Original subtitles

Come and knock on our door. Come and knock on our door.

We've been waiting for you.

We've been waiting for you. Where the kisses are heard and heard and hid.

come for you too.

Come and dance on our floor. Come and dance on our floor. Take a step that is

new. Take a step that is new.

We've all of us will stay. We'll be

right

back.

Hey, Terry, there was a bottle of Chablis in the cupboard.

Oh, yeah, it was very good.

You drank it?

Well, you know, I mean, Jan and I were making plans for honeymoon and... Great,

I bought it for Vicki's father.

She's bringing him with her tonight.

Her father?

Has he been going along on all your dates? Terry, she's bringing him over

because he and I didn't exactly...

hit it off the first time we met. Oh, yeah?

Vicki figures once he gets to know me, he'll see how lovable I really am.

Should have bought a case of bourbon.

Aren't you funny?

Pillow girl.

Oh, I don't believe him. I don't believe that man.

Who? Philip, that's who.

What's wrong, Janet?

He doesn't want to have a church wedding.

So? So.

Perry, do you know what that means?

He's Jewish?

Jack, that's what I've always dreamed about. A church wedding with organ music

and flower girls and me wearing this long white wedding gown.

And Phil doesn't want that? Well, he found out it would take months to

the church and he doesn't want to wait that long.

That little devil.

Look, Janet, is a church wedding that important to you?

Important?

Jack, I have waited so long for this.

Longer than most.

Janet, Janet, let me ask you something.

Do you really love Philip?

Of course I love him. Then what difference does it make where you get

You're lucky enough to find someone you love. The important thing is that you're

together, isn't it?

have to be City Hall.

That's right. Hey, listen.

You and Philip could get married right here.

You mean in our apartment? Why not?

We can get a minister, flowers, decorations, and everything. You know

We could even invite Philip. What the heck?

Oh, I love it. I do. It sounds great. I'll go ask Philip and see if he likes

idea. If he doesn't, we'll get someone else. Not for me, you won't.

Come on in.

Is my father here yet? No, not yet. Good.

Oh,

very good.

Vicki, don't get old. Your dad's going to come through that door any minute.

You're right. You're right. I better go change. Where can I am? Right in there.

Okay.

And, Jack, don't worry about my father. He'll do fine.

Hey, who's worried?

Come on.

He's coming to see me. This is my ballpark, so what's to worry?

A touch more comfortable over there.

Thank you.

I wonder what's keeping my daughter. Oh, she's in my bedroom.

Getting dressed.

Changed. Out of her uniform and into something more comfortable.

Would you like some wine?

Thank you.

None for me.

My ulcer.

No, you had an ulcer? Came on suddenly about two weeks ago.

See, that's about the time Vicki and I started seeing each... Look, Mr.

Bradford, I realize that we didn't exactly hit it off the first... I just

thought maybe we could, you know, start over.

Well, I suppose I could try, for Victoria's sake.

Oh, good. Well, I think that the...

means a lot to me.

I was both mother and father to her since she was an infant.

Well, you must have had a tremendous clothing bill.

Sorry.

No.

No, that was very amusing.

As I was saying, Victoria was always my favorite.

Well, I thought Vicki was an only child.

I meant between her and her mother.

She left me, you know.

Well, you know, kids do grow up.

I meant her mother.

I always had such high hopes for Victoria.

Ah, well.

I really don't think Vicki's doing too badly.

No,

I mean with her job.

Oh.

Oh, you mean because of the promotion they offered her.

What promotion?

She didn't tell you?

No.

Oh, well, it's not important now. She's going to turn it down.

Too bad, though, she's been working so hard for it these past two years.

Then why is she going to turn it down?

Well, it would mean moving to Houston, and that could cause problems between...

Us.

Well, why didn't she say anything?

I guess she didn't want to make you feel guilty.

You must have more on the ball than I thought to make her give up something

she wanted so badly.

Hi, Dad.

Darling.

How are you?

I'm just fine.

Has Jack been entertaining you?

No.

Why didn't you mention anything to me about that job offer in Houston?

Because it wasn't important.

I'm going to turn it down.

Well, shouldn't you at least consider it? I already did.

And? And I'm going to turn it down.

Oh.

Are you sure, though, you're doing the right thing?

Well, Jack, do you want me to take the job?

Well, no.

I just... I mean, you should do what's right for you.

But, Jack, if I move to Houston, we'll never see each other.

We still have weekends and holidays.

Weekends and holidays? You know, we really don't see that much of each other

it is. You're flying around all the time. I work all hours. What I'm trying

say is I want you to do what's best for you.

I will.

Dad, could you give me a lift home?

Now? Wait a minute. I thought we were going to do something. I'm sorry. I just

didn't realize how tired I was. Well, we could do something. Shall we? Vicki.

Thank you for a very pleasant evening, Jack.

Hey, listen. I'll call you tomorrow, okay?

Okay.

But if I'm not home, I'll call you.

Terry? Jack? Oh, excuse me. Jack, I just talked to Phillip, and we're going to

do it. Hi, Vicki. We're going to get...

I hope I'm not interrupting anything.

No, no, Janet, it's okay.

I was just leaving.

Good night.

Jack?

What happened?

Nothing.

Well, it's so early. Where's Vicky going?

To Houston.

higher, Jack.

Jack?

I'm sorry, I was someplace else. When you come back, could you lift it a

higher? Sure, Vicki.

Terry.

Don't push!

Oh, hurry it up!

This thing is heavy!

Oh,

good, the organ!

Where do you want us to put it? This thing is heavy!

Any place for now.

Okay.

Will you put it down?

And play.

Cinderella, Cinderella, all I hear is Cinderella.

Well, I understand Janet's parents can't come out to the wedding.

Yeah, Janet and Phil are going to fly back and see them afterwards.

Well, who's going to give the bride away?

I am.

You?

Then who's going to be the flower girl?

If Janet's mother isn't going to be here, who's going to talk to Janet about

whatever a young bride should know?

Mr. Furley, I wouldn't worry about it. Where is Janet?

In her bedroom. Excuse me?

Come in.

Oh, hi, Mr. Furley.

Hello, Janet.

Janet, I think it's time that you and I had a little talk.

Okay, what about?

Well, about men and women, what goes on between them when they're

married.

Come on, no questions.

I'm going to cover everything.

Now, Janet, we are living in the 80s, so I think we can be perfectly frank.

To begin with, men have certain needs.

So do women.

They do?

Of course they do, Mr. Furley.

Women are every bit as warm and passionate as men.

They are?

Yes.

Then why do they always act like they're doing me a favor?

Jack, do you think we need something else over the door?

Did you say something?

I said, why don't you just call Vicki and get it over with? Why doesn't she

me? Good question. Call her and ask her. Terry, please. I'd like to do this my

own way. Is that all right? Oh, Jack.

I hate to see you moping around like this. This is Janet's wedding day.

Yeah, you're right, Terry.

On a day as important as this, I'm not going to let some girl make me

I'm in pain.

I don't want you to start the wedding march until I cue you, Mrs. Keneal, all

right? Oh, I just love weddings, don't you?

Do you like watching train wrecks, too?

Hey, everybody, I bet that's the bridegroom.

Look who's here! Hey, Phillip!

Howdy, howdy, Jack. It's a big day, huh? You got it.

Oh, Jack, this is my best man, Tony Williams. Hi, welcome. Thank you. I'll

tell Janet you're here. Okay, great.

It's me. Can I come in?

What's the matter?

Janet, you look so beautiful.

Jack Tripper, if you make me cry, I'm going to kill you. I just wanted to tell

you Philip's out there.

Then I'm not going to kill you.

Are you happy, Janet?

Yes, Jack, I am.

But I'd be even happier if Vicki was here.

So would I.

Are you ready?

Mr. Furley, just a few minutes.

Right.

Jack, Terry, I wanted to... How many minutes? Two, three?

Mr. Furley!

Take as long as you want.

Janet, Janet, you were saying?

Oh, well, I just wanted to tell the two of you that you guys are the very best

friends.

Say how much you mean to me, Janet.

Yes, Terry?

Shut up and get married.

Listen, we're having a Vicki.

Jack, we've got to talk.

I'm sorry. I didn't know. I'll be back.

Vicki, we do have to talk, okay? Just a second. Mrs. Connell, take five. Come

on.

Oh, my God. I walked in on Janet's wedding. It's all right. It's all right.

no. I shouldn't have come here. Why did you?

To find out why you're trying to get rid of me.

Get rid of you? Yes, I thought we meant something to each other. We do.

Well, then why do you want me to take that job in Houston?

I don't want to stand in your way. I know how much that job means to you.

Where did you hear that?

From your father.

Oh, I should have known.

Oh, Jack, that job means nothing to me.

But you do.

Oh, Nick.

So, tell me what my dear sweet father said.

He told me...

Who's to give me away?

He's in the kitchen with Vicki.

She's here?

Yeah, but I don't think Jack is doing too well.

Larry, this has just gone...

to stop acting like a couple of silly kids, and I want you to make up, and I

want you to do it right now. Go on.

Well, what do you think?

I guess we better do what she says.

I think you're right.

Now that's more like it.

Janet, what are you doing standing around? You're supposed to be getting

married.

Dearly beloved, we're gathered here today in the sight of God to join

this man and this woman in holy matrimony.

Who gives this woman to be wed to this man?

Well, normally it would be Janet's father, but since he's not here... Just

I do.

I do.

The success of a marriage is not just the responsibility of the husband and

wife, but all those who love and are near to them.

This marriage should not mean the end of old friendship.

Rather than losing one another, you should feel more tightly bound than

sharing the joy and happiness.

Do you, Philip, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, to love,

and cherish, for richer or poorer, so long as you both shall live?

I do.

And do you, Janet, Take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, to love,

honor, and cherish, for richer or poorer, so long as you shall live.

I do.

May I have the ring, please?

Place this on the third finger of her left hand and repeat after me.

With this ring, I thee wed.

With this ring, I thee wed.

By the power vested in me.

By God and the state of California, I now pronounce you husband and wife.

You may kiss the bride.

better than I could have gotten.

Janet.

Larry. What can I say?

Mwah!

Wow. You know, that's the first time you ever kissed me?

And the last.

I hope you two are very happy.

You deserve it, Princess.

Oh, thank you, Larry.

much these last few days. Oh, I missed you too.

And I am never going to let you out of my sight again. Please don't.

Come here.

Vicki, will you marry me?

No.

No?

No? What do you mean, no?

I don't want to get married.

Vicki, you just said that you wanted to be with me. I do, but I don't want to be

married. I don't understand. If we're not married, how can we... We can live

together. Live together?

Yes.

Oh.

Well, uh, I... What have you got against marriage?

It scares me.

Why?

Because I lived through my parents' marriage.

And their divorce.

I used to lie awake listening to them fight.

Hey, lots of married people have fights. Not like theirs.

I don't know which was worse, when they argued or when they didn't talk at all.

I used to cry myself to sleep every night.

Hey, come on. That was...

That was a long time ago.

I still have nightmares about it.

Vicki, it won't be like that with us. We're in love.

So were my mother and father.

Until they got married.

I don't know what to say.

Say that we can live together.

Vicki, I have a little trouble with that.

Don't you think we'll be together because we want to, not because we have

know, Vicki, but it's just me. I can't do that.

Why not?

Why not?

Do I have to spell it out for you?

Yes.

Okay, I will.

Okay, listen.

There we are, right?

Living together.

Uh -huh.

The both of us.

Together.

Well, doesn't that tell you anything?

Not yet. Well, if I have to explain every little thing to you, Vicki, we're

going to be here all night.

You just can't say it, can you?

Say what?

That deep down, you're just an old -fashioned guy.

Old -fashioned me? That's a laugh.

Is that what I am?

Well, if we got married, you could cure me.

Oh, Jack, I love you very much.

But I can't marry you.

And I can't just live with you.

Well, I'd better get down to the party.

Oh,

my God, I'm too late.

Stay calm. What are you doing here? There's no reason to panic. You didn't

what you were doing. We'll have it unknown.

What are you talking about?

Don't play games with me, Victoria. When I tried to reach you on the phone here,

they told me about the wedding.

Wedding? This.

Dad, that was one of Jack's friends who got married.

Then... You're not... No.

Oh, how nice.

You've just done wonders for my ulcer. I feel so much better.

Oh, Dad.

What's wrong?

Jack and I just broke up.

Really? Really, I'm so sorry.

Oh, Dad, I feel so miserable.

Oh, that...

If he means that much to you, I'll see what I can do about patching things up.

You do that?

I just want you to be happy.

You're all I've got.

Now, where do we find this... Jack?

There's nothing you can do, Dad.

Let's go.

Don't you think you better fix your face up?

All right.

Jack,

what are you doing out here?

Vicki wants me to live with her.

Then what are you doing out here?

I asked Vicki to marry me, but she turned me down.

Why?

See, her parents got divorced, so she's afraid to get married.

And you're afraid to live with her?

No, Terry, no. It's a little more complicated than that. You just don't

understand, all right?

You were lucky enough to find someone you love, and the only thing that really

matters is that you're together.

Come on, Terry, where'd you get that from, a greeting card?

From you.

Huh? That's what you told Janet when she wanted to break up with Philip.

I said that, didn't I?

Yes, you did.

Thanks, Mary.

Let's do it. Let's live together.

Oh, Jack!

What did you say?

Oh, he said we're going to live together. I know what he said.

How could you even think of such a thing? Well, no, actually, my friend

reminded me. I didn't even say hello to you yet. Hi. Don't touch me. Don't touch

my daughter.

Dad, it wasn't his idea.

Then it was your mother.

She put you up to this, didn't she?

Dad, it's... It was my idea.

What? I had to talk Jack into it.

Uh -oh. Uh -oh. Hey.

Your ulcer is down there.

It's spreading.

Please, let me try.

Mr. Bradford, look at it this way. You're not losing a daughter. You're

a daughter.

Victoria.

Sir, if I may.

You may not.

Victoria.

Let me get this straight, just in case any of our friends happen to ask.

You'll be living in some godforsaken place with a cook, without benefit of

clergy, raising my grandchildren, who will be nameless. Dad, please.

Have I left something out? Yes, your blessing.

You noticed.

I'm happy about one thing, Victoria, that your mother lived to see this day.

Your father is real something.

Yeah.

I didn't think he'd take it so well.

What made you change your mind?

I just don't want to live without you.

for a round of hearty.

Yeah, all right. Come on, Vicki.

Thank you.

No.

Hey, you guys, how many more bags are there? Just a few.

Gee, with all three of you moving out at once, I should have rented a freight

car.

Here we are, Harry. Be careful with it, all right?

Cinderella, Cinderella.

Can you check the bathroom, Jack? Oh, my God, Terry, I'll do it right now. Okay,

thanks.

Why did you quit your job at the hospital?

I thought you liked nursing.

Oh, I'm still going to be a nurse, but someplace where I feel more useful.

Oh. You see, I've always dreamed about going off to some remote island and

tending to the needs of the poor, sick natives.

And that's what I'm going to do.

Terry, that's just beautiful.

What island?

Hawaii.

Excuse me.

Aren't you finished taping that yet? Yeah, yeah, it's ready to go.

Don't just stand there. Get the bottom half, Larry.

This is so much fun.

pictures from our honeymoon in acapulco look there's our room right there oh

yeah oh i hear the beach there is beautiful oh yeah and it's one of the

things we plan to see next time we're there

excuse me

anyway how was jack while i was gone

Crazy, Ollie kept talking about with Vicky and moving into their new

tonight. Gee, Terry, I hope she isn't going to mind living above his

Why should she? Mr.

Angelino gave them a very good deal. Oh, well, good for him. Yeah, I better get

back to work.

Oh, yeah.

Hey, Terry.

Did, um... Do you ever think that Jack would actually fall in love?

Not for more than one day.

Willie, when I think of all the... girls that he has chased over the years, I

get tired.

Me too.

Janet, did Jack ever make a path at you?

Are you kidding?

No, no, I mean a, you know, real path.

No, never.

Did he ever make a passage? No!

Okay.

A little insulting, isn't it?

Well, I'm glad someone has something to laugh about around here.

Why, Larry? What's the matter?

Well, I just hate to see you two leave, that's all.

Oh, Larry.

Yeah, in spite of all the bad things you said to me.

What bad things? Yeah, you know, things like, no, get away from me, buzz off.

And my personal favorite, over my dead body.

Larry, we have a confession to make.

We never meant those things.

Huh?

Yeah, Larry, you should have tried harder.

Come on, Larry, let's give our room a last check.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Jack.

Jack.

They were putting me on, weren't they?

Yeah. Oh, thank God.

Where am I going to find another buddy like you?

No, you're the best friend I ever had.

Oh.

You're the only friend I ever had.

Come on, pal.

I'm serious.

I don't know what I'm going to do without you.

You always pulled through for me. You were always there when I needed you.

Sorry, man. I just feel so alone. Larry.

Hey, buddy.

Listen, I'm only going to be living a mile away.

I don't care.

A mile away?

You could have told me that before I made a fool out of myself.

Yeah.

Listen, Jack, if you get lonely in that new apartment of yours... Mr. Furley,

there's something I really have to say to you.

I'm not going to be living alone.

Oh?

No, I'm... I'm going to be living...

With a girl.

A girl?

I thought you said it was a one -bedroom apartment.

It is.

This is a big step for me, Mr. Furley.

A big step?

It's a giant leap!

And I owe it all to you. To me?

Absolutely. After being around a...

macho guy like me all these years, you know, sooner or later something was

to rub off.

That makes sense.

Okay, guys, that's all cleared out. Yeah, we're all ready to go.

Well, I guess this is it.

Well, Mr. Furley, goodbye.

Don't eat too many pineapples.

Janet?

I love you, Mr. Furley.

That husband of yours is one lucky guy.

Oh, thank you.

What the hell? You're cured!

I'm the one that straightened him out, you know.

Damn.

I better get home to my husband. Oh, my goodness. I can't believe how that felt.

Oh, I know what you mean, Janet. I can't believe that in a few hours I'm going

to be with Vicki.

Well, I have a plane to catch. We

better go.

Yeah.

Oh, boy, I thought those last customers would never leave. Well, Vicki, I think

they got the hint when you turned off the lights.

Well, here we are. Yeah.

May I give you a lift? Excuse me. Going up, madam.

Well, thanks for the ride.

My pleasure.

I'll go get the bags.

I'll meet you in the bedroom.

It's the only room with furniture.

Right, yes, be right there.

Put the brown bag on the bed, honey.

Yeah, right.

What do you want me to do with this guy here?

Right here in the closet. Okay.

Well, would there be anything else, madam?

I hope so.

Wait,

wait. Right here. Don't go away. Ta

-da.

Oh, champagne. How nice.

I've been saving this for a special occasion.

And I've been saving this for a special occasion.

Beautiful. And it's a present from my mother.

I think I'm going to like your mother better than your father.

No, don't worry about my father. He won't be bothering us anymore.

Oh, no. He's got his life, and now we have ours.

Vicki, to us, may we always be as close as we are

now.

Oh, I think we'll be a lot closer than this. Oh. Oh.

Listen,

Jack, have you talked to your folks yet?

Oh, I spoke to my mother.

And? And she said, have a wonderful time.

Really? Yeah, I told her I was going on a camping trip.

Don't worry, I promise you that I'll tell my folks about us.

When? Uh, soon.

Good.

Excuse me. Were you tired?

Oh, if I ever. I had to get up at five this morning to help the girls pack, you

know, and then I went right from there to the market to do my shopping right

from there to the restaurant.

I'm exhausted.

Oh, poor Jack. Yeah.

Maybe we ought to go to bed.

So early?

It's after midnight.

It is?

Let's get to bed.

Excuse me, just one second.

Where are you going? I have to undress my teeth. Brush my teeth.

I like to look my best at all times.

Can I get you some more champagne?

No, thank you.

Coffee, tea, cocoa?

No.

You sure there's nothing I can get you? No.

Okay, then I guess it's time to hit the sack.

Thank you.

Sorry. Sorry.

Jack, can I tell you something?

Sure.

Promise you won't laugh?

This is a very special night.

Special, Vicki?

This is the most special night of my life.

Oh, Jack.

There's nothing for you to be nervous about.

You're with me.

Oh, Jack.

You're so reassuring.

Yeah, well... You just relax.

realize that you'd moved in already.

How did you get in here?

My key.

Your key?

Yes. Mr. Angelino gave it to me.

He what?

Yes, about an hour ago.

When I bought this building from him.

What? This building?

Yes.

Including the restaurant.

Say hello to your new landlord.

Three's company was videotaped in front of a studio audience.