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Not only do I teach a little golf,
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I teaches big golf too.
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In fact, my success lies in
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that I got a style all my own.
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Just like another man that I know from Atlanta,
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whom I used to caddy for and show him all his complicated shots.
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and show him all his complicated shots.
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Look where he is now.
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Look where he is now.
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Way out yonder in Hollywood where golf is golf.
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Outside of myself,
he is the only
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champion golf player in all the world.
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You go to the clubhouse,
and register your name
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together with a small amount of change.
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Now folks, I'm here to teach you
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the rudiments of the game.
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In fact, I'm here to teach you nothing but golf.
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I sure like to play this card game.
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I've played at all kinds of cards, you know that?
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I... I... I like to play any game
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that it got some change in it, you know?
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Hey, what's your name,
anyhow, old joker?
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My name?
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My name is Biskits,
just plain old Hot Biskits.
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Now, if you know anybody that wants to play some ten-cent Coon Can
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some ten-cent Coon Can,
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send him right down the street here
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to my shinin' stand.
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'Cause I'd play anybody,
brother, just tell them
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to come down there and ask for Biskits.
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All right, I'll get somebody to play you some Coon Can.
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All right then.
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Wait a minute, folks.
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Wait a minute,
just a minute.
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I got a little surprise for you.
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You see, since I've been in your fair city,
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I've been regaled to one of the sweetest girls
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in all the world.
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Just a minute folks,
I wanna introduce her to ya.
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Just a minute,
step right up.
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I want to introduce to you,
Ms. Matilda Grine.
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Ain't she sweet,
ain't she sweet?
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Can you beat that for luck?
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Luck nothing.
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Child, you said a mouthful.
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She goes around with everyone.
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That ain't the way to spell "biscuit."
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Oh, that's the way we spell it in Atlanta.
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Bulletin
I hereby challenge Prof. Zion Williams Alias "Hot Biskits"
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to a match for the title, and a side bet of $200
James Walker
Atlanta, GA
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Why, hello there, Professor.
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I see you've got your money all ready
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for the bet, Professor.
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Well, here's mine.
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Who's gonna hold the stakes?
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What stakes?
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Our stakes, yours and mine.
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The side bet.
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- What side bet?
- I know, I know.
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- Here, here, let Mr.--
- Give me that money, here.
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When it comes to holding money,
I knows myself.
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I'll pick up some more in the morning.
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Some more of these cigars, yes,
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but, uh, is there anything else, Mr. Edwards?
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No, I guess that'll be all.
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Wait a minute there, Zion.
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There's one thing you got to be careful about.
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- What is that?
- Don't tell nobody
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that I'm the real owner of this place.
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Well then, how come?
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Because it's against police regulations.
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That's why everything's made out in your name.
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Oh, I see, yes.
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Yeah, you see I had a boy here last month.
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He was pretty good too.
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That was until he started gambling away the profits.
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- Well, where's he at now?
- Oh, I haven't seen him
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since he came out of the hospital,
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but somehow or another,
it seems that I can trust you.
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Yeah, you can trust me all right, Mr. Edwards, yes sir.
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Y... y... you can sure trust me.
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In fact, you can absolutely depend on me.
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Well, I better be getting on now.
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I am gonna check out the books tomorrow.
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Yes sir.
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- See you later.
- Y... yeah, goodbye.
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Well hello, Zion.
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Hello again.
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How's business?
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Oh, pretty good.
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So, who's gonna win the match tomorrow?
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I don't know who is,
but I know who ain't.
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- What you mean?
- Thing is, Jim,
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you know doggone well I can't beat that feller.
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You know I just kidding,
I can't play no golf
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and ain't no way in the world for me to beat that man
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unless something happens.
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Well, what's got to happen for you to beat him?
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I guess.
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Say, I got it.
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- I got it.
- Got what?
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- Come on, go with me.
- Wait a minute, going where?
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- Come on.
- Where, where do you...
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- I got it, come on.
- Got what?
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Now, is you satisfied?
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Yeah, yeah, yeah,
of course I'm satisfied.
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But what I want to know is if it'll stay in the game.
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Sure it will, all you got to do is to give me the signal,
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and I'll push this button,
that's all.
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You know, Ol' Jim,
I've got to give you credit,
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you sure know your stuff.
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And I appreciate it too.
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Don't mention it, boy.
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Sir, I appreciate this.
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Hey, Zion,
has you got $10?
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I left my pocketbook at home.
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- $10?
- Yeah.
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Man, I don't need to be searchin' myself
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'cause I know I ain't got over seven.
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Gee, he made it!
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Uh-uh, not so good.
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Nice day, ain't it?
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Oh, yes it is.
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You live around here?
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Yes.
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Doggone.
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Married?
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No, I'm not.
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You ain't?
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No.
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Got a beau?
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No, I haven't.
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My, my, my.
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What's a-matter with these boys in New Orleans?
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That's all right,
step right up.
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The money's the thing that I'm after more than anything.
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Now, 1534.
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Here's your money, Mr. Walker.
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And here's the cup.
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Thank you, thank you.
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What--what's the matter, honey?
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Is you sick or something?
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No, she ain't,
but you gonna be.
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- .. That fella.
- He did?
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Yeah, I was holding the stakes.
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- Don't blame me for that!
- Don't tell me I can't!
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Give me my money.
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I ain't got--now, wait,
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there ain't no use for--
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Hey, hey, hey, you boys can't have that racket here.
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- But, mister, this man here...
- Oh, take that on outside.
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We don't want that in here.
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Give me my money.
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But if I give you your money,
will that be all right?
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Yeah, it'd be all right if you give me my money.
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All right,
then we gon' be friends?
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Yes, we'll be friends.
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All right,
then let's shake hands on it.
11366
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