All language subtitles for Worzel Gummidge Down Under s01e06 Tens Heads Are Better Than One.eng

Thank you.

Oh, my

God.

We have a little story to tell you.

Rooney, for allowing Mrs. Thurston's
billy goat to scoff the label.

Is there any idea who it was intended
for? We have not.

Funny sort of name.

Woozer. We'll send something around. I'm
sure I've never come across it anywhere

before. Oh, I believe you.

I can't imagine anyone in Seatoon Lane
claim to a better dog thing like... Why

don't you open it up, Mrs., and have a
look what's inside?

Not until every avenue of identity...
Communication has been explored, Rooney.

I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll run
next door and fetch Mrs. Peacock.

nothing that comes or goes in these
parts that that woman don't know about.

Well, that proves one thing, then he
rolled up.

A cabbage ain't no good as a balancing
aid.

Surprise, surprise.

That's because it ain't got no eyes,
see.

A potato, that might do, because it's
got eyes. If I could get a potato big

enough. Now, what I really need is me
balancing aid. I don't believe you've

a balancing aid. Me neither.

Well, I have two. I've got a whole heap
of aids. I can prove it as well, once

I've got me thing sent on.

How can a scarecrow have his thing sent
on? You can.

know how to use the telephone.

Who says I don't?

Well, I does too, and I can write as
well, because I've got a writing head,

I've got a telephone in it, so I could
use them, couldn't I, for getting a

message to back home, to where I used to
come from, to get me things sent on.

And did you?

No, I didn't. Well, I couldn't, could I?

Because I hadn't got me heads with me,
and me heads is me things.

Huh. Don't you hurt me, little mister.

We has all sorts of ways of doing
things, us scarecrows has.

Us can talk to birds and beasties and
all manner of creatures.

And that's what old Wurzel's done, see.

He passed a message on to a friendly
seagull as was flying back from my... as

was flying back from his winter holidays
in Africa.

And I asked that seagull to tell me
Scarecrow friends back at Skatchbrook

was wanting me things sent on. And I
reckon they must have sent them on by

The only trouble is... What's this?

Well, I hope that no daft humans don't
go poking their long noses in where they

don't belong.

Because if they does, they'll get a
shock, I reckon.

Oh, I'm shocking enough, all right.

Is the rest of the poor man in there, or
is that all that's left of him?

Not an actually real fellow, Mrs.
Peacock.

Well, I'm glad to hear it.

It wasn't my opinion.

Somebody carved it out or something.

Who would make a thing like that?

Sort of person that didn't see fit to
stop at the one.

That's even uglier than the first.

There must be a dozen or more at least.

And somehow, they're all the thing to
look at.

Somehow, each of them's different.

I know exactly what you mean, Rooney.

They remind me of someone, but I can't
quite put a face to them. Do they ring

any bells with you at all?

They do, they do.

But I'm blessed if I can bring him to
mind, either.

Oh, doff it, the two of you.

I just want to get them out of here.

I'd give a week's wages to find out
where they were going to.

The Museum of Folk History at
Peewockawocka.

Oh, remarkable.

Remarkable.

These are among the finest examples of
primitive folk culture that it would be

my pleasure to come across.

Allow me to introduce myself. Professor
Pike, curator of the Self -Same Folk

Museum.

Oh, how fortuitous that I should chance
to call in here today of all days.

Whilst I have not the slightest idea
where these amazing pieces came from,

can be no doubt that their ultimate
destination was my museum.

Museum pieces.

But they're valuable, then.

There's no difference whether they're
worth a fortune or a farthing, Rooney.

I'm only glad to see the back of these
monstrosities.

I'll get them on the trap and off to
Piwaka Worker.

Oh, it's you lot, is it? I might have
guessed.

I suppose it were you who was giving me
that push, were it? Only for breaking

concentration, Wurzel. Well, I don't
know about that, but it dang near broke

twigs and bruised me straw.

I'd be tamed easy in the first place
using a collie as a balancing aid

you lot pushing and prodding the poor
old Wurzel and making him fall again.

That's what we're trying to tell you.
There's no need to use a cauliflower for

head. Well, how's that?

You don't know what I can lay me hands
on a big broccoli, do you?

You don't need any kind of vegetable.

You're a...

Hangman, didn't you say so? What are we
hanging around here for? Come on, let's

get... Hey, could you give us a ride to
Pee Waka Waka?

Coming. Thanks.

Pigsville.

Not bad, Pigsville, if Pigsville goes.

Youse can't come in. Why not?

Youse can't come in because I says youse
can't come in. And I says so because

I've had trouble with your sort before.

And apart from that, we're closed.

Well, we will be in a few minutes.

Well, you shoot yourself, you frosty old
face -ache.

Anyways, we don't want to go into your
mouldy old museum anyway, does we,

Titchies? Skedaddle, then. We don't want
no vagrants hanging about here.

I'll skedaddle, all right, mister, when
the other one of us comes out.

Oh, no.

Oh, no. You don't catch me with that old
trick.

You're going to tell me that there's
four of you, aren't you? And that the

one's in there, right?

That's right.

And then I tell you to nip inside and
fetch them out. And then you go and I

don't set eyes on you again.

Oh, no, oh, no.

I am not as green as I am cabbage
-looking. You stop there, and I'll go

and look for them.

Come on.

That's my intended standing.

there.

She's having a sulk, I shouldn't wonder.

She's my intended and I'm her intended.
In fact, we're both intended to each

other. One of these fine flop -a -loo
today, it's as eminent as the crow man's

going to marry us.

Both of us together and make us both a
proper pair.

What do you say to that, young Titchy?

Nothing.

Hello, Aunt Sal.

Speak to me, Aunt Sal.

Go and sulk on then, you daft ape, but
see if I care.

Happens I marry someone else.

You ain't the only turnip in the
vegetable patch, you know. Not by a long

stretch of garden, fine.

Hey, Wurzel, come and look at this.

What is it, Wurzel? Oh, this is one of
them there steamy organs, what plays

music of fairies and fates and carnivals
and such.

And there's swings which swings up and
down, and roundabouts which goes round

and round, and my Aunt Sally gets wooden
balls chucked into red, and everyone

has a rare old time of it.

How do you work it?

Well, you don't, they does.

And this here golden -headed missy woman
will be sticking around. She's the boss

in charge of all of them, you see.

My, my, my, she's a fine figure of a
missy woman, isn't she?

Yeah, I reckon she'd make someone a rare
old wife, she would.

Wouldn't mind being married to herself.

Is that my tin of eggs?

Yes.

Oh, my, my, my.

It's me eggs.

Look at that. That's an egg and a half,
that is.

What's it do?

Well, it's me thinking egg, of course.
What's it look like?

But what's it do?

What's it do? What don't it do? It knows
everything there is to know, this egg

does. Everything under the sun, I
shouldn't wonder.

It doesn't look to me as if it knows
much.

Well, that's because I ain't got it on.
Once I put it on, it starts thinking

wonderful things. And once it starts, it
doesn't stop.

Bet you it doesn't work.

Bet you it does.

What are you thinking, Weasel?

How do I know I haven't got it on yet?

I told you it doesn't work.

Yeah. My, oh, my.

I ain't seen this lot since last
Michaelmas.

Now, what have we got?

This is my Swedish circus head.

It's called a Swedish circus head
because it's made out of a tweed, not a

wortel.

And that's me magician's head.

Oh,

yeah, look at this.

You know what that is?

That's me come dancing head.

I'd forgotten I got this, eh?

I bet that one doesn't work either. I
don't think any of them do.

Oh, don't they just, Missy, know it all?

Well, I'll soon show you whether they
works or not.

It doesn't work.

Well, of course it don't work.

How's a dancer's head supposed to work
if there ain't no music for it to dance

to? You give me some music, young missy,
and I'll show you some dancing, all

right?

Look, we're going...

She

ain't come to life.

My name's Walter Ledgerow Gummidge.

Who are you when you're at home, missus?

When I am at home, Herr Gummidge, I am
in the Black Forest, which is where I am

come from.

And I am Rudy von Crotchet.

And when I am not at home, I am here
with a wunderbar steam organ.

And still I am Rudy von Crotchet, the
world's famous international...

celebrated conductress.

Come, Herr Gumich, in your arms you must
take me, and I will teach you the steps

to the time.

I'm fine, right here. I'm fine, right
here.

It's hard for you to understand when
someone is trying to talk to you. I said

excuse me.

Excuse -a -no?

Excuse -a -no for which?

And why should I be pleasing to excuse
-a -no?

Because it'll excuse me not, you
ignorant ill -bred fair -ground

What? Fair -ground ignoramus also to
you, ja?

I'm no fair -ground appendage, I'll have
you know. I was brung up at the best

possible place.

And if you'll excuse me, I would like to
take a little whirl around the floor

with my... Intended?

Aunt Sally, did you say intended?

Does that mean we're going to get
married after all?

What did you mean? I'm considering the
possibility, which means hands off as

as you're concerned to Fairground
Brickbrack. Is this the truth, Herr

Is it engaged to be married you are to
the fight show don't cough?

Ah, don't cough, you, you steam organ's
trumpet.

I'm genuine Melorabrilia, I'll have you
know.

It's true, Miss Trudy.

Aunt Sally is my intended, and I'm her
intended, too.

And right this minute, though, Aunt
Sally, old Wurzel's intending to have a

dance with Trudy Rucker.

Intending to dance, Wurzel? With her?

You must be off your chump.

You aren't seriously intending to
practice the erpsy -turpsy Korean art

woman what's been carved by gypsies and
pongs of engine oil and haxel grease.

I'll dance with whomsoever I please,
Aunt Sal.

Neither you nor nobody else is going to
stop me.

Nein, nein, Herr Gummitsch. If to this
Wormwood -rattled fraulein it is engaged

you are, then, jawohl, it is only right
that first dance with her you must.

I, Trudy von Crotchet, will conduct the
orchestra.

How awfully well bred of you.

Then you are quite ready.

I'm quite ready.

As long as I don't have bird droppings
down my jacket and cow flock on me.

A tin trunk full of heads, you say?

Naughty, ugly, brutal objects they were,
Mr. Croman.

Well, Rooney fetched them from the
station.

I did. I did that. And if I'd known
before we opened the lid what was in the

thing, I doubt if I'd have laid my hands
on it. And you might want to inquire

with Mr. Fecky where these heads are
now. The Peawucker Wucker Museum.

Although that wasn't the name that was
on the label.

put the name on the label. Ah, now,
well, Your Honour, that's difficult to

considering the Widow Thurston's new
billy goat consumed the most of it.

Funny old name it was, though.

Weevil... Wazzle something or other.

Something like that.

Wuzzle Gummidge.

That's it.

That's definitely it.

Wuzzle Gummidge. Spot on the button.

Wuzzle Gummidge.

Do you know the fella, then, sir? Ah,
no, no, no. Never heard of him.

But if I do run across the man, Rooney,
I promise you, you'll be the first to

know. Thank you, sir. Good day to you,
Mrs. Tafeki.

Where shall come it? How dare you?

Sending for heads without asking for my
permission.

If the humans discover that those heads
of yours have the power to live and

breathe, they'll uncover the secret of
the entire scarecrow race.

I'll go and rescue her, that's what I'll
do. From the travelling scarecrow

maker? You wouldn't dare.

I reckon I'll have to.

Of course, I was the one who chucked her
through the window in the first place.

So I must be the one to go and find the
travelling scarecrow maker and get Aunt

Sally back safe and sound.

Don't come.

Scarecrows don't go looking for the
scarecrow maker.

He comes looking for them.

And you know what he'll do if he catches
you, don't you?

What? I will tell you.

Tot.

Tot?

You're afraid of the treacherous
peacemaker, aren't you, Russell?

It's because I'm afraid.

I'm shivering in my boots and my straw's
standing up all along my back before

I've even started out.

Because I know what he'll do to me.

He'll chop off my arms and legs and make
me into one of his lopsided scarecrows.

And then I'll be bound to him forever
and ever. Shall we come with you,

No.

No, this ain't a place for Titchy.

Not where old Wurzels go entertained.

Then I will come with you here,
Gummidge. Be your bodyguard.

No, no, you better stay here, no.

This here's scarecrow business, and
scarecrow business only.

Don't call me scarecrow. You should have
your head examined going alone.

Well, I ain't exactly going to be alone.

Not want to have me heads with me to
help.

Set one of you, Selby.

More use than you think, young Titchy.

Oh, well.

I suppose I'd better be on my way before
it starts getting dark. Weasel, you've

left one of your heads behind.

Oh, dang me, so I have.

And double dang me, if it ain't the most
important head I'll be needing.

My God, an apple strudel. Such a fine
head I've never seen before.

That's me brave head, Miss Trudy.

So that travelling scarecrow maker
better watch out for his magic when I

this head on.

Do you think? I hope so.

Auf Wiedersehen.

Good luck.

Come on, Manu. It's getting late.

They've gone.

They were in here, but they've
disappeared.

But who could have any possible use for
them?

Come in, sir. You would have been here.

I beg your pardon?

Who did you say? I said I haven't the
faintest idea.

Yes, well, I'm afraid you've had a
wasted journey.

Although, if you are interested in fair
ground memorabilia, we do have here a

particularly fine example of a late
Victorian steam organ.

Mr. Crowman?

Just coming, Professor, just coming.

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