All language subtitles for Worzel Gummidge Down Under s01e10 A Friend In Need

When a scarecrow stoops to filching the
very crops It is its duty to guard.

One wonders what has happened to the
world.

One does indeed.

Still, there may be more to this than
meets the eye.

One must wait and see.

Rooney! Rooney!

Would you want some, Mr. Richards?

Yeah. Where'd you put that sheep dip,
Rooney?

What sheep dip's that, Mr. Richards?

You know what sheep dip. The drum of
sheep dip concentrate I asked you to get

out half an hour ago.

Oh, that sheep dip. I'm just on my way
to fetch it. Yeah, we'll get a move on.

Well, because you're a casual labourer
doesn't mean to say you can be so

downright bloomin' casual.

How much longer do you reckon you'll be
burning? Oh, not long now, boss. Tree's

bringing the rest over on the truck.

Yeah, well, as long as he doesn't take
all day.

Very nice, too.

I'll be back. Some more of you that
place later.

Rooney?

Rooney? Here I am, Your Honour.

I can see where you are, Rooney.

It's not your carcass I want to feast my
eyes on.

Where's my flaming sheep tip?

It's over... I fetched it out and put it
down there myself, Your Honour. Well,

it's not there now, Rooney.

Somebody's pinched it.

Now, listen.

Do us both a favour, Rooney. Get your
act together.

Fetch me a drum of sheep tip now!

Yes, sir. Right away, sir.

Pinched it.

What sort of idiot would want to pinch a
drum of sheep tip?

She's a poor aunt.

It ain't the best sheep to live with,
but rather, it ain't the worst as

Now then, what we got here?

Next,

I will beat you to it.

Onion.

Whoa, whoa.

Chinese turnip.

Wouldn't there be something else?

Where did they put them dang dapplies?

Aha, there you is.

You dang bum swizzle dapply box.

Let go of my hand.

I'll be flood -polluted.

That's handy.

Dang, stupid Applies.

You should be on Applie trees.

Yeah, if you was on Applie trees, old
Wurzel wouldn't have to clamber up a

ladder to get at you.

Ow!

All right, you Applies. I'm coming to
get you.

Hey!

Well, string me up a dog, Tucker.

What do you think you're doing? Me, huh?
I was making up a decider. That's what

I'm doing, see? You half -wit.

Those are my fries. Cops is orange. They
ain't oranges.

They's apples.

Come back here.

I'll give you something to think about.

I've already got something to think
about.

I'm thinking about that stick you're
holding in your hand. Come on, get out

the way, you girl. Come on. Out of the
way. Move, move, move.

Go on, then. Clear off.

But if I ever catch you back here again,
I'll give you, what, four?

One -four, five -four, one -four.

Bah!

Bah!

Bah, Wellington Goose. There are more
sheepses in New Zealand than there is

rooks in Tenaka Field.

Yes, Virgil, and to what particular
honour do we owe your presence here this

morning?

If you please, Your Honour, one of me
hands has dropped off.

Does not please me at all, Wurzel.

Dropped off, you say?

That's right, Mr. Crowman, sir.

Dropped right off at the rink while I
was out at work.

And there was this great crow, your
gullibility, sweeping and diving down at

them poor little sheeps this 50 bucks.
So I was waving me arms up and down and

flapping me hands, and you'd never
believe what happened. All right, all

Wurzel, that's more than sufficient.
Now, did you bring the mission hand

with you?

Yes, indeed, Your Majestic, yes.

Where do you suppose this label came
from, Wurzel?

Label, your detectiveness?

Label, Wurzel.

From Richard's orchard. All right, I
know where it come from, Mr.

Cromancer. Unless some little birdie
perched it there when I weren't looking.

Cheeky things, them sparrows.

There.

I've fitted your new mitten, Wurzel. How
does it feel?

I'm very empty of making menmanship.

My, my, my.

That's a rare old music box thing you've
got there, Mr. Crowman. Pay attention,

Wurzel. How's the hand?

Particularly agile, your surgical ship,
yes.

And a nice new glove to go with it and
all.

You know, I reckon that a scarecrow
could do a rare bit of crow scaring if

had one of them music box things to keep
him company in his lonely field.

Very probably, Wurzel.

We're not going to find that out, are
we? Never mind.

We've both of us got work to do. That we
have, Your Magnificence. Very important

work and all. Exactly. You must get back
to your crow, Skerry, and I must get

your new cousin delivered to Farmer
Cooharry out in Peowocka -Wocka. Ain't

going to play one more tune on that
there music box thing of yours, Mr.

before you go?

No, Wurzel.

You've wasted enough of my time this
morning as it is. Now, off you go.

Well, not even I'll put you in your
musicality.

It's worth it.

Tune in, Mr. Crowman, sir.

Oh, my, my, my, will you look at that.
All fixed up and good as new, eh?

To be on the safe side, I should put it
under lock and key.

No, he wouldn't dare.

Wouldn't you be under ordinary
circumstances, Mr. Crowman, sir?

But I have to borrow it, you see. And I
need it for a very special...

Begging your pardon, Your Magnificence,
but I know as it weren't a right, proper

and seemly thing to pinch... Excuse me,
to borrow the other magnificence's music

-frock machine, nor his weedy thing.

But I had to do it, Your World, didn't
I? Or it wouldn't have been a right,

proper and splendid tribulation either.

We guessed that it was you.

Hey, that's the crime man's gramophone.
He's next.

Borrowed, Mr Clever Cogs, borrowed.

What is it, Weasel?

Is there going to be a party?

That's for me to know.

And you titty -nosy parkers to find out.

I bet it's going to be a birthday party.
Here's a birthday every month.

Well, it ain't going to be a birthday
party to there.

When I doesn't have a birthday every
month, I don't have as many as that.

I has them once a fortnight, no more and
no less.

And that's because I's a scarecrow.

And scarecrows does have more than
humans.

And that's because Scarecrow's arms and
legs and head and that gets born at

different times. Well, if it isn't a
birthday party, why have you hung up all

these decorations?

Because it's a birthday celebration,
that's why.

He means celebration.

Well, that's what I said, didn't I?

Celebration. Anyway, time to party.

It's going to be tea time.

What? A tea dance?

Yeah. A slice of cake and a cup of tea
dance. And all my friends will be there.

Because on account of it being my
birthday, see, and all the pretty ladies

be fighting over who's going to be my
partner.

And they'll all bring me presents.

All? All who?

Don't ask me. There's nobody here but
him and us. Yeah, and there'll be nobody

except me in half a minute.

So you three can push off.

Anyway, tea dances ain't for titties.

Titties is too small to dance with. So
go on, buzz off. Don't worry. We're

going. We will... I didn't want to come
to your silly tea dance anyway. Not to

eat dirty, smelly vegetables or drink
sheep dip.

We'll have our own party with real cream
cakes and custard tarts. Come on, Manu,

we'll have a picture. Here, hang on a
minute. Did you say real cream cakes and

custard tarts? Yes.

Well, I does dance with Titchy
sometimes.

There's a special dance that I made up
for an occasion just like this. It's

called Get Down on Your Knees, Excuse
Me, especially for Titchy.

I'll show you.

All

right,

then, sling your hooks. See if I care.

Oh, well, so what? We short no dancing,
partner.

Let this tea dance get pricky.

Yeah, that's finished.

That's number one.

Now for the tea dance.

All I need now is for Aunt Sally to come
knocking at that door to make this the

best tea dance in the whole wild world.

Come in, Aunt Sally.

Your handsome intended awaits you.

Where's your... Borrowed, Your Honour.

Borrowed just for the afternoon.

As seen as I was a speckled occasion.

Special occasion or not, this is coming
home with me.

But it's for me birthday celebrations,
Your Pomposity.

And it wasn't good of having birthday
celebrations if there ain't no music.

like having tea without cake.

But you've already had two birthday
parties this month.

And that's why I'm having another one,
Your Honour, to make it an even number.

And who do you think will be coming to
this party of yours?

Eh?

Well, all me friends.

Friends?

Who, for instance?

Parsnip Franz. You know very well I had
to put him down last summer when his

head burst into flour.

Moshikumira.

perished in the Black September Fungi
Blight.

What about my old friend Soggy Boggart?
Soggy Boggart is 12 ,000 miles away in

the old country.

Who is he?

Is that very far, your holiness?

Well, if you took all the scarecrow
poles in the world and laid them end to

it would not cover half the distance.

Certainly it is too far to come for a
tea dance.

But it's always me, Aunt Sally.

Why would a lady of her quality want to
come and eat sheep dip and dirty

potatoes? Because there's new potatoes,
extra tasty.

There ain't nothing so good as new
potatoes and sheep's dip sauce.

Anyway, she'll have to come.

She's my intended.

I hate to say this, Wurzel, but I think
you could be in for a big

disappointment. How's that, your
despondency?

I don't believe anyone will be coming to
your party.

Why not, Your Holiness?

Well, to put it bluntly, Wurzel, you're
not the most popular person hereabouts.

Popsular?

He's very popsular, Mr Cromack.

Oh, Wurzel's got more popsular than he
knows what to do with.

But you have no friends, Wurzel. I have
two.

No genuine friends.

To have genuine friends, one must be
kind, generous, thoughtful and honest.

Why all of those things, you
magnificent?

No, Wurzel, you are not.

You are mean, selfish, thoughtless and
dishonest.

And you are also very dirty.

And that is why you have no friends.

And that is why no one will come to your
party.

However, far be it from me to put a
damper on your birthday festivities.

I will let you keep the gramophone for
tonight, but you must promise me to look

after my records.

I will, Mr. Cromancer. You can rely on
me. I can't rely on you for anything,

Wurzel Gummidge, as you very well know.

Just be sure to return my gramophone in
the morning.

So a Wurzel ain't got no friends, eh?

I'd known it was going to end up like
this.

I'd have worn me miserable, Ed, if I had
one.

What are you staring at?

Nothing. Yes, you are. No, we're not.

Yes, you are. You've been spying on me.

You've been whispering and sniggering at
poor old Wurzel behind his back.

No, we haven't. Yes, you have.

You've been making fun of me because no
one's turned up to me teadog.

Tough cheese.

We would have come, but we weren't
invited.

Well, that's on account of you being so
titchy.

But seeing as how you're both here, you
may as well come in and join the fun.

What fun? It doesn't look like much fun
to me.

Well, that's where you're wrong, see?
You can have all the fun you like at a

dance.

Here, you see what I got here?

Look at this.

Christmas cake.

Christmas was seven months ago.

What's that green stuff on top of it?

Ice cream. No, it's not. It's mould.

Green mould.

That's right.

Green mold icing.

Nice and furry.

Sticks to your teeth.

But the best thing of all is this here
music box thing.

You teachers have a listen to this.

It's not supposed to sound like that.

I'll give it a bit of a push.

Not enough to laugh like this.

Let's dance.

I can't dance. I haven't got my dancing
head on.

You don't need a dancing head. Come on.

I wasn't expecting to see you for a bit.

I trust you're treating my gramophone
properly.

Oh, yes, in generosity.

I was just warming it up with a little
bit of a birthday tea dance.

Well, I'm glad to hear it.

Now, Wurzel, about your birthday.

On reflection, I feel I've been a bit
hard on you.

As a gesture of goodwill, I've brought
you a present.

A present?

For me?

Did you hear that, Titchy? Old Wurzel's
getting a birthday present after all.

A crow man?

It's a little birdie.

I'll just pop him into my straw so he
can get his bearings.

What is it? A shining cookie?

I would have liked to have given you a
robin, but they don't live in this part

of the world.

However, I'm sure you'll like that
little shining cuckoo, and it'll keep

insects out of your straw.

I've noticed a colony of rather
unpleasant black beetles has taken a

your stuffing.

A little shiny cuckoo to keep the creepy
crawlies out of me, innit?

Thank you very much indeed, Mr. Croman,
sir. I reckon this year's birthday

present is the finest birthday present
I've ever had.

Here you are, sisters.

What about that, Natalie? Ain't this a
birthday worth remembering?

But no one's turned up.

Yes, well, I was coming to that.

As it happens, the Piwaka Waka Sheriffs
and Shepherds Social Club is stuck for

somewhere to hold their annual barn
dance, and I've taken the liberty of

they could have it here.

Have it here?

Yes. I'm begging your pardon, Your
Honour, but... Might an humble scarecrow

asking when it's likely to arrive?

Well, right now.

What are you three doing up?

Nothing.

Well, how about giving poor old Wurzel a
bite of that there sausage sandwich?

Why? Didn't you get anything to eat? No,
I didn't. I've been pushing and shoving

and grabbing and I still didn't get
nothing.

Yeah, I'll tell you what.

How about swapping a bit of this here
yummy Christmas cake for a bite of that

there sausage sandwich?

We've got something much better.

What?

Hello, Ben.

I thought I'd find you three down here.

Here. How about giving me one of them
there creamy cakes like what you

me? You don't want that. We've prepared
your official picnic.

It's in the basket.

Moldy old Christmas cake, raw potatoes,
dirty carrots, and sheep soup.

Yeah, well, thank you very much.

In other words, don't wish to seem
ungrateful.

If it's all the same to you... I'd
rather have a sticky bun or three, or a

without their lemonade.

We haven't got enough to share. It's
either that or nothing.

Ah!

Creamy cakes, custard tarts, and
lemonade too.

Dang me if you knew I'd been pulling all
words all day.

That's just to show that you have got
cream.

Lots more than you think.