All language subtitles for LA Law s02e01 The Lung Goodbye

Fine.

Your wife is one of the biggest stars in
series television.

She must be pulling down easy 50 grand
an episode.

And she thinks she can discard you like
a piece of used Kleenex?

Forget it.

Now, what sort of work did you do before
your marriage, Mr. Saban?

Um, I was a personal trainer.

Mm -hmm. I take it that's where you two
met.

She was my best client.

She blimped up over hiatus, and I had to
get her back in shape before the start

of production.

Look, I know this is hard to believe,
but this was me.

Run up, Mr. Sacramento, 1982.

And look at me now.

I really love this woman.

For five years, I devoted my whole life
to her.

And without warning, she just dumps me.
I still can't believe it.

I deserve better.

Yeah, sorry.

Don't be.

You've been deeply hurt.

And I think, uh, two, three million
dollar settlement plus some spousal

How many?

Absolutely. Look, the feminist door
swings both ways.

And it's not as if you don't deserve it.

Oh, thank you, Mr. Baker.

Arnie. Arnie.

Look, uh, there is one other question
I'd like to ask you.

Yeah, anything.

I go to the gym.

I use the machines.

Three times a week. But I can't seem to
get any definition right here.

Well, let's have a look. Take off your
shirt.

Do you use any supplements at all?

Well, crystallized sublingual amino
acids, lots of C and E, zinc, dolomite,

acidopolis, wheatgrass, spirulina.

What about free weights?

No, just the machines.

Well, if we're going to bulk up here,
we're going to have to use free weights.

You're going to have to work these pecs
till they burn. And quite frankly, I'd

shave off all that ugly chest hair.
Ernie, I can't figure out your

Rox?

Roxanne?

Sorry.

Oh, I don't know. We spend so much time
driving. Why not have a little fun?

Like it or not, Victor, you are what you
drive. It's nonsense.

No, it isn't.

The car you drive is as personal as the
clothes you wear. Guys, I am not looking

to make a statement with my car. I just
want to get to work.

Lest we forgot, the luxury to indulge in
or turn up our noses at pricey

automobiles or other symbols of our
professional standing depends wholly on

capacity to generate fees. In which
spirit, Miss Kelsey?

Hamilton versus Archon life and
casualty. Settlement papers are being

Miss Hamilton has agreed to drop her
suit in consideration of a lump sum

of $500 ,000.

That's excellent, eh?

Perhaps it will offset the cost of
litigating O 'Brien versus Lehigh

Mr. Cusack, where do we stand?

Opening arguments were yesterday.

And how much longer may we expect this
crusade to occupy your time?

This may be a long shot, Douglas, but
cigarettes are as addictive as heroin

as deadly as poison. And if the
government won't put them out of

somebody's got to. Go get it, Mike.

How can you advocate suing a tobacco
company while you sit there eating that

poison? What are you going to do when
your arteries harden? Sue the bakery?

No one ever died from eating a jelly
donut, Ann. So far.

It's with you.

For future reference, Michael, in view
of the most recent appellate court

decisions, I fail to see the point of
pursuing this type of long -shot

litigation. The point is that my mother
smoked two packs of cigarettes a day for

40 years and finally died of lung
cancer. That's the point, Douglas.

Douglas, why don't we move on to another
item?

Arnold!

Sapin versus Miller. Yeah. As you may
have read in the tabloids, Jocelyn

dumped her husband last month, but we're
seeking to set aside the prenup and get

him some spousal support.

You're telling us that a healthy guy in
his 30s is going to have trouble

supporting himself.

Mr. Sapin set aside a successful career
to become a full -time homemaker.

How does that differ from women who've
done the same in the service of their

high -powered husbands?

Sounds like a truly liberated man to me.

Sounds to me like a cheap gigolo looking
to extend a free ride on the gravy

train. That's it.

I'm out of here.

Lastly, on an administrative note, after
battling for two weeks with building

management, I've finally secured parking
for our new... for our new associates.

Hence, beginning tomorrow, Mr. Gianelli
and Miss Kleinberg may park on lower

level C.

Head in only.

Well, as that seems to conclude our
agenda, shall we adjourn?

I found that extremely embarrassing,
Stuart. Oh, you found that embarrassing?

Really? I say black and you say white. I
say tomato and you say tomato.

You found that embarrassing.

Look, ever since we decided against this
quickie wedding approach... You have

been racing around like you were
planning a coronation.

Hey, you're the one who always dreamed
about having a wedding at the Bel Air

Hotel, honey, not me.

Well, then why don't you let me handle
it, Stuart?

Instead of doing what you always do,
which is to take over everything.

every time I bring up anything to do
with the wedding, you pick a fight. Ha!

And you want me to read your mind. And
when I can't, or pardon me, you change

it, I'm left holding the bag.

Stuart, whatever you want, just let me
know.

That's what I'm talking about. You're
doing it again.

All right.

What do you want me to do?

I want us to see a therapist.

Somebody with an objective point of view
and somebody who can help us sort

through some obviously complicated stuff
here.

That's not my style, Stuart.

You afraid?

No.

I just believe in working out my own
problems.

Besides, where would we even look for
one?

I've compiled a list.

I did a little research, Ann.

Typical Markowitz.

First you figure out what's wrong
between us, then you decide how to fix

Where do I fit in? Right here.

You're going to take half the list, and
I'm going to take half the list. If you

want to find some names of your own, be
my guest.

I'm just going to deal with it.

Fine. Fine.

This one's nice.

What are we looking at in terms of
budget?

I just want basic transportation.

I could do that. I could put you in
something very cheap.

Remember to change the oil every 5 ,000
miles. You'll probably never have a

problem. That sounds great.

Sounds great. I just happen to have a
different philosophy.

Which is? I don't believe in
depreciating assets in an inflationary

The minute you hit the streets in that
so -called cheap car, it drops 30 % in

value. After four years, it depreciates
80%. To me, if

you want true value, you go top of the
line.

This, Mr. Cifuentes, is top of the line.

This is a $52 ,000 car.

It's a $52 ,000 investment.

Four years out, you'll have an option to
buy it. And it's still going to yield

85 % of its value on receipt.

I've got to admit, it's really
comfortable.

I can put you in this car today.

It's loaded.

Top of the line. Chrome wheels.

Custom sound system.

Believe me.

Six months from now, you don't like it,
I'll have a line stretching to the

sidewalk, waiting to take it off your
hand.

Would you like to drive it?

Mr.

O 'Brien, would you state your age and
occupation, please?

Forty -six.

Construction foreman.

Until I had to stop three years ago.

What have you been doing since then?

In and out of hospitals.

When I'm home, with this.

I'm not good for much but lying down and
watching the TV.

Mr. O 'Brien, are you in pain?

I have to say, it's real bad.

Like I'm choking.

It keeps getting worse.

Did you ever smoke cigarettes, Mr. O
'Brien?

Two, three packs a day since I was 16
years old. Do you still smoke

Four years ago.

I had started having trouble breathing.

The doctor said I had emphysema.

That if I didn't stop smoking, I was
going to die.

And so you stopped right then? I went to
one of those classes and stopped for a

while. But I ended up starting again.

My breathing got worse and worse.

Finally, I got so scared that I

just quit cold.

And did your health improve after that?

No. I just kept getting sicker.

Thank you.

Nothing further at this time.

Mr. O 'Brien, were you ever aware of the
controversy about the health effects of

smoking? Not when I started.

Just my mother saying it would stunt my
growth.

That kind of thing. But you did know in
recent years that some medical groups

believe there are risks associated with
smoking.

Yes. And you were aware of the warnings
carried on cigarette packages?

Yes. Did anyone ever force you to smoke,
Mr. O 'Brien? No. Did anyone ever try

to convince you to quit smoking?

My wife did. Yet you chose to smoke
anyway, because you wanted to, because

enjoyed it, is that right?

I knew it was going to kill me.

I quit.

Really?

Is this a picture of you sitting outside
this courtroom yesterday morning?

Yes. Is that a lit cigarette in your
mouth?

Yes. So if actions speak louder than
words, what this says to me is you're

kind of guy who does exactly what he
wants, no matter what the doctors or

else says.

Objection. Argumentative.

Withdraw.

I have nothing further.

Mr. O 'Brien, could you tell us how you
came to be smoking a cigarette yesterday

morning? I was waiting for the trial to
start.

I was sweating with nerves.

I had this terrible craving for smoke.

Like some kind of damn junkie.

I saw this burning butt in the ash can.

And I picked it up.

And you did this even though you'd been
warned that smoking would make your

condition worse.

I know it was stupid.

But I thought, what the hell?

Doctors give me a year tops.

Why deprive myself now?

Thank you, Mr. O 'Brien.

Your excuse, sir.

So, did this qualify as a power
breakfast?

I wouldn't know. I usually have peanut
butter on toast with my fiber.

Check, please.

I'm right away, sir.

Hey, I really appreciate you taking the
time to meet with me.

My mother always says if you want to
learn about a firm, forget asking the

partners. They'll just tell you what you
want to hear. Go to the associates.

Well, I probably sound like some kind of
corporate cheerleader.

I really love it at McKenzie Brackman.

Everybody is basically supportive.

They're very responsive to your needs.

It's not like some of those big
cutthroat firms I've heard about where

is trying to get ahead by climbing over
the dead bodies. Sounds almost too good

to be true.

Well, the pay isn't as good as some of
the bigger firms. Well, that's okay.

There are things that matter more than
money.

The quality of your life, your work.

I don't want to give you the wrong
impression.

I mean about issue cases, pro bono.

They will let you take some on.

Mackenzie particularly, but Brackman,
he's basically pretty bottom line about

billable hours.

It's no problem.

I'm looking toward a more general
practice anyway.

And it's not that I'm unconcerned about
social issues.

Black issues.

But damn it, I'm an individual first.

And the whole idea that I have to carry
some kind of banner is... I

don't sound too defensive, do I?

Believe me, I didn't mean anything.

Anyway. My interview's next Tuesday. Any
words of advice?

I think you'll knock him down.

And if I had a vote, let me get this.

You don't have a job yet.

Okay.

But only on condition that when my
employment status does change,

I can take you to dinner.

Great.

Is that Victor?

Yeah, I think so.

Let's get him.

Mr. Cifuentes.

So, this for you is basic
transportation.

This is an investment.

Long -term value instead of short -term
savings. Yeah, definitely going to make

a major dent in short -term savings.

We're talking about lifestyle investment
here, Stuart.

This car is going to attract a certain
kind of woman in droves. Second best,

Cifuentes. Probably just as well.

Gives you something to apply it to.

Victor, think about a car phone.

I've got a guy that can give you a great
deal on the new Mitsubishi.

Whoa! You're gonna put a dimple in my
door.

No,

it wasn't exactly a mutual decision.

Well, I do think he can be a little
controlling and manipulative.

My relationship with my father was fine.
Why?

No, I don't think I'm being defensive at
all.

I'm a lawyer.

He's a lawyer, too.

What do you mean I sound like a lawyer?
What's that supposed to imply?

Are you telling me that I have been on
the phone for ten minutes spilling my

guts and you don't even treat attorneys?

What?

Let me tell you something, buster. You
can use some therapy yourself.

Well, it really has a lot to do with
control, I think, you know?

No, I don't think we're looking for a
way out.

We're really looking for a way back in,
you know?

What, you don't see couples who want to
stay together?

Yeah, I heard a specialist, but... Yeah,
look, I think we should look for

somebody else, you know?

Oh, you've written a book?

Yeah, well, what's it called? I'll look
for it.

Creative uncoupling.

Thank you. Thank you very much.

I'm not exactly certain I understand our
problem.

We have here a signed, witnessed, and
notarized prenuptial agreement.

Paragraph 1.

Your client waives all right to
community property in lieu of a $25 ,000

settlement. Here is the check.

Paragraph 2.

My client retains her separate property.
Your client retains his separate

property, too, with a single -family
dwelling in Beachwood Canyon.

I wish I had to sell them at expenses.

I don't even own my place anymore.

I know. I'll take care of it.

So, since my client is in total good
faith here, and since she's starting a

in Paris in five weeks, if we could just
get these papers signed.

Afraid not.

Your client caused my client to sign
this agreement while under duress and

without sufficient knowledge of the
facts. You can forget about your 25

My client is entitled to one half of all
community property, which, according to

our preliminary investigations, puts us
somewhere in the neighborhood of two to

three million.

This is absolutely ludicrous.

Plus spousal support in the amount of $7
,500 per month.

You should be ashamed of yourself, you
big cub. For five years he spends my

money. Spend your money? I manage this.
You managed to spend it as fast as I

could make it. It's very simple, Mr.
Becker. Your clients had a nice ride at

client's expense. Now it's time he
hitched his wagon to a new star.

I resent that characterization.

And frankly, I see no purpose in
continuing this meeting.

We'll see you ladies in court.

Mark. Oh, Miss Miller?

Can I have your autograph?

Yeah, I'd love it too.

They thought they could embarrass you
into a bad settlement.

Believe me, they're going to pay the
price in court.

I have total confidence in you, honey.

I am going to need a retainer in
addition to the contingency to take this

trial.

Yeah, of course.

How much?

Ten thousand should do it.

Believe me, you'll seem very modest by
the time I've finished.

You're going to be a wealthy man.

Well, look, I have a favor to ask.

Um, if you catch this immediately, it'll
clean me out.

I'd appreciate it if you held it a day
or two until the escrow closes on my

beachwood house.

I have no problem with that.

Rock, come in a minute.

Thanks, Donnie.

Have a nice day.

Hey, we're gonna get him.

And you have a nice day, too.

Rox, take this to the bank and deposit
it immediately.

Yeah, it has a lot to do with control, I
think.

Anal retentive?

I don't know about that.

Anal retentive?

When can we see you?

Oh, look, I don't think it can wait
three months, no. Can't you shift

around?

Well... Yeah, I'm sorry, too. I'm real
sorry.

Yeah, thank you.

Thanks for your time.

I'm not grinding into a brick wall here.

I just got off the phone with a woman
who called herself a feminist therapist.

She said she has to see me alone first
to resolve my need to be exploited.

Stuart, I'm just not comfortable telling
the intimate, personal details of my

life to strangers.

Yeah, but we got to do something, Ann.
Our communication stinks.

Stuart, we're not children. We don't
have to run to Daddy every time we have

problem. That's childish, Ann. You gotta
give it a chance first before you say

no.

Fine. Fine.

Mr. Fredericks, you are the president of
the Lehigh Tobacco Company. Is that

correct? Yes, since 1967.

Your industry spends a great deal of
money on advertising, doesn't it?

Something like $2 billion a year. Is
that correct?

Well, I'm not personally familiar with
the total amount, but I wouldn't argue

with you.

Mr. Fredericks, is this one of your
company's ads?

Yes, sir. Would it be fair to say that
this ad is meant to convey that smoking

is something that young, attractive,
healthy people would enjoy, sort of like

skiing? Well, I hope so. That's what
advertising is all about, Mr. Cusack, to

get people to buy your product.

Mr. Fredericks, does your company
manufacture this brand of cigarettes?

Yes, it does.

Would you please read for the court, Mr.
Fredericks, what it says there under

Surgeon General's warning?

Smoking causes lung cancer, heart
disease, emphysema, and may complicate

pregnancy. So, contrary to your ad,
smoking isn't something that young,

people ought to do. That is, if they
want to stay healthy.

Well, the government requires us to
print those warnings on our packages,

that doesn't necessarily mean that we
believe them. So you're saying that you

dispute the conclusions of the Surgeon
General?

Well, I guess what I'm saying is that I
have a hard time believing a lot of

things the government tells me these
days.

Mr. Fredericks, do you encourage people
that you know to smoke, say, friends or

family members?

Oh, I wouldn't presume to recommend one
way or the other. I don't know what it

means to you, Mr. Cusack, but to me,
being an adult American citizen means

having the right to make your own
choices.

How about murder, Mr. Fredericks? Do you
want that right, too?

Objection. Withdraw the question.

Nothing further.

Mr. Fredericks.

How old are you? I'm 66. I'll be 67 next
month.

Are you a smoker?

I am. Two packs a day ever since I was
19.

And how is your health? Well, at my last
physical, my doctor told me I'd live to

be 100, unless I get hit by a bus first.

So you haven't experienced any ill
effects from smoking? For me, at least,

find it to be a benefit.

In what way, Mr. Frederick? It helps to
alleviate stress, which, in my opinion,

is really what's killing people these
days.

Hmm. I am so excited about Victor's new
car.

Have you seen it? It's so elegant. Such
a power state.

And he's so cute with it, too.

Sherry, it's only a car.

Oh, who's he kidding? He thinks it's
sexier than I am.

So, Mike, how's the trial going?

Well, I'm holding my own.

Do you really have to smoke?

Oh, come on, Mickey. It's only my second
one today.

It isn't going to kill me.

Not just you. It's everyone around you
that it affects.

Okay, fine.

Excuse me.

I'm going to the little girl.

Wait. I'll go with you.

I'll sleep on in there.

All right.

Does he always rag on you like that
about your smoking?

I mean, everybody's got something,
right?

I mean, I get around a man that I really
want to impress, and all I do is eat

and talk, eat and talk.

I hate it, but I can't stop myself.

Don't be silly, Sherry. You were fine.

Besides, with a figure like yours, why
worry?

Now, if I ate the dessert you just ate,
I gained five pounds.

What's your secret?

Do you really want to know?

Yeah.

You're kidding.

Hey, it's not a major problem.

I just do it when I eat too much.

I'll wait outside, okay?

Okay. See you in a sec.

Fine.

Sherry will be along in a minute.

I'm parked in the street.

I don't trust valet parking.

So why don't I get the car and meet you
guys up front?

The good news is that escrow on Mr.

Sacramento's Beachwood house closed.

Oh, great.

The bad news is that his share of the
proceeds came to $3 ,452.

Come on, Ron. He refinanced the house
and took out a second.

By the time everyone was paid off,
that's all that was left.

What about the check for $10 ,000?

Pure rubber.

Do you want to petition the court to
have a new lawyer assigned?

Oh, no.

No, look, he's a swine, Rox, but he's my
swine. And all my best instincts tell

me that there is money there. I just
have to figure out how to shake the

Rox? Mm -hmm?

How about this?

She starts shooting a movie in Paris in
five weeks, right?

If we file for an accelerated trial, it
may just be au revoir, gay Paris.

Hello, Oxnard.

Let's see if that gives us a little more
leverage.

Ann, I found the answer.

Intelligent, reasonable nose,
psychobabble. Plus, they can see us

.30. They?

It's a married therapist team.

Stuart, I'm having enough trouble with
one person. Don't you think two is

overkill? Think about it, Ann. It makes
a lot of sense.

You get the wisdom of two therapists
instead of one. Plus, they're married.

know, they know the territory
intimately.

And there's a balance. No ganging up two
against one.

Maybe we should just take this to a
jury, Stuart. That way we get the

12 opinions.

Ann, one shot, that's all I'm asking.

I'll tell them everything.

I'll tell them about how my mother never
breastfed me and about how I had a

crush on my father from the time I was
four.

You never told me about that.

Finally, Dr. Saxon, will you describe
for the court the research which you

done on the effects of smoking tobacco?

In more than two dozen experiments on
laboratory rats pumping the equivalent

three packs of cigarettes a day into
their lungs, I was never able to induce

emphysema or any other disease.

Your witness, Mr. Cusack.

Dr.

Jackson, do you agree or disagree with
the Surgeon General's conclusion that

in four smokers will die prematurely
from diseases caused by cigarettes?

I don't believe a causal relationship
between smoking and disease has been

established by anyone, including the
Surgeon General. And can you name any

reputable medical organization that
shares your view?

I don't keep lists.

What about a statistical correlation
between smoking and disease?

There's an old saying.

There are liars, damned liars, and
statisticians, which means you can make

statistics prove anything.

You don't smoke, do you, Dr. Saxon? No,
I don't. And is one reason for that

because you feel that smoking is bad for
your health?

It just never interested me.

You didn't answer my question, Dr.
Saxon.

Smoking may carry some risk.

So does breathing the air in Los
Angeles.

Every day we're exposed to all kinds of
risks from carcinogens in our

environment, and there's no way of
avoiding it unless you want to live in a

somewhere. Where do you get your funding
for your research?

The Council for Tobacco Research.

Which is funded entirely by the tobacco
companies. Isn't that true?

I believe that's essentially correct,
but that has no bearing on how I conduct

my research. I'm a scientist.

How many times have you given
depositions or testified on behalf of

companies in suits like this? I can't
say exactly.

A dozen, perhaps 15 times.

17 times exactly. Isn't that true?

You say so?

I say so.

No further questions.

At this time, Your Honor, the defense
would like to call Phyllis O 'Brien.

This is O 'Brien.

You're seeking damages in this matter
for the loss of your husband's

companionship. Is that right?

Yes. Did you ever try to convince your
husband to quit smoking?

A million times.

After the doctors told him he had
emphysema, I begged him to stop. At

time, as I understand it, he went to a
quit -smoking class and did manage to

stop for a while.

Right?

Yes. And then as soon as he did, you
walked out on him, didn't you?

Objection. Irrelevant.

Your Honor, it goes to the issue of
liabilities and damages.

Not to mention the numerous studies
indicating that stress is an important

concomitant in many diseases.

including emphysema.

I'll allow you a little more latitude.

Mrs. O 'Brien, did you or didn't you
walk out on your husband just two weeks

after he stopped smoking?

It was a hard time for both of us.

And isn't it true that you had an affair
during that period? Objection! And that

you became pregnant and had an abortion
because you weren't sure whose baby it

was? Objection, Your Honor! This is
totally irrelevant and without

Counsel approach.

Mr. Mathers, where is this going?

Still to the issues of stress,
liability, and damages, Your Honor.

If I could be allowed the indulgence of
just one last question.

One.

Mrs. O 'Brien?

Yes.

I want you to remember that you're under
oath.

Isn't it true that you left your husband
because you wanted a divorce?

And the only reason you went back was
because you figured he was going to die

soon... Objection! ...and you could make
some money off his corpse? I'd ask that

the council be sent here to be clearly
instructed... Oh, my God!

You are trying to kill him right now!
Brian, are you all right?

He needs a doctor now.

We're in recess.

Mr. Cusack, you let me know when and if
we're able to proceed?

Yes, Your Honor.

Officer Goodman?

Sergeant Wilkins?

The judge is getting real antsy back
there. Aren't you ready to go with

yet? I'm still calling witnesses, okay?

Mrs. Mallory?

Bernice Mallory?

Victor Cifuentes, witness on the Cochran
matter.

Victor, you did not have to come down. I
could have put you on call.

That's okay.

I thought it might be interesting to see
this stuff from the witness's point of

view. Great, huh?

Hey, how did this guy get busted anyway?

It was a routine traffic stop. Your
radio was in its trunk.

Can I look at the rest of the report?

Yeah.

You'll enjoy his rap sheet.

Five auto burglary priors, a couple of
GTAs.

By the way, you've seen Sherry again.

You know,

they always seem so normal when I first
meet them.

Officer Durslag?

Officer Durslag?

Officer Varian?

Oh, great.

Grace, it looks to me like there's going
to be a problem with probable cause on

the search of the trunk.

I mean, I think this guy's going to
walk.

Victor, trust me. I am not going to let
the guy who ripped you off skate out of

here. Now, believe me, I know what it's
like, even though it is just a radio.

It's like this personal violation when
it happens to you, right?

And this PD, he's brand new. He's even
more swamped than I am, and I'll just

make him an offer he can't refuse.

Excuse me.

Officer Goodman on the Rodericks 459.
Where the hell you been?

Victor, go back to work. I'll take care
of your thing. I'll call you with the

disposition.

Responsibility, ladies and gentlemen.

That's what this case really boils down
to.

These huge tobacco companies are selling
addiction, suffering, disease, death,

and they're not being held accountable.

Tragically,

Absent a miracle, there's nothing we can
do to save my client's life.

But all you can do for Mr. O 'Brien is
to compensate him for his medical bills,

his lost wages.

You could even attempt to compensate him
for the terrible pain and suffering

that he's been through. You could even
attempt to compensate his wife for all

the years that she's going to be
deprived of his company.

But there is one more very important
thing that you can do.

By awarding Mr. O 'Brien substantial
damages, you can send a powerful message

the tobacco industry that if you insist
on marketing this insidious product, be

prepared to pay dearly for that right.

To paraphrase a great American patriot,

I may not agree with a single word of
what Mr. Cusack says, but I would defend

to my death his right to say it.

And in the end, isn't that what this
case is really about?

Freedom? Those precious rights
guaranteed under the Constitution to

American citizen to express himself as
he chooses in thought, speech, and

action. You've heard a lot of
conflicting testimony here.

Maybe smoking is dangerous. Maybe it
isn't.

But if smoking is dangerous, then so is
flying an airplane or skiing down a

mountain. All of us, every day, measure
risks and make choices.

That's exactly what Mr. O 'Brien did.

Only now he's asking to have it both
ways.

He wants the freedom to do as he wants.

But he also wants someone else to take
the responsibility if he doesn't like

outcome.

as much compassion as we may feel for
Mr. O 'Brien, that does not entitle him

seek out scapegoats or financial
windfalls.

Ladies and gentlemen, in the furtherance
of your oath as jurors, I ask you to

set aside your emotions and draw that
important distinction.

Are you sure you won't join me in
Champaign? Not when I'm doing business.

I have to tell you, Miss Miller, I'm
uncomfortable being here at all.

As I told you over the phone, it's
highly unethical for me to see you

your attorney present.

I told you on the phone I fired my
attorney.

I'm representing myself.

Fair enough, but I have to warn you, my
client's been deeply wounded.

They are not the kind of wounds that are
easily healed by a settlement.

You've forced my hand with this motion
for an accelerated trial, Mr. Pick.

But there's no cliche I believe in when
it comes to cutting a deal.

A bird in the hand is worth two in the
bush.

Excuse me?

Coin of the realm, Mr. Becker.

500 ,000 cash.

In return, Dan Sapin is out of my life
forever by sundown tomorrow.

Should have been a lawyer lady.

Couldn't afford the pay cut.

Well?

I, uh, I think I can sell this to my
client.

Then have we consummated our deal, Mr.
Becker?

I believe that we have.

Good.

To us, then.

Excuse me.

I'm here about Cochran.

I think you should petition to get his
guilty plea set aside.

Cochran?

Yeah, he ripped off my car radio. You
let him cop out to a misdemeanor theft.

Now what? You think he deserves the gas
chamber?

I think he should have been dismissed.

There was no probable cause to search
the trunk of the car.

What are you, some kind of lawyer?

Yeah. I used to be a PD.

Four years.

Oh, and you think I screwed up?

No, I... Look, I know this is a tough
job. I mean, they throw you in with

piranhas when you're still real green,
but this is pretty obvious in the arrest

report. Well, when did you get to see it
anyway?

Yesterday. The D .A. showed it to me.

Yesterday? You mean you wait until I'm
totally sandbagged and then you tell me?

I think I got my priorities screwed up.

I mean, some stupid car radio meant more
to me than your client's Fourth

Amendment rights. It was only after
being up all night that I realized that

his rights get trampled on, who knows,
maybe yours and mine are next.

I did some research for you on getting
the police set aside.

I think if you can do that and get the
case dismissed, it'll make us both feel

whole lot better.

Has the jury reached a verdict?

Yes, Your Honor.

In the case of O 'Brien v.

Lehigh Tobacco, we, the jury, find in
favor of the plaintiff.

In the matter of damages, we order the
defendant to pay the plaintiff the sum

$1 ,000.

And how long do you anticipate that
appeal process taking?

However long it takes. Mr. Cusack, how
do you interpret the verdict? Maybe

later. A moment of your time? Excuse me.

All right.

I have a proposal to make.

I'm listening.

We both know how harmful it is for your
client for this precedent to remain on

the books. I have every confidence we'll
prevail on appeal, Counselor. On the

federal preemption issue alone, you're
dead.

In the circuit, maybe. Maybe not.

But I'm sure your client would prefer a
sure thing.

In consideration of Mr. O 'Brien's ill
health, we are prepared not to contest

your appeal or to pursue our own.

In consideration of?

$250 ,000, payable immediately.

No public disclosure of the terms.

I'm afraid not, Mr. Cusack.

As a matter of policy, we never settle
these cases.

And believe me, we don't lose them
either.

If your client thinks he got put through
the ringer this time, I assure you that

was just a rinse.

The heavy duty cycle's coming up.

I don't take kindly to threats.

then consider this a statement of fact
instead.

My client is prepared to litigate this
case into the 21st century and beyond,

that's what it takes.

Between you and me, Mr. Cusack, I don't
believe it will.

I just

can't stand the thought that we could be
them and there could be another couple

like us out here listening.

Well, you can't really hear what they're
saying.

What are you, deaf?

Roosevelt doesn't think I'm frigid.

Why don't you scream it a little louder?
Well, you know, if you're going to

yell, hey, this is the place to do it.

I'm Mr. Markowitz, Ms. Skelton.

I'm Dr. Robert Ingram.

And I'm afraid this is not an ideal time
to see you.

Ideal? How about lousy? Jan, stop this
right now.

Take it, you anal -retentive sociopath.

Do you know the only reason I married
him to begin with was because my mother

hated his lousy guts.

Jan, I'm going to lose my temper in a
moment. Oh, I quake with terror.

That's it.

We can't see you. We're getting a
divorce.

I wish you two the best of luck.

Sorry.

Hey, Arnie.

I brought you some arginine supplements.

We're going to build up these pecks yet.

Won't you come into my office for a
minute? Sure.

Listen, there was a problem with your
check. Oh, that.

Look, I'm sorry. The bank screwed up.
Well, it bounced again when we tried to

redeposit. Look, don't worry. Your
confidence has inspired me.

At this point, I wouldn't consider
anything less than three million.

Funny you should mention that.

I had a meeting with your wife.

She fired her attorney.

So you would go on the ropes.

Actually, she made a settlement offer. I
think it's one worth considering.

Well, it better be at least two million.

Good God, how much is that?

Half a million.

Cash.

Yeah, what do I sign?

I heard you won.

Yeah, some win.

Jerry came back with a lousy thousand
dollars in damages.

Tobacco company has all the money and
time in the world. My clients don't have

the stomach to fight to the appeal.

Come on, get up.

I'll buy you some dinner.

Grace, I really think I ought to be
alone tonight.

Well, what am I supposed to do?
Disappear until you decide I can come

I really don't feel very social tonight.

And I'm not your date.

Mickey, I know how much this meant to
you.

But under the circumstances, did you
really expect to win?

What do you say we put a hold on the
post -mortem, all right?

You're looking for a fight, aren't you?

No, I'm looking for sympathy. And if you
can't give me that, then why don't you

just leave me alone?

Why are you putting all of this on me?

You tilt at windmills, and then you beat
us both up because you lose.

Thank you for pointing out what a jerk
I've been. I really appreciate the

insight, Grace.

You're welcome.

We should have kept the appointment and
offered to reverse roll. Maybe we could

have helped them.

I'm sorry this one guy lost me. He said,
I'm sorry, Mr. Markowitz, I'm going

away on vacation to Hawaii next week. I
said, hey, no problem. We could use a

couple of weeks in the sun ourselves.
We'll join you.

He didn't get it.

I had it down to a little fat pee.

He's controlling and manipulative.

I'm distant and withholding.

Or was it vice versa?

I think I've actually figured what this
is all about for me.

It's pretty big stuff.

I was terrified to lose you.

I just... I never...

I quite believe that you chose me, so
I'm always half expecting you to leave.

The harder you try to hold on, the more
I look for excuses to pull away.

It's a perfect neurotic match.

Me too.

You know what, Markowitz?

Maybe the lesson is we just have to
paddle our own canoe.

Yeah, well, if we're going to do that, I
think we should paddle it right on up

to room 604.

I have very fond memories of room 604.

Well, I'm really glad to hear that
because I reserved it.

I'm just on the off chance that this
conversation might take this little

Controlling?

Manipulative?

I'm unthoughtful, huh?

What about prepared?