Jill, one minute of your time.

God, what a morning.

There's no oxygen here, is there?

I'm in the middle of seeing patients. Could you wait out... No, unfortunately,

no. I've got to be at the... video in 20 minutes. You've seen my cable TV show?

Ask Dr. Joey. No, that's okay. I'll send you some tapes. Look, doctor whoever

the hell your name is, this is my office. Right, that's exactly why I'm

I'll tell you what I'm going to do.

I'm going to buy your practice.

What?

I've done my homework, Jill.

You are a hell of a doctor.

But that's not enough anymore, is it? Now, when we went to medical school,

was it all about?

The patient, right?

Nowadays, who the hell cares about the patient?

You do.

That's what makes you Rome's favorite pin -up girl.

I think you'd better leave. Yeah, but now you're tired, girlfriend.

You've been doing this, what, 10, 15 years?

And patient loyalty, what's that?

It's about as reliable as a rhythm method.

I mean, nowadays, it's all about HMOs, IPAs, PCNs, patient -based capitation,

compensation. I mean, is this medicine? I don't know. Is it big business? You

bet your ass.

Is it what you want to be doing? I don't think so. My practice isn't for sale.

Check your revenues, Jill.

Three years of steady decline.

Get kind of cold out there.

OmegaCare wants to take you under her wing, and it's getting pretty tempting.

I mean, you've got a husband, kids. How many hours a day do you want to work?

Reality check, Jill. Here are your options. A, you can stay in private

and watch your patients walk out the door, or B, go to OmegaCare and sell

practice to me while it's still worth something.

If you're not out of here in about two seconds, I'm grabbing you by that shawl

of yours and I'm throwing you out.

The idea scares you. That's okay. That's natural. Take some time.

Think about it. Oh, wow. I've got to get to makeup. Look, if you want to talk,

I'm listed. It's Joanna, no H1N, diamond as in a girl's best friend.

It's on the pencil.

Who would be crazy enough to ask that woman anything? She's a maniac.

The arrogance of that woman.

Assuming that I'm going to the HMO like I'm not tough enough to make it.

What is this? That she wants to buy a business? Yeah, she wants my office. She

wants my patient base.

If I go to the HMO, I'm going to have to leave a lot of my patients behind.

She's the kind to take on as much work as possible and hire some resident to

handle the caseload. Oh, get me the tomatoes, would you? Okay.

Medicine's a volume business, the doctor's life's turn.

Patients in, patients out. Honey, help out and get the napkins, okay? I can't

that to my people.

Pizza again?

Matthew, you know what? If you want something else, you cook it. I like it,

I thought you were considering you make a cure. Well, they've called me a few

times. That doesn't mean I'm considering it.

And don't even ask me to do that laundry.

Well, it's nice to see you, too.

Well, Kimberly, just in time for dinner.

Hi, honey. Welcome.

Hi, Danny.

How's it going?

Fine.

Hey, look, Mindy, if you're overweight, then stop eating so damn much. And get

off your fat butt and take a walk once in a while. I mean, you get to change

your life or shut up.

Cool. Zachary, turn that off and help me with the phone.

I like her.

She's kind of weird.

Dr. Joey, we watch her all the time at the house.

You do?

Uh -huh.

All right, next up, we've got Darren, who's concerned about the size of his

penis. Zachary, I mean it. Put the tomatoes in the salad for me, okay?

Jill. Oh, Jimmy, I have been on call every other night for a month. I'm a

bit tired.

What if I wear a white suit like John Travolta? John Travolta in Pulp Fiction?

Saturday Night Fever.

There's a dance room tomorrow night. Yeah. Remember? Okay.

Why do you want to look like John Travolta?

The 70s theme dance. He promised Matthew I'd help him with his costume. When did

you get interested in dance?

Since he met Gina Watson.

Shut up. All right, come on, everybody. Let's get out. Eat.

Okay. Hey, what about me?

Oh, I didn't know you were coming.

Take your plate.

Save a plate for you?

Wine, gentlemen?

Mouton cradé?

Not the baron's best, but still just the right oakeness for bouffant clout.

Bouffant what?

Beef in a pastry crust. I got it off of my Julia Child video.

Red wine gives me migraines.

Pour away, my good man.

He does this every night.

Four course meals.

Two different wines.

Man's got too much time on his hands.

You can consider yourself blessed, Judge.

My own Miriam is not exactly gifted in the culinary arts.

If it can't be boiled, Miriam won't cook it.

After 40 years of boiled, a man needs a little fried, a little roasted, a little

texture.

So you're kicking up your heels now that she's gone, huh?

What good? I should be so lucky.

This woman is having a hormone flashback.

I thought she was living at Selma Rubenthal's. It happened before. To tell

the truth, I've hardly noticed her absence.

A man has only one wife, Douglas.

And so what good does it do us?

After 40 years, you would think that a man earned a certain amount of loyalty.

And then they turn on you in the slightest provocation.

Frankly, I thought you were over the top at your anniversary party. So I told a

few jokes.

Guilty as charged.

The people expect it. I'm a character.

It's her problem if she doesn't have a sense of humor.

Word is you tried to kick her out of the bathtub during the tornado.

What kick? I got there first.

There was plenty of room for her under the sink.

I know in retrospect that it looks bad, but who is to know that she would take

it so personally?

Jill. Hey, Howie. What are you doing here? I'm on call tonight.

Didn't I mean to tell you? I'm not in the call group anymore.

What? Quit private practice.

Joined Omega Care.

Couldn't hack fee -for -service.

Really? Hey, the dock -eat -dock world out there. I figure surrender now or get

frozen out later.

He kidnapped you and tried to rape you? Not

true! She's going to be my wife!

Liar! Liar!

Look, pal, I don't know where you're from, but that's not how it works here,

okay? That means you're going to have to come with me.

I mean, they were forced into Laos in the 1800s and became part of the Laos

song. They're mountaintop people. Who cares where they came from, Carter? You

have to consider the context, Max. You can't just jump to conclusions.

Conclusions? The guy kidnapped the girl. He was going to rape her. Max. The

Hmong are traditional people. One could even say primitive by our standards.

That doesn't make them wrong, necessarily.

That was a buddy of mine in the Western Force.

He says the Hmong have been in all kinds of trouble over there.

It's complicated, Kenny.

You have to remember, the CIA recruited the Hmong to fight for our side in

Vietnam and then abandoned them. They've been persecuted horribly.

Not our problem, Carter.

Maybe not yours, Max.

I'm part of a church liaison committee helping them resettle in this country,

Jimmy. They're really quite delightful people. We're willing to help you,

Carter, but this is a serious situation.

Your boy is facing felony charges.

Break it up.

What's going on?

His father says not pay for his daughter.

Pay? It's customary for the... He says

no chicken ceremony, no sex. They're not

married. He no pay.

Delightful.

Douglas Fombo for the yellow pimpernel.

Where's my client?

Your client?

Thank you, Carter, for the referral.

Where's Mr.

Kang Boo?

Boo -eh.

Whatever.

I'm here to secure his release.

Carter. Carter.

Carter.

It's so refreshing to see Christians and Jews uniting in the spirit of honest

litigation.

Oh, Douglas, there you are.

Miriam.

Miriam. You've come back to your senses.

What did I tell you, gentlemen?

They always come back.

Douglas, is there somewhere we can talk?

Does it look like I have time to talk?

I forgive you, Miriam. Now go home.

What's that?

Papers.

I'm divorcing you, Douglas.

What? You heard me. I want a divorce.

Miriam, so I wouldn't let you sit in the bathtub.

For this you want a divorce?

I deserve something better. What better?

Oh, how about someone who talks to me when they see me, who smiles at me when

sees me in the morning, who says please and thank you and I love you just every

now and then.

Oh, what makes you think you deserve that?

It's a joke, Miriam.

Goodbye, Douglas.

Fine. Go.

Good riddance.

Penny, I haven't got all day.

Let me see Mr. Boo.

Whatever.

No flowers. This place already looks like Martha Stewart on a bad day.

Let's try to find a little personality.

Excuse me.

Which do you like better?

You get out of my office.

Now.

Ever dance naked for a room full of men, Jill?

Of course not. But I have.

I'm calling the sheriff. And I can tell you from personal experience, it's

humiliating. Still, I learned something about myself. You don't get it, do you?

I learned that I am capable of doing whatever I needed to to get what I want.

See, I didn't grow privileged like you.

I had to put myself through medical school. And these breaths paid for four

years at Georgetown, and I am not ashamed to say it.

Yes, honey, you heard it here first.

You're going to want to catch this next part.

After our conversation, I decided to take matters into my own hands.

I bought the building.

What?

Negotiations were a bitch.

But this building has been in Jim Harvey's family for 50 years.

Everybody has their price, Jill.

This is where I practice medicine.

I've been here for 13 years. I have a leave.

Which expires in six months.

Unfortunately, it won't be up for renewal.

I'm going to need the space.

It's the best location in Rome.

Anyhow, don't let us get in your way.

You know, I want to thank you so much. I've been trying to... Hey, Locos.

What's a tornado in a marriage got in common?

At first, there's a lot of blowing, and then you lose the house.

And then you lose the house, man. You're very funny, but I'm busy right now.

What's this? It's video Valentine's. What's that?

Nothing. Okay.

Whoa, great idea.

You mean you check out the babes on videotape and you don't even have to

them? You find anything good?

Nah.

I don't know who can tell from two minutes on the screen.

This one wants Arnold Schwarzenegger, the other one wants a rich, genius wine

connoisseur. All I know is no one's looking for Kenny Lacos, that's for

They're probably all lying anyway.

Whoa, buddy, if I'd have known you were hard up, my wife's got a few single

friends I could... I'm not hard up.

I'm just broadening my horizons, okay?

You say tomato, I say tomato.

So after that maniac left, I called Roger and I had him run the numbers.

She's right.

Who was?

Dr. Joey. Oh, God, I hate that name.

What did she write about? That I'm losing revenue. I can't afford the rent

new office.

You know, this is really good. I know. I made it.

You know me, Jimmy. I don't pay much attention to the dollars and the cents.

according to Roger, at this rate, with all the patients leaving, everybody at

the brewery is going to the HMO, I won't be breaking even in a year. And we

can't afford that, not with Kimberly planning on medical school and the boys

going off to college.

Oh. What?

Tonight is Matthew's school dance. Oh, honey, please just calm down. It's going

to be all right. You'll find another office. Jimmy, you're not listening to

I can't afford another office. The Harveys haven't raised the rent on me in

years.

Maybe I should talk to the HMO.

Whatever you decide, I'm with you. You know that.

But... I do think the kids miss you a bit.

Oh, terrible mother.

They're not.

You are a wonderful mother.

But you have been under the gun a little bit lately, and I think it's making you

very unhappy.

Now, if the HMO means less stress, more time with the family, then what are we

talking about?

People versus voodoo. Your honor, this whole brouhaha is the result of a simple

misunderstanding which I can't... Kidnapping and attempted rape is not a

misunderstanding. Anyone want to make a plea here?

Not guilty.

Fine. Sit down.

Is there a question of bail?

Yes, your honor.

Shame on you.

My client has no record.

He's practically indigent. Where would he go? Back to Laos?

The charges are assault and battery, kidnapping, and attempted rape.

We're talking about a possible 20 -to -life sentence.

I think there's plenty inducement for the defendant to disappear.

Gentlemen, gentlemen, talk to me.

Your Honor, Mr. Bouet was only doing what any red -blooded Hmong male is

expected to do when his heart is smitten by a lovely young lady.

Take her home.

meet the folks, get their blessings, and kill the chicken.

That's a tradition.

The young girl is supposed to protest to prove her virtue.

Now, how is he to know that she really meant it? Your Honor, in some Middle

Eastern countries, if a man suspects his wife of infidelity, he's allowed to

chop off her hand.

Now, that may be tradition also, but we don't allow it here.

Our culture views the tradition the defense speaks of as barbarism.

Not marriage as we recognize it. Your Honor, who is the judge here? You or the

prosecution?

I imagine you would have a problem with the arranged marriages of my

grandparents, too. But they seem to work out pretty well. So who are we to say

that it was our way or the highway?

What does our culture promote when we really get down to it?

A union based on the improvable principle called love.

Now, what is that anyway?

In truth, nothing more than an illusion.

Marriage is barbarism.

And we only have to... Save it for trial, Wombo.

I've heard enough.

I'm setting bail at $10 ,000.

What'd that mean?

Go back to jail?

Temporarily, until we win this case.

And if we don't?

Wombo does not lose.

That's another tradition.

Matthew?

Night, Mom.

Honey, wait.

Honey, can I talk to you?

Nice costume.

Elvis, huh?

Vegas years.

I thought it was a disco dance.

I guess this is as close to disco as Dad gets.

Oh, Matthew, I'm sorry, honey.

Don't worry about it, Mom.

Only a few hundred people made me feel like a total geek.

Gina spent all night dancing with Greg Braxton.

But I'll get over it.

Eventually. Oh, Matthew, I really wanted to help you, but Carolyn Truncato went

into labor.

That's okay, Mom.

I'm used to it.

One of my main concerns is that my patients can follow me here. Oh, we'd

have them.

That reminds me, salary and benefits package.

Yearly bonuses are determined by your productivity. Now, that's based on

that are set by our quality assurance and utilization review committee. It's

very streamlined.

Catch this.

Hi, I'm Sonia Burma, an OBGYN here at OmegaCare. I've been in practice for 10

years and... The Doc's lucky thing.

Hey, it'd be great to have your video bio right in there with everyone else's,

Jill. Now, let's talk about some of your other concerns.

Call schedule. All of our docs work three to five days a week.

Calls once every tenth day and every seventh weekend. Period.

And don't forget about our 24 -hour nurse hotline.

No more 3 a .m. calls about little Johnny's earache.

Let's see, what else?

Oh, yes, what about my Medicaid patient?

To be honest with you, Jill, We find that OmegaCare is so busy providing the

best care to our member patients that we're just not able to squeeze those

patients in.

I'm sure that you understand our predicament.

Cappuccino? And what if I want to squeeze them in, my Medicaid patients?

Well, let me talk to the big guys and get back to you on that. I imagine

something could be worked out.

You see, we pride ourselves here.

on being sensitive to the needs of both patients and doctors.

So how does it sound?

Oh, it sounds great.

Go.

What's going on, Carl?

I saw the way me looked at you in court.

What's the story?

You know each other?

She work at Stan Donut.

I buy chocolate donut every day.

She smile to me.

I smile to her.

I think she like me.

I think she young, have many baby.

I want to marry her.

Let me get this straight.

I'm a little confused here.

Where you come from?

You see a girl?

You like the girl?

You just take the girl home and that's it?

Get out of here.

We call it... My parents do it.

Their parents do it.

Everyone do it.

This is America, Khan.

In this country, if you want a woman, you gotta put a little effort in.

Take the lady out to dinner.

Spend a little dough on her. Tell her she's beautiful, even though she might

be that hot.

Then you try and make her think that you're one of those sensitive types, you

know? Say stuff like, uh... Did you see that beautiful sunrise?

Wow.

You married?

No.

You have girlfriend?

No.

What the hell do I know?

Oh, this is it. The two -note trump.

Oh, no, Miriam.

Huh? What do you mean, no? That's all right. Two -note trump. No, it's your

husband.

Oh, God.

Miriam, you're lucky I'm speaking to you after that stunt you pulled yesterday.

Douglas, please.

What?

You can't divorce me. I refuse.

What are you talking about?

You know as well as I do, under Jewish law, it is the man that has to agree to

get and I don't agree.

Can't you see you make her miserable?

Shut up. Oh, I can't take this anymore.

Every day with you is like living in the middle of a circus and I am the trained

bear. Well, I don't want it.

I've had enough. I want a real life while I'm still healthy enough to enjoy

Don't make me laugh, Miriam. I may be a character, but I'm the best thing that

ever happened to you.

Come here.

Play, play.

Douglas.

You haven't touched me since 1978.

And sometimes a woman needs to feel wanted, attracted, something.

So if you won't give me a get, I'm going to go to the bet then. And I'm going

to. Tell them that you have not fulfilled your husbandly duties.

It's up to you.

Miriam, I will never, ever give you a get.

You can be assured of that.

I'll take one of those chocolate ones with the jimmies on them.

45 cents.

So, how you been?

Look, I know this is none of my business, but I saw the way you looked

the other day, and it occurred to me that maybe things have gone a little bit

too far.

I not want to marry him. I don't blame you.

You hardly know the guy, and what he did was out of line, but I've been talking

to the guy lately, and he seems pretty okay to me.

He all right?

Me? Let me give you a hypothetical.

For instance, let's say none of these incidences had occurred and Kong walked

tomorrow and said he'd like to take you out for a cup of coffee, a cup of tea,

whatever. What would you say? Would you go?

No.

Why not?

You're not my type.

Okay. Fair enough.

I don't know. I guess I hate to see this dragged out in court, especially if it

doesn't have to be.

More trouble for me, more trouble for you.

Sorry to bother you.

And I'd only have to be on call once every ten days.

So I'm torn.

You should have seen that clinic, Jimmy. It was incredible.

Have you heard anything I've said?

Jimmy, I'm trying to get a little input here.

Just get in the end of the paragraph here.

What?

Never mind, never mind.

Oh, Jill.

Jill, Jill, Jill, I'm sorry.

I'm just saying the hours would be great, the calls manageable, and I

have to worry about keeping my own practice afloat.

Yeah? Do I want to know what you think?

Well, I think it could be just the thing you need in the family, too. Yes, but

there are other things to consider besides our own comfort.

I mean, what about my indigent patients? What are they supposed to do?

There is a county health department. Where they have to wait for hours to see

doctor that they don't even know. And take care of everyone, Jill. Do you know

that at OmegaCare you can't even talk to your own patients on the phone? And

there's all this talk about productivity, which really makes me

fine.

Don't do it if you don't think it's the right thing. But I don't know if it's

the right thing or not, Jimmy. That's what I'm trying to talk to you about.

You're not being very helpful.

You don't really want to hear my opinion, Jill. You just want to go on

until you come up with the right answer.

Oh.

Damn it to hell.

Oh, I've got to go.

What's up with that?

Asparagus brain.

Jill? Ava.

I hit my head on a hanging plant.

I'm so tired I can't even see straight.

Does Jimmy know? He's parking the car.

Go into curtain one. I'll call the attending.

Well, let me take a look.

What are you doing here? It's your lucky night, honey. I'm the doc on duty. What

happened to you?

Not so fast.

Let me clean it up a bit. See what we got.

4x4s, 1 % lidocaine with.

Okay, I'm going to numb you up a bit.

You little beast thing. This is ridiculous.

I'm okay.

Jill, I'm the doctor. You're the patient. Live with it.

Wait till you see the color. I'm going to paint your exam room.

Clover Sweet.

You are the single most obnoxious woman I have ever met.

You've obviously never met my mother.

Help me out here.

You have enough money to buy my practice, buy my building, effectively

life. What are you doing moonlighting at midnight in the yard?

Keeping up my skills.

Getting to know the local docs.

Not to mention the fact that every patient who comes through on my shift

personal invitation for a follow -up visit with Dr.

Joey Diamond at her new office.

You've got to work all the angles, Jill.

Oh, by the way, I've got news for you. I'm not rich. Try leverage to the gills.

Never was one to play it safe.

Eva, 30 Vicryl, 30 Nylon. What are you doing?

Well, you have penetrated the galea here, honey.

We're going to have to do a two -layer closure, so just put your feet up, lay

back, relax.

You're in good hands with Dr. Joe.

All right, me.

Once we're in court, I'll lead you through the incident step by step, just

we did in here.

Don't worry, I won't throw any surprises at you, okay?

How long you got to jail for this?

Realistically, it could be...

Up to 20 years, but you shouldn't be thinking about that.

I want to talk to him.

I don't think that's a very good idea, me. I want to talk to Kong.

Son of a bitch.

What makes you think I want to marry you?

Speak English now.

We're in America.

I thought you like me.

You smile to me.

I smile at everyone.

I sell more donuts that way.

You don't like me?

Not really.

I don't want to marry anyone right now.

I want to go to college.

I don't want anyone telling me what to do.

Look, guy, I love our culture.

The customs, the music.

But at this point, I've got to go.

You understand?

I understand nothing in this country.

Maybe you need to watch more TV.

She's a tough little bird. I know the type.

Well, I advised her against this. I don't trust that guy.

He's all right. He just didn't understand the rules.

Who does?

It's okay now.

I no need to testify in court.

You not do it again.

May I say what a delightful young woman this is. The quality of mercy is not

strange. Lee, consider what you're saying.

Now, Kong kidnapped you. He was going to force you to have sex with him.

I can't just drop the charges.

Without a complaining witness, you're going down a long, hard road, my friend.

He's sorry.

You're right.

You're not such a bad guy.

See you around.

I'm sure that my client will be willing to accept probation.

Terms to be negotiated, of course.

Of course.

Well,

you must be pretty proud of yourself.

Got that poor girl to feel sorry for Kong?

All I did was try to get her to see he wasn't such a bad guy.

What's it to you, anyway?

He practically drags her off by her hair and you try to fix them up on a date?

Hey, maybe they like each other.

If I can get two people together, why shouldn't I?

Anyway, it's their culture, Max. It's different to ours.

It's Neanderthal.

To you, maybe.

To me, in a strange way, it kind of makes sense.

I mean, look at the way we do it here.

All this whining and dining.

The way we lie about ourselves.

Where does it get us?

Look at you, Max.

You're so smart.

And look at me.

We're both alone.

I'm telling you, if I could just reach out and grab what I want and take it

with me, maybe I'd do it.

And maybe I'd be a lot happier.

And maybe you'd be in jail.

What's wrong, Mom?

Oh, nothing, honey. Just the groceries.

No. You seem sad or something. Oh, I'm not sad. I'm just tired. I've been

working really hard lately and it's starting to get to me.

Why don't you take a vacation?

Oh, I'd love to.

Who would take care of my patients?

Some other doctor.

Oh, all the doctors I know have joined this big group called Omega Healthcare.

So why don't you join me?

Well, it's not as simple as that.

I guess I like to do my own boss, and I don't like somebody telling me how to

practice medicine.

You know who you're like, Mom?

Who? That old lad, Josie Wales.

You know, the police would move you.

I saw it over at Nikki Weiss's house. Zach, I don't like just seeing all that

violent stuff.

But, Mom, it's so cool. You see, it's after the Civil War, and the whole

has changed, and everyone thinks that Josie should surrender.

But... These guys from the North killed his family, so Josie won't surrender.

Even though all his friends do, because Josie doesn't trust the guys from the

North.

And it turns out that Josie was right, because the guys from the North end up

killing all his friends, and then they go after Josie.

Then what happens?

Well, Josie gangs up with this funny Indian guy and, you know, a couple of

people, and the bad guys chase him around the country.

Don't Josie ever give up?

Mom. He's Clint Eastwood.

Finally, he goes into this big showdown and does what a guy has to do.

Oh, what's that?

He gets mean.

Plum, mad dog, mean.

So there I was on the psychiatric ward, half dead from an eating disorder, out

of my mind with PMS, and I decided maybe I just need to date more.

I'm looking for a guy who doesn't have a criminal record.

The last thing I want is a serious relationship.

I have no time for serious, okay?

I mean, whatever happened to just going out, sharing a good cabernet, talking

about James Joyce and getting naked?

That's my idea of a perfect date.

The status is a bitch, girlfriend, but it's all in the position.

Take a look at chapter 23.

My husband just loves you, Dr. Joey. And I love him. What's his name? Willis.

Excuse me, I need to talk to you.

Jill. I'm selling books here. It's important.

So is selling books.

I've reconsidered your offer.

Thank you.

And?

I have a counterproposal.

Is there somewhere we can talk?

I think we should be partners.

I don't need a partner. Yes, you do.

You may be a hell of a marketer. You may even be a good doctor.

But you've got one big problem.

Your patient retention rate is miserable. You need me. I know how to

patients. You're on, Jill.

I just need your patience. If you took over my practice, they'd be running for

the door.

Oh, yeah? Yeah, I know these people. And they expect to be treated like more

than numbers on an accountant's ledger. I don't think that you're capable of

that.

So, you've got a great bedside manner.

Whoopee. Just means that you're slower. You see fewer patients. That doesn't do

me any good. Look.

We both want to be independent. We just want it for different reasons. You want

the money. I want my patients to be treated the way I want them to be

Much as it sickens me to say this, we need each other.

I've got the personal touch. You've got the marketing savvy.

And the TVQ? Right.

Alone, we're two women battling a medical delivery system that wants to

both obsolete.

Together, we could be a force to be reckoned with.

So here's the deal.

50 -50 split, no cash out.

55 -45, I'll be seeing more patients. 50 -50, take it or leave it. And I don't

care what you do on your own time, but there's no smoking in my practice.

So... I guess I'll have to change the pencils.

Open up, Selma. I know she's in there. Go home, Douglas. She doesn't want to

you. I don't want to talk to you, you old stick.

Get my wife.

What? Miriam, we can't work out our problems when there's a door in between.

Who says I want to work out our problems?

All right, Miriam, you win.

You want sex?

I'll give you sex. Douglas, are you out of your mind? Keep your pants on or I'll

call the police. So call.

Miriam, if a little nookie won't do the trick, I'm going to resort to more

serious measures.

Douglas, don't you dare. I'm going to sing, Miriam. You're forcing me to sing.

I'm going to call the police.

Go ahead, call the police already. Go, go.

Douglas, it's over. I am not going back to you. You made me feel so young.

You made me feel there are songs to be sung and bells to be rung and a

fling to be flung.

And when I'm old and gray, I'll be just like I am today.

Cause you made me feel so young. Oh, Miriam, baby.

You made me feel so young.

They ran out of popcorn.

you like wine.

I like wine, too.

I gotta be honest with you.

I like beer better.

Me, too.

Hey, uh, that Joyce guy you talked about in your video?

Yeah.

You write anything I would've heard of?

Beats me.

Someone just told me to say that if I wanted to get a sensitive guy.

Yeah?

Yeah.

Well, uh, it worked.

Cheers.

our true love.

Though a word wasn't said, the world wasn't bloom.

There were stars in the sky except for the view that were there in

your eyes.

Dear as I held you so close to my... Don't sing.

She had no right to do it, Jimmy.

She has no reason to complain.

I gave her a house over her head, her own credit card, a new winter coat every

third year. Don, it's a free country.

Now, if she doesn't want to be with you right now, she doesn't have to.

Now, you're creating a deterrence. Please, let's just call it a night,

All right. All right. Yeah, okay, okay.

Oh, wait, wait, wait.

She loved this one.

Oh. Oh, you beautiful doll, you great big beautiful doll.

Let me put my arms around you. I cannot live without you. Oh,

you beautiful doll, you great big beautiful doll. Selma, evening, William.

We could have him arrested. Is that what you want, Mary?

Oh, oh, oh, you beautiful doll.

Turn out the lights. Maybe he'll go away.

Good night. Good night.

Let me put my arms around you. If you'd ever leave me, how my heart would ache.

I would love to hug you, but I fear you'd break.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, you beautiful doll.

Oh, you beautiful doll, you great big beautiful doll.

Let me put my arms around you. I cannot live without you.

Really? The outlaw, Jody Whale.

They can't shoot through it, but they might be able to dig a hole in it and

down, maybe in the back bedroom.

You watching Clint Eastwood?

Wait a minute, this is my favorite part. Watch this.

If things look bad, it looks like you're not going to make it.

Then you've got to get mean.

I mean plum, mad, dog mean.

Because if you lose your head and you give up, then you neither live nor win.

That's just the way it is.

I would try to say all I want you.

Next on Picket List.

Long time no see, bro.

Jimmy, you know those three guys who broke out of Joliet?

Ripon Police just picked up one of them 20 minutes ago. They think the other two

are headed our way. How long do you think it's gonna take for the cops to

out that we're brothers? They're gonna be here in a second. Wake up!

Let me go, man!

I'm not going back inside.

I've got you and the little girl. Look, if you want her, you're gonna have to

kill me first.