Original subtitles

I look like this. You need one of my mum's cookies.

I can't go to the stand still. Oh man, that'll freak me out more.

You do some of your best thinking, Stone.

He can't let go of Aurora.

He does actually have quite good reasons to feel guilty and majorly fucked up.

Now I know you're really depressed and quite screwed up, but you can't hold all

the dishes.

Pissed off.

Stand back from the door. I repeat, stand back from the door.

Whoa. Oh, don't worry about it. It happens to everyone.

Not me.

Didn't they put a hole in your head to stop you doing that?

Needs must.

I'm not peeing in the bushes.

You used to try for them when you were a model. What's the difference?

Bet Imram's family pee in the bushes all the time.

Bruce's family are from Pukekohe.

What's going on?

Good news, Van remembered to lock the toilet door. Bad news is that he's

out in there.

Why does this house only have one fog?

Van, get your ass out here now.

Van, Mum, we've tried, Walter.

Can you bust this door down?

Only just put the blooming lock on it. Be like the old days when you used to

kick them in for a living.

What's up with Jack?

Oh, if Pascal got declined at the pub.

Hey, are you going to kick the door so hard that it'll splinter into a million

pieces? I might.

Oh, if I kick this door in and Van's passed out on the floor, the door's

to swing in and hit him. So?

So, if his head is just the other side of the door... We'll take our chance and

kick it down. Hurry up, I'm busting.

Oh, gross.

Get him out of there. Get him out of there now.

I know, Ben.

I know,

Ben. In we go.

Yeah, it's all shit.

Reckon we should do something about it, eh? What do you say?

A miracle.

It's been running.

No, it isn't.

Do you have something to do with this?

Get out.

No.

Yes. No.

Yes.

You're doing a piss.

Told you no piss for breakfast, and we've got things to do.

I told you to piss off.

Yeah, and I'm not listening.

Van, honey, you're drinking way too much at the moment. And speaking for all of

us, we are so, so over it. Even though we know you're, like, suffering heat,

we're still over it.

Who's the person?

Sit down, Van.

Sit down.

Eat your breakfast.

You and I got things to do in Donaghy.

One of those things fixing the toilet door.

I'll get around to that.

I eat woman.

It's called daylight, Ben.

Come on, get in the car.

Thanks for this.

It's all right. The last thing you need is two useless barclays hanging around

the house. You're not useless just because your car got declined.

Yeah, you're really good at breaking down toilet doors. Right. You're

Go.

Van has left the building. It's a miracle.

Right. Now we're clean.

Excuse me?

Van's room needs to be fumigated. Oh, my God. I'm not going anywhere near there

without full body armour.

No,

that room has diseases in it that no one's even heard of or discovered.

Yeah, but...

For us to even have a TV.

Supposed to be a seminar on that too, eh? Well, how the hell should I know?

Mate, I don't like it any more than you do.

We're in the same boat, so... I'm on a fucking different boat and you know it,

mate.

Do you want to be a kept man at your mum's house as a rest?

Come on, we're getting jobs.

Yep, I can start any time you like.

I had a job once, managing a school.

Had a lot of things once.

But you should probably know I have some availability issues in terms of full

-time employment in the mid to long -term future.

No, I don't want a job.

And why would you give me one when there's no fucking point? Because I'm

Well, the charges are bullshit and I'll get off them.

But yes, they are honesty -type charges, fraud -type charges.

Now I've got this curse on me.

Right, so there's no point doing anything.

Because no matter what I do, it's all going to turn to shit.

So, nothing matters.

I'm appointed.

I'm here.

I'm ready.

I'm willing. I'm more able than most of these useless bastards you've got in

this place.

I just... I just have availability issues. Thanks for your time.

Here with you?

Yeah, he's here.

Where's he?

Oh, um, the rest are now.

Is he all right?

I suppose it's a matter of degree, Mr Judd.

Listen, I've got to go and see some old mates, try and rustle up some work.

Don't let him out of your sight.

Three days.

And Munter? Yeah?

Try not to let him drink himself into a coma.

Fuck.

I've got to go.

Hey,

we're out of here, bro. Oh, we just got here. Yeah, just in time to go.

Dan, babe!

Poor, poor baby. I'm so sorry about all that.

What are you drinking?

We're going, eh?

Where? We've got that stuff to do down at the park.

What, play frisbee?

Look, you wouldn't understand.

I have a beer.

No, what you need is fresh air, bro, not pissing up in here all day.

Do you want a tequila sip of that?

Yep. Hey, I'm here for you, babe.

All the way.

Then we should go.

You stay here with her, bad things are going to happen.

So? She'll get her hooks back into you and there's no one to stop her.

You'll end up doing things that you don't want to do and you don't do that

anymore, remember? No, you don't do that shit anymore.

You want to know why?

Why? Because Casey's got your balls in her pocket, mate.

She's turned you into a pussy whip little bitch.

You go hanging out with that hoe, it's disrespecting to Aurora's memory.

What do you think Aurora would say?

I don't want to be dead. Fuck, that's not funny.

If she could see you right now, bro, she'd be spewing.

No, she'd get it.

She'd get how I feel.

We all get how you feel.

No, you don't. No, you just fucking do.

Hey,

Flanny. Sergeant Wayne.

Hi.

Go back to school now, thank you very much. Go back to school.

Yeah, just doing some fundraising for the church.

Flanny, I'm not a cop anymore.

Yeah. Sorry, I keep forgetting.

Have you seen Van and Munter?

Pen.

Plenty. Not a cop.

Sorry, you've just still got that way of asking questions.

Have you seen Van with Munter in here?

No, I just got here.

You want a beer?

Yeah, why not?

Hard life being a man of leisure.

Not my choice, trust me.

I wouldn't mind.

Look at me, I've rushed off my feet.

I need a job.

There must be heaps of jobs out there for a next cop.

Not this one.

No way.

Not a thing.

Not even the guy on the bank with the walkie -talkie.

Not even that.

Wow, that's low.

See, I'm a duty cop now, Filani.

It's funny how your friends disappear when you're duty.

I suppose so.

Work and income were very helpful, though.

At what?

Let's wait for the outcome of your trial, Mr Judd, then we'll reassess.

You told Wynne about the charges.

Oh.

Where do they hear it from me?

When you hand it in your bag, so you hand it in your brain as well.

No, no, no.

Now you're one of us. You've got to start using the top two inches.

Be sharper, like me.

Yeah, because you're a raging success, you are, Filani.

Oh, ways of gratitude.

Yeah, I'm in a position to offer you a job.

Yeah, Filani, I didn't end up here to start flogging stolen goods.

Hey, that is a slanderous accusation.

Another beer?

Yeah, sure.

No, no, this is straight up, man.

You know, an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Cash.

Yeah, I don't think so. We're all lost.

Mr. Man of Leisure.

Well, we've got to do something.

God, you're meant to be the one with the brains.

I'm not having anything to do with it.

Hey, whose car is that in the driveway?

Mum, there's a bit of a problem.

What where?

At the moment, the toilet.

Oh.

It's because Wayne didn't fix the door. It's Van's still in there. No, but

close.

Hi, Sarah.

What the fuck is she doing in there? They were fucking on the couch when we

home. Oh, Van, no!

Oh, Van, yes.

Thankfully they took the freak show to his room when we started chucking stuff

at them.

I thought Wayne was meant to be looking after Van.

Flush, you bitch.

She didn't even wash her hands.

You know what your problem is?

Other than you kicking my ass in the pool.

It's that you don't think outside the square.

I is.

And which square would that be?

Me. I'm thinking outside the square all the time.

And that's why I'm here and running a business.

Put him to rust off my feet.

That's why I employ my nephew.

Even though he's an idiot, he's cheap. You see?

Outside the square.

Yeah, there's just one small point there, Filoni.

I'm not an idiot.

All right, you can get a job and then you can pay me back the money you owe me

later. What? What do you mean?

You think we're playing pool for fun?

Hey,

Shrill, what's up?

Where the fuck are you?

You lost him.

While I was looking for a job, he... he took off.

Did you find a job?

I phoned Munter. He was with him last I heard.

He's not with him now, though, is he?

This little pig, he's stuffed up.

I had other things to do.

I thought Van was under control. Yeah.

I bet you'll crap it past the parcel when you're a kid.

Do you want to tell me what happened?

You don't want to know.

Yeah, I do want to know how for the first time in ages Van leaves the house

then ends up in the sack with Braska bloody Dostlik.

I tried my best, Mrs. West. Honestly, I did.

I want to go somewhere.

Piss off, then. Don't let us stop you.

Come on, baby.

I want to have some fun, and you need to have some fun. That's what you need.

Not a good idea, bro.

Stop being such a pussy munter.

Yeah, stop being such a pussy munter.

What do you mean, Mrs. Wistel? 12 more beats?

Same as the day the standard of West Auckland policing has seriously gone

downhill since you left the force. I'm amazed we all weren't arrested.

So how come he ended up back here without you?

Well, there comes a point, you know, when a line gets crossed and you've just

got to walk away.

Hey, man, this is way out of order.

Look, stealing cars from disabled people is wrong.

Fuck them.

This is all because of a cripple.

Oh, yeah, way to get back to type and way to put the label on.

Are you coming or not?

None. See you, Manta.

This can't be here.

If this is here, it'll give them an excuse to put you back inside.

I'll deal with it. No, you won't. Pascal, take this down to the mall and

it there.

I have a respectable job and a fiancé.

I'll do it.

No, you won't. Mum, the chance of getting caught when here in the mall is

minuscule. But if we do, who is the only one here young enough to get diversion?

Okay.

Don't forget to wipe it for prints.

Oh, hurry back.

Okay.

Hello for Fulani. Loretta West here.

Here we go.

Ta.

No,

get your own.

So what are we going to do about Van?

I'll show you.

Van, can you get up now?

Piss off.

Bust this one down too.

What, I haven't fixed a lot?

Okay.

Oh, I don't want to see. Piss off!

Fuck, get out of here!

No, you get out of my house now. You get your clothes and you leave.

Pascal? Pascal, can you help Draska find her clothes and then make sure she

leaves? I'm going to go just because you say so.

Don't you argue with me.

Yeah.

Shower time again? Yeah.

Yeah.

Come on, boy.

Sorted. Car's gone.

Not coming back.

Sorry you had to get caught up in it.

Okay, for the good of the family, et cetera.

If I could turn the clock back and bring Aurora back, I would.

We all would.

It's not going to happen, Van.

We've just got to figure out a way of getting through this.

You've got every right to be angry with the world, Van. No one is denying you

that. But the kind of shit you've been pulling lately, it's got to stop.

I'm not having you put the family at risk the way you did today.

Have you got anything you want to say about that?

Van, you've got to snap out of this because I am really scared about where

you're going to end up. Me too.

Forget him. He's cursed. That's enough of that shit, Ted.

You bring it on.

Van, don't be a dick. There is no curse on this family, except maybe for

Drasker. You don't know anything.

I'm just trying to help, Van.

I don't need your help.

I don't need anything from any of you.

Really?

Is that what you think?

Yeah.

Well, you like having a roof over your head, do you?

Like having someone put you back to bed because you passed out in the toilet?

You like having someone wash your sheets because you're pissed all over them.

You know what, then? You can bugger off if that's what you want.

I love you, and I know you're hurt.

But you're not dragging this family down with you. Fine, whatever.

I'll fuck off, then. Fair enough.

Hey, hey, hey. Tie her up, bro.

Tie her up, bro.

Hey, this is going a bit far, even by your standards, Mrs. Wheat. Yeah, well,

don't know what to do anymore.

I've got an idea, and it's got to be better than living under a bridge.

I could take him away.

To my mum's place for a while.

And how is that going to help?

Yeah, kill him or light.

No, no, no, no, no. She's really cleaned herself up. She's not a pussy anymore.

You know, going home with whatever losers she met at the pub.

She doesn't touch a drop.

She doesn't break things or smash stuff.

This is Carla we're talking about.

Yeah, my mum.

Okay. Yeah, she doesn't even eat red meat.

And she's growing her own vegetables.

Leafy ones? Big juicy heads?

Oh, proper ones, okay.

And she's into her Māori tanga with the other ladies down at the marae.

Spiritual side of things.

She's so looking after herself that if you saw her in the street today, you

wouldn't even know it was her.

Yeah? Yeah.

And getting him close to nature down the beautiful Coromandel.

Jessica can't find him there.

What do you say, Van?

You going to hook off?

Or are you going to go to the Coromandel with Munter?

Come on, buddy.

You and me, we take a road trip.

Have you got enough clean clothes for him?

Clothes, yes, clean. I don't know, like, I'm going to sniff them. Can I go now?

No.

We've said goodbye and good luck and all that.

Mum, it's just a coromandel, not some prison fart. Can you go and see what's

keeping Manta? We know what's keeping Manta.

Ugh, fine.

I'm not jealous.

We've been together for the same.

I'm so jealous.

I'm not jealous.

I'm not jealous.

and we say goodbye.

We already did that while you were on the side rooting Casey.

Goodbye to the beard dude.

Because once we get there, there's no more alcohol. You've got to be cool with

that.

See you later, you follow?

See you baby.

Oh, that kind of walk.

I don't need to know that.

And if anyone asks you what they're doing in the back of the truck, just

don't know how they got there.

Mr. Wayne.

Hey, Filani.

Go, go, go, go.

So, you've come to pay me the money you owe me from Paul.

No, it's about the job.

I sensed your interest yesterday.

What's the job, Filani? Well, it's kind of security consultant.

Uh -huh. Yeah.

I have a little problem.

Someone's been stealing from me.

Well, isn't that ironic?

You want to check that Alanis Morissette attitude at the door? Hey, Mr. Wayne

Morissette, Mr. Alanis Judge. All right, okay, Filani. Someone is stealing from

you. Yeah, a couple of times a month, yeah.

Someone whips in here and nicks off with the flu.

Well, a hundred, but... Well, and that's it.

Well, it's hard to tell, eh?

A bit overstocked, but... Well, where do you keep the float?

In the till.

Do you keep the float in the till overnight?

Yeah. Well, here's an idea. Why don't you stick it in a safe? Well, here's an

idea. I would, but Eric took it with him.

Do they bust the till?

No, the lock's broken.

Jesus, Filani.

Take the money home with you.

Mrs. Falani can smell money a mile off, man. It wouldn't like 20 minutes.

Who else has access to the building?

Oh, no one.

Only my nephew.

Ta -da!

No.

That couldn't be him.

Why not?

Because it's like I told you.

He's an idiot!

All right, Falani, I'll draw up some security plans and make recommendations

about surveillance. Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Oh, horsey.

That sounds like money walking out the door.

No, someone taking it from your till is money walking out the door.

But that's why I have you.

I can't believe I'm actually thinking about it. Get Filani to get his finger

of his arse and into his pocket and buy some bloody security cameras.

Ah, I tried that. Filani wants whoever it is caught the old -fashioned way.

Or stake out cool.

They're not actually called stakeout shit.

He wants someone... You.

To conduct a surveillance operation... On Mattel at the Galleria.

Oh, no.

I'm sorry.

God, then my life has come to this.

I think it's kind of sexy, actually.

Bullshit. Wayne Judd, P .I. Got a sitting ring to it.

Yeah, P .I. to the dodgiest P .I. in town. That's me, baby.

Oh, aren't you meant to be cleaning the answer? Oh, come on.

You need cheering up.

Smell that heat from the... I made a pun.

Baby!

Oh, Mum!

Oh, good to see you!

Gee, gee!

Hey,

Mrs. Munters, Mum.

Oh, I'm so sorry to hear about your loss, sweetheart.

Munters told me all about it.

Yeah, Mum says hi.

I hope it helps, you know, being here.

Yeah, I don't need a piss.

Ah, come on.

How you been?

Awesome.

You boys are welcome to stay as long as you like.

Cool, we'll help you with the climb, that, eh?

You'd better.

Yeah, this skinny one needs a good beating, it's fat enough.

I'll need to put him back together again, eh, bro?

Come to the right place for that.

It's a camomile tea van.

I use it for healing and tranquility.

Good honey.

Oh, I don't really drink to you.

Maybe we should rustle up their kai then, eh?

Fancy a feeder puppy.

Come on, Libra.

Come on.

It's all good, man.

If you say so.

Nah, it is, man.

How could it not be down here?

I love this time of year, bro.

Everyone's going home.

Just the locals left.

It's real peaceful, eh?

That's what a man needs to live to, bro.

Have a good one.

You coming?

Oh, I might stay down here for a bit.

Sweet as.

Suck up the pizza.

You

happy?

No, Flanny, I'm not happy.

Do you want a bucket or something?

Why do I want a bucket?

I'll pee.

I'll pee in the toilet like everybody else.

Don't abandon your post.

I'll go off.

Why wait? I'll talk to your employer.

You want a weapon? I've got a cricket bat in the office.

Go. What about Machete?

Get out.

Not today.

Yeah, scary, eh, Mum? The way he's been getting on the piss all the time, you

know? Doing all sorts of freaky shit, like he doesn't give a shit about

anything.

Bring on oblivion.

Hmm, I know that feeling.

You remember that girl, Jessica Doshlick, when you talked to her at the

bottle? That Libby flag?

Yeah. You talked up with her again.

That's how low he's gone.

Oh.

He needs healing.

Come on.

Let's get those puppies all right.

What you got there, bro?

I met this dude on the beat.

He's packing up his place to go home. Said he had a bunch of stuff he didn't

want.

Check it out, bro.

Thanks.

Wicked, eh?

What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing bringing that shit in

my mum's house? We've been here two minutes and already you're ripping off

houses. I told you, I met a guy on the beach and... Oh, look, don't give me

crap, man.

You think just because we're here now that all of a sudden I'm stupid?

You're not bringing that inside.

Fine. I'll drink it out of you then.

Don't you get it, man?

Don't you get it's not just you?

It's okay, honey. If Van wants to drink, he's more than welcome.

I'm fine.

I'm fine.

Now come on. Kai's almost ready.

But the steak stays outside. She's vegetarian too, you know.

This is the land.

No way, you remember that. Why will I not? Because you were pretty pissed at

time, man. Hey, my little boy was in tears.

Mothers remember things like that.

And birthdays.

Sometimes.

Anyway, you weren't much help calling him loser. The loser boy.

Well, I did lose.

Hey, loser.

This is the only time I beat you at running the whole time we were at

school, man. Hey! Only because that red -headed kid tripped him up. Mark

Brumsden, he's a dentist now. Yeah, you remember, you laid into Mark's mum

something chronic, man.

Remember? Remember?

Yeah, and Miss Young had to pull you up because you don't fucking know her, man.

Hey, I'm not defending my boy.

Yeah. You know, he's in tears and you're rubbing his nose in it. You were that

girl who used to love flashing her knickers everywhere. What was her name?

Sorry Who I'm really sorry

Where'd

you

boys a special page

Hundreds and thousands.

Thanks, Mark.

When I started getting into my Taha Māori, I even thought about changing my

name. Yeah?

What to?

Moana. It means the sea.

Is that because you like seafood?

Maybe.

No.

More like sometimes I wish the sea would just wash me away.

Yeah, I like that feeling.

Hey, how's it going over there?

Pretty choice, actually.

I should have warned you. Bit of an experimental batch, eh?

Maybe I should change my name.

I like your name.

Why would you want to do that?

You'd say that wouldn't be me.

Uh -oh.

This is freaky.

He hasn't stuffed everything up.

Oh, he does.

Hey, game mouse. I've got words.

I want to say them. Get over it.

It's not that easy, eh?

Because of me, she died.

And now I'm cursed.

You're not cursed.

Yeah, I am.

You're just walking down this dark road and it feels like you're cursed.

But you're not.

You know, you're going to come through this just fine.

You're going to find her in that great big heart of yours to be strong.

Isn't it too friendly?

I have this dream and she's standing right next to me and we're just mucking

around with her.

All right, Cookie, this is your fault.

Come on, I'm getting you. You can do it. You can do it.

I'm going to open this up and I'm staring straight into it.

Sweetheart.

Oh, no.

She's got the bottle.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

No.

That's okay.

You're good like that, good old mum.

No, no, no, please. Mum, no.

Get me a glass of ale.

I'll have one with you.

Just to be social.

No.

No!

When what I do in my spare time becomes any of your bleeding business, I'll let

you know.

Cheeky old bugger.

The old bastard.

Some sort of history you didn't think to mention?

I suppose he did. He used to own the business.

Well, there you go. You got yourself a sleeping partner.

Cheeky prick.

And it was always the day before pension day.

You want me to follow up on it?

No.

She'll be right.

Oh, sort of.

You're not going to do anything I need to worry about, are you?

You worry about Ted?

Well, not normally, but he is family.

So, well.

Yeah. A bonus for a good day's work.

Bless what you owe me. The pool.

And the beers.

Always a pleasure.

There you go, baby. Roll around on that. Oh, sexy.

Tell me more where that came from.

Really? No.

So did you catch the bad man?

Oh, yeah.

Was he really bad?

Total villain. I know.

That's confidential between me and my client.

Oh.

There'll be other jobs. You know, actual jobs.

Yeah. You could always roll around on the money for a bit if you like.

Well, I wouldn't. So I'm full on his back pocket.

I have to preach the word of you tonight!

That makes us even, I reckon.

Get up. Wait.

Where's your respect, eh?

Where's your respect, man?

What the fuck is the problem?

She had stopped, man. She had stopped.

What? Stopped drinking.

Stopped getting off her face.

Stopped ending up with fucking losers because they got her pissed.

Stopped being everything I grew up with my whole fucking life.

And you walk in here like the world revolves around you and one night turn

all to shit.

You're pissed I nailed your mum. I get it.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. What'd I talk about Cheryl like that? Hey, hey. Hey,

hey. What'd I get your mum pissed and rude at? It's not my fault Carla's hot.

Nah, it's never your fault.

You shit in your nest, you come here and you shit in mine and it's still not

your fault.

Because you're the only one on the planet to shoo in your stupid curse.

Your pain and suffering.

It's all shit, man.

Okay, it's a big bitch and then you die and they nail you in a coffin and the

worms eat you.

Okay? It's the way it goes, man.

Don't man me.

Don't talk to me like I'm your friend.

I can't do this.

Do what?

If you don't know the answer to that, then you... What is that, man?

It means you and me.

It means we're done and dusted.

What? Figure it out.

Why are you breaking up with me? Yeah, because you're toxic.

I don't want you anywhere near my life.

What makes you so fucking special?

Huh?

God, piss off, man. I don't fucking need you anyway.

You loser.

Loser boy!

Nice one, bro.

You call my son a loser, you fucking c -

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