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1
00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:05,189
Michael?
2
00:01:08,402 --> 00:01:11,404
What are you doing out here, son?
It's after midnight.
3
00:01:11,572 --> 00:01:13,072
Couldn't sleep, Pops.
4
00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:16,200
Well, neither can we,
with all that noise you're making.
5
00:01:16,368 --> 00:01:17,577
Come on, let's go inside.
6
00:01:18,203 --> 00:01:20,163
Just one more shot?
7
00:01:21,957 --> 00:01:24,167
All right. Just one.
8
00:01:24,334 --> 00:01:25,835
Yeah.
9
00:01:28,297 --> 00:01:30,798
That's good. Shoot it again.
10
00:01:34,511 --> 00:01:38,014
Getting pretty good, son.
Go ahead, shoot till you miss.
11
00:01:38,182 --> 00:01:40,516
You think if I can get good enough,
I can go to college?
12
00:01:40,684 --> 00:01:41,726
Hey...
13
00:01:43,729 --> 00:01:47,356
...if you get good enough,
you can do anything you want to, Michael.
14
00:01:48,150 --> 00:01:50,568
I want to play at North Carolina.
15
00:01:52,404 --> 00:01:54,530
That's a real fine school.
Real fine school.
16
00:01:54,698 --> 00:01:56,866
You can get a first-class education there.
17
00:01:57,034 --> 00:01:59,494
I want to play on a championship team.
18
00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:03,080
Then I want to play in the NBA.
19
00:02:05,542 --> 00:02:08,044
All right, let's slow down, son.
20
00:02:08,212 --> 00:02:10,463
Don't you think you ought
to get a little sleep first?
21
00:02:10,631 --> 00:02:12,423
- And once I've done all that...
- Uh-huh.
22
00:02:12,591 --> 00:02:14,842
...I want to play baseball,
just like you, Dad.
23
00:02:15,010 --> 00:02:17,929
Baseball. Now, that's a sport.
24
00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:22,058
And when you're finished with that,
I suppose you're gonna fly, huh?
25
00:05:55,105 --> 00:05:56,939
I just feel at this particular time...
26
00:05:57,107 --> 00:06:00,943
...that I reached the, uh, pinnacle of
my basketball career and I must retire.
27
00:06:02,279 --> 00:06:05,740
The one good thing that comes out of this
is that my father had the opportunity...
28
00:06:05,907 --> 00:06:09,577
...to see me play my last basketball game,
and that means a lot to me.
29
00:06:09,745 --> 00:06:11,454
What are you gonna do now?
30
00:06:11,621 --> 00:06:15,833
Well, I've never really told anybody this,
except for one person, and, uh...
31
00:06:16,001 --> 00:06:18,044
But I think I'm gonna go play
professional baseball.
32
00:06:19,421 --> 00:06:22,882
- What position will you play?
- I don't know. As a kid, I was a pitcher.
33
00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:27,303
I think that would be kind of hard for me
to pitch, so I'm gonna play the outfield.
34
00:07:15,852 --> 00:07:17,520
Woo-hoo!
35
00:07:19,523 --> 00:07:21,649
Let's get out of here, Dad. This stinks.
36
00:07:21,817 --> 00:07:23,776
Don't bring me here anymore, all right?
37
00:07:23,944 --> 00:07:27,238
- Don't bring me here anymore, all right?
Are you listening?
38
00:07:27,405 --> 00:07:32,201
Did you hear him? Did you hear him?
That little brat is right.
39
00:07:32,369 --> 00:07:34,703
I've told you, if I've told you once...
40
00:07:34,871 --> 00:07:39,125
...I told you a thousand, thousand,
thousand, thousand times.
41
00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:41,293
We need new attractions.
42
00:07:41,711 --> 00:07:42,711
- Right.
- New ones.
43
00:07:42,879 --> 00:07:43,921
Uh-huh.
44
00:07:44,089 --> 00:07:46,257
- Get it?
- Big, shiny new things, yeah.
45
00:07:46,424 --> 00:07:49,135
- Absolutely, sir.
- Look at me. Look at me and listen.
46
00:07:49,886 --> 00:07:51,137
The customer is always right.
47
00:07:52,514 --> 00:07:55,432
Right.
- The customer is always right.
48
00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:57,101
Exactly.
49
00:07:57,269 --> 00:07:58,811
Always.
50
00:08:00,188 --> 00:08:01,230
Right.
51
00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:03,983
- Okay, we need something...
My bad.
52
00:08:04,151 --> 00:08:05,401
We need something...
53
00:08:07,070 --> 00:08:09,196
...nutty.
- Nutty.
54
00:08:09,364 --> 00:08:11,490
- Something wacky.
Wacky.
55
00:08:11,658 --> 00:08:14,243
We need something, something...
Something... We need something...
56
00:08:14,411 --> 00:08:16,078
Looney? Oops.
57
00:08:16,246 --> 00:08:17,413
Looney. Thank you.
58
00:08:17,581 --> 00:08:18,873
Looney?
59
00:08:21,251 --> 00:08:23,669
I'm an elk. Shoot me.
60
00:08:28,216 --> 00:08:30,259
Yes. Looney. Yes.
61
00:08:30,427 --> 00:08:34,096
Now you're talking.
Looney. Looney. That's it.
62
00:08:34,264 --> 00:08:36,765
That's the word I was looking for.
Looney.
63
00:08:36,933 --> 00:08:39,185
- Get the Looney Tunes.
- Looney Tunes!
64
00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:43,105
- Bring them here.
Sir. Just noticing, sir.
65
00:08:43,273 --> 00:08:46,192
They're from Earth.
What if they can't come?
66
00:08:46,735 --> 00:08:50,070
What did you say?
What if they can't come?
67
00:08:51,489 --> 00:08:53,490
- Make them.
- Cool.
68
00:08:54,034 --> 00:08:55,534
Make them. Ha-ha-ha.
69
00:08:55,702 --> 00:08:59,413
We're gonna go get them. Yeah. All right.
70
00:09:07,964 --> 00:09:09,590
Strike!
71
00:09:12,844 --> 00:09:14,178
Looks good in that uniform.
72
00:09:14,346 --> 00:09:16,639
Looks great. Can't teach that.
73
00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:17,806
Can't teach it.
74
00:09:17,974 --> 00:09:21,143
Thanks for autographing that basketball
for my kid. I'm a hero now.
75
00:09:21,311 --> 00:09:22,853
No problem. Happy to do it, man.
76
00:09:23,021 --> 00:09:24,647
Let's go!
77
00:09:28,151 --> 00:09:30,653
Curve ball. Don't swing.
78
00:09:31,655 --> 00:09:33,656
Don't swing.
79
00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:42,498
Ball!
80
00:09:46,211 --> 00:09:48,629
Fastball, outside corner. Swing.
81
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:55,886
Strike!
82
00:09:56,054 --> 00:09:57,221
That was your pitch.
83
00:09:57,389 --> 00:09:58,681
I know, I missed it.
84
00:09:59,307 --> 00:10:01,809
Don't worry. I'll get you another one.
85
00:10:04,688 --> 00:10:07,189
Podolak. Podolak, come here.
86
00:10:07,357 --> 00:10:08,524
Sorry, I didn't mean to...
87
00:10:08,692 --> 00:10:11,318
- Come here.
- Yes, sir?
88
00:10:11,486 --> 00:10:15,572
Make sure nobody bothers Michael. I want
him to be the happiest player in the world.
89
00:10:15,740 --> 00:10:16,865
The happiest.
90
00:10:17,993 --> 00:10:20,327
Slider. Don't swing.
91
00:10:25,375 --> 00:10:26,750
Strike three!
92
00:10:26,918 --> 00:10:28,043
I told you not to swing.
93
00:10:28,211 --> 00:10:29,336
I couldn't help it.
94
00:10:29,504 --> 00:10:31,672
I understand. Hey, nice talking to you.
95
00:10:39,681 --> 00:10:41,557
We're not worried. We're not worried.
96
00:10:45,145 --> 00:10:47,646
Good job, Mike.
Good hustle.
97
00:10:47,814 --> 00:10:49,189
Good cut, Michael. Good cut.
98
00:10:49,357 --> 00:10:52,234
That was a strikeout, Mike?
Good-looking strikeout. Real good.
99
00:10:52,402 --> 00:10:55,571
You look good when you strike out.
When I strike out, it looks nasty, man.
100
00:10:55,739 --> 00:10:58,073
At least you look good, man.
Good-looking.
101
00:10:59,451 --> 00:11:00,909
Hi, Mr. Jordan.
102
00:11:01,745 --> 00:11:03,662
Mr. Jordan, I'm Stan Podolak...
103
00:11:07,876 --> 00:11:10,502
Oh, jeez.
104
00:11:13,631 --> 00:11:17,426
- You all right? That was a nasty fall.
- Yeah.
105
00:11:17,594 --> 00:11:21,889
Oh. I'm Stan Podolak, Mr. Jordan.
I'm the Barons' new publicist.
106
00:11:23,058 --> 00:11:26,435
I'm here to make your life easier.
Want me to drive you somewhere?
107
00:11:26,603 --> 00:11:29,980
Want me to pick up your laundry,
babysit your kids? I will do it.
108
00:11:30,148 --> 00:11:35,778
I am here to personally guarantee
that no one will ever bother you.
109
00:11:45,038 --> 00:11:46,080
What was that?
110
00:11:51,461 --> 00:11:52,503
Hang on.
111
00:11:52,670 --> 00:11:55,672
- Hanging on.
- Hanging on.
112
00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:57,883
BLANKO:
Are we there yet?
113
00:12:06,142 --> 00:12:07,643
- Bombastic.
- Cool.
114
00:12:18,947 --> 00:12:20,948
All right, you irascible bunny.
115
00:12:21,116 --> 00:12:23,325
Come back here, you screwy rodent.
116
00:12:23,493 --> 00:12:27,996
I'll, uh, be with you in a second, folks,
after I finish with nature boy here.
117
00:12:28,164 --> 00:12:31,834
All right, you pesky rabbit.
I've got you now.
118
00:12:33,837 --> 00:12:35,421
Ouch!
119
00:12:36,005 --> 00:12:37,047
Hmm.
120
00:12:39,676 --> 00:12:42,928
One small step for moi...
121
00:12:43,096 --> 00:12:45,931
One giant leap for Moron Mountain.
122
00:12:48,184 --> 00:12:50,561
And one whopper headache for
Elmer Fudd.
123
00:12:55,191 --> 00:12:57,192
Diminutive, ain't they?
124
00:12:57,360 --> 00:13:00,237
- We seek the one they call Bugs Bunny.
- Yeah, Bugs Bunny.
125
00:13:00,405 --> 00:13:02,239
- Have you seen him?
- Where is this guy?
126
00:13:02,407 --> 00:13:04,199
Is he around?
127
00:13:04,367 --> 00:13:07,786
Hmm. Bugs Bunny, Bugs Bunny.
128
00:13:07,954 --> 00:13:10,956
Say, does he have, uh,
great big long ears?
129
00:13:11,124 --> 00:13:13,542
- Like this?
- Yeah. Yeah.
130
00:13:13,710 --> 00:13:16,795
And does he hop around like this?
131
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:21,884
- Yeah.
- Well, uh...
132
00:13:22,051 --> 00:13:24,303
...does he say, "What's up, doc?"
Like this:
133
00:13:26,514 --> 00:13:29,683
- Eh, what's up, doc?
- Yeah!
134
00:13:29,851 --> 00:13:31,852
Nope. Never heard of him.
135
00:13:34,522 --> 00:13:39,776
You know, maybe there is no intelligent life
out there in the universe after all.
136
00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:46,617
Hold on there, Mr. Looney Tune.
137
00:13:46,784 --> 00:13:49,036
Hey, what do you think we are, stupid?
138
00:13:49,204 --> 00:13:51,705
Don't move a muscle.
139
00:13:52,415 --> 00:13:56,210
Okay, bunny, gather up your Tune pals.
140
00:13:56,377 --> 00:13:59,296
- We're taking you for a ride. Ha, ha.
NAWT: Move it, mister.
141
00:13:59,464 --> 00:14:02,966
Totally. All right.
So, like, where are we going?
142
00:14:06,930 --> 00:14:08,931
Are we there yet?
143
00:14:09,224 --> 00:14:11,266
Sorry it took so long.
Don't worry.
144
00:14:11,434 --> 00:14:14,603
That exit wasn't clearly marked.
Hold up, right here.
145
00:14:14,771 --> 00:14:16,230
What, here?
Yes.
146
00:14:21,152 --> 00:14:23,070
Thanks for the ride, Sherm.
Appreciate it.
147
00:14:23,238 --> 00:14:25,030
- It's Stan, Mike.
- Sorry.
148
00:14:25,198 --> 00:14:28,617
But you can call me Sherm if you want to.
I've followed your whole career.
149
00:14:28,785 --> 00:14:31,662
- You're the greatest athlete that's ever lived.
- Stan, Stan, Stan.
150
00:14:32,997 --> 00:14:34,957
How do I get out?
The door doesn't work.
151
00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:38,126
- I'm sorry. I forgot... It's a classic.
- Oh, yeah.
152
00:14:38,294 --> 00:14:41,964
It's a classic, but it's got a few
peccadilloes. Hold on just a second.
153
00:14:42,131 --> 00:14:45,300
A few, huh? It's smoking, too, man.
You need to get that checked.
154
00:14:47,428 --> 00:14:48,971
Thanks for the ride.
155
00:14:49,138 --> 00:14:50,639
Oh.
156
00:14:50,974 --> 00:14:53,809
Oh, this is nice. This is a nice house.
157
00:14:53,977 --> 00:14:56,061
That is a beauty. What is that, Colonial?
158
00:14:56,229 --> 00:14:57,479
It's a nice house.
159
00:14:57,647 --> 00:14:59,982
If you need anything done
around the house, I'd be happy...
160
00:15:00,149 --> 00:15:02,276
- Oh, no, I'm fine, thanks.
- Anything you need.
161
00:15:02,443 --> 00:15:04,444
- You gave me a ride. I appreciate it.
- Sure.
162
00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:07,114
Tomorrow I'm gonna drive, okay?
So I don't need the ride.
163
00:15:08,157 --> 00:15:09,658
But thanks, though.
164
00:15:09,826 --> 00:15:10,951
Too conspicuous?
165
00:15:12,370 --> 00:15:13,495
Yeah.
166
00:15:15,206 --> 00:15:18,375
- All right. All right.
- Thanks, though.
167
00:15:18,543 --> 00:15:20,836
- Tomorrow.
- See you tomorrow.
168
00:15:29,012 --> 00:15:30,846
Come on, dog. No, not today.
169
00:15:32,223 --> 00:15:33,890
Dog, get off me. Your breath.
170
00:15:34,058 --> 00:15:36,018
- Mr. Jordan, are you okay?
- Get off of me!
171
00:15:36,185 --> 00:15:37,394
Get off of him, Charles.
172
00:15:37,562 --> 00:15:39,646
- Bad dog. Git.
- Get off of him.
173
00:15:39,814 --> 00:15:42,524
- Get off me, Charles.
- Get off of him before I cook you.
174
00:15:42,692 --> 00:15:45,402
Come on, come on.
Come on, baby. Come on.
175
00:15:52,201 --> 00:15:53,744
Get out of the car!
176
00:15:56,414 --> 00:15:58,081
Good game.
177
00:15:58,875 --> 00:16:00,500
Hey, Jeff, you okay?
178
00:16:06,799 --> 00:16:08,717
- How was your game?
JEFF: I don't want to talk.
179
00:16:08,885 --> 00:16:10,552
- Hi, Dad.
Hey, hey.
180
00:16:10,720 --> 00:16:13,180
Michael!
181
00:16:14,891 --> 00:16:17,225
- Daddy, Daddy!
- How you doing?
182
00:16:17,393 --> 00:16:19,728
Hey.
Hey.
183
00:16:20,521 --> 00:16:23,607
- Ooh. You're all covered with drool, baby.
- That's your dog.
184
00:16:23,775 --> 00:16:26,068
- What's wrong with Jeff?
- He went two for five...
185
00:16:26,235 --> 00:16:28,362
...lost 32 points in his average.
- Is that all?
186
00:16:28,529 --> 00:16:31,740
Yeah, so that puts him at like a.685
or something.
187
00:16:31,908 --> 00:16:33,575
He's batting what?
188
00:16:33,951 --> 00:16:36,870
Mm.
Smells good in here. What you cooking?
189
00:16:37,038 --> 00:16:39,915
Chicken.
- Chicken and what?
190
00:16:40,083 --> 00:16:42,918
- Chicken and collard greens.
- Good. I'm gonna need a good meal tonight.
191
00:16:46,422 --> 00:16:47,589
Is everything okay?
192
00:16:47,965 --> 00:16:51,301
I stunk up the place.
I hope this baseball thing was a good idea.
193
00:16:51,469 --> 00:16:54,680
It was another career day for Michael Jordan
at Barons Field this afternoon.
194
00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:56,098
Let's face it. This baseball...
195
00:16:56,265 --> 00:16:58,183
What are you guys watching?
196
00:16:58,351 --> 00:17:01,228
- Today he had three strikeouts.
- Is this the only thing on TV?
197
00:17:01,396 --> 00:17:04,189
- That brings his batting average down...
- What's up with this?
198
00:17:04,357 --> 00:17:06,566
...to an anemic.214,
which is also his weight.
199
00:17:06,734 --> 00:17:10,487
Baseball bat?
Get this guy a tennis racquet.
200
00:17:10,655 --> 00:17:12,572
Did everyone get mad at you?
201
00:17:13,741 --> 00:17:16,827
No. Worse.
Everyone was real nice about it.
202
00:17:16,994 --> 00:17:20,539
Michael, I know golf is your sport,
but not here.
203
00:17:20,707 --> 00:17:22,916
I think you should open up
your stance a little.
204
00:17:23,084 --> 00:17:25,335
It might make you more aggressive
at the plate.
205
00:17:25,503 --> 00:17:29,923
- You think so? I'll try to remember that.
- Watching this hurts me more than you.
206
00:17:30,091 --> 00:17:34,010
What are you guys doing
watching this stuff? It's bad for you.
207
00:17:39,976 --> 00:17:44,563
There you go. Road Runner. Beep, beep.
208
00:17:50,611 --> 00:17:53,405
Oh. Stop this cartoon.
209
00:17:55,408 --> 00:18:00,996
We've got an emergency
Cartoon Character Union Meeting to go to.
210
00:18:01,956 --> 00:18:06,001
Hey, wait for me. Hold your horses.
211
00:18:12,383 --> 00:18:14,259
Dang. Where'd they go?
212
00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:24,060
- Stop the music. Top duck coming through.
Hey!
213
00:18:24,228 --> 00:18:28,190
Jeez. It's getting so a guy can't even
get himself wet around here.
214
00:18:28,357 --> 00:18:30,650
So, what's the big emergency?
215
00:18:30,985 --> 00:18:34,780
Uh, these little guys would like to make
an announcement. Here you go, shorty.
216
00:18:34,947 --> 00:18:37,324
- Go.
- All right, all right.
217
00:18:38,785 --> 00:18:43,371
You, all of you, are now our prisoners.
218
00:18:47,084 --> 00:18:50,212
We're in big trouble now.
219
00:18:51,088 --> 00:18:54,216
We are taking you to our theme park
in outer space.
220
00:18:54,383 --> 00:18:56,885
- No fooling.
- Where you'll be our slaves.
221
00:18:57,053 --> 00:19:00,555
And placed on display for the amusement
of our paying customers.
222
00:19:00,723 --> 00:19:03,558
Oh, fear clutches my breast.
223
00:19:05,478 --> 00:19:09,648
We ain't going nowheres.
224
00:19:15,530 --> 00:19:17,864
Eh, not so fast, doc.
225
00:19:18,032 --> 00:19:21,117
You just can't turn us into slaves.
That would be bad.
226
00:19:21,285 --> 00:19:23,578
You've gotta give us a chance
to defend ourselves.
227
00:19:23,746 --> 00:19:26,373
- Oh, yeah? Who says?
Says who?
228
00:19:26,541 --> 00:19:27,707
Why?
- Just a sec.
229
00:19:28,459 --> 00:19:31,461
- There. Read them and weep.
- What's this?
230
00:19:31,629 --> 00:19:35,006
"Give them a chance
to defend themselves."
231
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:36,883
Aw. Do we have to?
232
00:19:37,051 --> 00:19:38,468
- It's in the rule book.
- It is.
233
00:19:38,636 --> 00:19:40,804
Okay. It is in the rule book.
234
00:19:42,223 --> 00:19:44,432
We have to confer.
235
00:19:46,936 --> 00:19:52,440
All right, troops. It is for us to choose
a battlefield that affords us...
236
00:19:52,608 --> 00:19:54,234
Oh, I got it.
237
00:19:54,402 --> 00:19:56,903
Yes, Private Porkster?
238
00:19:57,071 --> 00:19:59,948
How about we challenge them to a...
239
00:20:00,950 --> 00:20:02,659
...spelling bee?
- Say...
240
00:20:02,827 --> 00:20:04,953
...we could have a bowling tournament.
241
00:20:06,330 --> 00:20:08,290
Suffering succotash.
242
00:20:08,457 --> 00:20:10,292
What's wrong with all of you?
243
00:20:10,459 --> 00:20:11,960
I say we get a ladder...
244
00:20:12,128 --> 00:20:14,421
...wait till the old lady's out of the room...
245
00:20:14,589 --> 00:20:17,465
...then grab that little bird.
246
00:20:17,633 --> 00:20:21,011
Whoa, whoa, take a deep breath, Sly.
247
00:20:21,178 --> 00:20:24,848
Okay, let's analyze the competition.
248
00:20:25,349 --> 00:20:30,979
Now, uh, what are we looking at here?
We got a small race of invading aliens.
249
00:20:31,147 --> 00:20:34,399
Small arms. Short legs.
250
00:20:34,567 --> 00:20:36,151
Not very fast.
251
00:20:36,319 --> 00:20:38,069
Tiny little guys.
252
00:20:38,237 --> 00:20:40,614
Can't jump high.
253
00:20:40,823 --> 00:20:42,699
Ah.
254
00:20:45,286 --> 00:20:48,914
We challenge you to a basketball game.
255
00:20:49,081 --> 00:20:51,124
All right. Basketball it is.
256
00:20:51,292 --> 00:20:53,001
- Basketball.
- Basketball.
257
00:20:53,169 --> 00:20:55,420
- Boy, oh, boy.
- All right.
258
00:20:55,588 --> 00:20:56,630
What is basketball?
259
00:20:56,797 --> 00:20:57,839
- What's that?
- Beats me.
260
00:20:58,007 --> 00:20:59,507
We didn't have that in school.
261
00:20:59,675 --> 00:21:02,344
- Lights.
Pardon me. Sorry.
262
00:21:02,511 --> 00:21:04,512
Hey! Down in front.
263
00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:06,806
An exhilarating team sport...
264
00:21:06,974 --> 00:21:11,561
...currently growing rapidly in popularity
is basketball.
265
00:21:11,729 --> 00:21:16,524
Unlike football and baseball,
only five men can play on a team.
266
00:21:16,692 --> 00:21:21,363
It's a fast-paced, razzle-dazzle game
that requires quick wits...
267
00:21:21,530 --> 00:21:23,865
...and even faster reflexes.
268
00:21:24,408 --> 00:21:26,868
Here's how it's done
in the professional ranks...
269
00:21:27,036 --> 00:21:32,540
...the National Basketball Association,
featuring the best players in the world.
270
00:21:32,708 --> 00:21:36,419
- The best players in the world.
- The best.
271
00:21:56,273 --> 00:21:58,441
Excuse me. Oh, so sorry.
272
00:21:58,609 --> 00:22:00,068
Excuse me.
273
00:22:00,945 --> 00:22:02,570
Ow. Get your feet out of my nose.
274
00:22:02,738 --> 00:22:04,739
Quiet, they're looking.
275
00:22:04,907 --> 00:22:08,243
Hey, it's basketball.
276
00:22:08,411 --> 00:22:10,787
Where?
Whoa. Now what?
277
00:22:14,792 --> 00:22:15,875
Hey, hey!
What?
278
00:22:16,043 --> 00:22:17,877
She's looking again.
Close it up.
279
00:22:18,045 --> 00:22:19,462
- Tightly.
- Aah.
280
00:22:19,630 --> 00:22:21,172
You poked me again.
281
00:22:22,925 --> 00:22:24,009
- Sweetheart?
- What?
282
00:22:24,176 --> 00:22:27,262
- I thought you'd get better seats.
- This is as good as I could get.
283
00:22:27,430 --> 00:22:30,682
This guy next to me is doing something
very weird in his raincoat.
284
00:22:30,850 --> 00:22:33,893
Honey, will you just let me watch the game?
Barkley's killing us.
285
00:22:34,270 --> 00:22:36,479
Hey, someone's killing someone.
286
00:22:36,647 --> 00:22:38,356
No. Seriously?
287
00:22:38,733 --> 00:22:41,067
Wow, a killer.
Let me see.
288
00:22:43,279 --> 00:22:44,988
There. That's him, the killer.
289
00:22:46,991 --> 00:22:48,158
He's big.
290
00:22:48,325 --> 00:22:50,076
He's good.
291
00:22:50,244 --> 00:22:51,453
He's mine.
292
00:22:51,620 --> 00:22:53,997
Okay, go get him.
Yeah.
293
00:23:07,303 --> 00:23:11,514
Get back on defense.
Let's go. Get back on defense, man.
294
00:23:16,729 --> 00:23:18,730
What are you doing?
295
00:23:26,530 --> 00:23:28,239
Time out. Call time out.
296
00:23:29,617 --> 00:23:32,160
What's wrong with you, man?
You're killing us.
297
00:23:32,328 --> 00:23:34,996
- Let him in. Open up.
- Open.
298
00:23:35,164 --> 00:23:37,874
Wow. He did it.
299
00:23:38,042 --> 00:23:40,627
I got it. I got his talent.
300
00:23:40,795 --> 00:23:42,045
- All right.
- Super.
301
00:23:42,213 --> 00:23:45,131
- Sit down, Chuck.
- Man, I'm fine. I am fine.
302
00:23:45,299 --> 00:23:47,092
No, no. I played you too many minutes.
303
00:23:47,259 --> 00:23:50,053
- But I'm not tired.
- Go get the doctor.
304
00:23:59,188 --> 00:24:00,939
- What's up, man? You all right?
- Yeah.
305
00:24:01,107 --> 00:24:02,816
You sure?
306
00:24:03,609 --> 00:24:07,070
Come on, we're okay.
You're okay. Come on, let's go.
307
00:24:12,827 --> 00:24:15,036
Come on, Patrick. It's showtime.
308
00:24:16,288 --> 00:24:17,664
What's wrong with him?
309
00:24:24,630 --> 00:24:26,047
Popcorn...
310
00:24:26,340 --> 00:24:27,632
In a shocking development...
311
00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:31,553
...five NBA players have been placed
on the disabled list in the last 24 hours...
312
00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:34,013
...all suffering from the same
mysterious ailment.
313
00:24:34,181 --> 00:24:35,765
- Yeah? Hmm.
- Whatever this mystery is...
314
00:24:35,933 --> 00:24:39,519
...it affects the player's coordination.
- I'll be home in a couple days.
315
00:24:39,687 --> 00:24:41,938
- Watch Patrick Ewing.
- Put your mom on the phone.
316
00:24:43,566 --> 00:24:46,401
- It wasn't just in New York.
- Hey, baby. How you doing?
317
00:24:46,569 --> 00:24:50,321
- Check out the highlights.
- You watching TV?
318
00:24:52,324 --> 00:24:53,741
What the hell is going on?
319
00:24:53,909 --> 00:24:58,663
- You gonna be all right?
- I'm ready, coach. All right.
320
00:24:59,290 --> 00:25:01,291
Looks like I retired just in time.
321
00:25:03,252 --> 00:25:07,922
All right, baby, gotta go.
I'll call you later, okay? Love you. Bye.
322
00:25:08,090 --> 00:25:09,132
It's open!
323
00:25:09,633 --> 00:25:12,719
Come on, it's game time.
Get your Hanes on. Lace up your Nikes.
324
00:25:12,887 --> 00:25:16,347
Grab your Wheaties and your Gatorade
and we'll pick up a Big Mac on the way.
325
00:25:16,515 --> 00:25:18,892
Now we take you live
to the Forum in Los Angeles...
326
00:25:19,059 --> 00:25:21,394
...where the Lakers are refusing
to take the court.
327
00:25:24,231 --> 00:25:25,315
Guys, we gotta get dressed.
328
00:25:25,482 --> 00:25:29,277
We got a game in five minutes.
I mean, we're talking about a huge fine here.
329
00:25:29,445 --> 00:25:31,529
- No, we can't go in the locker room.
- Oh, man.
330
00:25:31,697 --> 00:25:34,908
You heard what happened to Barkley
and Ewing. There's germs in there.
331
00:25:35,075 --> 00:25:38,203
Cedric, that was in New York,
3000 miles away.
332
00:25:38,370 --> 00:25:40,997
Bacteria can travel faster
than the speed of light.
333
00:25:41,165 --> 00:25:44,292
- It could be Invasion of the Body Snatchers.
Yeah, could be.
334
00:25:44,460 --> 00:25:46,836
All right. Dress in the hallway.
335
00:25:47,129 --> 00:25:49,380
Okay.
336
00:25:52,092 --> 00:25:57,180
Okay, okay, now, which one of you maroons
has ever played basketball before?
337
00:25:57,348 --> 00:26:01,768
I have, coach. And there's an important
strategic question I need to ask you.
338
00:26:01,936 --> 00:26:03,144
Yes, yes?
339
00:26:06,899 --> 00:26:10,318
What do you think? I'm kind of partial
to purple and gold, myself.
340
00:26:10,486 --> 00:26:12,987
It goes better with my coloring.
A one, two, three, four.
341
00:26:13,155 --> 00:26:15,615
Guys? Nice outfit, Daffy.
342
00:26:15,783 --> 00:26:20,495
The little aliens say it's their turn
to, uh, use the court.
343
00:26:20,663 --> 00:26:23,915
Sure, let the little pipsqueaks
knock themselves out.
344
00:26:24,083 --> 00:26:27,001
Too bad you can't practice
getting taller, boys.
345
00:26:34,802 --> 00:26:36,844
Whoa!
Ah!
346
00:27:07,334 --> 00:27:08,584
Hey, little pig.
347
00:27:09,712 --> 00:27:11,671
- Boo.
- Aah!
348
00:27:13,048 --> 00:27:14,966
I wet myself.
349
00:27:17,970 --> 00:27:21,014
Time to play a little basketball.
350
00:27:25,394 --> 00:27:28,271
Those little pipsqueaks
just turned into superstars.
351
00:27:28,439 --> 00:27:31,065
They're monsters.
352
00:27:31,233 --> 00:27:33,109
Suffering succotash.
353
00:27:33,277 --> 00:27:35,361
They're Monstars.
354
00:27:37,406 --> 00:27:39,574
Bye-bye.
355
00:27:42,077 --> 00:27:45,121
Eh,
I think we might need a little bit of help.
356
00:27:46,623 --> 00:27:48,583
A hundred and seventy-five yards.
357
00:27:48,751 --> 00:27:52,920
Okay, little fella.
You my friend or are you my enemy?
358
00:27:53,088 --> 00:27:55,673
You are my friend, right?
You are my ally.
359
00:27:56,675 --> 00:27:59,427
You are my associate,
my personal assistant.
360
00:27:59,595 --> 00:28:02,889
You are my weapon. You are leaving.
361
00:28:04,350 --> 00:28:07,310
- Great shot.
- Nice shot, Mr. Murray.
362
00:28:12,358 --> 00:28:14,150
You can stop posing now.
363
00:28:16,904 --> 00:28:18,780
- Good try.
- Not bad, not bad.
364
00:28:18,947 --> 00:28:21,032
BILL: Something for you to shoot at.
- Hit it good.
365
00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:23,076
Do my best.
366
00:28:24,453 --> 00:28:26,120
It was a good shot.
367
00:28:26,288 --> 00:28:28,164
Yeah, I know.
368
00:28:28,332 --> 00:28:29,791
Mike, I gotta ask you something.
369
00:28:29,958 --> 00:28:31,584
The NBA has to face reality.
370
00:28:31,752 --> 00:28:33,878
What's happening to these players
is serious.
371
00:28:34,046 --> 00:28:36,714
They're gonna need new players
with talent.
372
00:28:36,882 --> 00:28:40,968
Guys who are skilled, but never really
thought about a professional career before.
373
00:28:42,554 --> 00:28:44,138
You think I got a shot?
374
00:28:46,141 --> 00:28:47,558
- Come on, really?
- No.
375
00:28:47,726 --> 00:28:51,229
- Don't kid me.
- Listen. It's a man's game.
376
00:28:51,605 --> 00:28:53,689
- You can't play.
- What if I tried really hard?
377
00:28:53,857 --> 00:28:55,900
Keep it down. I'm trying to hit this ball.
378
00:28:56,193 --> 00:28:57,944
It's because I'm white, isn't it?
379
00:28:58,112 --> 00:29:00,279
No. Larry's white. So what?
380
00:29:00,447 --> 00:29:03,991
Larry's not white. Larry's clear.
381
00:29:05,369 --> 00:29:06,994
- Good shot, Larry.
That's nice.
382
00:29:07,162 --> 00:29:09,038
Get inside his ball.
383
00:29:09,331 --> 00:29:10,415
Whoa.
384
00:29:10,582 --> 00:29:12,208
You clowns can't beat that.
385
00:29:12,376 --> 00:29:14,460
- My best shot ever.
- You haven't played long.
386
00:29:14,628 --> 00:29:15,670
A Hall-of-Fame shot.
387
00:29:15,838 --> 00:29:18,089
- Really nice shot, Mr. Bird.
LARRY: Larry, please.
388
00:29:18,257 --> 00:29:20,508
- Nice shot, Mr. Larry.
- Nice shot, Larry.
389
00:29:20,676 --> 00:29:22,427
You can do this.
390
00:29:22,594 --> 00:29:24,846
Don't be nervous. You can do this.
391
00:29:25,013 --> 00:29:27,807
Larry, you feel that the NBA
has to face reality, don't you?
392
00:29:27,975 --> 00:29:31,310
Gotta look for more dominant players
in places they never looked before.
393
00:29:31,478 --> 00:29:34,230
Just look at the ball.
Visualize where you want it to go.
394
00:29:34,398 --> 00:29:37,525
- Right, right, right.
- Be the ball. Be the ball.
395
00:29:37,693 --> 00:29:38,943
Get off the tee.
396
00:29:39,111 --> 00:29:40,903
You can't jump.
397
00:29:42,406 --> 00:29:43,823
I... Yeah, go on.
398
00:29:44,533 --> 00:29:46,993
- Close to the pin?
Close to the pin? For dinner?
399
00:29:47,161 --> 00:29:49,454
Sounds good.
I'll go close to the pin.
400
00:29:49,621 --> 00:29:51,706
- Okay, cool.
- I'll take some of that.
401
00:29:54,168 --> 00:29:55,334
That's not bad.
402
00:29:56,003 --> 00:29:57,211
Good shot.
403
00:29:57,379 --> 00:29:59,130
Get down.
404
00:30:00,048 --> 00:30:02,216
Look at that. Look at that spin.
405
00:30:13,270 --> 00:30:14,562
Come on.
406
00:30:16,940 --> 00:30:18,191
It is alive.
407
00:30:21,236 --> 00:30:26,115
Yes! Yes! My first hole in one. Yes!
408
00:30:26,617 --> 00:30:27,658
Oh.
409
00:30:27,826 --> 00:30:30,328
Don't say it.
Never seen one of these before.
410
00:30:30,496 --> 00:30:34,499
Larry, nothing but the bottom of the cup.
411
00:30:34,666 --> 00:30:37,335
That's his ball too.
- Yeah, yeah, it's my ball. Sorry.
412
00:30:37,503 --> 00:30:39,337
- Let me get a picture.
- You guys are jealous.
413
00:30:39,505 --> 00:30:43,966
All right, here we go. Now, you gotta smile.
Reach in for the ball and then smile, okay?
414
00:30:44,134 --> 00:30:45,843
- Yes.
- And you think, "This is good."
415
00:30:46,011 --> 00:30:47,470
Just take the picture.
- Okay.
416
00:30:57,606 --> 00:30:59,273
- What kind of camera is that?
- Just...
417
00:30:59,441 --> 00:31:01,359
Don't point it at me. Close the lens cap.
418
00:31:01,527 --> 00:31:03,486
- I didn't do anything.
- Where did he go?
419
00:31:08,242 --> 00:31:09,742
Hey!
420
00:31:10,327 --> 00:31:13,037
No, no, no!
421
00:31:24,967 --> 00:31:28,469
Oh, uh, look out for that first step,
doc, it's a real lulu.
422
00:31:29,096 --> 00:31:30,137
Bugs Bunny?
423
00:31:30,305 --> 00:31:32,431
Eh, you were expecting
maybe the Easter Bunny?
424
00:31:33,100 --> 00:31:35,518
- You're a cartoon. You're not real.
- Not real, eh?
425
00:31:35,686 --> 00:31:37,979
If I weren't real, could I do this?
426
00:31:41,024 --> 00:31:42,441
Ugh.
427
00:31:42,609 --> 00:31:44,235
Oh, look. Is that Michael?
428
00:31:44,403 --> 00:31:46,070
It's Michael.
429
00:31:46,238 --> 00:31:47,655
It's Air Jordan.
430
00:31:48,657 --> 00:31:50,449
Basketball.
431
00:31:50,617 --> 00:31:52,660
Ooh. I tought I taw...
432
00:31:53,078 --> 00:31:56,372
I did. I did see Michael Jordan.
433
00:31:56,540 --> 00:32:00,626
Pardon me, Mr. Jordan.
Uh, can I have your auto...?
434
00:32:00,794 --> 00:32:02,169
Your John Hancock, please?
435
00:32:02,337 --> 00:32:04,463
Back off. Let the doctor take a look.
436
00:32:07,426 --> 00:32:09,427
- A little high.
- No.
437
00:32:09,595 --> 00:32:10,761
Going down.
438
00:32:10,929 --> 00:32:12,680
No!
439
00:32:17,894 --> 00:32:21,022
So, what do you say we go
for a little spin?
440
00:32:23,859 --> 00:32:27,069
Hmm.
Now, let's see what we got inside here.
441
00:32:29,448 --> 00:32:31,115
Say "ah."
442
00:32:33,035 --> 00:32:35,578
All right. He's okay.
443
00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:40,750
- What's going on here?
- Why, Michael, I thought you'd never ask.
444
00:32:41,251 --> 00:32:45,254
These aliens from outer space want
to make us slaves in their theme park.
445
00:32:45,422 --> 00:32:46,881
What do we care? They're little.
446
00:32:47,049 --> 00:32:49,258
So we challenged them
to a basketball game.
447
00:32:49,426 --> 00:32:52,345
But then they show up
and they ain't so little. They're huge.
448
00:32:52,512 --> 00:32:55,806
We need to beat these guys,
because they're talking about slavery.
449
00:32:55,974 --> 00:32:59,852
They'll make us do stand-up comedy,
the same jokes every night for all eternity.
450
00:33:00,020 --> 00:33:03,397
We'll be locked up like wild animals
and then trotted out to perform...
451
00:33:03,565 --> 00:33:07,693
...for a bunch of lowbrow, bug-eyed,
fat-headed, humor-challenged aliens.
452
00:33:07,861 --> 00:33:10,488
Uh, what I'm trying to say is...
453
00:33:10,656 --> 00:33:12,948
...we need your help!
454
00:33:13,700 --> 00:33:15,409
Yeah, but I'm a baseball player now.
455
00:33:15,577 --> 00:33:19,830
Right. And I'm a Shakespearean actor.
456
00:33:23,043 --> 00:33:27,838
Mike? Michael? It's Stan. Stan Podolak.
457
00:33:28,006 --> 00:33:30,675
Uh, look,
I need you to come out now, okay?
458
00:33:30,842 --> 00:33:32,968
Because you got a baseball game
tomorrow.
459
00:33:33,136 --> 00:33:36,931
And I'd look pretty stupid
if you don't show up.
460
00:33:37,099 --> 00:33:39,767
Think Michael's all right?
I hate to leave him like this.
461
00:33:39,935 --> 00:33:44,063
I'm sure he's fine. I think he just had to
get away from that Stan character.
462
00:33:44,231 --> 00:33:46,357
- God, he's pathetic, isn't he?
- Yeah.
463
00:33:46,525 --> 00:33:48,359
I'm gonna give us both twos back there.
464
00:33:48,527 --> 00:33:50,778
We weren't in any kind of
emotional state to putt.
465
00:33:50,946 --> 00:33:52,697
- I think that's fair.
- Yeah.
466
00:33:52,864 --> 00:33:57,284
Now, if Mike is gone,
the NBA is gonna need some new people.
467
00:33:57,452 --> 00:33:58,744
There's room at the top.
468
00:33:58,912 --> 00:34:01,706
An exciting guy who could maybe
even perform at half-time.
469
00:34:01,873 --> 00:34:04,667
You still tight with David Stern?
A phone call from you...
470
00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:08,754
Look, I want to help, but I haven't
played basketball in a long time.
471
00:34:08,922 --> 00:34:11,298
- My timing's all off.
- Eh, we'll fix your timing.
472
00:34:11,800 --> 00:34:13,467
Look at our facilities.
473
00:34:13,635 --> 00:34:15,970
We've got hoops.
474
00:34:16,138 --> 00:34:17,805
We got weights.
475
00:34:18,306 --> 00:34:21,058
We've got balls. Whoa!
476
00:34:21,226 --> 00:34:23,394
You sure do. This place is a mess.
477
00:34:23,562 --> 00:34:26,063
Mess?
You're worried about a little mess?
478
00:34:26,231 --> 00:34:29,483
There's nothing here
a little spit shine wouldn't fix.
479
00:34:29,651 --> 00:34:31,902
- Spit shine!
- Spit shine!
480
00:34:50,756 --> 00:34:52,381
Lemony-fresh.
481
00:34:52,549 --> 00:34:54,258
You guys are nuts.
482
00:34:54,426 --> 00:34:57,470
Correction: We're Looney Tunes.
483
00:34:57,637 --> 00:35:03,350
And as such are the exclusive property
and trademark of Warner Bros. Inc.
484
00:35:11,693 --> 00:35:13,527
I'm here.
485
00:35:14,321 --> 00:35:16,322
Me too.
486
00:35:17,073 --> 00:35:18,616
That hurt.
487
00:35:21,077 --> 00:35:22,119
Who are these guys?
488
00:35:22,287 --> 00:35:26,916
Well, uh, remember the tiny aliens
I told you about?
489
00:35:27,083 --> 00:35:28,292
Oh.
490
00:35:28,460 --> 00:35:32,296
You heard of the Dream Team?
Well, we're the Mean Team, wussy-man.
491
00:35:32,464 --> 00:35:34,381
- Wussy-man.
- Wussy-man?
492
00:35:34,549 --> 00:35:37,843
We're the Monstars. M-O-N... Um...
493
00:35:38,011 --> 00:35:40,554
Let's see what you got, chump.
494
00:35:41,681 --> 00:35:43,307
I don't play basketball anymore.
495
00:35:43,475 --> 00:35:45,935
"I don't play basketball anymore."
496
00:35:47,312 --> 00:35:49,230
Maybe you're chicken.
497
00:35:50,857 --> 00:35:53,526
I say, I resemble that remark.
498
00:35:53,693 --> 00:35:54,735
You calling me chicken?
499
00:35:54,903 --> 00:35:56,529
Hey. Come here.
500
00:36:00,742 --> 00:36:02,618
Here you go. Take him.
501
00:36:03,161 --> 00:36:06,205
Watch the footwork. Can you believe it?
502
00:36:07,415 --> 00:36:10,417
Get out of the way.
503
00:36:13,839 --> 00:36:17,675
Hey, everybody. Look at your hero now.
504
00:36:21,930 --> 00:36:23,681
You guys are making a big mistake.
505
00:36:23,849 --> 00:36:27,142
You're all washed up, baldy.
506
00:36:27,310 --> 00:36:28,435
Baldy?
507
00:36:28,603 --> 00:36:29,979
He is not washed up.
508
00:36:30,146 --> 00:36:31,939
- Michael's the greatest ever.
- Shut up.
509
00:36:32,232 --> 00:36:33,858
Ooh.
510
00:36:36,695 --> 00:36:38,821
My poor little cranium.
511
00:36:38,989 --> 00:36:42,408
- You okay?
- Yeah, are you okay?
512
00:36:42,576 --> 00:36:43,617
Whoops.
513
00:36:43,785 --> 00:36:47,496
You're not scared of them,
are you, Michael?
514
00:36:56,882 --> 00:36:59,133
- Let's play some basketball.
TUNES: Yeah.
515
00:37:02,554 --> 00:37:05,598
Yeah, serve her! Come on! Rebound!
516
00:37:21,072 --> 00:37:23,991
You're...
You're Charles Barkley.
517
00:37:25,702 --> 00:37:28,662
Girls. Come on over. Hurry up. Hurry.
518
00:37:28,830 --> 00:37:31,040
Look. It's Charles Barkley.
519
00:37:31,207 --> 00:37:32,249
Hey, can I play?
520
00:37:58,818 --> 00:38:00,611
You're not Charles Barkley.
521
00:38:00,779 --> 00:38:02,780
Just a wannabe who looks like him.
522
00:38:03,823 --> 00:38:06,283
Sorry. Break out.
523
00:38:06,451 --> 00:38:08,953
You shouldn't even be here. Be gone.
524
00:38:09,704 --> 00:38:11,664
Wannabe. Be gone.
525
00:38:11,915 --> 00:38:13,666
Just a few more tests, gentlemen.
526
00:38:13,833 --> 00:38:18,379
Electrolyte levels, glucose,
CBCs, RBCs, etcetera.
527
00:38:18,546 --> 00:38:20,756
And we've scheduled a 12-lead
stress test...
528
00:38:20,924 --> 00:38:24,635
...and neurological battery
to include EEG, reflex tests...
529
00:38:25,136 --> 00:38:30,307
And this girl, 5-feet-nothing,
blocked my shot.
530
00:38:30,475 --> 00:38:32,977
When did you first start having
this dream?
531
00:38:33,144 --> 00:38:35,813
It wasn't a dream. It really happened.
532
00:38:38,483 --> 00:38:42,903
And it climbed up my back
and into my brain.
533
00:38:43,071 --> 00:38:46,991
Are there any other areas
besides basketball...
534
00:38:47,158 --> 00:38:52,204
...where you find yourself
unable to perform?
535
00:38:54,708 --> 00:38:56,959
- No.
- Just asking.
536
00:38:59,963 --> 00:39:04,133
I've been MRI'd, EKG'd,
x-rayed, laser beamed...
537
00:39:04,300 --> 00:39:06,468
I promise I'll never swear again.
538
00:39:06,636 --> 00:39:08,595
I'll never get another technical.
539
00:39:08,763 --> 00:39:09,930
I'll never trash-talk.
540
00:39:10,098 --> 00:39:11,306
I've got other skills.
541
00:39:11,474 --> 00:39:14,018
- I could go back and work on the farm.
- Really?
542
00:39:14,185 --> 00:39:17,646
Or maybe I could go back to the jungle
and be a missionary again.
543
00:39:17,814 --> 00:39:20,816
What are you saying?
That I'm trying to disobey my mama?
544
00:39:20,984 --> 00:39:22,776
I didn't say that. You did, Muggsy.
545
00:39:22,944 --> 00:39:24,069
But I love my mama.
546
00:39:24,237 --> 00:39:26,280
Still can't find anything wrong with us.
547
00:39:26,448 --> 00:39:28,115
Hey, maybe nothing's wrong with us.
548
00:39:28,283 --> 00:39:30,534
That's right, Muggs.
Maybe it's just in our head.
549
00:39:30,702 --> 00:39:33,245
We're fine.
It's just some psychosomatic deal.
550
00:39:33,413 --> 00:39:36,081
Or something to do with the moon,
or the alignment of the planet.
551
00:39:37,542 --> 00:39:39,293
I'll never go out with Madonna again.
552
00:39:43,882 --> 00:39:45,382
What are you doing?
553
00:39:45,550 --> 00:39:48,802
- I'm, uh... I'm fixing a divot.
- Oh.
554
00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:53,098
He's fixing a divot!
555
00:40:22,921 --> 00:40:25,255
Has anyone here ever played basketball?
556
00:40:25,423 --> 00:40:27,508
Um, I have.
557
00:40:28,343 --> 00:40:29,968
I'd like to try out for the team.
558
00:40:31,012 --> 00:40:33,972
- Hey.
- Hi. My name is Lola Bunny.
559
00:40:34,140 --> 00:40:36,934
- Lola?
- Ha, ha. Yes.
560
00:40:37,102 --> 00:40:40,854
Hello. Eh, my name is Bugs.
561
00:40:41,022 --> 00:40:43,524
Ahem. You want to play a little
one-on-one, doll?
562
00:40:44,067 --> 00:40:45,651
- "Doll"?
- Uh-huh.
563
00:40:45,819 --> 00:40:50,280
- On the court, Bugs.
- Sure.
564
00:40:50,448 --> 00:40:51,532
Ooh. She's hot.
565
00:40:52,909 --> 00:40:54,743
There she goes.
566
00:40:54,911 --> 00:40:57,788
- Ready?
- Yes.
567
00:40:58,873 --> 00:41:00,749
I got it. I got it.
568
00:41:03,545 --> 00:41:05,003
That girl's got some skills.
569
00:41:06,881 --> 00:41:08,298
Yes?
570
00:41:11,136 --> 00:41:14,680
Don't ever call me "doll."
571
00:41:15,557 --> 00:41:17,182
Check.
572
00:41:19,227 --> 00:41:21,645
Hey, nice playing with you.
573
00:41:21,813 --> 00:41:22,855
Very smooth.
574
00:41:23,022 --> 00:41:26,024
Ah, she's obviously nuts about me.
575
00:41:26,192 --> 00:41:27,234
Obviously.
576
00:41:28,611 --> 00:41:30,237
Okay. Where's the ball?
577
00:41:31,865 --> 00:41:33,157
Let's do some drills.
578
00:41:38,913 --> 00:41:40,956
Can anyone lend me a pair of sneakers?
579
00:41:41,124 --> 00:41:43,417
Uh, sneakers?
580
00:41:47,255 --> 00:41:49,131
- Sorry.
- Someone has to go to my house...
581
00:41:49,299 --> 00:41:52,217
...and pick up my basketball gear.
- To your house?
582
00:41:52,385 --> 00:41:54,178
- In 3-D land?
Yeah.
583
00:41:54,345 --> 00:41:56,430
Whatever you do...
584
00:41:56,598 --> 00:41:58,599
...don't forget my North Carolina shorts.
585
00:41:58,766 --> 00:42:01,435
Your shorts? From college?
586
00:42:01,603 --> 00:42:04,438
I wore them under my Chicago Bulls
uniform every game.
587
00:42:05,815 --> 00:42:07,941
Hey. I washed them after every game.
588
00:42:08,109 --> 00:42:09,276
- Yeah.
- Sure.
589
00:42:09,444 --> 00:42:10,819
- I did.
- Gross.
590
00:42:12,447 --> 00:42:15,115
The view back here stinks.
591
00:42:15,283 --> 00:42:16,825
Whoa.
What?
592
00:42:16,993 --> 00:42:18,994
We're right in front of Michael's house.
593
00:42:19,162 --> 00:42:20,621
I knew that.
594
00:42:20,788 --> 00:42:23,498
Shh. Okay, let's go in this way.
595
00:42:23,666 --> 00:42:26,168
I say, let's go in that way.
596
00:42:27,295 --> 00:42:30,214
He just never learns.
597
00:42:31,799 --> 00:42:33,467
Now, let me see.
598
00:42:33,635 --> 00:42:38,055
I must be very, very close.
599
00:42:40,225 --> 00:42:41,391
Mother.
600
00:42:47,273 --> 00:42:49,191
Nice digs.
601
00:42:51,694 --> 00:42:55,614
Well, well. I wonder who that could be.
602
00:42:57,283 --> 00:43:00,369
Twinkle, twinkle, little star.
603
00:43:00,536 --> 00:43:03,538
Shh. Everyone's sleeping.
604
00:43:03,706 --> 00:43:05,707
- I knew that.
- Come on, come on.
605
00:43:05,875 --> 00:43:08,043
We gotta find Michael's basketball stuff.
606
00:43:09,712 --> 00:43:12,172
Nope. Nothing in here.
607
00:43:12,882 --> 00:43:16,343
Nope. Ah, but a very nice dinette set.
608
00:43:16,511 --> 00:43:19,054
Uh-uh. Not here.
609
00:43:19,222 --> 00:43:20,639
Let's look upstairs.
610
00:43:20,807 --> 00:43:22,933
Yes, oh, fearless leader.
611
00:43:23,768 --> 00:43:27,229
So he needs his special underwear.
612
00:43:27,397 --> 00:43:29,022
Oh. Shh.
613
00:43:29,190 --> 00:43:32,067
Sorry.
You think she's got enough toys?
614
00:43:32,235 --> 00:43:36,280
Speaking of toys, you know all
those mugs and t-shirts and lunch boxes...
615
00:43:36,447 --> 00:43:38,490
...with our pictures on them?
- Yeah.
616
00:43:38,658 --> 00:43:40,784
You, uh, ever see any money
from all that stuff?
617
00:43:40,952 --> 00:43:43,620
Ha. Not a cent.
Hmm. Me neither.
618
00:43:43,788 --> 00:43:44,955
It's a crying shame.
619
00:43:45,123 --> 00:43:48,250
We gotta get new agents.
We're getting screwed.
620
00:43:48,418 --> 00:43:49,960
We have found the trophy room.
621
00:43:50,128 --> 00:43:52,045
Now spread out and search the place.
622
00:43:52,213 --> 00:43:55,382
Yes, sahib. Oh, brother.
623
00:43:55,550 --> 00:43:58,760
Here I am, in the peak of my form
playing second banana...
624
00:43:58,928 --> 00:44:01,555
...to some sort of a harebrain.
- Yap, yap, yap. Hmm.
625
00:44:01,723 --> 00:44:04,308
This could be useful. Aha.
626
00:44:04,726 --> 00:44:06,268
If this were a union job, I...
627
00:44:07,061 --> 00:44:08,312
That's very nice.
628
00:44:09,439 --> 00:44:11,356
Oh, one of his shoes.
629
00:44:16,571 --> 00:44:18,071
Where is that other shoe?
630
00:44:19,949 --> 00:44:21,825
Where are you?
631
00:44:22,660 --> 00:44:24,077
Eureka!
632
00:44:25,079 --> 00:44:26,663
Come to Papa.
633
00:44:29,667 --> 00:44:33,003
- Oops.
- What a fuzz-foot. You are so clumsy.
634
00:44:34,422 --> 00:44:36,798
- Catch, feather head.
- Thanks.
635
00:44:40,595 --> 00:44:44,848
- Well, time to go.
- Did we get everything?
636
00:44:45,016 --> 00:44:47,309
- The shorts.
- The shorts.
637
00:44:47,477 --> 00:44:49,436
In there?
638
00:44:49,604 --> 00:44:51,521
Okay, I'll check.
639
00:44:55,777 --> 00:44:57,819
I found the shorts.
640
00:45:02,075 --> 00:45:04,409
The pain.
641
00:45:04,786 --> 00:45:07,996
- I'm right behind you, pal.
- Uh, that's none too reassuring.
642
00:45:08,164 --> 00:45:10,582
Nice puppy. How's about a bone?
643
00:45:11,584 --> 00:45:14,836
- No dice.
- What about a nice holiday ham?
644
00:45:15,004 --> 00:45:17,964
- He ain't buying it. Can't we talk this over?
- Down, Beethoven.
645
00:45:18,132 --> 00:45:20,592
Ooh. The kids are here.
646
00:45:23,096 --> 00:45:25,389
Give it to me, Charles.
647
00:45:28,476 --> 00:45:30,852
- Here you go, Bugs.
- Thanks, kid.
648
00:45:31,145 --> 00:45:32,187
Shoo. Shoo.
649
00:45:33,564 --> 00:45:39,319
Bad dog. That is the last time
I'm ever working with dogs or children.
650
00:45:39,487 --> 00:45:41,780
- Bye-bye.
- Hey, where you going?
651
00:45:41,948 --> 00:45:45,492
Well, uh, you see, the Looney Tunes have
a big basketball game coming up...
652
00:45:45,660 --> 00:45:49,121
...and, uh, your dad's gonna play.
- All right.
653
00:45:49,288 --> 00:45:51,540
Yeah. But don't tell anybody.
654
00:46:08,349 --> 00:46:10,350
I see aliens.
655
00:46:10,518 --> 00:46:13,895
Little aliens from outer space.
656
00:46:14,063 --> 00:46:17,107
They forced their way inside your bodies.
657
00:46:17,275 --> 00:46:22,696
They need your talent
to win a basketball game against...
658
00:46:22,864 --> 00:46:24,739
...Bugs Bunny.
Bugs Bunny?
659
00:46:24,907 --> 00:46:31,163
I also see Michael Jordan
being sucked down a golf hole...
660
00:46:31,330 --> 00:46:32,831
...by furry creatures.
661
00:46:32,999 --> 00:46:36,209
- That's it. We're out of here.
- We're leaving now.
662
00:46:36,377 --> 00:46:39,421
- Let's try some acupuncture.
- Good idea. Bye.
663
00:46:39,714 --> 00:46:42,382
This is it. This is it.
664
00:46:42,550 --> 00:46:45,343
I don't know where you are, Michael,
but wherever you are...
665
00:46:45,511 --> 00:46:49,055
...you obviously enjoy being there
more than spending time with me.
666
00:46:49,223 --> 00:46:52,726
You better hope this Jordan character
still know how to play hoops.
667
00:46:52,894 --> 00:46:54,728
You and me both, brother.
668
00:46:54,896 --> 00:46:57,939
Listen, how is this for a new team name:
669
00:46:58,107 --> 00:47:00,525
- The Ducks.
Please.
670
00:47:00,693 --> 00:47:04,404
What kind of Mickey Mouse organization
would name their team the Ducks?
671
00:47:04,572 --> 00:47:07,407
So sue me. It's just a suggestion.
672
00:47:12,205 --> 00:47:13,580
You're doing it.
673
00:47:13,748 --> 00:47:14,915
You're becoming mighty.
674
00:47:15,082 --> 00:47:17,792
- Go!
Come on, guys. No pain, no gain.
675
00:47:17,960 --> 00:47:20,128
I don't hear it. What is it?
676
00:47:20,713 --> 00:47:22,881
Come on.
- Come on.
677
00:47:23,883 --> 00:47:26,384
- Eh, guys?
ALL: Yes?
678
00:47:26,552 --> 00:47:30,013
Look who's finally ready to play.
679
00:47:36,687 --> 00:47:38,522
Let's see if I remember how to do this.
680
00:47:45,571 --> 00:47:46,863
Nice.
681
00:48:09,804 --> 00:48:10,929
Michael!
682
00:48:13,224 --> 00:48:16,434
Is it really you? Oh!
683
00:48:16,602 --> 00:48:21,856
Thank God you're all right.
Oh! I was so worried.
684
00:48:22,024 --> 00:48:24,651
Come on, Stan. Don't hug me, please.
685
00:48:24,819 --> 00:48:26,278
- Sorry.
- What are you doing here?
686
00:48:26,445 --> 00:48:28,697
I gotta take you back.
You got baseball practice.
687
00:48:28,864 --> 00:48:32,450
I can't. I'm helping my friends
in their basketball game.
688
00:48:36,455 --> 00:48:39,249
Michael, you know that your friends
are cartoon characters?
689
00:48:40,793 --> 00:48:42,752
Yeah. So?
690
00:48:42,920 --> 00:48:47,424
Doesn't bother you, it doesn't bother me.
Let me help. Let me help. I can help.
691
00:48:47,592 --> 00:48:49,593
- What can you do?
- Well, you know, I mean...
692
00:48:49,760 --> 00:48:52,929
...I may not be very tall, but I'm slow.
693
00:48:53,097 --> 00:48:55,807
- And large.
- And a dork.
694
00:48:55,975 --> 00:48:58,059
I'll do anything, Michael. Anything.
695
00:48:58,227 --> 00:49:00,854
- Anything?
- Anything.
696
00:49:02,023 --> 00:49:04,774
Come here. Come here for a second.
697
00:49:05,359 --> 00:49:07,152
- Sit right here.
- Okay.
698
00:49:07,320 --> 00:49:09,112
- Okay?
- Okay. No problem.
699
00:49:09,280 --> 00:49:11,197
All right. All right, let's go, team.
700
00:49:13,034 --> 00:49:15,619
If somebody gets injured,
we could see a lot of minutes.
701
00:49:15,786 --> 00:49:18,538
I'm a cheerleader.
702
00:49:36,724 --> 00:49:39,601
Mr. Commissioner,
we've got the place sealed off.
703
00:49:39,935 --> 00:49:44,731
Quiet!
Ladies and gentlemen, please, quiet!
704
00:49:44,899 --> 00:49:48,485
Listen. After meeting with team owners,
I have decided...
705
00:49:48,653 --> 00:49:52,906
...that until we can guarantee the health
and safety of our NBA players...
706
00:49:53,074 --> 00:49:56,284
...there will be no more basketball
this season.
707
00:50:18,307 --> 00:50:19,349
Yes.
708
00:50:35,491 --> 00:50:38,076
Just get out of my way.
709
00:50:44,709 --> 00:50:46,292
- Ready?
Yes!
710
00:50:46,836 --> 00:50:48,128
Let's go.
711
00:50:54,051 --> 00:50:55,510
Are these the best seats?
712
00:50:55,678 --> 00:50:57,595
Like them. Yes.
713
00:50:57,763 --> 00:51:01,307
Can see everything from here.
Very good.
714
00:51:08,399 --> 00:51:11,943
- Ready to go?
- Yeah, yeah, sure, sure. Riot.
715
00:51:13,946 --> 00:51:17,157
Ladies and gentlemen...
716
00:51:17,324 --> 00:51:21,786
...the starting lineup for the Tune Squad.
717
00:51:23,873 --> 00:51:29,210
Standing 2-foot-4,
The Wonder From Down Under...
718
00:51:29,378 --> 00:51:32,797
...the Tazmanian Devil.
719
00:51:36,427 --> 00:51:42,307
At small forward,
standing a scintillating 3-foot-2...
720
00:51:42,475 --> 00:51:47,771
...The Heartthrob of the Hoops,
Lola Bunny.
721
00:51:50,649 --> 00:51:56,529
At power forward,
The Quackster of the Courts, Daffy Duck.
722
00:51:56,697 --> 00:51:58,615
Thank you. Thank you.
723
00:52:01,535 --> 00:52:05,205
Very funny. Let's all laugh at the duck.
724
00:52:05,372 --> 00:52:11,503
And at point guard, standing 3-foot-3,
4 feet if you include the ears...
725
00:52:11,670 --> 00:52:15,590
...co-captain of the Tune Squad...
726
00:52:15,758 --> 00:52:18,885
...The Doctor of Delight, Bugs Bunny.
727
00:52:19,053 --> 00:52:20,720
Thank you. Thank you.
728
00:52:23,265 --> 00:52:27,811
And now,
the player-coach of the Tune Squad...
729
00:52:28,437 --> 00:52:31,606
...at 6-foot-6, from North Carolina...
730
00:52:31,774 --> 00:52:38,363
...His Royal Airness, Michael Jordan.
731
00:52:41,575 --> 00:52:43,993
Who? Is he a Looney Tune?
732
00:52:44,161 --> 00:52:46,246
Uh... Uh, well, perhaps.
733
00:52:49,750 --> 00:52:52,293
- You guys ready?
- I'm set to take it to the rack, Jack.
734
00:52:52,461 --> 00:52:54,838
Those Monstars
will wish they'd never been born.
735
00:52:55,005 --> 00:52:57,841
- Guys, let's just go out and have fun.
Yeah!
736
00:52:58,008 --> 00:53:01,427
The challengers for the Ultimate Game...
737
00:53:01,595 --> 00:53:05,181
...all the way from Moron Mountain:
738
00:53:05,349 --> 00:53:11,145
The Monstars.
739
00:53:14,024 --> 00:53:16,901
Go Monstars! Go Monstars!
Go Monstars!
740
00:53:25,119 --> 00:53:27,287
What are you looking at?
741
00:53:34,962 --> 00:53:36,671
Cool shoes.
742
00:53:38,632 --> 00:53:40,216
Uh...
743
00:53:40,885 --> 00:53:42,302
Ready?
744
00:53:47,725 --> 00:53:50,143
I got it, I got it, I got it.
I got the ball. I got the ball.
745
00:53:50,311 --> 00:53:51,811
Yipe!
746
00:53:52,313 --> 00:53:53,354
Ooh.
747
00:53:58,944 --> 00:54:01,863
Way to go, boys.
Did you see the moves on that one?
748
00:54:02,656 --> 00:54:06,159
Come on, show me something.
Come on, show me something.
749
00:54:09,330 --> 00:54:11,080
- Whoops.
- The duck.
750
00:54:11,248 --> 00:54:13,458
Yeah, beat up on the duck.
751
00:54:18,672 --> 00:54:20,089
Oh, my.
752
00:54:20,257 --> 00:54:22,342
She was wide open.
753
00:54:33,228 --> 00:54:35,521
Watch it, coming your way.
Watch out, watch out.
754
00:54:36,857 --> 00:54:37,899
Get him.
755
00:54:42,863 --> 00:54:44,822
How did he do that?
756
00:54:46,116 --> 00:54:49,035
- Nice shot, Mr. J.
- Hey, hey, come on. Get back on defense.
757
00:54:50,829 --> 00:54:52,372
Way to go!
758
00:54:52,539 --> 00:54:53,790
Air J! Air J!
759
00:54:56,251 --> 00:54:57,293
Red light.
760
00:54:57,461 --> 00:55:01,381
- Feed me. Feed me.
- Feed you? Feed me.
761
00:55:04,885 --> 00:55:07,345
- Bad old putty tat.
I'll take that, thank you.
762
00:55:08,472 --> 00:55:11,057
Don't try this at home.
763
00:55:12,142 --> 00:55:14,310
I wish I was in the land of cott...
764
00:55:14,478 --> 00:55:16,145
You going somewhere?
765
00:55:16,313 --> 00:55:20,900
May I remind you, sir, that physical
violence is patently against the rules.
766
00:55:21,068 --> 00:55:26,614
Yeow! Did you order Original Recipe
or Extra Crispy?
767
00:55:30,327 --> 00:55:32,120
- Let's go.
- Me?
768
00:55:32,287 --> 00:55:35,665
- Oh, boy. I'm ready. I can do this.
- The mouse? You picked the mouse?
769
00:55:35,833 --> 00:55:38,126
- I love basketball. I always have. Do you?
- Uh-huh.
770
00:55:38,293 --> 00:55:40,420
- You're big. I bet you're good.
- Right.
771
00:55:40,587 --> 00:55:42,213
I'm small, but I'll try hard to be good.
772
00:55:42,381 --> 00:55:44,882
- Okay. Yeah.
- Really, I will. I always try hard.
773
00:55:45,050 --> 00:55:47,385
My mom says,
"Try your best at everything you do..."
774
00:55:47,553 --> 00:55:49,178
Oh!
775
00:55:50,639 --> 00:55:52,807
Try to get by me, doll.
776
00:55:52,975 --> 00:55:54,642
"Doll"?
777
00:55:59,314 --> 00:56:02,108
Don't ever call me "doll."
778
00:56:02,276 --> 00:56:03,943
- Nice shot.
- Thanks, Bugs.
779
00:56:04,111 --> 00:56:05,278
Hmm?
780
00:56:05,446 --> 00:56:08,406
Where's the defense, boy?
I got you right here.
781
00:56:09,241 --> 00:56:11,409
911.
782
00:56:11,577 --> 00:56:14,704
Piece of pie? Pork chop?
Some sorbet, perhaps?
783
00:56:31,221 --> 00:56:32,263
Half-time.
784
00:56:34,725 --> 00:56:36,100
Holy putty tat.
785
00:56:37,853 --> 00:56:40,229
Yeah, man, we got it going on.
One more half.
786
00:56:40,397 --> 00:56:42,106
Right, man. We got them.
787
00:56:42,274 --> 00:56:44,442
Moron Mountain, here we come.
788
00:56:44,610 --> 00:56:46,611
We're gonna be slaves.
789
00:56:46,779 --> 00:56:49,989
Come on, guys, keep your head up.
Got a whole other half to play.
790
00:57:03,962 --> 00:57:06,130
It's the boss.
791
00:57:06,298 --> 00:57:08,925
Hello, Mr. Swackhammer.
792
00:57:09,093 --> 00:57:10,593
All right.
793
00:57:10,761 --> 00:57:14,180
Not bad for the first half,
but we gotta keep this up.
794
00:57:14,348 --> 00:57:15,515
No problem. We stole...
795
00:57:15,682 --> 00:57:17,975
We stole talent from the best players
in the NBA.
796
00:57:18,143 --> 00:57:20,269
From the NBA.
797
00:57:22,147 --> 00:57:23,523
Shut up.
798
00:57:24,900 --> 00:57:26,859
I smell something.
799
00:57:28,362 --> 00:57:30,488
Uh, we have been playing really hard.
800
00:57:30,656 --> 00:57:32,990
- Yeah.
- Not you, you idiot.
801
00:57:35,119 --> 00:57:37,537
It's coming from over here.
802
00:57:37,704 --> 00:57:38,746
That locker.
803
00:57:41,959 --> 00:57:43,584
- Look.
- Aah!
804
00:57:43,752 --> 00:57:46,838
- It's the chubby boy.
- Ah.
805
00:57:47,005 --> 00:57:50,800
It smells like a spy.
806
00:57:53,262 --> 00:57:56,722
You guys need a publicist?
I can make you big. Ha, ha.
807
00:57:57,015 --> 00:57:59,142
- I know we're down.
Yeah. Let's hear the story.
808
00:57:59,309 --> 00:58:01,519
But I've been in this situation
many times before.
809
00:58:01,687 --> 00:58:05,022
We can still win this thing.
It's not over with. We gotta come together.
810
00:58:05,190 --> 00:58:07,233
We gotta believe in ourselves.
We can win this game.
811
00:58:07,401 --> 00:58:08,985
Yeah, right. That's gonna help us.
812
00:58:12,573 --> 00:58:15,741
Looks like Stan just had
a close encounter with a bug-zapper.
813
00:58:16,910 --> 00:58:19,954
Monstars. The Monstars.
814
00:58:23,834 --> 00:58:26,502
Ooh. That's gotta hurt.
- You all right, Stan?
815
00:58:26,670 --> 00:58:28,421
The Monst...
816
00:58:28,881 --> 00:58:33,134
The Monstars stole the talent
from the NBA players.
817
00:58:36,763 --> 00:58:38,764
So that's what happened to those guys.
818
00:58:38,932 --> 00:58:42,685
I think we should qui... Forfeit.
819
00:58:42,853 --> 00:58:44,729
ALL: Yeah.
- I didn't get dragged down here...
820
00:58:44,897 --> 00:58:47,607
...just to get my butt whipped
by a bunch of ugly Monstars.
821
00:58:47,774 --> 00:58:50,651
I ain't going out like that.
We're letting them push us around.
822
00:58:52,154 --> 00:58:55,948
We gotta fight them back. We gotta take it
to them. We gotta get right in their faces.
823
00:58:57,409 --> 00:58:59,118
What do you say?
824
00:58:59,703 --> 00:59:01,746
Are you with me or not?
825
00:59:07,127 --> 00:59:10,296
Finished? Great speech and all, doc.
You had them riveted.
826
00:59:10,464 --> 00:59:13,424
- But, uh, didn't you forget something?
- What?
827
00:59:14,134 --> 00:59:16,093
Your secret stuff.
828
00:59:23,685 --> 00:59:24,810
Wow.
829
00:59:25,145 --> 00:59:27,104
Whoa, nice deltoids.
830
00:59:27,272 --> 00:59:28,981
Play along.
831
00:59:30,234 --> 00:59:33,152
Uh, stop hogging it, Mike.
We're your teammates.
832
00:59:33,320 --> 00:59:35,988
Secret stuff?
833
00:59:36,156 --> 00:59:39,909
Secret stuff?
- You wouldn't hold out on us, would you?
834
00:59:40,077 --> 00:59:42,161
No, I mean,
I didn't think you guys really needed it.
835
00:59:42,329 --> 00:59:45,289
I mean, you're so tough.
You're competitive.
836
00:59:45,457 --> 00:59:49,502
We're also chicken, son. We need it bad.
- Hey.
837
00:59:49,670 --> 00:59:52,046
- Uh, I'd like some of that.
Could I have a sip, please?
838
00:59:52,214 --> 00:59:55,925
You know, this goes against everything
they taught me in health class.
839
00:59:56,677 --> 00:59:57,885
Do you want to win or not?
840
00:59:58,053 --> 01:00:00,054
Bottoms up.
841
01:00:01,890 --> 01:00:02,932
- Yummy.
- All right.
842
01:00:03,100 --> 01:00:05,851
How about we go out
and kick some alien butt, huh? Let's go.
843
01:00:06,019 --> 01:00:09,355
- How about it? Ready?
Yeah!
844
01:00:31,503 --> 01:00:33,212
Coming through.
845
01:00:35,382 --> 01:00:36,632
Bugs.
846
01:00:37,884 --> 01:00:38,926
Special delivery.
847
01:00:43,807 --> 01:00:44,849
Boo!
848
01:00:51,064 --> 01:00:54,191
Eh, nice kaboom, Wile E.
849
01:01:09,750 --> 01:01:12,126
Let's teach them a lesson.
850
01:01:17,257 --> 01:01:18,674
Nice butt.
851
01:01:27,142 --> 01:01:29,018
Going up.
You're mine, fool.
852
01:01:31,146 --> 01:01:32,646
Slammy.
853
01:01:34,649 --> 01:01:37,234
Hello.
A little surprise for you, my friends.
854
01:01:43,450 --> 01:01:44,617
Two points.
855
01:01:54,086 --> 01:01:56,754
Ooh. This will be good.
856
01:02:09,017 --> 01:02:10,726
- Okay, birdie.
- Uh-oh.
857
01:02:27,577 --> 01:02:29,578
Yes!
- Time out!
858
01:02:33,875 --> 01:02:36,585
Shut up, you little bug.
Get away from me. Powwow.
859
01:02:36,753 --> 01:02:40,506
All right. We're right back in this game.
Come on, now. Let's play tough defense.
860
01:02:40,674 --> 01:02:42,091
Why didn't you get this guy?
861
01:02:42,676 --> 01:02:45,636
He's a baseball player.
- Yeah, boss, a baseball player.
862
01:02:45,804 --> 01:02:48,222
Looks like a basketball player to me.
863
01:02:48,390 --> 01:02:50,141
Yeah, me too.
864
01:02:50,308 --> 01:02:53,853
- He's the one I want for Moron Mountain.
- Hey.
865
01:02:55,730 --> 01:02:57,773
Are you talking to me?
866
01:02:57,941 --> 01:03:01,152
Yeah, I'm talking to you.
You want a piece of me? Come and get it.
867
01:03:02,779 --> 01:03:04,155
Uh-oh.
868
01:03:05,073 --> 01:03:06,657
What did you have in mind?
869
01:03:07,909 --> 01:03:10,077
Hat about we raise the stakes
a little bit?
870
01:03:10,245 --> 01:03:11,704
Hmm.
871
01:03:12,122 --> 01:03:13,706
Interesting.
872
01:03:13,874 --> 01:03:17,001
If we win, you give the NBA
players their talent back.
873
01:03:17,169 --> 01:03:19,128
But what if we win?
874
01:03:20,547 --> 01:03:22,256
- If you win?
- Uh-huh.
875
01:03:22,883 --> 01:03:23,883
You get me.
876
01:03:24,050 --> 01:03:25,134
Good deal, boss.
877
01:03:25,635 --> 01:03:27,636
Doc, you think that's a good ide...?
878
01:03:30,974 --> 01:03:33,225
You'll be our star attraction.
879
01:03:34,561 --> 01:03:37,146
You'll sign autographs all day long.
880
01:03:38,565 --> 01:03:41,192
And play one-on-one
with the paying customers.
881
01:03:44,070 --> 01:03:46,822
And you'll always lose.
882
01:03:48,492 --> 01:03:50,743
Do we have a deal?
883
01:03:54,247 --> 01:03:55,915
Deal.
884
01:03:56,082 --> 01:03:57,124
All right.
885
01:04:01,963 --> 01:04:04,465
I don't think you should have
done that, doc.
886
01:04:04,633 --> 01:04:06,300
I have faith in my team.
887
01:04:08,345 --> 01:04:09,386
Crush them.
888
01:04:11,348 --> 01:04:13,098
Feeding time, boys.
889
01:04:20,398 --> 01:04:21,607
Goodbye.
890
01:04:29,115 --> 01:04:30,157
Fore.
891
01:04:35,956 --> 01:04:39,291
But, Mommy,
I don't want to go to school today.
892
01:04:40,377 --> 01:04:45,130
I want to stay home
and bake cookies with you.
893
01:04:47,425 --> 01:04:49,843
I'm open, I'm open.
- Lola, Lola, heads up.
894
01:04:50,345 --> 01:04:52,513
Oh!
Belly flop.
895
01:04:55,517 --> 01:04:57,059
Oh, my. Bugs!
896
01:04:57,936 --> 01:05:00,145
- Bugs!
- Is this your man?
897
01:05:01,982 --> 01:05:03,399
Are you okay?
898
01:05:03,567 --> 01:05:05,776
Me? Oh, yeah. I'm fine.
899
01:05:05,944 --> 01:05:07,611
Are you okay?
900
01:05:07,779 --> 01:05:09,989
Oh, Bugs. Thank you.
901
01:05:10,156 --> 01:05:11,907
Aw, it was nothing.
902
01:05:12,617 --> 01:05:16,662
That was the nicest thing anyone's
ever done for me.
903
01:05:21,126 --> 01:05:22,167
Time out.
904
01:05:25,839 --> 01:05:28,674
I could have been a contender.
905
01:05:28,842 --> 01:05:30,593
The Monstars. The Monstars.
906
01:05:30,760 --> 01:05:33,470
I could have had a...
- Clear!
907
01:05:48,320 --> 01:05:49,695
Okay.
908
01:05:51,197 --> 01:05:54,033
- We need a fifth player.
- Hey, coach, listen.
909
01:05:54,200 --> 01:05:57,411
You got any more secret stuff?
I think it's starting to wear off.
910
01:05:57,579 --> 01:05:59,955
It didn't wear off. It was just water.
911
01:06:00,123 --> 01:06:02,833
You guys had the special stuff
inside of you all along.
912
01:06:03,668 --> 01:06:06,211
Yeah, yeah, I knew that.
But listen, you got any more?
913
01:06:06,463 --> 01:06:09,965
I'll take some.
Yeah, uh, can I have some too?
914
01:06:11,343 --> 01:06:12,718
- Stan?
- Me?
915
01:06:14,304 --> 01:06:16,013
You're in at center.
916
01:06:16,181 --> 01:06:17,556
Just guard the big guy, okay?
917
01:06:17,724 --> 01:06:20,059
Guard him? Guard him? I'll smother him.
918
01:06:20,226 --> 01:06:24,396
I'll be all over him like a cheap suit.
I'll be on him like stink on rice.
919
01:06:24,564 --> 01:06:25,856
I tell you, he's going down.
920
01:06:32,739 --> 01:06:35,741
Michael, over here. Over here.
Over here, I'm open.
921
01:06:44,459 --> 01:06:45,751
Yes!
922
01:06:47,796 --> 01:06:49,380
Ha, ha. Nice sho...!
923
01:06:49,547 --> 01:06:52,383
Big man pancake.
924
01:06:53,677 --> 01:06:54,843
Ooh.
925
01:06:57,555 --> 01:06:59,765
Let's get him out of here.
926
01:07:19,953 --> 01:07:21,704
Eew.
927
01:07:22,789 --> 01:07:24,248
Oh, my.
928
01:07:31,297 --> 01:07:32,506
How'd he do that?
929
01:07:32,674 --> 01:07:35,467
Aw, anybody could do that, doc.
Even you.
930
01:07:35,635 --> 01:07:37,803
Watch this.
931
01:07:38,179 --> 01:07:41,098
No sweat. This is Looney Tune Land.
932
01:07:44,644 --> 01:07:47,938
Ten seconds to go?
Thanks for telling me, doc.
933
01:07:48,106 --> 01:07:51,483
I hate to be the bearer of bad news,
Your Airness...
934
01:07:51,651 --> 01:07:56,196
...but if you don't find a fifth player,
your team will forfeit the game.
935
01:07:56,364 --> 01:07:58,991
- Forfeit?
- Precisely, Sir Altitude.
936
01:07:59,367 --> 01:08:01,201
No way. We'll find someone.
937
01:08:06,249 --> 01:08:07,332
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
938
01:08:07,500 --> 01:08:09,710
I didn't know Dan Aykroyd
was in this picture.
939
01:08:10,253 --> 01:08:11,670
Hey.
940
01:08:12,338 --> 01:08:14,923
Perhaps I could be of some assistance.
941
01:08:15,884 --> 01:08:17,676
That's our fifth guy.
942
01:08:17,844 --> 01:08:20,596
Thanks, Bill.
Now you get to live your dream. Let's go.
943
01:08:20,764 --> 01:08:22,556
- All right.
- All right.
944
01:08:22,724 --> 01:08:25,058
- We need to score two points...
- Here's how I see it.
945
01:08:25,226 --> 01:08:26,310
- Duck.
- Yes.
946
01:08:26,478 --> 01:08:29,354
- Kick it to the girl bunny down in the post.
Yeah?
947
01:08:29,522 --> 01:08:31,523
- You dish it back to the guy bunny.
- Got it.
948
01:08:31,691 --> 01:08:34,193
- You swing it to Mike. You go to the hole.
- Bill.
949
01:08:34,360 --> 01:08:36,361
- And dominate.
- We're on defense.
950
01:08:36,529 --> 01:08:39,948
- Oh, yeah.
- Whoa. I don't play defense.
951
01:08:40,116 --> 01:08:42,326
- Typical.
- Gonna have to listen to Mike on this.
952
01:08:42,494 --> 01:08:47,164
Okay. Somebody steal the ball, get it to me
and I'll score before the time runs out.
953
01:08:47,999 --> 01:08:49,833
Don't lose that confidence. Okay.
954
01:08:50,001 --> 01:08:52,544
- Paws and wings in here. Okay.
Yes!
955
01:08:58,593 --> 01:09:00,594
This is why I was born.
956
01:09:00,762 --> 01:09:02,596
I thrive on pressure.
957
01:09:02,764 --> 01:09:06,308
- Excuse me, uh, sorry.
- Yo, yo, easy on the trousers, Daf. Easy.
958
01:09:06,476 --> 01:09:09,895
Pardon me. Mr. Murray,
something's really been bugging me.
959
01:09:10,063 --> 01:09:12,815
- Yeah?
- Just how did you get here anyway?
960
01:09:14,234 --> 01:09:17,277
Producer's a friend of mine.
Just had a teamster come and drop me off.
961
01:09:17,445 --> 01:09:19,071
Uh-huh.
962
01:09:19,239 --> 01:09:20,405
Well, that's how it goes.
963
01:09:21,157 --> 01:09:23,659
Hey, you see this, uh, kind of chunky
fellow over here?
964
01:09:25,411 --> 01:09:26,870
Uh-huh.
965
01:09:29,123 --> 01:09:32,543
- Oh. Oh, that's good. Oh, yes.
- Let's do it. You the duck.
966
01:09:32,794 --> 01:09:35,712
Now, let's all play fair. Here.
967
01:09:35,880 --> 01:09:37,798
Yo, spaceman. Don't choke now.
Come on.
968
01:09:37,966 --> 01:09:40,133
It's gut-check time.
969
01:09:43,888 --> 01:09:46,223
This must be mine. Woo-hoo!
970
01:09:46,391 --> 01:09:49,518
This belongs to me.
I'm going this way. I'm going left.
971
01:09:49,686 --> 01:09:52,312
Whoa! Don't ever trust an Earthling.
972
01:09:55,483 --> 01:09:56,525
Mike!
973
01:09:57,694 --> 01:10:00,112
Get the rabbit. Get the girl.
974
01:10:00,280 --> 01:10:01,822
Come on, come on. I'm open.
975
01:10:02,448 --> 01:10:03,448
I'm op...!
976
01:10:04,075 --> 01:10:05,909
- That's mine.
- Not today.
977
01:10:06,411 --> 01:10:08,871
Hey.
Bring it on, dude.
978
01:10:09,038 --> 01:10:11,456
BILL:
Whoopsie-daisy.
979
01:10:12,584 --> 01:10:14,251
You're mine.
980
01:10:22,677 --> 01:10:24,011
Mike, I'm open!
981
01:10:26,431 --> 01:10:27,598
Never mind.
982
01:11:02,926 --> 01:11:04,718
The Tunes win!
983
01:11:10,099 --> 01:11:11,308
That was a nice pass, man.
984
01:11:11,476 --> 01:11:13,602
That was a great stretch
for the basket too.
985
01:11:13,770 --> 01:11:17,522
You know, you really got some skills.
You might be able to play in the NBA.
986
01:11:18,232 --> 01:11:20,943
Thanks, Mike.
I'll probably quote you on that.
987
01:11:21,110 --> 01:11:24,196
But I'm gonna take this opportunity
to retire from the game.
988
01:11:24,364 --> 01:11:25,989
- No, come on.
- No.
989
01:11:26,157 --> 01:11:28,408
No, I'm gonna retire right now.
That's all there is to it.
990
01:11:28,576 --> 01:11:31,203
I'm gonna go out on top,
undefeated and untied.
991
01:11:31,371 --> 01:11:32,788
That's the way it's gonna be.
992
01:11:32,956 --> 01:11:35,457
- You go celebrate with your team.
- Come help us, man.
993
01:11:35,625 --> 01:11:40,462
I'd like to, but I have to ice down my knees
right away, okay? They're starting to go.
994
01:11:40,630 --> 01:11:43,340
- All right. Goodbye, man.
- All right, see you.
995
01:11:44,884 --> 01:11:48,553
- Are you sure?
- Yes. Definitely sure. Definitely.
996
01:11:49,514 --> 01:11:51,014
- Losers.
Sorry.
997
01:11:51,182 --> 01:11:52,808
- Choke artists.
- Sorry again.
998
01:11:52,976 --> 01:11:55,852
Wait till I get you back
on Moron Mountain.
999
01:11:57,230 --> 01:12:00,482
All right. The party's over.
Get in the spaceship.
1000
01:12:00,650 --> 01:12:02,234
Why do you take it from this guy?
1001
01:12:02,402 --> 01:12:04,736
Because he's bigger.
1002
01:12:04,904 --> 01:12:06,196
He's bigger?
1003
01:12:06,364 --> 01:12:08,907
Than we used to be.
1004
01:12:10,243 --> 01:12:11,660
What are you doing?
1005
01:12:12,620 --> 01:12:15,205
- Wait. What are you doing? Wait.
Come here.
1006
01:12:31,305 --> 01:12:33,306
Had it in you all the time, didn't you?
1007
01:12:35,435 --> 01:12:38,186
One thing, though.
Pass me the ball, Bugs.
1008
01:12:38,354 --> 01:12:40,105
You gotta give my friends
their talent back.
1009
01:12:40,940 --> 01:12:42,816
Do we have to?
1010
01:12:42,984 --> 01:12:45,569
Yeah, it's part of the deal.
Touch the ball.
1011
01:12:47,447 --> 01:12:49,740
Oh, okay.
1012
01:12:49,907 --> 01:12:52,743
Fair is fair.
- There you go. Touch it.
1013
01:12:59,792 --> 01:13:01,460
That was so much fun.
1014
01:13:01,627 --> 01:13:04,212
I feel so insignificant.
1015
01:13:04,380 --> 01:13:06,131
My clothes don't fit.
1016
01:13:06,299 --> 01:13:08,717
- What a trip.
- Ha, ha. I'm up for another one.
1017
01:13:08,885 --> 01:13:11,386
Can we ask you a favor, Mr. Bunny?
1018
01:13:11,554 --> 01:13:13,722
We don't want to go back
to Moron Mountain.
1019
01:13:13,890 --> 01:13:16,933
- We hate it up there.
- It stinks.
1020
01:13:17,101 --> 01:13:20,228
Um, I was thinking,
could we stay here with you?
1021
01:13:20,396 --> 01:13:22,064
Please.
1022
01:13:22,231 --> 01:13:23,690
Oh, brother.
1023
01:13:23,858 --> 01:13:26,234
Eh, I don't know if you guys
are looney enough.
1024
01:13:26,402 --> 01:13:27,819
Looney enough?
1025
01:13:34,952 --> 01:13:36,703
Michael, do you know what time it is?
1026
01:13:36,871 --> 01:13:40,123
Seven-fift... Seven-fift... Quarter past 7.
1027
01:13:40,291 --> 01:13:43,001
Exactly. You've got a baseball game
in five minutes.
1028
01:13:43,169 --> 01:13:45,045
Okay. Take this.
1029
01:13:46,172 --> 01:13:48,799
- Is it safe?
- Yeah, put it in my bag.
1030
01:13:48,966 --> 01:13:51,384
Okay. Let's go.
1031
01:13:51,552 --> 01:13:53,428
I really enjoyed playing with you guys.
1032
01:13:53,596 --> 01:13:55,180
You guys got a lot of, uh...
1033
01:13:56,349 --> 01:13:57,891
- A lot of, uh...
Yes?
1034
01:13:58,059 --> 01:14:00,227
Well, whatever it is, you got a lot of it.
1035
01:14:02,939 --> 01:14:04,856
All right. Gotta go.
1036
01:14:05,399 --> 01:14:07,025
- Bugs.
- Eh, Mike.
1037
01:14:07,193 --> 01:14:10,737
- Stay out of trouble.
- You know I will.
1038
01:14:10,905 --> 01:14:12,697
Come here.
1039
01:14:14,700 --> 01:14:16,201
Woo-hoo!
1040
01:14:16,577 --> 01:14:19,121
We want Michael! We want Michael!
1041
01:14:19,789 --> 01:14:23,083
The delay is killing us. Where's Michael?
1042
01:14:23,251 --> 01:14:24,876
Where is Michael?
1043
01:14:25,044 --> 01:14:27,045
Oh, he's not back from his other game.
1044
01:14:27,213 --> 01:14:29,005
- What other game?
- Shh.
1045
01:14:29,715 --> 01:14:31,091
Uh-uh. What other game?
1046
01:15:05,251 --> 01:15:07,460
Ladies and gentlemen...
1047
01:15:10,423 --> 01:15:12,132
...Michael Jordan.
1048
01:15:29,734 --> 01:15:32,569
Guys, we suck.
1049
01:15:32,737 --> 01:15:35,363
Yeah, man.
My grandmother plays better than I do.
1050
01:15:35,531 --> 01:15:39,242
At least you guys are still tall.
I'm nothing now. Just another short guy.
1051
01:15:39,410 --> 01:15:42,787
- You got that right.
- That's the only thing you got right.
1052
01:15:46,292 --> 01:15:47,375
- Who's that?
- Who's that?
1053
01:15:47,543 --> 01:15:50,212
I don't know.
- Been getting your butts kicked?
1054
01:15:50,379 --> 01:15:51,630
Who's that?
- It's Mike.
1055
01:15:51,797 --> 01:15:53,131
- What's up?
- Why are you here?
1056
01:15:53,299 --> 01:15:56,801
Don't be embarrassed. Just face it.
1057
01:15:56,969 --> 01:15:57,969
You guys stink.
1058
01:15:58,137 --> 01:16:00,931
- Come on, Mike. Lighten up.
- I know, man.
1059
01:16:01,098 --> 01:16:04,100
You want your games back, huh?
What little games you had to begin with.
1060
01:16:04,518 --> 01:16:07,103
- It's hard enough as it is, Mike.
- Give us a break.
1061
01:16:08,064 --> 01:16:09,856
I'm gonna regret this.
1062
01:16:11,108 --> 01:16:12,984
Stan, give me the ball.
1063
01:16:15,488 --> 01:16:16,905
Oh.
1064
01:16:17,281 --> 01:16:18,865
Look at that.
1065
01:16:19,033 --> 01:16:21,159
Looks like something from Star Trek.
1066
01:16:22,161 --> 01:16:25,121
- Touch it.
- No way, Jose.
1067
01:16:25,289 --> 01:16:28,917
Pat, you want your talent back?
You don't have any choice. Just touch it.
1068
01:16:29,794 --> 01:16:31,419
- I don't know.
- Don't touch it.
1069
01:16:31,587 --> 01:16:34,798
You're gonna walk around with a bad game
for the rest of your career.
1070
01:16:34,966 --> 01:16:36,633
Touch the ball.
1071
01:16:37,426 --> 01:16:39,386
Careful, Pat.
1072
01:16:41,138 --> 01:16:42,597
We've tried everything else.
1073
01:16:53,859 --> 01:16:56,695
Come on, Charles. Touch it.
1074
01:16:56,862 --> 01:16:59,447
The rest of you guys. Just touch it.
1075
01:17:05,579 --> 01:17:08,164
- What was that?
- I liked that, Mike.
1076
01:17:08,332 --> 01:17:10,250
Hey, I caught it.
1077
01:17:10,710 --> 01:17:13,128
Look at Muggsy handle the rock.
Handle it, baby.
1078
01:17:13,296 --> 01:17:16,423
- I can handle that rock again.
That's the old Muggs I know.
1079
01:17:16,590 --> 01:17:18,758
Yeah, get height now.
1080
01:17:19,010 --> 01:17:21,219
It gave me my powers back.
1081
01:17:21,387 --> 01:17:24,055
That wasn't bad.
Let me show you something.
1082
01:17:25,474 --> 01:17:28,351
- The Round Mound is back.
- Want to see something?
1083
01:17:30,062 --> 01:17:32,897
Oh, man. That felt good.
1084
01:17:35,151 --> 01:17:37,027
I got it.
You got it. Yeah, baby.
1085
01:17:37,194 --> 01:17:41,114
Hey, Michael. Why don't you stay,
play some three-on-three with us?
1086
01:17:41,282 --> 01:17:43,616
No, I don't think so.
1087
01:17:43,784 --> 01:17:45,744
You gonna work on that baseball swing?
1088
01:17:45,911 --> 01:17:49,914
Leave the baseball player alone.
He doesn't play basketball anymore.
1089
01:17:50,082 --> 01:17:52,250
He probably doesn't even
have it anymore, guys.
1090
01:17:52,418 --> 01:17:54,210
Michael, do you hear them?
1091
01:17:54,378 --> 01:17:57,213
They don't think
you can play the game anymore.
1092
01:18:00,801 --> 01:18:02,510
There's only one way to find out.
1093
01:18:06,932 --> 01:18:10,268
The Chicago Bulls welcome back...
1094
01:18:10,436 --> 01:18:15,523
...Michael Jordan!
1095
01:18:27,078 --> 01:18:29,287
What's the matter, Bill?
1096
01:18:31,374 --> 01:18:33,583
Larry, that could have been me.
1097
01:18:33,751 --> 01:18:38,630
Will you get off that kick?
It's over. It's done with. You can't play.
1098
01:18:41,675 --> 01:18:43,134
Okay.
1099
01:18:44,053 --> 01:18:46,429
Let's go, Bulls.
1100
01:26:54,334 --> 01:26:56,627
Well, that's all, folks.
1101
01:26:56,795 --> 01:26:59,005
That's my line.
1102
01:26:59,172 --> 01:27:02,300
Step aside, babe. Let a star do this.
1103
01:27:02,467 --> 01:27:03,968
That's all...
1104
01:27:04,136 --> 01:27:06,637
That's all, folks.
1105
01:27:07,639 --> 01:27:09,807
Can I go home now?
82316
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