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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,840 Because these are my award -winning entry to this bake cook -off. And you're 2 00:00:04,840 --> 00:00:06,000 sure going to do well this year, Mom. 3 00:00:06,220 --> 00:00:11,320 Oh, I hope so. But you know Julianne last year, you know, her apple pie, and 4 00:00:11,320 --> 00:00:14,680 think she had something going on with Judge Christian, too. 5 00:00:15,020 --> 00:00:18,400 Well, I know Mike, and he's been working for that guy Christian for about three 6 00:00:18,400 --> 00:00:19,860 years. He's a pretty good boss. 7 00:00:20,100 --> 00:00:21,100 Yeah. 8 00:00:21,140 --> 00:00:22,140 Well, 9 00:00:22,780 --> 00:00:25,940 I think you're going to do swell, Mom. Your baking looks great. 10 00:00:26,220 --> 00:00:29,480 Yeah. I'm going to go run some errands, but I'll see you soon. Good luck. 11 00:00:29,800 --> 00:00:30,800 Get up here. 12 00:00:31,400 --> 00:00:32,400 Aw, Mom. 13 00:00:47,680 --> 00:00:48,680 Hello, Jermaine. 14 00:00:48,940 --> 00:00:50,160 Hello. Hi, Mr. May. 15 00:00:50,880 --> 00:00:52,680 You just missed Chad. 16 00:00:53,760 --> 00:00:55,800 I haven't seen Chad. 17 00:00:56,350 --> 00:00:57,810 What? 15 years almost. 18 00:00:58,190 --> 00:01:01,850 How are you? 19 00:01:02,270 --> 00:01:08,390 Good. Good to see you. All right. Another year? 20 00:01:08,890 --> 00:01:09,890 Yeah. 21 00:01:16,990 --> 00:01:21,870 Would anybody like some sweet tea? 22 00:01:22,350 --> 00:01:24,370 No, thank you. Okay, I'm good. 23 00:01:25,190 --> 00:01:26,190 Thanks, ma 'am. I'd love some. 24 00:01:30,050 --> 00:01:31,850 There you go. 25 00:01:32,070 --> 00:01:33,070 Thank you, Mr. May. 26 00:01:37,410 --> 00:01:38,410 Hello? 27 00:01:45,950 --> 00:01:46,950 What? 28 00:01:47,370 --> 00:01:48,370 Are you kidding? 29 00:01:49,230 --> 00:01:50,230 No. 30 00:01:50,250 --> 00:01:53,730 No, no, no. Don't move. No, I'll be right there. No, it's no problem. Yeah, 31 00:01:53,750 --> 00:01:54,750 yeah. Okay. 32 00:01:54,840 --> 00:01:57,800 I'll be right there. Oh, my God. All right. Thank you. 33 00:01:58,960 --> 00:02:00,500 All right. 34 00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:03,420 Everybody, listen up, listen up, listen up. 35 00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:08,500 Someone's got to tell Julianne this when she gets here. I guess when you're the 36 00:02:08,500 --> 00:02:11,800 champion, you feel like you can be late the next year, but that's okay. 37 00:02:13,040 --> 00:02:19,400 As you know, I run the large bakery in town, and there's a problem, a water 38 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:21,040 burst, and I have to be there immediately. 39 00:02:22,250 --> 00:02:25,710 I cannot judge this year's bake -off. I know I've done it five years in a row. 40 00:02:26,690 --> 00:02:31,310 This year, I'm going to have to leave it up to my trusty assistant, Michael, so 41 00:02:31,310 --> 00:02:36,330 he will take over. So someone tell Julia Ann when she gets here that Michael 42 00:02:36,330 --> 00:02:39,570 will be judging the bake -off. Michael, please come with me. Good luck to 43 00:02:39,570 --> 00:02:40,950 everybody, my friend. 44 00:02:43,090 --> 00:02:44,090 You're capable. 45 00:02:44,130 --> 00:02:47,790 You can do this. You just have to be impartial. Do you understand? 46 00:02:48,170 --> 00:02:51,190 Don't let these women try to persuade you. 47 00:02:51,500 --> 00:02:52,159 Do you understand? 48 00:02:52,160 --> 00:02:54,200 Absolutely. Impartial. Here you go. 49 00:02:54,460 --> 00:02:55,460 Good luck, son. 50 00:02:55,980 --> 00:02:57,220 You do a hell of a job. 51 00:03:03,520 --> 00:03:04,520 Ladies, 52 00:03:17,120 --> 00:03:19,800 I am here and I have brought the winning cake. 53 00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:21,040 Yes, that's right. 54 00:03:21,210 --> 00:03:22,210 Another year? 55 00:03:22,570 --> 00:03:23,570 It's all here. 56 00:03:24,390 --> 00:03:26,530 I'm sorry. Don't cry. 57 00:03:26,810 --> 00:03:27,810 Don't cry. 58 00:03:27,910 --> 00:03:29,910 Oh, we just need to do that. What? 59 00:03:30,830 --> 00:03:31,830 Oh, 60 00:03:32,290 --> 00:03:33,290 goodness. 61 00:03:33,770 --> 00:03:34,770 Don't be jealous. 62 00:03:35,050 --> 00:03:39,690 I feel anything. It's mine. 63 00:03:40,070 --> 00:03:41,070 Is that a little burnt? 64 00:03:41,190 --> 00:03:42,770 It looks a little dry. 65 00:03:43,210 --> 00:03:44,069 A little brown. 66 00:03:44,070 --> 00:03:46,190 Yeah, you all wish. 67 00:03:46,430 --> 00:03:47,430 You all wish. 68 00:03:48,010 --> 00:03:49,010 You know what? 69 00:03:53,700 --> 00:03:55,580 That sexy touch. 70 00:03:55,840 --> 00:03:58,640 He had an emergency at the bakery. 71 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:00,960 He won't be here. 72 00:04:01,300 --> 00:04:06,000 No, he will not. But we have Mike judging it here. 73 00:04:06,260 --> 00:04:07,039 Hi, Julia. 74 00:04:07,040 --> 00:04:08,620 And he's going to be impartial. 75 00:04:09,660 --> 00:04:10,660 Right. 76 00:04:11,060 --> 00:04:14,320 It's been so long since I've seen you come here. 77 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:15,539 What? 78 00:04:15,540 --> 00:04:17,000 Oh, my goodness. 79 00:04:17,959 --> 00:04:19,380 He hasn't been talking. 80 00:04:20,730 --> 00:04:23,910 How is Mia? I haven't seen her in a long time. Mia's great. She's good. 81 00:04:24,910 --> 00:04:30,210 She's carrying two carrots right now. And you just look as delectable as 82 00:04:30,950 --> 00:04:32,290 All edible. 83 00:04:32,570 --> 00:04:34,890 I'm glad she's doing well. I really liked her. 84 00:04:35,130 --> 00:04:41,710 Yeah. So, anyhow, I guess we should get this on the move. 85 00:04:42,030 --> 00:04:43,030 Yeah, let the judging begin. 86 00:04:43,330 --> 00:04:45,610 I know. Here you are. Here's your cake. 87 00:04:46,870 --> 00:04:49,190 Here's your winner. Here, please. 88 00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:54,580 No. This is definitely your winner. 89 00:04:55,660 --> 00:04:56,660 Okay. 90 00:04:57,060 --> 00:04:59,440 You know, Ashley, you know what I was thinking? 91 00:05:00,820 --> 00:05:04,720 Maybe you and I should have a talk because, you know, Ashley, there's 92 00:05:04,720 --> 00:05:07,900 that I just said to you about me. 93 00:05:08,460 --> 00:05:10,340 Just one second. 94 00:05:10,700 --> 00:05:13,140 Just one second, okay? Just one second. 95 00:05:14,390 --> 00:05:17,710 Let's have a little talk, maybe in the other room, you know, because Mia really 96 00:05:17,710 --> 00:05:19,110 has missed you an awful lot. Okay. 97 00:05:19,410 --> 00:05:22,650 Try as you can be. We just need to have a little chat. 98 00:05:23,810 --> 00:05:25,190 Okay, are we going to talk about the judging? 99 00:05:26,490 --> 00:05:32,650 Um, no, no, not exactly. You know, as far as I'm concerned, I mean, I think 100 00:05:32,650 --> 00:05:36,450 know and I know that I've already won. 101 00:05:36,870 --> 00:05:40,750 Well, I don't know. All the baked goods look really nice. 102 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:45,480 I know they do. I know they do. But I think that in the next few minutes, you 103 00:05:45,480 --> 00:05:47,760 and I are going to come to an understanding. 104 00:05:49,980 --> 00:05:50,980 Oh, Michael. 105 00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:53,100 You can't fight it. 106 00:05:53,640 --> 00:05:55,700 I'm going to give you the best blowjob you've ever had. 107 00:05:55,920 --> 00:06:00,480 Whoa, whoa, whoa. And afterwards, I'm walking away with that trophy. I don't 108 00:06:00,480 --> 00:06:04,000 know. I think I have to be impartial the whole time. 109 00:06:04,340 --> 00:06:06,280 Oh, yeah, impartial. I know. 110 00:06:07,180 --> 00:06:08,180 You can look at your cup. 111 00:06:16,849 --> 00:06:18,290 Does it stink? 112 00:06:54,090 --> 00:06:56,470 It can take you but a second to get anywhere you want to go. 113 00:06:56,790 --> 00:06:59,430 It's just too good. 114 00:07:28,460 --> 00:07:34,060 I'm a little strange just doing this. You know, being that you dated my 115 00:07:34,060 --> 00:07:35,060 and all. 116 00:07:35,180 --> 00:07:36,920 I won't tell if you don't. 117 00:08:19,280 --> 00:08:20,280 Aren't we? 118 00:08:20,580 --> 00:08:22,840 This is bullshit. 119 00:08:23,200 --> 00:08:25,080 Well, you don't like the idea of number two? 120 00:08:25,300 --> 00:08:27,240 You guys can all grab it. Who's going to get that? 121 00:08:29,340 --> 00:08:32,120 It's not going to have any effect on my judging, I promise. 122 00:08:32,440 --> 00:08:33,440 Oh, that's right. 123 00:08:33,940 --> 00:08:38,440 You know, ladies, if we can't beat her, we might as well join her. 124 00:08:39,980 --> 00:08:41,840 Sick, but I like it. 125 00:08:42,380 --> 00:08:44,120 Oh, you're getting in on this, are you? 126 00:08:44,320 --> 00:08:45,680 It's not going to affect anything. 127 00:08:46,180 --> 00:08:47,900 Oh, we'll see about that. 128 00:08:48,430 --> 00:08:50,770 We'll see about that. We'll see about the princess. 129 00:08:52,650 --> 00:08:54,450 How does the princess taste now? 130 00:09:00,770 --> 00:09:02,710 And her Oreo? 131 00:09:03,950 --> 00:09:05,470 Cupcakes? How do those taste? 132 00:09:24,970 --> 00:09:27,230 I've got a bunch of hungry wives, honestly. 133 00:09:28,890 --> 00:09:32,790 All we wanted to do was want a little bake off. Your turn. 134 00:09:33,250 --> 00:09:34,490 You're getting dessert. 135 00:09:41,290 --> 00:09:45,350 You do that pretty well, it's no wonder you won. 136 00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:07,940 Oh my 137 00:10:07,940 --> 00:10:15,620 god. 138 00:10:46,620 --> 00:10:50,340 A hungry little birdie. 139 00:11:28,660 --> 00:11:30,560 There's a lot more titties here. 140 00:11:41,790 --> 00:11:42,870 No, cuz you're gonna be there 141 00:12:22,840 --> 00:12:24,080 Somebody hold that. 142 00:13:37,450 --> 00:13:38,450 Come on, Michael. 143 00:13:39,610 --> 00:13:40,770 We'll break that party up. 144 00:14:08,400 --> 00:14:09,400 Oh, yeah. 145 00:14:09,680 --> 00:14:11,300 Oh, God, that's it. 146 00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:12,920 Fucking clowning. 147 00:14:13,260 --> 00:14:15,560 Oh, yeah. Oh, God. 148 00:14:16,360 --> 00:14:17,099 Uh -huh. 149 00:14:17,100 --> 00:14:18,079 Uh -huh. 150 00:14:18,080 --> 00:14:20,140 Uh -huh. Oh, God. 151 00:14:20,800 --> 00:14:23,100 Oh, I'm starting to see my legs. 152 00:14:23,320 --> 00:14:24,320 Ah! 153 00:14:24,640 --> 00:14:26,820 Oh, shit. 154 00:14:27,480 --> 00:14:30,140 You like that? 155 00:14:30,500 --> 00:14:31,540 You like that? 156 00:14:46,140 --> 00:14:47,980 Oh, yeah, that feels good. 157 00:15:01,960 --> 00:15:04,140 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 158 00:15:05,180 --> 00:15:06,180 Oh, 159 00:15:08,060 --> 00:15:09,240 fuck. Yeah. 160 00:15:10,180 --> 00:15:11,680 Oh, my God. 161 00:15:12,520 --> 00:15:13,580 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 162 00:15:16,740 --> 00:15:17,740 Yeah. 163 00:15:18,680 --> 00:15:19,900 Let me take that coffee. 164 00:15:20,320 --> 00:15:22,780 Let me take that coffee with you, too. Come on. 165 00:15:23,220 --> 00:15:24,219 Come on. 166 00:15:24,220 --> 00:15:25,620 Let me get that. 167 00:15:44,260 --> 00:15:45,780 I got it! I got it! 168 00:17:46,060 --> 00:17:46,799 Eat it. 169 00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:49,080 We'll give you a pineapple upside down cake. 170 00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:52,520 Oh, it's gonna get like that. 171 00:17:54,500 --> 00:17:55,500 Oh, 172 00:18:00,220 --> 00:18:01,700 fuck yeah. 173 00:20:55,350 --> 00:20:56,350 That's on the couch. 174 00:23:43,180 --> 00:23:44,180 I'm sorry. 175 00:23:44,300 --> 00:23:45,300 I'm sorry. 176 00:24:50,570 --> 00:24:51,570 um 177 00:25:23,840 --> 00:25:26,420 Oh yeah, that's it, right there, right there, right there, right there. 178 00:25:31,120 --> 00:25:32,980 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 179 00:26:19,790 --> 00:26:20,790 Oh yeah. 180 00:26:38,190 --> 00:26:39,790 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 181 00:28:23,400 --> 00:28:24,740 Fuck yeah. Fuck. 182 00:28:24,980 --> 00:28:25,980 Fuck, 183 00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:33,660 fuck, fuck, fuck. 184 00:29:08,639 --> 00:29:09,940 Okay, okay. 185 00:30:09,070 --> 00:30:10,070 Yeah. 186 00:31:14,190 --> 00:31:15,190 You need to be a lot closer. 187 00:31:20,650 --> 00:31:23,510 Do you want to put your hand on my finger? 188 00:31:26,170 --> 00:31:31,330 Do you want to feel your fucking finger fucking my ass? 189 00:31:32,030 --> 00:31:33,030 Yeah? 190 00:31:33,650 --> 00:31:34,650 That's good. 191 00:31:34,750 --> 00:31:35,970 You like that? Yeah. 192 00:31:59,280 --> 00:32:00,960 Yeah, yeah, yeah, you ready? 193 00:32:01,320 --> 00:32:02,700 You ready for it? 194 00:32:27,030 --> 00:32:28,430 Oh, 195 00:32:39,090 --> 00:32:40,230 yeah. 196 00:32:48,880 --> 00:32:50,220 My heart is still coming. 197 00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:53,360 Oh, that's fucking nice. 198 00:33:24,010 --> 00:33:27,890 Ladies, I'm sorry to say, Mr. 199 00:33:28,150 --> 00:33:29,069 May is the winner. 200 00:33:29,070 --> 00:33:30,070 What? 201 00:33:30,390 --> 00:33:31,089 I'm sorry. 202 00:33:31,090 --> 00:33:33,290 What? Are you fucking kidding me? Get him. 203 00:33:34,230 --> 00:33:35,230 Uh -uh. 204 00:33:35,310 --> 00:33:36,310 Uh -uh. Uh -uh. 205 00:33:38,370 --> 00:33:39,390 No way, man. 206 00:33:48,070 --> 00:33:48,949 Hey, mate. 207 00:33:48,950 --> 00:33:51,270 What's up, man? How you doing? You all right? What's going on, man? 208 00:33:51,660 --> 00:33:52,660 Yeah. 209 00:33:53,220 --> 00:33:55,140 So how'd the bake sale go? How'd my mom do? 210 00:33:55,640 --> 00:33:58,160 Bake sale was great. Your mom won, no problem. 211 00:33:58,560 --> 00:34:00,180 Awesome. Well, thanks very much, dude. 212 00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:04,100 Taking you to Vegas next week. My treat. All right, buddy. Have a good day, man. 13738