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1
00:00:06,793 --> 00:00:16,758
♪♪
2
00:00:16,793 --> 00:00:18,724
-Clear!
-Clear!
3
00:00:18,758 --> 00:00:19,758
Whoa!
4
00:00:19,793 --> 00:00:22,586
Go! Go!
Go!
5
00:00:22,620 --> 00:00:24,241
Not clear!
6
00:00:24,275 --> 00:00:26,034
Excuse me.
7
00:00:26,068 --> 00:00:29,241
Don't stop, don't stop, don't
stop, don't stop, don't stop!
8
00:00:29,275 --> 00:00:30,586
There we go!
9
00:00:30,620 --> 00:00:32,517
Looks we found our canaries
in a coal mine.
10
00:00:32,551 --> 00:00:34,137
All right, enough
of the perv committee.
11
00:00:34,172 --> 00:00:36,379
Come on, let's go.This is gonna last forever!
12
00:00:36,413 --> 00:00:37,413
-Oh, there you go!
-Aah!
13
00:00:37,448 --> 00:00:40,586
-Oh, my God! Get out!
-What the hell?!
14
00:00:40,620 --> 00:00:42,586
Carbon monoxide leak
in the building, folks.
15
00:00:42,620 --> 00:00:44,034
You need to get out.
16
00:00:44,068 --> 00:00:46,310
Okay, well, just give us
a minute so we can finish up.
17
00:00:46,344 --> 00:00:48,586
Are you crazy?
There's a gas leak.
18
00:00:48,620 --> 00:00:50,448
Okay.
Well, just let us get dressed.
19
00:00:50,482 --> 00:00:52,344
-Okay, come on.
-Come on, let's go.
20
00:00:52,379 --> 00:00:54,620
Hey, disconnect those two
and get them outside.
21
00:00:54,655 --> 00:00:56,724
Andy and I will search right,
you guys go left.
22
00:00:56,758 --> 00:00:57,724
We'll meet at the stairwell
in 10.
23
00:00:57,758 --> 00:00:59,413
And keep your mask on.
24
00:00:59,448 --> 00:01:00,931
We don't know how bad
this gas leak is.
25
00:01:00,965 --> 00:01:02,931
Copy.
26
00:01:05,068 --> 00:01:06,241
What is wrong
with you people?
27
00:01:06,275 --> 00:01:08,000
I am a first responder.
28
00:01:08,034 --> 00:01:09,103
Just one quick second.
29
00:01:09,137 --> 00:01:10,413
This only takes
one second.
30
00:01:10,448 --> 00:01:14,344
♪♪
31
00:01:14,379 --> 00:01:15,379
Hey!
32
00:01:15,413 --> 00:01:17,862
Hey, Tony, why did you
kill the music, man?
33
00:01:17,896 --> 00:01:19,689
I'm not Tony.
Tacoma FD.
34
00:01:19,724 --> 00:01:21,793
Yeah, right.
Nice outfit, dude.
35
00:01:21,827 --> 00:01:23,206
What are you guys
doing here?
36
00:01:23,241 --> 00:01:25,034
Gas bongs, brah.
37
00:01:25,068 --> 00:01:26,413
[ Bubbling ]
38
00:01:26,448 --> 00:01:28,068
Hello!
Anybody home?
39
00:01:28,103 --> 00:01:30,862
Captain!
Okay, ma'am, stay calm.
40
00:01:30,896 --> 00:01:33,034
Oh, my cat.
41
00:01:33,068 --> 00:01:37,137
My cat --
Rumpelstiltskin!
42
00:01:37,172 --> 00:01:39,068
We're gonna get you
out of here.
43
00:01:39,103 --> 00:01:41,034
Cap, Chief said
to keep our masks on.
44
00:01:41,068 --> 00:01:42,310
Do I ever do
what he tells me?
45
00:01:42,344 --> 00:01:43,931
Yeah,
but Chief's the Chief.
46
00:01:43,965 --> 00:01:45,862
And if he told you to jump off
a building, would you?
47
00:01:45,896 --> 00:01:49,172
I did last week.Just take her out.
48
00:01:49,206 --> 00:01:51,827
I'll get the cat.
49
00:01:51,862 --> 00:01:53,275
Listen to me, fireman.
50
00:01:53,310 --> 00:01:55,758
Let me just blow a little bit
of smoke in your gas hole.
51
00:01:55,793 --> 00:01:57,448
I said no!
52
00:01:57,482 --> 00:01:58,965
What the hell?!
53
00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:00,689
You know this mask
is expensive.
54
00:02:00,724 --> 00:02:03,000
Yeah, so is this.
55
00:02:03,034 --> 00:02:04,586
That's my weed, man.
56
00:02:04,620 --> 00:02:05,931
Let's go.
Get out of here.
57
00:02:05,965 --> 00:02:08,241
You're a dick.Tell it to your barber.
58
00:02:08,275 --> 00:02:09,448
Ike: Come in, Chief.
59
00:02:09,482 --> 00:02:10,758
What's up, Ike?
60
00:02:10,793 --> 00:02:12,137
It's Captain Penisi, sir.
61
00:02:12,172 --> 00:02:13,896
He took in a lot of gas.
We have to help him out.
62
00:02:13,931 --> 00:02:15,000
Where's his mask?
63
00:02:15,034 --> 00:02:16,344
He gave it
to an old lady, sir.
64
00:02:16,379 --> 00:02:17,689
Ah, come on.
65
00:02:17,724 --> 00:02:18,793
All right,
we'll clear the floor.
66
00:02:18,827 --> 00:02:20,517
You get him outside. Copy, sir.
67
00:02:20,551 --> 00:02:21,724
Out.
Idiot.
68
00:02:21,758 --> 00:02:23,000
I hope he pukes
in the parking lot.
69
00:02:23,034 --> 00:02:24,724
That'll teach him
to take his mask off.
70
00:02:24,758 --> 00:02:29,724
♪♪
71
00:02:29,758 --> 00:02:31,655
Shit, Eddie, come on.
72
00:02:31,689 --> 00:02:32,931
Eddie, I was just kidding.
73
00:02:32,965 --> 00:02:34,551
Look out, look out,
look out, look out.
74
00:02:34,586 --> 00:02:35,827
Eddie: Come on, buddy,
stay with me.
75
00:02:35,862 --> 00:02:37,413
Come on,
Rumpelstiltskin.
76
00:02:37,448 --> 00:02:38,793
Come on, don't quit on me now,
buddy.
77
00:02:38,827 --> 00:02:40,103
Stay with me.
78
00:02:43,620 --> 00:02:45,068
Hey, he's gone,
all right?
79
00:02:45,103 --> 00:02:46,068
He had nine good ones,
man.
80
00:02:46,103 --> 00:02:47,482
Let him go!
Bullshit!
81
00:02:47,517 --> 00:02:48,482
Not on my watch!
82
00:02:48,517 --> 00:02:49,793
[ Crowd gasps ]
83
00:02:49,827 --> 00:02:51,379
Stay with me here!
84
00:02:54,241 --> 00:02:55,344
[ Rumpelstiltskin meows ]
85
00:02:55,379 --> 00:02:56,931
-Ugh!
-Man!
86
00:02:56,965 --> 00:02:58,965
[ Rumpelstiltskin meows ]
87
00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:00,034
[ Applause ]
88
00:03:00,068 --> 00:03:01,896
Come on, get up.
Get up.
89
00:03:01,931 --> 00:03:03,379
I thought that was you
on the ground.
90
00:03:03,413 --> 00:03:05,517
[ Coughs ]
91
00:03:05,551 --> 00:03:06,793
You all right?
92
00:03:06,827 --> 00:03:09,241
[ Coughing ]
93
00:03:13,034 --> 00:03:14,241
It's cool.
94
00:03:14,275 --> 00:03:17,344
Furball. Furball.
95
00:03:17,379 --> 00:03:22,827
♪♪
96
00:03:22,862 --> 00:03:27,344
♪♪
97
00:03:27,379 --> 00:03:30,068
♪ Well, I'm hot blooded
98
00:03:30,103 --> 00:03:32,758
♪ Check it and see
99
00:03:32,793 --> 00:03:36,517
♪ Got a fever of 103
100
00:03:36,551 --> 00:03:38,034
♪ I'm hot blooded
101
00:03:38,068 --> 00:03:39,275
♪♪
102
00:03:41,034 --> 00:03:42,896
[ Thunder rumbling ]
103
00:03:42,931 --> 00:03:46,586
♪♪
104
00:03:46,620 --> 00:03:48,965
Yeah.
105
00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:57,000
♪♪
106
00:03:57,034 --> 00:03:58,724
Mmm!
107
00:03:58,758 --> 00:04:00,448
-Yeah.
-Yeah!
108
00:04:00,482 --> 00:04:01,482
-Baby!
-Come on!
109
00:04:01,517 --> 00:04:02,379
Son of a prick!
110
00:04:02,413 --> 00:04:03,758
Yeah, winner!
111
00:04:03,793 --> 00:04:06,068
Losers!
Yeah, whoo!
112
00:04:06,103 --> 00:04:07,586
Winner-loser what?
113
00:04:07,620 --> 00:04:09,793
I bet that you would spill sauce
on yourself on the first bite,
114
00:04:09,827 --> 00:04:11,068
and they guessed
the second.
115
00:04:11,103 --> 00:04:12,724
Thanks, Chief.What was the bet?
116
00:04:12,758 --> 00:04:14,896
Loser sleeps in a satin teddy
for a month.
117
00:04:14,931 --> 00:04:17,448
-Ooh.
-That was the bet?
You guys sound bored.
118
00:04:17,482 --> 00:04:19,655
Yeah, kind of.
We haven't had a fire in weeks.
119
00:04:19,689 --> 00:04:20,965
That's a good thing, Ike.
120
00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:23,000
You should get a hobby.I got a hobby, Chief.
121
00:04:23,034 --> 00:04:25,034
I do needlepoint.
122
00:04:25,068 --> 00:04:26,034
Eh?
123
00:04:26,068 --> 00:04:27,413
-Oh, deer.
-Let me see.
124
00:04:27,448 --> 00:04:29,965
Oh, that's super cute.Thank you.
125
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:31,586
You should knit yourself
a toupee.
126
00:04:31,620 --> 00:04:32,724
[ Laughs ]
127
00:04:32,758 --> 00:04:35,034
That's a funny joke,
but I'm not even bald, so...
128
00:04:35,068 --> 00:04:36,275
But you're starting
to bald.
129
00:04:36,310 --> 00:04:38,931
I'm starting to thin,
maybe, but no.
130
00:04:38,965 --> 00:04:41,344
So you should knit yourself
a toupee.
131
00:04:42,896 --> 00:04:45,206
I mean, it's needlepoint,
so it keeps me calm.
132
00:04:45,241 --> 00:04:46,620
-Yeah.
-Yeah, you look calm.
133
00:04:46,655 --> 00:04:48,103
Ike: Yeah, it looks like
it's calming you down.
134
00:04:48,137 --> 00:04:50,344
Don't aggravate him. There will
be hell toupee. [to pay]
135
00:04:50,379 --> 00:04:51,862
[ Laughter ]
136
00:04:51,896 --> 00:04:53,896
Maybe both of you guys
should find a hobby.
137
00:04:53,931 --> 00:04:55,103
"Hell toupee."
138
00:04:55,137 --> 00:04:57,034
Hey, why don't you guys
play cards
139
00:04:57,068 --> 00:04:58,551
or tell jokes
like the old days?
140
00:04:58,586 --> 00:05:00,103
Man,
the old days are busted.
141
00:05:00,137 --> 00:05:01,482
What?
Jokes are great.
142
00:05:01,517 --> 00:05:02,965
Come on, Andy, tell a joke.
143
00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:04,586
-Chief, I'm not good at jokes.
-You're great at jokes.
144
00:05:04,620 --> 00:05:06,448
Come here. Come on.
Let's go, up here.
145
00:05:06,482 --> 00:05:08,068
Come on.
-Andy.
146
00:05:08,103 --> 00:05:09,482
-Come on, Andy.
-Come on, get up here.
147
00:05:09,517 --> 00:05:10,758
-Do it, man.
-Come on.
148
00:05:10,793 --> 00:05:11,793
Terry: Don't be afraid
to put yourself out there.
149
00:05:11,827 --> 00:05:13,103
Okay, okay.Come on.
150
00:05:13,137 --> 00:05:15,034
Friendly room, guys.
151
00:05:15,068 --> 00:05:16,517
Come on, Andy.
152
00:05:16,551 --> 00:05:19,034
Everybody gather around.
Myawani's gonna tell a joke.
153
00:05:19,068 --> 00:05:20,931
Come on, man, come on!
154
00:05:20,965 --> 00:05:22,586
Here we go.Wait till we're seated.
155
00:05:22,620 --> 00:05:24,172
Okay.
All right.
156
00:05:24,206 --> 00:05:25,862
No opener?
157
00:05:25,896 --> 00:05:29,551
[ Thunder rumbling ]
158
00:05:29,586 --> 00:05:31,137
Let's see.
Uh...
159
00:05:31,172 --> 00:05:34,620
A pirate walks into a bar with
a ship wheel around his dick.
160
00:05:34,655 --> 00:05:37,206
[ Laughs ]
161
00:05:38,896 --> 00:05:40,068
Bartender says, uh,
"You know
162
00:05:40,103 --> 00:05:42,724
you have a ship wheel
on your dick?"
163
00:05:42,758 --> 00:05:44,275
The pirate says, "Arr!
164
00:05:44,310 --> 00:05:46,620
It drives me nuts."
165
00:05:46,655 --> 00:05:48,482
So...
166
00:05:50,068 --> 00:05:51,000
Fuck you guys.
167
00:05:51,034 --> 00:05:52,000
No, no, no.
Wait.
168
00:05:52,034 --> 00:05:53,241
Who put the ship's wheel
on his dick?
169
00:05:53,275 --> 00:05:55,068
-What?
-Who put the wheel on his dick?
170
00:05:58,103 --> 00:05:59,965
All right.
It was okay.
171
00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:01,551
Hey,
what's all this crap?
172
00:06:01,586 --> 00:06:02,655
Gifts for Cap.
173
00:06:02,689 --> 00:06:04,000
He's a celebrity.
174
00:06:04,034 --> 00:06:05,896
Ah, give me a break.[ Door opens ]
175
00:06:05,931 --> 00:06:07,413
Eddie: Hey, check it out.
176
00:06:07,448 --> 00:06:10,137
Nut Nuts Doughnuts
made me cat doughnuts.
177
00:06:10,172 --> 00:06:11,517
Oh!
Oh! Oh!
178
00:06:11,551 --> 00:06:12,724
-Nice.
-Cute.
179
00:06:12,758 --> 00:06:15,448
Siamese cat, anyone?
Hmm?
180
00:06:15,482 --> 00:06:17,758
Chiefy,
you know you want some.
181
00:06:17,793 --> 00:06:20,137
So what? You save a cat and all
of a sudden you're a star?
182
00:06:20,172 --> 00:06:21,551
Yeah, I'm a hero.
183
00:06:21,586 --> 00:06:22,517
Heroes get gifts.
184
00:06:22,551 --> 00:06:24,827
Look at this.
Cat mat.
185
00:06:24,862 --> 00:06:26,655
Shock the cat
right off your couch.
186
00:06:26,689 --> 00:06:27,862
You'd love it.
187
00:06:27,896 --> 00:06:29,551
That seems terribly cruel
and inhumane.
188
00:06:29,586 --> 00:06:31,275
Whatever.
Granny revived seven people.
189
00:06:31,310 --> 00:06:32,448
How come he's not
on the front page?
190
00:06:32,482 --> 00:06:33,862
Do I have to spell it out
for you?
191
00:06:33,896 --> 00:06:35,137
Is it because
you're black?
192
00:06:35,172 --> 00:06:36,241
No, you racist.
193
00:06:36,275 --> 00:06:37,517
Because people love cats.
194
00:06:37,551 --> 00:06:38,586
-Oh!
-Oh, yeah.
195
00:06:38,620 --> 00:06:39,413
I love cats.
196
00:06:39,448 --> 00:06:41,206
I love animals
you can eat.
197
00:06:41,241 --> 00:06:42,896
Mmm!
198
00:06:42,931 --> 00:06:43,896
Oh!
199
00:06:43,931 --> 00:06:44,965
Son of a prick!
200
00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:46,137
How many times
is that already?
201
00:06:46,172 --> 00:06:47,827
Number two.Why don't you just
slow down
202
00:06:47,862 --> 00:06:49,034
and get it
in your mouth?
203
00:06:49,068 --> 00:06:50,965
It's not a speed issue.
I got a big torso.
204
00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:52,586
Sauce naturally falls on it.
205
00:06:52,620 --> 00:06:54,620
By that logic, if we stuff
you into a girdle,
206
00:06:54,655 --> 00:06:56,000
you'll stop spilling.
207
00:06:56,034 --> 00:06:57,172
I don't want
to wear a girdle.
208
00:06:57,206 --> 00:06:58,172
-Oh!
-Chief!
209
00:06:58,206 --> 00:06:59,310
Dab it,
for God's sake.
210
00:06:59,344 --> 00:07:00,896
You're mashing it
all around.
211
00:07:00,931 --> 00:07:03,344
-Yeah, yeah.
-Come on!
212
00:07:03,379 --> 00:07:04,793
Do the whole shirt
so it's pink.
213
00:07:04,827 --> 00:07:06,034
All right, all right,
all right, all right.
214
00:07:06,068 --> 00:07:07,241
Listen up.
215
00:07:07,275 --> 00:07:09,448
Downtown finally assigned us
a new rookie.
216
00:07:09,482 --> 00:07:10,482
Probie starts today.
217
00:07:11,000 --> 00:07:12,241
Yeah! Yeah!
Yeah! Yeah!
218
00:07:12,275 --> 00:07:13,586
Come on!
219
00:07:13,620 --> 00:07:15,034
It's about time.
220
00:07:15,068 --> 00:07:16,413
I'm gonna make him go out
to that parking lot
221
00:07:16,448 --> 00:07:18,551
and kick rocks
for no good reason!
222
00:07:18,586 --> 00:07:19,724
Yeah!
223
00:07:19,758 --> 00:07:20,965
I'm gonna make him pop out
the dents in my Thermos.
224
00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:22,517
Yeah.
225
00:07:22,551 --> 00:07:25,551
Oh, man, I'm gonna make him
feel, like, so uncomfortable.
226
00:07:25,586 --> 00:07:27,965
[ Thunder rumbling ]
227
00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:29,379
Oh, man!
It's gonna be awesome!
228
00:07:29,413 --> 00:07:30,862
Okay, okay, listen.
229
00:07:30,896 --> 00:07:32,724
There are a few wrinkles
I need to talk to you about.
230
00:07:32,758 --> 00:07:33,862
-Hey, guys.
-Hey.
231
00:07:33,896 --> 00:07:36,034
-Hey, Luce, what's up?
-Hey, Dad.
232
00:07:36,068 --> 00:07:37,482
Honey, can you wait outside
for a second?
233
00:07:37,517 --> 00:07:39,344
We have some things
we got to finish up here.
234
00:07:39,379 --> 00:07:41,931
Yeah. Yeah.
For sure.
235
00:07:41,965 --> 00:07:43,413
Ooh, when the probie
gets here...[ Door closes ]
236
00:07:43,448 --> 00:07:45,758
...I'm gonna make him
renew my passport.
237
00:07:45,793 --> 00:07:48,551
Oh, oh, and we should make him
wear thigh-high boots.
238
00:07:48,586 --> 00:07:50,620
[ Laughter ]
239
00:07:50,655 --> 00:07:54,172
I'm gonna make him
call me sensei.
240
00:07:54,206 --> 00:07:56,448
Okay.
241
00:07:56,482 --> 00:07:57,931
-I like that.
-Listen.
242
00:07:57,965 --> 00:07:59,241
There will be no hazing
of the probie.
243
00:07:59,275 --> 00:08:00,793
What?
Why not, Chief?
244
00:08:00,827 --> 00:08:02,793
Because it's degrading
and it undermines unit cohesion.
245
00:08:02,827 --> 00:08:04,551
What?
You love hazing.
246
00:08:04,586 --> 00:08:05,793
I've never supported hazing.
247
00:08:05,827 --> 00:08:07,275
-What?
-Really?
248
00:08:07,310 --> 00:08:08,931
Yeah!
249
00:08:08,965 --> 00:08:10,172
-Yeah!
-How's that, buddy?
250
00:08:10,206 --> 00:08:11,310
You guys, you guys, now pull him
out of there
251
00:08:11,344 --> 00:08:12,517
and let's put his head
in the toilet!
252
00:08:12,551 --> 00:08:14,655
-I don't know, Chief.
-Oh, come on.
253
00:08:14,689 --> 00:08:16,586
You guys are too soft.
I'll do it.
254
00:08:16,620 --> 00:08:18,206
Regardless, there
will be no hazing.
255
00:08:18,241 --> 00:08:19,448
-Chief, what?
-Come on.
256
00:08:19,482 --> 00:08:20,689
-This is ridiculous!
-Whoa, whoa.
257
00:08:20,724 --> 00:08:22,517
Andy: Now
you're getting this back.
258
00:08:22,551 --> 00:08:24,000
You're kidding, right?Come on.
259
00:08:24,034 --> 00:08:25,448
Ike: Coming from you,
that's rich.
260
00:08:25,482 --> 00:08:27,103
It doesn't add up.This is the worst.
261
00:08:27,137 --> 00:08:28,448
Terry: Yeah, well,
that's how it's gonna be.
262
00:08:28,482 --> 00:08:30,034
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, wait a minute.
263
00:08:30,068 --> 00:08:33,137
Is Lucy the new probie?
264
00:08:33,172 --> 00:08:34,448
I wanted to talk
to you guys about that.
265
00:08:34,482 --> 00:08:36,000
Chief.Um...
266
00:08:36,034 --> 00:08:37,206
And you're just
telling us now?
267
00:08:37,241 --> 00:08:38,310
Don't act surprised.
You knew she was
268
00:08:38,344 --> 00:08:39,517
in the training program.
269
00:08:39,551 --> 00:08:41,620
I thought she was going
for a desk job downtown.
270
00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:42,965
Well, she wants to be
a firefighter.
271
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:44,965
Yeah, but, Chief,
she's a girl.
272
00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:46,655
Yeah, so what?
273
00:08:46,689 --> 00:08:49,034
Well, we've never had
a girl firefighter before, sir.
274
00:08:49,068 --> 00:08:51,655
There are plenty of stations
with female firemen.
275
00:08:51,689 --> 00:08:52,793
Get used to it.
276
00:08:52,827 --> 00:08:54,206
Says the biggest
chauvinist here.
277
00:08:54,241 --> 00:08:55,620
Oh, I'm a chauvinist?Yeah.
278
00:08:55,655 --> 00:08:57,172
That's ridiculous.
I have three daughters.
279
00:08:57,206 --> 00:08:59,655
But you always said that
women can't be firefighters.
280
00:08:59,689 --> 00:09:01,689
I have never said that.Unbelievable.
281
00:09:01,724 --> 00:09:03,413
Look at Seattle --
girl firefighters.
282
00:09:03,448 --> 00:09:04,620
Ha.
283
00:09:04,655 --> 00:09:06,103
What are they gonna do,
paint their trucks pink?
284
00:09:06,137 --> 00:09:07,655
[ Laughs ]
285
00:09:07,689 --> 00:09:11,379
They'll probably get lost
on the way to the fire.
286
00:09:11,413 --> 00:09:12,517
What would your mom think
about that?
287
00:09:12,551 --> 00:09:14,724
That was
a long time ago.
288
00:09:14,758 --> 00:09:15,931
That was last year.
289
00:09:15,965 --> 00:09:17,241
Andy: Plus, we only have
one bunk room.
290
00:09:17,275 --> 00:09:18,413
Where is she gonna sleep?
291
00:09:18,448 --> 00:09:19,689
In Afghanistan,
the men and women
292
00:09:19,724 --> 00:09:20,965
slept
in the same barracks.
293
00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:22,310
Yeah, well,
this isn't Afghanistan.
294
00:09:22,344 --> 00:09:23,827
You sure?
295
00:09:23,862 --> 00:09:25,620
Because it seems to me you want
your daughter to wear a burka.
296
00:09:25,655 --> 00:09:27,241
What's that supposed
to mean?
297
00:09:27,275 --> 00:09:28,655
-You don't know what a burka is?
-You can't see their face.
298
00:09:28,689 --> 00:09:29,827
-Yeah.
-Just their eyes.
299
00:09:29,862 --> 00:09:31,310
Yeah.
They're like women ninjas.
300
00:09:31,344 --> 00:09:32,344
I know what a burka is!
301
00:09:32,379 --> 00:09:33,586
Do you know
what a ninja is?
302
00:09:33,620 --> 00:09:36,034
Okay, so, what if I'm overcome
by smoke
303
00:09:36,068 --> 00:09:39,034
and I have to be carried down
three flights of stairs?
304
00:09:39,068 --> 00:09:41,724
I'm 210 pounds of pure muscle,
Chief.
305
00:09:41,758 --> 00:09:42,965
You do the math.
306
00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:44,413
Do you know
210 pounds of muscle
307
00:09:44,448 --> 00:09:46,965
weighs the same
as 210 pounds of fat, right?
308
00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:49,000
Yeah, no, everybody knows
that muscle is heavier.
309
00:09:49,034 --> 00:09:51,137
-Ah.
-What about farting?
310
00:09:51,172 --> 00:09:52,344
There will be
no more farting.
311
00:09:52,379 --> 00:09:53,724
-Oh!
-What?
312
00:09:53,758 --> 00:09:55,000
That's all I do.
313
00:09:55,034 --> 00:09:56,137
Yeah, now,
you're gonna ban farting?
314
00:09:56,172 --> 00:09:58,517
Yeah, so what?Here we go, guys, ready?
315
00:09:58,551 --> 00:10:00,172
Oh!
316
00:10:00,206 --> 00:10:01,172
[ Laughter ]That's great!
317
00:10:01,206 --> 00:10:02,758
This is what I wanted!
Whoo!
318
00:10:02,793 --> 00:10:05,206
Oh, yeah, you love farts!
319
00:10:05,241 --> 00:10:06,758
[ Farts ]
320
00:10:06,793 --> 00:10:08,413
[ Laughter ]
321
00:10:08,448 --> 00:10:09,896
You fart all the time,
Chief.
322
00:10:09,931 --> 00:10:11,620
We call your office
the Fart Hut.
323
00:10:11,655 --> 00:10:12,793
No farting.
324
00:10:12,827 --> 00:10:14,275
Whoa, Chief,
I can't stop farting.
325
00:10:14,310 --> 00:10:16,620
Do you have any idea
how gassy creatine makes me?
326
00:10:16,655 --> 00:10:18,379
Then stop using creatine.
327
00:10:18,413 --> 00:10:19,862
Fuck no, brother!
328
00:10:19,896 --> 00:10:21,172
No way!
329
00:10:21,206 --> 00:10:22,103
Yeah!
330
00:10:22,137 --> 00:10:24,172
[ All whooping ]
331
00:10:24,206 --> 00:10:25,655
And there will be
no more swearing.
332
00:10:25,689 --> 00:10:27,551
-Oh!
-[Bleep] [bleep] [bleep]
333
00:10:27,586 --> 00:10:29,275
[bleep] [bleep] [bleep]
[bleep] [bleep]
334
00:10:29,310 --> 00:10:31,172
[bleep] [bleep]
[bleep] [bleep]
335
00:10:31,206 --> 00:10:34,551
That's what we love
about this pla-- Hey!
336
00:10:34,586 --> 00:10:37,310
Lucy,
welcome to the station.
337
00:10:37,344 --> 00:10:40,551
Ugh!
Are you just telling them now?
338
00:10:40,586 --> 00:10:42,000
No.
339
00:10:42,034 --> 00:10:43,862
No, no, no, no.
340
00:10:43,896 --> 00:10:46,448
I knew this was gonna happen.
Look, I get it.
341
00:10:46,482 --> 00:10:49,137
You guys are worried that I'm
gonna bust up the sausage party.
342
00:10:49,172 --> 00:10:50,896
What?
343
00:10:50,931 --> 00:10:52,517
Stop.
This is a fire station.
344
00:10:52,551 --> 00:10:54,482
You talk about sports,
you play pranks,
345
00:10:54,517 --> 00:10:56,000
you make fun
of the bald guy.
346
00:10:56,034 --> 00:10:58,965
And Uncle Eddie talks about
how much he likes a finger
347
00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:01,068
up his ass during sex
and calls it his tingle button.
348
00:11:01,103 --> 00:11:02,068
-Whoa!
-Whoa!
349
00:11:02,103 --> 00:11:03,793
-Whoa!
-I've never heard that.
350
00:11:03,827 --> 00:11:05,034
T.M.I.
351
00:11:05,068 --> 00:11:06,206
Who told you about
the tingle button?
352
00:11:06,241 --> 00:11:07,965
It doesn't matter.
Everybody knows.
353
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:09,172
Whoa, whoa.
354
00:11:09,206 --> 00:11:11,172
I also know you guys don't think
I'm strong enough.
355
00:11:11,206 --> 00:11:12,862
-What?
-No, no.
356
00:11:12,896 --> 00:11:15,827
I guarantee at least one of you
pulled the old
357
00:11:15,862 --> 00:11:19,000
"what if she has to carry me
down a flight of stairs?"
358
00:11:19,034 --> 00:11:21,793
[ Laughs ]
No one said that.
359
00:11:21,827 --> 00:11:23,862
Regardless, I'm a part
of the team now,
360
00:11:23,896 --> 00:11:25,758
and I just want you to think
of me as one of the guys.
361
00:11:25,793 --> 00:11:28,586
Then, uh, see you
in the showers. [ Laughs ]
362
00:11:28,620 --> 00:11:30,482
[ Laughs mockingly ]
363
00:11:30,517 --> 00:11:32,310
Not if I see you first.
364
00:11:32,344 --> 00:11:33,413
What?
365
00:11:33,448 --> 00:11:34,482
All right,
everybody get to work.
366
00:11:34,517 --> 00:11:36,034
Hit the road.
Enough sitting around.
367
00:11:36,068 --> 00:11:37,620
We got things to do.
Hurry up.
368
00:11:37,655 --> 00:11:40,551
-Grats.
-Thank you.
369
00:11:40,586 --> 00:11:42,379
What the hell, Dad?
Why didn't you tell them?
370
00:11:42,413 --> 00:11:43,862
Yeah.
Why didn't you tell us?
371
00:11:43,896 --> 00:11:45,172
Why are you here?
She's my daughter.
372
00:11:45,206 --> 00:11:46,862
Yeah, and I'm her uncle
and the captain,
373
00:11:46,896 --> 00:11:48,103
and now she's on my crew.
374
00:11:48,137 --> 00:11:49,586
I got it, Uncle Eddie.
375
00:11:49,620 --> 00:11:51,551
Dad, I know you're embarrassed
that I'm joining
376
00:11:51,586 --> 00:11:53,482
your pranky
little fart club over here,
377
00:11:53,517 --> 00:11:55,620
but you have to accept it.All right.
378
00:11:55,655 --> 00:11:57,103
First, if you're gonna be
a firefighter,
379
00:11:57,137 --> 00:11:58,379
you lose the attitude.
380
00:11:58,413 --> 00:12:00,655
And you call me Chief.
381
00:12:00,689 --> 00:12:03,586
Perfect.
That's the way it should be.
382
00:12:03,620 --> 00:12:07,103
All right, now, I'm gonna go
grab my bunk, Chief.
383
00:12:07,137 --> 00:12:09,103
Mm.
384
00:12:09,137 --> 00:12:11,379
What are you doing?What?
385
00:12:11,413 --> 00:12:13,758
If you don't treat her like
a firefighter, no one else will.
386
00:12:13,793 --> 00:12:14,758
Yeah, thanks.
Why don't you just worry about
387
00:12:14,793 --> 00:12:15,862
the new rules, Captain?
388
00:12:15,896 --> 00:12:16,896
Which rules?
389
00:12:16,931 --> 00:12:17,931
The no-farting,
no-swearing rules?
390
00:12:17,965 --> 00:12:18,931
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah?
391
00:12:18,965 --> 00:12:20,862
Then go fuck yourself,
fatso.
392
00:12:20,896 --> 00:12:22,931
[ Farts ]
393
00:12:22,965 --> 00:12:24,689
That includes fight farts!
394
00:12:26,758 --> 00:12:28,103
She's a firefighter.
395
00:12:28,137 --> 00:12:30,103
You better figure out how to get
on board with that.
396
00:12:30,137 --> 00:12:32,758
[ Farts ]
397
00:12:32,793 --> 00:12:33,827
It stinks in here.
398
00:12:33,862 --> 00:12:34,965
Good.
399
00:12:37,482 --> 00:12:38,896
♪♪
400
00:12:38,931 --> 00:12:41,620
[ Thunder rumbling ]
401
00:12:41,655 --> 00:12:44,068
Son of a prick!
Every time!
402
00:12:44,103 --> 00:12:45,517
Mm!
403
00:12:45,551 --> 00:12:47,620
Who makes a cat-shaped
doughnut anyway?
404
00:12:49,482 --> 00:12:51,620
Mm, mm.
405
00:12:55,931 --> 00:12:57,758
Hmm.
406
00:12:57,793 --> 00:13:07,379
♪♪
407
00:13:07,413 --> 00:13:13,482
♪♪
408
00:13:13,517 --> 00:13:15,448
[ Sighs ]
409
00:13:15,482 --> 00:13:20,034
♪♪
410
00:13:20,068 --> 00:13:21,172
[ Grunts ]
411
00:13:21,206 --> 00:13:28,655
♪♪
412
00:13:28,689 --> 00:13:32,724
♪♪
413
00:13:32,758 --> 00:13:34,517
[ Sighs ]
414
00:13:34,551 --> 00:13:39,379
♪♪
415
00:13:39,413 --> 00:13:41,655
Oh, wow.
416
00:13:41,689 --> 00:13:44,620
Ooh, ooh.
Hey, look at this girl.
417
00:13:44,655 --> 00:13:45,620
What?
418
00:13:45,655 --> 00:13:46,862
Yeah, buddy.
419
00:13:46,896 --> 00:13:48,137
What site is this?
I'm signing up.
420
00:13:48,172 --> 00:13:50,034
Oh, no, it's for guys
with thinning hair.
421
00:13:50,068 --> 00:13:51,896
It's called Thinder.Granny: Thinder?
422
00:13:51,931 --> 00:13:53,862
I thought that was the one
with the really thin girls.
423
00:13:53,896 --> 00:13:55,413
No, that's Wafer.
424
00:13:55,448 --> 00:13:57,172
Thinder's the one that has
Jude Law as the spokesperson.
425
00:13:57,206 --> 00:13:58,655
Ooh, Jude Law?
Yeah.
426
00:13:58,689 --> 00:14:00,448
I liked him
in "Young Pope."
427
00:14:00,482 --> 00:14:02,689
Yeah.
I wish he was older.
428
00:14:02,724 --> 00:14:04,655
What if I just, like,
thinned my hair out
429
00:14:04,689 --> 00:14:05,931
and take
a profile pic like this?
430
00:14:05,965 --> 00:14:07,241
It looks like I'm balding,
like...
431
00:14:07,275 --> 00:14:08,413
Uh, no, no, no.
432
00:14:08,448 --> 00:14:10,241
They keep watch
for impost-hairs.
433
00:14:10,275 --> 00:14:12,137
Imposters?Impost-hairs.
434
00:14:12,172 --> 00:14:13,275
Who keeps watch?
435
00:14:13,310 --> 00:14:16,448
The fuzz, man.
436
00:14:16,482 --> 00:14:17,758
You messing with me?I am.
437
00:14:17,793 --> 00:14:19,724
Yeah.
Eddie: Hey.
438
00:14:19,758 --> 00:14:21,206
You guys come up
with any good hazing ideas?
439
00:14:21,241 --> 00:14:22,896
Cap,
it's the Chief's daughter.
440
00:14:22,931 --> 00:14:23,862
Yeah.
441
00:14:23,896 --> 00:14:25,103
Yeah.
She's a legacy.
442
00:14:25,137 --> 00:14:26,862
I'm a legacy, and I got hazed
relentlessly.
443
00:14:26,896 --> 00:14:29,344
Yeah, but,
Cap, she's a girl.
444
00:14:29,379 --> 00:14:31,896
That girl was an All-American
judo champ in college
445
00:14:31,931 --> 00:14:34,172
and could kick
all of our asses.
446
00:14:34,206 --> 00:14:35,724
I'd like to see her try.
447
00:14:35,758 --> 00:14:37,413
Now, let's welcome her to the
station with a friendly prank,
448
00:14:37,448 --> 00:14:39,448
and let's be creative about it.
Ike, what did we do to you?
449
00:14:39,482 --> 00:14:41,724
Covered my dick in birdseed
and hung a bird feeder off it.
450
00:14:41,758 --> 00:14:44,068
[ Laughter ]
451
00:14:44,103 --> 00:14:45,827
All right, we can't do that.
Andy, what did we do to you?
452
00:14:45,862 --> 00:14:47,482
Shaved my nuts and then
put peppermint patties
453
00:14:47,517 --> 00:14:48,448
in my underwear.
454
00:14:48,482 --> 00:14:49,448
Oh, yeah.
455
00:14:49,482 --> 00:14:50,827
-That was good.
-That was good.
456
00:14:50,862 --> 00:14:52,172
Yeah, we can't
do that one either.
457
00:14:52,206 --> 00:14:53,517
All right, Granny,
how about you?
458
00:14:53,551 --> 00:14:54,620
What did we do?Oh, you don't remember?
459
00:14:54,655 --> 00:14:56,172
You buttered
the shower floor,
460
00:14:56,206 --> 00:14:59,034
videotaped me flopping around
all greasy and naked,
461
00:14:59,068 --> 00:15:01,517
and then you sent the tape
to my brother at Camp Pendleton.
462
00:15:01,551 --> 00:15:04,413
You know how awkward it was
at Christmas?
463
00:15:04,448 --> 00:15:06,586
Seemed funny at the time.It's still funny now.
464
00:15:06,620 --> 00:15:08,103
Do we just do dick stuff?
465
00:15:08,137 --> 00:15:09,620
Yeah.
466
00:15:09,655 --> 00:15:11,586
I think we need to come up with
some equal-opportunity hazing.
467
00:15:11,620 --> 00:15:14,068
Wait, we can do
the peppermint patty thing.
468
00:15:14,103 --> 00:15:16,620
In the meantime, though,
let's do the ram-a-doodle.
469
00:15:16,655 --> 00:15:17,827
-Oh, Cap!
-Yes!
470
00:15:17,862 --> 00:15:19,034
-Come on!
-Are you kidding me?
471
00:15:19,068 --> 00:15:20,413
-Come on.
-Ram-a-doodle's great.
472
00:15:20,448 --> 00:15:21,275
What's wrong with
the ram-a-doodle?
473
00:15:21,310 --> 00:15:22,172
It's awesome.
474
00:15:22,206 --> 00:15:23,965
The ram-a-doodle's busted.
475
00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:30,275
♪♪
476
00:15:30,310 --> 00:15:36,655
♪♪
477
00:15:36,689 --> 00:15:43,000
♪♪
478
00:15:43,034 --> 00:15:45,379
Granny: Lucy!
479
00:15:45,413 --> 00:15:46,896
Lucy!
480
00:15:46,931 --> 00:15:49,172
Uh, coming!
481
00:15:49,206 --> 00:15:51,241
Hey, Luce!
482
00:15:51,275 --> 00:15:54,689
Lucy! Lucy!
483
00:15:55,965 --> 00:15:56,896
[ Door opens ]
484
00:15:56,931 --> 00:15:58,517
Lucy!
485
00:16:00,586 --> 00:16:02,034
Hey.
486
00:16:02,068 --> 00:16:03,965
Um, could you go out there
and get the ram-a-doodle?
487
00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:05,551
The ram-a-doodle?
488
00:16:05,586 --> 00:16:08,103
Yeah, yeah, it's, uh, right out
the garage and to the right.
489
00:16:08,137 --> 00:16:09,551
You'll see it.
Okay.
490
00:16:09,586 --> 00:16:10,551
It's lying right there
around the corner.
491
00:16:10,586 --> 00:16:11,655
You can't miss it.Great.
492
00:16:11,689 --> 00:16:12,896
-Today, please.
-Come on, probie.
493
00:16:12,931 --> 00:16:14,620
Oh, hey, Chief, do you mind
showing me
494
00:16:14,655 --> 00:16:16,103
where the outside
water hookup is?
495
00:16:16,137 --> 00:16:18,000
Uh, yeah, it's out here.
496
00:16:19,206 --> 00:16:23,241
No, no, no, no!
497
00:16:23,275 --> 00:16:24,689
Oh, shit!
498
00:16:24,724 --> 00:16:26,896
Myawani,
you're scraping toilets!
499
00:16:26,931 --> 00:16:29,379
Chief, th-- w-- d--
500
00:16:29,413 --> 00:16:30,482
Ugh!
501
00:16:30,517 --> 00:16:31,413
I'm sorry.
502
00:16:31,448 --> 00:16:32,827
What the hell is this?
503
00:16:32,862 --> 00:16:34,344
-The ram-a-doodle.
-I know it's the ram-a-doodle.
504
00:16:34,379 --> 00:16:35,896
I've been ram-a-doodled
a thousand times.
505
00:16:35,931 --> 00:16:37,896
A thousand one.
506
00:16:37,931 --> 00:16:39,172
I said
she was off-limits!
507
00:16:39,206 --> 00:16:40,862
Why am I off-limits?'Cause you are.
508
00:16:40,896 --> 00:16:42,448
You're off-limits.Chief, she's a rookie.
509
00:16:42,482 --> 00:16:44,068
She gets pranked, she does
grunt work,
510
00:16:44,103 --> 00:16:46,379
she gets a dumb rookie nickname
just like the rest of us.
511
00:16:46,413 --> 00:16:47,827
Thank you.
Off.
512
00:16:47,862 --> 00:16:49,517
Limits.
513
00:16:49,551 --> 00:16:51,827
[ Chuckles ]
514
00:16:51,862 --> 00:16:53,482
All right, shitface.
Good job.
515
00:16:53,517 --> 00:16:55,310
You're gonna fit
right in here.I grew up here.
516
00:16:55,344 --> 00:16:57,068
You think I don't know
what the ram-a-doodle is?
517
00:16:57,103 --> 00:16:59,344
If you're gonna come at me,
you better come correct.
518
00:16:59,379 --> 00:17:01,000
Oh, ho, ho, ho.
519
00:17:01,034 --> 00:17:02,551
It's on.
Yes.
520
00:17:02,586 --> 00:17:04,931
Awesome.
What's my dumb rookie nickname?
521
00:17:04,965 --> 00:17:06,103
That'll come in time.
522
00:17:06,137 --> 00:17:08,206
All right,
well, what was yours?
523
00:17:08,241 --> 00:17:10,931
Come on, Tingle Button.Of course.
524
00:17:10,965 --> 00:17:12,172
What was my dad's?
525
00:17:12,206 --> 00:17:13,931
No, can't.
That I'm not saying.
526
00:17:13,965 --> 00:17:15,275
-Tuna Can.
-Oh, Granny.
527
00:17:15,310 --> 00:17:17,034
-Come on, Granny.
-Why? 'Cause he likes tuna?
528
00:17:17,068 --> 00:17:18,241
Uh, sure.
529
00:17:18,275 --> 00:17:19,655
Yeah, that's it.He loves it.
530
00:17:19,689 --> 00:17:22,793
It's because his junk
is wider than it is long.
531
00:17:22,827 --> 00:17:24,551
Oh, God damn it!
532
00:17:24,586 --> 00:17:25,862
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
533
00:17:25,896 --> 00:17:26,862
That -- [ Gags ]It's gross.
534
00:17:26,896 --> 00:17:28,551
-Stop picturing it.
-Ugh. Oh.
535
00:17:28,586 --> 00:17:30,689
Oh, my God.
-Are you okay?
536
00:17:30,724 --> 00:17:31,896
Go outside if you're gonna
throw up, okay?
537
00:17:31,931 --> 00:17:33,241
Terry: Lucy!Yeah, coming.
538
00:17:33,275 --> 00:17:34,379
Granny: Don't look him
in the eyes.
539
00:17:34,413 --> 00:17:36,448
Lucy!
540
00:17:36,482 --> 00:17:39,034
Oh.
541
00:17:39,068 --> 00:17:41,241
What's the matter?Nothing.
542
00:17:41,275 --> 00:17:46,034
I'm just trying to get
something gross out of my head.
543
00:17:46,068 --> 00:17:47,724
All right, well,
I made a decision.
544
00:17:47,758 --> 00:17:50,310
I'm transferring you
to another station.
545
00:17:50,344 --> 00:17:51,517
What?
546
00:17:51,551 --> 00:17:52,827
It's better
for both of us.
547
00:17:52,862 --> 00:17:54,034
I'll get
the process started.
548
00:17:54,068 --> 00:17:57,448
♪♪
549
00:17:57,482 --> 00:17:58,551
[ Alarm blares ]
550
00:17:58,586 --> 00:18:00,482
Man: Station 24,
all units respond.
551
00:18:00,517 --> 00:18:03,620
Load it up! Possible fire in
assisted-living center.
552
00:18:03,655 --> 00:18:05,275
All units respond.
553
00:18:10,137 --> 00:18:11,862
Eddie: Here you go, Chief.
It's all set up.
554
00:18:11,896 --> 00:18:13,620
[ Sighs ]
555
00:18:14,310 --> 00:18:15,931
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
556
00:18:15,965 --> 00:18:17,344
Thank you,
Captain Penisi.
557
00:18:17,379 --> 00:18:19,482
You are a real hero.
558
00:18:19,517 --> 00:18:21,172
Aww.
Hey, let's take another one.
559
00:18:21,206 --> 00:18:22,413
Just in case.
Come on, go.
560
00:18:22,448 --> 00:18:23,413
Come on, Chief.
He doesn't mind.
561
00:18:23,448 --> 00:18:24,448
He's a monkey wrench,
this guy.
562
00:18:24,482 --> 00:18:25,586
Cheese.
563
00:18:25,620 --> 00:18:27,758
-Chief, it's all good.
-Oh, that's great.
564
00:18:27,793 --> 00:18:29,103
Someone just left
their hot plate on.
565
00:18:29,137 --> 00:18:30,206
False alarm.
566
00:18:30,241 --> 00:18:32,965
Excuse me, Chief.
We're having another...
567
00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:36,206
issue, which requires
emergency medical assistance.
568
00:18:38,206 --> 00:18:41,103
[ Man groaning ]
569
00:18:46,172 --> 00:18:49,137
Geez.
Where did he get the Viagra?
570
00:18:49,172 --> 00:18:51,000
I can't see
out my right eye.
571
00:18:51,034 --> 00:18:53,344
We're not exactly sure
where he got it.
572
00:18:53,379 --> 00:18:55,827
We assume it was bought
from another resident.
573
00:18:55,862 --> 00:18:57,241
Does he have
any Propecia?
574
00:18:57,275 --> 00:18:59,344
Andy!I'm kidding, Chief.
575
00:18:59,379 --> 00:19:01,620
I don't really need it.
I mean, that stuff is expensive,
576
00:19:01,655 --> 00:19:04,448
but it's more of, like,
preventative for me.
577
00:19:04,482 --> 00:19:06,551
You know what I mean?
Obvious-- Obviously.
578
00:19:06,586 --> 00:19:08,379
-Yeah.
-My arm is numb.
579
00:19:08,413 --> 00:19:10,206
What you're experiencing
is a priapism.
580
00:19:10,241 --> 00:19:11,931
The blood flow
to your phallic region
581
00:19:11,965 --> 00:19:13,758
is impairing
your circulation.
582
00:19:13,793 --> 00:19:15,103
How many pills you take?
583
00:19:15,137 --> 00:19:16,896
Eight.
Eight?
584
00:19:16,931 --> 00:19:18,206
Most I can handle
is four.
585
00:19:18,241 --> 00:19:19,965
I was supposed to have
a big night,
586
00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:23,482
a three-way
with Ruthie and Louise.
587
00:19:23,517 --> 00:19:24,724
Oh, Randall.
588
00:19:24,758 --> 00:19:26,655
You know Louise passed away
last week.
589
00:19:26,689 --> 00:19:28,241
That's what you think.
590
00:19:28,275 --> 00:19:29,827
Sir, we're gonna have to
take care of that
591
00:19:29,862 --> 00:19:31,655
before it causes
permanent damage.
592
00:19:31,689 --> 00:19:32,827
What's that?
593
00:19:32,862 --> 00:19:34,344
Oh, we have to aspirate
the erection.
594
00:19:34,379 --> 00:19:36,482
We draw the blood and then
we inject the member
595
00:19:36,517 --> 00:19:38,931
with epinephrine.
596
00:19:38,965 --> 00:19:40,379
What?
597
00:19:40,413 --> 00:19:43,448
Tradition is low man on the
totem pole does the job, Chief.
598
00:19:45,931 --> 00:19:48,517
I'll do it.Terry, chiefs don't
aspirate dicks.
599
00:19:48,551 --> 00:19:50,551
This one does.If it's my job, I'll do it.
600
00:19:50,586 --> 00:19:52,413
-No, you won't.
-It's rookie tradition.
601
00:19:52,448 --> 00:19:53,689
If she wasn't a woman,
602
00:19:53,724 --> 00:19:55,034
we wouldn't be having
this conversation.
603
00:19:55,068 --> 00:19:56,206
She's not a woman.
She's my daughter.
604
00:19:56,241 --> 00:19:57,827
I've seen a penis before,
Chief.
605
00:19:57,862 --> 00:19:59,931
No, you haven't!And I've touched
a penis before.
606
00:19:59,965 --> 00:20:02,413
No, you haven't!I vote for her.
607
00:20:02,448 --> 00:20:04,620
Don't touch that dick.
Don't you touch that penis!
608
00:20:04,655 --> 00:20:06,827
Now we're talking.Don't you touch that dick!
609
00:20:06,862 --> 00:20:09,310
Let go of the dick!
610
00:20:09,344 --> 00:20:10,310
You let go of the dick!
611
00:20:10,344 --> 00:20:11,275
Ooh!
612
00:20:11,310 --> 00:20:12,793
-Get off the dick!
-Chief, come on.
613
00:20:12,827 --> 00:20:14,379
-Let go!
-Let go of the dick!
614
00:20:14,413 --> 00:20:15,275
Don't talk to me
like that!
615
00:20:15,310 --> 00:20:17,000
It's not your daughter!
616
00:20:17,034 --> 00:20:19,517
Aaah!
617
00:20:24,310 --> 00:20:25,413
Anything else, Chief?
618
00:20:25,448 --> 00:20:27,034
Mm.
619
00:20:27,068 --> 00:20:28,137
Um, don't.
620
00:20:31,758 --> 00:20:37,275
♪♪
621
00:20:37,310 --> 00:20:38,689
Hey.
622
00:20:38,724 --> 00:20:40,448
Hey.
623
00:20:40,482 --> 00:20:43,689
I'm going to, uh,
I'm gonna grab a bite to eat
624
00:20:43,724 --> 00:20:46,172
and then head home.
625
00:20:46,206 --> 00:20:47,413
Cool.
626
00:20:47,448 --> 00:20:53,689
♪♪
627
00:20:53,724 --> 00:20:59,965
♪♪
628
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:02,068
[ Grunts ]
629
00:21:02,103 --> 00:21:08,034
♪♪
630
00:21:08,068 --> 00:21:09,758
[ Laughs ]
631
00:21:13,517 --> 00:21:14,827
You did a good job
today.
632
00:21:14,862 --> 00:21:16,482
You handled it like
a professional.
633
00:21:16,517 --> 00:21:18,344
Pun intended.
634
00:21:18,379 --> 00:21:20,758
What pun?
635
00:21:20,793 --> 00:21:22,517
Never mind.
636
00:21:23,551 --> 00:21:26,793
[ Grunting ] Come on.
637
00:21:26,827 --> 00:21:31,482
Hey, um, I was thinking about
what you said earlier today,
638
00:21:31,517 --> 00:21:33,034
and I think
you're right.
639
00:21:33,068 --> 00:21:37,379
I can go anywhere, and I'm just
an added stress for you.
640
00:21:37,413 --> 00:21:39,344
Uh, I was thinking
about that too.
641
00:21:39,379 --> 00:21:42,413
And, um, I don't think that
I could trust anyone else
642
00:21:42,448 --> 00:21:46,586
to teach you properly,
so you're staying.
643
00:21:46,620 --> 00:21:48,206
Really?
644
00:21:48,241 --> 00:21:50,655
You mean it?
645
00:21:50,689 --> 00:21:52,482
Yeah.
I want you here.
646
00:21:54,827 --> 00:21:58,034
Ah, come on. Ah!
647
00:21:58,068 --> 00:22:01,379
Hey, uh, you want half
of my sandwich?
648
00:22:01,413 --> 00:22:02,724
Yeah, you sure
you got enough here?
649
00:22:02,758 --> 00:22:06,310
Oh, I think so.
[ Laughs ]
650
00:22:06,344 --> 00:22:07,965
Awesome.
Thank you.
651
00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:09,000
Cheers.
652
00:22:09,034 --> 00:22:10,586
[ Laughs ]
653
00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:14,827
Both: Oh, son of a prick!
654
00:22:14,862 --> 00:22:16,310
Every time!
655
00:22:16,344 --> 00:22:19,068
Eddie: Oh, come on,
you people are savages.
656
00:22:19,103 --> 00:22:21,620
Of all the traits you inherited
from your dad,
657
00:22:21,655 --> 00:22:24,896
that one is the worst.
658
00:22:24,931 --> 00:22:27,000
Dab it,
for Christ's sake.
659
00:22:27,034 --> 00:22:28,620
What is wrong
with you people?
660
00:22:28,655 --> 00:22:30,241
Go to bed!
661
00:22:30,275 --> 00:22:32,586
I'm going.We're having a moment.
662
00:22:32,620 --> 00:22:34,448
Gonna hose you slobs down.
663
00:22:34,482 --> 00:22:36,793
Get it?
It's a firefighter joke.
664
00:22:36,827 --> 00:22:37,862
Pretty good, though,
right?
Yeah.
665
00:22:37,896 --> 00:22:39,965
Yeah.
666
00:22:42,689 --> 00:22:45,241
Free Willy. More like
let's cover these feet up.
667
00:22:45,275 --> 00:22:48,655
[ Laughs ] You know, it's
actually pronounced whh-ale.
668
00:22:48,689 --> 00:22:50,413
Did you know that?[ Door opens ]
669
00:22:52,275 --> 00:22:54,517
Oh, yeah!
670
00:22:54,551 --> 00:22:56,172
Oh, God.
So good.
671
00:22:56,206 --> 00:22:57,517
You like that,
huh?
672
00:22:57,551 --> 00:22:58,758
Yes!
I love it!
673
00:22:58,793 --> 00:23:00,655
What happened, guys?
Did you lose a bet?
674
00:23:00,689 --> 00:23:03,034
Yeah. Yeah, got to wear these
for a month.
675
00:23:03,068 --> 00:23:05,000
I don't get it.
What's the punishment?
676
00:23:05,034 --> 00:23:06,965
We have to wear
girls' clothes.
677
00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:08,620
And aren't they
comfortable?
678
00:23:08,655 --> 00:23:11,068
Actually,
it's unbelievable.
679
00:23:11,103 --> 00:23:12,310
Soft.
It's so soft.
680
00:23:12,344 --> 00:23:13,586
Yeah, it's really soft.
681
00:23:13,620 --> 00:23:15,034
See?
Girls' clothes aren't that bad.
682
00:23:15,068 --> 00:23:16,931
Not at all.
[ Laughs ] Asshole!
683
00:23:16,965 --> 00:23:18,517
Hey, man!
I hate feet.
684
00:23:18,551 --> 00:23:20,551
Hey, hey, anyway.
685
00:23:20,586 --> 00:23:22,793
Lucy, you had
a great first day today,
686
00:23:22,827 --> 00:23:24,241
and we wanted
to commemorate that
687
00:23:24,275 --> 00:23:27,034
by giving you
your official rookie nickname.
688
00:23:27,068 --> 00:23:28,655
Yes!
Yeah.
689
00:23:28,689 --> 00:23:31,965
Lucy McConky, you're officially
known as...
690
00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:32,965
Chunk Light.
691
00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:34,793
-There it is.
-Wait, wait, wait.
692
00:23:34,827 --> 00:23:36,379
Why Chunk Light?Don't get it?
693
00:23:36,413 --> 00:23:38,103
Because you come
from the Tuna Can.
694
00:23:38,137 --> 00:23:40,241
You remember, right?
Your dad's dick?
695
00:23:40,275 --> 00:23:41,482
Oh, come on.
696
00:23:41,517 --> 00:23:43,000
I just got over this.
697
00:23:43,034 --> 00:23:46,034
But, uh, we also want
to say truce.
698
00:23:46,068 --> 00:23:47,931
You know, no more pranks,
no more hazing.
699
00:23:47,965 --> 00:23:50,034
We'll just end it now,
cool?
700
00:23:50,068 --> 00:23:51,344
I think that's
a great idea.
701
00:23:51,379 --> 00:23:52,344
Cool. Truce.
702
00:23:52,379 --> 00:23:53,896
Oh, man.
Thank you.
703
00:23:53,931 --> 00:23:55,206
-Awesome.
-Awesome.
704
00:23:55,241 --> 00:23:57,620
Truce.Glad we're past that.
705
00:23:57,655 --> 00:24:00,758
That was good, though.
That was good.
706
00:24:00,793 --> 00:24:03,137
Hey, thank you, guys, so much
for making my
707
00:24:03,172 --> 00:24:04,689
first day so special.
708
00:24:04,724 --> 00:24:06,724
You kidding me?
It was a pleasure.
709
00:24:06,758 --> 00:24:08,068
Y'all are the best.
710
00:24:08,103 --> 00:24:09,310
Night, guys.
711
00:24:09,344 --> 00:24:11,000
Good night.
712
00:24:12,758 --> 00:24:15,275
[ Men screaming ][ Electricity crackles ]
713
00:24:15,310 --> 00:24:17,620
Whoa! Whoa!
Whoa!
714
00:24:17,655 --> 00:24:19,379
-Whoa! Whoa!
-[ Laughs ]
715
00:24:19,413 --> 00:24:21,000
Cat mat, bitches!
716
00:24:21,034 --> 00:24:23,896
Whoop-whoop!
[ Laughs ]
717
00:24:23,931 --> 00:24:26,206
Chief!
718
00:24:26,241 --> 00:24:27,448
Good night.
48619
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